(Finished) Let's play Galactic Civilizations II! "All the lights in the sky are... ?"

[Cubey]

Welcome! A word of introduction - Galactic Civilizations II (http://galciv2.com/) is a great 4X space strategy title, made by people at Stardock (http://stardock.com/) who are also great. It's so great, that making an LP was only a matter of time. So here we go!

Update list with links:
Chapter I: It's a New (Endless) Frontier (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7244325&postcount=2)
Chapter II: Asteroid Angst (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7248626&postcount=33)
Chapter III: Wherein Cubey finds himself frustrated and overworked (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7258625&postcount=48)
Chapter IV: How to overuse the word "starbase" (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7261299&postcount=58)
Chapter V: Pick on a homicidal maniac your own size! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7267351&postcount=100)
Chapter VI: I'm back - short title, long update (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7270710&postcount=109)
Chapter VII: Diplomacy is a hard game (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7275101&postcount=138)
Chapter VIII: War is a dangerous place (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7282302&postcount=178)
Chapter IX: Endless fun in the Korath Korner (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7290055&postcount=211)
Chapter X: Now you're thinking in Bigscale! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7296833&postcount=231)
Chapter XI: Trying not to make Macross references (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7309733&postcount=260)
Chapter XII: Listen to my song! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7315879&postcount=293)
Chapter XIII: A great day to be a Spiral (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7326541&postcount=327)
Chapter XIV: Just one year of love... (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7333951&postcount=334)
Chapter XV: I'm on a cultural roll, and rock'n'roll is involved (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7340514&postcount=345)
Chapter XVI: Bet you did (not) see that coming (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7357895&postcount=367)
Chapter XVII: Overwhelming dominance is not always a good thing (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7375543&postcount=386)
Chapter XVIII: This is our last dance! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7393486&postcount=402)

I'm going to play GalCiv II with its newest expansion, Twilight of the Arnor. It gives you lots of new features compared to the vanilla version, including different research trees for each race and giant Death Terror Stars to destroy whole star systems.

My reports on the LP will jump from IC to OOC with no rhyme or reason other than me feeling like it whatever is more fun for the reader. Expect witty titles for each chapter of the report when I can think of any. Like a wise man once said, "When in doubt, MST3k stuff".

This thread is going to be very image intensive. That's how LPs just go. Also, since this is a Let's Play, then I'm waiting for reader input! If you have advice, comments, or are even masochistic enough to pretend to be a character in the Let's Play (random Joe Schmoe or a minister, whatever goes) then go for it. You people are the lifeblood, I just make updates.

And because I am a fanboy, expect occasional references to stuff I like. Mostly science fiction and anime, especially Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Don't worry, I'll try to keep references rare and the whole thing understandable for everyone.

A list of my loyal advisors, puppet ministers and other disposable flunkies:

Celesyne: Expressed interest in service and was promptly lost. Located as a colony ship captain some time later. Current status - unknown, but will probably reappear at one point or another.
chiasaur11: Bloodthirsty land forces general. Makes Patton look like Gandhi in comparison. Note to self: never meet in person if there's no one else in the room.
Terraoblivion: Secretary of education. Makes sure unwashed kids become less unwashed. We're dealing with Spirals here so she has a lot of work to do.
kamikasei: Ghost of the Interstellarnet AI. Responsible for all bad things that happen. Yes, even that.
Tavar: Minister of Science. Doesn't trump Leeron in technical genius and fabulousness yet, but he's trying.
Mercenary Pen: Head of Defense Procurement. An independent contractor, his job is to design and provide weapons. I don't know where he gets all the wonderful toys from.
Fri: Brave and very unlucky test pilot. His units have a tendency towards impractical design and being in the worst place at the worst possible time. Has a knack for survival, but that's not a good thing because it means he has to suffer more.
The_Glyphstone: Chief diplomat. Responsible for making first contact with other races and being traumatized by their looks and local customs. How he learns all the alien languages is a mystery, and not a pretty one.
Blayze: Minister of Lasers. FIRE FIRE FIREEEEE!!!
DeafnotDumb: Nobody's really sure of his rank, but he handles weapon testing. Read: if it has enough drills and/or guns, it passes. Favorite test subject: Kif.
Even Human: Just a pilot. Has a greater life expectancy than our local Patrick Colaseur, Fri. More opportunities for promotions, too.
Rettu Skcollob: Former leader of the Mercantile party. Will probably try to stab me in the back and usurp power at the earliest given opportunity. Belongs to the War Party now, and has a fancy hat.
AgentPaper: Also known as Warlord Moustache, a member of the War Party. He's supposed to be a diplomat but judging from his association, I don't really want to know what kind of diplomacy is he doing.
Domochevsky: Chief Necromancer. Raising the dead is impossible so his job is all smoke and mirrors. Also responsible for keeping wounded soldiers alive. I bet he thought his position would be more exciting when he applied.
thefinalbattle: A mecha pilot. Also likes to examine exploding pickles.
Ka-ther "Yaktan" Fangfoot: Another pilot. Hot-blooded but cowardly. Wants to crush enemies using the power of FRIENDSHIP.
Artanis: Minister of Missiles. Likes blowing stuff up, and what else do you need on this position?
Hunter Noventa: A starship captain wannabe. He hopes for something that can turn into a giant robot. It's more likely than you think.
Tengu_temp: As above. Yes, the "temp" is a part of the name.

Kif (doesn't post on the forum): Our army's first line of battle! He's very brave, determined and skillful - all because I told him so. His favorite hobby is not being yelled at by Cubey or chiasaur11. He doesn't have a lot of hobby time.

[Cubey]

Chapter I: It's a New (Endless) Frontier

Hello, universe. Here we are, eagerly waiting for a chance to explore and conquer you. I'm sure you're full of alien races to make friends with... if they're friendly that is. If they're not, we're going to crush them into a pulp! And then make friends with whatever is left. Oh yes.

But first, let's customize what exactly we want our universe to be like. Must be some nice universe, willing to change and adapt if you only tell it to.
http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/605/lp001setting.png
Okay, it's not really a whole universe, only a single galaxy. But we want to keep it BIG. Galaxies are big, right? Well, this one is Immense. That's the biggest possible size in GalCiv II. How big it is? You'll see soon.

I've decided we need as little habitable planets as possible. With the galaxy so giant, that still means they will be all over the place. Same for anomalies. Rare is not so rare when the scale is so large. Eight Minor Races, because we like company (what Minor Races are, I'll explain later in this chapter)... and that's all. The rest of the options is pretty much default. There's an exception, I forgot if I used the setting where the total number of planets is Rare or just Uncommon (http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/2631/lp002settingalternate.png), if it's the former then it means very few planets, which means even less habitable ones. Ah, we'll manage. Also, I accidentally set up the number of asteroid fields to Abundant, the largest possible quantity. Too late to change now, and besides, what could go wrong?

Famous last words.

Okay, we're all thinking big scale now, Universe and everything, but what about our race? I present to you...
http://img688.imageshack.us/img688/4406/lp003race.png

The Spiral Beings. After Simon freed us from the tyranny of Anti-Spirals, we are finally ready to become part of the larger universe! But the new leader is no one else but yours truly, Cubey. Actually, it was supposed to be Rossiu, but nobody liked him so instead it's me. Like my picture? So handsome. Wait, I'm wearing a fancy space helmet so you can't see my face. Too bad. Admire the Gurren Brigade logo instead. You're going to see it often.

Time for lots of screenshots that will describe what exactly the Spirals as a race are good at.
http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/266/lp004abilities.png
Our starships (read: giant robots and whatever else I feel like designing) are powerful, tough and repair quickly. They also hit first before the sluggish enemy has a chance to react. That's Spiral Power for you - don't mess with it. We also research stuff pretty quickly. You can't stop the power of evolution and endless improvement!
And finally, we are Courageous (see the screenie to know what it does), Creative (research finishes before schedule sometimes) and Lucky (nice stuff happens from time to time). These three abilities cost us only 1 point each, out of 15 - so they're total hax, especially the two last ones, which work at random.

http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/1153/lp005political.png
Gotta pick a political party. And there is only one choice for a real guardian of the people! We're the Populists - not just your everyday demagogues, but someone who really, really wants to work for the betterment of the people. And we will! We're going to make everyone happy, and keep everyone safe and protected! The Spirals demand it. Saint Kamina wouldn't have it any other way. And if I try to disagree, he has a punch to set me straight.
It's not the best options mechanics-wise, but hey... I already imbalanced the game enough by choosing Lucky and Creative.

http://img256.imageshack.us/img256/6664/lp006style.png
Starship appearance. Not much to say here - every single Spiral knows what the colors of Gurren Lagann are. Dark red of courage and bright green of Spiral Power!
As for the default style, I'm choosing the Korath. Of course, I'll design my own models, because theirs are ugly. But it's still amusing - the Korath are evil, genocidal and moustache-twirling, and we are almost nauseatingly good. But we'll still kick their collective asses, oh yes we will!

http://img190.imageshack.us/img190/2746/lp007tech.png
The tech tree! I have to pick one, or I could make my own one if I wasn't so lazy. Let's go with Torians. They were enslaved by a stronger race but managed to overcome their oppressors with the power of courage and evolution (read: they had good morale and bred quickly), despite not being very smart tech-wise. Sounds familiar? Also, they can build Hot Springs. Hell yeah, I want a hot spring!

http://img682.imageshack.us/img682/7958/lp008races.png
And finally, other races. Let's go with nine - the more the better. I like surprises so I'm letting the universe pick them at random. I just hope we don't run into Torians. That'd be awkward.
The difficulty setting is Tough. It's the most fair one - AI opponents use the smartest scripts, and neither I nor everyone else has an economic boost or handicap. Like the GalCiv forumgoers say: "Tough is tough". But it gives me enough free room to play around a bit rather than min max the hell out of everything in order not to die instantly.


Boring stuff out of the way, let's get to space conquest! Welcome to planet Kamina, Kamina star system!
...

Kamina.
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/8807/lp009start.png
Wait, is that all we have for a fleet? Three civilian, non-combat ships? What happened with our giant flotilla?
I guess Viral was drunk and crashed it. Or pawned it off somewhere. Damn.

Okay, let's try to do with what we have. There are some features visible, asteroid fields and stuff. I'll describe them in a second. Overall, looks pretty cozy, huh? Home sweet home. But how significant it is on a galactic scale?

http://img688.imageshack.us/img688/4358/lp010bigmap.png
Not very, especially considering how positively humongous our space neighbourhood is. The red dot near the bottom of the map is our sphere of influence. It's nowhere as big as the whole galaxy yet, so we have lots of work to do. Other dots are, obviously, spheres of influence of other, non-Minor races. We know where they are because... we receive their signals? Space travellers? Ancient scriptures? Don't ask me, I'm only the supreme leader!

