Elan is obviously a spy...

[multilis]

Even a really dumb person knows that you don't pay *more* gold than offered. Elan is obviously faking his foolishness, therefore he is part of a secret clever plot. He gets a happy ending because he is part of the winning side first rather than OOTS.

I suspect Haley is involved, someone got to her first, bribing her with gold, then she used her secret *seductress* powers to control Elan.

In turn Haley was more likely approached by a certain Raven. The raven has more money than is believable, even paid for own oracle reading, signs of a secret double life. As a flier would be perfect agent, and the dislike of V would mean low loyalty. And the taint of the puppet master makes the raven hard to remember.

In turn the puppet master:

Snarl! He has an <inner> planet worth of gold to bribe with and motive (kill gods so they can't destroy him by destroying world). Snarl's avatar may be Mr. Scruffy, a secret known only the the evil raven.

[Acero]

oooooooooooor. he could just be an idiot.:smallbiggrin:

it has been stated that he a almost no Wisdom score, and it is safe to say he has fairly low INT.

[Katana_Geldar]

Yeah, you're crediting Elan with far too much intelligence.

[Emanick]

I love how, in pretending to criticize this comic, you made fun of peoples' reactions to two recent ones. :smallbiggrin:

[Silverraptor]

Elan's sapping my sentry!

[Assassin89]

Elan's sapping my sentry!
Here's what Elan has that several dwarfs don't. A functioning liver, depth perception, and a pulse.

Also, Elan does not go off to visit someone's mother, he does not have murdering people as a deadly skill.

*several spy domination audio clips (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwYu8LAmNvg) later*

In addition, Elan is genre savvy, meaning that he may know the fate of spies when they are no longer needed, as he would probably be unmade by the Snarl first when the Snarl accomplishes its goals.

[ericgrau]

Wait a second, Elan was doing relatively well when he was back on that ship. Now he's turning stupid again after the OotS reunites?

[Kish]

When was he doing relatively well? When he neglected to tell Durkon and Vaarsuvius about the attacking trolls until they'd gotten everything else out of the way first? When he claimed piranhas ate Kubota, armor and all? Oh, I know, when he covered one of his eyes with an eyepatch to look badass!

Elan's idiocy is like Belkar's evil. Some people take every strip which doesn't drive home with tremendous force that he's an idiot as proof that he's suddenly become smart. Then they're surprised by the next strip that highlights the fact that Elan is still an idiot.

[Liwen]

He his a man in presence of his lady, who just donned a sexier suit she's going to wear all day from now on. He wanted to impress Haley by showing off how good he can be. Most men get a -6 penalty to Wisdom and Intelligence in presence of cleavage. It's not their fault, sexual instincts are hard to overcome.

So give Elan a chance would you?

[Elfin]

:smallsigh:
*facepalm*


Well, at least this isn't a "morally justified" thread.
There's always a silver lining. :smalltongue:

[Kaytara]

Elan's idiocy is like Belkar's evil. Some people take every strip which doesn't drive home with tremendous force that he's an idiot as proof that he's suddenly become smart. Then they're surprised by the next strip that highlights the fact that Elan is still an idiot.

Well-said.

Though I'm honestly not sure if this thread is supposed to be serious...XD We should start a humourous crackpot theories thread, we haven't had one of those in a while. :smallbiggrin:

[Ancalagon]

Though I'm honestly not sure if this thread is supposed to be serious...

Not sure? I think it's obviously the attempt to make a yet another not-serious-theory-joke. This forum REALLY needs more of those - why didn't anyone have that idea before. ;)

[GallóglachMaxim]

He his a man in presence of his lady, who just donned a sexier suit she's going to wear all day from now on. He wanted to impress Haley by showing off how good he can be. Most men get a -6 penalty to Wisdom and Intelligence in presence of cleavage.

This, all over. Of course he was smarter on the boat, no attractive woman-based circumstance penalties.

[Weimann]

You'd think that between his childishness and his (proven) woman savvyness, he'd not suffer too much from that.

Of course, it's not just a woman, it's Haley. That could play in.

