What is the weirdest or most awkward confrontation with a stranger you have ever had?

[Ormagoden]

So let me start one of these then!
Since I think the answers will be fun (because I know mine are!)

What is the weirdest or most awkward confrontation you've ever had with a stranger?

Did someone say something out of the blue?
Did you get hugged for no reason?

The more awkward and funny the better! True stories only please!
(try not to be graphic if it swings in that direction.)

To start us off my own stories! (listed in least awkward to most awkward)

4) After seeing the movie war of the worlds in the theater I went to use the bathroom. I am standing at a urinal taking care of my business when a man with an accent walks up to me (mid-stream) and says "I don't get it?"
I proceed to turn my head rather quickly and say "Get...what?" My tone literally REEKS with a get the hell away from me while I'm peeing vibe.

"The birds...The birds killed the aliens?"

Referring to the final scene where the soldiers rocket the shield-less tri-pod.
Thinking quickly and not wanting to draw the "peeversation" out, I respond. "Yeah, it was the birds."

3) At the same movie theater I went to see Constantine. After the movie I of course payed a trip to the bathroom. While in the bathroom a man dressed in very baggy camouflage shirt and jogging pants seems to linger around me as if to mug or perhaps rape me. As I step out rather alarmed at the points in time he had gotten close to me he speaks up. "So do you believe in that $h#t?" I turn to face the guy and tilt my head quizzically. I had seen him walk into the movie I was watching so I began to give him an answer when he interrupted before I could get a word out. "You know time travel and $h#T?"

Now of course at this point I look very confused...I mean I did just watch Constantine...and...well it wasn't about time travel.

"That $h#t is whacked out man!" he exclaims entirely confused hoping that a nerd could somehow ease his spinning brain.

I simply respond. "Yeah, whacked out...Later" and I walk off.

2) My only story not involving a movie theater (I like the movies!) I one time took a visit to Bush garden's Virgina. Where while waiting on a ride (one I got stuck on for 45 minutes) A young portly fellow hears me and my long time childhood friends talking about world of warcraft. Awkward and young I notice that he seems to want to talk with us about it. I noticed mainly because he was alone and dancing back and fourth at our every word. Eventually he gains the willpower to put himself out there and interjects with "You guys play wow? What server are you on?" We begin a short conversation with the boy. A conversation in which thankfully I lied about what server I played on. Excitedly he interjected and he was nice so we talked with him about something we all loved "gaming". So we all get on the ride, I think it was the griffin or something. The kid gets jammed in the row behind us and we get stuck 30 feet from the end of the ride for 45 minutes. Everyone is staring at us as if it was our fault as they wait salivating for their chance on the coaster.

After we finally get off were walking away from the ride and who is following us? our little friend of course! We walk and he follows, not saying anything. My girlfriend questions me "who's the kid" I say "don't worry he'll go away when he realizes were not talking about wow anymore, don't mention wow honey." So he follows us, we play some games, he follows us, we walk around, he follows us, we stop to eat, he follows us.

Finally when were eating and about to get up to leave I "wave" to the boy and say "see ya later!" My wave was really the international sign for "Stop F#^%ing following us cuz your creeping us out."

1) And of course my final and most awkward moment in history has to be when crouching tiger hidden dragon came out. I was REALLY late on the scene with that movie seeing it the last week it was in theaters after its huge opening. I took my buddy Dave (Who I used to refer to as the super hero "Overreaction man") We sit down and watch the movie. Of course its totally great and we're engrossed. During a particularly dramatic scene someone begins laughing hysterically about 6 rows in front of us. At first Dave is pretty miffed, but he doesn't say anything. It happens again and its louder and he yells "Shut UP!" pretty loudly. The person continues to laugh and it seems like the person next to them is enjoying the comedy of the social interaction waving their arms around. Its quiet for a while and a laugh happens again towards the end of the movie. At this point Dave had been talking for 15 minutes about how he is going to flip if they laugh again. So OFF HE GOES! He yells a string of loud rude curses at the person peppering them with the words SHUT UP quite a few times. The person never really turns around but their are no more laughs for the rest of the film. I am obviously mortified by his yelling and highly embarrassed.

The lights go on, and the couple that seemed to be laughing get up. I see them from the corner of my eye and look as Dave is still ranting about how he wants to see it again this time without idiots laughing the whole way through. As he is venting at me, I turn white. He asks me whats wrong and follows the horrible look in my eyes towards what they are focused on.

Dave had been yelling at a mentally challenged person and their chaperon who had been attempting to calm them down during some scenes where the young boy was obviously entertained by the martial artists flying through the air and fighting.

Dave immediately shuts up realizing what he has done and the female chaperon walks by us shaking her head.

Most awkward moment in MY LIFE!

OK you're next!

[Cobra_Ikari]

Did you get hugged for no reason?

This happened to me once and only once. Apparently, the person who hugged me was actually an escaped radioactive hugmonster, and they gifted me with the power of snuggle. Now I just need to get a costume and fight crime. >.>

[charl]

Well I got death threats from a couple of bikers on a train once for no apparent reason what so ever. That was pretty awkward.

[bosssmiley]

Working in Mickey D's. Weekend night shift. Half-naked (no pants), crap-smeared, staggeringly drunken guy lurches out of the customer toilet and starts chattering away at me like we're bezzy mates inna wurl.

Disgruntled queue builds up behind the guy. He continues to decry the state of the world and ponder what he wants to eat as if he were deciding the fate of the world. How exactly he's going to pay for his food is another matter entirely (no pants, remember?). Huge scene. Threats, cajoling, tears, tantrums, chairs kicked over, stuff thrown, police called.

My so-called workmates? They're all lurking about p***ing themselves with laughter over it. :smallmad:

So, yeah. Awkward.

[Totally Guy]

When I was walking I mistook a group of girls shouting to another group "Guy's stop!" for shouting "Guy Stop!"

My name is Guy.

[Ormagoden]

This happened to me once and only once. Apparently, the person who hugged me was actually an escaped radioactive hugmonster, and they gifted me with the power of snuggle. Now I just need to get a costume and fight crime. >.>

Makes perfect sense!

[BritishBill]

Some guy kept asking me and my cousin for change but we didnt have any. He started following us saying he heard it jingling in our pockets and started getting in our faces. Now my cousin is a police officer and even off duty he carries his gun with him everywhere. He didnt pull it out on the guy or anything but needless to say he got ****ed up.

[Quincunx]

Every post-LARP run to the local greasy spoon, there would be two camps on opposite sides of the diner, in full regalia, at 3 AM: the vampires, and the bikers. I don't care to speculate on which side had pointier teeth.

[Totally Guy]

Every post-LARP run to the local greasy spoon, there would be two camps on opposite sides of the diner, in full regalia, at 3 AM: the vampires, and the bikers. I don't care to speculate on which side had pointier teeth.

Which ones were the LARPers? :smalltongue:

I need to pick up my copy of "Biker: the Revving"... Revvening...

[Silverraptor]

One of the weirdest for me was when I was working on a boyscout camp on an island for the summer. It was about when the troops were getting ready to leave because the week was up, and one of the scoutmasters walked up to me on the trail. He shook my hand and said he was watching all the staff in camp and said I was a great person and would make an excellent father. Then he walked off before I could respond, leaving me standing there feeling peculiar for several minutes.

[onasuma]

Every post-LARP run to the local greasy spoon, there would be two camps on opposite sides of the diner, in full regalia, at 3 AM: the vampires, and the bikers. I don't care to speculate on which side had pointier teeth.

Yeah, generally situations when Im still green from my orc make up. Like that weekend it just wouldnt come off for about 3 days... School was fun...

[Ormagoden]

Yeah, generally situations when Im still green from my orc make up. Like that weekend it just wouldnt come off for about 3 days... School was fun...

Baby wipes.

[Sipex]

My friends and I were sitting in one of the local food courts talking and deciding what we wanted to eat, I'm not entirely sure if we said anything video game related but here's what happened anyways.

A kid, about....13 I'd say slams his hands on our table and asks "Who would win, Mario or Sonic?"

We just stare at him and he asks again.

Then my friend makes the mistake of trying to rationalise it with Brawl and well, it just goes down from there. He asks us multiple combinations and is still asking us as his mother drags him off.

We saw him later and he instantly recognised us so we had to avoid him.

[The Vorpal Tribble]

Well, first one that comes to mind was when I moved to Nashville to help start a music magazine with a friend. I'm with her when the car breaks down in the middle of the night, so we call a mechanic. In the meantime another friend in the area comes over in case we need a ride out. This second friend has brought her young son with her so as not to leave him home alone. Well, 2nd friend waits and after awhile needs to use the restroom. I do as well, so we both drive to a nearby gas station.

She goes in and I stay with the son who is now asleep. In the meantime a guy drives up to a nearby car and starts screaming at the woman within. He hurls his drink at her, then his cell phone, shattering it. The woman is inside crying. Before I can do anything he gets back in his car and roars off. I jump out and see if the woman is ok when friend #2 comes out. I tell her what's going on and she comforts the woman while I go back to stay with the son. Psycho then drives up again and starts running for friend #2, saying to get the hell out of his way. Friend #2 just stands in front of the woman's window, blocking him from getting to the woman in the car.

Psycho rears back to slug her, when I run over and shout to get his attention. The dude spins around and leaps at me, slamming me into the window of the station. I throw him off but he leaps back on... and just latches on. He's apparently so drunk he can barely stand so is just hanging on furiously in a big bear hug and staggering around.

We get tangled up and fall to the ground and finally get the ape off me. He runs away screaming, 'Keep away from women!'

One of the most memorable WTF? meetings of my life.

-=-=-=-=-=-

I also go into strange people's houses and poke into every nook and cranny all day long for a living, so I have such a list I can't even remember them.

Most awkward that sticks though is a flaming gay brazilian guy whose velcro pants popped open because of a... who knows what. His response, 'Oh, the <censored> just doesn't want to stay in the pants!'

[Ormagoden]

We get tangled up and fall to the ground and finally get the ape off me. He runs away screaming, 'Keep away from women!'


HAHAHA Love it!

[Trog]

Hmm... I have two stories.

One was when I was a teenager helping out at my dad's business doing some bartending (back then all you needed was a licensed bartender on staff and you could work in a bar with a parent if you were underage... I think. Mostly I was cleaning though with the occasional ringing up of a sale). Anyway, this guy made a racist remark about blacks. I told him off for doing so since my best friend was black and I though he was being a racist bastard.