Enough of large scale maps that make you feel you're tiny and insignificant in a giant uncaring universe. Let's take a look at our beautiful home planet!
http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/1957/lp011planet.png
YEAH! A +700% research tile! Whatever building we put up there will generate 8 times the normal of research points. I guess it's ruins of Lordgenome's fortress, the man had some wild tech going on. Kamina is wild and virginal (hee hee, I was waiting to make that joke), surprisingly for a planet that 8 billion people call home. Let's change that and start building something really soon.
Oh yeah, and these green symbols near two of other tiles? They give a +100% farming bonus. Too bad it goes to waste - Kamina can already support 16 billion people and we really don't need more. The more people you have on a planet, the more discontent they are, and once population hits the magical number of 20 billion the Anti-Spirals return everyone becomes sulky and permanently on the verge of rioting. Not really worth the effort.

Time for progress! We must endlessly advance for the betterment of tomorrow. Or in more mundane terms, let's have our eggheads research something.
http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/8040/lp012research.png
32 weeks?! That's way too slow! I'll be old and crippled by the time you're finished! Let's do some supreme ruling around here and improve the situation.

http://img59.imageshack.us/img59/6432/lp013school.png
First, I'm building a research facility on that +700% tile. With our research tree, the basic facility is a... school. Don't laugh. The average Spiral is brave but not really that smart. Did I mention that? No? Well, now you know.
I'm buying it immediately because I need that school built NOW. It costs a bit but I have money to burn... so far at least. Galactic Manufacturing Corp offers the fairest deals - all money paid up front, no additional debts. I'm definitely not dealing with these Mitrosoft folk. They sound shady.

http://img688.imageshack.us/img688/9707/lp014production.png
Second part of my master plan - time to up the production capacity. I want my factories, schools, and everything else I didn't build yet to give out 100% of what they're capable of! Hire more people if you have to! Everyone who slacks off gets a Bright Slap! And a towel, so they don't feel too lost.
I'm also adjusting the tax rate into something that will strike a sensible balance between going broke and my people hating me forever. This balance is a hard thing to strike, and not always possible. I should be grateful that it's possible to maintain for at least one week (read: one turn).

And what do all my efforts result in?
http://img253.imageshack.us/img253/3976/lp015researchbetter.png
9 weeks! That's much better! Get to work everyone, maybe I'll manage not to die of old age before you're done.

I improved the situation of my empire without having to do more than move a finger in an authoritarian manner. Being the leader is FUN!

Time to broaden my horizons. Remember when I mentioned features of the Kamina star system? Mostly ugly floating space rocks, but if you look closely you notice that they're actually useful ugly floating space rocks. Take this white, frozen globe for example. It's a planet, and a habitable one to that! Time to send out one of my space vessels, which just happens to be a colony ship.
http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/597/lp016colony.png
Our first colony! Well, it's still the Kamina star system so we're not quite in deep space yet. Also, it's only class 4 (which means it has 4 building tiles available, one of which is automatically used by the capital - by comparison, Kamina is class 10). And since its population is small, it generates little tax money and actually costs me cash, throwing my budget off its stable equilibrium.

But hey, at least we expand! And now I'll have a place to visit if I want a winter vacation.

http://img503.imageshack.us/img503/2797/lp017anomaly.png
Here we have an anomaly. Or to use normal language: floating heap of space junk. Regardless, searching through it might reveal some goodies. That's what ships equipped with scanners are for. Too bad scanners aren't researched yet, but for some reason my flagship already has them. I really can't complain, at least it partially makes up for it not having any guns.
Anomalies appear all over the galaxy in a neverending stream. The flagship will be busy. It's also the best exploration vessel I have for now, so I'll try not to lose it. That, and it's the, y'know. Flag ship.

http://img407.imageshack.us/img407/4339/lp018asteroids.png
An asteroid field! The third of my vessels, a space miner, can construct mining facilities here. They will extract precious materials and beam them over to a planet of my choosing - but the greater the distance between the facility and the planet, the more resources get lost along the way. Still, the industry bonus is quite nifty. I like asteroids, the more I see of them the better.

(Note from my future self: oh, if I knew the irony of this statement at the time...)

So, we did a lot and it's still January 1st, year 2227, if unreliable Spiral calendars are to be believed. Let's send out my spaceships to explore the nearest star systems (visible on the map for my convenience). Well, with the space miner busy and the colony already deployed on Kamina the Second, that's more like one spaceship. But my spaceport is busy constructing... something, so expect to see more Spiral units in the near future.

And what'd you know, just two weeks of focused star exploring later (we're using hyperdrive, so take that relativity and time dilation!), I come across something really interesting!
http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/862/lp019jessuins.png
A habitable planet. Habitable? Hah, if only - it's already inhabited! It seems I stumbled upon a Minor Race.

Forced exposition:
Minor Races are not as developed as non-Minor ones. While they start with one planet each just like everyone else, they rarely if ever expand to further ones. Their research trees uniformly suck, their racial abilities are pathetic (with the exception of, for some reason, Economics), and they have no representative in the United Planets Council. They're easy to manipulate, intimidate or extort money or tech from. In short, they exist to be used and abused. Or, if you're a nice guy like I will try to be, they exist to be protected but still every once in a while given a deal that's very lucrative for you and not so much for them.
Wake up everyone, the exposition is over!

Who'd expect that intelligent life exists so close to my home planet, in my sphere of influence even! Well, we had genetically created Beastmen before... and the whole Anti-Spiral deal... but that's no reliable evidence! Anyway, apparently these aliens are known as the Jessuins. I'll abuse my position of authority and tell them "take me to your leader", right now.

http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/8053/lp020gibberish.png
Right... sorry, I don't speak Uglyface. Let's research a Universal Translator next.

In the next update - things stop going so smoothly!


Wait, I have a feeling I've already seen a GalCiv II LP whose first part ended with meeting gibberish-talking alie*TRANSMISSION ABORTED*

[Domochevsky]

Hm, consider me interested in this LP. Also: Needs more screenshot explanation. :smallbiggrin:

[chiasaur11]

Just remember:

If you see a race of small, furry rodents...

They can and will kill you if they get the chance.

[Cubey]

Hm, consider me interested in this LP. Also: Needs more screenshot explanation. :smallbiggrin:
Well, I could explain everything that happens on each screenshot, but I figured out it'd be, well, boring. But worry not - I will not leave the players confused, I will explain every visible thing as soon as it becomes important for the game. Like the Hitchhiker's Guide to Galaxy tells us: Don't panic!

Also, pay no attention to the real time clock in the upper right corner. It will never start being important, although if it says "5:30" or some other number like that then it may explain my poor tactical decisions or funny post formatting.


Just remember:

If you see a race of small, furry rodents...

They can and will kill you if they get the chance.

Why do you think I said things stop going smoothly in the next chapter?

[tonberrian]

http://img253.imageshack.us/img253/3976/lp015researchbetter.png


What is this "cultural domination"? I wish to know more.

[Cubey]

Cultural domination happens when at least 75% of the map is under your influence. It's kinda tiring, especially on larger maps, but a nice alternative for a "pacifist" run if you don't feel like going for the tech victory.

Culture is a fun thing in GalCiv II. Mining stations and even whole planets can join your side if your cultural influence is greater than the other side's. If you are familiar with Macross, you will like this concept.

EDIT: Ah, the Cultural Domination research item? It allows you to create space station modules that allow for better spread of your culture. I'll describe what exactly space stations do once I actually have one. But they're very useful.

[chiasaur11]

Well, I could explain everything that happens on each screenshot, but I figured out it'd be, well, boring. But worry not - I will not leave the players confused, I will explain every visible thing as soon as it becomes important for the game. Like the Hitchhiker's Guide to Galaxy tells us: Don't panic!

Also, pay no attention to the real time clock in the upper right corner. It will never start being important, although if it says "5:30" or some other number like that then it may explain my poor tactical decisions or funny post formatting.



Why do you think I said things stop going smoothly in the next chapter?

CURSE YOU Tom Francis!

[Malek]

Quick question: How did you activate that Galaxy Map thing? (the one showing globes of influence, I somehow missed that screen).

[IthilanorStPete]

Immense? My gosh, you're a masochist.

Anyways, what propulsion do you have up to? I try to rsch up to either Impulse or Ion Drive (whichever one's better, I forget) to help with the colony rush.

[Cubey]

Quick question: How did you activate that Galaxy Map thing? (the one showing globes of influence, I somehow missed that screen).

Just below the left corner of the map on the main interface you can see a plus and a minus button for resizing it, and also a small insignificant triangle. Click on that triangle.

That option is useful at the start because... well, I think everyone here knows why. If you know where the other civs are, you can start exterminating trading sooner. And in late game, this map looks great for showing areas of influence. It looks almost like a real map. Only in space.


Immense? My gosh, you're a masochist.

Anyways, what propulsion do you have up to? I try to rsch up to either Impulse or Ion Drive (whichever one's better, I forget) to help with the colony rush.

Yeah, I know. But I finished two games on Immense and let me tell you - once you experience the sheer scale of the biggest map, it's hard to get back to smaller ones. I'm planning to work on faster engines as soon as my first crucial techs are all researched, but so far we have only the standard Hyperdrive.

[Mercenary Pen]

Culture is a fun thing in GalCiv II. Mining stations and even whole planets can join your side if your cultural influence is greater than the other side's. If you are familiar with Macross, you will like this concept.

We aren't thinking the episode Viva Miriya are we? (macross saga episode 30)

[Cubey]

We aren't thinking the episode Viva Miriya are we? (macross saga episode 30)

That in particular, since it had a mining station an asteroid factory, but in general I mean the whole of Macross's idea of beating the enemy by out-Culturing them. Now if it worked on units in GalCiv II, and not only colonies and mining bases...

[Mercenary Pen]

That in particular, since it had a mining station an asteroid factory, but in general I mean the whole of Macross's idea of beating the enemy by out-Culturing them. Now if it worked on units in GalCiv II, and not only colonies and mining bases...

Okay, we need to put all our efforts into the development of intergalactic rock stars and shapechanging mecha starfighters

[Nerd-o-rama]

So that's why I kept getting my ass kicked by the Dreadlords in this game. I didn't research Totsugeki Love Heart.

Anyway Cubey, you're a massive dork. Let's see if you have more patience than me.

[Celesyne]

So, since I have no knowledge of this game Whatsoever, what kind of characters are available for us enterprising Playgrounders to be, before I throw my hat (or halo as the case may be) into the ring?

[chiasaur11]

So, since I have no knowledge of this game Whatsoever, what kind of characters are available for us enterprising Playgrounders to be, before I throw my hat (or halo as the case may be) into the ring?

