Just how good is memory? (question)

[Kaelaroth]

I'm watching a drama, on ITV, called Unforgiven.
Twelve years on, an eighteen year old perhaps doesn't remember her sister, who she was separated from when she was six.
Is it possible for a six year old, if not encouraged to remember, without given any contact, or something, could they forget, completely? Or are they too old for it, is it just glossing over of facts in TV?

[hamishspence]

apart from traumatic amnesia, I'm not sure how possible it is to completely forget a person known well in that period, a family member.

[Jack Squat]

I suppose it's possible...although on the contrary I still remember my teacher, a couple people who were in my class (I knew the people since then, but I mean I remember they were in my class) for as early as Kindergarden.

I also have some fleeting memories of PreSchool, but not really anything more than a few snippets. Same with my 3rd birthday. Of course, I may just be strange.

I think a better explination could have been that he's got some memories of having a sister, but not what she looked like or anything more than maybe a name.

[bluewind95]

I think it also depends on how important said sister was at the time. And also what happened to him after the separation. If life went on like he'd never had a sister, it's possible he would have mostly forgotten it. Just like the above poster said, it would be a case of "I think I had a sister once..."

If the guy had a fairly traumatic life, he may well have blocked the memories entirely. There's no real answer, each brain would deal with that in different ways.

[Stormthorn]

He states that its a girl and her sister, Bluewind. Yes! Two people in to days. Just call me the Genderator!

[thubby]

depends on the person. i don't remember many people from when i was six.

[valadil]

He probably remembers she exists, but doesn't have her on his mind all that often. If asked about siblings I know that I have one. If asked about cousins, I have to count them all. His sister is probably part of his distant past and not in immediate memory but accessible if he thinks about it.

For what it's worth I have a memory from when I was 3 months old. Our cat had died and I still have a distinct image of my dad digging a hole while I wondered why the cat wasn't around. My next memory was just before I turned 3 and they've been pretty steady since then. I'd say a 6 year old won't have lost too much. If you can name your kindergarten teacher (mine was Mrs. Cooperband) you can remember a family member you had at the same age.

[bluewind95]

He states that its a girl and her sister, Bluewind. Yes! Two people in to days. Just call me the Genderator!

Whoops! :smallredface:

I think I might not be sleeping well enough! :smalltongue:

[Alleine]

I can remember back from when I was 4. It was mostly just a very few things/people.
I would expect a 6 year old to remember a sister. Or at least that there was someone there. Although I just realized I really don't remember my siblings or parents from back when I was really young. I have some relatively more recent memories where they are indeed there, but I'm not sure how old I was in those memories :P

[bluewind95]

My earliest memory is from when I was 1 year old. But then again, it is a memory that I was very proud of having so I kept reinforcing it through the years. I remember more or less what I was thinking, my perception of the things around me and the general situation. It's kind of hazy now, but I still remember. And every time I remember that I remember, I relive it so that I can remember it longer.

[Quincunx]

Hold for a moment while I try to dredge up memories of children I never saw again once I turned six. . . .Nada. I can get individual moments of pre-school and kindergarten, but nothing particular to the kids who went to different elementary schools. I can deduce who the girl must be in two of those moments, but can't recall anything about her, particularly. Now, if I asked the same of my sister, she can probably tell you what she saw when she came to pick me up from pre-school, and she was two. Flip it around again, and ask what we were reading when we were six--I will bitterly compare my library books about The Big Red Ball to contemporary issues of National Geographic, and my sister will give you the blank look. Our different memories focus on different aspects, but I would be more disbelieving if a very social person claimed not to remember their lost sibling.

[OverdrivePrime]

I remember quite a lot from age 4 on, including several of my preschool and kindergarden classmates, which were less important in my life than my little sister. If she just disappeared at that time, I think I'd still remember her, particularly if there was any trauma associated with the loss.

However, as stated above, trauma can do some crazy things to the brain. Someone close to me had their memory edit out an aspect of their life centering on abuse by some family members. Decades later, the memories flooded back, but until then, she was entirely unaware of the missing memories and the events associated with them.

