Senatus Populus que Tyrannus: A Military themed Oots style webcomic

[Raenir Salazar]

Hi! My first strip of Official Webcomic project #1 this is a webcomic set in my homebrew setting, name to still be considered but my working title is "Tagnik'Zur" until further notice, its military D&D themed with elements of wargaming thrown in for good measure and is largely going to be the tool I use to help myself flesh out the backstory of the setting.

The first comic is in homage to Red vs Blue's first episode but will go on its own path right after its purpose is to show the contrast between Private Qin (pronounced as "Quin" ) and Lt. Drake the series's de facto main character. We see Drake as dignified, the impression of honor and the ideal of a military officer wise and patient and as we can see a thing for long drawn out philosophical monologues. The man is for his outward exterior is very unsure of himself and his place in the universe as is.

Qin, on the other hand is probably the stereotypical portrayal of a grunt, rude, brash, only cares about his immediate needs and wants and whiny always searching for an excuse to complain and if he can't complain, he will complain about that always asking the right questions but for the wrong reasons, and criminally lazy.

Essentially who I to an extant am as a person versus who I at times would want to be.

And he has a Katana, because they're KatanasAreJustBetter.

Standard Version.

http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/9543/spqtch01pg0001.png


Large Version

http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/4213/spqtch01pg0001large.png


I think a creative trend I will follow for all the initial characters is to break off chunks of my Psyche (as I see myself, how I am and what I want, and what I need) and personalize them in their own individual characters and expand upon them as a easy means to contrast them from each other and as a jumping off point to where I wish their characters to go.

What sucks is I was 90% done this when I realized Roman forts are primarily wood, as some of you can undoubtedly tell the Tyrrians I am going for the Roman Republic feel to them.

Feedback or else!

[Raenir Salazar]

New.


http://img40.imageshack.us/img40/1416/spqtch01pg0002.png

[Emperor Ing]

This has pretty good art, but I would like to say just a few things:
1) Don't steal jokes. This is obviously derived from Red vs Blue.
2) Avoid massive blocks of text. I really shouldnt have to explain why.
3) Make sure your character's mouth actually opens when they talk! :smalltongue:

[Raenir Salazar]

the first strip is more of a shout out/homage to RvB and to test out my style with some pre existing source material. Much like people who do cover songs.

"2) Avoid massive blocks of text. I really shouldnt have to explain why."

*cough* Are we even fans of the same comic?

"3) Make sure your character's mouth actually opens when they talk!"

Its a deliberate style choice on my part for Drake to talk with his mouth almost shut, hes a quiet low tone of voice kind of person.

[Emperor Ing]

might I recommend you establish Drake as a telepath ASAP?
...and give him a slightly more original name? :smalltongue:

Also note: Maintain an archives of all your comics in the first post. It helps for new readers to catch up.

[T-O-E]

This shows some promise.
Some constructive criticism, take or ignore:


"2) Avoid massive blocks of text. I really shouldnt have to explain why."

*cough* Are we even fans of the same comic?

It's generally a flaw. Just because we like the OotS doesn't mean we like every single thing about it. Try not to over-explain jokes or plot-points, or add unnecessary dialogue (I haven't noticed any of this yet, but I'd keep it in mind in the future).


"3) Make sure your character's mouth actually opens when they talk!"

Its a deliberate style choice on my part for Drake to talk with his mouth almost shut, hes a quiet low tone of voice kind of person.

More of a suggestion than criticism:
The same could probably be accomplished by using a smaller font for his dialogue. Possibly without punctuation. Other comics do this.

The speech-bubble tails kind of annoy me. Is this a personal choice or the only way you know how to do them? Apologies if I'm being rude. If you're using Inkscape, draw a triangle, set it over the bubble and use the union tool to combine them.

The text is kind of inconsistent. Sometimes it's centred and sometimes it's not. It's kind of annoying.
Also, sometimes the text collides with the line of the bubbles.


Good luck. I'll be reading. :smallsmile:

[Raenir Salazar]

yah I'm tryignt o figure that out it seems when I do the option to auto align the text into a frame it left adjusts it when i want it centered.

"The speech-bubble tails kind of annoy me. Is this a personal choice or the only way you know how to do them? Apologies if I'm being rude. If you're using Inkscape, draw a triangle, set it over the bubble and use the union tool to combine them."

a what kind of triangle? Make it white without a stroke border? Which button is union tool where can I find it.

[Raenir Salazar]

might I recommend you establish Drake as a telepath ASAP?
...and give him a slightly more original name? :smalltongue:

Also note: Maintain an archives of all your comics in the first post. It helps for new readers to catch up.