Well, you can name ships, if I remember right.

Been a while.

[Tengu_temp]

So, since I have no knowledge of this game Whatsoever, what kind of characters are available for us enterprising Playgrounders to be, before I throw my hat (or halo as the case may be) into the ring?

You don't actually create any characters in this game. But we can pretend to be ministers of various affairs, ship captains, governors of planets, and other stuff like that. At least that's what I think.

EDIT: And agents. I completely forgot about those. Of course, this is one of the most dangerous positions...

[Brother Oni]

Okay, we need to put all our efforts into the development of intergalactic rock stars and shapechanging mecha starfighters

Developing Guitar Hero style control systems and sticking them on a crash course of Dragonforce "Through the Fire and the Flames" on Expert difficulty may help with their piloting too.

[chiasaur11]

You don't actually create any characters in this game. But we can pretend to be ministers of various affairs, ship captains, governors of planets, and other stuff like that. At least that's what I think.

Well, if Cubey does that a ground based military advisory position would be satisfying.

We'd be doing this one Brannigan style.

[Cubey]

Individual characters don't exist in this game like they do in, for example, X-Com. There's an exception for spies, but they're annonymous and one use only anyway, and you can't name them. But you can be a starship captain if you want, if you do just give me the proposal of your ship's (or giant robot's) name. Just to let you know, I have dibs on the flagship, and it'll be a while before I'll be able to create units that aren't cannon fodder. At least I'll make sure they're awesome cannon fodder.

So yeah, it's mostly a pseudo-forum RP thing. My puppet government is always looking to hire more ministers, advisors, governors, court jesters, etc, especially once we go all Star Democracy. Of course, since it's a puppet government then I have the right to ignore every orders you give to your ministry if I feel like it. Not that I'd ever do such a thing, of course not.

[Terraoblivion]

I claim the role of secretary of education. The children of the poor, unwashed spiral being masses will be properly educated in all the most important fields ever, such as pop cultural history, social history and theoretical physics, no need to waste time on the dull stuff like fine art or engineering.

[kamikasei]

Is there a position going for Ghost in the Interstellarnet AI? Cause that'd be neat.

[Mercenary Pen]

Developing Guitar Hero style control systems and sticking them on a crash course of Dragonforce "Through the Fire and the Flames" on Expert difficulty may help with their piloting too.

Only if you build an electric-guitar shaped super heavy beam cannon, possibly in a similar shape to the main cannon of the Wing Zero mecha from Gundam Wing.

[chiasaur11]

I got command of the army, if it's permissible.

Mechs and ships, someone else's game. I want to order wave upon wave of demented avenger to the slaughter face to face.

[Cubey]

And we have our first members of the staff! Make sure you keep them kids well fed, not forced to drill nuts for sustenance. As for the army, good thing the Spirals have so many Beastmen citizens. They're quite ferocious in a fight. Especially the koala-men. You don't want to mess with these.

No idea what the AI ghost would be supposed to do though. A disembodied advisor?

Finally, as far as super heavy guitar shaped beam cannons are concerned... stop reading my notes! I was supposed to reveal that superweapon after I reach Massive Scale Building, not before.

[Tavar]

I'll be minister of Science, if that's okay. Will try to live up to Leeron's example...

[kamikasei]

No idea what the AI ghost would be supposed to do though. A disembodied advisor?

Or an antagonist, or bored chessmaster, or force of nature. The possibilities are endless when you've a trillion limbs and no body.

[chiasaur11]

Or an antagonist, or bored chessmaster, or force of nature. The possibilities are endless when you've a trillion limbs and no body.

Possibilities that are still right out:

Being better than Durandal.

[Cubey]

Or an antagonist, or bored chessmaster, or force of nature. The possibilities are endless when you've a trillion limbs and no body.

Aha! Now I'll know who to blame for all my misfortunes.
And trust me, there will be things to blame for.


I'll be minister of Science, if that's okay. Will try to live up to Leeron's example...

You mean in technical genius, or in fabulousness? Won't be easy either way.

[Tavar]

Both, of course. And, though I may be doomed to failure, I must at least try.

[Mercenary Pen]

I'll go for Head of the Defence-Procurement agency. Which means I get to organise the contracts to develop and build all your new weapons and vessels of war (in which case, it'll be just as well that I could work out the weapons you wanted even before you had the tech to start building them...)

[Cubey]

Chapter II: Asteroid Angst

Today I was rudely awoken from my peaceful slumber (4 AM - 2 PM) by a message. Apparently some race has finished a Secret Project.
http://img42.imageshack.us/img42/9311/lp021achievement.png
Who the hell are Thalans? First time I hear about them. Well, nothing to worry about. Secret Projects are special buildings, but unlike Galactic Achievements that can exist in numbers of 1 (one, uno, eins) in the whole galaxy, a Secret Project is limited to one per race. So it didn't lock any construction options for me.

Although at the time I was ignorant of Thalans, soon I would know them better than I ever would have wished for...

At the same time, my flagship was discovering more of this part of the galaxy's most common feature - asteroid fields.
http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/8616/lp022asteroidseverywher.png
There's so many of them, you'd suspect a huge and horrific war occured here some time ago, ripping whole planets into floating rocks. And if you're familiar with Gurren Lagann, you know that something like this really did happen.

Wonderings about compatibility of TTGL and GalCiv canons are interrupted by my starport's workers getting off their asses and actually doing something useful for a change. Behold, the first unit christened during my reign!
http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/3950/lp023scout.png
Hello there little guy! Scouts are tiny and unarmed, although equipped with additional basic sensors and life support. It makes them an ideal exploration unit for early stages of gameplay - reliable and cheap. I only can't help but wonder about one thing... Scout 116? What happened to units 1 to 115? Is there something I should know that nobody told me about? Yet another mystery remains unresolved.

http://img252.imageshack.us/img252/6633/lp024moreachievement.png
I order the Scout to get trekkin' and soon receive additional messages. More races that I never heard of finish their Secret Projects. Not only that, but Thalans finish their first Galactic Achievement. No need to complain about it though, it's a Thalan-specific building so as before, the option isn't locked for me as I didn't really have it in the first place. But the whole thing still hurts my ambition - I can't get behind, gotta build something secret and project-like soon!

The Scout's exploration soon yields results. It finds a habitable planet, located in a system named Gandalf for some reason (only a lousy class 4 again, setting up a colony there is low priority), and more importantly - a resource!
http://img682.imageshack.us/img682/5209/lp025resource.png
Unlike asteroid fields, resources require actual starbases to be mined. Starbases are built by Constructors, and can be further upgraded by the same unit type. The more upgrades a mining starbase has, the greater the benefit it provides for the whole empire - in this case, research efficiency. Now, speaking of research, what are my scientists working on?

http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/2131/lp026weknowscience.png
Woah. Took you guys long enough to actually put some real science into Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Let's hope it's for the best. Also, this tech unlocks many others, among them Stellar Cartography. It allows me to detect where all the planets are before I actually explore the space with my units (without the upgrade you can only see locations of the stars), and it takes only one week to research! Let's go with that.

One week later:

It's... it's horrible. This galaxy really is a ruin left after a huge, all-devastating battle. Take a look at this.
http://img190.imageshack.us/img190/3188/lp027mapdespair.png
This is but a small part of the galactic map. The large dots are suns, the small ones planets. You can clearly see that only some stars have planets around them, and rarely in numbers greater than one or two. Not only that, most (and I mean most - 80 to 90%) of these planets are completely uninhabitable and no matter how good our terraforming technology gets, will remain so until the end of the universe. Or at least until I die from old age, which is just as bad for me.

And the situation is not like that in just this tiny part of the galaxy. It's like this everywhere. EVERYWHERE!

The universe suddenly becomes a lot less hospitable a place to live in. With even lifeless rock planets a rarity, the life-supporting ones become real treasures. Yes, even the crappy class 4 Gandalf. Prioritizing construction of a colony ship NOW. Soon, it leaves dock and flies towards the crappy-turned-golden planet with 250 million of eager colonists on board. ETA: No more than a few weeks, and good.

But in the meantime, it's the Spirals' turn to complete a Galactic Achievement of their own.
http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/9958/lp028ourachievement.png
The Aquatic Transport Station is tech tree-specific, like almost all earlygame Achievements. This is yet another reason why it'd be awkward to find Torians - both of our civilizations would have to compete against each other, trying to be the first to raise a building that's supposed to be a freebie.
Okay, but what does Aquatic Transport Station DO?
http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/7677/lp029aquatictransport.png
It increases range of my ships (all of them) and improves economy (read: tax revenue) of the planet it was built on by a tiny bit. Pretty nice. Not great, but nice enough. Since the planet-specific bonus is so insubstantial, is there any wonder why I constructed this on the backwater of Kamina II rather than wasting precious space of my homeworld? I think not.

http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/4513/lp030altarians.png
At the same time, my flagship detects an alien vessel. It's not Jessuins', and it's definitely not ours. One thing for sure, it doesn't look hostile. Not that it has any weapons to attack us with. Who are these guys now? I am in desperate need of answers! And, unexpectantly enough, soon I receive one.

http://img32.imageshack.us/img32/1817/lp031altarianshello.png
It's the Altarians! This strangely human-like race is advanced scientifically and also, as you can see, they're total hippies. At least that's how they want us to view them. Underestimate them and you'll find yourself facing a technologically superior and suddenly not-so-friendly-anymore opponent. But that's only a hypothetical future situation, so far the Altarians have only unarmed scout vessels. Well, so do I, but nobody has to know that.

http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/6972/lp032altaria.png
And here's the Altarian homeworld! A beautiful planet (higher class than Kamina - I smell foul play), protected by a brave armada of absolutely defenseless spaceships. I told my scientists to figure out the extremely difficult art of trade: apparently everything becomes hellishly complicated once you convert it to space scaled size. As soon as they're done, I'm sending a freighter to Altaria to do some trading. The distance is just perfect - long enough that the trip becomes really lucrative, short enough that the freighter can actually reach the planet. And it's about time, the Spiral funds are thinning out with each passing week.

http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/9693/lp033thalans.png
Gaah! I didn't see that coming. A huge mantis-like... thing appeared on my screen. Apparently it's an ambassador of the Thalan civilization - the one that was happily erecting an Achievement after Achievement not so long ago. Well, nice to finally see you people face to face(?). But the question is, how did you find this frequency? I didn't come anywhere close your sphere of influence yet.

http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/6855/lp034nooo.png

...

What?

You gotta be kidding me!

