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Eon
2009-05-17, 03:14 PM
Give me a scenario where in that there is a something in a room and what happens!
make it appropriate.

SurlySeraph
2009-05-17, 03:34 PM
It's an ogre. She's cooking dinner, oblivious to your presence. Making noise reveals that she's deaf.
Further inspection of the room reveals a cradle in the corner, containing a semi-adorable baby ogre.
Further inspection of the cooking pot reveals a human torso.
What's the moral course of action?

Eon
2009-05-17, 03:42 PM
hmmm, thats a tough one... Give the ogre some seasonings and leave

theMycon
2009-05-17, 07:55 PM
It depends, does your character speak OSL (Ogrish-sign-language)?

Also, does your church take kindly to cross-species adoptions?

Glyde
2009-05-17, 07:57 PM
Sneak attack

Colmarr
2009-05-17, 08:00 PM
I suspect this will be moved shortly.

theMycon
2009-05-17, 08:05 PM
Edit to my last reply- After you season the meat, a heal check reveals that this is a shaved lycanthrope. She's eating an _evil_ human.

Faleldir
2009-05-17, 08:22 PM
Yeah, I have to go with TheMycon on that one. Kill the mother and give the baby to a Good-aligned family.

Devils_Advocate
2009-05-17, 08:29 PM
But if humans are allowed to eat chickens, surely other species are allowed to eat humans.

Otherwise they're just picking on the chickens!

chiasaur11
2009-05-17, 08:35 PM
No Orc with a pie?

I am disappointed.

kirbsys
2009-05-17, 10:36 PM
Chain lightening the both of them then eat the stew yourself.

Ellye
2009-05-17, 10:55 PM
When a NPC kills something to feed her baby she's obvious eeeeeevil.
When the PCs kill said NPC and take away her baby to brainwash it with their own morality they are glorious being of pure goodness.
Everyone knows that.

Xuincherguixe
2009-05-17, 11:09 PM
There's a heart beating in the center of the room. The ceiling slowly starts to lower.

Lycanthromancer
2009-05-17, 11:28 PM
There's a heart beating in the center of the room. The ceiling slowly starts to lower.

It's a heart...attack?

Just beat it.

TheDon
2009-05-18, 01:28 AM
But if humans are allowed to eat chickens, surely other species are allowed to eat humans.

One thing I've learned from Schlock Mercenary, "Food that talks isn't food"

That's why ogres are evil, I'll have to second Glyde's Motion

Farlion
2009-05-18, 02:23 AM
"Food that talks isn't food"

Just because you don't understand chickens, doesn't mean they don't talk!

Cheers,
Farlion

DragoonWraith
2009-05-18, 02:25 AM
Just because you don't understand chickens, doesn't mean they don't talk!

Cheers,
Farlion
No, but our knowledge of their brain capacity (in a world without magic) is quite conclusive that chickens lack the capability of processing language.

Drider
2009-05-18, 03:12 AM
There is a long hall filled with arrow traps, and the ranger sends their bear animal companion down to absorb the traps. The bear dies to an arrow that hits critically, the ranger complains, demanding a new bear.


In the room, there is a panda, with it's baby, and it sneezes.

Coidzor
2009-05-18, 03:33 AM
See how much more delicious the adorableness makes them. :smallamused:

Farlion
2009-05-18, 03:50 AM
No, but our knowledge of their brain capacity (in a world without magic) is quite conclusive that chickens lack the capability of processing language.

It's probably more the lack of the speech aparatus, rather than lack of brain. Monkeys would be capabale of speech, but they lack the proper aparatus to talk. So they have to use sign-language. ;-D

On topic:

There's also a chest. It's not locked! What could be in it?

hewhosaysfish
2009-05-18, 07:29 AM
You should fry yourself in garlic butter and feed yourself to the baby, or else you're being ethnocentric and racist.

Flickerdart
2009-05-18, 07:51 AM
There's also a chest. It's not locked! What could be in it?
Mimic. And the ceiling is a Lurker Above, the floor is a Trapper and the walls are lined with Stunjellies. Why yes, you are in the Tomb of Horrors.

Berserk Monk
2009-05-18, 07:53 AM
Gazebo:smallbiggrin:

Shademan
2009-05-18, 07:53 AM
no no no! the room is filled with orcs dancing riverdance!
IN KILTS!
they want the pc's to join in!

Faleldir
2009-05-18, 07:56 AM
Mimic. And the ceiling is a Lurker Above, the floor is a Trapper and the walls are lined with Stunjellies. Why yes, you are in the Tomb of Horrors.

At least the air isn't a Gelatinous Cube.

