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BenTheJester
2009-10-14, 03:20 PM
Because "Roll Intimidate check" is just too boring, I like to spice up my intimidate checks by saying, well, intimidating things.

an example would be:


[...]
"Unfortunately, my true position has been discovered and this man here was sent to assassinate me. I have dealt with him, and now I was planning on interrogating the bastard, to gain as much information as I can."

"Now, I strongly suggest you let me at it, that is, if you still want a job tomorrow."


One failed bluff check later:


Varan grabs both men by the collar and stomps them on the wall behind him

His tone changes to a much more threatening one: "Just forget what I just said. If you guys wanna LIVE tomorrow, you better let me at it.

"This guy right here had 4 more buddies protecting him. I'm letting you guess where they are now."

After showing a dark smile:
"My guess would be: drowning in a pool of their own blood."




What are good ones you used, or think about using.

AmberVael
2009-10-14, 03:25 PM
Not a good one I used, but a good example which is always worth citing for these kinds of things.
This and the page after it. (http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20060306)

Croverus
2009-10-14, 03:30 PM
A vampire character I made who used intimidate... I only rolled like 3 successes but my Story Teller added points ofr roleplaying when I said in character: "I'll torture you so slowly you'll think I'm getting payed by the hour."

The person I was torturing was a business man and it had been previously revealed tha my character worked for minimum wage for the guy's company when my character had been mortal. So yeah...

Paulus
2009-10-14, 07:10 PM
Depends on the situation but one of my favorite has always been:

"Hello, My name is <your name here> you killed my <loved one>, prepare to die."

industrious
2009-10-14, 07:22 PM
From a game I'm still in.


Blitzkranz smiles, and sketches a bow. “Thank you, sir.” If one couldn’t see his eyes, one would assume he was accepting a dance. The eyes, though, the black and featureless eyes reveal the pleasure of a man about to do something he enjoys so very, very much.

Kneeling down to the level of the steward, Blitzkranz turns his head back towards the clerics. “He’s unconscious.” He then pauses, tilts his head to the left, and shakes the man awake.

"Now, steward," he remarks, slowly, deliberately, drawing each word out. "do you know how I got this scar on my cheek? The village priest in the hamlet of Cryerie was a very smart man. He knew what I was the instant I walked into the square. So he took up his holy symbol, and pressed it slowly, softly, gently into my flesh. It burned, my dear steward, it burned like the sun depicted. I will always carry this scar; everywhere I go it stays with me."

"My associates, they are good people. Righteous people of the cloth and sword and path. Me? I am a warlock. You know from what source my power lies, the pacts and deals that must be made for this power. Now, you are going to tell me everything you know about the ritual. You are going to tell me what exactly the spell you used against the monk was. You are going to tell me how many guards there are here currently. And, you are going to tell me about this wonderful dagger I found. Or, I will slice your flesh until you do, and tonight I will feed once more on human flesh. I leave the choice entirely up to you."


I actually took 10 on the check, so DC 15.

The_Werebear
2009-10-14, 07:27 PM
Spoilered for Graphic Content. -- From someone very thorough with ranks in heal.

"You want to know something interesting? Each finger has three breakable bones in it. Each toe has another two. That's fifty breakable points. Then, factor in your nose and testicles. There's another three. That gives me a total of fifty three points that I can cause excruciating pain in with this hammer. Now, I'm going to ask you a question for one minute. If you refuse to answer me, I will break one of these bones with this hammer. It will only take a few seconds to do so. I will then ask again for one minute. Then I will break another one. If you manage to resist the entire time, with me smashing every single one of these points with a hammer, congratulations. You've done something no other man has ever done. You'll have earned one hour of reprieve, and then I come back with garden shears and we repeat the process on hard mode.

The next three hours of your life can be the most miserable, or you can tell me what I want right now and be sent back to your cell where no one will touch you. The first minute begins now."

Pharaoh's Fist
2009-10-14, 07:27 PM
"Won't insult legendary underworld solidarity by suggesting you surrender name without torture". - Rorschach

Steward
2009-10-14, 07:31 PM
industrious, I take that entire thing as a personal threat. :smallbiggrin:

Forevernade
2009-10-14, 07:35 PM
"Hello, My name is <your name here> you killed my <loved one>, prepare to die."

That doesnt sound very intimidating... if he killed your loved one, he wouldn't mind killing you...

Sometimes cinematic effects are enough, like last night we were beating the crap out of some beefy dockland mugger, and I pelted him straight in the nose. All that was needed was for him to start bleeding into his teeth, and as he turns to us he gives us a great big bloody grin and a mean chuckle as if the pain was naught. There is nothing more frightening in a fight than putting your 'all' into a blow, and the big guy just laughing at you.

Other cinematic effects can be harnessed by the character's class - a barbarians roar, the wizard's illusionary effects (overwhelming darkness background, glowing eyes and convulsing bodyparts as energy crackles through his body - if someone thinks a magic-user is about to explode EVERYone is going to run screaming).

A good line for druids is analogising nature(this druid was a poetic one): "You face the wrath of nature eye to eye, but your flesh is WEAK and last breath NIGH! You DARE to cross the path of that which makes THE FLESH you're of, can easily UNCREATE! Scatter, foul wealkings, before Nature decides to reclaim her self."

Green Bean
2009-10-14, 07:38 PM
"Tell me, do you like ginger beer?"

Tyndmyr
2009-10-14, 07:39 PM
I prefer "Time Stop".

Lycan 01
2009-10-14, 07:40 PM
I've never gotten to intimidate anyone. :smallfrown:

And oddly enough, my players never try it... :smallconfused:

Although...


The first DnD game I ever ran, the players tried to intimidate an old man who ran the store they were in. Well, the player rolled a 20... so I said he acted so menacing that he gave the old merchant a heart attack. He drops dead, right there.

I forgot what happened next. All I remember is a guard giving the old man CPR, the guy who intimdated him claiming he was a healer and speaking gibberish so the other player could sneak out, and the old man waking up during said gibberish and panicking, only to be knocked out by the "ritual" he was performing. IIRC... It was over a year and a half ago. :smalltongue:

tyckspoon
2009-10-14, 07:44 PM
That doesnt sound very intimidating... if he killed your loved one, he wouldn't mind killing you...


Well, no, it's not. The first time. You get a stacking circumstance bonus for every time you use it on the same target. :smallwink:

An Enemy Spy
2009-10-14, 07:47 PM
That doesnt sound very intimidating... if he killed your loved one, he wouldn't mind killing you...

I think you missed the point of the quote.

Revanmal
2009-10-14, 07:56 PM
"Listen to me very carefully, dear friend. You know what I am, yes? Yes, I am a 'bug person.' But to be more specific, I am Thri-Kreen. Your people and mine are very different, elf. You live in your forest cities, in the lap of luxury, while me and my clutch scratch out a living in the arid wastes. You live many, slothful centuries here in your cushy homes, while we fight for our lives among the rocks for just a few decades. You willingly fall unconcious for hours, while we can fight for days without rest."

It is here I invade his personal space.

"Do you know what this means, elf? It means we are made strong. And you... you are weak. And the hunt says the strong shall prey on the weak. You are little more than an animal to me, squishy elf. You are meat."

Here, I start to look hungry.

"I can smell it, elf. I smell your fear. Ahh, you cannot know this temptation... It is the sweetest scent, your terror. Sweeter than any other biped. I am not ashamed to say this; I want your flesh. I want to rip you apart and devour every scrap, little morsel. I want to devour you, and bring the jerky back to the clutch. But I will give you a chance. What has transpired here never happened. You saw nothing of this, do you understand? Good. Because if you tell... I will find you, squishy little elf, and I will make you my prey."

The elf was then untied and let free, his pants thoroughly soiled and the addition of a Suggestion made sure he REALLY didn't want to mention what happened.

Curmudgeon
2009-10-14, 09:02 PM
You need the proper setup for this one. It helps if your enemy has just cast Time Stop and spammed Cloudkill and multiple Delayed Blast Fireballs, followed by a Quickened Horrid Wilting.

"Didn't hurt."

Evasion + Mettle + Breath of the Waves graft.

Mr. Mud
2009-10-14, 09:06 PM
"Sneak Attack". :smalltongue:.

industrious
2009-10-14, 09:08 PM
"I've just destroyed your spellbook."

Why don't more people do this in a campaign? One of the best ways to stop a wizard is to stop him from regaining spells over time.

Siosilvar
2009-10-14, 09:12 PM
Well, no, it's not. The first time. You get a stacking circumstance bonus for every time you use it on the same target. :smallwink:

"STOP SAYING THAT!"

Arakune
2009-10-14, 09:14 PM
You need the proper setup for this one. It helps if your enemy has just cast Time Stop and spammed Cloudkill and multiple Delayed Blast Fireballs, followed by a Quickened Horrid Wilting.

"Didn't hurt."

Evasion + Mettle + Breath of the Waves graft.

I prefer a simple And?

Serenity
2009-10-14, 10:04 PM
A good, if somewhat overblown one I had for a druid:

"Perhaps you've heard of wise men in the woods, peddling herbal remedies and turning people who annoy them into frogs for a few hours. I'm not that sort of druid. I'm the sort who has my pet ape rip out the throat of anyone who gets in my way."

John Campbell
2009-10-14, 10:40 PM
We'd captured this thug who had been hired by someone to attack us, and were trying to interrogate her to figure out who. The Knight and the Paladin were doing a completely ineffectual job of it, so, as the social-oriented Rogue, I finally shooed them out of the room so I could work.

After closing the door behind them, I turned back to our prisoner, pulled one of the plain old steel daggers I kept secreted about my person, and said to her, "Now that they're gone, we'll get down to business. You have two choices: You can answer every question I ask, fully and truthfully, and volunteer any information you think I might want to know but haven't thought to ask about, and when we're done, I'll cut your throat with this dagger, and you'll die and proceed to whatever afterlife is in store for you... probably the Hells or the Abyss, but, hey, maybe you'll get lucky and someone cares enough to raise you.

"Or, you can continue to withhold information, and I'll kill you with this dagger..." and at this point, I produced another dagger in my other hand, one with an inky black blade like a sliver of pure darkness, "and consume your soul like I did your friends', and you'll be utterly destroyed forever, beyond the power of even the gods to recover you. Now, which will it be?"

She spilled her guts.

I wasn't bluffing, either.

Rixx
2009-10-14, 11:29 PM
"Oh, hi, everyone. My name's Terrance Walker. You might also know me as 'the guy who just knocked that guy out with one punch'. I just wanted to let you all know that I'm currently accepting challenges."

chiasaur11
2009-10-14, 11:31 PM
"I'm the good cop."

Moglorosh
2009-10-14, 11:44 PM
This will always be my favorite (http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2006/4/10/)

ondonaflash
2009-10-14, 11:54 PM
See, you are bothering me very much, because the intimidations you use are all the sorts of things vicious men say to people.

What you need to use is the sorts of things nice men say to people.

"You don't know? There's nothing you can say that can help me?" *sigh* *draws knife* "I honestly, and truly wish you could have come up with something"

A lot of it is about reluctance, and leaving the details to the imagination. The less you say, the scarier everything gets.

Make it seem like what you are going to do is actually causing you discomfort, and they'll start gibbering like mad!

The other part of intimidating is follow through. Do what you say you will.

I started getting creative in a Savage Worlds campaign, we were trying to rescue hostages from slavers, and this is what I came up with

[Mon May 18 22:44:18 2009] : (5) Gabriel: Gabriel sighs and crouches down.
[Mon May 18 22:44:32 2009] : (5) Gabriel: "I don't like killing, its not something I enjoy."
[Mon May 18 22:44:59 2009] : (5) Gabriel: "And the idea of killing someone who is helpless, unarmed, and afraid, really leaves a bad taste in my mouth."
[Mon May 18 22:45:22 2009] : (1) GM: "Le-le-let me go."
[Mon May 18 22:46:03 2009] : (1) GM: ok, hold up, Nick cut out
[Mon May 18 22:47:16 2009] : (6) Gabriel (enter): 22:47
[Mon May 18 22:47:53 2009] : (6) Gabriel: Gabriel rests his blade on the bandits neck, and stares him straight in the eye. "So why don't you make this easy for me and tell me everything I want to know."
[Mon May 18 22:48:44 2009] : (1) GM: Booting '(5) Gabriel' from room...
[Mon May 18 22:48:45 2009] : (5) Gabriel (exit): 22:48
[Mon May 18 22:48:57 2009] : (1) GM: "L-l-let me go. I don't know anything!"
[Mon May 18 22:49:19 2009] : (6) Gabriel: I punch him.
[Mon May 18 22:49:29 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "What where you doing in that tower!"
[Mon May 18 22:49:36 2009] : (6) Gabriel: *were
[Mon May 18 22:49:47 2009] : (1) GM: He cries out in pain.
[Mon May 18 22:50:15 2009] : (1) GM: "Agk! Nothin' I wasn't doin' nothin'! You came up an' killed me mate!"
[Mon May 18 22:51:10 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "That's not a very good answer. You're going to have to do better than that if you want to walk away from this!"
[Mon May 18 22:51:52 2009] : (1) GM: "
[Mon May 18 22:52:21 2009] : (1) GM: "Lemme go, I don't know nothin'."
[Mon May 18 22:52:26 2009] : (1) GM: He looks at you for a moment
[Mon May 18 22:52:48 2009] : (1) GM: He decides to change course.
[Mon May 18 22:52:57 2009] : (1) GM: "W-what do you wanna know?"
[Mon May 18 22:53:41 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Well, lets start with why there's a tower out here in the mountains. I heard places like this could be... dangerous." I glare at him.
[Mon May 18 22:54:04 2009] : (6) Gabriel: Running my fingers down the blade of My Brother's Sword.
[Mon May 18 22:54:37 2009] : (1) GM: "It's a... guard tower."
[Mon May 18 22:55:03 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Really? Now that's interesting. What up here is worth guarding?"
[Mon May 18 22:56:51 2009] : (1) GM: "It's, uh, a little town up there on top of the mountain, see?"
[Mon May 18 22:57:59 2009] : (6) Gabriel: I get on my knee, to meet him eye to eye. "Now, now. We both know that's not the full story."
[Mon May 18 22:58:12 2009] : (6) Gabriel: I even pat his cheek condescendingly.
[Mon May 18 22:58:29 2009] : (6) Gabriel: Letting my hand linger, and maybe clench a little on the last pat.
[Mon May 18 23:01:01 2009] : (1) GM: "It's a tiny little town, I live there! It's ruled by a man named Jarl, we was keepin' watch for monsters!"
[Mon May 18 23:01:52 2009] : (6) Gabriel: Gabriel smiles warmly. "What's your name?"
[Mon May 18 23:02:32 2009] : (6) Gabriel: (his name is largely inconsequential.)
[Mon May 18 23:03:08 2009] : (1) GM: "Jim."
[Mon May 18 23:03:54 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Well Jim" Gabriel says kindly "If you don't start being honest with me..."
[Mon May 18 23:04:26 2009] : (1) GM: "Why do you want to go up there, anyways!?"
[Mon May 18 23:04:30 2009] : (6) Gabriel: He changes to sudden fury, driving the sword into the ground between Jim's legs "I'M GONNA CUT YOU IN TWO!"
[Mon May 18 23:04:53 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "I ask the questions here Jim! ME!"
[Mon May 18 23:05:57 2009] : (1) GM: He screams.
[Mon May 18 23:06:13 2009] : (6) Gabriel: I gently run the blade along his cheek. "Now Jim... tell me a bit more about this village of yours. How many friends live with Jarl?"
[Mon May 18 23:06:35 2009] : (6) Gabriel: (This is fun!)
[Mon May 18 23:06:47 2009] : (1) GM: "Uh..." He counts on his fingers. "Seventeen. Er, sixteen now."
[Mon May 18 23:07:39 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Sixteen... Good. Good, Jim, we're telling the truth now, and we're happy. Everybody's happy."
[Mon May 18 23:08:12 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Only a few more questions and you can be on your way. Not back to the village, you understand, but wherever you care to go after that."
[Mon May 18 23:08:29 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "When is your relief coming?"
[Mon May 18 23:09:04 2009] : (1) GM: "Relief? What do you mean? Oh, more boys. Not until morning."
[Mon May 18 23:09:59 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Alright and the last one... Do you have any people in your 'village' who might not be happy to be their? Might be... a little upset at their current state? And if so, where would I find those people?"
[Mon May 18 23:11:52 2009] : (1) GM: "Well, um..."
[Mon May 18 23:11:52 2009] : (1) GM: "Jarl'll have my 'ead if I say anything like that."
[Mon May 18 23:12:23 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Jim... Jim, Jim, Jim. I can promise you. PROMISE you. Jarl will never be your concern again."
[Mon May 18 23:13:03 2009] : (1) GM: "R-really?"
[Mon May 18 23:13:17 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "Absolutely"
[Mon May 18 23:13:42 2009] : (1) GM: "You... you promise?"
[Mon May 18 23:13:53 2009] : (6) Gabriel: "On My Brother's Sword"

There was a little more after that, I made him take off his clothes, and run naked through the woods back to town.

ShneekeyTheLost
2009-10-15, 12:02 AM
*brings a hand up to the cut he just received, and looks at the now bloodied hand. He grins and chuckles, an expression and noise completely devoid of sanity. He licks the blood from his hand, then looks back at his opponent*

"Ahh, the sweet, blissful caress of pain. Too long has it been since someone has been able to mark me so. It seems you are worthy. Come, then, let us revel in the throes of agony. I promise, I won't disappoint." *maniacal laughter that even the Joker would be envious of*

ondonaflash
2009-10-15, 12:03 AM
"Ah'm gunna make you mah wuman!"

Kylarra
2009-10-15, 12:04 AM
"I've just destroyed your spellbook."

Why don't more people do this in a campaign? One of the best ways to stop a wizard is to stop him from regaining spells over time.Because playing a commoner is boring.

ShneekeyTheLost
2009-10-15, 12:09 AM
Because playing a commoner is boring.