The Thalans took Gandalf I. They snatched it when I wasn't looking. Right from under my nose. See the red spacecraft near the planet? That's my colony ship. It was one turn away from landing. It was one TILE away from landing! But they go "lol, finders keepers brah!" and steal it right from beyond my reach. The galaxy is desolate. I will spend months, maybe years, trying to find another habitable planet. And then I'll have to pray that nobody colonises it before I do. But hey, at least there's a lot of asteroids around, right? That's fun and useful, right?

In the void of space, no one can hear you scream. Good, because I feel like screaming. Right. Now.

NOOOOOOOOOOO!!

In the next update: the situation becomes better and worse at the same time!

[Flickerdart]

The strategy I usually employ is mass-building a dozen or so Colony ships and shooting them in random directions. I guess that doesn't work so well when there are so few planets that Class 4s become useful or important. Hell, I don't even colonize the in-system class 4 until I have to.

[Cubey]

I don't do that most of the time, unless a colony ship got one upped by someone and its destination got colonized before it could get there - then I send it exploring. I usually just keep several spare ones, on the orbit of the planet that is the closest to where I suspect the frontier is. But on this map it's just a waste. I wasn't joking when I described how desolate it is.

I played the game a bit more than this LP shows, to have a buffer in case I won't be able to play for a while. So, this might be a spoiler but I'll assure everyone: eventually (about Chapter IV) I did find some habitable planets. It took a while though. For about an in-character year, the only two colonies I had were Kamina and Kamina II.

[Fri]

I still remember my first (somewhat) successful game of GalCiv2. Only got 3 planet in a large galaxy, with Drangin empire as my neighbour. It was rather epic.

I'm bad at strategy games since I'm extremely bad at multitasking, but still, I love this game. Rarely played anything other than large or medium map, and never even tried immense game.

Hey, may I cameo as a pilot in this game? You can put me in one of the ship or let me transfer ships as ships got destroyed/upgraded, up to you.

[Cubey]

Okay Fri. From henceforth you become a pilot, always getting the best assignments - the weakest fighter in the first wave against superior enemy forces, an experimental unit that tests if having 1 beam weapon and 12 shields is a good design (it isn't, especially if your enemy uses missiles or railguns), and so on. But don't worry, you'll have Patrick Colaseur's blessing and you'll never die, always managing to survive... somehow. Rejoice!

Also, everyone else who wanted a position in my government but I didn't respond to them yet - you're hired. Make yourself home. Just don't touch the latte in the superior leader fridge. It's mine.

[The Glyphstone]

Dibs on chief diplomat, officially the first person to make contact with each new race. Unfortunately that involves a lot of traveling, and I spend most of my travel time drinking away the pain of having to learn so many different languages that do horrible things to my vocal chords.

[Mercenary Pen]

Dibs on chief diplomat, officially the first person to make contact with each new race. Unfortunately that involves a lot of traveling, and I spend most of my travel time drinking away the pain of having to learn so many different languages that do horrible things to my vocal chords.

Nope, we re-build your genetic code every single time to give you the right vocal chords for the job... (for some of us are slightly evil)

[Cubey]

Listen everyone - due to funky internet connection I wasn't able to make an update today. Expect something new tomorrow noon or early afternoon (European time). I might even update twice a day if I have enough material to do so.

[Tavar]

Nope, we re-build your genetic code every single time to give you the right vocal chords for the job... (for some of us are slightly evil)

Actually, that sounds like and almost spirally thing to do.

[Artanis]

Wait, the LP has started, and I missed the beginning? Aww... :smallfrown:


Can I be Minister of Blowing Things Up? I want to laugh hysterically as we carpet-nuke somebody's planets :smallbiggrin:


Also, I notice that the Drath are in the game. I normally don't like using Super Warrior because it's so powerful in the right hands, but it's going to come in damned handy when you're embroiled in a 7-way war in three...two...one...

[Fri]

Okay Fri. From henceforth you become a pilot, always getting the best assignments - the weakest fighter in the first wave against superior enemy forces, an experimental unit that tests if having 1 beam weapon and 12 shields is a good design (it isn't, especially if your enemy uses missiles or railguns), and so on. But don't worry, you'll have Patrick Colaseur's blessing and you'll never die, always managing to survive... somehow. Rejoice!


You killed all of the suspense :smallbiggrin:

[Mercenary Pen]

You killed all of the suspense :smallbiggrin:

You do realise he carefully forgot to mention the one battle you won't be coming back from- except that we create a clone of you from genetic material in your severed hand (yep, you don't get disintegrated that time).

[Cubey]

Or we'll keep him around as a head in a jar. It'll be TTGL meets Futurama!

Also, we don't carpet bomb planets. In GalCiv, you use asteroids and space junk. Sounds familiar? Add in a random space colony and we have Gundam.

[Mercenary Pen]

Or we'll keep him around as a head in a jar. It'll be TTGL meets Futurama!

Also, we don't carpet bomb planets. In GalCiv, you use asteroids and space junk. Sounds familiar? Add in a random space colony and we have Gundam.

So, you create a carpet out of asteroids (this will take a fair bit of time and expertise, because weaving asteroids is not for the faint hearted) and use that to bomb the planet...

[Blayze]

Minister of Lasers position for me, please. I'm gonna go Attenborough on the enemy's collective behinds.

[Cubey]

Chapter III: Wherein Cubey finds himself frustrated and overworked

I will be fair with you - I really thought about abandoning my post. About leaving this void, lifeless galaxy behind and heading for an alternate universe, one less hostile to anything that requires food and oxygen. And one that, hopefully, would have less Thalan planet thieves.

But is this really how you deal with troubles? Would Simon or Kamina give up at the slightest sight of difficulty? Of course not. They would face the challenge head on, and maybe they would lose - but hell, they would at least TRY. And I am going to do the same. Witness my efforts, as they lead to either glory or downfall! I will keep this ship afloat until the bitter end! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?!

Oh yeah, and it helps that I have new government officials whom I can blame for all the bad stuff that's inevitably going to happen. Not that I'd ever do that, of course.

Okay, first things first. Range of my spacecraft is limited - this isn't good, can't take over the whole galaxy if I can't reach everywhere yet. Each unit has its own individual range rating, depending on equipped modules, size and other stuff like that, but they all operate under the same principle: can't go more than X parsecs away from the nearest supporting object. These objects include planets and starbases. Trying to find a habitable planet didn't work that well for me so far, let's get a starbase instead!

http://img503.imageshack.us/img503/9048/lp0301constructor.png
Like I mentioned already, starbases are built by constructors. And here's one! Looks pretty, doesn't it? Because for me, it looks like sweet victory. No napalm involved.
http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/1067/lp0302constructor.png

Let's get building! And our first starbase is...
http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/9724/lp0303starbase.png
http://img441.imageshack.us/img441/714/lp0304mining.png
A miner. It doesn't provide extra range for me, but I need the research bonus. 'Sides, can't afford to get the resource stolen by Thalans as well.

All planets in my flagship's vincinity and range are discovered already (and of course, none of them are habitable). Time to explore some anomalies. I can't be bothered to point the location of each and everyone manually, so I'll let the crew do some anomaly surveying on their own.
http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/3329/lp0305autosurvey.png

Which has an unexpected side effect.
http://img695.imageshack.us/img695/9428/lp0306surveyhax.png
What, you're saying the closest anomaly is... over there? But we didn't explore that region of space yet! How can you be so sure? Well, whatever. I don't know what kind of cheating, parlour tricks or divine omens you use, but that anomaly better be there.

One problem solved, thirty thousand to go. Don't worry, I'll deal with them one by one, cutting into private time if need be. Sleep is for the weak. But not video games. Nobody will force me to abandon video games.
My units are horribly slow. Actually, they're faster than possible by Einsteinian physics, but since the galaxy is so friggin' huge it's still too slow. Let's fix that.
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/4337/lp0307drive.png
The Impulse Drive tech takes a while to research, but it'll make all my units substantially faster. I'm not talking about new engines being available for craft designs (but it gives that too), but a raw bonus boost to everyone's speed. Maybe my colony ships will stop getting late.

http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/228/lp0308iondrive.png
Also, the Ion Drive I had to research in order to get Impulse unlocks an engine that's cheaper and smaller than the already used Hyperdrive engine, while still being just as fast. Re-designing all my units that currently use hyperdrive is the only logical thing to do.

The drive research was as slow as your favorite supreme leader on a Sunday morning. But the situation changes now! Time to present to everyone the details behind a super project, one that I kept so secret that nobody knew about it until now, not even the workers responsible for constructing it!
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/3398/lp0309techcapital.png
That's right, a whole capital built in secret. We have some very secretive engineers there... or alternatively, Spirals are easy to trick. One way or another, this project provides a +100% boost to research conducted on the planet. I'd build it everywhere, but you know... super project, one per civilization limit, stuff like that. But this in conjuction with Kamina's Incredible School of Research (now with 8 times the smarts!) should help me get out of intellectual dumps a little.

Remember how my flagship's phony seer predicted an anomaly would be straight in the middle of an unexplored sector?
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/1916/lp0310anomaly.png
Well, what'd you know, it was true! And it's money - get! I need money, the treasury's getting empty. I'll work on fixing that next.

http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/4087/lp0311driveresearched.png
The project's done already? Why, thank you Crow T Robot's sister! I didn't realize it'd be finished so soon. Better check exactly how smarter did the Spirals become. And nothing is smarter than... graphs!
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/9639/lp0312researchgraph.png
The red line represents us. I think you can figure out the precise moment our Tech Capital was built. Lordgenome's disembodied head is very happy for us. The graph served one other useful function - it made me realize my reign lasted for 43 weeks so far. That's almost a year! Time's flying, huh?

Time is flying, so are funds out of my personal national money reserves. I need an extra monetary boost, and here's just the thing that will provide it.
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/2590/lp0313willarrivein20tur.png
A freight! I'm sending it out to sell hot Spiral goods (drills, Gurren Lagann minis, fanservice photos, etc) to the most distant planet it can reach. Remember - more distance means more money. But it also means more time until the spaceship gets there. ETA: 20 weeks.

Let's it a long-term solution.

Why do I have a lingering feeling there's something I am missing? Something... important and international, that's going to happen very soon?
http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/3985/lp0314meetingsoon.png
That's why.

All sentient races of the galaxy belong to the United Planets Council. Well, make that all non-Minor races, because no one cares about the smallfry. And since the Spirals are playing hosts, races I didn't make contact yet are out of the loop too. It's not very fair but hey! That's space democracy for you. My system works much better - one man, one vote. I am the man and I have the vote.
Anyway, the Council gathers each year to vote on important decisions that may change the fate of the whole galaxy forever. And this year's law to vote on is...
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/8425/lp0315meeting.png
Not very important. Mining facilities rarely revolt unless it is because of an other civ's planet being right next to them in the first place, so this is a waste of time. Regardless of that, the two other civilization leaders give me the Stare, like if their lives depended on my decision. I believe in everyone's rights to revolt if they feel like it, so I'm picking "no". The voice distribution is more or less equal, so I'll get outvoted only if both of my rivals decide to vote for yes.