He then proceeded to explain that he grew up in Chicago and in a predominantly black neighborhood and had many black friends and that he was often singled out for abuse by the group because he was the one white guy, etc., etc. I still think he was an ass but it was awkward to have to sit there (trapped, as I was, bartending) and listen to his "justification" for his racism.

The other time was running into this Irish guy (heavy accent) who was sunburned to a bright red and had stopped me on a day when the heat index was climbing to 120°F. He was looking for a church of some sort and I pointed him in the direction of the nearest mall to get out of the heat and get help from someone who might have more of a clue than I did where the church was. Then I proceeded to walk home. Neither of us should have been outside.

And then, after having parted ways with the lost Irishman I thought "I should go back and give him this bottled water that I have because he is lost and I know where I'm going and he's going to need it more than me." So I turn around and head back to look for this guy but I never find him anywhere, end up going way out of my way to look for him, finally have to say "screw it" and drink the water myself because now I am overheating and by the time I got home I had sunstroke or heat exhaustion or something. I literally couldn't even think straight for the next day or so. Horrible. Darn mirage Irishman. *grumbles*

Though if I got any brain damage from that... that might explain a lot. :smallconfused: :smalltongue: :smallwink:

[evisiron]

Not awkward, but must have looked weird from the outside :smallbiggrin::

I went to a Dethklok concert wearing my "Cthulhu for President: Why vote for the lesser evil?" T-shirt with my girlfriend. We then proceeded to bump into some guy wearing a "Megatron for President: Why vote for the lesser evil?" T-shirt. I say "Are you kidding me?! Megatron wouldn't know where to start!"
This proceeded into a full blown mini debate, with both of us "storming off". It was a complete piss take of course, but was damn good fun. :smallsmile:

[Totally Guy]

There was one time I was on a bus and a guy sat on the seat in front of me.

He was a dumb American. Not in the idiotic sense but in the sense that he didn't appear to be able to talk.

He complained about the lack of AC on the bus. Visually. Like a mime artist. He nodded as I narrated what I thought he was saying.

Then he went on to explain that he was far from his home land. Visually. He got out a dollar and pointed at the words "United States". He then folded it into a plane and pretended to fly it.

Then I assume that he was trying to tell me that is wasn't as hot as other places he'd been but I was starting to struggle with the lack of words and he'd stopped nodding so much.

That was an odd encounter.

[Thajocoth]

Crazy Hobo (to nearby road cone): "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A CONE IS!"

Crazy Drunk Hobo Woman (on subway): I had headphones on & ignored her. She was attempting to hit on me, telling me, essentially, that I wished to sleep with her, which I did not. Though, her language was far more vulgar. At some point she kicked me. When she got off, some of the other passengers complemented me on my bravery. Really though, I don't see any other options I might've had than standing there pretending my music was too loud to hear her.

Crazy Guy (on subway): Accused me of looking at him, several times. We were in seats that faced one another. I was looking above him at the window (which was fairly boring). He also assumed I must be racist for looking at him.

Staples: A customer looked like the manager's twin and had a similar shirt. I started asking him for help with something I needed. That was just embarrassing.


The other time was running into this Irish guy (heavy accent) who was sunburned to a bright red and had stopped me on a day when the heat index was climbing to 120°F. He was looking for a church of some sort and I pointed him in the direction of the nearest mall to get out of the heat and get help from someone who might have more of a clue than I did where the church was. Then I proceeded to walk home. Neither of us should have been outside.

And then, after having parted ways with the lost Irishman I thought "I should go back and give him this bottled water that I have because he is lost and I know where I'm going and he's going to need it more than me." So I turn around and head back to look for this guy but I never find him anywhere, end up going way out of my way to look for him, finally have to say "screw it" and drink the water myself because now I am overheating and by the time I got home I had sunstroke or heat exhaustion or something. I literally couldn't even think straight for the next day or so. Horrible. Darn mirage Irishman. *grumbles*

Though if I got any brain damage from that... that might explain a lot. :smallconfused: :smalltongue: :smallwink:

Obviously a leprechaun. If you gave him the right directions, you'd have a pot of gold by now.

[Ormagoden]

Crazy Hobo (to nearby road cone): "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A CONE IS!"


I lol'ed that's priceless

[Cobra_Ikari]

Can I list awkward conversations with non-strangers, too? I can't think of any I've had with strangers...since the only strangers I ever really end up talking with are homeless, hungry beggars, and their stories were sad, but didn't make me feel awkward. And I feel awkward when people assume I'm a certain religion and make comments about me assuming this, but that's not really board appropriate. Well...now that I think about it, neither is the conversation I was going to mention. And it'd almost better go in the LGBT thread. Hmm. =\

[charl]

Crazy Drunk Hobo Woman (on subway): I had headphones on & ignored her. She was attempting to hit on me, telling me, essentially, that I wished to sleep with her, which I did not. Though, her language was far more vulgar. At some point she kicked me. When she got off, some of the other passengers complemented me on my bravery. Really though, I don't see any other options I might've had than standing there pretending my music was too loud to hear her.

"Lady, leave me alone. I'm gay." :smalltongue:

[Silverraptor]

My Grandmother just walked into the room and read over my shoulder about this thread and told me to tell you guys about what happened to her. Unfortunately, I had to tell her that it probably isn't allowed because it involves presidential elections.

[Trog]

Obviously a leprechaun. If you gave him the right directions, you'd have a pot of gold by now.
The thought has occurred to me, yes. :smallamused: The real irony being that if I had been given a pot of gold it would have slowed me down enough that I probably wouldn't have made it home alive. So be careful what you wish for and such... or um... never trust leprechauns... or... you know... insert your own moral to the story here.

[Zincorium]

I was on a train going back to Yokosuka from Tokyo at 6AM, and a Japanese man sat down next to me, slumped over, and went to sleep with his head resting on my arm.

Since I was kind of wierded out and didn't feel like waking him up, he slept soundly for the entire hour and a half ride. Pretty sure he was asleep when I slipped my arm out to get off. And I think there's a good chance he missed his stop.

At least I know I'm not a threatening person...

[Lorn]

Well, last Saturday I was out on the town in pirate garb, and some random 30-ish year old chav decided to punch me in the mouth, leading to me spitting blood on the pavement for a good 20-30 minutes. That count?

(Seriously, never seen him before...)

Then there was the time at the Viking re-enactment show at York back at Easter. Another group (as in, not us at all, same period) was joining us on the field. So there's two bits in here. One was when I looked at the guy whose name I didn't even know next to me, with blood pouring out of his mouth, myself in the same state, and we just sort of said "oh, crap - these guys are not pulling their blows." For the rest of the fight we kept an eye on each other's backs, until I got taken down and some of the best combatants in the society took the other group down.
Then when the guy who'd got me in the mouth with my own shield came up to me afterwards. You have no idea how weird it is to have someone come up and say "hey, sorry I got you in the mouth, you alright? Great fight, though - here, try this and this with your axe next time."

And then when I met someone up after LARPing with them. Mostly weird because we'd only ever talked in character before... :p

There's many more, but I'm tired now.

[Winthur]

During a convention, I took a sneak peek into the manga room where a bunch of Japanophiles were drawing.

I was kinda wondering if I could draw at the time, but seeing as how I'm not really capable of even writing clearly, I don't see myself as much of an artist. I'm not motivated hard enough to try.

So I've decided to look over the shoulder of a guy with glasses and long hair. I observed how he was drawing to get some ideas about the subject. Now, I know it's probably rude, but I was - and I still am - rather inept socially.

After a few moments, he notices me, turns his head, looks straight in my eyes for a second... and says: "Meow!".

The most creepy. Thing. Ever. My eyes shot open, I quickly reinforced myself somewhere else and I never again dared to disturb anyone's personal space again like this.

[Thanatos 51-50]

I was on a train going back to Yokosuka from Tokyo at 6AM, and a Japanese man sat down next to me, slumped over, and went to sleep with his head resting on my arm.

Since I was kind of wierded out and didn't feel like waking him up, he slept soundly for the entire hour and a half ride. Pretty sure he was asleep when I slipped my arm out to get off. And I think there's a good chance he missed his stop.

At least I know I'm not a threatening person...

Hour and a half?
Psh, if you take the Tokkaido line to Ofuna and then transfer back onto Yokosuka-Sobu there, that ride is, like, 45 - 50 minuetes, assuming you're departing from Tokyo Station.

[SoD]

I was on a train going back to Yokosuka from Tokyo at 6AM, and a Japanese man sat down next to me, slumped over, and went to sleep with his head resting on my arm.

Since I was kind of wierded out and didn't feel like waking him up, he slept soundly for the entire hour and a half ride. Pretty sure he was asleep when I slipped my arm out to get off. And I think there's a good chance he missed his stop.

At least I know I'm not a threatening person...

Whilst traveling overseas with my family, we went to the zoo, in that place that's about an hour and a half or so south of LA. San Antonio, that's...not it, that's texas. Umm...it'll come back to me. Anyway, on the ride back, there wasn't room for my family and me to all sit together, so I'm sitting next to this relatively attractive young girl (maybe...14? 15? And I was 16 at the time). We chat for a bit (I have no problem speaking with strangers), and it turns out we're both on holidays from Australia. I chose not to hold the fact she was a mainlander against her. I was still getting used to the new time zones, and, after about 15 minutes of happy chatting, I promtly fell asleep. This wasn't a problem. After a few minutes, the bus turned a corner, and I ended up with my head resting on her shoulder. This, again, wasn't that much of a problem, until the bus hit a pothole or something, and bumped around a bit. End result of me sleeping with my head resting in a strangers lap. That was...awkward.

But onto the one I was originally going to post, serving a customer at subway;
Me; Good afternoon, Sir. How are you today?
Man; I'm allright. Yourself?
Me; Yeah, pretty good. As good as it can be stuck in here. Been having a good day?
Man; Yeah. But tommorow won't be a good day. *looks sad*
Me; Oh. How come?
Man; It's my wifes birthday.
Me, thinking he's making a joke; (I actually forget what it was I said, something jokey)
Man; (gives me what can only be described as a look) She died in a car crash a month ago.
Me; .........oh.
Man; .........
Me; (I don't know what made me say this, I just turned onto automatic) Can I interest you in our double dinner deal this evening?

He left the store. I haven't seen him again.

[SurlySeraph]

An unkempt, pale, quite tall man with bloodshot eyes and pupils the size of periods sprinted up to nine-year-old me, screamed "OOGA BOOGA BOOGA!" in my face, and ran away. This was on the street when I was walking home from school, quite independent of any context. I don't think I'll ever forget that.

[Ormagoden]

WOW SOD that one's rough!

