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Skeppio
2009-07-29, 04:51 AM
Hi, I'm Skeppio and this is my first homebrew monster, the Beastflesh Golem. Critique and tips appreciated. Please feel free to point out any game rule errors I've made.

Beastflesh Golem

Size/Type: Large Construct
Hit Dice: 20d10+30 (140 hp)
Initiative: -1
Speed: 40 ft. (8 squares).
Armor Class: 18 (-1 size, -1 Dex, +10 natural), touch 6, flat-footed 18
Base Attack/Grapple: +15/+27
Attack: Bite +22 melee (1d10+8)
Full Attack: Bite +22 melee (1d10+8) and 2 claws +17 melee (1d8+4)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Pounce.
Special Qualities: Construct traits, damage reduction 5/adamantine, darkvision 60 ft., immunity to magic, scent, frightful presence.
Saves: Fort +6, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities: Str 27, Dex 9, Con -, Int -, Wis 2, Cha 1
Skills: -
Feats: -
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary or pair
Challenge Rating: 10
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 21-23 (Large), 24-46 (Huge)
Level Adjustment: —

http://images4.wikia.nocookie.net/wowwiki/images/4/44/Gluth.jpg
Image (c) Blizzard Entertainment

A beastflesh golem is a large four-legged creature made from the flesh of dead animals. A beastflesh golem vaguely resembles a giant patchwork dog-like creature. A beastflesh golem is about 10 feet long and weighs about 900 pounds.

Pounce (Ex)
If a beastflesh golem charges, it can make a full attack.

Immunity to Magic (Ex)
A beastflesh golem is immune to any spell or spell-like ability that allows spell resistance. In addition, certain spells and effects function differently against the creature, as noted below.
A magical attack that deals cold or fire damage slows a beastflesh golem (as the slow spell) for 2d6 rounds, with no saving throw.
A magical attack that deals electricity damage breaks any slow effect on the golem and heals 1 point of damage for every 3 points of damage the attack would otherwise deal. If the amount of healing would cause the golem to exceed its full normal hit points, it gains any excess as temporary hit points. For example, a beastflesh golem hit by a lightning bolt heals 3 points of damage if the attack would have dealt 11 points of damage. A beastflesh golem gets no saving throw against attacks that deal electricity damage.

Frightful Presence (Ex)
When a beastflesh golem roars or rushes forward, it inspires terror in all creatures within 30ft that have fewer Hit Dice or levels than it has. Each potentially affected opponent must succeed at a Will save (DC 20 (10 + 1/2 HD of the golem)) or become shaken for 5d6 rounds. A successful save leaves that opponent immune to that golem's frightful presence for 24 hours.

Skills
A beastflesh golem gains a +12 bonus to Jump checks.

Construction
The pieces of a beastflesh golem must come from normal animal corpses (Medium or larger) that have not decayed significantly. Assembly requires a minimum of eight different bodies — one for each limb, three for the torso (including head), and the brain. In some cases, more bodies may be necessary. Special unguents and bindings worth 500 gp are also required. Note that creating a beastflesh golem requires casting a spell with the evil descriptor.
Assembling the body requires a DC 25 Craft (leatherworking) check or a DC 25 Heal check. CL 14th; Craft Construct, animate dead, bear's endurance, bull’s strength, geas/quest, limited wish, caster must be at least 14th level; Price 150,000 gp; Cost 98,000 gp + 3100 XP.

Debihuman
2009-07-29, 05:48 AM
It's always good to see a new homebrewer. Welcome to the club.

It's a pretty good beastie, but there are a few errors in the statblock. We all make them.

Since there is already a -1 dex penalty, flat-footed is 18. You can't use your armor bonus (if any) to flat-footed AC, but a penalty isn't a bonus so it's already factored in.

BAB for Constructs is 3/4 like a cleric, so BAB is +15. Grapple is BAB + special size modifier + Str modifier. Grapple is +15 +4 (for size) +8 (modifier for Str 27) for a total of +27. [Note: Grapple size modifier is not the same number as melee attack size modifer.]

Melee Attack is BAB + Str modifier + size modifier (15 + 8 -1) so it should be +22. Also, a secondary attack is a -5 so you need to decide which attack is the secondary attack. Normally, you list primary attack first so Bite should be +22 melee and Claws would be +17 melee. Damage is normally same as Str bonus for primary attack and 1/2 str bonus to secondary attack so Bite damage would be 1d10+8. [Note: some monsters only have secondary attacks but that is usually noted in the text. and monsers with only one attack add 1 and 1/2 times their Str modifier].

Unintelligent monsters usually have no skills except for racial skills. You should list the racial skills in a skills section at the end. Also, normally racial skills are given out in even numbers. Skills: Jump +4, Listen +8, Spot +4.

DC for frightful presence usually scales. (10 + 1/2 HD of creature). While it does have a DC of 20, if you advance the creature, the Frightful Presence should also increase accordingly.

Creatures usually increase in size when they double their hit dice. So advancing it as you do results in this: 21-32 (Large), 33-64 (Huge). If you want it to cap around at 44, then advance thusly: 21-22 (Large) 23-44 (Huge). Or, you could cap it at 46: 21-23 (Large), 24-46 (Huge).

Edit: your Saves are off. Base for saves is +6. Fort is +6, Ref is +5 and Will is +2.
Debby

Skeppio
2009-07-29, 06:16 AM
Thanks for the help Debihuman. I've made the changes you suggested. Anything I've missed/any other critique?

Debihuman
2009-07-29, 06:24 AM
Space/Reach is for a Huge creatiure not Large. Large is 10 ft/10 ft or 10 ft/5 ft. (whether it is tall or long).

Other than that, it looks complete.

I'd recommend giving it Pounce as a special ability. It doesn't have a rake attack, but it can still benefit from making a full attack when it charges. This will also help distinguish it from a more standard flesh golem.

Debby

Skeppio
2009-07-29, 06:34 AM
Space/Reach is for a Huge creatiure not Large. Large is 10 ft/10 ft or 10 ft/5 ft. (whether it is tall or long).

Other than that, it looks complete.

I'd recommend giving it Pounce as a special ability. It doesn't have a rake attack, but it can still benefit from making a full attack when it charges. This will also help distinguish it from a more standard flesh golem.

Debby

Thanks again Debby. You've been a big help. Looks like this beastie is ready to roll!

Debihuman
2009-07-29, 06:46 AM
Now that you've give it racial skills, you need to adjust for ability modifiers and put them back in the skill section. Jump is Str-based (+8), Listen and Spot are both Wis-based (-4) and so you get Jump +12, Listen +0 and Spot +0.

That's it. Looks really good.

Debby