But both of them pick no anyway. Oh well. Told you it was a waste of time.

http://img526.imageshack.us/img526/7301/lp0316thala.png
And I find the Thalan homeworld! I am tempted to take it over, like they did with Gandalf - but I doubt 12 billion Thalan citizens will just leave if I kindly tell them to. Also, notice how this planet actually has a unit dedicated to defense in its orbit and not just a scout or two. Nice initiative bugs guys. Just remember to put some guns on it the next time.

I receive news about another Minor Race!
http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/3871/lp0317darkyorbuildsomet.png
The Dark Yor are an offshoot of Yor, the classic "robots gone rogue and very evil" race. Dark Yor are even more evil than them, but also even less competent. Still, apparently they're competent enough to construct their own Super Project.

When will I stop getting info about civilizations I didn't meet in person yet? It's annoying. I wouldn't mind meeting a race that has some importance for a change. And look, my wish is granted!

http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/227/lp0318humans.png
I don't like this greeting. I mean, she's telling the truth, right - but she could've been nicer about it.

Also, wait. You people are humans? What are we then? Who are the Spirals? The answer is simple - Humans AND Beastmen, bitch! And probably some weirder races too. Brains in jars or some crazy stuff like that.

http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/2156/lp0319earth.png
Welcome to the Human homeworld, Earth (wait, wasn't Kamina Earth, just renamed? Don't think too hard about it - it's just a show, you should really just relax). I see creating dedicated defender ships and not bothering to put any weapons on them is the new fad.

I get interrupted again.
"Sir, more news about races we didn't meet in person yet."
"I think I told you not to mention that to me."
"But Sir, this... this is different."
http://img696.imageshack.us/img696/6012/lp0320uhoh.png
"..."
"Sir, you look pale. I can see it even under the helmet."

The Nightmare is here. A race of tiny, fluffy rabbit-like beings. Absolutely murderous rabbit-like beings. They come to murder, rape, pillage and destroy - the Snathi are here.

Next time: a big update! And soon, too! Hopefully.

[chiasaur11]

Snathi AND Jenna Casey?

GREAT FRANCIS"S GHOST!

We're caught between two races of obviously genocidal maniacs.

I recommend a simple, elegant, and noble strategy. We develop an even faster hyperdrive, conquer both planets with armies of troops, and then force the survivors to preemptively declare peace with us.

Our victory on the ground is all but guaranteed. We can use the corpses of the first waves of troops as human shields, a tactic our enemies have no counter for.

[Cubey]

A beautiful plan. I assume you're going to charge in the first line, like all valorous (and usually very dead) commanders should do?

But unfortunately there's also that thing about Planetary Invasion research... but let's not spoil too much preemptively.

I'll add the list of my flunkies trusted advisors to the first post. Doing it now.

[chiasaur11]

A beautiful plan. I assume you're going to charge in the first line, like all valorous (and usually very dead) commanders should do?



I would, but then who would inspire the troops?

I say we send Kif in first.

[Cubey]

I say we send Kif in first.

You're saying the first line will consist of only one soldier?

Sold! To the man in the power armor.

[DeafnotDumb]

I bags the position of Head of Research and Delvelopment, or as it is otherwise known, That Guy Who Adds Drills and Dakka onto Absolutely Everything Whether They Need It Or Not. I'm going to need some victims volenteers to test my prototypes out.

I suggest Kif.

[Domochevsky]

Hum. I'm having issues with your picture hoster. Some of those shots aren't turning up or only do so after a couple of site reloads. :S

Otherwise quite entertaining. :smallsmile:

[Cubey]

I use imageshack. It's very popular so it may work slowly at times. Just wait and reload if necessary.

@DeafnotDumb:
Truth to be told, I already have a science guy, AND a weapons guy. You can be responsible for testing though. Just remember - all great scientists test their inventions on themselves first.

[DeafnotDumb]

Sure, sure. Can I still have Kif to test the weapons on?

[Cubey]

Kif? You mean our first line of assault?

Sure, you can have him. I'm sure the tests will make him stronger and thus our army will be truly invincible!

[Cubey]

Chapter IV: How to overuse the word "starbase"

As some of you may have noticed from looking at various unimportant parts of pictures I posted, the current finances of the Spirals are bad. Really bad - we were down to a three digit number. Well, now it's a two digit one. Less than one hundred bc (which stands for billions of credits - we're talking epic scale here, remember? Or alternatively and more likely, that's future inflation for you. Even ice cream costs like 250 million now). Desperate action is necessary to prevent the empire from going flat under!

What action we're talking about? An action simple enough. Let's play? More like let's trade!
http://img683.imageshack.us/img683/6415/lp0401letstrade.png
Universities are an invention of Terra - the next step in making sure our citizens aren't so wild, unwashed and stupid. Some of them can even count up to one hundred now. Anyway, universities an upgrade to schools, so it's what we have instead of actual scientific buildings. They're not as good but as you can see - other races are still interested in them! Or at least the silly Thalans are.

Selling around this tech and a few choice other ones (all useless), and my funding problems are gone. Diplomacy is FUN!

Soon thereafter, we discover a class 15 planet! Unfortunately, a defensive armada of unarmed scouts tells me it's already colonized. Populated by idiots, but colonized nevertheless.
http://img515.imageshack.us/img515/1074/lp0402darkyorplanet.png
And a week after, the owners themselves speak up!
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/7123/lp0403darkyorjerks.png
Ah, so that's where the Dark Yor were hiding. As you can see, not only they're pure evil but also kind of jerks. Let's do a short conquest math quiz!

Planetary class 15 planet + located right at the limit of my ships' range + populated by evil bastards + precious little defenders = ....... (put your answer here)
I'll let everyone calculate the result by themselves. Hint: Chiasaur and Kif will be busy.

Remember when I was talking about constructors earlier? Well, when nobody was looking I stealthily sent one as far towards the center of the galaxy as possible. Gotta increase my ships' ground... erm, space coverage as much as possible. It took a while for the constructor to reach its destination, but now it's finally there!
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/7773/lp0404constructorset.png
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/8334/lp0405buildingstarbase.png
What kind of a starbase am I interested in? It's basically in the middle of nowhere, built for no purpose other than to increase my units' range. So... let's go with Military.
http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/1623/lp0406militarystarbase.png
All done. That's some quick construction. Note how when you're not building on a resource, you can build different types of starbases than when you do (when a mining starbase is the only option). Non-mining starbases have a sphere of influence around them, and everything caught in that sphere gets a bonus - depending on modules you installed. Each starbase type has different modules available, although some like defensive stations are available for all.

My exposition was so boring, another constructor built a second starbase in the meantime!
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/7617/lp0407economystarbase.png
This should provide a boost to nearby planets' production and research output. It also increases money I make from trade, once I establish any actual trade routes.

A few weeks later, I receive an unexpected transmission.
"Captain Celesyne here, of colony ship Macross Gurren. I report an important discovery."
Ah, so that's where he went! It also explains what happened to the vessel sent to colonize Gandalf I, the one that was... twitch twitch... upstaged by the Thalans. I recall sending it out for exploration, but the memory from that period is cloudy, partially obscured by red haze of fury and partially by black haze of despair. That wasn't a nice time to be the supreme leader. Well, let's hear what the colonists are up to.
"It's a class 12 planet, Sir."

Is that a joke? He must be kidding!
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/3124/lp0408newplanet.png
He's not kidding.

The planet really is there. Leda I, so beautiful and empty. In fact, it's a bit too empty - my experts classify it as Barren, and unable to sustain life until I research appropriate technology. That's both bad and good news. Good because it means nobody will snatch the planet for some time unless they have the required tech (they don't). Bad, because both required inventions (Extreme Colonization, which does nothing in itself other than allowing research of several other techs, Barren World Colonization being one of them - and that's what I need) are research-intensive and require many weeks to finish each project. But don't be discouraged! Approach science with courage, and with courage the science shall be conquered! Or something like that.

And almost immediately after, another planet in a totally different part of the galaxy is discovered. Hadrian I, Hadrian system - class 8, habitable (eventually) but empty, classification: Barren as well. I definitely know what to focus my research on once the current project's completed. And what is the current project? You'll discover soon enough.

Several important things happen almost right after another in a short period of time. First: my freighters arrive on alien worlds, establishing trade routes and bringing a much needed financial boost for my coffers. Unfortunately, I forgot to screencap this important event. Second: I'm improving my economic starbase. It was floating in space nigh-uselessly until this point, so I've ordered several constructors built to move out and upgrade it as much as humanly possible. You know the drill: one constructor, one module.
http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/3466/lp0409starbaseupgrade.png
Third: remember Thalans? Yeah, thought so. Who could forget them? Well, they've finished another secret project.
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/7021/lp0410morethalanbuildin.pngActually, it's a unique Trade Good - the difference is that unlike buildings, Trade Goods can be given to other civilizations. Nobody does that though, because the bonus they provide is quite nifty. Which is bad news for me - I really wanted these Diplomatic Translators (they make international communication easier, which translates into a diplomatic bonus - see what I did there?), and now I won't be able to have them, ever.

Spirals and Thalans, we didn't really have a history of friendship and cooperation. And it's getting worse with each passing month. I wonder where it's all going.

But there's a silver lining to every black, one-upping, Thalan-shaped cloud. The same week an important discovery was made!
http://img683.imageshack.us/img683/6990/lp0411republic.png
Yes, I want to change the form of government to Republic. Now, don't get me wrong - I am still the supreme leader. This only means local colony magistrates have slightly more power, and can actually do some things on their own instead of me having to tell them to do every little thing by myself. Which saves time for me and boosts the local economies, resulting for more money for everyone else. Excellent! A situation with no downsides, for once!
http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/7903/lp0412republicvoting.png
Forget I said anything. Apparently I can be the supreme leader only if the population demands it. And the key to that is happiness - an unhappy crowd is a crowd that seeks people responsible, and for some reason it will try to blame me for its discontent. Like if I, the supreme leader, could do anything to make the people happier!

Oh wait, I can lower taxes.
http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/6026/lp0413votingwon.png
Problem solved!

In the next update: dragons, giant robots and socioeconomic changes!

But first, a mildly spoilerrific (a few turns in the future) overview of my sphere of influence's nearest surroundings. Guess what's the most common Object in Space? Firefly doesn't count. It's not nearly common enough. Still flyin' tho.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/2286/lp0416mapoverview.png
That's right. Asteroids. Asteroids everywhere.

[Blayze]

So when does the "claim every asteroid in enemy Influence" mining network get started?

