Lulz Bar and Grill [All welcome]

[happyturtle]

[ACRO/Town]

This greasy little diner is in Acronymia, but sits near enough to the portal that Townies can come and go easily. The light is dim, the air is filled with cigarette smoke, the kitchen is filthy, and the patrons are rowdy. But it serves the best coffee in town, and their omelets and hashbrowns are to die for. They'll serve any food you like, as long as you like it fried. Drinks are available, but ask for anything more complex than a gin and tonic and you can expect to hear grumbling from the staff. There's a defibrillator hanging on the wall.

Best of all, for those who want to conduct Nefarious Business or have fights, there's no uptight demigoddess librarian ruining all the fun.

NPC's can be godmodded by anyone. Women speak in orange, men in gray.

Sheree: A good ole girl in her fifties, hair dyed red with gray roots is behind the bar.
Travis: The portly, balding, short order cook in a greasy apron works the grill.

Feel free to introduce other waiters/waitresses as desired. And if you're clever enough to make them talk in diner slang, that's awesome.

Enjoy!

Rules:
1. No godmodding (except the staff, as above)
2. See 1

Edit: Thanks to Raistlin, apparently there are now rooms for rent upstairs. Wheee! :smallwink:

[Reinholdt]

Reinholdt shows up. A grill is never a bad place to investigate. Besides, maybe he could meet some new people without having that meddling psychic try to ruin his reputation.

Though he still worked for Tessa, so he'd have to return eventually.

Reinholdt looks around to see who's here.

[Morty]

Dipsnig strolls in. He smirks after looking around. Now that's a place for him.

[happyturtle]

A good ole girl in her fifties, hair dyed red with gray roots is behind the bar. "Hey, you going to stand there all day or place an order?"

[Reinholdt]

"Yes of course. I'll take some fish if you have it."

[Morty]

Do you serve mushrooms?

[Fostire]

Fostire walks in and sits in one of the tables. A notepad appears on his hand and he starts writing stuff on it.

[happyturtle]

"Travis! I got a fish for one and mushrooms for another!" Sheree yells to a man standing at the grill about 4 feet away from her.

[Morty]

I feel at home, Dipsnig mutters to anyone who might be near.

[happyturtle]

A few minutes later, Sheree brings out the orders. Fried fish and fried mushrooms, served with hashbrowns and onions. Smacking her gum, she heads over to Fostire. "What can I getcha honey?"

[Fostire]

Fostire pauses from writing on his notepad and looks at sheree
Yes, can you tell me where I am?

[Morty]

Dipsnig pays, begins to eat and is surrouded by grey mist of Deadtime.

[happyturtle]

Sheree leans over and taps the logo on the laminated menu sitting in the little condiment stand on the table. "Lulz Bar and Grill, sweetie."

[Fostire]

Excellent!
He scribbles something on his notepad and closes it. The notepad disappears.
Thanks. Could you give me directions to PEACE headquarters please?

[happyturtle]

"Across Freedom glades, turn left at the little church, carry on for a mile or so, and then you'll start seeing blackened trees and rotting corpses, and then you're there." she says, sounding like something she recites often.

[Fostire]

Thanks a lot. I've been lost for days.
He doesn't look like someone who's been lost for days, but he doesn't look like his lying either. I guess it doesn't matter 'cause he's already gone.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG floats in to the manager's office. I need a job. But don't want to work with mean demanding people that don't enjoy themselves while they work. Do you have a position like that, open? I can play piano.

[happyturtle]

"Sweetie, do you see a piano in this dive?" Sheree asks. But then her face softens. "What's a half-pint like you need with a job anyway?" and she attempts to ruffle TLG's hair.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG let's her ghost hair be ruffled, only a bit, as she looks around. I have a roll-up one. And I need money, to get help.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren opens the door, stepping inside, his white clothes contrasted by his black wings. The corners of his mouth twitch, into an almost-smirk as he looks around, the Incubus Aura still very much active.

[happyturtle]

Sheree goes glassy eyed and fans herself as she gawks openly at Jared, TLG forgotten.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren grins as he digs into a pocket and pulls out a cigarette, lighting it and taking a drag. Ah, the fun of not having to utilize techniques. Of course, he's a shallow bastard, and Sheree's much too old, so he's more looking around for cute waitresses.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia follows him in. What are we doing here, Jaren? She looks disgustedly at the old crone.

TLG looks disgustedly at Jaren. She sticks her tongue out at him.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren laughs good-naturedly at The Little Girl. He's not interested in her anyway. I don't know, I figured it'd be interesting to drop by. He says cryptically.

[Lex-Kat]

She's in no way interested in him, either. She just glares at him.

The she turns and attempts to poke the lady. Hey!! Don't pay attention to him. He's evil. Can I have a job or what?

[celtois]

A rabbit hop into the bar. Do you sell carrots?

[happyturtle]

Sheree sighs, not taking her eyes off Jaren. "Sure, honey. Whatever you want."

She doesn't notice the rabbit.

((deadtime. Please feel free to make npc waitstaff or use Sheree and Travis))

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren frowns, having not found any waitresses to his liking (Unless someone else would like to play one, that is. I have a problem with having two characters I control interact). Well Vidalia, looks like it's just going to be us tonight. Lucky you. He says, smirking. This would, of course, be the perfect time for a pretty waitress to try and glomp him.

[celtois]

Sure I'll play one. A very pretty young waitress comes out from behind the bar. Can I help you sir?

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren looks her up and down, the corners of his mouth again twitching into a half-smirk. That depends. He turns up the Incubus Aura, back to full strength.

[celtois]

On wh- Oh...your real cute... she runs towards him.

[Raistlin1040]

I try darling. He says, taking the cigarette out of his mouth and stamping it out on the bar counter. What do you think Vidalia?

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia looks at Jaren lustfully. Yes. She thinks. But then the waitress comes out. Vidalia looks at her with envy. Anything you want, love. She says, lustfully.


