foot in mouth moment

[MR.PIXIE]

have you ever had a foot in mouth moment.
if so, what did you say, and to who?
to day i was talking to a deaf girl (she read lips)
and the conversasion was "whats you favorite ...?''
after a couple questions she asks what my favorite
thing to do is and i said listen to music. well because of
how well the conversation was going i forgot she was
deaf and i asked her " what kind of music do you listen
to?"
she got mad and i was like "no i didnt mean it!"
but she just turned away and told the teacher i was picking on her.

[RTGoodman]

Back several years ago, a group of us were about to go accept awards at a band (well, indoor percussion) competition, and we were just kinda chatting and whatnot, and an excellent opportunity to say "Your mom [blah blah blah]" came up after one friend of mine said something. So, of course, I said it. :smalltongue:

For some reason, everyone else just kinda looked at me, and she just said, "Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.

(She wasn't actually mad or anything about it, though - she knew I didn't know and was just making a joke and all that. Thank goodness.)

[d13]

Back several years ago, a group of us were about to go accept awards at a band (well, indoor percussion) competition, and we were just kinda chatting and whatnot, and an excellent opportunity to say "Your mom [blah blah blah]" came up after one friend of mine said something. So, of course, I said it. :smalltongue:

For some reason, everyone else just kinda looked at me, and she just said, "Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.

(She wasn't actually mad or anything about it, though - she knew I didn't know and was just making a joke and all that. Thank goodness.)

Being at the 'other' side, I can say that getting mad because someone doesn't know what you've been through is pretty unfair, though sometimes inevitable. :smallfrown:

[MR.PIXIE]

"Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.



once i was laughing about somthin funny. a while later a was try ing not to laugh about it but it came out when somone in the room said "my dad died:smallfrown: "

[SDF]

Back several years ago, a group of us were about to go accept awards at a band (well, indoor percussion) competition, and we were just kinda chatting and whatnot, and an excellent opportunity to say "Your mom [blah blah blah]" came up after one friend of mine said something. So, of course, I said it. :smalltongue:

For some reason, everyone else just kinda looked at me, and she just said, "Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.

(She wasn't actually mad or anything about it, though - she knew I didn't know and was just making a joke and all that. Thank goodness.)

Almost the same thing happened to me years ago. I believe my response was, "That explains why she didn't talk much." :smalltongue:

[Flame of Anor]

After a few bloomers (in the mistake sense, not the underwear sense) in my tender years, I have become super-sensitive to not making these. It mostly works, I'm happy to say.

[Hell Puppi]

I'm sure I've had some, but I still remember one that someone else did-

Guy: "You look like Tasha Yar."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "The girl from Star Trek."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "....not that I'm attracted to you"
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "I mean...ummm..."

[Rutskarn]

I have a Ukranian friend. One of my bizarre joke-habits is, in lieu of swearing, using increasingly convoluted and nonsensical expressions.

For example, I'll say "son of a [nationality] [profession]." Indiscriminate. Like, "son of a Kurdish wineseller", or "son of a Polish haberdasher".

Well, when stymied by him in a game of Brawl, I unconsciously muttered, "Son of a Ukranian yak-herder!"

Yeah, that irritated him a little. Ouch.

[Arakune]

That one is awkward...

Well, mostly what I say is uncounsciously "footed" first. That's why I don't speak too much. Unfortunately people think I'm unfriendly. All the time.

[Extra_Crispy]

A good friend of mine is 6ft 11inches tall, yes he is a mutant. I am 6'4" myself so when I saw his parents, his mother is maybe 5' tall, and his father is about 5'5'" I said something.

Me: "Where in the heck did you come from being soooo tall, what are you adopted?"
Friend: "Yes, yes I am, thought you knew that."
Me - proceed to extract foot from mouth

My friend just laughed at me.