And it is destroying an enormous amount of your income. Even a basic 1st level Wizard's spellbook is worth, what, 3k? 5? Something like that. A 10th level Wizard's spellbook is easily worth more than some dragon hordes. Do you *REALLY* want to piss that much money away?


"Ah'm gunna make you mah wuman!"Or, if you are the 'bad cop'...

"Do you know what's gonna happen now? You're going to prison. Not just any prison, we've got a special one all whipped up. Your cellmate's name will be Bubba. He's doing live without parole for Rape and Murder. He hasn't seen a woman in almost ten years. And you're just his type. Even has the pretty blonde hair. Oh yes, I do think you two will get along juuuust fine.

Or, do you wish to cooperate with this investigation, and we'll sort of forget about this? Me? I don't care. I have other sources I can try. But Bubba's been getting real lonely lately..."

Dienekes
2009-10-15, 12:28 AM
Me: Alright, I'll guard the prisoner. Telrin, Mors you two take watch.
*good characters exit, leaving only me and true neutral wizard*
Me: I sit down next to him, a half interested look on my face. "What's your name, drow?"
GM: Lolth claim you, you filthy human.
Me: I take out my dagger and start dragging it across his face. "Now, now, that isn't nice at all, friend. I'll ask again, before I start to cut and ruin some of your good looks. Besides what good is a name?"
GM: "Xenthur," he spits out angrily. Trying his best not to look disturbed at the knife.
Me: "See? That wasn't hard at all was it?" I take the knife off his face. "So what do you think of my compatriots? The two who just left?"
GM: The drow's eyes darkened. "They are cur, no lower. They're idiotic ideals and morality are a weakness that your kind suffers. You will be cast aside to-"
Me: "That's quite enough Xenthur. And as a matter of fact, I agree with you. They're morals are worthless, which is why I don't bother with them." I smile at him. "You see there are two types of people in the world Xenthur, those that posture and bloat their self worth, and those that get things done. I am of the latter breed. So here is what we're about to do. I'll start asking question and you'll answer."
GM: "Never, I will never debase myself to the empty threats of-"
Me: I cut off his ear.
GM: Ok... he screams. And then he glares at you, breathing heavily.
Me: "You will let me finish, Xenthur." I wipe the blood off my knife on his cheek. "You see, I learned something through my travels with the fools who just left. Even the most hardened of people have that one, that person, or that thing that they treasure more than anything else. You see that mage over there? You can answer now Xenthur."
GM: "Yes"
Me: "He also gets things done. He will find what you treasure most, and then he will send me to them, and I will destroy them. Not like I'll kill you, mind, I'll destroy them. They're bones will be twisted, their limbs severed, the blood slowly drained from their bodies. I'm sure you get the idea. Now, you're going to answer my questions, perfectly."
Allion (the wizard): Hey, man. That doesn't seem
Me: Roll with it.
Allion: Ugh, fine. But I'm not losing my alignment because of you.
GM: Xenthur's in tears now. "Why? Why are you doing this to me?"
Me: "Because I can." I start to tap the blade on his arm. "Shall we begin?"

Wooter
2009-10-15, 12:46 AM
Why you need look no further than the lyrics to heavy metal songs! This one's from Five Finger Death Punch. It's not very... sophisticated, but it works for a thuggish character.

"You wanna disrespect me, you little ****ing punk? Everything I've done?, And who I am? As far as I've ****ing come? I'll slap you so ****ing hard, It'll feel like you kissed a freight train."

I suppose it would only work in an Ebberon campaign...

Shademan
2009-10-15, 02:48 AM
in a campaign I dm'ed the...in lack of a better word: Paladin, who was also a machoist, never got to torture anyone but he had a plan.
he would start cutting himself and smile brightly at the vistim, probably saying something like "don't worry. when I'm done with myself, I'll get to you..."
ah, he had so many ideas for getting information outta people...

Sir Homeslice
2009-10-15, 03:24 AM
Not by me, but the character I'm quoting said all of that before rolling his Intimidate, which, for the better, turned out to be a natural 20.


"Little man, do you know how old I am? I am a hundred and five years old. In Human terms, I would be roughly twenty, not much older than you in fact. However, I will live for two hundred more years, maybe more. If you do not tell me what I want to know, I will horrifically torture you, and you will wish I resort of physical means. May magic will break you in ways you only dream of in the darkest corners of your mind. After that, I will find a way to cure you, and do it all over again until I grow bored."

"After you die a broken husk of a man, I will find each and every member of your family and wait until they are happiest, I will ingrain myself in their lives such as they will trust me as if I were family. At the peak of their happiness, I will spirit them away and do to them what I have done to you, tenfold."

... Or he said something like that. It basically boiled down to "Help us or I'm going to utilize my freakishly inhumanly long lifespan and devote a portion of it to unnessecarily and pointlessly draw out your death and do the same to everyone you love."

I just posted it because quite frankly, I enjoyed it.

DSCrankshaw
2009-10-15, 03:32 AM
Let's see if I can remember...

Our party had captured a cultist of Tharizdun. Others in the party had tried to intimidate her, but had no luck... until my rogue had this to say: "You know, these folks can threaten to kill you, but as far as I can tell, you're not afraid of dying, so that's not really much of a threat, is it? Personally, I don't see why we should bother. See that half-giant over there?" He points to the half-giant psychic warrior. "I don't know how much you know about half-giants, but they're all psionic. We don't really need you to talk--we can just get him to tell us what you know. Of course, to do so, he's going to have to eat your brain. Don't worry, though: he doesn't need all of it. He'll leave you just enough that you can continue on as a drooling, witless beggar, unable to speak or even think intelligibly, but vaguely aware that something horrible has happened to you, that there should be something more to life but you can never, ever have it. I'm not sure there'll be enough left of you to appreciate it should your dark god ever break free and devour the world." He pauses before continuing, "Unfortunately, the half-giant always gets a tummy-ache when he eats brains, and I'll have to be up with him all night again. Unless you want to save us the trouble and tell us what you know." After one doozy of a bluff check, and a respectable intimidate, the cultist told us everything.

Longcat
2009-10-15, 03:59 AM
"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who in the name of charity and goodwill shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."

Dixieboy
2009-10-15, 04:22 AM
I just posted it because quite frankly, I enjoyed it.You sir, are a very sick individual. :smallwink:

elliott20
2009-10-15, 04:37 AM
this was in a sci-fi game I played


"Now, now, sir. Just because Jenner here has been overpowered twice in the last two days, not to mentioned is guilty of failing at one of his core responsible duties as security sargeant, as well as various OTHER acts of trangression, doesn't mean we can't extend a level of civility that is deserving to those who aid us in our investigation. Heck, perhaps in light of this cooperation, we might be able to ask the court marshal to go a little easier on you." Walker said with a wide grin on his face, enjoying this moment immensely.

Jenner looks up into Walker's eyes, resentment mixed with fear filled in them.

"Now, now, Jenner, behave. I know how tempting it is for you want to tell me to go **** off right now. But let me assure you, there's gonna come a time when you're sitting a solitary cell with no lights, no toilet, no space, just a closet with airholes poked in to make sure you don't die. The guards haven't fed you in a billion years cuz, heh, why bother? That or they've just all forgotten you're alive. You're going to be sitting there in the dark, contemplating whether or not to eat your own ****. And in that very moment, you're going to wish like you never wished before, that in this moment, you kissed my ass like it was a goddamn organized olympic event. So tell me, who killed the General?"

Tokiko Mima
2009-10-15, 04:46 AM
After activating a spell that creates a world with an unlimited number of swords:

"Here I come, King of Heroes- do you have enough weapons in stock?" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NC0ywEUQ2Xc)

Drager
2009-10-15, 05:13 AM
Said by a Lawful Good cleric with no intention of being intimidating when leaving a prisoner in the care of a Half-Drow Assassin. The prisoner knows of the Drow's predelictions, the cleric not.

"I'm just stepping out for 5 minutes."

Korivan
2009-10-15, 07:41 AM
"You wanted my powers??? Where would you like them? Down your throat or up your @$$."

"Stop talking...I want to enjoy this..."

"Come then, let us dance with Death."

"I've watched you sleep. Examaned you and your equipment...Did you find the pregnate spider I left for you?"

The darker the line, the more bone chilling, thus more intimidating I think.

Temet Nosce
2009-10-15, 08:11 AM
Rolling intimidate is for people who aren't inventive enough. Here are two recent examples and a couple of random others.

1. "Oops", said with soft malice. This one requires a bit of explanation I guess. I needed some information from two NPCs, and I was bored so I ran a custom poison by the DM (it swelled and then dessicated flesh in a small area) which I later demonstrated on the eyelids of one of my new friends. At first my character said nothing, then after she applied the poison to his eyelids she offered him the choice of whether she should cut the eyelids off or leave him blind. She "slipped" while cutting them off and "accidentally" nicked one eyeball with the poisoned dagger... They were spouting information without even being asked. The other players nominated me for an "achievement" (that games method of advancement) for the torture scene.

2. Absolutely nothing. Someone was being obstructive, so my character pinned his hand to the table with a dagger then smiled and knocked his chair out from under him so that his own weight tore his hand off.

