Patethic commoner build

[weenie]

So I'm making a joke character, and he's going to be a lvl1 commoner. Now what I want is someone so poor mechanically and fluffwise, that no one would ever wish to play, but who's sum of ability modifier bonuses is at least +2.

Any ideas?

[Gorbash]

Play a Samurai. That's a real joke character while STILL bineg a core PC class.

[BRC]

The Build, 6th level commoner with a Horse (one rank in ride), a Lance (No Proficiency) and Armor (no proficency). Low wis, but Leadership for a high-wis commoner cohort with a Donkey.
The Character claims they are a Knight 4/Ranger 2, with Favored Enemy: Giants.

[Myou]

If you're making a Commoner 1 what more do you need to do? Just pick a feat that sucks and you're done.

[Justyn]

The Build, 6th level commoner with a Horse (one rank in ride), a Lance (No Proficiency) and Armor (no proficency). Low wis, but Leadership for a high-wis commoner cohort with a Donkey.
The Character claims they are a Knight 4/Ranger 2, with Favored Enemy: Giants.

I see what you did there.

[weenie]

The Build, 6th level commoner with a Horse (one rank in ride), a Lance (No Proficiency) and Armor (no proficency). Low wis, but Leadership for a high-wis commoner cohort with a Donkey.
The Character claims they are a Knight 4/Ranger 2, with Favored Enemy: Giants.

This one is epic! Unfortunately the build must be lvl1..

[chiasaur11]

Ah, but remember the Anti windmill bonuses.

Very useful feature.

[Kroy]

Max out Craft (Baskets), Profession (Basket Weaving), and get Skill Focus.

[AmberVael]

Any commoner build must include the chicken infested flaw, just because it adds hilarity.

Also, a good way to go would be to push your strength as low as possible, then wield a diminutive whip.

For one thing, this will mean you have a massive penalty to attack (-4 for non proficiency, -6 for size difference) and can only deal nonlethal damage to people without armor.
Oh, and what is more, you deal no damage even if you find someone that you can hit with that massive penalty AND doesn't have armor. Because the whip is that small.

This also assumes you can manage to get out your weapon in the first place, as the Chicken Infested flaw will make you have a chance to pull a chicken out instead. Though actually you might even be better off using the chicken against people- even a -4 improvised penalty and low damage would be more than the literal nothing your whip could do.

So that's my proposal. Gob the chicken herder! He'll whip those chickens into shape, and don't make him angry, or...
...er...
He'll throw chickens at you!

[Dogmantra]

KEvin is a well wcked lev 1 commonor that kills peepulz!
he killz ThEm ReAlLy WeLl! LOL!

backstorie: 1 day kevin was walking and he thoguht lets kill sum peeple so he went and killed sum peeple and then he was arrested but it was ok bcuz he excaped prison and killed the gaurds and then he thought im goin to b adventuror so he became an adventuror.
dis is his sheet! http://www.myth-weavers.com/sheetview.php?sheetid=118903



Okay... with that out of the way. I dare you to give that to your DM, backstory and all... on a hand-drawn character sheet. If you want a normal character with no juvenile typing then I'm afraid I can't help you. Anyone want to volunteer for an epic game with this character?

[TheCountAlucard]

Play a Samurai. That's a real joke character while STILL bineg a core PC class.

Err, no, it's not. It's not in any of the three core books.

[Myatar_Panwar]

Err, no, it's not. It's not in any of the three core books.

You know what he meant. Seriously dude. :smallconfused:

Anyway, it shouldn't be too hard to just pick commoner, and add skill focus: Basket Weaving or whatever. Add half-elf to really push the idea. :smalltongue:

[Yahzi]

This one is epic! Unfortunately the build must be lvl1..
Well, really, it works just as well at level 1.. you can still claim to be a 4th Knight / 2nd Ranger.

[The Deej]

The Build, 6th level commoner with a Horse (one rank in ride), a Lance (No Proficiency) and Armor (no proficency). Low wis, but Leadership for a high-wis commoner cohort with a Donkey.
The Character claims they are a Knight 4/Ranger 2, with Favored Enemy: Giants.

I must also agree that this is awesome.


Max out Craft (Baskets), Profession (Basket Weaving), and get Skill Focus.

better make that: Profession (Underwater Basket weaving)

[Telonius]

If the +2 needs to be before modification, I think this would be pretty wretched.

Venerable Half-orc commoner 1

Starting Stats:
Str 10
Dex 12
Con 10
Int 10
Wis 10
Cha 12

Flaw: Frail
Flaw: Pathetic (Str)
Feat: Quicken Spell
Feat: Spell Penetration
Feat: Spell Focus (Evocation)

After adjustment:
Str 4
Dex 6
Con 4
Int 11
Wis 13
Cha 11

Light Load: 13 lb
Weapon proficiency: Spiked Gauntlet
AC: 8
Starting HP: 3 (assuming full d4, -1 for Frail)

Reflex Save: -2
Will Save: +1
Fort Save: -3

Melee: -3
Damage: d4-3
Ranged: -2 (nonproficiency = -6)


Even if this poor sucker multiclasses out of Commoner, he's pretty much useless.

[Tengu_temp]

The Build, 6th level commoner with a Horse (one rank in ride), a Lance (No Proficiency) and Armor (no proficency). Low wis, but Leadership for a high-wis commoner cohort with a Donkey.
The Character claims they are a Knight 4/Ranger 2, with Favored Enemy: Giants.

The problem here is that aristocrat would be a better fit, but aristocrats are proficient in all armor and martial weapons.