Also, a request: Initiate Operation Terror Star. Let's blow that invading Influence bubble out of the sky!

[Cubey]

So when does the "claim every asteroid in enemy Influence" mining network get started?
That won't work so well, they'll just turncoat over to the other civ's side. The law makes mining bases impossible to subvert only if you have a planet closer to them than the opposing side does.

Also, a request: Initiate Operation Terror Star. Let's blow that invading Influence bubble out of the sky!
I'd rather reconquer it. Remember, the planet is mine. It's just that the Thalans had the nerve to be there first.

Also, let me get this straight. You expect me to kill Gandalf?
(Yes, this game has an awesome star system name generator. There's a script ensuring that if a star called Tycho is generated, so is a star called Gabe, and I think this script is on by default.)

[chiasaur11]

That won't work so well, they'll just turncoat over to the other civ's side. The law makes mining bases impossible to subvert only if you have a planet closer to them than the opposing side does.

I'd rather reconquer it. Remember, the planet is mine. It's just that the Thalans had the nerve to be there first.

Also, let me get this straight. You expect me to kill Gandalf?
(Yes, this game has an awesome star system name generator. There's a script ensuring that if a star called Tycho is generated, so is a star called Gabe, and I think this script is on by default.)

Which is great, but I'm torn between liking the Gabe star naming, and wanting Durandal instead.

Perhaps both somewhere in the galaxy would be optimal.

[Cubey]

If I ever see a Durandal anywhere on the map, I'll let you know first.

And then I'll shiver and prepare for bad days.

[Terraoblivion]

I am calling a cabinet meeting. As secretary of education i have grave misgivings about our supreme leader declaring universities useless and insisting that dedicated students trying their hardest to learn the skills they care about is less useful than a narrowminded focus on those with an immediate practical application. Who can say when study into the ramifications in the symbolism of how shouting the name of the greatest king of Hawaii can call forth the most powerful attack in the universe in Dragonball Z will become of the utmost importance? As government it is our responsibility to encourage such vital research!

Also i see that Blayze is that clown guy who loves hitting buttons and watching beams go off.

[Cubey]

No, no. You have misunderstood me.

Universities are not useless per se. They are, however, useless for races other than the Spirals - who have the technology to construct buildings that offer greater technological advantage on paper, but also as a side effect are more soulless and offer boring and pragmatic knowledge.

Well, the races in question seem more than willing to buy blueprints of my buildings, so maybe even they see value of really spirited education over their own research facilities. There may be hope for them yet.

[chiasaur11]

Why do we even have an education minister, anyway?

I mean, sure, some scientists may be important for some reason, at some point in the future, but the future isn't the present.

And in the present we don't need any fancy pants "diplomas" or "educations" to know how to take a bullet for you commanding officer.

[Mercenary Pen]

Why do we even have an education minister, anyway?

Education finds new and interesting ways to kill the enemy. Killing the enemy is something I expect you would consider a good thing

Also, we don't appear to have researched any decent weapons yet.

[chiasaur11]

Education finds new and interesting ways to kill the enemy. Killing the enemy is something I expect you would consider a good thing

Also, we don't appear to have researched any decent weapons yet.

I see your point. On the other hand, cavemen weren't educated, and they killed the dinosaurs, the most educated empire in the history of Spain.

Admit it. I hit your bull's eye, making the rest of the dominoes fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."

[LordZarth]

Anyone want to play a Galciv succession game?

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

I see your point. On the other hand, cavemen weren't educated, and they killed the dinosaurs, the most educated empire in the history of Spain.

Admit it. I hit your bull's eye, making the rest of the dominoes fall like a house of cards. Checkmate."

I want to quote this. Now. Permissi?

[chiasaur11]

I want to quote this. Now. Permissi?

Sure. I stole most of it from Zapp Brannigan anyway.

[Cubey]

See, this is why I am the supreme leader and you are my general and not the other way around.

Teaching is important. We have a lot to learn from past experiences and exploits - that courage triumphs everything, all problems can be solved by liberal administration of drills, the logical thing to do when encountering an enemy that can dodge all of your attacks is to hit every point in the universe simultaneously, and even things that have a 0% chance of succeeding will succeed if you try hard enough.

These are important, realistic and scientific life lessons. The more Spirals learn about them, the better.

Also, side note - any preference on what type of weapons we want to focus on most? For those unfamiliar with GalCiv, the three categories are:
Beams (most balanced)
Missiles (strongest, but large and expensive)
Railguns (weakest, but cheap)
I tend to go for missiles. Which in this case means: drill rockets! But I'm open for other opinions.

[Tavar]

I think missiles represent our drills the best.

[chiasaur11]

Any of our enemies have shields of any kind yet?

Might be worth avoiding what our foes got defenses against.

[Celesyne]

Woohoo, I got a bit appearance, I'm a puny little colony ship captain, but at least I have good news! Now if only I wasn't late to everything all the damnable time...

[SlyGuyMcFly]

Also, side note - any preference on what type of weapons we want to focus on most? For those unfamiliar with GalCiv, the three categories are:
Beams (most balanced)
Missiles (strongest, but large and expensive)
Railguns (weakest, but cheap)
I tend to go for missiles. Which in this case means: drill rockets! But I'm open for other opinions.

Missiles! Nothin like some a good Missile Massacre, Boss. Not that I'm an expert or anythin, just a lowly pilot's opinion.

[Fri]

Sir, I prefer that we try to learn about the effectivity of the various weapons first (compared to our ene... neighbor's defense) before we put all of our money into one type of weapon. Since, yaknow, I'll be the one that pilot them and eventhough it'll be awesome, dogfighting with only missile when everyone maxes their point defense won't be really fun.

Though, it's a bit of catch 22, since we must built them first before we can test them... Uh, I'll leave this to our smarter people, I'm just here to pilot thing, blow stuff up, and generally, being totally awesome.

Watch out galaxy, the ace of the spirals is coming.

[Mercenary Pen]

Watch out galaxy, the ace of the spirals is coming.

Yeah, but so are you, that should average things out just a little:smalltongue:

[DeafnotDumb]

Also, side note - any preference on what type of weapons we want to focus on most? For those unfamiliar with GalCiv, the three categories are:
Beams (most balanced)
Missiles (strongest, but large and expensive)
Railguns (weakest, but cheap)
I tend to go for missiles. Which in this case means: drill rockets! But I'm open for other opinions.

I say we use all of them. At once. With extra drills and lasers. And giant robots. While scearming manly hot-blooded threats at your enemy at the top of your voice.

Okay, maybe there's a reason I'm in charge of testing weapons and not delveloping them.

[Tengu_temp]

Watch out galaxy, the ace of the spirals is coming.

You know what that reminds me of?
CAPTAIN FRI, DEFENDER OF KAMINA! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJ3sMdOsT-k)

[Cubey]

Of course I plan to use whatever weapons will work best at the moment. But we gotta focus on something in case all my neighbours are too stupid to develop any kind of defensive systems - and missiles it is. The decision is made!

Also, having more gun than actual giant robot on a robot is what happens when the Spiral Power is overflowing. You can't really design or predict what will happen then. We're just working on standard grunt design units now.

[Rettu Skcollob]

Are you still accepting flunkies/advisors and such? I'd like to play the part of the leader of the Mercantile party, if I may? :P

A chance to exercise my political/economic brain muscles :3

[Cubey]

Okay, but since you don't belong to my party, then it means you will be my rival. Beware!

[Mercenary Pen]

I'd say we're best going for a mix of beams and missiles, but probably we can skip railguns entirely unless the techs are useful for something else or we have to mass a swarm of weenie-ships to engage something until a more competent warship can get there.

Aha, as minister for defence procurement, I say our next project should be generation of the hyperspatial missile.

Codename: Project phantom
Special capability: Directly prior to reaching its target, this missile makes a shift onto the verges of hyperspace, phasing out of our own dimension to bypass shields and the hulls of enemy ships before re-materialising and detonating inside the target.

Of course, sir, this is merely the ravings of one of my tech-lunatics. We have no idea whether the project would be possible. In fact, he doesn't even have any proof that the laws of physics would work that way.

[Cubey]

Y'know, there actually is a missile project that works like that in GalCiv already. Not that we need to care much about shields - they stop beam weapons. It's chaff we want to watch out for.

Also - laws of physics? In MY game?! Never!

Exposition:
Just as there are three weapon types, there are three defence types. Shields counter beams, chaff counters missiles, armor counters railguns. These defences shield against other weapon types too, but much less efficiently (their defensive power is a square root of the nominal value - 25 shields protect against missiles, but only with a measly power of 5).

[Mercenary Pen]

Would now be a good time to mention that the same tech-lunatic was trying to convince me that we needed to create a self-teleporting killer nanovirus?

[Rettu Skcollob]

Question Time (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Question_Time) Transcript: 9th Oct, 2208
Page 2
-is hereby from the house for 24 hours for disorderly conduct."
Axefist Killbeard (War Party) leaves the house
Rettu Skcollob; Representative of Drilltopia; Mercantile Party: "Mr Speaker, my question is directed to the Treasurer. I- "
(Interjection): "What a surprise!"
Speaker: "Member for Researchington."
Rettu Skcollob: "Thank you Mr. Speaker. I would like to question the treasurer on recent Economic decisions taken by the Populist party. The recent Federal Budget spending in these hard economic times is irresponsible and blatantly short-sighted. The Populist agenda is unashamedly placating the people by throwing money at them, rather than investing in the infrastructure that will provide the long-term economic growth this country needs to prosper."
[Assorted sounds of disapproval, hissing]
Rettu Skcollob"Oh, typical reaction to sense! I tell you this!: No more will the Mercantile party allow the wool to be pulled over the eyes of the people!"
[Boos, shouting]
Speaker (Standing) "Order! Order in the House! Member for Drilltopia, please ask your question"
Rettu Skcollob:"Thank you Mr. Speaker. I ask the Treasurer whether his party has any plans for - or even realises the burden that their pattern of spending will be placing on the children of tomorrow: The future of this country!"
(Interjection) "Soulless money-grubbers!"
Rettu Skcollob: "The Mercantile party is planning for the economic future of this country while you play like spoiled children!"
[Sounds of outrage, boos, shouting]
"To hell with you!"
Rettu Skcollob: "If the Member will care to answer my-"
[Outroar, speaker shouts]
Rettu Skcollob: "Rising unemployment! Inefficient management! Dangerous levels of underlying inflation! You would squander trillions while the empire stagnates!"
Speaker: "Order! Order! Representative of Drilltopia, stand down!"
Rettu Skcollob: "You're all idiots, fools! Fools you hear! FOO-"
[The Member for Drilltopia is clubbed unconscious with a chair by the leader of the War Party, the representative of Laserton]
"Shut it!"
[The member for Laserton is struck below the belt by the member for Cofferville; Mercantile]
"You bastard!"
[Shouting, sounds of combat, until glorious Supreme Leader and leader of the Populist party restores order by the procedure of Beating Some Sense Into The House with his Rod of Office]

[Fri]

Ah, democracy.

anyway, not sure about the self teleporting part, but If my memory serves me right, I think we have nanovirus or something in that line for planetary invasion.