[Boo]

have you ever had a foot in mouth moment.
if so, what did you say, and to who?
to day i was talking to a deaf girl (she read lips)
and the conversasion was "whats you favorite ...?''
after a couple questions she asks what my favorite
thing to do is and i said listen to music. well because of
how well the conversation was going i forgot she was
deaf and i asked her " what kind of music do you listen
to?"
she got mad and i was like "no i didnt mean it!"
but she just turned away and told the teacher i was picking on her.

You should've (or should now) ask her if she ever felt music, and if so, what music she likes best to feel. I'm told it's an interesting experience for the deaf, though I could never tell you for fact unless I were to become deaf myself. If she has never felt music (and that's putting your hands and/or other body parts to a speaker) maybe you could suggest something for her to try?

[Serpentine]

A good friend of mine is 6ft 11inches tall, yes he is a mutant. I am 6'4" myself so when I saw his parents, his mother is maybe 5' tall, and his father is about 5'5'" I said something.

Me: "Where in the heck did you come from being soooo tall, what are you adopted?"
Friend: "Yes, yes I am, thought you knew that."
Me - proceed to extract foot from mouth

My friend just laughed at me.Heeeey, it's Extra Crispy! I've been thinking about you lately. Assuming, of course, that you're the person I was thinking of, and not another person who I keep mixing you up with <.< Were you the one in that nasty burning accident? If so, 1. it is you! Where've you been? and 2. has anyone had a case of foot-in-mouth disease involving that?

[EndlessWrath]

Back several years ago, a group of us were about to go accept awards at a band (well, indoor percussion) competition, and we were just kinda chatting and whatnot, and an excellent opportunity to say "Your mom [blah blah blah]" came up after one friend of mine said something. So, of course, I said it. :smalltongue:

For some reason, everyone else just kinda looked at me, and she just said, "Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.

(She wasn't actually mad or anything about it, though - she knew I didn't know and was just making a joke and all that. Thank goodness.)

My buddy from my old theater lost his mother around October 2008. My head being constantly in the clouds and me being very forgetful (and a constant user of thats what she said and your mom! jokes) i let one fly off without realizing. He grew quiet and i didn't realize for 20 minutes what happened. :smalleek: twas very bad.

[Yarram]

Back several years ago, a group of us were about to go accept awards at a band (well, indoor percussion) competition, and we were just kinda chatting and whatnot, and an excellent opportunity to say "Your mom [blah blah blah]" came up after one friend of mine said something. So, of course, I said it. :smalltongue:

For some reason, everyone else just kinda looked at me, and she just said, "Well, my mom's dead." I thought she was just joking and said, "Aw, no she's not."

Yeah, it turns out her mom actually was dead. :smallfrown: Thankfully, it had been when she was little rather that something really recent, but still... I felt terrible for a long time.

(She wasn't actually mad or anything about it, though - she knew I didn't know and was just making a joke and all that. Thank goodness.)

Heh... I did that once... She cried.
'Cept the weird thing is her mum died when she was like 2 and a half, so I can't understand why you'd continue to be choked up about it 14 years later... I'm pretty sure it was a power-trip.
I find it kinda difficult to care about other peoples relatives dying, not because I'm selfish, but because I don't cry when people close to me die. I'd explain why, but it'd breach the rules, but crying about a person close to you dying feels... Too selfish to me. Not that I'm being accusatory.

[Liriel]

I had a professor who, due to a brain injury, would often say rather flippant joking things; he had no inhibition. Being rather used to this, I'd joke right back with him. He wasn't being offensive, wasn't being mean, etc.

Anyway, summer break ends and I come back to campus for fall semester. I see him as I'm going to buy my books and ask him how his summer went. He said, "My wife left me." (Back story, this is USA, he & his wife moved here from Australia, she just got there in the spring of that year, IIRC.)

Thinking this was just another joke (he's told some similar things in class before and he didn't sound sad/change expression), I replied, "Oh, that's great!"

It was at this point that I see my classmate/his student secretary shaking her head at me, trying to let me know that he was actually telling the truth this time. Oh dear....:smalleek:

"Um...I mean...umm...wait...really?" He nods. "I'm sorry."

It ended up working out great. My classmate told me later he was doing alright and my reaction was probably the best he'd gotten. (Guess it was a confidence boost/kick in the pants/whatever for my Prof.) But dangit...I felt about this big.

[Vmag]

It ended up working out great. My classmate told me later he was doing alright and my reaction was probably the best he'd gotten.

See, a lot of people who worry about getting their foot in their mouths worry about social awkwardness that follows, but, really, the above situation is what you want to go for each and every time.

Me? Come on... I live my keeping my foot firmly lodged there. It's how I obtain my sustenance. As such, I've got way too many examples to keep track of, and can't imagine a life without it :smallamused:

"Your Mom's An--" are great for these, as above examples show, especially when you're being entirely deliberate. Escalation is a beautiful thing. Cross the line? I pole vault.

[Serpentine]

My ex said he admired me for my ability to bowl headlong into an incredibly touchy subject and then gallop out the other side of the presumed-inevitable awkwardness.
'nuff said.

[Totally Guy]

My name occasionally gets me in trouble. It's Guy.

So one time I'm walking along and from behind I hear a girl shout "Guy stop!", so I stopped, turned around and saw two groups of girls walking in my direction. I don't recognise any of them and they don't acknowledge me at all. So I start walking again.

"Guy stop!"

I hear it again. These one of these two groups is quite close to me now. So I ask them if they were asking me to stop as well as eyeing up the second group to see if I recognised any of them, which I didn't.

They then explained that the further back group were asking the ahead group to stop. Then I explained that my name is Guy so "Guys stop" sounded very much like "Guy stop".

They then asked if I was alright, and if I'd lost my mum. I was 22 walking through the university at the time, not a small child lost in the supermarket. How rude!:smallmad:

[BisectedBrioche]

My foot lives in my mouth. I've practically got stomapodinitus, or whatever a doctor would call it to be facetious.

[Flame of Anor]

My foot lives in my mouth. I've practically got stomapodinitus, or whatever a doctor would call it to be facetious.

How could you...

My whole family is dying of stomapodinitus...

YOU'RE SO INSENSITIVE :smallfurious:

:smalltongue:

[Vmag]

I don't recognise any of them and they don't acknowledge me at all. So I start walking again.

...

Then I explained that my name is Guy so "Guys stop" sounded very much like "Guy stop".

Hence why you turn around and say "Yes?" or acknowledge it somehow, rather than staring like a deer caught in the headlights, guy :smalltongue:

[NerfTW]

have you ever had a foot in mouth moment.
if so, what did you say, and to who?
to day i was talking to a deaf girl (she read lips)
and the conversasion was "whats you favorite ...?''
after a couple questions she asks what my favorite
thing to do is and i said listen to music. well because of
how well the conversation was going i forgot she was
deaf and i asked her " what kind of music do you listen
to?"
she got mad and i was like "no i didnt mean it!"
but she just turned away and told the teacher i was picking on her.

I'd tell her to grow thicker skin. It's a pretty common follow up question, not an attack on her disability. If she got upset at that, she must never have a good day.

[Crimmy]

I'm sure I've had some, but I still remember one that someone else did-

Guy: "You look like Tasha Yar."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "The girl from Star Trek."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "....not that I'm attracted to you"
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "I mean...ummm..."

This is mostly what happened to me once.
But the girl looked like a real friend of mine.

Me: Hey, Alix!
Girl: Huh?
Me: Oh, sorry. You just look like someone I know.
Girl: Yeah, sure, jerk.

The next part, I consider, is no more a FIM moment, but you can read it if you want to.
Me: :smallconfused: Wat?
Girl: You tryin to pull something?
Me: Uhh, no?
Girl: Sure, sure. Get away or I'm calling the cops.
Me: WAT?
Girl: You heard me!
Me: Yeah, yeah, but what's your prob?

Then she started yelling I was pulling some weird suff on her.
Luckily for me, one of the guys who came knew both me and my friend, and clarified it all before the girl called the friggin militia on me.

[RyuseiDate]

... roleplaying foot in mouth moment...

long story short, a friend of mine, who DMs a certain campaign suffered the loss of his big brother-like cousin (suicide by hanging)... after a few weeks he decided that he was in shape to continue the campaign and so... (Chatlike view to make things quicker)

<Merk> it's been great talking to you.
*Merk is a weakling sorcerer*
<Gabriel> indeed it has... *Gabriel leaves along with his escort... everyone else in the room is staring at Merk because he talked to Gabriel like you talk with a commoner... Merk notices that*
<Merk> ... ... ok... I mess'd up big time, right?
<Soldier> you called the imperial prince by his name...
<Merk> ... ...
...
...
<Merk> ... ok, I'm off, if I'm late to work tomorrow, look in my room, I'll be hanging from the ceiling.

... *awkward silence*

DM: ... low blow.
Me: huh? .. ... ... ... ... OH GOSH! SORRY VICKS!!! O_o;;;; I DIDN'T MEANT THAT, I'M SORRY! GOSH, HOW COULD I BE SO...

[Shadowbane]

Ooh, that one sucks.

[Vmag]

Best way to make up for that one is usually an impromptu movie night, your treat. Root beer, pop corn, Heathers...

[Bor the Barbarian Monk]

As it happens, during the very first month of my blog, I wrote a post appropriate to this thread. Thus, I present to you: Open mouth... (http://sometimeswrite.blogspot.com/2008/06/open-mouth.html), insert foot, chew vigorously. It's about a boy, and a girl, and plans for a date gone awry. :smallredface:

[Lerky]

I'm sure I've had some, but I still remember one that someone else did-

Guy: "You look like Tasha Yar."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "The girl from Star Trek."
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "....not that I'm attracted to you"
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: "I mean...ummm..."

...you look like Tasha Yar?

[Icewalker]

That's a pretty dark, and at the same time heartwarming story there, Bor.

[Lerky]

As it happens, during the very first month of my blog, I wrote a post appropriate to this thread. Thus, I present to you: Open mouth... (http://sometimeswrite.blogspot.com/2008/06/open-mouth.html), insert foot, chew vigorously. It's about a boy, and a girl, and plans for a date gone awry. :smallredface:
Wow, that actually has to be one of the best stories I've ever heard.
It had everything love, comedy, sadness. It sounds just like something froma movie I'm having a problem with believing it actually happened. Thanks for sharing it:smallsmile:

[FreddoGoatpants]

Back when Star Wars Galaxies was worth playing (:smallmad: still bitter), I was in guild chat with a few in-person friends. My friend, Gyd (a small green rodian) told me that Paks (a large female wookiee, and Gyd's wife in real life) was pregnant. Thinking that this was an in game joke, I responded, "Oh jeez, that thing's going to look like a gremlin!"

After about two minutes of awkward guild chat silence, my friend Nybbas sent me a PM telling me they were serious. He then broke the silence in guild chat with, "Foot...in...mouth..."

Of course, nobody took it to heart, and we all had a good laugh about it.

Ian is now three years old, and I get teased about that comment every time I come over to babysit.

[Hell Puppi]

...you look like Tasha Yar?

Well at that point I was blonde and had a haircut similar to her's. Maybe a little similar in the face, but I'm not sure. This was a few years ago, too.

Now I look something like this:


http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/59/l_4f5fea59686a49fbae21aba0101f299d.jpg


I just remember the conversation because it was the same kid who later tried to get people to pet his armpit hair "because it felt like a poodle".

[Last_resort_33]

As it happens, during the very first month of my blog, I wrote a post appropriate to this thread. Thus, I present to you: Open mouth... (http://sometimeswrite.blogspot.com/2008/06/open-mouth.html), insert foot, chew vigorously. It's about a boy, and a girl, and plans for a date gone awry. :smallredface:

That's the best thing I've read today (ok, I've mostly been reading server reports, but hey!)

[Fifty-Eyed Fred]

My cows had a foot and mouth moment back in '01...

[Flame of Anor]

As it happens, during the very first month of my blog, I wrote a post appropriate to this thread. Thus, I present to you: Open mouth... (http://sometimeswrite.blogspot.com/2008/06/open-mouth.html), insert foot, chew vigorously. It's about a boy, and a girl, and plans for a date gone awry. :smallredface:

Wow. These things all seem to happen to you, Bor, don't they? :smallfrown:

The story was sweet, though, in a prefixed-with-bitter kind of way.

[Ricky S]

This didnt happen to me but to a friend I knew.

We were getting ready to go to dinner (on a school trip) and two of the girls were like "we are going to dress up tonight". Anyways we start getting prepared and like 20 mins later we see the girls and my friend says to one of them,"I thought you were dressing up?"

Ouch! she had obviously tried really hard and it was crushing to see her face after he said that

[Umael]

After years of having foot-in-mouth disease, it has evolved to a terminal case of snarkitis. The snark will kill me, eventually.

Case in point:

Two days ago, I was on my lunchbreak, dinking around on the computer. One of my co-workers, a very sweet gal, comes over to my desk.

"Is that the Smith file? Yeah, it is. Excuse me, got to put some stuff in the file. I know it annoys you when people do that."

Me: No, the only thing that is annoying is you're still talking to me.

The look on her face was wonderful. I started cracking up, so she marched away in a huff, then turned around and flipped me off (she knew I was teasing her, so she found it funny, but still annoying).

Later that day, I see her again and start laughing in memory of what happened. She flips me off again (did I mention that she was a sweet gal, very friendly?), and proclaims, "And that was NOT meant with love!"

A little after that, a salesman selling dried fruit and nuts makes his weekly or so rounds, and she buys some. She walks back to her office offering some to everyone. When she sees me, she says, "You don't get any!"

That's not the best story by far.


One of my co-workers walks over to my desk and asks me a work-related question. While I'm telling her the answer, a second co-worker comes over with a fax in hand, interupts me by saying, "Hey (Umael), guess what I've got?"

To which I reply, without missing a beat: A bad case of syphilis?

The first co-worker just breaks down in hysterical laughter while the second co-worker has this look stunned-bemused-chagrinned expression on his face.

I follow up with: Wow, THAT got though the brain-to-mouth filter!


This leads to:

The first co-worker from my second story, upon meeting my wife at the company Christmas party, asked her (in jest): "How do you stand him?"


So take heart! Foot-in-mouth is not the worst thing that can happen to you! It may one day evolve, and you'll be doomed like me!

[Totally Guy]

Flipping you off? I hope that doesn't mean what I think it means...

[Umael]

Flipping you off? I hope that doesn't mean what I think it means...

Probably not.

It's an American term in sign language that translates into a very rude word (i.e., I annoyed her, so she made a crude non-verbal comment in reply - which I deserved, to be honest).

[Lerky]

Well at that point I was blonde and had a haircut similar to her's. Maybe a little similar in the face, but I'm not sure. This was a few years ago, too.

Now I look something like this:


http://c2.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/59/l_4f5fea59686a49fbae21aba0101f299d.jpg


I just remember the conversation because it was the same kid who later tried to get people to pet his armpit hair "because it felt like a poodle".

wow you do kinda look like her:smalltongue:

[kopout]

One of my co-workers walks over to my desk and asks me a work-related question. While I'm telling her the answer, a second co-worker comes over with a fax in hand, interupts me by saying, "Hey (Umael), guess what I've got?"

To which I reply, without missing a beat: A bad case of syphilis?

The first co-worker just breaks down in hysterical laughter while the second co-worker has this look stunned-bemused-chagrinned expression on his face.

I follow up with: Wow, THAT got though the brain-to-mouth filter!


This leads to:

The first co-worker from my second story, upon meeting my wife at the company Christmas party, asked her (in jest): "How do you stand him?"


So take heart! Foot-in-mouth is not the worst thing that can happen to you! It may one day evolve, and you'll be doomed like me!

Bah! I've been like this for years and it hasn't killed me. My friends just learn to ignore many of the things I say. Just today we were playing monapoly and all of a sudden I ask sue (one of my friends) "can I barrow your cat?" the look on her face was priceless :smalltongue:. (she didn't let me barrow her cat not even the porcilin one:smallfrown:)

But thats not foot in mouth. Foot in mouth is the time I told the guy with scolioses that he should go to noter dame and then proceed to explain that it was a joke about hunch-backs.

I also asked a fat guy if he was OK with fat jokes.

[Vella_Malachite]

I have surprisingly few of these, even given that I have a severe case of chronic snark. I just tend to be sensitive about new people. 's funny...if I don't know you, I'm more polite than if I've been your best friend for years (thankfully, the person who has been my best friend for years is perfectly OK with getting her own back :smallbiggrin:)

But my parents worry about it - when I went for work experience, my Dad told me not to make jokes because I have a "sarcastic sense of humour" and "might offend someone". When I told Mum about it, she laughed. Also, most of the people I was working with seemed to share my sense of humour, so we had a good ol' snarky week.

[RTGoodman]

I just remembered this story from a few years back.

I was coming back to my dorm in the first few weeks of my first year as an undergraduate, and it happened to be the Honors dorm (which is why I was there), the International dorm, AND the dorm for at least a few of the blind/seeing-impaired students that lived on campus.

As I turned the corner to go to the door that was right there, I accidentally bumped into somebody coming around from the other way out of the door. I was focused on something else (don't remember what) and promptly said "Oh, sorry - didn't see you."

At that point, I realized the person I had bumped into was a blind guy with his official white walking stick and all that.

Now at first, I didn't think of it, but once I got through the door and into the elevator, I realized I had picked perhaps the WORST wording for the apology possible. :smallsigh:

[Pyrian]

I dunno, you did give him an opening for some fantastic comeback lines. :smallcool:

[Serpentine]

Found a good one on FMyLife.com:
"Today, a patient was late for a psychiatry appointment, after having missed his previous two. I am the medical student on the team that was supposed to do his assessment. I said, "You snooze, you lose." Everyone stopped and looked at me. Apparently, he missed them because he has narcolepsy. FML"

[Totally Guy]

I was focused on something else (don't remember what) and promptly said "Oh, sorry - didn't see you."

At that point, I realized the person I had bumped into was a blind guy with his official white walking stick and all that.

I'd have thought this would be socially acceptable. I mean I've said things like this to a blind man I used to know and it was never really awkward. Nor did it trigger come back jokes.:smalltongue:

Edit: At least you didn't say "Guess you didn't see me coming". That would probably fit.

[Coidzor]

Hmm. Probably the worst was when one of my friends was randomly giving me the "You're like a brother to me, so quit trying to get into my pants" speech. I cocked my head at her and blinked several times before asking, "You worry about your brother wanting you sexually? I know you're from [certain state renowned for incest here], but... wow..."

The other girls who were hanging out in her room with us, presumably to bear witness to this just sort of gawped at that.

So I shrugged and bid them goodnight and that they'd be a little less weird next time we met.

No such luck.

Second worst would be the three or four times down the years when I've snuck up on a friend from behind only to find out it was a doppelganger.

[Umael]

Second worst would be the three or four times down the years when I've snuck up on a friend from behind only to find out it was a doppelganger.

It could have been worse.

You could have copped a feel.

No, I'm not going to talk about it.

[Coidzor]

It could have been worse.

You could have copped a feel.

No, I'm not going to talk about it.

Y'know, I kinda regret never doing that back when all I would've had to worry about was grievous bodily harm. But no, only my elbows came in contact with *self-censorship* due to the fact I was hugging from behind on two of those occasions. haha.

[Cyrano]

Holy CRAP don't call it that.

[Anxious]

I've only had one of these moments recently that I can think of, but it was quite the doozy.

My dad and I woke up early on his birthday, and were sharing a pot of coffee in the kitchen. I happened to glance into the back yard where our dogs, a yellow lab and a particularly floppy basset hound, were laying under a tree. I jokingly said that Baxter (the basset hound) could pass for dead the way he was laying.

My dad looked out the window and said, "My god, I think he is." :smalleek:

Turns out he had been hit with bloat (http://www.globalspan.net/bloat.htm) sometime during the night, and it was too late to do anything by the time we had woken up. This, coupled with the fact my uncle had passed away a few days before, made it quite the dismal birthday.

[Liriel]

I've only had one of these moments recently that I can think of, but it was quite the doozy.

My dad and I woke up early on his birthday, and were sharing a pot of coffee in the kitchen. I happened to glance into the back yard where our dogs, a yellow lab and a particularly floppy basset hound, were laying under a tree. I jokingly said that Baxter (the basset hound) could pass for dead the way he was laying.

My dad looked out the window and said, "My god, I think he is." :smalleek:


Similar thing happened to me, although I didn't quite find it to be a 'foot in mouth' moment. *Shrugs*

I got up and went to the kitchen for breakfast on what was looking like a lovely summer day. I looked out the window and saw our dog and one of our cats basking in the sun. I chuckled and commented that they looked dead. My little sister and mom laughed - apparently they had that conversation an hour ago. (Morning people. Uggh.)

I grabbed something and went outside. Turns out the cat was, indeed, dead. I checked on the dog (alive, thankfully) and went back inside. When I informed them, my sister started crying her eyes out. My mom yelled at me for upsetting my little sister. I threw back the gem of, "Want me to bring his corpse in?" Uh...yeah...she believed me after that.

[Coidzor]

Pretty much making the You thread's current incarnation, actually.

I mean, I never thought I'd regret biting the bullet and making something for thread overflow as much as I do now.

Also. This post. http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=6745695&postcount=943

Edit: Oh, and recently I found out a girl I had called cute was 16 or 17. And so I apologized for saying anything to her at all since it felt weird to think of someone underage as being attractive and that it was wrong of me to say anything to her about it at all. Even though I was pretty sure I hadn't actually hit on her or anything.

[Last_resort_33]

Reminds me of a time when I was walking through town on the way back from the train station. Someone lept on my back, wrapped their arms around my neck and their legs around my waist, ripped out my headphones and yelled "Hello Sweetie" in my ear, I reversed, slamming the offender against a lamppost, whereupon this girl let go and said "You're not you!!!! Oh ****! You're not Matt!!" and proceded to apologise repeatedly. I told her not to worry, I thought it was quite funny.

[rubakhin]

One time my boyfriend Mikel broke up with me for about three weeks or so and I had gone back to working. So late one night, about two thirty, I'm lazing around on the couch watching Queer as Folk or something when I get a text on my phone. I don't recognize the number, so I don't know who it is, but it says something like, "I can't sleep without you. I need your touch, your hands on me."

So I figure it's this fat obsessive john who was getting a crush on me but had been offering just about anything but money for my favors. I was losing patience with him, but I didn't want to tell him off directly since it's not that attractive and I still kinda thought I could get some money out of him.

Johns like you to be a little stupid, it makes them think you're pliable. When I use email and texts professionally I use bad grammar on purpose - it's less threatening/sexier. (I mention this is an apologia for the massacre of the English language that follows.) So I texted him back saying something like "chris look if you u have the $$$ I'm urs but u kno wat kind of boi i am ... "

He texted me back with, "I don't know who Chris is, but this is Mikel."

And that was how my boyfriend found out I was a prostitute.

[Totally Guy]

Thus, I present to you: Open mouth... (http://sometimeswrite.blogspot.com/2008/06/open-mouth.html), insert foot, chew vigorously.

Someone in my office was just moaning that they never got to see Michael Jackson perform because he died before his gig in London. I just couldn't resist. I just had to say it. "He could have just said he didn't want to visit London.":smallbiggrin: