Best way to invade a country in D&D?

[Volkov]

By best, I do not mean the most practical way, but instead I mean the most awesome way.

[Siosilvar]

On a dragon. ;)

[LurkerInPlayground]

Flying fortresses.

Of course, undead armies are classic.

[Myrmex]

Plane shift the entire country to Acheron, the eternal battlefield.

[Eldariel]

Gate a horde of Angels in?

[Volkov]

For me, it'd be an army of giant arthropods, Insects filling the skies, Crustaceans clogging the seas, Arachnids swarming the land. And so on.

[LordZarth]

The most awesome way?

As a PC. By yourself.

With a sword. A big sword.

On a dragon.

A big dragon.

By yourself.

[Brendan]

Charm person the king or whatever ruler to create a huge celebration for himself (definitely not anti-alignment) that every single citizen must attend. Write a symbol of insanity on the front of the podium, and on every exit. No more enemy country. The problem is population size, so in that case, just the nobles and the high level guards. after that, only a small amount of countryside razing is needed.

[Crafty Cultist]

A heavily armed sky fortress the size of a large city with enough fire power to level a kingdom and enough mechanical flying soldiers to blot out the sun

Mwahahaha

[Pharaoh's Fist]

Flood their country with gold to create economic problems and destabilize the government. Then support the inevitable opposition party/rebellion and when the new regime comes to power, they will either be under your control or very close allies.

[Volkov]

Or enough insects to eat the sun. If they were oh gods the heat!!!!! THE HEAT!!!!! AAAAAAAUUUGH RADIATION!!! Proof.

[lvl 1 sharnian]

Walk in the country and become a citizen/conscript/something and

IRON HEART SURGE!!! THE COUNTRY

[Foryn Gilnith]

Flood their country with gold to create economic problems

Victory. D&D economics FTW

[Volkov]

How many termites would it take to completely devour a nation's wood, and how many army ants would you need to eat all the people?

[Prak]

With a crown (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0434.html)

[mostlyharmful]

I always feel that Giant Mechs with mounted deathrays are always the height of style no matter the genre.:smallcool:

[charl]

With a horde of giffs riding giant space hamsters.

[Vexxation]

Gray Elf Factotum 1, 20 Intelligence. Feat: Skill Focus(Forgery). Proceed to Forge a document granting you dominion over the kingdom, signed by the King's patron deity.

Since Forgery is an opposed check, you will win. If absolute victory is needed, level up until access to Moment of Prescience, either through scroll or Arcane Dilettante (if possible).

Easy, fast, and no bloodshed needed.

[mostlyharmful]

Gray Elf Factotum 1, 20 Intelligence. Feat: Skill Focus(Forgery). Proceed to Forge a document granting you dominion over the kingdom, signed by the King's patron deity.

Since Forgery is an opposed check, you will win. If absolute victory is needed, level up until access to Moment of Prescience, either through scroll or Arcane Dilettante (if possible).

Easy, fast, and no bloodshed needed.

Where's the fun if they don't measure your greatness in terms of blast radius???:smalltongue:

[Crafty Cultist]

Where's the fun if they don't measure your greatness in terms of blast radius???:smalltongue:

Seconded:smallamused:

[Johel]

Get an Enervation wand.
Find humans.
Blast.
"Command Undead" the Wights.

Find a village.
Send the Wights.
More Wights for you.

Find other villages.
Send the Wights.
Ect...

Find a tavern.
Sip a drink while the kingdom struggle to stop the apocalypse.
When apocalypse is under control, Go to the King.
Blast.
"Command Undead" the Wight.

[Samb]

The Githyanki had it right. Red dragon mounts, flying fortresses, planeshifting in troops and supplies to anywhere, infantry excelling in magical, martial and psionic combat, even the lowly foot soldior can dimentional door and daze enemies.

Logisics are easy since it is only a planeshift away, which all Githyanki can do at will (depending if you think Beloved of the Lich queen is canon).

[Tiki Snakes]

The most awesome way?

As a PC. By yourself.

With a sword. A big sword.

On a dragon.

A big dragon.

By yourself.

AS a Dragon, by yourself.

Big sword weilding uber-stooge optional.

[Akal Saris]

With a horde of giffs riding giant space hamsters.

I run a 3.5 Birthright game, and one side adventure in the same world did indeed involve giffs riding giant space hamsters attempting to take over a kingdom. Sadly, it was foiled when the hadozee spy was revealed ("This monkey is not who he appears to be!")

[charl]

I run a 3.5 Birthright game, and one side adventure in the same world did indeed involve giffs riding giant space hamsters attempting to take over a kingdom. Sadly, it was foiled when the hadozee spy was revealed ("This monkey is not who he appears to be!")

Awesome. :smallbiggrin:

[Starbuck_II]

Riding That Damn Crab. Yes, using Handle animal you dometicated it. And riding it.

