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Midnight Son
2009-06-11, 06:45 AM
Eventually (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31208155/)...maybe.

I saw this on the news this morning. The reporter started the presentation with, "The Earth may collide with Venus. The good news is there's only a 1/2500 chance. The really good news is that if it happens, it won't be for 3.5 billion years."

Whew! She had me all worried there for a bit.

My question; why do news agencies think this sort of thing is breaking, must report news? I see these fairly often. Is there a purpose? My supposition is that, in 3.5 billion years, when this goes down, NBC can be all, "See. We told you so. But no one would listen..."

unstattedCommoner
2009-06-11, 06:47 AM
My question; why do news agencies think this sort of thing is breaking, must report news?

Because there is insufficient actual "breaking, must report news" to fill a full 24-hour "breaking, must report news" channel.

The Dark Fiddler
2009-06-11, 06:49 AM
Because it gets them ratings, and if both Venus and Earth speed up proportionally equally, then maybe we'll collide sooner, and then they can say "We warned you it'd happen. We were wrong about the time, but we said it'd happen!"

billtodamax
2009-06-11, 06:52 AM
Slow news day. Besides, some of us want to know what's going to happen in 3.5b years time. :smalltongue:

DigoDragon
2009-06-11, 06:58 AM
...and they don't take into account the kind of technology we'll have 3.5 billion years that might prevent this. That is, if we're even still *HERE*
By then we could have left the old Earth for another system with dozens of worlds and hundreds of moons to colonize. :smallbiggrin:

Tempest Fennac
2009-06-11, 07:03 AM
I know what you mean Digo. Looking at how much technology has advanced over the last 100 years, there's a good chance that space travel will improve to the point where we don't need this planet anymore. It would be interresting to see what it would be like once we're gone (I'll have to look up an old TV series called The Future is Wild later on).

Nameless
2009-06-11, 07:06 AM
Yay, we're all going to die!

*Breaks shop windows*

Linkavitch
2009-06-11, 08:41 AM
This reminds me of a dream I had, where Earth actually did collide with Mars. Surprisingly, I didn't die, and much of the Earth actually remained intact. Meh, just goes to show how unrealistic my dreams are.

OverdrivePrime
2009-06-11, 09:10 AM
Like a cosmic fender-bender? The Alps get a bit crumpled, but nothing other than cosmetic damage? That's a pretty awesome dream actually.:smallbiggrin:

Supagoof
2009-06-11, 09:36 AM
Don't worry. I'll take page from my buddy Superman's book and fly around the earth a bunch of times when that comes close to happening amd make everything allright. Us "Supes" help each other out like that. :smallamused:

Er wait, that will just delay the inevitable then. :smalleek: Ah well, I got 3.499 billion years to figure it out. :smallbiggrin:

Trog
2009-06-11, 11:02 AM
*Starts selling Earth Collision Insurance*

Midnight Son
2009-06-11, 04:09 PM
...and they don't take into account the kind of technology we'll have 3.5 billion years that might prevent this. That is, if we're even still *HERE*
By then we could have left the old Earth for another system with dozens of worlds and hundreds of moons to colonize. :smallbiggrin:
I feel sorry for the poor Venusian colonists. They leave old earth for a better life elsewhere and what happens? Elsewhere sends them right back to earth.

Muz
2009-06-11, 04:14 PM
"Despite its diminutive size, Mercury poses the greatest risk to the solar system's order."

Ladies and gentlemen, our path is clear. We must invade Mercury!!! :smallamused:

chiasaur11
2009-06-11, 04:48 PM
Ladies and gentlemen, our path is clear. We must invade Mercury!!! :smallamused:

Nuke it from orbit.

Only way to be sure.

Rutskarn
2009-06-11, 05:01 PM
My question; why do news agencies think this sort of thing is breaking, must report news? I see these fairly often. Is there a purpose? My supposition is that, in 3.5 billion years, when this goes down, NBC can be all, "See. We told you so. But no one would listen..."

If our civilization is civilized enough to survive for 3.5 billion years, then I imagine our current news media will no longer be around. Except in museums, ones that you must be 18 or older to enter due to the horrors within.

Logalmier
2009-06-11, 05:08 PM
If our civilization is civilized enough to survive for 3.5 billion years, then I imagine our current news media will no longer be around. Except in museums, ones that you must be 18 or older to enter due to the horrors within.