[Thanatos 51-50]

Whilst traveling overseas with my family, we went to the zoo, in that place that's about an hour and a half or so south of LA. San Antonio, that's...not it, that's texas. Umm...it'll come back to me. Anyway, on the ride back, there wasn't room for my family and me to all sit together, so I'm sitting next to this relatively attractive young girl (maybe...14? 15? And I was 16 at the time). We chat for a bit (I have no problem speaking with strangers), and it turns out we're both on holidays from Australia. I chose not to hold the fact she was a mainlander against her. I was still getting used to the new time zones, and, after about 15 minutes of happy chatting, I promtly fell asleep. This wasn't a problem. After a few minutes, the bus turned a corner, and I ended up with my head resting on her shoulder. This, again, wasn't that much of a problem, until the bus hit a pothole or something, and bumped around a bit. End result of me sleeping with my head resting in a strangers lap. That was...awkward.

San Diego?

I swear, guys, I'd be participating more, but I'm having trouble remembering anything awkward. This leads to one of the following cocnlusions:
I'm more socially apt than I allow myself to think
I'm extraordinarily unflappable
I've blocked them out from the trauma
I've simply forgotten about them.

[Falgorn]

While on a Mission Trip, a man in El Salvador mistook my sister for...ahem..."One who sells her flesh." A prostitute. The confrontation was not friendly.

[Mr. Mud]

I walked into the grocery store, and I thought I saw my girlfrine,d bending over to get someting on the bottom shelf. Innocent as can be Mr. Mud walks up and hugs her from behind...

It's not my girlfriend. The woman, of about 32 yells for help, thinking I was trying to take advantage of her, and her HUGE husband can running down the aisle, almost tackling me. After explaining what happen, he thrust a fat middle finger in my face, and used rather profane words not suitable for a forums with children... Anyway, crisis was, for the most part, adverted.

Weird, weird place, that grocery store...

[SoD]

San Diego?

That's the one!

[The Vorpal Tribble]

See, SoD, I'm in no way a perv or anything, but that just wouldn't have been awkward for me. Now, if it had been a guy... it would have. That's just me.

[Helanna]

Let's see . . . I'm pretty much awkward around all strangers, but nothing particularly weird has happened . . . except for maybe once . . .

I'd gone to a friend's birthday party, and she had invited some people that I didn't know. So around midnight, about six of us took a walk. The only two guys in the group left to go home partway through, so it's just me, my friend, and a couple girls I didn't know, around midnight. All of a sudden, one goes "Okay, so who here is a virgin?!"

Dead silence. Me and my friend stop walking and just look at her, and just tell her that it's none of her business. So she points at my friend and says "I know that you are", and then she points at me and goes "Hmm . . . you might not be." I still have no idea whether that's a compliment, or an insult, or what. :smallconfused:

Her next question was "What's the weirdest question you've ever been asked?" Needless to say, all our answers were the same . . .

[Cobra_Ikari]

Let's see . . . I'm pretty much awkward around all strangers, but nothing particularly weird has happened . . . except for maybe once . . .

I'd gone to a friend's birthday party, and she had invited some people that I didn't know. So around midnight, about six of us took a walk. The only two guys in the group left to go home partway through, so it's just me, my friend, and a couple girls I didn't know, around midnight. All of a sudden, one goes "Okay, so who here is a virgin?!"

Dead silence. Me and my friend stop walking and just look at her, and just tell her that it's none of her business. So she points at my friend and says "I know that you are", and then she points at me and goes "Hmm . . . you might not be." I still have no idea whether that's a compliment, or an insult, or what. :smallconfused:

Her next question was "What's the weirdest question you've ever been asked?" Needless to say, all our answers were the same . . .

Yay, being reminded of something!

I got dragged out of an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting by a girl I barely knew and 4 other girls she knew. I was 18, they ranged from 16-23 or so. And then one of them started this conversation. >.>

And by the end of the day, we were all friends!

This goes to show that Cobra can be cuddly in any situation. And has weird friends. >.>

EDIT: Death Dragon? This type of girl was probably saying you are neither overtly prudish, overtly slutty, or extremely ugly. I suppose there's a compliment in there?

[Toastkart]

This was neither weird nor awkward, but I think this thread needs a little uplifting.

I've worked retail for almost seven years while going to college. For the first six years I was at one store. One of our regular customers is an older lady who I would guess is in her early sixties. She also has no arms below the elbow. And yet I've watched her shop with minimal help. I've watched her picking up a basket of items and putting it on my counter to ring out. I've watched her sling her purse off her shoulder, open it, open her wallet, and extract a single twenty dollar bill to pay. She usually asked me to put her change in her bag, which I would then hand to her and she would take and put into her cart. Then she'd close her purse and sling it back up onto her shoulder. She'd thank me and then leave with her friend, who I assumed drove her to the store.

I never did learn her name the whole time I was there, but she'd come in once every four to six months.

[EleventhHour]

One day at 11's Highschool ;

The teacher told me that there was a note, for me to see the guidance counciller after class. Off I go of course! (I've never gone into that room, or met that counciller before, as an aside.)

GC : "Hi!"
EH : "You wanted to see me?"
GC : "Oh, yes. [name here], just take a seat."
EH : *sits*
GC : *finishes doing whatever on her computer*
GC : "So, why are you feeling suicidal?"
EH : :smalleek::smallconfused:
*two akward minutes later*
EH : "I'm feeling suicidal?"

From there it was just the basic "There's other options, you don't need to feel like that, we're here to help." I still have no idea where that came from.

[Dogmantra]

I was at an interview with my to-be housemaster for the school I moved to a couple of years ago. My parents were there. He introduced himself as Mike Schofield... that may have been a mistake, because my dad said "I won't ask the obvious then."
"No, go ahead, I like obvious questions."
"Did you escape?"
My mother, myself and Mr. Schofield all looked at him.

Turns out that the main character in Prison Break is called Mike Schofield... not one of the other three in the room knew this. It wouldn't have been bad if it had been at the end of the interview, but nope, first thing my dad ever said to him.

Needless to say, we don't let my father talk to strangers any more. Not even if they have some puppies in their van.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Not really with strangers, but one day night during this summer I walked in on 17 different makeout sessions in less than two hours.

It's a running gag with me. Another example: In April I was talking to my friend, who was flirting with a guy. I answer a question my brother asks, I turn around after answering it, and BAM! Right behind me they're making out in my face. 30 seconds! I turned around for 30 seconds! God, can't I get a break?!

[RandomNPC]

One day at 11's Highschool ;

GC : "Hi!"
EH : "You wanted to see me?"
GC : "Oh, yes. [name here], just take a seat."
EH : *sits*
GC : *finishes doing whatever on her computer*
GC : "So, why are you feeling suicidal?"
EH : :smalleek::smallconfused:
*two akward minutes later*
EH : "I'm feeling suicidal?"


I've got a friend who's had the same discussion, turns out someone claimed they thought he may be thinking about it, and they take other peoples opinions of how you may be very seriously.

[ninjalemur]

Stranger (man, mid-thirties): Hi
Me: Hi.....?
Stranger: What are you doing tonight?
Me: uh...what
Stranger: Is Dave going to be their?
Me: Who?

I then notice the bluetooth earpiece in his ear.

[Stormthorn]

After a few moments, he notices me, turns his head, looks straight in my eyes for a second... and says: "Meow!".

The most creepy. Thing. Ever. My eyes shot open, I quickly reinforced myself somewhere else and I never again dared to disturb anyone's personal space again like this.

I meow at people sometimes. Although it wasnt me you saw since i dont go out to cons or draw manga or anything.

In general i cause these moments rather than be targeted by them.

[Ormagoden]

One day at 11's Highschool ;

The teacher told me that there was a note, for me to see the guidance counciller after class. Off I go of course! (I've never gone into that room, or met that counciller before, as an aside.)

GC : "Hi!"
EH : "You wanted to see me?"
GC : "Oh, yes. [name here], just take a seat."
EH : *sits*
GC : *finishes doing whatever on her computer*
GC : "So, why are you feeling suicidal?"
EH : :smalleek::smallconfused:
*two akward minutes later*
EH : "I'm feeling suicidal?"

From there it was just the basic "There's other options, you don't need to feel like that, we're here to help." I still have no idea where that came from.

Someone obviously didn't like you and set you up... We might have went to the same highschool...and that might have been me...

[Thanatos 51-50]

I work in a secured space. Not everyone I work with is autorised to be in this space.
Earlier today I got a knock on the door, and was met with somebody not authorised to see/be inside the space. He happens to outrank me and also just happened to ask for my supervisor.
I give him a quick "Okay, on, stand by" and let go of the door, expecting it to close like usual.
It catches on his boot.

So I, being the dutiful worker concerned with secuirty reach over and tug the door shut passed his boot-door-stop and ensure it closes, and bring him my supervisor as asked.

Not-allowed guy hands my supervisor the packages he could have easily asked me to carry, and then proceeds to pull my supervisor and myself outside (To where we're all allowed) and proceeds to grill me for disrespect.

Seriously? What?

[Ormagoden]

I work in a secured space. Not everyone I work with is autorised to be in this space.
Earlier today I got a knock on the door, and was met with somebody not authorised to see/be inside the space. He happens to outrank me and also just happened to ask for my supervisor.
I give him a quick "Okay, on, stand by" and let go of the door, expecting it to close like usual.
It catches on his boot.

So I, being the dutiful worker concerned with secuirty reach over and tug the door shut passed his boot-door-stop and ensure it closes, and bring him my supervisor as asked.

Not-allowed guy hands my supervisor the packages he could have easily asked me to carry, and then proceeds to pull my supervisor and myself outside (To where we're all allowed) and proceeds to grill me for disrespect.

Seriously? What?

"I was just following procedure, I didn't see your shoe there. I thought it got jammed. I'm really sorry about that." Move hand slowly behind head to show embarrassment. Crisis averted!

[Thanatos 51-50]

"I was just following procedure, I didn't see your shoe there. I thought it got jammed. I'm really sorry about that." Move hand slowly behind head to show embarrassment. Crisis averted!

Actual encounter was more like me standing there wearing a very confused look and saying "But - I have to close the door, I can't just leave it open."
"No, it's not about that, it's about the look you gave me."
"Look? I'm sorry? I gave a look?" as my expression grows quickly more confused.
Eventually, my supervisior indicated me to just say "Roger that" so he'll go away.

I swear I heard the words "Report chit" as we walked back inside the space...

[littlequietguy]

This one. Get it?

