I need change. Now.

[Xyk]

{Scrubbed}
I am also not begging for loose pocket change.

What I want is advice. I find my life to be increasingly stagnant and it's killing me. It's probably not that bad, but it's bugging me to a point of disbelief.

Here's a little background.

I am 16 years old. I have not made any sort of romantic contact with a female creature since February. I do not yet have my drivers license, though a vast majority of my friends do to go with their cars, (which I won't have even when I get my license in December). My daily routine is just that. Very routine. I get up at 5:30 to make early morning marching band rehearsal before school, get home at about 4:30 pm, where I sit here at my parent's computer doing nothing of interest because my own computer decided to die. I have no money and am forced to mooch off my friends for any luxuries I want.

These are the problems that refuse to go away.

I am the type of person that will generally go with the flow and let things resolve themselves, but I am feeling incredibly stale. Do any of you people know something I can do to remove that sticky feeling of staleness?

[Vmag]

Your reality is entirely a construct of your own will. That you admit to wanting to alter that reality is a good thing, but it's your own force of will that does it.

Dislodge yourself, by whatever means necessary. Simply put, this means DO something different. Feel the doldrums? Wake yourself up into proper awareness and do something else, regardless of how inclined you are to not.

[Thajocoth]

Your reality is entirely a construct of your own will. That you admit to wanting to alter that reality is a good thing, but it's your own force of will that does it.

Dislodge yourself, by whatever means necessary. Simply put, this means DO something different. Feel the doldrums? Wake yourself up into proper awareness and do something else, regardless of how inclined you are to not.

I will second this.

Wanna do something different? Think up a more specific goal and go take it.

[Roukon]

Your reality is entirely a construct of your own will. That you admit to wanting to alter that reality is a good thing, but it's your own force of will that does it.

Dislodge yourself, by whatever means necessary. Simply put, this means DO something different. Feel the doldrums? Wake yourself up into proper awareness and do something else, regardless of how inclined you are to not.

This is almost exactly what I would say. It will be harder due to your age, but I think if you can wait around for 2 years when you will be off to college to try to go to one outside easy travel distance from home, possibly out of state. However, if you do that, remember that out of state tuition is usually much more expensive than in state. If you choose to go out of state, then I would highly recommend to get some form of a scholarship, as financial aid will probably not be able to pay for all of your college costs. You really just need to get out of your current rut.

Roukon

[charl]

I hate to say this, but you are only sixteen! Your life will change soon as you go to college or enter the work market. It will be fine.

[evnafets]

Part of your issue right now seems to be a lack of financial freedom.
Here's one suggestion: get an after-school job! Even if its flipping burgers at the local McDonalds.
It sounds like you have at least some free time seeing as you are just sitting there "doing nothing of interest"

I see this as helping in two ways
1 - its a break from your regular routine. Work experience is always good.
2 - it'll get you some extra cash/pocket money so you don't have to mooch off your friends so much.

[Roukon]

Part of your issue right now seems to be a lack of financial freedom.
Here's one suggestion: get an after-school job! Even if its flipping burgers at the local McDonalds.
It sounds like you have at least some free time seeing as you are just sitting there "doing nothing of interest"

I see this as helping in two ways
1 - its a break from your regular routine. Work experience is always good.
2 - it'll get you some extra cash/pocket money so you don't have to mooch off your friends so much.

This is another good idea. However, make sure your schoolwork comes first. While I don't like telling others what to do, if you find your grades slipping, do what it takes (including quitting a job, if you have one) to get them back up to a good level.

[Player_Zero]

Oh no. Sixteen and don't have a girlfriend? That's worse than a terminal disease!

[Mando Knight]

I am 16 years old. I have not made any sort of romantic contact with a female creature since February. I do not yet have my drivers license, though a vast majority of my friends do to go with their cars, (which I won't have even when I get my license in December). My daily routine is just that. Very routine. I get up at 5:30 to make early morning marching band rehearsal before school, get home at about 4:30 pm, where I sit here at my parent's computer doing nothing of interest because my own computer decided to die. I have no money and am forced to mooch off my friends for any luxuries I want.

...And? Any ambitions? Any wants? Any needs? If not, then any change you make will be half-hearted, meaningless, and unsatisfactory. Continue onward in your present, apparently stable, course until you find a reason to change. Change for its own sake is not necessarily good.

[MethosH]

I am 16 years old.

There you go! That is your problem!! Oh... Wait.. you want advice...



I have not made any sort of romantic contact with a female creature since February.

Hey! Some people haven't made any sort of romantic contact with a female for years now!! Yeah! True story! Ok... But hey... I now you have your hormones all over your skin, but you don't need to get laid just cuz you are available. Things happen. If you have a crush on somebody, go for it. If not, wait until somebody calls your attention and go for it!



I do not yet have my drivers license, though a vast majority of my friends do to go with their cars, (which I won't have even when I get my license in December).

I'm 20 and I still don't have a license. And boy, you sound a lot more depressing than I do. So I don't think not having a license is a real problem. Maybe the problem is that your friends have and you don't!



My daily routine is just that. Very routine. I get up at 5:30 to make early morning marching band rehearsal before school, get home at about 4:30 pm, where I sit here at my parent's computer doing nothing of interest because my own computer decided to die.

:smalleek:
This is just me... But usually early morning things don't make me happy. Cuz it is early morning. And.... Marching band?! :smallbiggrin:


I have no money and am forced to mooch off my friends for any luxuries I want.

You greedy bastard! LOL
No, seriously... Many good things in life are just free. Try to show your friends that.


These are the problems that refuse to go away.

They refuse to go away BECAUSE you are 16!!! You don't have a good paying job... You are not in college... and you are in a freaking marching band! Stop bitching about it and enjoy your freaking laziness while you can! Or just find something else to do! Go fix your computer!



I am the type of person that will generally go with the flow and let things resolve themselves, but I am feeling incredibly stale. Do any of you people know something I can do to remove that sticky feeling of staleness?

Chocolate or just go do something with your spare time so you don't think about the inevitable ending of the universe that will make your life meaningless unless humanity find a way to survive that. :smallbiggrin:

EDIT:


Oh no. Sixteen and don't have a girlfriend? That's worse than a terminal disease!

Nice... Nice...

[Player_Zero]

They refuse to go away BECAUSE you are 16!!!


Second. Only, without the three exclamation marks.

[MethosH]

By the way... Don't get a job yet just because of the money! You are too young!
I think it is stupid get a job as pizza guy when you have the conditions to study more and end up with a even better job later in your life.

[Innis Cabal]

You don't have a problem. Your 16 years old. You really don't have that much to worry about. You don't have rent. You don't have bills. You should just relax, and be glad for the tedium that you've got going. Sure it may cause you problems. But frankly, you'll be wishing for it when you get out into the real world. You'll be begging for it.

Relax. Your 16. Stop worrying. Thats the reason your having problems.

[Lupy]

Go for a walk in your area instead of internetting. Go to a coffee shop. Talk to strangers. Meet some new friends. BAM! Stuff to do.

[Xyk]

Yeah I know, 16 is young, things will happen later and feeling really restless is not the worst thing in the world. I also have a chronic ulcerative colitis if that will satisfy you, but that flare-up is pretty much over. Small problems need dealing with too.

An after-school job is an idea. I referee soccer on the weekends, but I don't have time to do that much due to various marching band competitions and whatnot. Almost all of the money from that is going towards a new computer because mine is really unsalvageable (motherboard problems would cost too much to be worth fixing).

What I really want right now is ideas of how to make changes fast. Change for the sake of change is what I'm after.

[MethosH]

Relax. Your 16. Stop worrying. Thats the reason your having problems.

Yeah! You think too much! If you MUST think stop being existentialist and become creative and productive during your advanced stage of lethargy.

EDIT:
Change for the sake of change? Buy a cat and try to shave him.

EDIT 2:

I'm NOT joking...

[tribble]

This (http://www.freewebs.com/crimean/tzeentch.jpg) is your answer.
Or, the answer could be forming a chapter of this (http://animeted.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/sos-brigade-big.png) organization in your local high school.

[Recaiden]

This (http://www.freewebs.com/crimean/tzeentch.jpg) is your answer.
Or, the answer could be forming a chapter of this (http://animeted.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/sos-brigade-big.png) organization in your local high school.

The first idea is terrible, but the second may have some merit.:smallbiggrin: That said, trying to get a job sounds like a good idea for you.

[Ashtar]

Ok. You want change?

Tomorrow, you will do something completely out of character and put yourself out of your life's comfort zone. Go somewhere you've never been. Is there a modern art gallery or museum you've never even heard of before in your area? A coffee shop inhabited by a strange category of humans you've never interacted with? Find out and go there, tomorrow.

Also, talk with someone you've never met before. Not just to say hi, but engage in conversation. We never meet people unless we move out of our comfort bubble.

And report back.

[MethosH]

You should also try to quit the marching band... Or maybe that is just between me and marching bands :smallmad:

[The Extinguisher]

Stop wearing shoes.

Run away and become a philosophy major.

In the middle of lunch time, sit down at a table full of people you don't know and just start talking to them.

Everyday after school pick a random street and avenue in your city and just hang out there.

Burn all your clothes and buy new ones. In that order.

[MethosH]

Burn all your clothes and buy new ones. In that order.

The fact that this idea came from a guy named "The Extinguisher" makes it sounds even cooler

[Jalor]

You should also try to quit the marching band... Or maybe that is just between me and marching bands :smallmad:
It's just you. Marching band is awesome. Stick with marching band; you'll regret it if you quit.

Make it a goal to do something you wouldn't normally do every day.

[The Extinguisher]

The fact that this idea came from a guy named "The Extinguisher" makes it sounds even cooler

Indeed it does. Indeed it does. :smallwink:

[thubby]

get a job?
solves the stagnation and funding problem.

or take up a hobby.

[xPANCAKEx]

get a job

and take up jogging

[Raewyn]

Do you have a bike? Depending on where you live, that might give you more mobility then you'd have on foot. Also, all but the best bikes are cheaper than a car.

I also [n+1]th the job recommendation - it seems like it would solve both your money and boredom issues rather handily.

[Xyk]

I think I may get a part-time job if I can. Thanks for giving me ideas. I especially like those of The Extinguisher and Ashtar. I think I may try to overcome my shyness simultaneously.

Thank you, kind strangers.

[RandomNPC]

On the job thing, when i got a job i recruited 90% of the people i've ever played D&D with from my pool of co-workers. seriously, only 4 people i've gamed with haven't worked with me.

I personally second the get out there, pick someone at random, walk up, and say "hello, my name is *, how are you today?"

I however can not stand behind the idea of doing something you wouldn't normally do idea, because if i were to follow that advice everyone i've ever met would be uncomfortable with the idea of me. to give you an idea, i think it's perfectly reasonable when you're trying to get someone to laugh to lean up really close to them so you're face to face and with a serious look tell them something very personal about yourself that they have no safe way of confirming or denying. at the very least you get that uncomfortable chuckle.

geographicly if you're near me i've got a bunch of things you can do that don't involve spending money, and i could use the company.

edit: also i generally respect personal space, the odd fact thing i usually do when someone claims to know my sense of humor well enough that i'm not funny anymore.

[Thatguyoverther]

I recommend getting a job as well, even if it's a crappy paper route. Mostly because having a job facilitates having a car.

You don't really have friends until you own a car. Or at least that was my experience.

Having a car also facilitates the whole romance thing. Going on dates is a much simpler prospect when you can drive yourself.

[Tiger Duck]

You don't really have friends until you own a car.

That sounds horribly wrong. I really hope that's not true as I'm not planning to ever own a car.:smallconfused:

[Thatguyoverther]

The accuracy of the statement depends a lot on where you live. If public transportation is an option or you're within schlepping distance a car probably isn't that important.

On the other hand, if you, like me, grew up in a rural area access to transportation is a social necessity.



Also, if you're going to surf the internet try doing it at the local library instead of at home. It'll get you out of the house, and there's a good chance of meeting people in your age range.

[Totally Guy]

Accidentally organise a naked day with your circle of friends.

so far that's the highlight of this year for me.

[Stormthorn]

Oh no. Sixteen and don't have a girlfriend? That's worse than a terminal disease!

Dont mock him.


That sounds horribly wrong. I really hope that's not true as I'm not planning to ever own a car.

Its not really true. Having a car only increased my number of good friends from 2 to 3.

[Xyk]

Accidentally organise a naked day with your circle of friends.

so far that's the highlight of this year for me.

That's generally frowned upon here in the States, especially in Texas.

I would really really like a car, but my family does not have the money right now. It is unfortunate but understandable. I think if I could save up with a part-time job, but it would still take many moons. A used car that runs reliably costs about $3-5 thousand, and the likely minimum wage of $5ish an hour at maybe 15 hours per week to keep up with schoolwork at the same time comes out to about $75 per week. 10 months for a $3000 vehicle. Perhaps a motorcycle would be better...:smalltongue:

[charl]

That's generally frowned upon here in the States, especially in Texas.

Frack that. If your friends are into it why care what society thinks?

[Rutskarn]

As far as the routine thing goes: this may or may not help, but try art. Whenever I feel like I'm getting into a rut (oh-ho, puntastic), I do some writing or drawing and it puts a fresh coat of paint on things.

As far as the romantic thing goes: relax, mate, it's lunacy to worry about relationships at that age. I'm 18, I've never been in one, and I'm happy as a goddamned clam.

[KnightDisciple]

That's generally frowned upon here in the States, especially in Texas.

I would really really like a car, but my family does not have the money right now. It is unfortunate but understandable. I think if I could save up with a part-time job, but it would still take many moons. A used car that runs reliably costs about $3-5 thousand, and the likely minimum wage of $5ish an hour at maybe 15 hours per week to keep up with schoolwork at the same time comes out to about $75 per week. 10 months for a $3000 vehicle. Perhaps a motorcycle would be better...:smalltongue:

Um, I'm pretty sure minimum wage here in the States is 7.25 an hour.

[Xyk]

Um, I'm pretty sure minimum wage here in the States is 7.25 an hour.

And after a quick googling, you would be right. That means about $108 per week and $3000 would be achieved at about 7 months. I wish I wasn't so impatient.


Stuff about art.

I'm a musician by trade, and I have been slacking on my composing lately due to my broken computer and hatred of hand-writing notes. Maybe some sort of catharsis will come.

@V: thank you.

[Rutskarn]

I'm a musician by trade, and I have been slacking on my composing lately due to my broken computer and hatred of hand-writing notes. Maybe some sort of <insert word that sounds a little like Carthage I think that is like an emotional release> will come.

Catharsis. Word you're looking for is catharsis.

[Stormthorn]

Um, I'm pretty sure minimum wage here in the States is 7.25 an hour.

Doesnt have to be. Some states set a different minimum wage. It costs more to live in California for instance so ours is more like 8.15 an hour. Which is cool but has its downsides. Mainly the high cost of living.

[KnightDisciple]

Doesnt have to be. Some states set a different minimum wage. It costs more to live in California for instance so ours is more like 8.15 an hour. Which is cool but has its downsides. Mainly the high cost of living.

Well, it is at least 7.25.

@Xyk: Fact of the matter is, that's going to be life. Unless you luck out somehow, you'll just have to work and save. I hate to be a spoilsport, but welcome to the rest of your life.:smallwink:

The key is in planning, and being able to motivate yourself to work towards a goal like that.

[Thrawn183]

Marching Band? Ugh. If you really like it, cool.... but ugh.

There are a bunch of things that I can think of.

- See if your parents will buy you a membership to a gym. Being diesel is awesome.
- Learn to scuba dive.
- Join a book club.
- Go hiking (there are usually hiking clubs as well, nice to meet people)
- Go to a concert.
- Make peace with an old enemy. See if you can turn them into a friend.
- Help out a friend. Everyone has problems, which means you know someone who could use your help.
- Volunteer in the community.
- Get an internship for your local congresperson.
- Learn a new language. I mean find people who are fluent, become friends with them and spend significant amounts of time where you speak to them in only that language. Don't know anyone who speaks that language? Find them and become friends.
- Find a running buddy you can run with on a regular basis.
- I would say to learn a new musical instrument, but marching band... urgh.
- Learn to fix cars. No seriously, this will be useful for the rest of your life!
- Start shopping at your local thrift stores, you never know what crazy awesome stuff you can find for cheap.
- Enroll in some lessons from your local NRA.
- Learn to play a new sport.
- Do something nice for both of your parents.
- Play a joke on both of your parents (in good taste, please).

[Thatguyoverther]

That's generally frowned upon here in the States, especially in Texas.

I would really really like a car, but my family does not have the money right now. It is unfortunate but understandable. I think if I could save up with a part-time job, but it would still take many moons. A used car that runs reliably costs about $3-5 thousand, and the likely minimum wage of $5ish an hour at maybe 15 hours per week to keep up with schoolwork at the same time comes out to about $75 per week. 10 months for a $3000 vehicle. Perhaps a motorcycle would be better...:smalltongue:

A motorcycle probably isn't a great idea. I don't know about where you live, but here you have to be 18 before you get a licenses.

You can probably find a semi-reliable car for about 500, if you look hard enough. If there's a car auction anywhere near you, you should scope it out.

[The Extinguisher]

I think I may get a part-time job if I can. Thanks for giving me ideas. I especially like those of The Extinguisher and Ashtar. I think I may try to overcome my shyness simultaneously.

Thank you, kind strangers.

Now I just need to follow my own advice and life will be set :smallbiggrin:

[Renegade Paladin]

That's generally frowned upon here in the States, especially in Texas.

I would really really like a car, but my family does not have the money right now. It is unfortunate but understandable. I think if I could save up with a part-time job, but it would still take many moons. A used car that runs reliably costs about $3-5 thousand, and the likely minimum wage of $5ish an hour at maybe 15 hours per week to keep up with schoolwork at the same time comes out to about $75 per week. 10 months for a $3000 vehicle. Perhaps a motorcycle would be better...:smalltongue:
Dude, the federal minimum wage is $7.25 an hour.