"We are not liable for any brain damage or heart attacks caused by the unbearable lies, stupidity, and soundbites this room contains. Entering this room may change your views of past generations. And no, we're not talking about the Greatest Generation. This is something we like to call 'the Stupid generation.' Children under 18 are not allowed entry to this room."

Dallas-Dakota
2009-06-11, 05:15 PM
By then, I'm sure, the trylobites will have been the main species on earth for a couple of hundred million or or couple of billion years again.




Unless we can involve in a way that stupid people die or can't have any children...

Oregano
2009-06-11, 05:18 PM
It's because if they didn't tell us we'd all forget and then in 3.5 billion years we'd be like "ohh yehhh, totally forgot about that".

TheThan
2009-06-11, 05:23 PM
So where are the amazon warriors from Venus that want to breed a new race?


:smallfrown: Disappointment abounds :smallfrown:

Muz
2009-06-11, 05:23 PM
No kidding. I'd better write this down now!


To do list:
Buy milk
Defrag hard drive
Evacuate planet
Re-pot cactus

Bor the Barbarian Monk
2009-06-11, 06:02 PM
Nuke it from orbit.

Only way to be sure.
Did you have to Alienate us like that? :smalltongue:

Mr. Mud
2009-06-11, 06:08 PM
No kidding. I'd better write this down now!


To do list:
Buy milk
Defrag hard drive
Evacuate planet
Re-pot cactus

Mine is something like:



Change Cat's Litter
Hide Folder "C:\Users\Joe\Desktop\Montage of Animals and Kittens"
Finish Box of Captain Crunch: Crunch Berries.
Sleep
(maybe) Wakeup?


:smalltongue:

V'icternus
2009-06-11, 06:16 PM
Did you have to Alienate us like that? :smalltongue:

We mostly bomb at night. Mostly.

Let the punning begin...

Flame of Anor
2009-06-11, 09:35 PM
By then we could have left the old Earth for another system with dozens of worlds and hundreds of moons to colonize. :smallbiggrin:

"Earth-that-was could no longer support our numbers, we were so many..."

Come on, someone set me up for an Aliens pun. :smallwink:

Wraithy
2009-06-12, 07:13 AM
Naaa, it'll all work out fine... at least, it did in Invader Zim.

Yarram
2009-06-12, 09:35 AM
*Starts selling Earth Collision Insurance*

Isn't the point to sell insurance to people that *aren't* going to need it?

SilverSheriff
2009-06-12, 09:46 AM
By then, I'm sure, the trylobites will have been the main species on earth for a couple of hundred million or or couple of billion years again.




Unless we can involve in a way that stupid people die or can't have any children...

I here-by dub you World Monarch.

Trog
2009-06-12, 10:31 AM
Isn't the point to sell insurance to people that *aren't* going to need it?
You really think you're going to live that long? :smalltongue:

Kroy
2009-06-12, 11:12 AM
"We are not liable for any brain damage or heart attacks caused by the unbearable lies, stupidity, and soundbites this room contains. Entering this room may change your views of past generations. And no, we're not talking about the Greatest Generation. This is something we like to call 'the Stupid generation.' Children under 18 are not allowed entry to this room."

Come on, he's just a dumb kid from the stupid ages.
-Leela, Futurama, December 31st, 2999

I don't know, the quote kinda fits.

DigoDragon
2009-06-12, 03:00 PM
I'll have to look up an old TV series called The Future is Wild later on.

That's a good series! I really enjoyed the immaginative creation in that show, though I felt bad for the mammalian family as a whole. Another one for a more immediate effect of when we're gone is "Life After People".

Decoy Lockbox
2009-06-12, 04:32 PM
Eventually (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/31208155/)...maybe.

I saw this on the news this morning. The reporter started the presentation with, "The Earth may collide with Venus. The good news is there's only a 1/2500 chance. The really good news is that if it happens, it won't be for 3.5 billion years."

Whew! She had me all worried there for a bit.

My question; why do news agencies think this sort of thing is breaking, must report news? I see these fairly often. Is there a purpose? My supposition is that, in 3.5 billion years, when this goes down, NBC can be all, "See. We told you so. But no one would listen..."

1) People are stupid
2) Tv channels make money off of ads
2a) Ad people make money off of corporations who hire them
2b) Corporations make money when the ads get you to buy their product
3) Tv channels need to get people to watch those ads, and people are stupid
4) Put things on tv that would frighten/alarm/intrigue stupid people*
5) Profit.