[Zolkabro]

Even a really dumb person knows that you don't pay *more* gold than offered. Elan is obviously faking his foolishness, therefore he is part of a secret clever plot. He gets a happy ending because he is part of the winning side first rather than OOTS.

I suspect Haley is involved, someone got to her first, bribing her with gold, then she used her secret *seductress* powers to control Elan.

In turn Haley was more likely approached by a certain Raven. The raven has more money than is believable, even paid for own oracle reading, signs of a secret double life. As a flier would be perfect agent, and the dislike of V would mean low loyalty. And the taint of the puppet master makes the raven hard to remember.

In turn the puppet master:

Snarl! He has an <inner> planet worth of gold to bribe with and motive (kill gods so they can't destroy him by destroying world). Snarl's avatar may be Mr. Scruffy, a secret known only the the evil raven.

This is the most ridiculous thing I have heard on the forums, and I've been here a while. Some ideas are unlikely, while this one is plain stupid.

And that's why I love it!

It's obvious your not being serious.

[Spiky]

To me, the dumbest thing he does is select a belt that enhances the one stat he does not need enhanced. Sure, a little more can never hurt, but when there are such failings elsewhere?

Didn't they have a Belt of Wisdom laying around? Or at least some old fashioned hp protection.

[Shale]

As a bard, he doesn't need it enhanced. As a Dashing Swordsman? More charisma means more damage per attack. It's like a fighter buffing strength - more of it will always come in handy.

Ironically, it will also improve his bartering checks.

[Kish]

I am mystified by both the preceding posts. Elan wanting his Charisma enhanced is one of the most power-gamey things any of the Order has ever done. It doesn't matter that he has so much of it, his spells and most of his bard abilities turn on it, and each +2--without limit--gives him another bonus spell.

Vaarsuvius' Strength, arguably Wisdom, and Charisma also range from bad to horrible, but would you be surprised and critical if s/he bought a belt of Intelligence?

[Ahp77]

If he was betraying a good party of adventurers, wouldn't that make him evil? Since we have seen how his brain works when Nale betrayed him, we know that mommy would cry.

[Kaytara]

He needs it enhanced as a Dashing Swordsman AND as a bard. The strength of his bard spells and such directly relates to his CHA. The higher it is, the better.

Now, it WOULD be funny and dumb (and entirely believable) if we found out that Elan already has another item that gives him an equal (or even higher) CHA bonus as the belt, since the bonuses wouldn't stack. But right now? Entirely reasonable.

[Spiky]

Ah. Did not know that.

[veti]

There's no plausible way of denying, Elan did seem materially brighter when the party was split up.

My theory is that he's roleplaying. When the party's all together, they're a pretty formidable team, and they can afford to carry Elan as a full-time clown - pretty much as dead weight. But when they were split up, and particularly once Vaarsuvius started obviously losing it, he had no choice but to focus and grow up, just a little. (The same thing happened when he was locked up with Thog, who really does have preternaturally low INT and WIS scores.)

Seriously, I've seen people do the same in real life. As long as they can afford to - i.e. as long as they're surrounded by other people who'll let them get away with it - they'll act as if they don't have three brain cells to rub together. But when they have to, they can surprise everyone. Often it's beautiful people, as well, as they find it easiest to get others to "carry" them most of the time.

[Tiktakkat]

What if Elan is just dramatically clever?
Ampliying his Dashing Swordsman-ness, Elan demonstrates understanding, ranging from mere cunning to egregious punning to spontaneous deceit to deep emotional empathy when it is dramatically appropriate.
And when it is not, when it is rather dramatically absurd, he is his typical blithering fool self.
His ability scores are almost secondary to the dramatic requirements of the scene.

[veti]

What if Elan is just dramatically clever?
...
His ability scores are almost secondary to the dramatic requirements of the scene.

I think that's the same as my theory, except that we're looking at Elan's consciousness in different ways. You seem to be seeing him as a character who's driven by the author, for his own purposes. I'm looking at him as an autonomous character, whose player (or "super-ego", in in-universe terms) adjusts itself to changing circumstances.

[DaggerPen]

... please tell me that I'm not the only one who's having trouble telling if this is supposed to be a real or satirical thread.

[Linkavitch]

Here's what Elan has that several dwarfs don't. A functioning liver, depth perception, and a pulse.


My brother and I just laughed uproariously for about a minute and a half at this. You, sir, win all.

[Spiky]

... please tell me that I'm not the only one who's having trouble telling if this is supposed to be a real or satirical thread.

If you could define "real thread" in the context of this forum, I'd be happy to analyze this one and give an answer.

[DaggerPen]

If you could define "real thread" in the context of this forum, I'd be happy to analyze this one and give an answer.

"Real" meaning "serious," sorry. Mixed up "real theory" and "serious thread."

[whitelaughter]

What if Elan is just dramatically clever?

oooh - perhap Dashing Swordsman grants a bonuses to all drama, including dramatic planning?

[littlequietguy]

oooh - perhap Dashing Swordsman grants a bonuses to all drama, including dramatic planning?

That seems hard to say what is and what isn't fitting into this category.

[Cleverdan22]

I get that this is a mock conspiracy theory thread, but haven't the mods been locking basically all of these recently?

[Tiktakkat]

I think that's the same as my theory, except that we're looking at Elan's consciousness in different ways. You seem to be seeing him as a character who's driven by the author, for his own purposes. I'm looking at him as an autonomous character, whose player (or "super-ego", in in-universe terms) adjusts itself to changing circumstances.

As it happens, I am thinking of the eponymous character this nickname is taken from, who did rather similar things. He was an edeinos (a lizardman) in a TORG game, and was thus completely unsuited to be left on his own. Of course when things got really tight, he was able to unleash his own version of Unfrozen Caveman Laywer to secure a critical alliance.
Elan is the same way, stumbling about through life, and the quest, until things really are the worst they can be, and then dramatically demonstrating everything from Machiavellian cunning to an incredible emotional depth.
That such also possesses a meta-plot aspect that can serve the author so well should suggests not a break in-character, but rather the ability of the author to create such a deep character beneath the veneer of a "traditional" one-dimensional gaming cliche.

[multilis]

If he was betraying a good party of adventurers, wouldn't that make him evil? Since we have seen how his brain works when Nale betrayed him, we know that mommy would cry.
Lord Shojo... played dumb and worked behind back of his LG "party" for the "greater good".

Elan may see Snarl as CG or CN ally, closer to him in goals than LG Roy, and Banjo the Clown may see Snarl as help to eliminate deity competition.

[Herald Alberich]

There's no plausible way of denying, Elan did seem materially brighter when the party was split up.

My theory is that he's roleplaying. When the party's all together, they're a pretty formidable team, and they can afford to carry Elan as a full-time clown - pretty much as dead weight. But when they were split up, and particularly once Vaarsuvius started obviously losing it, he had no choice but to focus and grow up, just a little. (The same thing happened when he was locked up with Thog, who really does have preternaturally low INT and WIS scores.)

Seriously, I've seen people do the same in real life. As long as they can afford to - i.e. as long as they're surrounded by other people who'll let them get away with it - they'll act as if they don't have three brain cells to rub together. But when they have to, they can surprise everyone. Often it's beautiful people, as well, as they find it easiest to get others to "carry" them most of the time.

I didn't want to give this idea any credit, because it seemed like it meant Elan was deliberately not giving the quest to save the multiverse(!) his all, simply out of lazyness. But I rediscovered #558 (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0558.html) just now, and it makes a lot more sense: he used to slack off because he couldn't do anything meaningful anyway, and now he can, so he tries more. He's not perfect about it yet, though.

[krossbow]

obviously Elan is secretly working for lord tyrannar and is planning on delivering haley to him when she's most vulnerable.

[Thajocoth]

Well-said.

Though I'm honestly not sure if this thread is supposed to be serious...XD We should start a humourous crackpot theories thread, we haven't had one of those in a while. :smallbiggrin:

Nah, these are WAY funnier when half the posters take them seriously. :smallbiggrin: