If you were a villain....

[Thoughtbot360]

...How would you take over Campaign setting X? What kind of minions would you use? How would you avoid a horrible defeat thanks to being blind to the cliched tropes and character flaws that plague bad guys since time immemorial? How much manical laughter is too much? What to do when this one group of subordinates prove to be comically incompetent?


And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?

[Gnorman]

Kill the heroes yourself. No sissy deathtraps with easy escape routes.

[AKA_Bait]

I would hire the PCs to take care at least 1/2 my problems for me. Considering that probably half of the other rulers in the setting are also evil and there are tons and tons of evil monsters out there that would eventually need to be brought to heel anyway, there should be plenty for me to have them doing as I politick myself to the top.



And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?

In my opinion, the most important thing a good base of operations needs for a villain is that it not look like the base of operations of a villain. Castle Sweetness-and-Light with the white stone work, the open sunny spaces, and the lovely flower garden seems perfect.

[Cracklord]

Endeavor to never get forced into combat encounters, keep all my treasure in one vault not in my base of operations, invest in an amulet of undetectable alignment, a hat of disguise, surrender if things are going bad, draft up a whole bunch of mutual defense pacts with other Evil Overlords, pretend to have a phobia (i.e secret weakness) to some pointless and rare substance, send all my guys in a mob instead of one at a time, the usual.
Also, I'd make sure I am more then a walking cliche, or at least appear to be, and I will get a whole bunch of ranks in sense motive so I can pull of Hannibal lectures.

[Shademan]

First I would make myself a secure stronghold from where i could launch my campaigns of nefarious intent. I would ally with the biggest and the meanest dragons, while at the same time getting lots of goblinoid minions to loot the countrysides and increase my funds, then I would start a intensive breeding campaign to create a army of HALF-DRAGONS!
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAA!!!!

and always carry some magic items that will let me cast greater friggin mirror image and planeshift at will

[kamikasei]

Depends on my motivations as a villain, and my personal resources (am I a wizard? A Changeling? Long-lived? Immortal?). Key to my plan would probably be infiltrating myself into as many power struggles as possible so that any group acting against me would thus strengthen a worse enemy of theirs.

[Eldariel]

If I was just Evil Evil Wants To Rule The World 'Cause My Parents Never Loved Me Enough (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmm-1LZE03k#t=5m14s) (Or Some Other Bad Excuse Such As Being Named Florence Even Though I Am A Boy)™, I'd use Planar Bound agents of good (along with Illusions) such as angels and eladrin to overthrow the government and to pretend that I'm the herald of the good deities and seize control to end corruption and evil once and for all.

Then I try to dispose of the good "fake" priests first and make sure that the people capable of uncovering my deception stay out. Then I use my angelic hordes (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFuMpYTyRjw) and a bunch of stupid adventurers to cleanse the world and start an era of darkness unlike the world has ever seen! Darkness! With Angels!


Tropes have no hold on me - I outtrope the tropes!

[Alavar]

If I was an effective evil villain, I would study this list for a year before starting my evil takeover: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilOverlordList

Then I would brush up on it every day or so...just in case.

[Forevernade]

If I were a villain I would meta-game like a bitch.
I would make sure I was an arch nemesis to each and every party member, so that I could gain a level every time they gained a level.
I would get mindrape as early as possible, with greater invisibility.
And have levels of Aristocracy + disguise.

[FMArthur]

I would probably just abuse Glibness and a Hat of Disguise (or be a changeling) to hang around the PCs all the time.

[Talya]

If you were a villain....

If???

Oh, nevermind.

[Tempest Fennac]

My approach would be to attempt to gain control over a large number of buisnesses in a large city before trying to set up similar buisnesses in other towns while trying to get the competition to sell up to me so that they are no longer competition (this would require a ton of money which I'd probably have to get through adventuring). Then I'd attempt to get influence with the church of a neutral diety (I'd probably go with Wee Jas here), with the intentions of getting healthcare benefits for everyone who works for my buisnesses. Then I would try to gain political power in as many cities as I could.

My rationel behind this approach is that, while it's still technically evil due to the "putting others out of buisness if they don't join my buisness empire" part, it would at least avoid tarnishing my reputation with killing people, and the fact that there's benefits to following me (eg: job security and health benefits) means that there's less of an incentive to rebel against me, as long as I don't do something stupid like go on a power trip where I make oppressive laws.

[AB]

First I would make myself a secure stronghold from where i could launch my campaigns of nefarious intent. I would ally with the biggest and the meanest dragons, while at the same time getting lots of goblinoid minions to loot the countrysides and increase my funds, then I would start a intensive breeding campaign to create a army of HALF-DRAGONS!
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAA!!!!


Sounds like good old Red Hand of Doom ;)

[Fixer]

I would have pet rust monsters, disenchanters, and get Disjunction as an at-will ability.

Attack the heroes' toys and watch as they cry like a river.

No pigments for spellbooks (outlaw books in general), no metal for armor or weapons, no manufacturing for the rogue's pretty toys, no worshiping of any gods other than me (even if I'm not a god, yet).

He (or she) who controls the resources controls the world.

[Tar Palantir]

I would use divinations to find every map to my base of operations, and change it with a map that says it leads to my base, but really leads to Tomb of Horrors :smallbiggrin:.

Through up some epic divination blockers, and then just kill things with fire (or, in the case of resistance/immunities, Searing Spell fire).

[Doc Roc]

I am a villain (http://forums.gleemax.com/showpost.php?p=18614543&postcount=197).

I'd probably reach for tainted scholar + Mother Cyst + Repeated divinations until I find out who will kill me later. Teleport to them, and perma-dominate them early in their career. You can planar bind a air or earth weird to handle the divination, and your save DC should be in the low to mid sixties in case you miss one during their start up period. Just start loading up Sallies and Johns with necrotic cysts and using them as living bombs if the heroes make it past level two without becoming your mindless servants. Take on Reserves of Strength and Consumptive Field to push your damage into the mind-wrenching range. It should be pretty easy to get around 40d6 per living and unwilling bomb. You can detonate them without LoE\LoS if I remember, so you can track them with divination of your choice. They don't even need to know or be dominated. You can even pay them to go help the PCs.

Kill them, kill their friends, break their nation, all from the shadows.


Notes: Depending on your reading of tainted scholar, the build may possess no MAD whatsoever. I presume it does not.

[BloodyAngel]

I WAS an evil villain once. Oh, the DM thought that the game's big bad was the villain, but by the end of the game I'd managed to...

- Seduced the group's paladin, but convinced her into a political marriageto the elven king instead of myself "for the good of the people"

- Convinced said king I was a grim but righteous hero who could help him defend his kingdom against the evil besieging it.. and attained the rank of general.

- Led several attacks against the enemy, arranging for people on our side who might object to my eventual rule to be lost in battle

- Mind-controlled a man the paladin had convinced to defect from the side of evil, and made him slay the king as he slept... arranging for the paladin to find him just after the slaying and slay the "assassin" in self defense.

- Broke said paladin's spirit entirely by using her guilt over letting the defector slay her new husband against her... while also ensuring she would never trust or see the enemy as anything but truly evil ever again.

- Rallied the people around the king's tragic death, sewing hate and anger towards our foes that would ensure they accepted my more... extreme methods of dealing with the enemy.

- Rekindled the relationship with the paladin, while convincing her that it was HER idea, and that our marriage had to happen, "for the good of the people", who needed a strong leader to keep them going.

- Was proclaimed the king of the elven nation, to thunderous applauded by the people.

- Went on to crush the enemy with acts of questionable morality and "ends justify the means" mentality... with my own population now accepting these ends, and my paladin wife falling quietly from grace as a result.

- Took control of the former "evil empire" to ensure they would never become a threat again... and resisted every urge to give a good evil laugh.


Had the game kept going, the (former) paladin was finally catching on to my manipulations and I believe there was going to be some kind of epic confrontation between us where she called me on it... after which, I planned to kill her and frame someone else, of course... She was very popular, so it would have been regretable, but by then, I had the kingdom in a pretty iron-clad grip and everyone thought I was a hero. (Granted, one who'd become a little jaded by seeing so much death around him. heh) As a widower, I'd be seen as more sympathetic AND be free to court around with other women.

Alas.... the game was forced to premature end when our DM moved. I'm still miffed that I never got to finish that game. Even if I lost the big, epic-smackdown... it was an awesome story!

[Ecalsneerg]

I did initially think 'Evil Overlord List', but I'm in D&D. I could go learn magic, and get badass magic items and stuff! Let's go for the fun, but utterly cliched villain role!

The trick, I think, is out-do every other cliched villain. Have the most vicious deathtraps, the biggest hordes of minions, etc etc.

[ritztastic]

Given ninth-level spells, this becomes immensely easy.
"Hey, Bob, you should com over and see this new thing I got!"
"Things? I love things!"
"Speaking of which... MINDRAPE"

It's just too easy.

Now, from a non-wizard point of view, I'd probably be too nice to be an effective villain. I'm the sort who would happily make Create Food and Prestidigitation traps to feed the masses.

There's an idea. Create factories/armories/armies/whatever, where in return for service you offer your slaves employees a decent meal every night and a modest payment. Allows mass-production of armor or weapons for later, then training of an army.

Once the army is established, stealthily entice war from a nearby nation. Save your nation from obliteration using your army. Become involved in public affairs. Run for office. Work your way up, making friends and influencing people, until you're top dog in the political infrastructure.

It takes awhile, so it's best to be an Elan or Warforged or something like that, but it's pretty safe.

[Optimystik]

Control all the stores so the heroes can't buy items. I always wondered how the heroes could always find enterprising shopkeepers in totalitarian city-states.

[Doc Roc]

Duck out to Sigil is what I normally do.

[Grommen]

I would use divinations to find every map to my base of operations, and change it with a map that says it leads to my base, but really leads to Tomb of Horrors :smallbiggrin:.

Through up some epic divination blockers, and then just kill things with fire (or, in the case of resistance/immunities, Searing Spell fire).

Now that is really evil man. Low down evil. Suppose your going to tell the players that you need the "Skull" of some long dead hero that lies at the end of the crypt too? Or just tell them that their is a secret entrance to the tomb in the mouth of one of the faces?

Now me personally. I would just study arcane magic. That way I would eventually become invincible like all wizards :) Then I would not need minions, PC's, Layers, Monsters, etc. I would just take over the world.

Hyrm I wonder if I still have that book on Black Magic in my closet.

Latter.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

There's an idea. Create factories/armories/armies/whatever, where in return for service you offer your slaves employees a decent meal every night and a modest payment. Allows mass-production of armor or weapons for later, then training of an army.

Once the army is established, stealthily entice war from a nearby nation. Save your nation from obliteration using your army. Become involved in public affairs. Run for office. Work your way up, making friends and influencing people, until you're top dog in the political infrastructure.

It takes awhile, so it's best to be an Elan or Warforged or something like that, but it's pretty safe.

And then you reveal yourself to be a Dark Lord of the Sith and turn the nation you saved into an Empire?

[ritztastic]

And then you reveal yourself to be a Dark Lord of the Sith and turn the nation you saved into an Empire?

Well, I suppose eventually.
Wow. I didn't even really think about Palpatine as I wrote that.

Just goes to show you how ingrained Star Wars is in my mind and thoughts.

[Doresain]

ive already been a villain too...numerous times as a matter of fact...my most recent villainous exploits were with a necropolitan paladin of slaughter (yeah crappy build i know, but it was fun)...

i murdered the children that released me from my tomb, hung a missionary from another continent from a tree, killed the chief of town and placed another PC as the new chief (and i was the power behind the throne), skinned a pixie and wore it as a belt, orchestrated an attack by goblins on a small elven community in order to collect bodies (both sides ended up getting wiped out), physically and mentally tortured another pixie until it became chaotic evil, and convinced a higher level paladin of honor that his very way of life was a lie

nothing too epic imo, but it works well enough for me

[Kris Strife]

Use an insanely powerful, randomly powered mecha from the future that I found in a junk yard and rebuilt using scrap parts. Cause immense amounts of collateral damage while fighting off 'the monster of the week' all while claiming to be the good guy in order to keep anyone else on the planet from being able to assemble something that can challenge me. Wait until heroes from another planet assume I'm evil and attack with their combining, defeat them and when their arch nemesis comes around congratulating me for being evil. I then forcibly combine the heroes' mecha with my own, and fire their ultimate weapon, destablized due to my mangling of their mechs, and destroy the universe.

[Darcand]

If I were a villian I would work alone. But I think the best villians are the "come in through the window and knife you while you sleep" type. My "lair" would be a cheap apartment over looking a rooftop getaway route and anyone who disappointed me would have a way of turning up dead...simply coincidental though, I'm sure.

[Morty]

I wouldn't be a villain. In your typical fantasy setting, if you're outright evil, villianous and generally wicked, sooner or later some band of misfits will luck their way into killing you no matter how hard you try. So it's better to achieve power and wealth through non-villainous means in the long run.

[Umael]

I WAS an evil villain once. Oh, the DM thought that the game's big bad was the villain, but by the end of the game I'd managed to...

...completely enthrall me with your story.