Step 4 is where the "breaking news" comes in. Breaking news! Paris Hilton said something! OMG! Must watch! Hey, a new gillette 15-blade razor...

Midnight Son
2009-06-12, 07:00 PM
Step 4 is where the "breaking news" comes in. Breaking news! Paris Hilton said something! OMG! Must watch! Hey, a new gillette 15-blade razor...
What a relief! My 14-blader just broke!

Warpfire
2009-06-16, 01:07 AM
You used a razor with only 14 blades?

Damn, man, why don't you just use a rusty shiv?

Thajocoth
2009-06-16, 04:43 AM
I think with the habitable zone slowly moving away from the sun anyway as the star ages that we have enough to worry about. Same for when the sun finally dies. And then arranging for it's cremation... But hey, that's why we're here, right? To see these problems billions of years in advance and solve them.

Also, the discussion of razor blade quantities reminds me of this. (http://biggercheese.com/index.php?comic=383)

Bor the Barbarian Monk
2009-06-16, 04:18 PM
What's that? We're discussing grooming for the end of the world? It's a good thing Spishak came out with its Mach 20! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4F7TMlrDXtw) :smallbiggrin:

FoE
2009-06-16, 05:22 PM
In defence of my fellow newspeople:

Having read it, there's nothing wrong with this article. It isn't alarmist in any way and it appropriately downplays the likelihood of Earth colliding with Venus.

The meat of the story is "Computer simulations expand our knowledge of solar system well into the future". But that makes for a boring lead, honestly, and isn't likely to convince many folks to stop and actually read the story while surfing the Internet. They'd rather read about INSERT CELEBRITY NAME HERE's recent arrest/visit to rehab/antics on set.

The "Earth may collide with Venus ... eventually" lead is only there to hook you into reading the article. News is meant to be read.

Besides, it is interesting. Prior to reading that, I didn't know there was even a possibility of planets within our solar system colliding; I thought that was just extremely silly science fiction, on the same level as Death Stars or phasers.

Now I know. And knowing is half the battle!

CrimsonAngel
2009-06-16, 05:43 PM
*breaks windows and steals from shops.*

"what are you DOING!"

"The world is ending."

"OH MY GOD!!!"

"Just not now."

"What?"

"we'll all die in 3.5 billion years."

"To the bomb shelter!"

"how long will the suplies last?"

"15 monthes."

ondonaflash
2009-06-16, 06:00 PM
Note: We should have been colonizing other planets by the time our global population got so large they had to limit birthing. We're too centralized as it is! One nuclear war and our race is gone. Its a serious problem! At least if we have a few colonies we can guarantee our race will perpetuate, and if we develop like, a thousand colonies? We can become unkillable! (As a race, not, you know, individually.)

Shraik
2009-06-16, 08:23 PM
By then, I'm sure, the trylobites will have been the main species on earth for a couple of hundred million or or couple of billion years again.




Unless we can involve in a way that stupid people die or can't have any children...

Just get rid of warning signs. The people stupid enough to roundhouse kick the vending machines, piss on electric wires, and stand on airport conveyor belts will get what comes to em

Midnight Son
2009-06-17, 05:38 AM
In defence of my fellow newspeople:

Having read it, there's nothing wrong with this article. It isn't alarmist in any way and it appropriately downplays the likelihood of Earth colliding with Venus.

The meat of the story is "Computer simulations expand our knowledge of solar system well into the future". But that makes for a boring lead, honestly, and isn't likely to convince many folks to stop and actually read the story while surfing the Internet. They'd rather read about INSERT CELEBRITY NAME HERE's recent arrest/visit to rehab/antics on set.

The "Earth may collide with Venus ... eventually" lead is only there to hook you into reading the article. News is meant to be read.

Besides, it is interesting. Prior to reading that, I didn't know there was even a possibility of planets within our solar system colliding; I thought that was just extremely silly science fiction, on the same level as Death Stars or phasers.

Now I know. And knowing is half the battle!You're defending the wrong newspeople. I first heard of this from TV, where the whole story was just about what I printed in the OP. The article was fine, but was never mentioned on the TV. It was either an attempt to drum up watchers with an alarmist statement, or purely fluff of the Who-gives-a-crap kind.