[xPANCAKEx]

a few years ago when i was visiting some friends in birmingham, we were walking down a street, middle of the afternoon, on a weekday and a woman approaches us

her: "excuse me, can i talk to you for a few..."
my friend (interupting): "no, you're a cult"

and we walk on leaving her there

about 50 meters down the road
me: "so what was all that about"
him: "f*ckin scientologiest mans... they're all over this city"

very odd

[Anuan]

My last flight (at the end of the worst trip ever v-v), I was sitting at a flight gate...the one -next- to the one I was meant to be in, but that was because it was mostly empty and I still had a half-hour to wait.

This guy on the other side of the room breaks his conversation, points at me and goes "LOOK AT THIS GUY! LOOK AT HIS HAIR, HE'S A ROCKER!"

He then comes over and starts ranting and asking me if I listen to various old metal bands I've never heard of (I don't really listen to metal much) and asking me about school and stuff. He tells me he dropped out in tenth grade like it would surprise me; the guy reeked of alcohol, was wearing stubby-shorts, a singlet and thongs (flipflops, if y'want) and had the scruffiest stubble I've ever seen. He was happy though, apparently, so good for him.

Not really that awkward, but at the abbey tournament I was holding the head of a spear-style polearm (can't remember the name off the top of my head) and saying to Felix it could practically be used as a dagger it was so long. One of the stall-owners didn't hear me properly and started correcting me. I just nodded because I'm too socially awkward to say "I know, you misheard me."

[Lycan 01]

Ugh... Too many to list, although most of them probably wouldn't be allowed on here. However, this one is just priceless...


So my mom has been in jail for about a month, and my dad just got out. Me and my dad finish our therapy session, and head to the mall while my brother has his meeting with the psychologist. (No, I'm not making this crap up. 2007 was a fun year...) Me and my dad realize its almost time to pick up my bro, so we finish buying a cd at Hot Topic and then book it for the parking lot. But along the way, we get accosted by this Egyptian dude and his buddy selling perfume. The conversation goes like this:

Dude: Excuse me, sir!
Dad: *ignores him*
Dude: Sir, one moment, please!
Dad: I'm afraid I can't talk right now...
Dude: But, sir-
Me: Sorry dude, we're in a hurry...
Dude: Please, I only have one question. It will only take one moment!
Dad: *sighs* Okay, fine. What is it?
Dude: *big grin* Is there a special woman in your life, sir?
Me: *knows what is about to happen. Feels sorry for the guy*
Dad: *smirks mischeviously* Yep. She's in prison!
Dude: :smalleek:
Dude 2: *from behind the cart, without missing a beat* You can buy some perfume, and send it to her! :smallbiggrin:
Dad: Nope, I don't even have visitation rights...
Dude: *IIRC, he made some sort of whimper noise*
Dad: Now if you'll excuse me, I must be going now.
Dude 2: Have a nice day! :smallbiggrin:
Dude: :smalleek:
Me, out of earshot: I think you ruined that guy's day...
Dad: *laughs*


As we walked away, I looked back, and the dude looked utterly crushed and depressed. I felt kinda sad for him... He didn't know what he was getting himself into...

[Rutskarn]

I went to get my hair cut recently. Sitting across from me was a middle-aged man with his head wrapped in tinfoil, apparently waiting for some voodoo concoction of lotions and gels to take hold.

He points at me, and asks, "I know you! I've seen you at the skate park, right, man?"

It's worth noting that I have never been within 50 feet of anyone riding a 'board. I have an aversion to direct sunlight, exercise, and broken bones--in short, an aversion to the cocktail of misery this man dubs a "skate park".

I politely respond in the negative. This derails him only briefly.

He points to my OOTS "Minions" shirt, saying, "Oh, right, I know what that is. It's insert nonsense jargon word here! I know what that's all about."

I sort of smile and nod. I have no idea what this man is talking about, and I'm reasonably certain he doesn't either. The obvious thing to do would be to (as un-awkwardly as possible) tell him what's actually on the shirt...but do I really want to do that? On the one hand, it's usually hard to shut me up about this sort of thing. On the other, explaining this to him would require, you know, explaining this to him. That's another few minutes of conversation I'm not getting back in a hurry. So I try to cut the conversation short by saying it's "from a comic."

He asks me to explain it to him.

Dammit.

I try to use small words, making sure my description is as brief as possible to avoid a segue into yet another pointless topic. Words like, "parody" and "some game." He persists, asking for even more nested explanations. Finally, when I'm forced to use the words "Dungeons and Dragons," I see his eyes light up with glee.

He grins widely, the grin of a monkey who's stolen the secret of fire from the gods. This was it. This was his moment to show once and for all that he was "hip" to the "lingo". This was his opportunity to demonstrate that he wasn't a doddering, obsolete has-been who's confused by the culture of young people, who has his pulse on the bleeding edge of the mixed metaphors of modern life.

"Right!" he declares triumphantly. "It's a hacker thing."

Now, okay, let me get something straight. Once, while standing on stage in front of hundreds of people, I paused the activity we were engaged in just to refute another participant, who had made a joke about being a level 10 "dungeon master." I shout at the TV when The Big Bang Theory makes a tiny mistake about RPG rules. In a two-week period, I gathered 6 people who have never played an RPG before in their life and roped them into a campaign together. There are few things I like more than informing someone about the hobby, and there are few things I hate more than spreading misconceptions about it.

"Yeah, okay," I replied.

Luckily, at that point, he was called away. I never saw him again.

[Yarram]

It was the interval of a band called Mnozil Brass (A world class, 7 piece brass band from Sweden) and me, a younger friend and his even younger brother were leaning back on a wall talking about how great it was, when this random kid, about 16 walks past, (We think he was drunk) fiercely booting a witches hat in front of him.
I felt the urge to make the witty remark, "I'm a man and I'm angry." To which I expected only my private audience to hear. The awkward came when the kid kicking the hat heard, and was all like, "Aw you think you're smart hey!" while he was walking.
He looked like he was in a hurry. Too much of a hurry to turn around and attack me, and I felt secure, being in a larger group, and being bigger than him, so I smirked and shrugged my shoulders at him before he grunted threateningly one more time then walked away.
The rest wasn't awkward, but it was funny;
A couple of seconds later, someone who we assume knew him came past (Who saw him from behind) and commented, "He thinks he's tough hey?"
This was funny at the time, but what made us laugh even harder in hindsight was that this person had a broken wrist.
A little while later, I casually fetched the witches hat from the garden it was now deposited in, and placed it in the middle of the pathway, so the organisation who put it there could see it. (We didn't know where it came from) And then, even later, the same angry drunk kid came back!
To keep the meagre shreds of dignity he had left, he was forced to make more threatening remarks, to which I quailed at dramatically...
He walked past the witches hat without kicking it.
Needless to say, our joke since then has always been, "GRAH! I'm so MAD I could KICK A WITCHES HAT!" and variances on.

I'm usually the instigator of awkward moments, or at least moments when other people feel awkward, but I don't. Adopting people for example.
"Hey you! You don't look like you have friends! Come hang with us for the day." (This only happens when I spot someone at a group function that I'm attending who seems to be alone)
Or, I've been known to pick a group... Usually the group that is either loudest, or most eccentric and go, "Hey! I'm hanging out with you guys today." And then doing so.

EDIT:
I remembered a situation where I made it really awkward for someone else for a little while.
There was a french horn player, part of a band called SWO that came through our regional band camp, who when he came through, said cockily that we must all be bogans because we're from the country... Something along those lines anyway.
Anyway, when we met again at state band, he was alone, and 4 of us from our region were there (Specifically the ones who he said must be bogans too)
When we first ran into him I said, "Heeeeeeeyyy! You're that guy who called us Bogans at regional band camp!"
Win.
And then he hung with our group for the rest of State. We're nice like that.

[skywalker]

Stranger (man, mid-thirties): Hi
Me: Hi.....?
Stranger: What are you doing tonight?
Me: uh...what
Stranger: Is Dave going to be their?
Me: Who?

I then notice the bluetooth earpiece in his ear.

Oh I got a good one!

I was depressed at the time. It was a little over a year ago, and the girl I was seeing at the time was resisting my advances toward exclusivity. She was doing something that Friday night, and I went to Borders to find something to read. I had about 3 books in my possession, and was looking for a place to sit down. There was a seat open next to a middle-aged man, but it had a few magazines in it. I thought it polite to ask if it was open. The conversation proceeded like this:
Me: Is this seat taken?
Him: No.
Me: *Sits down and begins reading the Silmarillion.*
*5 minutes pass*
Him: So how you doing tonight?
Me: Oh, fine. Yourself?
Him: Great, really great...
*5 more minutes. I am pointedly ignoring him because I can feel eyes on me*
Him: So... What you getting into tonight?
Me: Oh, you know, probably just going to take my books home and read...
Him: Oh, that's great, that's great... So what do you usually get into?
Me: Uh... I hang out with friends... Tonight I'm just going to stay in and read, tho.
Him: Oh, I see... I was just wondering tonight, what you were getting into tonight...
*Borders announces that they are closing in 30 minutes*
Me: Well, they want us to make our final purchases, so I think I'll do that. Bye.
*He follows me out of the store without buying any of the books he had had with him*
Him: Yeah, I was just wondering what you were getting into tonight... tonight... *trails off as I jump in car and drive away*

I had plenty of awkward moments working at the video store. Our no-returns policy was awesome. A man bought "The Shawshank Redemption," then determined it was inappropriate for his children and thus, he must return it. This was despite our clearly displayed "no cash refunds" policy. The conversation was as such:

*Man walks in with his son*
Me: Can I help you?
Him: Yes, I need to return this movie.
Me: Is it damaged?
Him: No, but it's inappropriate for children.
Me: I see. Well, I'm sorry to say I can't give you anything for it unless it's damaged. Even if it were damaged, I could only give you another copy of the same movie.
Him: But it's not appropriate for children.
Me: That doesn't change the fact that I can't give you a refund.
Him: Can I speak to the manager?
Me: You're speaking to him.
Him: Who else can I speak to?
Me: There's a store owner, but he's going to tell you the same thing. And then he's going to yell at me for calling him.
Him: And the store owner thinks this movie is appropriate for children? Does he have children?
(note that the store owner is my dad, I'm pretty sure he has kids.)
Me: He has children, and no, he probably would not think that's appropriate, no.
Him: So why can I not have a refund?
Me: Because we don't give cash refunds. We can only do same-title exchanges for damaged products.
His son pipes up: Papa, he says they can only give anything if it's damaged.
Him: It has to be damaged?
Me: Even that won't help you get a new movie.
*He tears the cassette apart, shouting "There, it's damaged!" and storms out*

I did, in fact, clean up his mess for him. I'm a nice guy.

[Felixaar]

A man once came up to me in the parking lot and said, "You're not quite six feet. I reckon you're about five-ten," and then walked off.

So, now, when people ask me how tall I am, thats what I go by.

[Thajocoth]

I was judging a video game programming contest at the university I graduated from like I do every year, and I was talking to most of the other judges. One of the judges worked on cell-phone "games", but he wasn't in the immediate circle so I thought it fine to express my actual opinion of cell phone "games" as "part" of the game industry when the topic came up in the conversation. The rest of the group seemed to agree. Then I notice the other judge is, like, 2 feet away, looking directly at the group... I heard though that he would up quitting his job for something in the game industry within the year though, so, while initially awkward, maybe it was helpful for him in the long run.

[Serpentine]

Skywalker, that story belongs here (http://notalwaysright.com/). It's just right...


There was a guy who was a regular at my (town) library, where I work. He did Thai massage, and was pretty friendly - a bit too friendly sometimes. Like when he suggested in the same breath he mentioned that his wife was away that I should come to his place to get a massage and use his spa - apparently it makes the massages work better - and if I brought a friend I'd get mine for free. I don't think he meant "anything" by it, but... yeah.
Anyway, that's all pretty irrelevant to this story. Basically, he was a regular at my library. I went to visit my dad at the Gold Coast, changing buses at Brisbane - another state and about 10 hours by bus away. I had to run to catch my bus, cuz I was running late, but as I was doing so, I passed this guy. Being late, I couldn't stop to ask what he was doing there, so we passed each other with a surprised "hi!" and a confused look.
I haven't seen him since, so I assume he was moving up there or something... Odd coincidence.

[EleventhHour]

Um... I have a new akward moment from last night. :smallconfused:

I'm on the street behind a Giant Tiger, on my way back to the Games Shop that I left the car in from of, when two guys try to get my attention. One was fairly tall, and was looking a bit embarressed, and the other guy had a scruffy grey beard, and enough facial hair that I couldn't really make out his mouth. (He looked like one of those silly dolls...) And for some reason, probably because the beard-guy was drunk, they decided to ask me a rather odd question. "Do you know where the strip club is?" Now, I was going to point randomly, since I have no idea anyway, but I decided it would be easier to anwser, "Nope."

I walked pasted them and when I was almost out of earshot, I heard "I thought she worked there?" Now, I don't know if they were having a conversation and that was the one line I caught but...

>.>

[GallóglachMaxim]

And for some reason, probably because the beard-guy was drunk, they decided to ask me a rather odd question. "Do you know where the strip club is?"

I had a group of Russian guys ask me that while I was at work last year, I pointed them towards the seedier end of town.

But the real entry for this thread went like this - I was talking to a friend at a train station (where he was working at the time), and this man came up to us and says 'Can I shake your hand?', we of course ask '...why?' and he tells us that he had just finished of a twenty year prison sentence for murdering two men who had raped his niece, and was making a fresh start by shaking hands with everyone that he saw that day. So we said sure, and when he moved on, both of us made this face (0.o).

[Ormagoden]

I'm really glad this thread got started! There is nothing that makes me laugh harder than awkward moments! Keep'em up!

Another gem I forgot in my initial tales for your enjoyment below.

I'm not sure where it ranks on the list but, here it goes.

Once when I was quite young I visited a place called Great adventure (an amusement park here in the states.) I was pushing my little brother in his stroller after just taking a visit to one of the gift shops there.

Where in my parents purchased a toy for him, It was a kind of plastic stick with a shark head on the end of it. On the grip of the stick was a trigger where if you pulled it the sharks head would snap open and closed.

This toy gave my brother endless enjoyment for the entire day. He would look at it and go "chomp chomp chomp" as gnash his teeth and pull the trigger. Everyone thought it was really cute, and honestly it was!

So I'm pushing my little brother in the stroller and he is chomping away. Being young myself I suddenly became enamored with the colors of one of the "big boy" rides I couldn't go on at the time. I paused the stroller just in front of a another family. In the corner of my eye I see my little bro and I hear him going "chomp chomp..." Then his words are cut off by the high pitched screaming of a grossly overweight fellow who was about 6' 5" (a giant to me at the time) who jumped about 10 feet in the air when my brother, from behind mind you, put the little sharks head in the mans crotch. I can only imagine what it was like to look down between your legs seeing a small shark gnashing its teeth and hearing "chomp chomp"

Never laughed so hard in my life! Needless to say that was AWKWARD! Luckily the mans family thought it was HILARIOUS too so about 15 or so people were all having a good laugh along with my brother who just kept pulling the trigger the whole time he was laughing.

[Quincunx]

So "New Jersey: Where the weak are killed and eaten" has been upgraded to "New Jersey: Beware of landsharks"?

[varthalon]

Walking through a park in Washington, DC...

A average build white guy wearing a filthy surplus camouflage jacket and about a weeks growth of beard (under all the grim) jumped out from behind a cement wall and pulls a knife on me, demanding all my money.

Its my first time really being mugged and I'm fumbling around my pockets trying to figure out what to do starting to panic.

A HUGE black guy (I mean well over 6ft tall and built like a professional boxer) comes jogging around the corner, takes one look at the situation and immediately beats the holy living h@!! out of the mugger - broken nose, kicking him repeatedly when he's curled up on the ground crying in the fetal position, etc - then he just kind of looks me over for a moment and jogs away.

Never even said anything to me

[Ormagoden]

So "New Jersey: Where the weak are killed and eaten" has been upgraded to "New Jersey: Beware of landsharks"?

<insert jaws theme and jersey girl hair>

Right on the money with where I live on that one :D


Chomp chomp chomp

[Myshlaevsky]

Wierdest for me has either been when we met a street magician who was tripping on acid at about 8 in the morning (he proceeded to do tricks and impromptu hypnosis on us), or when a random (junkie) stranger joined in a conversation where we were teasing one of our friends. Said friend ended up pinned by the stranger with a knife at his throat. Thankfully, no-one was hurt. Both of those incidents were very strange.

[Dirk Kris]

I used to visit my grandparents every summer and live there for 3 months, basically. When I got to be about 13 or so, I would have not only friends I met up with, but some girls as well. One summer, I dated this AWESOME chick. We were both junior lifeguards (in the kiddie pools, basically) at a water park, and had spent the whole summer together the year before. When I came back the next summer, the first thing I did was go to the water park. Heading over towards the kids area, I saw her long brown hair, the same swimsuit, her nails were painted red like she liked...it had to be her. Excited, I ran up, grabbed her by the shoulder, spun her around and kissed her. Because I'm smooth like that. Only to find that it was NOT her, and she was NOT excited to be smooched by a stranger.

Yeah...because I'm smooth like that.

[Tiger Duck]

Very smooth indeed.:smallbiggrin:

[Silverraptor]

I used to visit my grandparents every summer and live there for 3 months, basically. When I got to be about 13 or so, I would have not only friends I met up with, but some girls as well. One summer, I dated this AWESOME chick. We were both junior lifeguards (in the kiddie pools, basically) at a water park, and had spent the whole summer together the year before. When I came back the next summer, the first thing I did was go to the water park. Heading over towards the kids area, I saw her long brown hair, the same swimsuit, her nails were painted red like she liked...it had to be her. Excited, I ran up, grabbed her by the shoulder, spun her around and kissed her. Because I'm smooth like that. Only to find that it was NOT her, and she was NOT excited to be smooched by a stranger.

Yeah...because I'm smooth like that.

OMG, Dirk, that brought up a memory that I have long since though I had forgotten.

I was 5 in kindergarden and there was a school wide open house night. Suffice to say, all the parents brought their kids when it was getting dark and explored the school and the classrooms.

I get separated from my dad because of something and I look around desperate to find him. I finally see a guys who looks just like him talking to a couple of other adults. I assumed that was him and just ran up and hugged the guy around the leg saying "Hi".

I heard, "Well, hello there." In a different tone of voice then my father. I look up and see it's not him, back up slowly, then turn to go and find my real dad.

It was a scariest situation of my young life.

[Ormagoden]

OMG, Dirk, that brought up a memory that I have long since though I had forgotten.

I was 5 in kindergarden and there was a school wide open house night. Suffice to say, all the parents brought their kids when it was getting dark and explored the school and the classrooms.

I get separated from my dad because of something and I look around desperate to find him. I finally see a guys who looks just like him talking to a couple of other adults. I assumed that was him and just ran up and hugged the guy around the leg saying "Hi".

I heard, "Well, hello there." In a different tone of voice then my father. I look up and see it's not him, back up slowly, then turn to go and find my real dad.

It was a scariest situation of my young life.


To diverge from the thread a moment...(because you reminded me of this)

I was in my dad's arms once while he was online at a hotel in vegas. A man there on the VIP line was teasing me with a 100$ bill waving it by my face. I'm told (because I don't remember) that I stared at the man for a moment and stunned him with my look and snatched the bill from his hand with a mad cackle. My father calls me Damien whenever he recalls that tale.


Now back on track! Chooo chooooooo!

[skywalker]

Skywalker, that story belongs here (http://notalwaysright.com/). It's just right...

You know, I never thought that site was funny until just now. A different frame of mind, I guess? I'm generally Mr. Customer Service, but I guess on that one day... It was a Sunday, just after Church (you could tell this guy had just come from Church), and I guess I just wasn't to be trifled with that day. Ordinarily it's more of a "Well, you see we have this policy *taps sign* and I'm not supposed to let you have anything but the same movie, but I'll see what we can do to make you happy."

I don't know what came over me that day.

In regards to your massage story, my other funny video store tale is that a man used to come in who was rather odd. Now, we got a lot of odd customers, because we had been in business 25 years (longer than I'd be alive). When dad announced the store was closing, people threatened to go to the mayor and force us to stay in business because we were "a city treasure" or something like that.

ANYWAY, this guy started coming in, I'll never forget the first time our store had contact with him. I was brand new, and the manager at the time answered the phone: "Insert store greeting here], how can I help you? Uh huh. Uh huh... Let me check... Yes sir, we do have it in stock. Uh huh... Um... *gives me confused look, bangs head against the office doorframe. Hefts the tape in his hand* It feels like a normal movie, sir... Uh huh. *Head bang* Yes sir. We'll hold it for you. *hangs up, stares at me* He asked me 'How long does it feel?" Turns out, he had a serious distaste for a certain company, who would record movies in the LP mode of a video tape (instead of SP mode, which is higher quality). He needed help finding his movies. He couldn't read very well, apparently. So of course, I got nominated to help him out. I must have spent 2 hours walking through the rows of videos with him. Every movie had to be at least 90 minutes, or he wouldn't watch it. I had to read the back of every box to see whether a potential purchase was 90 minutes or more. Whenever he bought a movie, he had to cut open the shrink wrap to insure that the tape inside was of high quality. For every. single. tape. But the real awkward moments were when, every 2 minutes or so, he'd look at me and say "Young'un, I've already got that movie. I've got over 800 movies. You need to come over to my house and see 'em all." "Young'un, you need to come over to my house. I've got the poster from that movie right there... Do you like Star Wars? I've got a lot of Star Wars stuff at my house, you need to come over and see it young'un..."


Its my first time really being mugged and I'm fumbling around my pockets trying to figure out what to do starting to panic.

I'm sorry, I have this image of you looking at the mugger and saying "I'm sorry, this is my first time being mugged. Could you cut me some slack, please?" In a really sweet voice.

[Ormagoden]

A friend of mine has a REALLY great story about getting mugged.

Right after he was practicing with live steel at his buddies house...he was walking home with a long sword under his long coat.

Silly muggers.


BTW I have a story for everything...In case some of you haven't guessed that by now.

[varthalon]

I heard, "Well, hello there." In a different tone of voice then my father. I look up and see it's not him, back up slowly, then turn to go and find my real dad.

LOL... reminds me of Universal Studios... I'm not sure if they still do it but I went years ago and they had a guy dressed like Charlie Chaplin who would stroll around and find couples walking along holding hands... husband/wife, boyfriend/girlfriend, mother/child, father/child... didn't matter.

Sneaking up behind them he would get one of them to notice him and then with non-verbal communication would get them to casually let go of their companion's hand and hang back just a bit and he would smoothing step in and take there place, taking hold of the other person's hand.

You'd end up with somebody walking around holding hands with Charlie Chaplin and not realizing it, with their companion following along behind them. It was amazing how long it took for some of them to realize they weren't holding hands with who they thought they were and their reactions when they figured it out.

[Lycan 01]

I have soft hands. Like... really soft hands. People will often comment on this when we shake hands. My friends are mesmerized by this, and will actually touch, shake, or even caress my hands sometimes, just to feel the softness. Awkward, right?


So I'm in Louisiana with my roommate, and we're at his friend's house. I don't know anyone there - and suddenly the friend's little brother, who's about 10, randomly walks up and grabs my hand and begins to rub it. I look down at him in confusion, and he simply says: "I want to feel your hands."

I recoiled in horror, especially since no one had told the kid about my eerily soft hands. Quite awkward... :smallconfused:



There was also the time some guy was stalking my friend at a local church. Every week, me and my friends went to the Wednesday youth service. Well, some creepy guy - bald, sunken eyes, black hoodie - would always follow my friend around. If she went to a different room, he'd somehow be there a few minutes later. He'd randomly try to strike up conversations with her. And he stared at her. A lot. Her boyfriend didn't know what to do, since he couldn't go to security without hard evidence, and he didn't know what to say to the guy. So he just stayed with her at all times, to make her feel safer. But she still felt uncomfortable, and the guy was still creepy. Finally, I offered to take care of him, since I can be very diplomatic and charismatic when I need to be.

Man, I wish I'd kept my mouth shut...

We're standing in the game room at the church, just chillin' out. We suddenly notice the creepy guy standing in the hallway outside, staring through the doorway at our friend. Her boyfriend, IIRC, said he was going to go deal with him, but I said I'd go have a word with him, since I could probably handle it a whole lot better.

Oh... O-ho-ho-hoooo...

Me: *walks into hallway*
Guy: *tries to walk away*
Me: Hey! Excuse me! I need to have a word with you...
Guy: Huh?
Me: I need to talk to you about something. You're making my friend very uncomfortable. You're always following her around, and you're always staring at her. We've seen you do it.
Guy: Oh, I know. I'm just trying to protect her.
Me: Um... What? :smallconfused:
Guy: Yeah, I'm trying to make sure she's safe.
Me: Safe? Safe from what?
Guy: The Black Dragon Gang.
Me: :smallconfused:
Guy: I'm part of the Blue Dragon Clan. I've been tasked with protecting this building, and the people in it. (some other guy who goes to the church) is my superior.
Me: Uh huh... :smallconfused:
Guy: My orders are to watch for suspicious activity, and make sure everyone here is protected.
Me: Right, well, I'm sure my friend isn't a member of the Black Dragon Gang, and she's very well protected by her boyfriend. So you don't have to worry about her anymore, okay? :smallamused:
Guy: Alrighty then, thats good to know. I'm sorry if I made her uncomfortable...
Me: Its okay... *wants to leave now*
Guy: Do you know anybody in the Black Dragon Gang?
Me: Uh... no.
Guy: Well, if you see any suspicious people, or hear anything about the Black Dragon Gang, tell me or (other guy) about it. We've been trained to deal with them. Our Blue Dragon Clan training has given us powerful abilities and skills, like this!
*the guy then proceeds to show off his awesome reflexes... by almost punching me in the face. His open palm stopped against my nose, which is probably not what he'd intended.*
Me: :smalleek::smallconfused::smallmad:
Guy: :smalleek:
Me: Right... Don't touch me. :smallannoyed:
Guy: Sorry... I didn't mean to do that.
Me: I'm sure you didn't. Now if you'll excuse me, I really must be going.
Guy: Okay. And tell your friend I'm sorry for that misunderstanding...
Me: Will do...

We went our seperate ways. I went back to the game room, where all my friends were waiting. The moment I walked in, they all looked at me with horrified expressions. Finally, they asked how it went, since they hadn't actually watched the exchange. I told them them the guy wasn't going to be a problem anymore... and then I told them everything that happened. Afterwards, we all basically had this reaction: :eek:


The guy did leave her alone, though. For a few months, at least. Then one day, he randomly offered to let her borrow a certain manga, since he had heard she liked it. He was right that it was her favorite manga - but she didn't know how he would know that. Needless to say, it weirded her out...

[Ormagoden]

Me: Safe? Safe from what?
Guy: The Black Dragon Gang.

FFS! I don't think I would have been able to keep a straight face if someone said that to me.

[Lycan 01]

What does "FFS" mean? :smallconfused:

Oh believe me, I had to STRUGGLE not to laugh. But I figured that if the guy was as crazy convinced as he seemed, laughing about his mission probably wasn't a good idea.


I bumped into him at Wafflehouse a few months ago, actually. At 3 AM. Me and one of my closest friends, in fact the boyfriend from the previous story, had just wrapped up a Warhammer 40K game, and we wanted waffles. The guy was working there, and he waved at us when we entered. Thankfully, he wasn't our waiter. He was busy talking to some other people, anyway. Me and my friend ate our meal, and left when we were done. While my buddy paid for his meal, I noticed the napkin holders had little cards stuck in them, advertising certain meals. I plucked one from its nest, and surveyed it. I flipped it over, expecting to see more food items. Instead, I see that someone has written the guy's name in the center of the card in large, bold print. The rest of the card is covered in some girl's name, repeatedly written in various styles and scripts. I quickly placed the card back the way it was, and walked away like nothing had happened...

[Douglas]

What does "FFS" mean? :smallconfused:
For F***'s Sake, I think.

[Cobra_Ikari]

Um... I have a new akward moment from last night. :smallconfused:

I'm on the street behind a Giant Tiger, on my way back to the Games Shop that I left the car in from of, when two guys try to get my attention. One was fairly tall, and was looking a bit embarressed, and the other guy had a scruffy grey beard, and enough facial hair that I couldn't really make out his mouth. (He looked like one of those silly dolls...) And for some reason, probably because the beard-guy was drunk, they decided to ask me a rather odd question. "Do you know where the strip club is?" Now, I was going to point randomly, since I have no idea anyway, but I decided it would be easier to anwser, "Nope."

I walked pasted them and when I was almost out of earshot, I heard "I thought she worked there?" Now, I don't know if they were having a conversation and that was the one line I caught but...

>.>

What's a giant tiger? O_o

...and now I'm curious as to what you look like. >.>

[Ormagoden]

For F***'s Sake, I think.

Ding!
We have a winner! I like that webby abbreviation...although its non-standard.



What's a giant tiger? O_o

...and now I'm curious as to what you look like. >.>

Does it matter? I know their getting a hug anyway!

[Cobra_Ikari]

Does it matter? I know their getting a hug anyway!

Pretty much. =P

*huggles*

[EleventhHour]

What's a giant tiger? O_o

...and now I'm curious as to what you look like. >.>

It's a... well, cheap department store.

I'm pretty plain. :smallsigh: (That's why they had to be drunk.)

[Cobra_Ikari]

It's a... well, cheap department store.

I'm pretty plain. :smallsigh: (That's why they had to be drunk.)

Huh. I thought you meant you were following behind, like, a jungle animal. Or a man in a tiger suit. Which would have been kinda awesome. =3

Aww...*snuggleses*...I dun believe you. I bet you're really pretty. So there. =3

[zeratul]

Well it was midnight or so after seeing a movie, when me and my friends were hanging out on the corner of the street out side the mall. While we're talking, this random dude walks up to me and says "hey man, you got some weed?", I respond "Sorry dude, I don't have any on me". He walks away and we star laughing our asses off. All of us have been asked for cigs/pot at least once in the past year or so by random people, which we find rather amusing, although not entirely surprising.

[Rutskarn]

The opposite happened to me in high school.

I was crossing a catwalk between buildings. Loitering on it were two hoodie-wearing, decidedly giddy individuals.

One says, "Hey, freshman! Want to buy some weed?"

I say, "Actually, I'm a senior."

He reflects on that for a second. Then he asks, "Hey, senior! Want to buy some weed?"

I told him I was good, thanks.

I have no idea if he was serious or not.

[Lycan 01]

I blame this thread, and the meowing men mentioned in it, for what just happened to me.

Walking up the stairs from putting my clothes in the laundry, I reach the 2nd floor. As I turn the corner to head up the next flight of stairs, I pass by an open door. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice three guys sitting in the dorm room - one playing video games, two sprawled out on the sofa watching him with blank looks on their faces. Just as I walk past the door, I hear somebody inside the room shriek: "MREEAW!! MEEEEAAAAW!!!" like some sort of kitty on crack. I keep walking, and then pause halfway up the stairs when I hear somebody in the room go: "Dude... what the ****?" Followed a few seconds later by: "There was some guy coming up the stairs, so I meowed at him..." I then swiftly ascended the stairs when I saw a shadow appearing in the doorway.