Flickerdart
2009-05-18, 08:02 AM
At least the air isn't a Gelatinous Cube.
It is, you don't live long enough to make the Spot check.

Tsotha-lanti
2009-05-18, 09:03 AM
No Orc with a pie?

I am disappointed.

Me too.

It's (http://www.montecook.com/cgi-bin/page.cgi?otherd20_orcandpie) the only adventure that can be printed entirely on a t-shirt.

theMycon
2009-05-18, 10:30 AM
You should fry yourself in garlic butter and feed yourself to the baby, or else you're being ethnocentric and racist.

You'd be amazed how often I get that.

Zhalath
2009-05-18, 07:48 PM
To the ogre situation, I don't understand why it's eating a human. Humans aren't really good meat. There are other things that can eaten for meat that are either more meaty or easier to catch. Therefore, this ogre was being a real jerk when she killed the lycanthrope, if she's feeding it to her young. I'll just keep walking, though. I doubt the mother has any good treasure on her (spent it on the pot).

To the room full of death, I have contingency greater teleport.

I'd like to shoot the Riverdancing orcs, unless they succeed on a DC 30 Perform check, in which case, I give them 5 gp.

Fireball the gazebo.


You should fry yourself in garlic butter and feed yourself to the baby, or else you're being ethnocentric and racist.

I want to put this in my signature.

Flickerdart
2009-05-18, 07:59 PM
To the room full of death, I have contingency greater teleport.
Contingency on what, "find a monster"? Besides, this is the Tomb of Horrors. Travel through the Etheral plane (such as with a Teleport) brings to bear monsters more powerful than those you face on the Material. They kill you and then you die.

Jack_Simth
2009-05-18, 08:16 PM
To the room full of death, I have contingency greater teleport.
You'll need either Craft Contingent Spell, a custom Contingency spell, a lower-level spell than Greater Teleport - Contingency caps at 6th level spells.

Zhalath
2009-05-18, 08:34 PM
Contingency on what, "find a monster"? Besides, this is the Tomb of Horrors. Travel through the Etheral plane (such as with a Teleport) brings to bear monsters more powerful than those you face on the Material. They kill you and then you die.


You'll need either Craft Contingent Spell, a custom Contingency spell, a lower-level spell than Greater Teleport - Contingency caps at 6th level spells.

...I'll find a way! Somehow! I'm not walking any farther into that room!

For the panda bears, I domesticate it, and ride it off into the sunset.

Justin B.
2009-05-18, 08:42 PM
Consuming sentient beings is generally considered evil, however, for all you know this human had walked into her lair seeking treasure and she had then killed him, and not having the same moral stigmas about eating sentient beings, cooked him up.

Detect Evil on the Mother and the Baby. Act accordingly from there.

Juggernaut1981
2009-05-18, 08:55 PM
You see a pedestal standing at the other end of the room decorated with bones and skull designs. Upon the pedestal appears to be the preserved head of a mummy with a crown on top. Above the pedestal is the Holy Symbol of Vecna roughly 10'x10' on the wall. The head has a crown on top of it. The rest of the room appears to be empty.

Could this be... the HEAD OF VECNA??? (DUM DUM DUMMMMMMM)


[please insert Gygax style traps across the entire floor between the door and the pedestal, oh and the pedestal and crown are both trapped... at least one of them turns you to stone and the other disintegrates you]

Olo Demonsbane
2009-05-18, 11:16 PM
*mage hand* I sell it too the next adventurer I come across by using Glibness.


And in the room there is a mirror. When you look at it, it looks like you are wearing sunglasses :smallcool:

John Campbell
2009-05-18, 11:39 PM
But if humans are allowed to eat chickens, surely other species are allowed to eat humans.

As my half-orc ranger once told the elven rogue: "Not cannibalism if not same species."

Of course, he also thinks that cannibalism is not merely acceptable, but the right and proper way to honor a respected foe.


Otherwise they're just picking on the chickens!

I've met chickens. I'm so not believing that they're "food that talks". "Food that tastes good with honey mustard," maybe.

Xuincherguixe
2009-05-19, 05:52 AM
It's a heart...attack?

Just beat it.

I know you were just making a bad pun, but here's the reveal anyways.

It turns out that it was an elaborate, localized spatial warping. It turns out that it's really one of the PCs hearts. You just killed someone. Possibly yourself.

... Yeah. I'm evil. I've got a lot of these.

Jack_Simth
2009-05-19, 06:28 AM
Contingency on what, "find a monster"? Besides, this is the Tomb of Horrors. Travel through the Etheral plane (such as with a Teleport) brings to bear monsters more powerful than those you face on the Material. They kill you and then you die.
Teleport and related go through the Astral, not the Ethereal.