[Telonius]

Depends on how close the relationship is, and how often it's reinforced. I have no recollection whatsoever of my first grade teacher, and if I hadn't had evidence (pictures, family trees, etc) of a great-aunt who died that year, I wouldn't have remembered her either. Unless it's somebody who obviously must have existed (parents, grandparents), I would guess that the existence of a relative could reasonably have been hidden.

[Lupy]

If he wasn't encouraged to remember her he might have forgotten her entirely...

I can remember things from when I was under about 7 if they made a big mark on me, otherwise, not much.

I remember:
1 - The first time I saw a creek. I was standing on the bank and there was a four foot drop into the creek. I figured the creek was about 40 feet down and at least a mile across.
2 - When our dog had puppies my grandparents came up to help my mom and dad with me and the 11 puppies. It's the first time I remember my grandpa, he helped me feed one of the puppies with a bottle. I also remember playing with the puppies and my dad in the back yard, the puppies would all chase me and I though that if they caught me they would lick me. I saw my dad trimming hedges, and it was really weird, for some reason.
3 - Nothing except moving into our new house and my brother being born.
4 - Playing with my friends a few times, and there was a boy in my class named Tyler who had to walk to his house and let himself in every day, which I thought was cool, but my mom told me was sad. I also remember I started crying once and he was the first person to notice.
5 - A lot. From here on I remember a bunch of stuff.

So I would conclude that he should've remembered that he had a sister at least.

[Ashtar]

"A sister? No no, you created an imaginary friend." And a couple of years later, you don't remember anything.

A friend of mine had a twin who died when she was 4, she was brought up thinking she was an only child by her parents who wanted to "protect" her. She spent her childhood thinking she was crazy, talking to her imaginary sister... They told her while she was doing therapy at eighteen. Her parents had been told by a therapist that "it would be better that way...".

[ForzaFiori]

I have sporadic memory up to about...7th, 8th grade. However, I have had 10 or 11 concussions (I cannot remember how many, if that tells you anything). I can remember, for instance, that my kindergarten teachers name started with an A, but nothing else. I can remember a few people in the class, and I can tell you how to get to the classroom from the school, but thats about it for that grade. the only thing I remember about first grade though is that we learned some spanish because the teacher had a Hispanic husband. So its possible i would say.

[KerfuffleMach2]

As people have said, it all depends on the situation before and after her disappearance. And on the mind of the girl in question. Some people have bad memories, and can't remember people they knew for four years. It happens. Just depends on the situation.

So, yeah, it's entirely possible.

[Collin152]

I have vivid memories from when I was 4. I can remember people I never knew.
But then, my memories are funny things. I can remember some things perfectly, some things not at all, and I have a bit of a problem with the very short term memory.
So, it's not inconceivable, but it's not too believable to me.

[Mx.Silver]

I can recall people I haven't seen since I was 5, but then my memory tends to be above average. A friend is a bit of a different story than a sibling though, as (certainly until that age) you will have had more contact with your sibling than you would have with almost everyone else, so I'm a little sceptical about that plot development. I'm not saying it couldn't happend but it seems a bit unlikely.

[Player_Zero]

I can barely hang on to what happened yesterday, let alone when I was six.

[charl]

Probably possible. I can't remember stuff from when I was that age.

[Ceska]

I can barely hang on to what happened yesterday, let alone when I was six.
Very similar for me. I do have memories of that time, but most seem to be diluted by story telling from mostly my mother, which makes it hard to guess what my own were.
Those that weren't are as if the director of the film went on an acid trip, randomly decided to increase certain sounds, the colour value of some parts are increased grotesquely (like the grass in some short, moving clips, without any sound or interaction, being in bright streaks), no or comical faces and similar. I think my mind was just too bored with the real memories.

[Z-dan]

I have memories from before I was born :smalleek: well, apparently I do... in particular I remember a cockatiel we used to have called coco and apparently we did indeed have a cockatiel called coco but it was a couple of months before I was born... Other than that, I remember when my sister was living with us at about 5 or 6 but I don't think it would properly register that she was my sister- just a person that lived with us (then again she is 15 years older than me)... And my dad left when I was 6 and I remember the house he temporarily lived in

[Raiser Blade]

I have like one memory from when I was 4. Nothing earlier then that though.