((DEADTIME))

[celtois]

The waitress tries to start peeling off Jadens' clothing. Your are...wow..so hot. I will make you mine.

[Raistlin1040]

Upstairs, darlings, would be preferable. jaren says to the waitress girl, walking up to a room, followed by Vadalia and opening the door for Vidalia and the waitress.

[celtois]

The waitress follows him, pulling off her own clothes as she goes. Hurry please..I can't wait.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren chuckles. An eager one. She won't be hard. Assuming she goes inside, Vidalia and Jaren follow, closing the door. You seem...exited, to say the least. What's your name?

[celtois]

Caytlin. My name is Caytlin She finishes undressing herself.

[Raistlin1040]

A beautiful name. And...the curtain drops on the three, with Jaren performing his soul-eating ritual, getting just a nibble of Vidalia's, and a good portion of Caytlin's, which will bond her to Jaren as Vidalia is.

[celtois]

Oh..wow that was....just wow. (Did I mentions she has weak will :smalltongue:) Please..please let me be yours.

[Raistlin1040]

Certainly. Though, you understand you'll be sharing me, with Vidalia, and whomever else decides to join us, of course. Ah, here it is, the true test.

[celtois]

As long as it means I can be with you I'll share you with the whole world...as long as you can still be mine.

[Raistlin1040]

Of course darling. He says, kissing her on the lips, stealing a bit more of her soul. Huh, apparently he doesn't have a problem with using the kissing method, he either just A) Really wanted to piss off Izzy or B) Really wanted in Izzy's pants. Or both. Whatever.

[celtois]

Caytlin grins at him. Great.

[Raistlin1040]

Oh you poor girl, what have you gotten yourself into?

[celtois]

She doesn't know in the slightest. :smalltongue:

[celtois]

fine I'll double post

Alexis enters the grill looking around for a menu of some sort.

[Chas the mage]

Callixtus (the cyborg) enters.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall walks in. He sits down at the bar.

Short description:
A 6'8", black and red, evil looking cyborg. Click the link for a better description.

[celtois]

Alexis orders something to eat. Then waits...for something

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall looks to Alexis, then to Callixtus. Then he sighs and turns back to the bar. I still wish I could drink.

[celtois]

What would you drink anyways. She sighs and gets a cup of tea.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Alcohol. And lots of it. He says this in a slightly sarcastic tone. Slightly.

[celtois]

Whatever, she sighs at the stupidity of the cyborg. Why did you two follow me?

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall looks about as indignant as he can with an expressionless face. Follow you? Lady, if I was following you, you be dead.

[Chas the mage]

Coincidence
He says, sounding honest.
He then turn to skraal
I can drink!

[celtois]

Undoubtedly. Alexis sighs and walks out of the grill back to the taverna.

[KerfuffleMach2]

You can drink? Well isn't that good for you.

[Chas the mage]

He starts playing with his robotic hand, until he takes it off and starts whacking it againts the table aout of boredom.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall contemplates taking his saw-shield to Callixtus, but deadtime hits.

[happyturtle]

Sheree wipes down the bar with a dirty rag while Elvis plays on the jukebox, and bumps the thread to remind the overnight players that this place is here if the Taverna gets full. :smallsmile:

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia walks down stairs. She looks like heck warmed over. Where is he? She asks no one in particular.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren's at a table, smoking a cigarette, his Incubus Aura RAGING with the recent aquisition of part of Caytlin's soul.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia fixes her gaze on Him. She walks over to Jaren. You were wonderful, baby. She says dreamily as she attempts to sit on his lap.

[Raistlin1040]

Always am. Jaren remarks. Oh you arrogant bastard. Vidalia can sit on his lap, though he won't be particuarly receptive to it.

[Lex-Kat]

She tries to snuggle up to him. Where are we going next, hmmm?

[Raistlin1040]

I have no idea. Jaren shrugs, frowning slightly at the snuggling. So, what did you think of Caytlin?

[celtois]

The plot clone of Alexis walks to the door of the grill..

(Do I need to bother with a description?)

[Lex-Kat]

She was cute. But I like her better. Vidalia points at Alexis.

She smiles, then stands up and walks over to her. Hello, sugar cheeks.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren smirks. Oh this will be fun, no protection from Tessa, and Jaren's Aura even stronger than it was yesterday.

[celtois]

Alexis opens seeing who is here attempts to leave back out the door. Oh..hi...Maybe I'll just go to the taverna. >.>

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren disappears, reappearing RIGHT behind Alexis, so close they're almost touching. Now, that wouldn't do, would it dear? He whispers into her ear.

[celtois]

Why not? Can't I just go. She tries to make a dash for the door. Trying to get out.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren's blocking the doorway, so she'll run right into him, though he won't budge. As I said before, his Aura is strengthened to near-irrestitable, though Alexis' paladin training gives her a bit of an edge. Now darling, why would you ever want to leave me? He asks, his voice dripping with magic.

[Rutskarn]

Abruptly, Rutskarn barrels past Jaren into the common room, wearing a shirt (stained), a greasy greatcoat (on fire), and a fox trap (around foot).

Gibbering and gargling incoherently, foam dribbling out of his mouth, he launches himself onto the floor, rolling around in a panic and slamming the fox trap against the floor. A live fox appears to be pinned, by the tail, to his leg, and is biting anything and anyone within range.

After flailing about for a few moments, Rutskarn seizes the fox by the ankles and beats him against the floor until the fox stops twitching.

Still muttering, spitting and cursing, Rutskarn roughly breaks the fox trap off with a buck knife. He then strips off the smoking greatcoat, throwing it roughly outside.

Rutskarn begins to quiet down. A few moments later, he approaches the bar, silently. He takes a seat, looks up at the nearest employee, and speaks:

"Couple questions.

Firstly, where am I.

Secondly, who set that fox trap.

Thirdly, why the hell do I keep having to top my last entrance?!"

[celtois]

Because I don't want to be near you in the first place....She backs away from him trying to keep near the edge of his aura at all times. Why must you continues to go after me.