3. "Are you quite enjoying your meal? Your friends truly helped make this delicious.", do I really need to explain this? I suspect you got it the moment I mentioned food. If you need a hint, cannibalism is alive and well.

4. "I have a limited amount of time, and while I'm sure my allies would be nearly as delighted as I would to make you shriek and squirm the clock is ticking. So I'll be clear, I'm going to select one of you and then I'm going to enchant him so that he'll dedicate the rest of his life to erasing everything he's ever achieved. When he's done that, he'll kill himself in such a way that no one will even remember he existed. After that, I'm going to give you all a chance to answer my questions and if I'm not satisfied why... I might just have to get inventive."

bosssmiley
2009-10-15, 08:17 AM
*Pffffft* Amateurs. Basic Instructions (http://www.basicinstructions.net/) shows us the way:


http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_0TdtycCxOI8/SHaDOWLdhQI/AAAAAAAAAkU/lT1TaT71ooY/s400/poncho.jpg

It's all in the eyes. :smallwink:

Lost Demiurge
2009-10-15, 09:38 AM
#1: Shadowrun. I was playing a kinesics adept/martial artist, sort of a highly social Bruce Lee type. We'd just ambushed a pair of medics who'd done bad, bad things. We didn't know just quite WHAT they'd done, though. We'd gassed them as they slept and taken them for a drive in their own ambulance, and I decided to get creative. After all, there were a ton of tools, drugs, and supplies around...

So they wake up in darkness, hands and legs bound. Then ZIIIP, I open the body bag the first one's in. I'm dressed in surgical scrubs, gloves, and a mask with a light shining down over my shoulder and a motorized bonesaw in my hand.

"Start. Talking."

VzzzzZZZZ! As I rev the bonesaw.

He talks.

Other one does too.



#2: Also from Shadowrun, but this one's not mine. I was the GM... The words are mine, but the setup and basics are taken from the module.

So, basically, the PC's are doing a vision quest kinda deal after a magical gem, on behalf of Hestaby. She's a fairly nice dragon. They're doing some inconvenience to Lofwyr, a dragon who is NOT nice. Lofwyr is the CEO of Saeder-Krupp, a mega-corporation that runs a good chunk of Europe. He has money. He has minions. He can personally devour any of the PC's if it comes to direct combat. He's got Magic with a capital M. But thanks to the situation right now and Hestaby's manipulations, he can't touch the PC's directly. Nonetheless, he catches them in the act. They talk, and he lays down his ultimatum.

"In three minutes, I must depart. I will be leaving the gem unguarded. There is nothing to stand in your way, and prevent you from taking the gem. I accept this."

"I ask that when the time comes, instead of giving the gem to Hestaby, you present it to me."

"For this service, I will give you anything you desire, within reason. One million nuyen worth of goods, services, or favors for each of you. Cyberware or bioware? Eminently acceptable. Magical power? Easy. Political power? I can provide contacts, campaign funds, a clean background, and an IN with any group of your choice."

"Anything you desire. Within reason. That is what you will gain, should you accept my offer."

"However."

"Should you choose to refuse my offer, then I shall reverse it, and use it against you."

"I shall devote one million nuyen worth of my assets against each of you. I shall delegate its use to my underlings, who will find what you cherish, track what you enjoy, target those who make your life worth living, and finally, hire skilled people to oppose each of you directly. Everyone that you call a friend shall be harmed because of your choice. Some will die. Some will merely suffer setbacks, but each one, I assure you, will be painful and significant. Your assets will be seized, your false identities shall not hide you. Your enemies will be appraised of your plans, whereabouts, and weaknesses. Your goals will be, if not impossible, hindered in such a fashion that you will never achieve anything of worth without great sacrifice. Some of you will die, if this process is initiated. Some of you will not. If you manage to survive the process, then I shall pursue no further agenda against you. But by the time that is done, I doubt that fact shall give you much joy."

"One million nuyen worth of torment. That is what will happen, should you refuse my offer."

"I depart now. Take your time, consider your options carefully. Good day."

They talked it over. Oh, did they talk it over. Finally decided to stick with the original job, but damn if it wasn't a close vote.

Hestaby ended up giving the gem back to Lofwyr anyway. They're hoping that L won't follow through with his threat, because of that.

Unfortunately, Lofwyr's a dragon of his word...

Devils_Blind
2009-10-15, 01:50 PM
"Did you know, paladin, that the human body, stripped down to its core, has a much harder time being evil than being good? It's all the extra accessories and redundancies that make humans so easy to tempt.

For example. If I were to cut of this prisoners toes, he would never be able to run from justice again. Cut out a kidney, a bit of the liver, and he'll have worry so much more about just how much he has to drink at the tavern.

And his fingers. Oh paladin. Idle hands are a devil's playground. And all those extra fingers humans have, at least one or two is always idle. But if you take his pinky, he'll never be able to properly wield a dagger again. Take the ring, and he'll drop his sword as soon as he tries to land a blow. Take the middle, and aside from the rude gestures he'll no longer make, he'll never be able to handle his tools again. No picking locks, no tying knots, no forging papers. A man really only needs one finger and his thumb to be able to feed himself. And thats just on one hand. You want him to be an ascetic, thats all he'll need.

I won't even get into what we can do to keep him from giving in to his carnal lusts."

Teifling, simultaneously terrorizing a prisoner and trying to "persuade" a PC paladin into a "campaign of justice" against the criminals of the city.

EndlessWrath
2009-10-15, 02:35 PM
Favorite of all time was of course in a B5 game. True rip off from the show >.<

"Step aside ambassador, this is an Earth problem, do not make us start targeting your ships.

"Why not? There is only 1 human captain who has ever defeated a Minbari ship ever. He is behind me. You are in front of me. If I were you, I'd be somewhere else.

-----------
"I have adventured for 50 years my friend..I've seen slaughtered villages, cannibal cults feasting upon women and children...horrific monsters that prey on your every thought and fear...So believe me when I tell you...You better just tell my buddy what he wants to know. The stuff I've seen him do do still gives me nightmares."

(after slicing off the man's hand as he was trying to start a bar fight)
"Got your finger..."

More to come when i remember them.

(Edit: Wish this was a real one XD :elan: "Do it or I'll make a pun."
:vaarsuvius: "Do it or I'll fry you with lightning before he can make a pun.")
-Wrath

Count Dravda
2009-10-15, 02:42 PM
Spoiler Alert: The following contains info about Red Hand of Doom. If you're about to play it/are playing it right now, don't read this.

After the PCs returned the Ghostlord's phylactery to him, the Ghostlord's face stretches in an eerie smile. "I'm going to count to ten, and then I'm going to kill every mortal within half a mile of this building.

One."

(Entire party runs for it, the screams of dying hobgoblins on their heels.)

Star wars campaign:

Prisoner: Let me guess, Jedi. If I don't give you the security codes, your droid over there will kill me.
Assassin droid: *extends spring-loaded vibroblade*
Dark Jedi: No, no, no. We're going to kill you either way. The only question now is how long it takes.


(Someone once laid a hand on one of my characters.) "Ten second rule, human. Five more seconds and that hand is MINE."

Most intimidating and badass thing I ever read wasn't a quote but a simple action. In a Star Wars book, IG-88 (that assassin droid in Episode V) was ambushed by a bunch of battle arachnids. Coldly, it jumped onto one, primed a grenade, shoved it down the thing's throat and held it there. One bloody, wet explosion later, IG-88 needed a new arm and a new paint job.

AtwasAwamps
2009-10-15, 03:01 PM
There is way too much evil up in here.

“Look at my sword. It’s not hard to see when it’s an inch away from your face. Do you see the glow? Do you feel the heat, the fury, the power that flows around it? The strength that rests in the very palm of my hand because of the purity and truth that I have devoted myself to, that I have sacrificed for, that I have represented with my body and soul and mind regardless of what you have thrown at me?

I can bring the light to you in one of two ways. Choose.”

“Surrender or face the anger of a righteous man.”

“The blood of countless men stain this floor. The head of one shall rest upon it, if that weapon does not leave your grasp.”

“My church and my honor demands your surrender. My god and my gut demand your head.”

Yukitsu
2009-10-15, 03:02 PM
Best in character was apparantly: "Of all of your allies I've taken, I've yet to kill a single one. Would you like for me to show you what I've done?"

And: "I specialize in magic of pain, torment and wracking afflictions, but I like to fancy myself as one who is best at keeping others alive."

ShneekeyTheLost
2009-10-15, 03:17 PM
The trick with Intimidation is not to threaten the target. Often times, an individual will steel themselves for whatever may come their way.

No, the trick is to make them believe that you enjoy it. That you would really prefer that they NOT do it, so that you may continue with your hobby, nay, your passion. Your calling. Your very reason for continuing your meager, pitiful existence.

The other way is to simply be so dispassionate, mechanical, and devoid of any trace of 'humanity'. I suppose "Clinical" would be a good way to describe it, in as much as it is more akin to an individual going about an experiment, and cataloging the results of said experiment. Of course, no one particularly cares about the bacteria culture when one is done with it.

Consider, if you will Victor Cachet from the book Crown of Slaves. He was an intimidating man, when he chose to be, because he has absolutely zero hesitation or qualms in doing anything which might further his cause. None. Whatsoever. And he projects this when he wishes to be intimidating. The targets? Inconveniences. Possibly useful, possibly not. If not, then there is simply no point in continuing. But, just maybe, they might be able to provide enough useful information that things won't get carried on too long.

AtwasAwamps
2009-10-15, 03:23 PM
Meh. I think the trick to intimidation is to make the target perceive a threat in a manner that makes them desire to avoid the threatened circumstance at all costs.

Different types use different methods and different methods are effective on different psyches. Not all intimidating tactics have to rely on the "I AM SO EVIL AND I GOING TO TORTURE YOU FOREVER" method, or just "squicking" out your target.

Dr Bwaa
2009-10-15, 03:29 PM
@^: IG-88 is the man. Bot. Assassin.


This wasn't an intimidating statement so much, but it sure was terrifying: one of my friends has a paladin who (we were about level 14 in 3.53), during a huge demonic uprising in the nation's capital, was going toe-to-toe with a Horned Devil. After a few rounds, the Devil started flying and just hurling fireballs, and while the pally was making the saves easily, he couldn't fight back without a flying mount. Unfortunately, none was available and no one could summon one suitable, so he got a Fly spell from a distracted wizard and just went at it mano-a-mano. Then, the Devil got lucky and summoned another horned devil. Completely unperturbed, the flying Paladin closed on the first one that he'd been fighting, grappled it somehow in the air, and then proceeded to use Smite Evil--diving out of the sky, impaling the Devil on the cathedral spire for massive damage and the end of the battle (for the time being, anyway).

ToH spoiler:
You know the part where the PCs think they've killed Acererak and the Tomb proceeds to "collaspe" around them? And the directions specifically say that they are not entitled to a Will save, because they are actually making metagame Will saves against the DM telling them what's happening? Ridiculous (and worked exceedingly well against my players :smalltongue:)

A few other things:

-casually bringing up in conversation a topic that the (probably PC) thought (read: specified in backstory) no one else knew about. Example: Darth Vader: "Hey, Luke, how's your sister, by the way?"

-"I killed that miserable old fool."

-"Look, you can either give me what I want, or... well, I've got Disjunction prepared, but I hope it won't come to that."

-"Quickened Disintegrate" (or the like)

-I had a great one when I originally clicked "Reply," but I've forgotten it, so if I remember I'll put it in here :smalltongue:

*.*.*.*
2009-10-15, 03:32 PM
Me to another player: "I'm going to kill you with my bare hands! I will go find a bear, kill it, chop of its hands, and then kill you with my bear hands!"

Tyrmatt
2009-10-15, 03:36 PM
"My turn."
Said after taking a critical hit but appearing utterly unfazed. I was a sink of hitpoints in that campaign. The DM was a little worried at that point as he was trying to pop me so he could take his shots at the casters without interference.

The Rose Dragon
2009-10-15, 03:37 PM
"We can do this the easy way or the hard way."

*party shows aggression, opponent brandishes sword / prepares magic / whatever*

"Easy way it is."

Clementx
2009-10-15, 04:16 PM
This one is from The Name of the Wind, where Kvothe needs to get 75 miles as soon as possible to find his family's killers. So he goes to a horse merchant and tells him he will be buying a horse in ten minutes. After the first display...

"You have just wasted two precious minutes of my time, so I'm guessing you still don't understand my position here. Let me be as plain as possible. I want a fast horse ready for hard riding today. For this I will pay quickly, in hard coin, and without complaint.

"If you sell me a horse that throws a shoe, or starts to limp, or spooks at shadows, I will miss a valuable opportunity. A quite unrecoverable opportunity. If that happens, I will not come back and demand a refund. I will not petition the constable. I will back to Imre this very night and set fire to your house. Then, when you run out of the front door in your nightshirt and stockle-cap, I will kill you, cook you, and eat you. Right there on your lawn while all your neighbors watch.

"This is the business arrangement I am proposing, Kaerva. If you are not comfortable with it, tell me and I will go elsewhere. Otherwise, leave off this parade of drays and show me a real horse."

Thatguyoverther
2009-10-15, 04:19 PM
"Tell me. And remember, this is for posterity so be honest. How do you feel?"

Karoht
2009-10-15, 04:25 PM
While holding a very rusty hatchet, half-orc, about to interrogate a Kobold.

"How much do you like your toes? I'm so bored of collecting ears. Everyone collects those."


As for intimidating/combat starting...

THIS! IS! (Insert name of place)!!! *kick/shield bash/mace to the face/sword to the gizzard*

or maybe...
I scry with my little eye, something that starts with SURPRISE ROUND!

Remember, if you can't kill them before they roll initiative, your party Rogue was obviously not in flanking position.

Cespenar
2009-10-15, 04:39 PM
stuff

Heh, this one was good.

Karoht
2009-10-15, 04:42 PM
I am a man of the Arena,
My face marred with dust and sweat and blood,
Who at best knows the heady feeling of high achievement and,
Who at worst fails, but at least fails while daring greatly
So that my place will never be
With those cold and timid souls
Who know neither
Victory nor Defeat.

Glass Mouse
2009-10-15, 05:56 PM
Yay, tag-teaming!


We've captured a guy and need to question him. A Malar priest of some sorts. Since he knows magic, we've got him gagged, but let one hand stay free.

Saromihe: Now, we want you to tell us what you know. *hands him pen and paper* You'll write down the answers to our questions.
NPC: *refuses*
Seymore: *maniac smile* Y'know, we could make you cry it out instead...
Saromihe: Ahh, yeah. *turns to NPC and pulls out a knife* I could make the next hours the worst in your life.
Seymore: Hours? Days!
Saromihe: *smiles expectantly* Weeks.
NPC: *starts looking nervous*
Seymore: I could use my magic - you've seen me use it - I can get veeery creative.
Saromihe: He can indeed. *kneels down next to NPC* While I...? I'll enjoy it. I'll keep cutting you, I'll make you wish you were dead, I'll bring you to the brink - and then I'll heal you up and start over.
Seymore: She will. Trust me.
Saromihe: And when I need to sleep? Well, I've got two friends... What say you, Seymore?
Seymore: *shrugs* Don't waste your healing on this scum. I'll take care of him. Yes... I'll make him live out his worst nightmares, awake and with nowhere to run. I'll...-
Saromihe: *gently, to NPC* So, just tell us what we need to know, and we might...-
Seymore: Don't interrupt me.
Saromihe: ... might... give you a quick death.
NPC: *spills some basic information, then shuts up again when we get to the juicy stuff*
Saromihe: He's getting resistant.
Seymore: Maybe we should spice it up a little.
Saromihe: *smiles evily* We'll cut off a finger. He doesn't need them all, does he?
Seymore: Actually, yeah... We need him to write.
Saromihe: ...right.
Baobaris: He doesn't need both feet.
Seymore: *enthusiastic* You're right, he doesn't.
Saromihe: *hands Baobaris a club* Do your worst.
Baobaris: *determined, not smiling at all* He deserves it. *crushes NPCs foot*
NPC: Mrrf! *curls over in pain*
Saromihe: Now, then, do you feel like coorporating now?
NPC: *nods painfully, writes down what we need to know... including where he found a quest item*
Seymore: Right. *to the others* It's not far, we'll make it in half an hour. Let's go.
Saromihe: *to NPC* You'll come along.
NPC: *muffled protests*
Baobaris: His foot...
Saromihe: He'll walk it off.
Seymore: *laughs, start walking*
Baobaris: *follows*
Saromihe: *smiles at NPC, then pushes him along*

He obeyed our every order after that.

Siosilvar
2009-10-15, 06:20 PM
"Tell me. And remember, this is for posterity so be honest. How do you feel?"

"As you know, the concept of the suction pump is centuries old. Really that's all this is, except that instead of sucking water, I'm sucking life. I've just sucked one year of your life away."

Alternately,

"I know something you don't know."

...

"I'm not left handed."

Choco
2009-10-15, 06:22 PM
"Congratulations, you now have my undivided attention" - after surviving a lucky critical hit from one mook who was trying to protect the enemy leader I was pwning (2 points to whoever gets the reference... man that was perfect)

"Mindrape" - all you need for interrogations!

elliott20
2009-10-15, 09:56 PM
There was also my paladin from a campaign way back in college. He was faced against fighter who was blocking his way. My paladin, by this point, had already figured out he was a much lower level character who really didn't not stand much of a chance to defeat him.

"I wouldn't bother with that if I were you. Fact is, you can't win against me. I'm not saying this to be conceited, to posture myself, or even as just a wild boast. I simply know this as a fact.

Why do I know this? Because I've fought, sometimes victoriously and sometimes barely surviving, forces that reaches beyond your furthest imaginations. I've stared into the eyes of monsters that can melt your flesh off with a single gesture, and survived. I've fought warriors who can topple armies with a pair of chopsticks (it's actually true in this case). And I've survived things that no human being has any business surviving. Sometimes I wish I hadn't survived those things myself, for it scares me what powers are held within me and what I'm truly capable of.

Now put down your sword, and let me pass. Please."

The fact that said paladin also had a reputation as a fantastic warrior also gave a nice +2 bonus to the intimidation check too.

Danin
2009-10-16, 12:37 AM
"Young sir, I am going to spend these next few moments educating you about myself. I am a wizard. You have seen wizards before, yes? Well, I happen to have a specialty. I know things. If I don't know them, I find them out, and when I do know them, I act upon that information. For example, my spells have told me, Dexter Calloras, that you are 31, live at 608 Sudburry drive with your wife, Grace, and your son and daughter, Kyle and Naomi, respectively. Your father was killed in a farming accident many years ago, but your surviving mother, Maddison, lives at 408 Kingsburrow avenue in the town of Turag where she makes a fair living as a seamstress. She is currently dating a fine young gentleman named Jordan Haustaug, a widower himself. Did you know that Dexter? I know how you hate people calling you Dex, and I wouldn't want to offend or anything.

I know that your sister, Cara, is unhappy with her husband, Scott. I know your brother Darrian recently had his hours at the mill cut back. I know your best friends, Alex and Jim who live at 57 Potters road and 424 Bakers street respectively, will be meeting at your favorite tavern, the gilded rose, at 6:20 this evening. You see, Dexter, I know things.

Unfortunately for me, your employer has taken steps against my more conventional means of getting information. This has forced me to explore more mundane options. I am forced to rely upon what people tell me in regards to your employer. Unfortunately for you, I need a means by which to ensure their honesty.

So, Dex. Sorry, Dexter. I am going to offer you one chance to help me avoid going through a great deal many unnecessary inconveniences. I am going to ask you once: Who is your employer, why is he after us, what are his plans and how could I best strike at him.

Think carefully now Dexter. I would greatly appreciate some honesty. Because know this: If you refuse to answer just one question. If I think for one moment you are holding back on me in any way shape or form. Even if you gloss over one minor, inconsequential detail and I know about it, and I will know about it, I am going to pay a visit to each and every person you have ever cared about, and see what I could to about persuading them to aid in my making you see reason. And they will know that whatever I do to them, you could have stopped, but refused to save them. Finally, once I have visited the last person you have ever cared about, I will return and offer you a second chance to help me learn. And should you refuse then? Well, I'll just have to get especially creative.

So Dexter, what do you know?"


Said the diviner to the prisoner.

Lycan 01
2009-10-16, 12:51 AM
Oh come on, you gotta tell us what he said! :smallbiggrin:

Seriously, I'd like to know what the reactions were to a lot of these quotes...

Longcat
2009-10-16, 01:02 AM
"I'ma call a coupla hard, pipe-hittin' n*gg*rs, who'll go to work on the homes here with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch." - Marsellus Wallace

Jergmo
2009-10-16, 01:08 AM
My rogue was involved in rooting out and destroying a cult of necromancers and was doing well, ending up with a female necromancer trapped in her bed chambers, and she was interrogating her. The necromancer scoffed at her, the non-violent route not working. She said something along the lines of "If I tell you, my master will kill me!"

So, I took a different approach. She wouldn't have actually done it, but she's one heck of a good bluffer. She held up her dagger, looked at her dead in the eye, and said "Tell me or I'll cut your tits off." After that, interrogation became pretty darn easy. :smallamused:

Oh! I just remembered, my mad doctor lich! He was a caretaker for a number of undead in all shapes and form who had escaped from a large cult of necromancers that were spread across the continent - he ended up with one of the necromancers imprisoned when they had been trying to retrieve some of his wards. He strapped the man to the table and all the while he was perfectly polite about the whole ordeal. The only thing was, while their little "talk" was going on, he was going to work on him with a scalpel. That may not count, but his manner of speech made it a lot more unsettling.

And then there's my red half-dragon sorcerer, who was a dragonkin supremacist and was raising an army in hopes of conquering the elves, humans, and orcs in the region. He had tied a Xvart to a tree from a clan that were enslaving tribes of kobolds that they had liberated, and he was interrogating him. This was intimidating more to the people serving under him and his peers.
Throughout the night, in the camps they could hear the Xvart screaming, and every time he refused to give out information, something new was bitten off or sliced into. It kept many a kobold hatchling awake and horrified, as well as their parents. When he returned to the camp, he was holding the Xvart's tongue*, walking up to his peer Kabroth, a red half-dragon barbarian. He dropped the tongue in front of him and started walking to his tent, saying "He's still alive."

*d'oh, fixed.

ShneekeyTheLost
2009-10-16, 01:17 AM
v: No, what you have are bullets, and the hope that when your guns are empty I'm no longer be standing, because if I am you'll all be dead before you've reloaded.
Creedy: That's impossible. Kill him.
[the fingermen open fire on V, but he still stands after their clips are empty]
V: My turn.
[V proceeds to kill all fingermen with his knives before they manage to reload]

Schylerwalker
2009-10-16, 04:32 AM
One of my favorite terrifying lines is from a rather popular computer game; Diablo 2. You've just fought past a horde of terrifying monsters, including three lords of hell, activated five profane seals...and then the hellish temple starts to shake and a red light comes from nowhere. This deep, terrible voice, filled with malice and a lust for death and violence, comes from everywhere and nowhere;

"Not even death cane save you from me."

And the most terrible part of this statement? It's true. This is Diablo; the Lord of Terror; the goddamn king of HELL ITSELF. If you die, here, in his domain, at his claws? You're f----d. Your soul is going straight to him.

A lot of the lines from that game were great. Oh, man, how could I forget?! Tyrael's line, at the end of Act 2!! The Dark Wanderer is stepping forward, about to yank about Baal's soulstone, when this tendril of crackling white energy wraps around his arm, and...

"Stop! The beast contained herein shall not be set free...not even by you."

Dixieboy
2009-10-16, 07:49 AM
Yay, tag-teaming!


We've captured a guy and need to question him. A Malar priest of some sorts. Since he knows magic, we've got him gagged, but let one hand stay free.

Saromihe: Now, we want you to tell us what you know. *hands him pen and paper* You'll write down the answers to our questions.
NPC: *refuses*
Seymore: *maniac smile* Y'know, we could make you cry it out instead...
Saromihe: Ahh, yeah. *turns to NPC and pulls out a knife* I could make the next hours the worst in your life.
Seymore: Hours? Days!
Saromihe: *smiles expectantly* Weeks.
NPC: *starts looking nervous*
Seymore: I could use my magic - you've seen me use it - I can get veeery creative.
Saromihe: He can indeed. *kneels down next to NPC* While I...? I'll enjoy it. I'll keep cutting you, I'll make you wish you were dead, I'll bring you to the brink - and then I'll heal you up and start over.
Seymore: She will. Trust me.
Saromihe: And when I need to sleep? Well, I've got two friends... What say you, Seymore?
Seymore: *shrugs* Don't waste your healing on this scum. I'll take care of him. Yes... I'll make him live out his worst nightmares, awake and with nowhere to run. I'll...-
Saromihe: *gently, to NPC* So, just tell us what we need to know, and we might...-
Seymore: Don't interrupt me.
Saromihe: ... might... give you a quick death.
NPC: *spills some basic information, then shuts up again when we get to the juicy stuff*
Saromihe: He's getting resistant.
Seymore: Maybe we should spice it up a little.
Saromihe: *smiles evily* We'll cut off a finger. He doesn't need them all, does he?
Seymore: Actually, yeah... We need him to write.
Saromihe: ...right.
Baobaris: He doesn't need both feet.
Seymore: *enthusiastic* You're right, he doesn't.
Saromihe: *hands Baobaris a club* Do your worst.
Baobaris: *determined, not smiling at all* He deserves it. *crushes NPCs foot*
NPC: Mrrf! *curls over in pain*
Saromihe: Now, then, do you feel like coorporating now?
NPC: *nods painfully, writes down what we need to know... including where he found a quest item*
Seymore: Right. *to the others* It's not far, we'll make it in half an hour. Let's go.
Saromihe: *to NPC* You'll come along.
NPC: *muffled protests*
Baobaris: His foot...
Saromihe: He'll walk it off.
Seymore: *laughs, start walking*
Baobaris: *follows*
Saromihe: *smiles at NPC, then pushes him along*

He obeyed our every order after that.


I'd like to point out that what you could possibly do would probably not be much worse than whatever initiation ritual he had to go through to actually BECOME a cleric of malar.

Their way of praying would be considered torture by some.
Just throwing it out there.

Saph
2009-10-16, 08:12 AM
Have to say, most of these aren't actually intimidating. Most of them come off as trying too hard; the speaker is trying to be scary, and making it obvious. In particular, reciting your life story to someone isn't scary, it sounds like you're trying to impress them. :)

The ones I thought were most effective were these two:


"I shall devote one million nuyen worth of my assets against each of you. I shall delegate its use to my underlings, who will find what you cherish, track what you enjoy, target those who make your life worth living, and finally, hire skilled people to oppose each of you directly. Everyone that you call a friend shall be harmed because of your choice. Some will die. Some will merely suffer setbacks, but each one, I assure you, will be painful and significant. Your assets will be seized, your false identities shall not hide you. Your enemies will be appraised of your plans, whereabouts, and weaknesses. Your goals will be, if not impossible, hindered in such a fashion that you will never achieve anything of worth without great sacrifice. Some of you will die, if this process is initiated. Some of you will not. If you manage to survive the process, then I shall pursue no further agenda against you. But by the time that is done, I doubt that fact shall give you much joy."


Prisoner: Let me guess, Jedi. If I don't give you the security codes, your droid over there will kill me.
Assassin droid: *extends spring-loaded vibroblade*
Dark Jedi: No, no, no. We're going to kill you either way. The only question now is how long it takes.

Avilan the Grey
2009-10-16, 08:42 AM
Depending on your character, a simple "Good evening" or "hello" might work :smallcool:

Asheram
2009-10-16, 09:09 AM
"Onward, Gimp!" Said in an awfully cheerful voice after we had captured an outlaw.

We had bound his arms behind his back and gagged him, connected to us by a 20 feet rope... He was our trap tester...

Aah.. I really liked that guy... He only laster about 20 minutes before being impaled on a spear and bled out before we remembered to heal him.

Choco
2009-10-16, 09:16 AM
Forgot this one. I was the DM, and the players bought a very high ranking and important prisoner to their mad scientist NPC friend, who owed them a big favor for saving his @$$ earlier, for interrogation (they knew this person had information and was trained to resist interrogation, but they all sucked at interrogations and every skill that could be used in them, so they decided to go the "safe" route rather than risk killing the guy). The prisoner is tied to an operating table, still knocked out, and the moment he awakens the scientist stats his "operation".

*about 15 minutes of cutting, disfiguring, tube-attaching, screaming, crying, etc.*
Prisoner: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!? PLEASE, I HAVE A FAMILY! *sobs*
Scientist (about 10 minutes of "operating" later, the prisoner is basically disfigured beyond recognition and attached to various machines): *points to PC's* "I owe them a big favor, and you have some information they need. We are within a Zone of Truth, so know that neither of us can lie. I can keep you here, in a progressively worse condition, as long as it takes. I have spent centuries studying the human body, I know exactly what it needs to survive and remain lucid, if only barely. What you are experiencing now is but a small fraction of the pain and discomfort a human body is capable of experiencing. The sooner you volunteer everything you know about <insert conspiracy here>, the sooner this will be over, I can fix you up good as new, and we can all go home happy. *said with a sincere smile*

Master_Rahl22
2009-10-16, 09:44 AM
I agree with Saph that some of these are trying to hard. The most intimidating thing I've encountered in a game was early in a campaign. Our DM didn't like how easy it is to be resurrected, so he made it so that the only Cleric high enough level was the head of Pelor's church, and even then he didn't have access to True Resurrection. We had just helped an elf Sorcerer defend a city from an invading army, and she had told us that the High Council needed to be informed about some things we discovered about the army. We were escorting her to the elf capital when we were stopped by a half-dragon radiating an aura of evil. The first thing he did was use Power Word: Kill on the elf. Keep in mind, this is right at the start of the campaign, so we're level 2. He collected her body and said, "It's much easier to hold someone captive when they're dead. You will bring the head of the church to {location} in 3 weeks time or I will find you and do the same to each of you." The Paladin with 7 Int decided that he couldn't let this evil act slide, and charged with a cry of, "Die, evildoer!" The half-dragon Disintigrated him. No coming back for that dude, ever, with True Resurrection unavailable. We were definitely inclined to go get the head of the church after that.

SmartAlec
2009-10-16, 10:12 AM
Coming after the usual overdone intimidation speech from the rogue, the wizard adpts a concerned, worried face, and whispers to the prisoner once the rogue's back is turned:

"You should really do what he says, I don't think he even cleans those knives once he's done."

***

And another, from the (somewhat warped) fighter. After the party's overcome a particular (male) villain's henchmen and have forced him onto the defensive, the fighter grins, raises his sword and exclaims:

"You're my wife now!"

On the surface it was just a quote from the BBC's The League of Gentlemen, but IC it suggested all kinds of worrying things about the Fighter. Not a man you wanted to be in the power of.

Jera
2009-10-16, 11:49 AM
From my Cleric of Zagyg I had this last year.

Here is the thing, I forgot to prepair speak with dead today. You have 8 hours before I come back here and get to work. My friends will be in the room whilst I go take a nap.

OutlawJT
2009-10-16, 01:38 PM
One of my favorite intimidating quotes in game "Gruk Gruk, Nooooooo!"
It's also one of the funniest lines from that game but you really had to be there to appreciate it. For reference, Gruk Gruk was a very well built 4th edition charge oriented barbarian and other people in the party shouting that line became a running gag every time Gruk Gruk was about to charge something. It got to the point where enemies would flee for cover every time someone in our party shouted "Gruk Gruk, Noooooo!"

RandomLunatic
2009-10-16, 03:31 PM
Another tag-team effort, this one from a game of Slayers d20.

My Gunslinger and a Black Mage just defeated an ambush by bandits, when we discovered one was still alive. We agreed to tie him up, wake him up, and question him good cop/bad cop style. We now tune in to our interrogation in process...

Gunslinger: Now, I wanted to just blow your head off and be done with it, but my friend here convinced me it would be better to let you talk to save your life.
Black Mage: It didn't take an awful lot of effort.
G: Why you... *BLAM* *Pistol-whips the BM unconcious with the empty pistol.*1
G: *Huff-Puff!* Now where was I?
Prisoner: Please don't hurt me!

1-The BM was half-troll, which gave him fast healing, so I frequently resorted to corporal punishment when he did something stupid. Not that the prisoner knew that.

Quietus
2009-10-16, 04:09 PM
Doesn't really count as intimidation, honestly, but ... An old favorite of mine, from an exceptionally high level necromancer I play(ed), with 40+ DC's on his necromancy spells. He needed a particularly rare piece of information, and needed it quickly, and this poor rune-covered elf happened to have it.

"I will explain myself exactly once. Either you will tell me exactly what I wish to know - and I WILL know if you're lying - or I will kill you and ask your corpse. You have six seconds."

Only reason it's not really intimidation is because.. it was truth. DC 40+ speak with dead is very hard to resist, and Keldarin is exceptionally confident in his spells, for good reason.

ondonaflash
2009-10-16, 04:27 PM
Mal: Now, this is all the money Niska gave us in advance. You bring it back to him. Tell him the job didn't work out. We're not thieves. But we are thieves. Point is, we're not takin' what's his. Now we'll stay out of his way as best we can from here on in. You explain that's best for everyone, okay?
Crow: Keep the money. Use it to buy a funeral. It doesn't matter where you go or how far you fly. I will hunt you down, and the last thing you see will be my blade.
Mal: Darn.
[Kicks Crow through running engines. Next bad guy is brought forward]
Mal: Now, this is all the money Niska gave us in advance...
One of Niska's Soldiers: Oh, I get it! I'm good. Best thing for everyone. I'm right there with ya.

John Campbell
2009-10-16, 04:37 PM
"Mindrape" - all you need for interrogations!

Ew, no. I'll threaten to consume someone's soul if they don't answer my questions, and follow through if they make it necessary, but I won't lower myself to using that spell.

Count Dravda
2009-10-16, 06:14 PM
Have to say, most of these aren't actually intimidating. Most of them come off as trying too hard; the speaker is trying to be scary, and making it obvious. In particular, reciting your life story to someone isn't scary, it sounds like you're trying to impress them. :)

Probably a case of "you had to be there."

Out of curiosity, and not to sound like a newbie, what is Mindrape?

-Count Dravda

Random832
2009-10-16, 06:15 PM
It's a 9th-level wizard spell from the Book of Vile Darkness.

Count Dravda
2009-10-16, 06:18 PM
Wow, that was fast. Thank you. Looks like this list (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/lists/spells) is incomplete.

Starbuck_II
2009-10-16, 06:19 PM
Probably a case of "you had to be there."

Out of curiosity, and not to sound like a newbie, what is Mindrape?

-Count Dravda

Think of a spell that rewrites your entire being like a fanfic of a popular book. That is Mindrape. You are no longer you. You don't act as you and you like it. The name sums it up: Rape of your mental facilities.

ondonaflash
2009-10-17, 06:11 AM
To a ghost that switched possessing a commoner to trying to possess my character. "You really should have considered this more thoroughly. Because now you are trapped in my mind. Lets see how many ways there are to break a man after he's died."

He wasn't really trying to, you know, get anything, but he did turn a ghost into an allip with his mind.

Oh! Duh! Also the quote in my signature. "I regret to inform you that you have imposed yourself directly between me and child. Take solace in the fact that your death will be as quick as it is painful."

D_Lord
2009-10-17, 10:52 AM
"Hehhe hey want to play? I got a new toy to play with."

Said the crazy Far Realms Elder Evil. The toy, the soul of a Greater God.

Glass Mouse
2009-10-17, 11:26 AM
Also, a nice cocktail is: Invisibility + Move Silently + Whispering creepy stuff.

My character did this recently. She whispered something (don't remember what) to an enemy who ran away, frightened. Then, she sneaked over to his confused friend and made it so close that she could whisper in his ear:

"Did you see your frind run, just now? He had a really good reason. Now, do you really want to stay and find out what?"

AstralFire
2009-10-17, 11:43 AM
Ctrl+F Mike Tyson not found.

Proceeding to insert Mike Tyson.

"I could feel his muscle tissues collapse under my force. It's ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm."

Count Dravda
2009-10-26, 02:07 AM
A few more, courtesy of Something Positive...

http://somethingpositive.net/sp07092002.shtml

http://somethingpositive.net/sp02132008.shtml

Graphic one
http://somethingpositive.net/sp12112003.shtml

Oh, and *bump*.

-Count Dravda

Krazddndfreek
2009-10-26, 02:21 AM
I always find a knife to the throat the best for intimidating. After that you can say "You're shoes are untied" and they'll crap bricks. Actions speak louder than words :smallwink:

Myrmex
2009-10-26, 02:29 AM
One of my favorite terrifying lines is from a rather popular computer game; Diablo 2. You've just fought past a horde of terrifying monsters, including three lords of hell, activated five profane seals...and then the hellish temple starts to shake and a red light comes from nowhere. This deep, terrible voice, filled with malice and a lust for death and violence, comes from everywhere and nowhere;

"Not even death cane save you from me."

And the most terrible part of this statement? It's true. This is Diablo; the Lord of Terror; the goddamn king of HELL ITSELF. If you die, here, in his domain, at his claws? You're f----d. Your soul is going straight to him.

A lot of the lines from that game were great. Oh, man, how could I forget?! Tyrael's line, at the end of Act 2!! The Dark Wanderer is stepping forward, about to yank about Baal's soulstone, when this tendril of crackling white energy wraps around his arm, and...

"Stop! The beast contained herein shall not be set free...not even by you."

Ehh, D2 was easymode compared to D1.

I found D1's "AHHHHH, FRESHMEAT" waaaaaaaaaaay more frightening.

Temet Nosce
2009-10-26, 06:38 AM
Ehh, D2 was easymode compared to D1.

I found D1's "AHHHHH, FRESHMEAT" waaaaaaaaaaay more frightening.

Truth. D1 has ambiance in spades, even the village itself is eerie. I also loved the understated aspect, up until you hit the Butcher it was just a series of stone rooms with minor enemies then suddenly you open a door and there's a blood covered fat man in a butchers apron surrounded by wriggling impaled corpses. The Butcher was a classic.

Ernir
2009-10-26, 07:28 AM
Ehh, D2 was easymode compared to D1.

I still have never come as close to pissing myself over a videogame as during that single scene in D2.

Not even death... :smalleek:

AtwasAwamps
2009-10-26, 09:12 AM
I still have never come as close to pissing myself over a videogame as during that single scene in D2.

Not even death... :smalleek:

I still think the end of Chapter 2 was one of the most gut-wrenching moments if you let yourself get into it and didn't know about the expansion yet.

You fight your way through hordes and hordes of enemies, raid egyptian-style tombs, fight those damn lightning bugs and finally slam down your macguffin into the key slot, blow open the hidden chamber, and charge in, ready to do battle with Diablo's brother...

Where instead you're greeted with a giant angry bug, slowed to a crawl, and the massive creature slams into you while bellowing in an evil, horrible voice:

"LOOKING FOR BAAL?"

I was like "WHY AREN'T YOU BAAL? YOU SHOULD BE! OH GOD SUFFERING!"

oxinabox
2009-10-26, 10:20 AM
as a heritic invoker.

Bow Down Before Me Foolish Mortals
Invoke obedeince power: me: SO dm these guys here may take as a free action to prostrate themselves upon the ground before me.
(or that will take damage)

latter,
Run From Me Fools For I am Greater than any God
Emesiry of the gods power:
Intimidate: 38.

This was done to a large mob of villages...

MickJay
2009-10-26, 10:51 AM
"Dinsdale!" :smalltongue:

V:tM game: a captured hunter was threatened by one of the characters that he will either cooperate and receive a swift death, or will be turned into a vampire himself. For the hunter, who was trained to resist pain and who resisted threats of physical pain, the embrace equaled eternal damnation - he divulged the information very quickly.

The point is, find the one thing that the victims cares about the most, or fears the most, and use that to your advantage.

peacenlove
2009-10-26, 11:37 AM
My favorite :smallbiggrin:

You are my food. I will eat you now. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2cI5O5GT6A&feature=related)

(Makes me wanna have an avatar of him also :smallbiggrin: )

Count Dravda
2009-10-26, 02:28 PM
Damn...now I need to play Diablo to see what everyone's talking about.

Jergmo
2009-10-26, 03:07 PM
Damn...now I need to play Diablo to see what everyone's talking about.

"You're too late, hahahahaha!"

"Now my young brother, the time has come to assume your true form! Arise Diablo, Lord of Terror!"

"And the Evil that was once vanquished shall rise anew. Wrapped in the guise of man shall he walk amongst the innocent and Terror shall consume they that dwell upon the Earth. The skies shall rain fire, and the seas will become as blood. The righteous shall fall before the wicked, and all of Creation shall tremble before the burning standards of Hell!"

And to top it off, his voice feels like a thousand needles in your heart!

Talbot
2009-10-26, 05:04 PM
Not from gaming sessions, but...

"I'll find what you're hiding. The tatters of your soul will confess it to me." -Sebastian Faust

"“You know who I am. Or you ought to. You know my reputation… Now, does anyone here really want to start something?” -John Constantine

"When you're slapped you'll take it and like it!" -Sam Spade

KitsuneKionchi
2009-10-26, 05:14 PM
Oblig. "Run cowards. I live!"

--

My shifter partymate once ran up to a halfling innkeeper we were talking to (after an hour and a half of out of character short jokes) and screamed something that everyone in the room simply made out to be:

"FEAR ME!"

We all laughed for 10 minutes straight assuming he was still saying short jokes. Except the DM, who thought he was being a brazened idiot.

Later we found out he was trying to say "beer me". The innkeeper was also the barkeep, as the DM said earlier and only he remembered.

--

"What's your will saving throw again?"

The Gilded Duke
2009-10-27, 12:50 PM
So in a strange level one game I'm running, where I specifically am not using level appropriate encounters, the party used some knockout gas to take out a guard dog and a Half-Orc Barbarian who was on watch.

The Rogue and the Swordsage move in and simotaneously coup de grace the Half-Orc. They do 15 points of damage to it, and force him to make two fort saves vs death.

"He wakes up and roars."

Freaked the entire group out.
They ended up taking him out with a well placed daze followed by everyone hitting him the next round.

A character i'm planning on, a battlefield control illusionist has all sorts of plans for different messages to include in his illusions.

The main one he plans to use with silent image.
Encasing the enemy forces in a series of 10 by 10 by 10 iron cubes, supernaturally dark inside, with the only source of light being a glowing elven script etched in starmetal.

It says "I prepared explosive runes today."

It is up to them if they want to spend a round examining the message to try and disbelieve the illusion.

Sleepingbear
2009-10-27, 01:57 PM
In a game where I was playing a fighter. We had tracked an enemy group of NPC's to their lair. The sorcerer cast greater invisibility on my character. But the rogue forgot to check for traps.

A big stone slab fell on my character's head for 10D6 damage.

He said "Ow," then charged in, clanking loudly, and still invisible.

Kyrthain
2009-10-27, 07:05 PM
In a game where I was playing a fighter. We had tracked an enemy group of NPC's to their lair. The sorcerer cast greater invisibility on my character. But the rogue forgot to check for traps.

A big stone slab fell on my character's head for 10D6 damage.

He said "Ow," then charged in, clanking loudly, and still invisible.

In a similar vein, our party of way powerful ECL 18 gestalt characters walked into a trap that must have cost billions of gp to maintain
(like, 100ftx150ftx60ft room where every 5 foot wall space shoots a poisoned dart with something like deathblade poison on each dart)
The mindflayer favored soul dodges all bolts aimed at him, the kyton assassin does likewise, the fiendish goons we've picked up have enough dr to ignore it, and it almost kills the flayer's cohort.
It does a grand total of 5 damage to my beastly troll. Who then bites his hand off because he's hungry, inflicting more damage on himself than the trap did. :smalltongue:

Would have been very intimidating had there been foes around.:smallfrown:

Count Dravda
2009-10-27, 09:25 PM
Spoilered for Graphic Content. -- From someone very thorough with ranks in heal.

"You want to know something interesting? Each finger has three breakable bones in it. Each toe has another two. That's fifty breakable points. Then, factor in your nose and testicles. There's another three. That gives me a total of fifty three points that I can cause excruciating pain in with this hammer. Now, I'm going to ask you a question for one minute. If you refuse to answer me, I will break one of these bones with this hammer. It will only take a few seconds to do so. I will then ask again for one minute. Then I will break another one. If you manage to resist the entire time, with me smashing every single one of these points with a hammer, congratulations. You've done something no other man has ever done. You'll have earned one hour of reprieve, and then I come back with garden shears and we repeat the process on hard mode.

The next three hours of your life can be the most miserable, or you can tell me what I want right now and be sent back to your cell where no one will touch you. The first minute begins now."

You win, sir.

-Count Dravda