[Hyozo]

This is part of a campaign idea I had. Answering these questions actually helped me to determine parts of what is going to happen. I still need to work on it a bit though.

...How would you take over Campaign setting X?
Step one: Get both of the major international halfling organizations to respect me as their leader.
Step two: Rekindle international enemnity of recent war.
Step three: Cause continent-spanning food poisoning epidemic.
Step four: ?????
Step five: PROFIT!
Step six: Use above mentioned profit to buy out every other major international organization.
Step seven: I now essentially run the economy of multiple nations, and can force them out of the war I started.
Step eight: I haven't actually planned this far ahead, but the economy is mine, so the rest of the world shouldn't be too far behind.

What kind of minions would you use?
Anything I can trick into working for me. As this includes several dragons, I doubt gullibility among my legions is as large of a problem as it may sound.

How would you avoid a horrible defeat thanks to being blind to the cliched tropes and character flaws that plague bad guys since time immemorial?
Simulacra, several of them. I may be defeated from time to time, but they'll never beat me.

How much manical laughter is too much?
If there is even a small risk of somebody who diesn't know what I'm up to hearing it, it's too much.

What to do when this one group of subordinates prove to be comically incompetent?
Send them after some ancient treasure I don't actually care about, but may enjoy posessing.

And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?
Numerous, temporary, and easy to escape if doing so becomes necessary.

[kemmotar]

For one thing adhere to the overlord's bible (http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html), then appear to be the good guy while I gain power. Be a wizard, cast permanent mindblank, celerity, foresight...the usual...

Now remember what is usually said, there are those who rule through fear and those who rule through respect. Who said you can't have both? You can be the emperor of the world and have the respect of the people. Instead of treating them like animals, give them normal housing, fair laws, have cleric use create food and water to provide sustenance, give them a reasonable fee for working for you building your evil fortress, use golems as guards...

Do not base your whole evil enterprise around one item, the only truly loyal servant is a dominated one, thus no...no one can be trusted with what only the loyal can be trusted. If you plan to make something which is meant to be kept secret allow them no communication with the outer world, choose those that have no family that will grow up wanting revenge when they suspect you killed them...generally, a well made villain that is not meant to be killed by the PCs or the equivalent (in books and movies) will not do all those fatal mistakes they tend to do which usually end with their downfall.

[Felyndiira]

...How would you take over Campaign setting X?

Felyndiira Areanate's guide to taking over a drow house:
1) Be on good terms with the matriarch of your house. Being a favorite and loyal daughter helps quite a bit.
2) Support the ambitious female general as much as possible. If she tries to test your devotion, fall head-over-heels for it (while keeping a scroll of divine teleport hidden under that dress). Having the supposedly innocent favored daughter of the matriarch's support tends to fuel ambitions.
3) Screw the stupid drow tradition of hatred. Convince matriarch to allow you to tour the surface to "learn about the surface people so that they may better be conquered."
4) Adaptation to Daylight Feat.
5) Adventure with one or multiple parties. Be on good terms with them, and rescue them from time to time when they are in danger. You know that you've succeeded when the party elf/paladin admits that not all drow may be as bad as they first thought.
6) Have high diplomacy modifiers.
7) Gather a plethora of magical items.
8) Convince your friend(s) that your matriarch is an exemplar of an evil drow, and that she must be eliminated for the greater good. Leave out the "my matriarch" part and promise treasure.
9) Lead gullible adventurers into the underdark, rendezvous with aforementioned general, and kill the matriarch.
10) Betray the general.
11) Claim the matriarchy.
12) Escort surface comrades out nicely and give due rewards. You want to stay in good terms with readily available, overly daring idiots so that they can help you in the future should things turn sour.
13) ???
14) Profit.

The following helps maintain said matriarchy:
1) Knowing a cleric of Eilistraee (especially having one as a sister). Eilistraee's clerics (and Eilistraee herself) eats up the promotion of unity between drows and the surface races like candy, final intentions be damned. Besides, clerics of Eilistraee are quite trustworthy compared to one of Lolth, so if you can persuade them, they make very good minions.
2) Have one single son. Kill all daughters. Do it away from the aforementioned cleric of Eilistraee. Wizards are more useful and more reliable than Lolth's clerics.
3) Gather power in secret and do not start wars. Instead, provoke random conflicts between outside houses in secret, and start general chaos as long as it's away from your own house. Lolth loves random chaos. When invaded, allow the enemy to drive through some of your territories before driving them back so that you're not seen as too dominant (and thus too much of a target).
4) Deal with the surface in secret, using your adventurer friends as proxy. Obtaining readily available artifacts from the above world nets very little drow competition, and they're more plentiful then having 3/4 of your army search for that stupid Sword of Selvetarm. Who cares about a few random human slaves (which you can still obtain from secluded areas) compared to arming your entire army with +3 Flaming swords?


What kind of minions would you use?
Adventurers =D. Heroes have all the luck and all of the idiotic "willing to do anything (for money)" courage, so why antagonize them when they can be used as the perfect resource just by spending a little bit of time with then =D?


How would you avoid a horrible defeat thanks to being blind to the cliched tropes and character flaws that plague bad guys since time immemorial?
Avoid being stupid and do not take any significant actions when my WIS or INT somehow drops below 8. It's that simple.


How much manical laughter is too much?
What's manical laughter? Can I eat it?


What to do when this one group of subordinates prove to be comically incompetent?
Mind rape them, convince that they are actually from another house and that they are sent to infiltrate another other house for some unexplained reason. Grab popcorn.


And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?
A real villain doesn't really need a fortress of doom or a specially designed HQ, especially if you're not trying to take over the world with that just barely beatable CR-trapped object of taking over the world (tm). Even without metagaming spells and races, it's easy enough to take over a properly manageable area with maneuvering and a few adventurer friends.

[Ormur]

...How would you take over Campaign setting X?
I'd rally people to a really convincing cause whether I believe in it or not. Reunite the old empire, fight the monstrous races or invaders from other planes. Make people want to do your bidding, not just by enchantments and mind rape (although that's fine too). Then try to stamp out all independent power structures, for the common good of course. Churches and elven or dwarven kingdoms and even druids must be reigned in. Maybe promote one suitable state religion and limit the rest to providing needed services.


What kind of minions would you use?
I'd try to be inclusive. It's fine buying the services of goblins and monsters but if that's all you do people will get suspicious. Have a bunch of evil people of all the standard races and preferably even deluded good and neutral people. I'm sure there are some evil elves, dwarfs and gnomes out there somewhere.