Drake seems fine, while I'm generally going with Latin/Greek names for most of the characters Drake is simply another cultures way of saying "Dragon" right?

[Emperor Ing]

Drake seems fine, while I'm generally going with Latin/Greek names for most of the characters Drake is simply another cultures way of saying "Dragon" right?

I'm not 100% sure of its origin, but yeah, it is, and very well known too.

[Threeshades]

Looks nice to me so far. But for better reading i suggest you arranging the speechballoons within a panel in the order you would read a text. From left to right and then downwards. So the reader instanly sees which balloon to read first.
Im referring to the last panel here it looks like the text is said in this order:
"Sir, yes Sir!"
"Show off..."
"Lieutenant Drake! Get your ass down to the Colonel's HQ[...]"


EDIT:
Oh and besides bein another way to say dragon, Drake also refers to a specific darconic subrace in some Fantasy settings (for example in Magic: the Gathering drakes are smaller usually less powerful dragons with two legs and two wings) and it refers to male ducks.

[Raenir Salazar]

Yo T-O-E, can I get some better instructions on making good speech balloons?

[Keris]

[...]Drake is simply another cultures way of saying "Dragon" right?
If by "another culture" you mean "Archaic English", then yes. "Drake" comes from Old English, and "Dragon" from Old French. But they both come from the Latin draco, which came from the Greek drakōn, which probably meant either "clear sighted" or "shiny", having roots in derkomai ("I see clearly", "I watch", "I gleam").
Drake as a term for a male duck is apparently Germanic in origin, but I'm not sure what the route for that was.


Yo T-O-E, can I get some better instructions on making good speech balloons?
While I'm not The Poster Formerly Known as Troll, Castaras and I have both posted guides to making speech bubbles in the Inkscape Help Thread.


How do you make Speech Bubbles in Inkscape?

To begin with, you draw yourself a nice white oval, the size you want the speech bubble to be.

http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/5024/rect3134.png

Then you draw in the.... I dunno what it is called, but the pointy thing that points to the person who's speaking.

http://img529.imageshack.us/img529/1746/rect31342.png

Then you select both objects, then go to Path - Union.

http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/1525/thingyo.png

Then you have your Speechbubble!

http://img43.imageshack.us/img43/6545/rect31344.png

http://img38.imageshack.us/img38/3913/15959267.png


Putting text in a speech bubble:

http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z257/kerisrain/speech2.png
First, draw a rough oval and write out your speech. You don't need any line breaks.
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z257/kerisrain/speech3.png
Selecting both, choose the "Flow into Frame" option, or press Alt+W.
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z257/kerisrain/speech4.png
This is the result, and you can change the size of the oval to give you:
http://i194.photobucket.com/albums/z257/kerisrain/speech5.png
A basic speech oval. (The words re-will wrap automatically)

You can either use it like this, or a recommended tactic is to make the oval fully transparent or move it out of frame, and then draw a new bubble, complete with tail, as the text in this bubble is a bit close to the edge.

[Raenir Salazar]

I do the flow into frame option but it has the text bordering the left hand side but normal on the right.

[Threeshades]

I do the flow into frame option but it has the text bordering the left hand side but normal on the right.

Is the written text centrally aligned?

[Raenir Salazar]

i think its left aligned but can't seem to get it centered.

[Keris]

i think its left aligned but can't seem to get it centered.

The alignment buttons (Align left, Centre, Align right and Justify) are just to the right of the text size in Inkscape.

[MethosH]

I enjoy the idea, and I really hope you improve with time.. here goes some tips:

All... Comics... On... The... First.... Post... :smalleek:

Other thing.... Most people will want the read them on a smaller size... If you make huge text blocks and add this to a comic where the text is hard to read on a smaller size... well.. that is just annoying... We read huge text blocks from OotS because we care enough about it to give it a try... Check the first OotS comics... Less text and bigger letters! BIGGER LETTERS!

Oh... And make new mouths... You characters appear to be laughing every time the are talking... Even when they are serious about it. It is hilarious and ridiculous at the same time.

But keep it up! It sounds like this is going to turn up as a great comic :smallbiggrin:

EDIT:



1) Don't steal jokes. This is obviously derived from Red vs Blue.

Some people say that creative person is just someone that knows how to hide his source of inspiration. :smallbiggrin:

[Raenir Salazar]

I completed the cast page, more comics to follow.

http://i46.tinypic.com/30c26hc.png