[Mercenary Pen]

Ah, democracy.

anyway, not sure about the self teleporting part, but If my memory serves me right, I think we have nanovirus or something in that line for planetary invasion.

I was deliberately trying for utterly unrealistic and impossible to achieve with that one, but I have got the basic designs for the 'Psychic Vulcanism Inducer' courtesy of the same tech-lunatic.

[Cubey]

Slight error in the transcript: the year's 2228. But as we all know, dates and recording the time flow isn't something Spirals are good at.
Also, I liked the part when I used the appropriate procedure. It was awesome and reasonable at the same time. Democracy is fun! (as long as I stay in power)

And I'll let you know, with Spirals there is no such term as unrealistic. There are only things we could do but won't, because it's cowardly, evil or too much of a hassle.

[Mercenary Pen]

And I'll let you know, with Spirals there is no such term as unrealistic. There are only things we could do but won't, because it's cowardly, evil or too much of a hassle.

Okay let me see if I've got this right:

Cowardly: making plans to destroy an entire planet by means of a psychic wombat
Evil: doing the laundry
Too much hassle: running away

That about right?

[AgentPaper]

If I could, I'd like to apply for the position of Warlord Mustache, diplomat and member of the War Party.

[Domochevsky]

In that case i'd also like to apply for the position of Chief Necromancer (The good kind, of course) in charge of frontline medics and applied medical research testing. :smallwink:

[Terraoblivion]

*facepalms* And out glorious general immediately provides a splendid example of why education is important. *Gestures in Chia's general direction* Otherwise we are all going to end up like that, completely without understanding of the great importance of vital topics such as the structure of pronouns in Mongour!

And i agree with our supreme leader that missiles are the proper weapons to build the spirits of our pople. They should be accompanied by inspirational music, however.

[Cubey]

Serious computer problems. No updates until they get solved.

It may take a while. Deal with it.

[tribble]

Also - laws of physics? In MY game?! Never!


It's more likely than you think...

[Blayze]

Egads, somebody attacked the Supreme Leader's computer with the teleporting nanovirus!


Also, let me get this straight. You expect me to kill Gandalf?

Remember, it's "You shall not pass", not "You shall not demolish me from orbit with a planet-sized starkiller."

[thefinalbattle]

i would like to apply for position of chief giant robot pilot. this means i will pilot the first giant robot i see.

[DeafnotDumb]

Also, let me get this straight. You expect me to kill Gandalf?

You need a reason to blow up a planet?

[Mercenary Pen]

Egads, somebody attacked the Supreme Leader's computer with the teleporting nanovirus!

It's not the same nanovirus, mine just turns biologicals into fluorescent pink ooze.


Remember, it's "You shall not pass", not "You shall not demolish me from orbit with a planet-sized starkiller."

The challenge here isn't to destroy Gandalf, it's to liberate him from the tower of Orthanc (you were reading from the wrong chapter).

[Cubey]

Chapter V: Pick on a homicidal maniac your own size!

Do you know how explorers of old days described distant lands as "here there be dragons"? Well, some travellers said that about a region of the galaxy. I thought they were joking...
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/6647/lp0415drath.png
But they were not. Large, lizardy and uttering barely concealed threats - looks like the Drath to me. Altarians displaced them from their very own homeland milennia ago, and they apparently still hold the grudge. Gee, I wonder why...

Would you believe that nothing important happened for almost a month after we got the Drath jerks' communication frequency? At least... that's if we don't count the Spiral wisemen busily figuring out how to colonize tricky planets. The intensive brainstorming process has been interrupted by a sudden message.
"SNAAAAKE!"
Huh? Is this GalCiv or Metal Gear Solid?
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/1204/lp0417decisions.png
An event like this happens from time to time, and however I deal with it will affect the whole race's alignment, along other more substantial bonuses. Well, I'm picking the most goody-two-shoes option, knowing well that at least some of my advisors will complain about it, and knowing even better that I have a good whackin' stick to silence their discontent. Sure, I'm taking a very minor economical hit, but between the bonus provided by being a republic and the freighters' trade profits, I'm still capable of doing something that didn't happen for a very long time until now - actually earning money!
In fact...
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/109/lp0418notax.png
I can reduce taxes to nothing and I am still earning money! What wrong could happen now?
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/7003/lp0419anothermeeting.png
Oh you planetary council people can go straight to hell!
Well, my day is ruined already but let's not let it get any worse. This proposed law is a disaster - the democratic system was working fine for me. Let's make sure the proposal fails.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/9114/lp0420damnit.png
Crap. Well, at least I won't have to deal with noisy party leaders this way.

And we're still earning money!

Only a week later, I receive news that will change the history of the galaxy forever. War has broken out - the first one ever! Or at least the first one since my rise to power. Who cares about the past?
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/1094/lp0421yorkorxwar.png
I didn't meet any of these races in person, but I've heard enough from my Minister of Gossips. The evil, ruthless robots of Yor are fighting the equally evil, cutthroat shady merchants from Korx. The reason of war? Rights to bear the title of "race with the stupidest name", I guess. We're better off without any of these guys, so whomever loses we all win.

http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/6994/lp0422yorturngood.png
Or apparently not. The Yor turned good so fast you wouldn't have time to chant "Dinobot" three times. That's... surprising. I wonder how that happened - does the heroic influence of noble Spirals reach that far? One way or another, now I have people to root for in this fight. Not that I can see any of the sides on my map yet.

No time to wonder about what happened, as Crow T Robot's relative over at Galaxy News Network brings good news!
http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/3039/lp0423barrencolonies.png
Beautiful. Finally, the time has come for the Spirals to set up a colony somewhere else than the Kamina star system! At least... if we don't get ninja'ed again.

We didn't get ninja'ed. Believe it!
http://img683.imageshack.us/img683/1909/lp0424leda.png
So many tiles, just waiting to build stuff on them! I see a food production bonus on the map - if I build a farm there, this planet will be able to support a positively huge number of Spirals. Does it sound like a money-making planet-shaped machine to you? Does to me.
Just gotta make sure I don't overdo it. 20 billion people or more on a single planet = bad things. I'm sure I mentioned that already.

Colonizing my third planet (with a 4th on its way - a colony ship is already flying towards the Hadrian system) reminded me of the Dark Yor. Their fleet of unarmed ships is laughable, but I need means of actually putting some soldiers on their planet. Time for research!
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/2471/lp0425invasionresearch.png
Okay. Almost a year of constant sciency action just for one project? I'm backing off of this one.

SUDDENLY!
http://img188.imageshack.us/img188/3607/lp0426uglytradethreat.png
Gah! What's with this ugly mask? How'd you get this frequency anyway? Who are you? Was that supposed to be... a threat? You serious? This is a joke, isn't it?

I hate prank calls.

Now, where was I? Ah yeah. I was supposed to write a memo to my flagship's captain - explore all kinds of anomalies but NOT the wormholes. They will shove you over to a random part of the galaxy. That's not only dangerous but your return will take ages, and we need your anomaly exploration skills here and now!
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/9774/lp0427wormholed.png
*sigh*
*rubs temples*
*the helm doesn't help*
I think you can figure out what happened by yourself. The flagship is in for a long way home now, and since they're out of range of my starbases' support then they can't fly around exploring stuff, oh no - gotta head straight towards my zone of influence. Maybe at least the ship will discover another race by accident! I could use more guys giving me barely concealed threats the first time I meet them!
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/2923/lp0428arceans.png
Here we go. The Arceans are a race of warrior traditions, which means they'll engage in conflict with others at the drop of a hat - as I soon was to discover. They're also the only race I discovered so far with actual space firepower. This has to change - now it's MY time to one-up somebody!

Remember the very beginning of this report, when I mentioned how the Spirals as a race are Creative? We didn't see much proof of it so far - until now.
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/5690/lp0429wastedcreativepro.png
Unfortunately, this project had only one week until completion anyway. I really should be angry about it, but...

http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/3986/lp0430ganmenmade.png
The first space battle unit of the Spirals left the dry dock! There was some argument about it among the chief engineers and scientists...

"I don't care about aerodynamics, there's no friction in space. It's just..."
"Do you have anything to say about my newest baby?"
"It's... kinda blocky. Ugly, too. And the design is very impractical."
"Watch your words! There is beauty in ugliness too! Besides, you try designing a better giant robot using GalCiv's limited unit editor!"
"I'm scrapping this project and designing a flying brick with lasers if it kills me! That'll teach..."
"Over my dead body!"

This is when I decided to move in.

"Greetings, gentlemen. What do we have here - a catfight, maybe?"
"Sir! I introduce to you the Beamgun Ganmen! Over a hundred meters tall and operated by five hot-blooded pilots, it is equipped with two faces (a wolf-like and a monstrous one) and a Megaman/Metroid style hand blaster. Additionally..."
"Does it have any insignia of the Spirals visible?"
"Several. In fact..."
"Good. Make more."

And more was made.
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/2953/lp0431lookingood.png

Also, a colony ship arrived on Hadrian 1. Nothing special about the planet though.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/8616/lp0432hadrian.png
Just a tile that increases planetary influence, which is just great as the planet is right in the middle of Human influence zone. This should prevent it from turning coat on me immediately.

I think it's about time to introduce everyone to another facet of GalCiv's gameplay.

SPAH IS SAPPIN' MY TECH CAPITAL!
Welcome to Espionage!
http://img338.imageshack.us/img338/9194/gc2taspirals1257381510.png
http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/3398/gc2taspirals1257381519.png
As you can see, planet Kamina has universities built on it all over. The tech capital's sabotage really hurts my science - this cannot be! I'm making sure I have my own spy ready next week, no matter how much cash it takes!

Espionage is rather simple from a superior leader's point of view - you spend money and eventually get spies. You can use them to neutralize enemy spies or send them to other planets to sabotage buildings and make them stop working as long as the spy is there. You can also make them just gather info on any race of your choosing - that way you get more knowledge about it but don't sabotage anything, but at least this type of spy is impossible to detect and neutralize.
Also, needless to say, even if you detect a spy you can't tell which civilization sent it. I suspect the Thalans.
Speaking of Thalans!
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/3276/gc2taspirals1257381532.png
Another Galactic Achievement. Yes, take that achievement and choke on it! We don't need fancy influence-increasing restaurants that may or may not be a reference to Hitchhiker's Guide to Galaxy: we'll see who will last for longer!