I know you were just making a bad pun, but here's the reveal anyways.

It turns out that it was an elaborate, localized spatial warping. It turns out that it's really one of the PCs hearts. You just killed someone. Possibly yourself.

... Yeah. I'm evil. I've got a lot of these.
That's more "effectively arbitrary PC death" - which, while related to "evil", isn't the "good" kind of evil that leaves you the DM and entertains your friends, so much as the "bad" kind of evil that makes the players go elsewhere for their D&D fix, ending your campaign.

Coidzor
2009-05-19, 07:14 AM
You find a penguin on top of some kind of strange chest whose contents change and emit noise and light in the form of pictures and are visible through a glass wall of the chest.

bosssmiley
2009-05-19, 08:01 AM
You find a penguin on top of some kind of strange chest whose contents change and emit noise and light in the form of pictures and are visible through a glass wall of the chest.

Cast protection from Linux. Check for Shoggoths.

Zhalath
2009-05-19, 06:33 PM
@penguin: that chest looks sellable. I'll handle penguin and then take the box, and sell it as a "random magic box".

@ head of Vecna: I'm taking it, via levitation from above and telekinesis

New scenario (because we totally need more): you enter the room, and you see an orc bard sitting on a chair, trying to play a lute. He is surrounded by a crowd of dead and mutilated corpses, all on chairs.

Xuincherguixe
2009-05-19, 06:40 PM
Teleport and related go through the Astral, not the Ethereal.


That's more "effectively arbitrary PC death" - which, while related to "evil", isn't the "good" kind of evil that leaves you the DM and entertains your friends, so much as the "bad" kind of evil that makes the players go elsewhere for their D&D fix, ending your campaign.


Eh, not so much. No one told the PCs they had to shoot the thing. It's not a very good idea to just start smashing things with no idea what they do. If you see a lever in the middle of the room, would you just pull it?

It's the same principle.

potatocubed
2009-05-20, 01:32 AM
A burning man who dispenses cryptic advice.

A strangely scented gas that causes massive hallucinations (and Wis damage).

A gelatinous cube, stained black so the monsters can see it coming.

Twenty-six stuffed (taxidermied) animals on pedestals, mouldy. 1-in-6 of them is filled with blast spores due to improper cleaning. Add animate objects for instant fun.

A severed head, mostly fresh. Inside the skull case is a vital clue.

The PCs' real employer, bound and gagged. He's been here for months - so who's been sending them on quests, and why?

shadzar
2009-05-20, 05:16 AM
There is nothing visibly in the room, and nothing happens because the party moves on.

Being not the first empty room the party has found they decide to not waste time on it, but this one actually has an illusion on it along with invisibility, silence from objects placed in the walls and is really a treasure cache guarded by an infestation of vermin that is bound to stay inside the room.

The objects imparting the illusion of an empty dusty room and the invisibility on the items takes 2 hours to fully manifest so the vermin can see things entering the room in plenty of time to attack and enjoy a fresh meal should anything clumsily just enter the room.

Also any bloodsoaked maws and teeth or other items in the room will show the silhouette of the blood on things should something enter the room and be there less than the 2 hours for the object to enable their magics upon them, given info about how things are moving around in the room prior to any splattered blood or other things less than 2 hours old to the room would reveal that something is in the room.

However it will not immediately remove the illusion even if the invisibility is removed, so any trap in the room like an open pit in the floor may still seem to be normal fixture or the room such a the floor even after the invisibility is disbelieved to reveal the items covered in blood.

So the only thing to remain constant until removed in the room would be the item causing silence in it.

:smallbiggrin:

Levyathyn
2009-05-21, 12:14 AM
In the very center of the room, in a large, elaborately etched circle with absolutely no reason to be there or magical purpose whatsoever is an item that randomly becomes a new item every single second exactly. The item can be anything of any size and complexity; Every variable about the item, including symmetry, size, detail, color, shape, composition, magical and physical properties, weight, and density are randomly mixed from moment to moment. The only certain thing about the object is that it suffers from inertia; Unless something moves it or it manages to move itself by turning into something with that ability, it will remain on the floor in this room.

Barring divine or infernal intervention, how long until the world is destroyed?

::The above is a riddle asked of one of my PC's by a meddlesome god.

BloodyAngel
2009-05-21, 03:52 AM
You enter a room... three scantily clad women are standing before you. One is dressed in black... one in red... one in white. Each extends a hand, and says "Choose me and be rewarded" What do you do? (Dun dun dun!!!!)

Alternately, you enter a room made entirely of polished white marble. The center is carved in runes that glowing with powerful magical energy... In the center of a circle of these runes, an ornate great sword stands, thrust into the stone floor. Similar runes run down it's polished blade, and it seems to be made of a curious, black metal. (Adamantite?) What do you do?

FMArthur
2009-05-21, 05:31 AM
I feel that this is an appropriate puzzle. (http://xkcd.com/246/)

TSED
2009-05-21, 05:42 AM
Two mirrors, afixed directly across from eachother.

When you move in them, the fractal reflections of yourself do not follow your actions. They instead begin to act freely, their action further removed the smaller it is.

Levyathyn
2009-05-21, 04:17 PM
You enter a room... three scantily clad women are standing before you. One is dressed in black... one in red... one in white. Each extends a hand, and says "Choose me and be rewarded" What do you do? (Dun dun dun!!!!)

Alternately, you enter a room made entirely of polished white marble. The center is carved in runes that glowing with powerful magical energy... In the center of a circle of these runes, an ornate great sword stands, thrust into the stone floor. Similar runes run down it's polished blade, and it seems to be made of a curious, black metal. (Adamantite?) What do you do?

I can answer the first one. No one said I couldn't, so I'd pick all three and live happily ever after. Although, if this is Lancian, I'd pick red.

As for the sword...curiousity would probably get the better of me, and I'd attempt to draw it.

Coidzor
2009-05-21, 06:15 PM
You enter a room... three scantily clad women are standing before you. One is dressed in black... one in red... one in white. Each extends a hand, and says "Choose me and be rewarded" What do you do? (Dun dun dun!!!!)

Give them each a six-sided die and have them roll for who gets to pick two numbers off of a six-sided die to simulate a three-sided die. Then roll the six-sided die and kill the one that wins, then repeat for the remaining two.

By then, I think one scantily clad woman should be easily dispatched if I'm able to trick her out of having her allies in the fight, even if she is a higher-level sorceress than I am of whatever class I am...


...There is a small doll sitting in a doll sized chair, staring at the door that you enter through, and no matter where in the room you go, one of her eyes, which is broken and cannot be closed, seems to follow you... After 1d4 rounds of ignoring the doll, it will appear to have moved in such a way as to be following the party member with the lowest wisdom/charisma (roll d% 50-50 to determine which stat she latches on to)

TheCountAlucard
2009-05-21, 06:19 PM
...There are two Pelors, and they both look pretty pissed at you.

The Rose Dragon
2009-05-21, 06:24 PM
There is a gazebo in the middle of the room.

What do you do?

Juggernaut1981
2009-05-21, 07:22 PM
@ Zalath
Time to reveal one of my preferred "I want to see who doesn't pay attention to things" traps...

[Insert object here] looks incredible valuable, probably ancient... it gives you those "artefact of immense power" vibes... and its standing on a pedestal at the other end of a room...

PC assumptions: Floor will have more traps than the Tomb of Horrors... But if I FLY... then I'll be safe... then use mage hand to pick it up...

[insert action sequence with flying wizard lifting object with spell]

Then the door slams closed and you stare at your magic items and then realise that the floor is getting close... FAST... and why is there the sound of rushing water???? [insert antimagic area + lots of water triggered by you lifting the object]


It's SOOOOO Indiana Jones, but D&D players get too smart for themselves sometimes... Trapping the floor is for DM's who don't want to play with subjective gravity (like setting up a subjective gravity spell on the wall and an illusion down the hallway... watch that fighter charge and SLAM the wall)... or antimagic.

TSED
2009-05-21, 07:37 PM
There is a gazebo in the middle of the room.

What do you do?

Ragequit because the DM gave us a TOTALLY level inappropriate encounter and it was a TOTAL **** MOVE.

woodenbandman
2009-05-21, 07:43 PM
There are thousands and thousands of rocks of all shapes and sizes, at the bottom of a 30 foot drop. You jump down, and the rocks all explode into dust.

Tiki Snakes
2009-05-21, 07:44 PM
You enter a room... three scantily clad women are standing before you. One is dressed in black... one in red... one in white. Each extends a hand, and says "Choose me and be rewarded" What do you do? (Dun dun dun!!!!)

Alternately, you enter a room made entirely of polished white marble. The center is carved in runes that glowing with powerful magical energy... In the center of a circle of these runes, an ornate great sword stands, thrust into the stone floor. Similar runes run down it's polished blade, and it seems to be made of a curious, black metal. (Adamantite?) What do you do?

Kill them. Kill them all.

Preferably with lots of fire.

Levyathyn
2009-05-21, 08:24 PM
Ragequit

New word added to my vocbulary. Thank you.