How would you avoid a horrible defeat thanks to being blind to the cliched tropes and character flaws that plague bad guys since time immemorial?
Being rational is probably the best way. I probably have this goal of ruling the world/gaining ultimate power/whatever and I should strive for that while knowing my limitations and being prepared to change the plan when things go wrong. I'd have to be self-conscious. I may want to take over the world because of some complexes and childhood traumas and that's fine but I should be able to recognize it.


How much manical laughter is too much?
Doing it in private is fine to let of steam but in the open it might make people question your "honorable" motives. I guess that's straight from the evil overlord list.


What to do when this one group of subordinates prove to be comically incompetent?
Make them court jesters or something. Executions are for subversives, persecuted minorities and PC's. Employers should try to limit turnover.


And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?
In the public is should be a work of art. Full of marble, flowers and perhaps culturally significant items plundered from enemy states. Destroying it would be a crime. But the sanctum sanctum should be in a demiplane or something equally unreachable.

[Rixx]

I think a key to being an undefeatable villain would be to stay constantly on the move - make sure that nobody knows where you really are. If you have a huge stronghold where you live, that gives your enemies plenty of time to plan a full-scale assault.

Body doubles and decoys are a must, too. Let your enemies THINK they have you defeated, and then strike back with deadly force while they're celebrating and completely off-guard.

[Thoughtbot360]

If I was just Evil Evil Wants To Rule The World 'Cause My Parents Never Loved Me Enough (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmm-1LZE03k#t=5m14s)

Poor Florence.

[Hat-Trick]

Be a level 20 Fighter with a level 20 Wizard friend willing to create a sword that can defeat mages in one swing, then commence ruining the economy by stealing and destroying all gold, silver, copper, and platinum I can get my hands on. For minions, it doesn't matter as long as they have higher move silently and hide checks than any adventurer who try to stop me. The wizard friend would probably have to arm them with equipment to nullify any defenses that might spring up.

Control? Why? Society sucks, I'm overhauling it.

[Berserk Monk]

I'd just kill people without hesitation. Won't answer my questions during an interrogation, I chop your head off. I'd never take prisoners that could escape. They'd be immediately executed, unless, there's a hefty ransom, in which case I'd make sure the person could later come back to bite me or escape so I'd cripple them.

[JonestheSpy]

Rely on economic rather than military domination.

Secretly foster the occasional abuse through secret channels, so I can slap down the occasional sacrificial goat and look good doing it.

Hire a ton of bards to spread my propaganda - but not so many that it's obnoxoius and ultimately unbelievable.

Any foes that are serious enough to be a threat would have quiet accidents that have absolutely nothing to do with me.

Fight that, Dudley Doright!

[Ganurath]

1. Be an epic level Green Star Adept who knows Awaken Construct, Genesis, Wall of Stone, and Polymorph Any Object.

2. Make a bunch of demiplanes.

3. Make a bunch of effigies of humanoids, five four each demiplane.

4. Awaken the effigies.

5. Teach the effigies to use the resources on the demiplane they're assigned to in order to develop their abilities, using the following process:


5a. Summon a creature.

5b. Sparring partner uses buffs and slams to kill creature.

5c. Summoner heals buffed guy. Summoner and buff switch roles.

5d. If neccesary, remaining three will intervene.

5e. Sparring effigies gain XP through combat due to having gained a better understanding of magic and their abilities.

6. Provide each demiplane with a library of spells to work off, with a preset curriculum for each effigy.

7. When effigies reach sufficient level, have each create a new demiplane of their own to supervise, with abandoned demiplanes being used as libraries for new/old spells.

8. Continue pyramid scheme until you have an epic wizard for each member of the Material Plane's population.

9. Spread the word down the line to use the custom spell that was developed off of Flesh to Stone, Fabricate, and Awaken Construct to turn all the natives of the Material Plane into new, untrained effigies, which would be privately tutored.

10. Continue moving upward in planar difficulty until you're ready for Asmodeus.

[BloodyAngel]

...completely enthrall me with your story.

Glad you enjoyed it. That was a hell of an awesome game. I've tried a few times since to play a manipulative bastard like my old elven enchanter, but alas... good political games with open-minded DM's are hard to come by.

The really hilarious part of it was, save the mind control to force the king's assassination, I didn't use a single spell on the other major player in the story, or my fellow PC's. Just a whole lot of roleplaying, and a bunch of bluff and diplomacy to keep the npc's at bay. :smallbiggrin:

[Doresain]

Use an insanely powerful, randomly powered mecha from the future that I found in a junk yard and rebuilt using scrap parts. Cause immense amounts of collateral damage while fighting off 'the monster of the week' all while claiming to be the good guy in order to keep anyone else on the planet from being able to assemble something that can challenge me. Wait until heroes from another planet assume I'm evil and attack with their combining, defeat them and when their arch nemesis comes around congratulating me for being evil. I then forcibly combine the heroes' mecha with my own, and fire their ultimate weapon, destablized due to my mangling of their mechs, and destroy the universe.

is that some MegasXLR?

[Gamerlord]

I would corrupt the heroes, granting me a steady stream of minions, plus if I can get the heroes to fall into darkness, it doesn't matter If I die because those adventures will have had to become evil to slay me so therefore I just unleashed at least 4 well-armed, high-level people upon the campaign setting.

And in terms of HQs I prefer anywhere that makes a fight as one-sided to my advantage as possible.

[Ravens_cry]

For one thing adhere to the overlord's bible (http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html), then appear to be the good guy while I gain power. Be a wizard, cast permanent mindblank, celerity, foresight...the usual...

Now remember what is usually said, there are those who rule through fear and those who rule through respect. Who said you can't have both? You can be the emperor of the world and have the respect of the people. Instead of treating them like animals, give them normal housing, fair laws, have cleric use create food and water to provide sustenance, give them a reasonable fee for working for you building your evil fortress, use golems as guards...

Do not base your whole evil enterprise around one item, the only truly loyal servant is a dominated one, thus no...no one can be trusted with what only the loyal can be trusted. If you plan to make something which is meant to be kept secret allow them no communication with the outer world, choose those that have no family that will grow up wanting revenge when they suspect you killed them...generally, a well made villain that is not meant to be killed by the PCs or the equivalent (in books and movies) will not do all those fatal mistakes they tend to do which usually end with their downfall.
Amen to that. For a while, I still think about it now and then, I was going to do a webcomic based on a world where there was an Evil Overlord who followed the list and won. Hundreds of years later details some of the changes arisen from that. For example, since healing spells are usually 'Good', medicine of a scientific sort had to advance. Evil has also mellowed out a bit, priests wear big shoulder pads with spikes, but not too sharp, don't want anyone to get hurt, and red and black predominate as colours, but pink is ok, as that's just a kind of red. . .right? Things are more egalitarian, as there is not much distinction between monstrous and 'normal' humanoids. Good is still severally frowned upon, but no one said Evil couldn't be nice. But it would have been too much for a first project of that nature, so now it's back burner.

[Fawsto]

Id personaly make this (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilOverlordList) my guidebook in every situation. Hells, I would sleep with this under my pilow! Do not forget to take the valumes 2 and 3. :smallcool:

edit: wow... The Ninja's attack!

[PairO'Dice Lost]

My reasoning is quite simple: Palpatine had a great thing going with the whole "clone army" idea, he just didn't go far enough.

Steps to Ultimate PowerTM:

Become a powerful psion (erudite 10/metamind 10 using the Spell to Power variant) and turn myself into a spectral savant (Complete Psionic, essentially a psionic vampire/lich thingy).
The two key abilities of the spectral savant are the ability to drain PP from creatures with PP or psi-like abilities (this is the only way it regains PP, and its PP pool has no upper limit), and the usual undead traits/energy drain power suite.
Become a minor noble. Work as hard as possible to make life for the peasants wonderful, and be sure to become popular and well-loved (while hiding my undead nature, of course).
Find and capture a fairly weak creature with high-ML psi-like abilities for siphoning power from (the Temporal Filcher is CR 3 with ML 8, and easily contained); use fission to create a duplicate who will do nothing with his actions but constantly siphon the filcher's psi-like abilities into PP. He and I both use Font of Power and temporal reiteration to keep him independent and active forever.
Manifest mind seed on a level 1 commoner who won't be missed; over the course of a week, he will become a copy of me, an erudite 2/metamind 10. (If later levels must be lost first, I can simply become higher level to ensure he has 10 metamind levels.)
When the commoner has become essentially me, I will manifest psionic dominate on him and make him activate Font of Power, using temporal reiteration to keep it going indefinitely. Not only will any buffs he uses have an unlimited duration, my mind-control is also of unlimited duration. I'll be sure to cast 5 or 6 more on him in case of dispelling or counter-mind-control; sure, he's me mentally, but I certainly know better than to trust myself to be a good little lackey!
I will have acquired enough information on the commoner (through clairsentience and mind-reading) to ensure that when he does return home a week later he acts exactly as he did before being mind seeded.
I'll equip this duplicate of me with whichever counter-tactic to antimagic and disjunction strikes me as best in this situation to ensure I never lose control and he never loses his buffs.
Each week, I do the same to another person who won't be missed, using existing mental clones to cover up absences in order to work my way up the power chain.
Each time I mind seed someone, my fissioned duplicate uses bestow power to grant me all the PP he has absorbed (which, assuming a solid 24 hours of siphoning, should be 76,800 PP). Yeah, I have practically infinite PP from Font of Power + temporal reiteration, but this is a contingency plan. Plus, sucking the mental powers out of a little creature is a relaxing pastime for my LE duplicate, and he should have fun.
When I have seeded a bunch of people (say, a dozen or so mental clones), I begin establishing a telepathic network using various powers that allow me to communicate with my mental clones, share their senses, etc.
When I have expanded my network to encompass the entire area I rule, my mental clones begin going out and capturing low-level adventurers to be added--they can't do it themselves thanks to diminishing returns--which both gains me new bodies and removes potential threats.
Next, I make allies of a bunch of quells, LE incorporeal undead who can cut off divine power. Being a LE incorporeal undead myself, I think they'd support me; if not, I have around a hundred mental clones who can cast control undead thanks to Spell to Power, so loyalty shouldn't be a problem. Using enough of them, divine spellcasters either dispelling anything or rebuking me won't be a problem anymore.
Eventually, the last people in the world able to resist me are high-level arcane casters. Even a 20th-level arcane caster can't resist hundreds of what amount to 12th-level psion//wizards with all possible buffs on them, since they're practically immune to most of the wizard's tricks and can counter the wizard's defenses.
Why was becoming a spectral savant important, you ask? Well, partly to persuade the quell to aid me, partly for the undead traits, but mostly for energy drain. If I encounter a creature immune to mind-affecting effects, I can simply undeadify it and control undead it. If I then encounter a creature immune to both [mind-affecting] and [death] effects, I can use these undead mooks to take care of it instead of risking one of myselves.
Today, the Prime...tomorrow, the multiverse! Once the Prime is mine, I'll go for the planes, either cloning or undeadifying anyone and anything that stands in my path. Full half of my clones will be put on binding duty, calling outsiders and turning them into clones, while the other half travels to the planes to add Prime refugees or outsiders I can't call to the collective.

So essentially I don't take over the multiverse, I take in the multiverse and become a plane-spanning practically-invulnerable hive mind. Borg-errific.

[Hawriel]

I would be exactly like Batman/Bruce Wyne. He pritty much is Lex Luthor Exept he keeps is paranoid crazy in check.

[The Gilded Duke]

I am in awe Dice.
Where is the Spell to Power variant found though?
Do you also have a way to get around the xp requirements of mind seed?

I think I'll try a setting specific one.
Eberron.

Standard Rakshasa with Cloak of Khyber.

Move to Thrane. While in a long established human form convert to the worship of the Silver Flame. Use your always on mind reading ability to help you advance, as well as traditional charm spells, and an already decent diplomacy check.

Get placed as one of the assistants to Pontiff Jaela. Learn more about her and get her to trust you. Read her mind when you can. Lure her away from her cathedral and then kill her and scalp her. Take her place and resume normal duties as Pontiff of the Silver Flame.

Meet regularly with the powerless Queen Diani. Let slip that you plan to restore the power of the Monarchy, and discuss with her how best the transfer of power might be performed. Diplomacy her up to helpful.

Publicly announce the dissolution of the Theocracy and the Inquisition. Reinstate the the royal line and place Queen Diani on the throne. Leave Queen Diani to run Thrane from day to day. But stop by every once in a while to give her the occasional suggestion.

Emphasize the Church's mission to help the poor, and apologize for church actions against the Shifter populations. Focus the Inquisition on discovering more information on possible Rakshasa voices coming through the Silver Flame, and possible Rakshasa actions and plots in the Demon Wastes.
Don't replace any Inquisitors who die in the process.

Go on a formal visiting tour throughout Khorovoire, meeting with local congregations and with national leaders. Help negotiate disputes between nations.

Wait until an outside force threatens the Nations of Khorovoire (It is Eberron, it shouldn't take long). Speak out in favor of strong alliances between nations and the eventual re-establishment of the central Galifar government.

Have the church purchase a Simulacrum scroll. Keep working towards peace and unification for another ten to twenty years. Set up a few political marriages. Make sure to keep in touch and visit the children regularly.

Create a Simulacrum of pontiff Jaela. Burn her in the Silver Flame. Kill the heir to the throne of Galifar. Take the place of the the heir.

Rule as emperor. Mourn the death of your good friend and inspiration Pontiff Jaela. Start a private order of Diviners and Malkonvokers. Have them research the names of other Raksasha and then bind the Raksasha. Keep their stats low through Lesser Geas or Charisma Drain. Never let them out.

Research any other claims of outsider influence, and deal with them accordingly.

Get married. Make sure the wife has some children.

After some years pass, kill your heir and take their place.

Provide funding to the Gatekeeper druids and prepare for the eventual Delkyr invasion. You have some time though, so no rush.

[quick_comment]

So essentially I don't take over the multiverse, I take in the multiverse and become a plane-spanning practically-invulnerable hive mind. Borg-errific.

What do you do about the planes with impeded clarisentience? Also, epic wizards that use wish to summon you to their killing room, after their divinations reveal you?

[Mikeavelli]

1. We all know diplomacy roles are set DC's, so anyone sufficiently diplomatic is capable of turning even their worst enemies into fanatical followers.

2. We also know the Exemplar class allows us to substitute any other skill for diplomacy.

3. Lastly, we know it's possible to pimp almost every skill in the game out to obscene levels, so our options are fairly limitless, including the infamous jumplomancer (inspiring awe by jumping for a minute straight!) - Or Don Juan (Peform(sex) your way to world domination).

But, for true style and grace, I would dominate the world through the Power of Perform(Rock).

[oxinabox]

I would be the spider, hiding, scrying everywhere to keep track of my many webs.

My minions would be doppelgangers.
Doppelganger Beguilers, to walk in to towns, kill the mayor (without anyone seeing), the lord, whatever.
and take full control of the town. imitating the lord so everyone is unaware.

Doppelganger Factotums, (with maxed out bluff) to move in.
and replace the PC's / Heros or anyone i though had alot of power.
Replace them.
A decent lvl doppelganger factotum can do almost anything anyone else can do. so it would be hard to catch them out.

Eventally i may replace whole cities with dopplegangers.
This would require many many dopplegangers, mahaps i start a breeding program...


I myself would take a vow of peace (BoED), as lawful evil, I could lawyer my way way around the good requirement, and lawyer round the not killing anybody by haviong my minions do it.
(like the pirate in Waterworld)

[Roderick_BR]

Kill the heroes yourself. No sissy deathtraps with easy escape routes.
The problem is finding out WHO are the heroes. I mean, take Forgotten Realms, for example, where you find high level adventurers every corner. Heroes are not a handful of low level explorers in the corner of the main city. They are everywhere.
Yes, you wasted your precious time killing a bunch of 1st level starting adventurers. Only thousands more to go. Then look for the 2nd level ones. And so on.

Now, creating a large information network to find out the adventurers that looks like they'll survive after the next orc raid, see if they'd be willing to work for you, or if you should send a (very) high level extermination squad to take care of it.

Then look for the Evil Overlord lists around the internet http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

[Carden]

First off, I would start as a binder. This would come with the challenge of being viewed as a heretic, but overcoming that would be easy. As I slowly formed my reputation into a truly epic and upstanding status, I'd broker shaky peace deals between all the major nations and the races. Those who were too deep-seated in their prejudice, well, it's not like I was doing this for peace, at least I could say I tired. Then I would "retire".

I would then find my way to befriending a bunch of changelings and doppelgangers. I would break these into as many groups as there were current large nations. Each group would consist of a strike force and many mooks. The captains would be informed of my plans and the rest would spread out and lay low 'till a signal was given.

Group A would invade and take over the shakiest of the nations, one seen by all as a troublemaker. Probably a human country for this. They would impersonate the leaders and start a mindless, under-cover war. This would unite the other nations against them. Needless to say, here come the snooping adventurers.

The "Good Guys" will most certainly be brought to the front-lines. This is good, because I would use the concerted effort and near endless confusion to have my other teams impersonate the entire courts and aristocracies of the other kingdoms. They will keep the war going, and they will kill Group A. Hopefully, some adventurer's will be there and I will meet them. When they notice the bodies are doppelgangers, I'll explain using my massive Charisma and topped off Bluff skill how the leaders must still be out there and these were just their changeling cronies, used to divert attention as they escaped. I'll help them, "Hunt down those pansy war-mongers."

Me and Adventuring Team Most Likely to Kill Me Later will run directly towards the trail I had pre-laid, that is, into a cave full of my highest level allies. Between me and them, no adventurer escapes alive, except, of course, their doppelganger imitations.

Now that most of the countries are mine and no adventuring group stands between me and my highest goal, I begin research. I study ancient clerical records, attempting to find a god of gods (think Ao) to bind. I would also study the magic of Incarnum to bind more of something's essence to my body. My generals would be ruling the world while I did this, building up my reputation as the "Man Who Gave the World Peace" and other inane nonsense. They'd also be starting me a cult of my own, but one dedicated to peace.

Using a combination of Pact magic, Incarnum, and ancient lore, I would EVENTUALLY find a way to either bind a dead god of gods and tie its divine essence to my own soul and body or kill one and then bind it to me in such a fashion. This combined with my Material-Plane-bound worshipers would give me plenty of divinity, but, of course, I would want more. I would have my countries start rounding people up for false crimes and use them as un-willing sacrifices to me. Thus, as I took down other gods' power-base, I would strengthen my own.

I'm rather glad my group is mostly unaware of this site, because up until the adventuring party getting killed, this is totally my current villain's plan. Well, after that is what he would LIKE to happen, but I don't think that'd be fair to my players.

[DragonBaneDM]

Oh, hurro there.

I dunno if anyone's brought this to attention yet because I am too lazy to read all the posts, but...

http://www.screwattack.com/node/26526

Enjoy!

[Bob the Urgh]

Adaptibility is the key word here. If the original plan is failing, time to hit the drawing board.

[oxinabox]

So essentially I don't take over the multiverse, I take in the multiverse and become a plane-spanning practically-invulnerable hive mind. Borg-errific.

THis is excellent.

[Kris Strife]

is that some MegasXLR?

Yes. That was taken from the plot of the first episode with the S-Force... Except, I'd be intentionally firing the universe destroying hole. I'd then remove the heroes' mechs from mine, and fly at full speed away from the hole so I can be the last thing sucked in, or possibly avoid it and be outside the universe, leaving me as quite possibly the only force left, barring some kind of omnipotent creator, which I might then have to find someway to deal with. I would then see if I already had or develop the ability to create and alter matter with my thoughts, there by creating a new universe with me as its lord and master!

And yes, I'd have my most prized possessions in the robot with me at the time.

Or I might look for the alternate universe made out of philly cheese steaks... which ever.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

I am in awe Dice.
Where is the Spell to Power variant found though?
Do you also have a way to get around the xp requirements of mind seed?

Thanks. Spell to Power is in Mind's Eye Expanded Classes IV on the WotC site. There are a couple ways around the XP cost, and while I'm breaking things with temporal reiteration, I might as well use the thought bottle. It actually works out pretty well, flavor-wise: I pour a bit of myself into the thought bottle, then pour a bit of myself into someone else, then drink from the bottle, and all is well.


What do you do about the planes with impeded clarisentience? Also, epic wizards that use wish to summon you to their killing room, after their divinations reveal you?

Clairsentience is basically irrelevant after the first town. I only need it to find out victims' habits to avoid giving the game away, but after I've taken over everyone there, I'll be grabbing people from outside who were traveling, and it's much easier to explain a week's delay than to explain why they disappeared for a week in the first place.

Looking more closely at the mind seed rules, I'd definitely need to be erudite 18/metamind 10, so I'd be epic as well. Any low-epic caster I could take on myself; I have as much time as necessary to research epic spells/powers, since mind seeding takes a single standard action and I doubt I'd be using it more than a handful of times each day once I get established. Anyone more powerful than that, I'd try to work out some kind of deal to leave them and their close friends alone--I already have the Prime, so skipping even a thousand people for the sake of alliance is no trouble at all.

[KillianHawkeye]

And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?

Based on all the videogames I played in my childhood, I'd say the best villainous lair would be a nigh impenetrable fortress that's nearly completely covered/filled with spikes that cause instant death, combined with traps that transport intruders back to the entrance. There should also be turrets all over the place which mess up the hero's jumps but don't cause him to become temporarily invulnerable when he gets hit. There also needs to be a lava section, an ice section, an underwater section, and a section that's completely dark (all still filled with turrets and spikes).

Add in some crushing press traps that block the way forward and leave nowhere to go but into the spikes or be splatted, a few force fields controlled by switches in remote locations that are insanely difficult to reach, and a room where you have to fight all the previous bosses (all at once instead of one by one), and that about does it. :smallwink::smallamused::smallbiggrin:



I'm suddenly wishing there was an evilgrin smiley.

[Umael]

Glad you enjoyed it. That was a hell of an awesome game. I've tried a few times since to play a manipulative bastard like my old elven enchanter, but alas... good political games with open-minded DM's are hard to come by.

The really hilarious part of it was, save the mind control to force the king's assassination, I didn't use a single spell on the other major player in the story, or my fellow PC's. Just a whole lot of roleplaying, and a bunch of bluff and diplomacy to keep the npc's at bay. :smallbiggrin:

...would you be interested in moving to Oregon? Maybe? Possibly? Please?

[Cyclocone]

Be a Warforged Wizard and get "English with thick Austrian accent" as a bonus language, then start my Evil World Domination Scheme.

When the heroes show up at my HQ lookin for the final fight, i'll just cast Teleport Through Time and kill them while they're still level one.

"Fakkk u!!" *casts Chained Enervation*.

[Fastmover]

http://www.proft.org/tips/evil.html

nuff said

[kemmotar]

switches in remote locations that are insanely difficult to reach

why?

Make a tower made of adamantite, no doors, no windows, the whole of the outside is covered with spikes and antimagic fields as well as the inside except for the only room that also has no entrance and is surrounded by 2 metres thick adamantite walls...The tower is solid and rooted deep underground ...in the middle of the room is a customized(customized as in it doesn't affect you alone and transports only the physical body [ie no gear for anyone who just got teleported]) teleportation circle which operates on everyone apart from you. It teleports anyone else stepping in it to the far realm or perhaps, the chamber of some incredibly vicious demon lord that would rather ask your entrails why you were there...

Ward the room against incoming teleportation except for when you come in. Any teleportation is automatically directed onto the teleportation circle. In the room you also have a bottle of air constantly supplying you with air and dining utensils with a permanent create food and water...

If you wanna be really paranoid, make the tower yourself (fabricate?) make the teleportation circle yourself.

Let's see the adventurers kill you in your sleep or sneak into your tower now...

EDIT: and keep in mind this is not an optimized way...who was it that had made a guide for wizards so they could have a lair where no one could ever ever enter it? Something about the astral plane and lots of other things...

[Kris Strife]

I'm suddenly wishing there was an evilgrin smiley.

:belkar::xykon::nale::redcloak: take your pick.

as for lair: an impressive, evil looking tower with a very obvious trap door out in front. The trap door opens onto a mile deep drop, into a pool of the highest melting point metal that exists/can be made. The entire pit is diamond walled, and kept as smooth as possible. The Tower door is extremly difficult to open, and when opened, leads to a maze that covers the entirety of the tower, and leads eventually to a door at the top that opens onto empty space. Aside from traps and monsters, said tower is completely empty.

Where are you? A small hatch opens up half a mile down the empty part of the trap door pit, extends a tube you can walk down, with an elevator leading to the surface. Said hatch, tube and elevator can only operate from the inside or a special remote control, and requires a fingerprint match, retinal scan, voice check and biometrics to work, and the remote auto fails if you're inside your lair already.

[KillianHawkeye]

why?

Because it's based on video games instead of D&D.

And because a villain's purpose is to be defeated by heroes, so it has to at least be possible to breach my security. Nobody ever said it had to be easy, though. That's okay, because the heroes have infinite continues. :smallwink:

[BloodyAngel]

...would you be interested in moving to Oregon? Maybe? Possibly? Please?

Heh. I'm pretty settled in here. But I'm always up for a pbp game or two? :smallwink:

[Umael]

Heh. I'm pretty settled in here. But I'm always up for a pbp game or two? :smallwink:

That's the second attempt to lure me into the world of PbP.

Stop that. I'm being tempted.

[Kris Strife]

That's the second attempt to lure me into the world of PbP.

Stop that. I'm being tempted.

Come... Join us... You won't have to provide food for the other players and BO can't be transmitted via the internet!

[Umael]

Come... Join us... You won't have to provide food for the other players and BO can't be transmitted via the internet!

Hey! I shower dai- oh, carp, you meant the other players, didn't you?

Seriously though... I'd consider it. Maybe. Depends on how well I knew the group and who would be running it and what the game would be and all that.

[BloodyAngel]

It's always worth a try. The upside is it allows for more description and in-depth details than most live games, as well as being at a more relaxed pace, usually. Updating once a day is about standard.

The downside? It takes a long time to get anywhere, alas... But much fun can still be had. I've been in a superheroes game on these forums that's lasted about two years. We've gained and lost players, and we even switched DM's for a while... but it's still going. :smallbiggrin:

If you ever DO want to give pbp a try, send me a PM. I'd like to play or run something new... once I can find the free time to do so.

[Callos_DeTerran]

What kind of minions would you use?

That depends on the situation. I'm very fond of cultists (class levels, whoo!), tsochari (Body horror, whoo!), Chuuls (living tanks, whoo!), and devils (soul bargains, whoo!) as minions because each have their own special uses.


How would you avoid a horrible defeat thanks to being blind to the cliched tropes and character flaws that plague bad guys since time immemorial?

Simple, don't try so hard to avoid them. Embrace them, revel in them, then when the heroes try to use the 'weaknesses' against you, strike! Just because it's cliched trope doesn't mean it's bad. The heroes will be so big looking for the twist or dramatic reveal to show the doomsday ritual to end the world isn't what it looks like to...well...stop the doomsday ritual.


Also, become a favored minion of Demogorgon or Asmodeus. Both have the power, and intellect to see a valuable minion when one is there, to save your keister if the going gets tough. Just don't get ambitious and try to supplant them. It will only end in your tears.



How much manical laughter is too much?

When it interrupts your evil monologues at the wrong moments, it's too much.



What to do when this one group of subordinates prove to be comically incompetent?

Make sure they know nothing valuable (or have anything valuable) then send them to join the heroes. Let them deal with the incompetence...especially with the incompetent lackeys sucking up XP. Eventually the players will solve the problem for you, one way or the other.


And, most importantly, just what are the qualities of a good villainous HQ, anyway?

Wrenched from the ground by an unholy ritual. Screams of the tortured and damned echoing through-out the complex. Decorations made FROM the heroes' loved ones. Black and spiky is always good. Needs some escape tunnels and if your really paranoid, make the entire HQ into a trap for the heroes. No, not as a side-product, literally. Make it a trap for the heroes then make yourself a load-bearing boss just as icing on the cake if you happen to be in the death-trap with them.

Remember evil kiddies, the goal of a villain is to win. The goal of a good villain is to always be remembered as the ultimate evil. If you win doing it, that's just better.

[waterpenguin43]

Get greater invisibility, scry, teleport, and silence, stalk the heroes, when they go to rest, coup de grace the sleeping dudes, if the guard can see invisibility, use silence, then kill him before he can awaken the others.
After that, raise you're army with enchantments and conquer small towns, growing larger until you can conquer entire bastions of good.

[Crafty Cultist]

A few ideas:

winged feral insectile four-armed sauhgin effigies: clockwork soldiers effective on land, air or sea; market price 6000gp

stronghold builders guidebook has rules for flying strongholds; covered in automated turrets that fire magic missiles + cannons that fire fireballs. rain doom from the skies(mwahahaha)

also make yourself into a magic item: built in effects to enhance your omnipotence

[Randel]

1). find a way to level up quickly, regularly and safely. Kill monsters for combat XP, always roleplay for roleplay XP and if there is one of those feats or ceremonies that let you extract XP from magic items or something then do that as well... preferably using the Heros magic items.

2). Make yourself look like a good guy. Have a shiny white castle, wear bright colors (provided they don't give you a tactical disadvantage), and always give the illusion that you're helping people while you gain power.

3). Keep your subordinates content. While it may not be possible to always be loved and fear is a good way to keep people under control, don't go so far as to be hated. If a spellcaster, then have healing spells or other tricks to show how 'good' you are. Infinite food making magic items allow you to keep the masses content so that no matter how horrible your economic policy then it won't go so far as to make people starve.

4). Always have a scapegoat or be quick to label someone else as the villain. Oh, your actions and policies have resulted in the death of millions and a huge conspiracy has been unearthed? Blame it on your royal advisor! You're just the trusting, well-meaning king of the realm... its that nasty advisor who tricked you into using goblin babies as fuel for your elixer of life!

5). Also, be sure to keep the monstrous races (like goblins and others that you know you can push around) in a state of poverty. Keep giving them handouts to show your generocity (just enough that they don't starve) but don't let them form independent communities. They will keep raiding farmlands and cause trouble because they really don't have anything else to do and you'll be be 'forced to' enlist heros to 'solve' the goblin problem.

However, if some other evil overlord tries to take over your kingdom then send out diplomats and bear gifts to the goblins and enlist their help to fight your enemy with the promise of land if they help. You'll save casualties on your army while the goblins fight and they will fight harder to prove themselves worthy to get land... make sure its the land of the overlord you're fighting.

6). Get the heros to do your dirty work, but not too much. This is DnD so you want to have as many levels as you can so you can at least defend yourself incase someone attacks you. Sure, you want to have guards and stuff to protect you but keep in mind that you are your own last line of defense... unless you've got a bunch of followers who are willing to go through hell to resurrect you if things go south in which case they are the line of defense after the last one. Any plan that involves you dying had better have some good planning on the resurrection bit.

7). Be ready to bribe your way to victory. Adventurers like fancy toys, if you find a bunch of great upstart heros are clearing out your enemies then be sure to help them out by giving them magic items and fancy homes or castles or somesuch. Don't make it look like your bribing them, let them know its a 'reward' for all the 'good they did'. However, if they start getting uppity and it looks like they might try taking your throne from you then send them to the Tomb of Horrors... ask them to kill the lich, or retrieve some magic dodad that might be there. If by some miracle one of them survives then shower him in jewels and give him a feast... then send your secret army of ninja wights into his bedroom and level-drain the crap out of him. Blame the Tomb of Horrors guy if he survives that.

8). Also, go for immortality. It would be preferable to have a sort of eternal youth or beauty thing going, but if thats not possible then you could try for a senile-old-kindly-king look. Lichdom is probably a good idea for the regeneration but undeath has its disadvantages (like the inability to taste coffee). Reincarnation might be the best way to go about it since you can effectively keep at it forever if you're careful.

Note that if you go for the reincarnation route then you will either want to arrange to keep yourself in power through each incarnation or set up your kingdom so that after your former life is over you can just start anew and regain everything quickly.

Heck, if you really want to be sneaky, you could arrange to get reincarneted every time you die and then just pretend like you don't remember your past lives. People will think that you're some kind of... avatar or the earth or something instead of a druid thats been casting contingency spells on himself. Cue adventurers going on quests to find you and put you on the throne.

[Yrcrazypa]

Well, I suppose eventually.
Wow. I didn't even really think about Palpatine as I wrote that.

Just goes to show you how ingrained Star Wars is in my mind and thoughts.

That's because it is one of the best ways to do it. If you want to have an army to take over the world with, you'd best bet you want them to be treated well so that they prefer you over anyone else. If you are one of the stereotypical villains who beat/kill their minions for messing up, or bringing news of a mess up, you will very quickly run out of loyal minions.