Twas odd. :smallconfused:

[Inhuman Bot]

This thread is amazing. :p

Now, as for my own awkward moment..

I admit to wearing gothic-style clothes occasionally, as I was doing today. Nothing extremely elaborate, because I'd rather not have people at my school think I'm even stranger then they do allready.

It's a long bus ride from where I live to where my school is, so I got on the bus, which had it's last passengers get off where I was. So I put my headphones on and took my seat.

A few minutes later, a girl that's maybe... 18-20? Comes on. I've been told that between my looks and voice, I seem older then I really am. (13). I realized this now.

She sits beside me, which is kinda weird. I turn to the window and try to ignore her, but she starts talking to me.

Her: "Hey."
Me: I ignore her, as I find it weird when people talk to me, even if I know them. >.>
Her: "Nice clothes."
Me: I act like I can't here her, as I'm really awkward socially.
Her: She started talking about my looks/clothes, and how she liked the semi-gothic look I had.
Me: After swearing to never wear these clothes again, I risk hearing damage and switch to a song loud enough to ensure she can hear it, and hope she takes the hint.
Her: "Devil May Cry music? I love that game. I guess we've got alot in common."
Me: At this point, having NO idea of how to make this less creepy, decide I'll wak and say "I guess so. My stop's coming up, so mind moving?"
Her: "Oh no, and I like your voice."
Me: I give a look sort of like "O.o" and get off. She gets off too.
Her: "So.. Want to come see m-"
Me: I don't care what she's going to say next and comment "I'm 13, by the way.."
Her: ._. *She walks away.*

And that's the story of why I keep long hair and boring clothes. >.>

[Ormagoden]

This thread is amazing. :p

Now, as for my own awkward moment..

I admit to wearing gothic-style clothes occasionally, as I was doing today. Nothing extremely elaborate, because I'd rather not have people at my school think I'm even stranger then they do allready.

It's a long bus ride from where I live to where my school is, so I got on the bus, which had it's last passengers get off where I was. So I put my headphones on and took my seat.

A few minutes later, a girl that's maybe... 18-20? Comes on. I've been told that between my looks and voice, I seem older then I really am. (13). I realized this now.

She sits beside me, which is kinda weird. I turn to the window and try to ignore her, but she starts talking to me.

Her: "Hey."
Me: I ignore her, as I find it weird when people talk to me, even if I know them. >.>
Her: "Nice clothes."
Me: I act like I can't here her, as I'm really awkward socially.
Her: She started talking about my looks/clothes, and how she liked the semi-gothic look I had.
Me: After swearing to never wear these clothes again, I risk hearing damage and switch to a song loud enough to ensure she can hear it, and hope she takes the hint.
Her: "Devil May Cry music? I love that game. I guess we've got alot in common."
Me: At this point, having NO idea of how to make this less creepy, decide I'll wak and say "I guess so. My stop's coming up, so mind moving?"
Her: "Oh no, and I like your voice."
Me: I give a look sort of like "O.o" and get off. She gets off too.
Her: "So.. Want to come see m-"
Me: I don't care what she's going to say next and comment "I'm 13, by the way.."
Her: ._. *She walks away.*

And that's the story of why I keep long hair and boring clothes. >.>

That although awkward doesn't seem so bad hehehe

[Totally Guy]

Her: ._. *She walks away.*

And that's the story of why I keep long hair and boring clothes. >.>

Way to subvert the "And now she's my wife" ending. Totally didn't see it coming.

[Inhuman Bot]

That although awkward doesn't seem so bad hehehe

Well yeah, it could've been worse. :smalltongue:

[Linkavitch]

I was at the local Wally's World when in the frozen goods section, chasing my mom with the cart, I stop for a second and this little old guy with a funny accent says to me "Hey, man I love your hat!" This, in and of itself, is not that weird; after all, I do have an awesome hat.:smallcool: But, It got creepy when the guy starts looking me up and down, and says "Man, I love your hat your height (I'm like almost 6'2") and your leather jacket. I love everything about you!" Needless to say, I mumbled something to the effect of "Yeah, I'm pretty awesome..." and High-tailed it out of there.

[Stormthorn]

I'm sorry, I have this image of you looking at the mugger and saying "I'm sorry, this is my first time being mugged. Could you cut me some slack, please?" In a really sweet voice.

Schoolyard bully once tried to jack my stuff. I kept acting like i had no idea what was going on and treating him firendly and he eventualy gave up and left.

[comicshorse]

A year back around Christmass I had a stinking cold and high fever. So when I get in one night I neglect to lock the door. I'm sleeping fitfully when I get a really weird feeling somethings wrong so I switch on my bedside lamp and there's some chavvy looking guy halfway into my bedroom.
I look at him, I consider I really shouldn't have my left my sword (yes I own a sword) proped up in the corner next to the door where he can reach it and I can't. I try desperately to think of something to say
HIM: ' Do you sell dope'
ME: 'No'
HIM: ' Oh I thought you did '
ME: 'No. You have the wrong house.'
Him: 'Oh.' ( long pause) Sorry. I should leave then.'
ME: 'Yes'
HIM: ' You probabaly should lock your door'
ME: 'Yeah'
I get out of bed and follow him out into the hall.
HIM: ' You should really lock your door'
ME: ' Yeah I'll lock it right behind you'
Then he leans down, kisses me on the forehead and leaves.
I lock the door and go back to bed

[Mauve Shirt]

Wow, comicshorse, that is exceptionally creepy.

I'm trying to think of one of these... I've been approached by random 12-year-olds and asked for cigarettes or pot an unusual amount of times.

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

*DISCLAIMER*
I have long hair. I wear a hoody. I look like a drug dealer. My school is the center of most of the marijuana of Toronto. Hilarity Ensues.

Situation 1: My friends and I are sitting outside the school, eating lunch, when this guy comes up to us.

Junky: Hey, got any zigzags? [Zigzags are the paper you use to roll up marijuana]
Us: No, sorry
Junky: You sure you don't got any zigzags?
Us: No, we don't
Junky: I'll pay you 2 dollars for the zigzags.
Us: But... we don't have any...
Junky: Here's the deal, You give me the two dollars, and I'll give you some weed, and you give me the zigzags.
Us: No really, we don't have any zigzags, and don't want any drugs.

Situation 2: Same situation, different junky.
Junky 2: Want any drugs?
Us: No.
Junky 2: Ok.

See how easy it is to get drugs at my school? It's pathetic. Observe...

Situation 3: Do you know how creepy it is when somebody purposefully drops a bag of MJ right in front of you? We're just sitting there, he walks by, looks at us, drops a paper bag. We check inside, yup, marijuana leaves. We leave the bag where it is. With the weed inside, fyi.

Lastly, my favourite.

Situation 4: Getting the pattern yet? Same situation, different guy.

Junky 75: Got any weed?
Us: No, but he does *pointing at random student*

We then watch as the man goes over to the students, and actually buys weed off of him. We feel kinda stupid.

[varthalon]

Living on the 7th floor of a condo complex. The building is secure and the neighborhood is really safe so I rarely bothered to lock the door except when I was a asleep or out.

So one night I'm sitting on the couch watching TV in my bathrobe (I'd just gotten out of the shower) when a little old lady opens the door and get two or three steps into my condo before she sees me. She stops dead, stares at me for a second then looks around the room. Totally embarrased she backs out apologizing repeatedly.

I live in unit 708. She lived in unit 808, had gotten off at the wrong floor, and walked into what would have been her unit if she had been on the right floor.

I now keep my door locked pretty much all of the time.

[Ormagoden]

I wonder how many awkward moments in the world would have been prevented had the door been locked. hahaha

[peacenlove]

Peacenlove decides to let his hair get longer.
(Note: I have NO facial hair and i tend to dress in long clothes, often with heavy metal bands on them, Iced Earth being my favorite )

Part 1:
Local band performing on a beach. Mediocre performance, but i was a lone boy with 3 girls :smallbiggrin:. I notice a boy around 16-18 looking constantly at us. I figure out that he wants to talk to one of the girls. The music got boring so i decided to sit alone on a bench and drink a beer.

After 5 minutes: The guy comes behind me and hugs me.
Guy: You are the most beautiful girl i have ever laid my eyes upon.
Me: (Deciding if i should release myself from him, after that i realized from his breath that he was drunk) Umm are you sure? :smallconfused:
Guy: Yes from the time i waited for you to be alone so we could talk.
Me: I am a guy you know...
Then that guy started crying, released me and cursed of his luck and how unlucky he is with women :smallfrown: I immediatly felt sorry for him but i didn't know what to do.

Part 2:
Walking alone in thessaloniki
2 Old guys on a bench: Look at this gorgeous girl over there.
Me: :smallfurious: I am a frikking boy (annoyed because the previous day 2 guys hit on me, one at the train and one 30 minutes afterwards. ANd they weren't exactly eloquent :smallamused:)
2 Old guys on a bench: Yes but if you were a girl...
Me: :smalleek:

Part 3: We were discussing with a friend of mine a photo with 5 girls and me on a restaurant. Also he was looking for a girl and i decided to help him meet one. (I had my hair cut at that time)

Guy: Oh boy those girls are nice but there is one in particular i imagine myself (insert your favorite naughty scene) to her.
Me: Which? (I regretted that)
Guy: That over there with the long black hair.
Me: Err that is ... me. :smallamused:

He didn't talk to me for the remainder of the day :smallbiggrin:

[Cobra_Ikari]

Peacenlove decides to let his hair get longer.
(Note: I have NO facial hair and i tend to dress in long clothes, often with heavy metal bands on them, Iced Earth being my favorite )

Part 1:
Local band performing on a beach. Mediocre performance, but i was a lone boy with 3 girls :smallbiggrin:. I notice a boy around 16-18 looking constantly at us. I figure out that he wants to talk to one of the girls. The music got boring so i decided to sit alone on a bench and drink a beer.

After 5 minutes: The guy comes behind me and hugs me.
Guy: You are the most beautiful girl i have ever laid my eyes upon.
Me: (Deciding if i should release myself from him, after that i realized from his breath that he was drunk) Umm are you sure? :smallconfused:
Guy: Yes from the time i waited for you to be alone so we could talk.
Me: I am a guy you know...
Then that guy started crying, released me and cursed of his luck and how unlucky he is with women :smallfrown: I immediatly felt sorry for him but i didn't know what to do.

Part 2:
Walking alone in thessaloniki
2 Old guys on a bench: Look at this gorgeous girl over there.
Me: :smallfurious: I am a frikking boy (annoyed because the previous day 2 guys hit on me, one at the train and one 30 minutes afterwards. ANd they weren't exactly eloquent :smallamused:)
2 Old guys on a bench: Yes but if you were a girl...
Me: :smalleek:

Part 3: We were discussing with a friend of mine a photo with 5 girls and me on a restaurant. Also he was looking for a girl and i decided to help him meet one. (I had my hair cut at that time)

Guy: Oh boy those girls are nice but there is one in particular i imagine myself (insert your favorite naughty scene) to her.
Me: Which? (I regretted that)
Guy: That over there with the long black hair.
Me: Err that is ... me. :smallamused:

He didn't talk to me for the remainder of the day :smallbiggrin:

...Nameless? Is that you? =P

*hugs*

Yay for pretty boys. =3

[Slayn82]

A few years ago, i went to a end of year party with a friend of mine. She is very beautifull, and i kept glancing at her, trying to make my best impression. In the table next to us, was a woman with a baby, breastfeeding. My friend started talking with the woman, looking to the adorable little kid. So, after some time and chat, i take a leave to go to the bathroom.

Where the husband of said woman, drunk like a skunk, with a broken beer bottle in his hands, comes and makes threats to me, thinking i was lookin at his wife.:smalleek:

Fortunatelly, i could calm him enought to explain that i was interested in the blonde girl with i came, before things got worse. Anyway, i managed to convince my company to go play eight ball in the other side of the club.

[Jack Squat]

At work, some lady came in one day and was deaf, though she could read lips, so that made it easier for me - not knowing sign language and all. She said she was looking for "paper cups of cake." Confused, I had her repeat it, and then write it down to make sure I was hearing correctly. I pointed her down picnic supplies, saying that's where the paper cups are. As soon as she walked off, it clicked with me that she wanted cupcake liners. I felt bad, but we were pretty busy, so I couldn't hunt her down and correct my mistake.

Turns out 5 minutes later, she walks out of the isle with a pack of them, so I suppose we had some on a hanging display in there. Ah well...so long as it works out.

I've had some lady compliment how nice I'd look in a pinstripe 3 piece suit, and that I should actually wear it instead of buying it for a Halloween costume...this was at a Goodwill.

Also, not to me, but about me.

Last Night I was at work. I'd headed off to unload a truck that came in late, and when I got back one of my friends (a cashier) told me about an interesting exchange with a lady customer.

Basically, she said that she wanted to kidnap me and take me home to her daughter.


I've had similar conversations with women closer to my age, but those aren't near as awkward or creepy. I suppose the good news is my self-esteem won't be plummeting anytime soon if I'm kidnappable from being so darn good looking :smalltongue:

More to come as I remember them. I work in a grocery store, so I shouldn't really have a shortage of them.

[Sipex]

Our roommate left the door unlocked to our apartment one morning when she walks out...yeah, you can see where this is headed.

My wife and I are in bed, au naturel, sleeping away the morning before work when our bedroom door opens and this older guy is standing there. I bolt awake and panic and he goes "Oh, sorry!" and closes the door.

I put some pants on, see him leaving the apartment and catch him in the hall.

Turns out he was a worker renovating the apartment above ours and got the numbers screwed up.

I reamed our roommate out after that.

[Lamech]

Peacenlove decides to let his hair get longer.
(Note: I have NO facial hair and i tend to dress in long clothes, often with heavy metal bands on them, Iced Earth being my favorite )

Part 1:
Local band performing on a beach. Mediocre performance, but i was a lone boy with 3 girls :smallbiggrin:. I notice a boy around 16-18 looking constantly at us. I figure out that he wants to talk to one of the girls. The music got boring so i decided to sit alone on a bench and drink a beer.

After 5 minutes: The guy comes behind me and hugs me.
Guy: You are the most beautiful girl i have ever laid my eyes upon.
Me: (Deciding if i should release myself from him, after that i realized from his breath that he was drunk) Umm are you sure? :smallconfused:
Guy: Yes from the time i waited for you to be alone so we could talk.
Me: I am a guy you know...
Then that guy started crying, released me and cursed of his luck and how unlucky he is with women :smallfrown: I immediatly felt sorry for him but i didn't know what to do.

Part 2:
Walking alone in thessaloniki
2 Old guys on a bench: Look at this gorgeous girl over there.
Me: :smallfurious: I am a frikking boy (annoyed because the previous day 2 guys hit on me, one at the train and one 30 minutes afterwards. ANd they weren't exactly eloquent :smallamused:)
2 Old guys on a bench: Yes but if you were a girl...
Me: :smalleek:

Part 3: We were discussing with a friend of mine a photo with 5 girls and me on a restaurant. Also he was looking for a girl and i decided to help him meet one. (I had my hair cut at that time)

Guy: Oh boy those girls are nice but there is one in particular i imagine myself (insert your favorite naughty scene) to her.
Me: Which? (I regretted that)
Guy: That over there with the long black hair.
Me: Err that is ... me. :smallamused:

He didn't talk to me for the remainder of the day :smallbiggrin:

Hilarity, utter hilarity.

[comicshorse]

Various posts by peacenlove

I can't beat those. However as I wear my hair in a ponytail I do have one. This time in the Gents a guy tapped me on the back and informed me : " This is the Gents darling":smallsmile:

Poor guy was mortified when I turned round and he noticed I was a guy

[Cobra_Ikari]

Various posts by peacenlove

I can't beat those. However as I wear my hair in a ponytail I do have one. This time in the Gents a guy tapped me on the back and informed me : " This is the Gents darling":smallsmile:

Poor guy was mortified when I turned round and he noticed I was a guy

...by your face, or... >.>

:smallamused:

[comicshorse]

My face, thank god

[Thrawn183]

I was sitting at the top floor of the dining hall, with my back to the stairs when someone starts running their hands through my hair and then massaging my scalp.

It felt great so I didn't bother to look and see who it was. Anyways, after a minute or two of that, the girl (it turns out) walks around from behind me and begins to say something when she turns white as a sheet of paper. I'd never seen her before and she managed to stutter out something about thinking I was somebody else before leaving. I tried to say thanks, but as she was practically running away, she was gone before I got a chance.

A little weird and random, but I'm certainly not complaining. Just wish I knew her name.

[zeratul]

See how easy it is to get drugs at my school? It's pathetic. Observe...



I guess the advantage at my school is that even though most people there smoke, I'm pretty sure most of them have their own dealers so I'm not constantly getting hassled for looking like a dealer. Only happens to me outside of school.

[Shraik]

So a friend and I were walking back from Subway with our food in hand, when we see three people walk by. One was a tall dude who looked like a hippie(ozzy glases, hat, long hair, goatee, baggy clothes) some chick with a dog, and some short weird dude. The dude stops and asks us if we "play" doing some hand motion. My friend and I, confused, ask what he means. He then asks if we play instruments, and my friend says no but tells him i play the drums. He looked like he just found the fountain of youth right there and asks me how old I was. I tell him and he just blows it off "Gahh, too young. Alright Cya guys." and they keep walking. A complete stranger almost invited me into a band.

[Mr. Mud]

I wonder how many awkward moments in the world would have been prevented had the door been locked. hahaha

QTF.

A lockable doorknob: $7
5 screws and a screwdriver: $3
Said knobs installation: $2

Not seeing what should never be saw with preteen eyes? Priceless :smallamused:

[peacenlove]

I was sitting at the top floor of the dining hall, with my back to the stairs when someone starts running their hands through my hair and then massaging my scalp.

It felt great so I didn't bother to look and see who it was. Anyways, after a minute or two of that, the girl (it turns out) walks around from behind me and begins to say something when she turns white as a sheet of paper. I'd never seen her before and she managed to stutter out something about thinking I was somebody else before leaving. I tried to say thanks, but as she was practically running away, she was gone before I got a chance.

A little weird and random, but I'm certainly not complaining. Just wish I knew her name.

You. Lucky! I Envy. You. SO MUCH. :smalltongue:

I get confused for someone else all the time.

An old lady stopped by and asked me for an autograph for her young daughter. (Confused me for a pop star :smallbiggrin:)

Also a guy came close and stared at me intensely (i was wearing headset). He asked me to remove my headset and he preached to me in the middle of the street of how unpolite of me is the fact that i don't greet my uncles anymore and how spoiled i have become :smallsigh:. I had never seen the guy btw.

A girl was dating me for 2 weeks because apparently my face looks like Bruce Dickinson's (lead singer of Iron Maiden) face :smallannoyed:.

Also a little backstory for the next moment:
In Crete, where my university is located, at the villages there is the thing called "vendetta". Various families there have long time grudges (some even dating back at the 12th century) and kill each other frequently (they even killed a guy connected with one of the families in America!). Thankfully in the main city this fact remains unnoticed but, as it seems, one cannot be too careful. Note that i have no connection with these as i was born in a disstant place and have no roots originating in crete.

Me, entering a custom costume shop: Hallo :smallsmile: I would like the costume of a pirate please.
Girl at the check: :smallannoyed: We don't serve you go away.
Me: :smallconfused::smalleek:
Girl at the check: :smallfurious: How dare you enter the shop! I will have my brother kill you! (and various other threats)
Me: Trying to calm her then remembering all this folklore, i showed her my ID card.
Errm i am NOT who are you looking for. :smallannoyed:
Girl at the check: Oh but you look like him...

Never did i step on that shop again :smallannoyed:

[comicshorse]

Just remembered this one.
Some years back and I'm in the cinema. The place is a real old fleapit and clearly on the way out . The whole place is filthy and in a terrible state of repair.
The film starts so I lean back in my chair, and drop my arms on to the seatrests. But the seatrest to my right isn't there so instead of resting on it my hand drops, straight into the lap of the guy sitting next to me :smalleek:
I snatch my hand back like its on fire and stare straight ahead for the rest of the film. Longest film of my life

[The Demented One]

Shouting matches with strangers are much more fun when they're Italian, and you only know a handful of words suitable for shouting...

[Vorpal Soda]

I'd have to say the time when I working behind the counter of a charity shop, and some woman came up to the counter, and informed me that she had soiled herself, and wanted a free pair of trousers. Having no idea what to say in response, I referred her to the manager, who promptly said no.

Less awkward and more amusing, was a woman who wanted to buy a skirt being demonstrated in the shop window by a mannequin. This meant that I had to grab and yank down a skirt in full view of the street.

I wasn't there at the time, but apparently someone donated a bag of stuff, which turned out to include bloodstained clothes, and a knife, which was promptly handed over to the police. Unsurprisingly, donating a murder weapon proved to be the killer's downfall.