[AmberVael]

A large quantity of cigarette smoke whirls around, sucking from every corner of the bar until it forms a condensed mass that turns into the mediator with a small effect that ripples the appearance of the area, as if it had been distorted a moment by water or glass. It was strange, and rather disturbing.
But hey, the smoke is gone, at least for a few moments. That's a plus, and makes up for the weirdness.
The green robed woman peers around the bar for a while, taking in all the customers.

[Raistlin1040]

Because you're beautiful, and quite the catch. You're also fairly good at resisting. Jaren's voice drops. I want you. He says, staring right at Alexis' eyes, moving near her. Really, the Aura doesn't have a limit. If he can be seen, it's active on the target. It just strengthens based on lack of distance.

[celtois]

Well she tries to keep away from him..not wanting him to be able to get close.
Well thank you. But I really don't want to have my soul eaten. Please leave me alone.


Description of Alexis
She is wearing a silver circlet on her head and is wearing a chain shirt with black breeches. A black tunic and a black tabard with a silver unicorn on it. She has a longsword in a sheath at her side. She has strait blonde shoulder length hair and silvery eyes. (She is around 19) She is also quite curvy in the right places. Overall very very attractive.

[Raistlin1040]

I won't eat all of it. That'd kill you, and that's not what I want at all. Just a snack. Jaren's tall, darkhaired, with silver eyes and black feathered wings. He's wearing a black coat with a white spider (how fitting) on the back, dark pants, and shiny black shoes.

[Rutskarn]

"No, seriously, guys. Questions one, two, and especially goddamn three. You have 20 seconds. You final grade will depend on this. Chop frickin' chop."

[celtois]

What makes you think I want to lose any of my soul? Look at her she seems to have lost more then her soul. She is like a thrall to you. How about this you keep him away from me and I'll answer your questions.

[AmberVael]

"The proper charms will ward evil spirits away... or invite them in."
Says mediator in a voice that is soft, but carries through the tavern to the two quarreling. She then looks to the man who arrived just before she did.
"I'm afraid I did not hear your questions, but I might have answers for them. Come here."

((For your benefit, Rutskarn, since I think everyone else has seen it, this is Mediator:
http://i62.photobucket.com/albums/h107/sjunderw/GreenLady.png
She's also known as the Green Lady, should it come up))

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia walks up behind her. It's really not as bad as you might think. Like I told you last night. He's the best I've ever been with. She tries to drape her arms over Alexis' shoulders.

[celtois]

Alexis worried about being help moves so the attempt to drape her arms over her shoulders won't work.

I don't want to lose any part of my soul. Nor become a thrall. Now please let me depart. She continues to try and keep her distance

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren sighs. I do dislike violence. His voice echoes in Alexis' mind, again trying to Dominate her, but also keeping the meaning very clear. You have two choices. Submit willingly, be granted your life, pleasure, and a special place with me, or refuse and I will simply TAKE your soul from you.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn, startled by the sudden appearance of the moderator, begins to speak.

"Well, okay, I'll retract the last two, since none of you people look like hunters, and the last one, because only whatever cruel god follows me like a raincloud really knows the answer to that one. I'll settle for: where in the 13.3 hells am I?"

[celtois]

As do I. which is why as you may have noticed I have not drawn a weapon.
She seems to be a lot stronger mentally right now. Having not just been sitting beside him for a long period of time.
How do you plan to take it from me demon? Kill me and rip it out? Rape me?

[AmberVael]

"You are in a planar nexus. It's a focal point of a large number of planes, so "where" you are really can't be completely determined since it shifts relative to most other places in a regular manner."
The mediator says calmly.

[Raistlin1040]

Both perfectly viable options. Unpleasant, perhaps, but easily arranged, and easily carried out. Jaren says nothing regarding her statement about the weapon. You won't regret anything, I can promise you that.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn stares for a moment. And then another moment. The next moment, Rutskarn stares.

After one more moment of staring, Rutskarn begins again. "O....kay. Inter planar...neck brace. Sounds like a party." Rutskarn opens his mouth to speak, thinks, then desperately asks, "This place have a name? I find that when you've got a piece of iron and a feral animal around your leg and a garment that's on fire, your concentration and attention to detail tends to lapse. A little."

[celtois]

She glares at him. I will not submit to you. In any way. She tries to head for the door. (He should of tried to wear her down first. :smalltongue:)

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia grabs for her hand. Please, don't go. She looks oh-so-sad. I need you. You need to save me. She smiles endearingly.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren laughs. Suddenly, a portal appears in the doorway, taking up all the space.

[AmberVael]

"The general locale is known as Acronymia, I believe, but I'm afraid I don't have the name of this particular building. It's too new- no spirits have really lingered here."
Mediator says, as if she were explaining something completely normal.

[celtois]

Alexis looks torn... How can I help you? How can I save you? Then she sees the portal. Now I can't leave? Can I.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn looks around once, at the emotional drama, high-stakes bargaining, and intense scenes occurring all throughout the bar.

Rutskarn looks at the Mediator, then at the crowd, then back at the Mediator.

"Think there's any chance I could sell something here?" he asks hopefully.

[Raistlin1040]

Be grateful i haven't tried to throw you in. The resulting pain would be very dangerous to your health. Jaren says, taking a cigarette from his pocket and lighting it.

[AmberVael]

"Possibly. Depends on what you were trying to sell."
Mediator seems to lose a little interest, and glances over at Alexis.
"There is always a way out of situations, girl."

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn's hopeful expression fades into uncertainty. He definitely looks lost.

After a moment, he turns back to the bar. "I'll settle for something to drink," he mutters, pulling a random bottle off the shelf. He looks left and right--staff and patrons seem otherwise occupied. Whistling innocently, he pours the fluid from the bottle into his (empty) hip flask.

[celtois]

Yes there is always a way out...It just isn't always a pleasant way. Alexis smiles. She thinks she knows how to get out. I doubt you would throw me in. Waste all the effort you've done.

[Raistlin1040]

Perhaps, but you don't know where the portal leads. Jaren says, now disinterested with Alexis and her words.

[AmberVael]

"You know... I often help those who are in need."
Says the mediator, slipping a deck of cards into her hand and beginning to shuffle them again.
"This isn't quite the typical situation I run into, but I see little reason I couldn't handle it anyways."
But she's not making any move just at the moment. Maybe she's waiting for something from one of them?

[celtois]

No I don't..since I don't know. Should I chance it? She looks at the mediator temporally distracted. What help for me or help for him?

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia tries to entwine herself around Alexis. She looks deep into her eyes. Pleeeeeease. She may feel something moving up her leg.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn begins humming a tune that doesn't have a name, but if it did, would be called "Don't mind me, just the innocent non-crazy salesman stealing a large quantity of booze."

Afterwards, he semi-casually rolls the bottle back over the counter, pulls out a pad of paper, and begins writing down a few notes.

[celtois]

Alexis being distracted doesn't notice until to late that Viladia is coming and ends ups being entwined. Please do what? She shiver and tries to move when she feels something on her leg.

[AmberVael]

"Hmmm. Well, I typically don't deal with antagonists, so I would have to say you're more likely to receive my help."
She smiles a little, which, while genuine, is rather disturbing considering the situation she's viewing so calmly and kindly.
"As long as someone is willing to pay a price- which I can guarantee you is far less than your soul."

[KerfuffleMach2]

((Hey Vael! Been a while.))

Skrall undeadtimes. He's at the bar, no drink in front of him. He looks around, taking in the sights.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia attempts to teleport Alexis and herself away from Lulz, to Taverna.

[AmberVael]

The mediator makes a gesture with her fingers as if she were finding a string in midair and tugging it sharply. Vidalia will likely find that her teleportation has been momentarily delayed by some strange means.
"Don't be rude. I don't know whether she has accepted my offer yet. If she doesn't... then she's yours."
Mediator smiles darkly, fully willing to give her up should she not pay the price.

[celtois]

What is your Price? She seems surprised by the sudden movement then stop.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren blows a smoke ring, interested in The Mediator and her magic.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia looks shocked and dismayed. I wanted to protect you. She whispers.

[AmberVael]

"Hmmm..."
The mediator seems to consider for a few moments, placing a few fingers over her lips, while Alexis will feel herself weighed by an disembodied gaze that she somehow knows is the mediator's... but does seem to emanate from her body at all.
"A single lock of your hair."

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn coughs quietly.

"Uh. So sorry, didn't want to interrupt this...whatever it is you crazy kids do here, but did somebody want to not teleport somewhere?"

Beat.

"'Cos, as a licensed salesman of Premature Annihilation Industries, I am fully qualified to sell any of you folks this fine anti-teleportation planar anchor thing. Looks like a lovely lapel pin. Excellent value. Here."

Before anyone can stop him, he slides the lapel pin into Alexis's jacket.

"Free sample."

There's a moment's silence.

"...sorry, did I say something?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall snorts a little at the Mediator's request. It sounds odd coming from a robotic body.

[celtois]

I didn't stop you...I think she did. Thank you. She looks at the mediator. Why would you want that and what would you do if I refused?

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn pauses, realizing what the mediator had just said.

"Wait, did she just offer you teleportation aid thing in exchange for..." His brow furrowed.

Muttering "How can they afford to stay in business at those prices," he quickly flips through his employee handbook.

A moment later, he reluctantly declares:

"According to company policy, I am obliged to offer you the same service for...geez...half a lock of hair."

[AmberVael]

"There are many uses for the hair of a young lady- charms of protection and virility, the ability to spin youth from age. Many spells can be worked."
Mediator's lips quirk.
"As for what I would do if you didn't take my offer? Well... I'd relax my hold on the teleportation magic your friend used, and then you'd be free to deal with things on your own- if you could. If you do accept, well, I'll make sure you get out of the entire mess safely."

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia looks at the Green Lady, then at Jaren. She looks scared, confused, and in total admiration.

((Is that possible??))

[celtois]

So what would you do if I accepted how would you help? So if said no to your offer Vidalias teleport would go through?

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn speaks up.

"Uh, okay, I know we're working at cross-purposes here, miss...creepy lady, but I kinda did just lend/sell her a teleportation anchor. Are you implying our product isn't functional? Because that hurts, it really does."

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall continues watching, wondering if he can instigate anybody enough to start a fight.

[AmberVael]

"If you agreed... I would make sure you could leave safely, and would not be further intruded upon by either of them for the span of three days, if you were careful."
Mediator says.
"If you disagree, I will simply undo what I have done on the situation already- and leave you to sort things out from there. I will have no further part in things."
She glances at Rutskarn.
"I claim nothing about your products- I only make claims of my own actions."

[Lex-Kat]

Take her offer. It's better than mine. A tear forms on Vidalia's cheek.

[celtois]

If I agree will you promise not to use my hair for anything that would hurt anybody? Alexis seems to be torn..not sure whether to takes this strange ladies offer or to accept Vidalias's help. She doesn't know either of them so it is rather hard for her to know who to trust.
Don't cry...what is wrong with your offer? Both get me out of here. I don't want anybody to be sad.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn looks left and right.

"Uh, okay." He lifts one palm straight up, tapping the other on top of it in a 'time out' gesture. "See, I think we're having a little failure of communication, here. The charm. Stops her. From teleporting. So, see, she's actually pretty much set. Unless I'm missing something...?"

[AmberVael]

"If you agree, I promise that I will not use your hair in a spell that injures, curses, or otherwise negatively impacts another."
Says the mediator.
She glances at Rutskarn.
"Teleporting is not the only danger she faces."

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall calls over to Rutskarn.

I think you should probably stay out of this one, bud.