In fact, a Calvery of them. Strike bear fear in their hearts, hear the lamention of their women, and drink hard me ma-ties.

[Volkov]

An Army of Giant Dire Turkey cavalry would also be quite deadly. Your enemy would be too busy laughing to respond to your attack. :smallbiggrin:

[KitsuneKionchi]

Turn their capital city into a giant spell circle for a summoning ritual to bring back some great evil that destroys half their country in the process and enslaves the other half.

Even better if that great evil wants to go attack a third country (i.e. not yours or the invading coutnry), so you don't have to worry about it later.

[PersonMan]

I'd probably combine several of the above mentioned-such as invading from a giant, floating castle made of undead, with a big sword atop a huge dragon, alone. With a crown. Wielding That Damn Crab in my offhand and calmly sipping carbonated water from a straw coming from aforementioned crown.

I would do this after destabilizing their economy, and the resistance party would be the raw materials for my aforementioned giant, flying castle made of undead. I would then become a hero by buying up all the gold for a variety of goods, mixed in such a way to insure economic stability, and use the gold to pay for the pure gold hilt of my That Damn Crab weapon. The sword would be made of the remaining gold, as would my crown. They would also have Iron Hearts, which would continuously Surge, allowing me to travel at high velocity, my sword and crown/drink-dispenser leading the way.

The termites and ants would come in from the other side, and I would get funding to pay the dragon to let me ride it with the sales of my new termite/ant repellent.

In other words: Verily.

[Sir_Elderberry]

Walk in the country and become a citizen/conscript/something and

IRON HEART SURGE!!! THE COUNTRY

I laughed at this, mostly just because of the image of all these nobles sitting around and suddenly looking up, saying, "Huh. I guess we don't have political power anymore." and going home.

[Zeta Kai]

Far Realm 'em all & let Cthulhu sort 'em out.

[dragonfan6490]

You are a level 20 Evoker. You have 100 apprentices of varying levels from 5-19. All of your prepared spells are varying types of Fireball. You all cast said Fireballs all day, every day, until there is nothing left. So you see, it is the most awesome way and the most convenient way! Everyone wins!

...except of course the peasants you burninated. They do not win.

[Saintheart]

On a horde of dragons.

Each and every one carrying a bard with a Ring of Communication so each and every one of them can play "Ride of the Valkyries" simultaneously and in tune.

Recitation of the line "I love the smell of napalm in the morning" after razing the local village is optional.

[Yukitsu]

Be a level 20 druid, and cast shapechange on yourself, sharing it with your animal companion. Turn yourself into a titan that looks like Chuck Norris and Samuel L. Jackson (at the same time) and your animal companion into a gold dragon. Then whilst carrying a massive tree as a hammer, shooting lightning and tornadoes from your eyes, and being surrounded by a flock of giant eagles, ride into town on the dragon with the battle cry of "I'm the king of m*****F***ing AWESOME!" Anyone that doesn't immediately worship you as the rightful king of all things awesome will promptly be lynched by everything else.

If your DM lets you, power an electric guitar and amps with your lightning eyes, and play some metal while you're at it.

[Emmerask]

Go to the king, jumplomance in front of him be the new king :smallcool:

[Foryn Gilnith]

Jumplomancy + Persistent Footsteps of the Divine?
Jumplomancy + Masochism?

[SurlySeraph]

Flying armored bears. With laser-beam eyes.

[Berserk Monk]

By best, I do not mean the most practical way, but instead I mean the most awesome way.

Most awesome way?


This guy

http://www.tentonhammer.com/system/files/images/Boba+Fett.preview.jpg

riding one of these

http://www.crystalinks.com/dragon.gif

[Zen Master]

Hm ... nothing quite like insects.

You dominate a formian queen, breed an endless army in the deep, dark depths beneath the kingdom, and when ready, emerge from the sewers and unite all in the light and glory and endless, mindless and unto death grinding toil of the hive mind. Hooray. Freedom is toil. Obedience is bliss. Your life only has meaning in the service of the Unity.

It's funny, really. Cause, there really isn't any more terrifying monster in all D&D-dom than the formian.

[Sliver]

Get epic Escape Artist, hide inside some noble that is going to some royal ball or w/e where the ruler of the country will visit. When you are closest to said king.. GET OUT.

[bosssmiley]

I run a 3.5 Birthright game, and one side adventure in the same world did indeed involve giffs riding giant space hamsters attempting to take over a kingdom. Sadly, it was foiled when the hadozee spy was revealed ("This monkey is not who he appears to be!")

AAAAAAAAAGH! The pain!!! :smalleek:

on-topic: Horde of Flumphs (led by the legendary Flumph warlord Genghis Phlarp)

[random11]

Call me old fashioned, but I prefer a huge mundane army.

The rain of arrows, the trumpets that call for a cavalry charge, the thundering sound of thousands of heavy infantry all marching together.

[Volkov]

Call me old fashioned, but I prefer a huge mundane army.

The rain of arrows, the trumpets that call for a cavalry charge, the thundering sound of thousands of heavy infantry all marching together.

I myself like an attack from land, air, and sea. Space as well if possible. That's why I fell in love with the red alert series. I mean look at this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5UNPlPUUHms&feature=related&fmt=18

[LibraryOgre]

Plane shift the entire country to Acheron, the eternal battlefield.

Hee-hee. Planar Transposition, the Psychoportation High Science in Dark Sun.

"Hi. I'm going to take a chunk of the Prime Material and stick it in the hell dimension of my choice for a few minutes, then bring it back."

Good times. Good times.

[Frog Dragon]

Diplomance Asmodeus to do it for you.

[Roupe]

During the night.
Army of Wraiths that attacks through the ground. Anything they kill becomes wraiths as well.

But I did like the idea of a flying castle with a huge symbol of insanity displayed.

[BRC]

Rhinoceros Cavalry. Siege Golems (From Heroes of Battle). And trained combat dinosaurs.

[jiriku]

Rhinoceros Cavalry. Siege Golems (From Heroes of Battle). And trained combat dinosaurs.

Dwarven rhinoceros cavalry. With both the dwarves and the rhinos in heavy plate.

[Tyndmyr]

Hire a small, rag-tag band of adventurers. It never fails.

[BRC]

Dwarven rhinoceros cavalry. With both the dwarves and the rhinos in heavy plate.
If there was only some way to make the Rhinos fly...

[Sergeantbrother]

Just as in the real world (when can you say that about D&D?) the best way to invade a country depends on what resources you have to work with and what defensive abilities your target nation has. Invasion depends upon using your own resources in the most efficient way possible to counter the advantages of your enemy and exploit their weaknesses.

[Volkov]

Just as in the real world (when can you say that about D&D?) the best way to invade a country depends on what resources you have to work with and what defensive abilities your target nation has. Invasion depends upon using your own resources in the most efficient way possible to counter the advantages of your enemy and exploit their weaknesses.

I specifically said, the most awesome way you could think of.

[Roupe]

I just remembered my favorite.

Army of Giant mechs wearing invisble cloaks -that crush and stomp the opposition. (Escaflowne).

For a Lowtech Medival Fantasy setting, Just have Giant warriors instead of Mechs.

[Asbestos]

Exterminate all of the owls of one gender in the nation, then exterminate all of the bears of the opposite gender. Let D&D nature take it's course.

Alternatively, find a really innocuous base creature and make it a fiendish-draconic-pseudonatural creature (at least) and unleash it.

[Triaxx]

No, walk into the throne room, sit on the throne and proclaim yourself king. Oh, and kill anyone that tries with your band of ancient geysers.

[taltamir]

scry their ruler. Teleport. Dominate / mind rape / whatever.
Congrats, you are now the new ruler.

[Wings of Peace]

Multiple persistent castings of persistent Apocalypse From The Sky.

[Ormur]

A hoard of heavily armed monsters marching under flying castles blotting out the sky and raining down destruction.

[Elves-as-People]

A single plump mystic theurge, unarmed and with no means of dealing damage, convincing everyone that she'll make a better ruler than their present one, leading to the banishment of said previous leader.

[random11]

I myself like an attack from land, air, and sea. Space as well if possible. That's why I fell in love with the red alert series. I mean look at this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5UNPlPUUHms&feature=related&fmt=18


Personally, I prefer fantasy setting, but yes, the "Hell March" opening is awesome!

The movie "Hero" is an excellent example of why I like "regular" armies so much, and while I couldn't find the scene I wanted from the movie, this one (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hb5nZSlou1o&feature=related) is good enough.

[Laharal]

To Person-Man: More awesome mashup/summary ever :)

Like Haggard in Bad Company: Single-handedly invading a neutral country while shooting and shouting, of course....

[Longcat]

Locate. City. Bomb.

[Sliver]

Locate. City. Bomb.

Doesn't really work.

[Tyndmyr]

Fell Drain Locate City Wightpocalypse.

Much better.

[Poil]

Hire dwarves to fill the rivers, lakes and wells with carp and then you simply flood the country with lava to clean up when everyone is dead.

Either that or mount them on dire elephants and charge through the place stomping it flat.

[Leewei]

The most awesome way?

Well, first I'd take the odd eight or ten undead knights and put them on sleek, black flying dragon-like critters. Assemble a huge army of pirates and bestial humanoids. Throw in some giants and even big, big animals. Elephants are big -- ooh! GIANT ELEPHANTS. I'd have this awesome host march on my enemies and batter down their gate with a ram made from the giant heavy mace of the god I follow.

It'd be glorious. Nobody has ever pulled one off like that before.