[Lex-Kat]

Because my Love can follow me. She suddenly looks dreamily at Jaren. And I still need him. She starts to loosen her grip on Alexis. She says she can protect you for three days. She drops off Alexis and kneels before Jaren. I'm sorry, Love. I... I shouldn't have interfered.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn pauses, sensing that he's a little out of his depth here.

He mutters something about, "A wide suite of products, geared towards any situation."

He then turns to Alexis.

"Okay, see, I can actually offer you some other little knicknacks that help with the supernatural. Soul stealing, entrapment, the whole shebang. Comes with the territory when you're an employee of Ultimate Boomstick, Inc. Anyways, I could probably lend you a hand too...a scientifically tested, well-documented hand available for a low, low price. Insurance included. Whaddya say?"

He doesn't seem to have actually heard Skrall.

[celtois]

It's alright...I will try and help you if I can Vidalia She looks at the sales man and pulls off the charm. Please ask me next time. I don't feel like explaining the situation. She looks at the mediator I'll accept your offer.

[Raistlin1040]

No. You shouldn't have. Jaren says fairly coldly.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall doesn't bother trying again. Once is more than enough, he figures. So, he just keeps watching.

[Lex-Kat]

Please forgive me. I'll do anything you ask of me. Anything at all. She tries to wrap her arms around his lower legs. She looks up at him, pitifully.

[Raistlin1040]

LOL grovelling. Jaren looks down at Vidalia with some disdain. Soon after however, his face cracks into a dark smile. I'll think of something. It won't be pleasant, of course. Not at all.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn sighs. Thankfully for all present, it's been a long day, and he's not about to get into an interminable lecture on Supporting the Average Salesman in this Economy.

He does flick a card over to Alexis, though. "Alright, fair's fair. If you do need any help with...your friends, there, or anything, come here first. Rutskarn, licensed salesman of Smoking Crater Subsidiaries. Give us a ring. We'll be here."

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall calls over to Rutskarn again. With a different reason this time. A salesman, huh? Come here, I got a couple things to ask you. He waves a metallic hand, beckoning to Rutskarn.

[AmberVael]

"Very well."
The mediator stands, and those nearby can almost feel an unworldly pulse of energy emanating from her. Magic- power- energy and knowledge untold whirl and around her, ready to strike-
And then it ceases, and the mediator plucks a single card from her deck and offers it to Alexis.
"Take this."
If examined, the card seems to be similar to a tarot card. The back of it has a stylized design of strange green and black swirls surrounding a white tree- a tree that has a blue reflection of itself beneath it. The face of the card shows a three on the top left corner, and on the lower right corner, and in the center is a picture of vines and mist swirling around a heart.
As soon as she takes it, there will be a ward of energy around her that prevents Jaren- and those possessed and controlled by him(such as Vidalia)- from touching, attacking, or otherwise moving against her. Alexis will feel that if she wishes, she can use it to increase the area of the ward to around twenty feet in radius, so that none of them can cross that area either.
"There are a few things. It cannot be used as a weapon or to attack- but to defend. Never attempt to exert the magical influence to banish- only to keep at bay.
It cannot protect you if you do not keep it on your person at all times.
Its protection will only last three days."

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn points to himself, as if asking for clarification that he was being addressed. A few moments later, he walks over to Skrall.

He sits down, shaking his head. "Buncha wackos, huh? I tell you, I always end up in the crummy places. Stupid Dibbler and his stupid..." He continues muttering, then realizes that Skrall is waiting on him and stops.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Yeah, strange people, sure. He waves off that topic quickly. Listen, I wanna know what you offer in the area of explosives.

[celtois]

Thank you Alexis puts the card in her pocket. She then gets a lock of her own hair to give to the mediator in return. Here..is what you asked for.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia, behind her tears, smiles. Thank you, Love. She hugs his legs. She feels a sense of security. Of safety.

((Of, DEADTIMEitis.))

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren turns on his heels and heads back to his room.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn raises a single brow. "Explosives? And whatever gave you the idea that Mushroom Cloud, Ind. sold explosives?"

He paused.

"Don't answer that. Anyway, sorry, it's against my conscience to sell explosives to some man I meet in a pub..." Rutskarn glances around.

"Unless he promises to use them after I've left, savvy?"

[AmberVael]

Mediator inclines her head and takes the strand of hair with long, thin fingers before tucking it away in a pouch at her side.
"It might be best if you go on your way now..."

[celtois]

That I will thank you. Alexis head out the door then back to the taverna.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Rutskarn must be using the term 'man' figuratively, as Skrall looks fully robotic. That's likely, but I can't promise it.

[AmberVael]

Mediator smoothly takes a seat at a table and shuffles her deck of cards, watching Vidalia and Jaren with her strange, disembodied gaze.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn doesn't look terribly happy about the word, "likely."

A war begins to rage behind his eyes.

BIOLOGY TIME, KIDDIES!

The Spotted Rutskarn is a cowardly little animal, prone to backing down without a fight if even the slightest hint of violence is directed his way. He is slippery and smooth-talking, but not terribly confident, and will gladly retreat in a conflict.

Unless--and this is important--there's any chance he's going to make a sale.

Then, well...you're pretty much going to have to kill him to stop him.

"Deal," Rutskarn says. He folds out a catalog. "Now...what kind of explosives?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall is a simple cyborg. He likes money, and he doesn't like people. He deals with people to get what he wants/needs, and that it.

Depends on what you got. And the price, of course.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia follows Jaren. There is a look of triumph in her eyes.

((DEADTIME for real.))

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn looks left and right.

"We-e-e-ell...I do have an interesting little beauty. I wouldn't bring it down off the shelf for just every mug who wandered into my little personal space/shop, but I can see that you, sir(ish), are a connoisseur of things that expand violently. I call it..." Dramatic pause. "Big Sally."

"You want something blown up? Big Sally can blow it...out. Away. You'd need a microscope to find a speck of ash from what you used it on. And for only 14.67 gold coins. Whaddya say? Oh. And guaranteed no crappy mystical seals or whatever. Pure science, this bad boy."

[AmberVael]

Satisfied with her work for the day, Mediator vanishes in a gust of wind and fog.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Well, you've been selling stuff for a while. That sounds like a good price. Better than that guy at the other tavern. He wanted 12,000 gold for a flask of nitroglycerin. Anyway, how big is Big Sally? I need something somewhat small. Easy to carry, easy to hide.

[Rutskarn]

"Big Sally? Oh, he's the size of a gerbil. Name's an honorific. Actually...well, he's exactly the size of a gerbil. Precisely. We know this, by dint of him actually being a gerbil. Easy to reverse engineer."

Rutskarn shrugs.

"As for the price, yeah, what can I say? We here at Manmade Apocalypse, Inc. aim to please."

[KerfuffleMach2]

You got one here I can look at? See if it'll store on me just fine.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn pulls out a grubby, miserable looking gerbil. It's about the size of a tangerine.

"Feed him once a week, he'll keep for a few years if need be. Detonate by pressing his button nose three times and then singing a few bars of Oh Sweet Lady of Mustard Seeds. Comes with an owner's manual. So, whaddya say? Do I have a sale?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

Don't think so. Can't sing, and don't have the patience to take care of a gerbil. Got anything that detonates easily? And I don't have to feed?

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn isn't going down without a fight.

"No, see, it's a snap. See, he's all fed up for this whole week. Don't need to do anything else. He's even genetically engineered not to...eliminate waste. It's a complicated process. Plus, you don't need to sing well, or even sing, really. This one homicidal monk got it to go off by chanting. Seriously, this is the explosive for you. Look at his eyes. Look at his cute little gerbil eyes. He's begging you. He wants you to be the one to turn his innards into a fine mist. You gonna let him down? Oh, and incidentally, you can be anywhere when you sing--er, chant the song. You can just triple-tap his nose and hitail it."

[KerfuffleMach2]

Too much effort. I need something I can just push a button to detonate. One button push. That's it.

[Rutskarn]

Rutskarn sighs.

"Okay, fine. I'll hook you up with Big Ethel. Comparable range and intensity. You push a voodoo facsimilie of the nose. Half the price. Similar feeding schedule. Whaddya say?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall lets out a metallic sigh. What's with the feeding? Seriously? I mean, who wants to feed a bomb?

[Rutskarn]

"Well, we here at Blazing Death Industries believe in giving the consumer quality explosives, and it just so happens that quality is synonymous with gerbil. Tell you what...I like you. I really do. You're a guy who knows what he wants, and what he wants I can provide, so I'm going to do you a favor: I'm going to give Big Ethel his first feeding. Won't take but a second, and he won't need another meal for half a month. We have a sale?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall shakes his head. I'm not buying a bomb I have to feed. Freaking ridiculous.

And then he deadtimes. Night, and Happy New Year!

[Rutskarn]

This time is dead.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia is at Jaren's feet. Waiting for instruction from him.

[celtois]

A illusion of Alexis walks in... (Alexis has nothing to do with the illusion it is a rabbit who is sitting a a few booths back and saw what happened with her yesterday.)

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren is slouching in a chair inside the room, smoking a cigarette, looking rather bored.

[Lex-Kat]

What do you wish to do, Love. She waits expectantly.

[celtois]

The Illusion of Alexis walks towards him..... >.<

[Raistlin1040]

They're inside Jaren's room, with the door closed. Alexis wouldn't be able to see them. Jaren frowns and looks towards Vidalia. I'm not sure.

[celtois]

Oh....I don't know why I thought that...well there is an illusion of Alexis at the grill..as well as a rabbit.

[Lex-Kat]

Vidalia perks up as Jaren looks at her. He is so beautiful. And he loves me, as I love him. We could go to the Tavern and pick up a wench there.

[Raistlin1040]

Jaren stands, his wings extending to their full size. Fine. He says, opening the door and leaving the room, and then the entire Bar (assuming he isn't stopped).

[happyturtle]

Sheree sighs after Jaren as he leaves, earning a glare from Travis.

[Lex-Kat]

Vedalia follows Jaren.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG begins playing her piano.

[celtois]

The rabbit is still sitting in a booth munching on a carrot

[Lex-Kat]

TLG plays the original bunny hop.

[celtois]

The rabbit glares at TLG. That isn't funny.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG smiles, still playing it. I thought you'd like it. It has a catchy tune. She begins playing this (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=akc0v_KTZBM).

[celtois]

So you play lots of music flesh bag? The rabbit just orders a coffee and keeps munching his carrot.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG snirks at this. I'm not a fleshbag, stupid rabbit. I'm a ghost. She sticks her tongue out, and continues playing.

[celtois]

Whatever. The rabbit starts drinking his coffee.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG plays the Bunny Hop in between long stretches of Beethoven.

[celtois]

The rabbit glares at TGL. He is seriously considering hurting TGL now.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG ((The Little Girl, btw)) just keeps playing.

[celtois]

The rabbit is a heartless arrogant bastard...... >.>


The rabbit hopes over to the TLG.

[happyturtle]

Sheree lays an envelope on the piano with TLG's pay in it.

[Lex-Kat]

TLG stops playing to look inside. Thank you miss. I thought you wasn't going to hire me? She ignores the evil rabbit.

[celtois]

The rabbit just glares at her..


actually the rabbit is TN >.> He is just very selfish..

[happyturtle]

Sheree sighs, not taking her eyes off Jaren. "Sure, honey. Whatever you want."

She doesn't notice the rabbit.

((deadtime. Please feel free to make npc waitstaff or use Sheree and Travis))

((Did so hire you :smalltongue:))

Sheree is gossiping with another waitress and doesn't hear TLG.

[Lex-Kat]

((That was while she was enthralled. TLG thought Sheree was just giving her a cold shoulder.))

TLG turns back to her piano. Any requests? She says loudly. She begins playing this. (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=OJ8NJLEH0_k&NR=1)

[celtois]

Whatever..The rabbit hops out.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall undeadtimes. He starts carving things into the bar with one of his claw-like fingers.

((I now have pics of him up on his post. Link's in my sig.))

[Rebonack]

"Goooooooood morning Saint Lewis!" declares Avatar as she throws open her arms and tosses her arms out wide.

This gets her some odd looks from several of the random tavern patrons about.

She begins to wander about the common room, taking in the sights and generally looking far more chipper than necessary. "Wow. A whole bunch of new restaurants have popped up around here since I left."

She plops down next to a couple random dwarves and smiles wide at them. "Hey guys! How's it going?"

Much hilarious dialog ensues.

[KerfuffleMach2]

Skrall undeadtimes. He looks around. He doesn't order anything.

[Rebonack]

Suddenly the bar is filled with gnomes.

And balloons.

And snacks on a snake table.

And punch.

And a disco ball. And streamers. And tinsel. And funky music!

Those lawn gnomes are laying down some serious beats!

Zee suddenly pops into existence as well. "Wooo! A hootenanny!"

[celtois]

So now your in both the town and acronym? Neat

David is here...ish...

[Rebonack]

Avatar is wherever the Narrator thinks having Avatar would be entertaining. Besides which, both Town and Acro-land are connected to the Nexus. And that's what Avatar operates out of.

That aside...

Zee runs over to David and reaches down to grab his hands. "Come on! Dancing!"

The NPCs have already gotten in on it. Ever see a drunk dwarf do the robot? Now you have!

[celtois]

David a a younger man in a suit. Despite being 21 he looks and sounds adorable..>.> He is cute..just plain cute..


I..I...guess. David gets up.

[Jacklu]

help this guy out with... forget it... Ooh! a dwarf doing the robot!

Crow is easily distracted.
I haven't had a good dance party for a while! Hey Zeeky! Look! The Snake!

She shifts rapidly into a dire cobra. The ten foot long, horned snake with red eyes and huge cumbersome fangs begins to twist and shake on the dance floor.

[Rebonack]

"Hey! That's pretty good, Crow!"

Hopefully Crow won't attract the attention of Snake. That would probably be hilarious. And possibly awkward.

Zee looks like... well... She's pictured in the Narrator's spoiler. Dressed modestly enough. Though something about her just seems to cause her to radiate a sense of Joy and unearthly beauty. Probably the fact that she's more real than everything else.

"Don't worry! I don't know how to dance. But I'm good at faking it!" she's got an innate grace to the way she moves. Makes it look like she knows what she's doing.

[celtois]

David knows how to dance...Quite well actually...problem is he is injured...

David smiles at her. I'm sure your wonderful at dancing.

[Rebonack]

Injury! Oh noes!

Injured where? If it's obvious Avatar might notice and decide to try doing something about it. Her method of healing is pretty slow. But it beats being all busted and stuff. "Nah, like I said, I'm just good at faking it! I'm Ezekiel Hannah Bath-Manoah! But everyone calls me Zee. Or Avatar. Or Zeeky if you're Crow."

She smiles wide. "What's your name?"

[celtois]

(It isn't obvious. A chunk of his soul got ripped off. It still causes him to cough up blood from time to time.)

Okay Zee He smiles at her. I'm David

[Jacklu]

Crow looks over at Zee and David.

Hey, check it out! The chicken dance!

And so she shifts to a chicken and starts to do the chicken dance. Hopefully nobody comes over and attacks her...

[Rebonack]

Actually... soul-stuff is something that Zee can note. Especially this close to someone. "Nice to meet you David! I-"

She pauses.

And sniffs.

And gives the man an odd look. "Smells like half of you is missing. Is there a reason for that?"

As for Crow doing the chicken... She's soon joined by a rooster. "My fair lady, I can't help but notice how radiant you are. Might I dance with you?"

[celtois]

I...I...yes there is. Part of my soul has been ripped off. It happened when I used the amulet to save myself and a few other people from a bomb...

[Ashen Lilies]

Kiara Rain, the uber shmexy assassin-on-leave, enters the Bar and Grill, having heard there was a PARTY!!! here.

[Jacklu]

Crow clucks and blushes... Can chickens blush? ... Well, this one just did.

Sure! But you have to swing if you want to dance with this bird!

[Rebonack]

There is indeed a party. Complete with music, food, balloons, disco ball, and lawn-gnome DJs. At present plenty of NPC types are enjoying the hootenanny aside from the few PCs that have shown up.

"Huh, that must have been unpleasant," Zee comments as she continues to pretend that she has any idea how to dance. "I might be able to patch you. Blank Incarnum tends to meld to fit the living soul it's grafted into. It would be kinda tricky though. And time consuming."

The rooster bows in a dignified fashion before joining Crow in the chicken dance. Birds of a feather and all.

[celtois]

I don't know... I really don't know what that is. What exactly are you talking about? Incarnum never heard of it before.

[Jacklu]

Crow keeps dancing with the rooster, even as she appears in the grill once more.

just warp over! Oh! See, it worked!

She promptly vanishes as continuity decides two Crows are one to many for this universe.

[Terry576]

Ven appears, thanks to Crow's flagrant idiotic idea. "Ugh... First I was at the Taverna, then Crow said to think about a dance party, and then I appear here?"

[Rebonack]

Avatar waves cheerfully at Terry when he pops into existence. "Incarnum. It's the stuff that souls are made out of. Normally it's pretty inert so the fact that bits of it are floating around all the time really doesn't make too much of a difference."

Zee ceases her pretend-dancing and starts to head for the refreshment table. "See, I needed to figure out how to handle it so I could make proper awakened animals. Unless you apply the soul stuff just right you don't get any self awareness."

[celtois]

David follows her to the drink stand. I..okay. So you think you could help me?

[Jacklu]

Crow waves to Ven from the dance floor. She is a chicken at the moment, so it might make recognizing her hard.

Hey Ven! I'm a chicken at the moment! Shake that groove thang!

[Terry576]

Ven sweatdrops. He stares at Crow, flushes and mutters something Crow probably can't hear about how he "can't dance".

[Reinholdt]

Reinholdt, the sniper kitty, walks in and takes a look around. He hasn't met too many of these people, so he'll go up to Kiara Rain and look up. "Hello there. I'm Reinholdt, Treasure Hunter Extraordinaire," he says with his flourish. "May I ask your name?"

[Ashen Lilies]

Yay! I is noticed! And, I'll just say it now, because it's been bugging me, but SWEATDROPS IS NOT A WORD! Thank you.

Kiara turns to the kitty kat kurrently krouching next to her. (I think I may adopt Free Hand's habit of turning Cs into Ks given my obsession with the letter. :smalltongue:)

Kiara Rain, On Vacation Extraordinaire.

[Terry576]

Ven resists the urge to ask Reinholdt if he knows Yuffie, Treasure Princess...

[Rebonack]

"Probably," Zee comments as she pours some punch for herself before offering a cup to the soul-hole guy. "If you want to stop by my shop tomorrow I can see about fixing you up. The Barkhouse Bestiary. Looks like a tree, hard to miss it. If you do just ask around. Most of the normal folk about the Nexus know where I live."

[Terry576]

OR IS IT?

Ven decides to pull an Avatar and fake he knows how to dance. He's doing pretty well at faking breakdancing.

[Reinholdt]

"Oh? A pleasure to meet you Kiara Rain. What are you on vacation from?" Reinholdt will hop up closer to her so she doesn't have to crouch or anything.

[celtois]

I'll drop by. See if you can..

[Ashen Lilies]

No. No it is not. You could say 'Ven sweats slightly,' or, 'Ven starts sweating.' But not 'Ven sweatdrops,' as it is an abuse of the English language, and causes 1d4 abuse of the English language every time I see it. :smallannoyed:
EVERY. TIME.
EVERY! SINGLE! TIME! OH GODS WHY?! WHY!? *head smash into the desk* *repeatedly*
*whimpers*

I'm an assassin.
Note of bitterness when she says that.

[Terry576]

((Headdesk isn't a word either. It cause 1d12 damage to the english language everytime it is use.))

[Rebonack]

"Fix that hole in your soul. You wouldn't believe how common missing soul bits is around the Nexus. Probably from the high per-capita concentration of succubus," Avatar shrugs, drinking her punch. At the moment she's watching several lawn gnomes break it down.

Go gnomes go!

Zee suddenly yells for no readily apparent reason, "SSHHH! I'm an assassin!"

[Ashen Lilies]

((I have no idea what you are talking about. >.>))

Kiara turns to Avatar.
Really? How interesting.

[Reinholdt]

"Oh." Reinholdt is a little shocked. Hence the change in subjects.

"So, uh, what made you decide to take your vacation here?"

[celtois]

David pulls out a amulet with a faintly glowing ruby shaped like a fang in it.
This is what caused a chunk of my should to be ripped off.

[Ashen Lilies]

"Good Taverns. Mostly for the alcohol. Though today I'm drining for enjoyment, rather than to forget."

[Terry576]

((LIES! Headdesk is not a word! Neither is sweatdrops. Or facepalm...))

[Jacklu]

Crow continues to do the chicken dance.

Do the Robot!

She shifts back human and starts to do the robot. Her outfit shifts into a pretty dorky looking robot suit, complete with colander helmet and silver tubing arms.

[Reinholdt]

"This area has good taverns? Huh. Could have fooled me a bit. Eh. Maybe it's just the company. The food and drink are usually pretty good if you only look at it from that standpoint."

"And enjoyment... is necessary if you have things to forget." Reinholdt looks away a bit, but returns his attention to Kiara quickly.

[Rebonack]

Avatar sticks her tongue out at the actual assassin before turning her attention back to David. Or more specifically his unfriendly looking pendant. She quirks a brow and tilts her head off to the side a bit. "What is it? What's it do?"

[celtois]

It is an amulet. :smallwink: As for what It does I'm not exactly sure..

[The Bushranger]

pop!

Dani teleports in, and looks around curiously...

[Rebonack]

"Aside from ripping out soul-pieces?" Zee ventures.

Well. He had mentioned that. It's somewhere to start at least. Also begs the question 'why is he still wearing it?'

The lawn gnomes are presently busying themselves creating a gnome tower. Looks pretty nifty, all those little wooden men stacked on top of one another.

[celtois]

It does that when it is used... All I know was that I was told it would help me when I'm in danger.

[Rebonack]

"I see..." Avatar muses cryptically as she eyes the pendant. "You should really consider getting rid of it then. Having to rely on something like that to keep you safe is really setting up for disaster."

She's a firm believer in not putting your trust in things that eat souls.

[Rutskarn]

The door opens, and a tall, slender figure walks in.

He's dressed in a thin, pressed ashen suit, put on over a black dress shirt. His head is entirely shaven, and the lights glint off it, reflecting the light up away from him. He has a thin nose, thin lips, and a pair of perfectly round opaque sunglasses over his eyes.

Strapped onto his back is a guitar.

The figure approaches the bar, quietly sitting down and scoping out the area.

[Ashen Lilies]

"This area has good taverns? Huh. Could have fooled me a bit. Eh. Maybe it's just the company. The food and drink are usually pretty good if you only look at it from that standpoint."

"And enjoyment... is necessary if you have things to forget." Reinholdt looks away a bit, but returns his attention to Kiara quickly.

"You say that as if you know from experience." :smallamused:

[Rutskarn]

Softly, the slender man begins to play the guitar, quiet notes dropping casually after one another.

"Well, now. The taverns can get a bit dull now and then. A lot of conversation, but...not much meaning, if you understand me. Just people, getting by."

[celtois]

It is the first time I've ever had to use it in 21 years. It does make a good precaution.. (It is a artifact level item.)

[Reinholdt]

"You say that as if you know from experience." :smallamused:
"Hmph. Perhaps. What of it?"

[Darkcomet]

DC walks in. Upon spotting Reinholdt, he takes a table far, far away from him and Kiara.