Not that I'm declaring war on them or anything. It'd be rude. Also, I finally meet the Yor.
http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/4034/gc2taspirals1257381538.png
What a nice guy. I wonder how the greeting would be like if the race remained evil. And now, for some comic relief - a minor race makes its appearance!
http://img22.imageshack.us/img22/7624/gc2taspirals1257381547.png
That was moderately amusing. I guess I won't abuse you guys for a while. That'd be wrong.

Speaking of abuse, let's make an unfair deal with the Thalans. This will be my vengeance!
http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/2443/gc2taspirals1257381790.png
I'm offering a nigh-useless stepping stone tech (it increases your number of possible trade routes and trade income - but it won't make you any good if you don't know how to trade in the first place!), and in exchange I get a pile of money and two technologies that offer passive bonuses to stuff I want and need. Looks like a good deal - both for me and the Thalans, who accept with a sh*t eating grin if they were physically capable of making one.

Remember what I said about the Arceans? About how they just look for opportunities to start a fight? Well, apparently offering them spare change is enough of an opportunity for them. Expect to see a lot of this in the future.
http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/6269/gc2taspirals1257382105.png

Is it time for more prank calls? Yes, it is!
http://img193.imageshack.us/img193/6425/gc2taspirals1257382202.png
http://img27.imageshack.us/img27/3696/gc2taspirals1257382539.png
Wait, something makes me think that the second call wasn't just some joker pretending to be a horrifying Snathi. Rather, that I actually got a call from the bloodthirsty kill-bunnies themselves.

I should be afraid now.

Better to make preparations for inevitable bloodshed. There's a defensive Super Project that allows all my units in a planet's orbit to fight in one group - if you don't build it then they fight one by one, honorably but stupidly since the enemy comes in groups. Well, even some minor races built this Orbital Command Center already, so now it's the Spirals' time - get with the program!
http://img503.imageshack.us/img503/9558/gc2taspirals1257382667.png

On the bright side, I stopped worrying about finances.
http://img42.imageshack.us/img42/4484/gc2taspirals1257382771.png
http://img36.imageshack.us/img36/2740/gc2taspirals1257382781.png
My flagship finding wads of cash floating aimlessly in space, Leda I finishing construction of an economic capital (like you can imagine, it gives a major boost to the planet's economy) - yeah, those Mercantile party jerks should feel satisfied. Not that they have anything to say, with the council laws forcing me to stay supreme and undisputed leader even if I don't want to. Forcing me - I have no choice in this matter. And I don't like it at all. Believe me.

I already had the eggheads work on Planetary Invasion, but changed the research subject when discovered a high gravity planet. It looks nice, but there is one tiny problem.
http://img33.imageshack.us/img33/4365/gc2taspirals1257383462.png
The Snathi are right next door to it. This is just lovely. Colonists, watch your guts lest they be ripped off you in a horrible manner!

http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/8721/gc2taspirals1257383530.png
What's this? The Thalans are so hated that even minor races declare war on them, undoubtedly marching to their horrible deaths? Now that's dedication!
The vengeance for Gandalf I will be mine yet, just you wait.

A new year's coming already - that was fast. I swear it wasn't that long until we had a previous Council meeting, and the thoughts of a new one is enough to make my head hurt. Let's see what's the topic this time.
http://img682.imageshack.us/img682/5872/gc2taspirals1257383583.png
I don't have any allies, so voting "no".
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/9958/gc2taspirals1257383593.png
And I find myself outvoted by everyone. I swear they do it just to spite me.

Before I know it, Jenna Casey is calling me. What could it be now? Came to rub salt into my wounds, did ya?
http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/6638/gc2taspirals1257383963.png
Apparently not. Was she so intimidated by my army of space Ganmen that she decided to stay on my good side? Or maybe the reason was more... personal - I am sorry lady, but backstabbing machiavelists are just not my type! Still, not going to say no to free money.

And since I did the this for every other planet, have a view of Starbuck II once I colonized it. That's right, we're talking the planet right next to the Snathi. Enjoy it while you still can.
http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/5351/gc2taspirals1257384098.png

(Now, as some of you already know, I had computer problems. I lost a lot of data, and GalCiv pictures were among them. So there won't be any screenshots of this part of the report - for shame, because fun stuff happened. I'm just as disappointed as you are.)

The time to conquer the Dark Yor draws near! There will still be a lot of time until I research transport ships for soldiers, but I can already send a fleet to take care of everything on the planet's orbit.
There was a new recruit, I think his name was Fri or something like that... apparently he's able to pilot a 5-man Ganmen all by his own. Well, it helps that these units have only one actual pilot, and the four others are there just to be hot-blooded and provide the unit with additional spirit.

Go Fri! Destroy the Dark Yor fleet, all by yourself!

And what do you know, Creativity procced again - Planetary Invasion has been researched over 20 weeks before schedule. About time this trait proved itself useful! I'm quickly buying a transport (buying, not building - I need it immediately, on the spot, now, now, NOW) on the planet closest to Dark Yor, which just happens to be Leda. Time to talk with my chief general - it's a video conference. I'd rather not to be in one room with him all alone, just in case.
"Remember, all soldiers are supposed to be volunteers. Don't forget that! Got it?"
"But I can at least put Kif on the transport, right?"
"Fine. Let's make an exception for Kif."
Volunteers. I am sure we'll get at least some. There ought to be some Spirals out there who are tired with the current way of living and taxation, and yearn for the old days of bashing heads in with a rock.

The next day, I'm calling Chiasaur to know the results.
"So, how many volunteers did we get?"
"About one billion."
"And Kif?"
"And Kif."

That went well. Since my long range scanners tell me that the flotilla of unarmed scouts is gone from Dark Yor's orbit for some reason, we're sending the transport out! One billion soldiers (and Kif) simply cannot wait until arrival.
And I am starting to have second thoughts.

I mean, we are the aggressors here, right? Do I really want to participate in such things? So many Dark Yor will die, it's like a genocide! The sight of broken robot families...

Wait, families? What am I thinking?! Snap out of it, dammit! This race is an even more evil offshot of what was pure evil in the first place! They don't have families, they are robots, controlled by AI! The whole planet's favorite pasttime is torturing each other for fun! Their technological backwardness is the only reason why they're not out for everyone's blood yet. By destroying them, I am making the world a favor!

My dramatic thoughts took so long that by the time I was done, the transport was already entering Dark Yor's atmosphere.

"So, what's the battle plan?"
"The robots outnumber us 14 to 1 but we're doing this smart. We're droppin' propaganda notes on them - everyone who joins the Spirals gets a Gurren Brigade frisbee and an opportunity to kill all their Dark Yor neighbours if they feel like it."
"Only that? You honestly think it's going to work?"

It did work. In fact, it worked so well that the first army we sent out to the field, manpower of 1 (Kif) found no opposition, just ruins and occasional groups of subverted Dark Yor, now loyal to my cause. We started the battle with one billion soldiers, and ended it having almost twice as many of them! Impossible? The Spirals go BEYOND the impossible!

But there's one thing that worried me. The Dark Yor leader was never fou...

"Ahaha!"
"Damn! Right in my closet - should've seen that coming!"
"Cubey, you bastard! You will pay for destroying my race without any provocation!"
"I... Really? Very well - do it then. I won't defend myself. It was my fault, I shouldn't have been so judgemental. Just because your people seemed like a genocidal and soulless race doesn't mean they really were like that. You really deserved a chance to prove yourselves."
"Huh? You an idiot or somethin'?"
"What?"
"I'm saying that we really WERE as evil as you thought we were. But does it matter? Silly idealism, what is it good for? Just be evil and do whatever you feel like doing - flay your neighbours, burn their house, boil their cat."
"I didn't know Dark Yor had cats."
"We didn't. I was being metaphorical. Anyway - I want to kill you, so that's what I'm going to do now!"
"Over my dead body!"
"That's the general idea, yes."

The duel that occured is beyond description (and totally not that I'm getting too lazy to continue the post). I didn't expect a Minor Race to be a match for me. The result of the struggle was horrible - when Kif entered the throne room (he was going to ask for reduction of his daily Chiasaur-related yellings), no one was there. Neither the Dark Yor chief robot nor Cubey were anywhere to be seen.

But the Spiral leader wasn't dead, oh no! In fact, he was going to return one day! And what a glorious return would it be...

Next time: a timeskip! Or not, depending on whether I recover my hard drive's data or not.

[kamikasei]

I love the Korath. "ZOMG we're researching SPORKS! Soon we will spork your faces right off!"

[Artanis]

Great update, even despite the data loss. A few comments:

-The graphics...dammit Cubey, you're making me want to buy TotA.
-I think the Snathi are squirrels :smallconfused:
-Looks like the Drath are already at work. 8-way war, here we come! :smalltongue:

[AgentPaper]

Warlord Mustache would like to point out that he couldn't possibly be the "Third Party", because that guy was named Anonymous, and his name is Warlord Mustache.

[Mercenary Pen]

I love the Korath. "ZOMG we're researching SPORKS! Soon we will spork your faces right off!"

And our mighty space fleet has been fitted with pen knives, for they are our mightiest weapons.

Sounds a bit like some of the trash that gets spouted in Alpha Centauri if anyone's played that...

[Rettu Skcollob]

Diary Excerpt: Rettu Skcollob, former leader of the Mercantile party

Well looks like I'm out of a job. And from the news, it sounds like the empire is doing economically better than ever. This does little to console me. Still looking for a new job as an advisor or something. I daren't set foot on Kamina again, I woke up in the parliament with my hands covered in blood and a terrible headache, and a construction worker taking all the seats away explained to me that the democratic system had been disbanded across the galaxy. Just my bloody luck. I tried the Korath, but the pay wasn't that good, and the interviewer kept thrusting eating tools and interesting pieces of art at me and telling me how the downfall of the Kaminoans was near with their latest advance or another. It was all rather sad really. After he tried explaining how crop rotation spelled the doom of the enemies of the Empire, I left. Maybe I can try the Yor or something.

[Mercenary Pen]

Diary Excerpt: Rettu Skcollob, former leader of the Mercantile party

Well looks like I'm out of a job. And from the news, it sounds like the empire is doing economically better than ever. This does little to console me. Still looking for a new job as an advisor or something. I daren't set foot on Kamina again, I woke up in the parliament with my hands covered in blood and a terrible headache, and a construction worker taking all the seats away explained to me that the democratic system had been disbanded across the galaxy. Just my bloody luck. I tried the Korath, but the pay wasn't that good, and the interviewer kept thrusting eating tools and interesting pieces of art at me and telling me how the downfall of the Kaminoans was near with their latest advance or another. It was all rather sad really. After he tried explaining how crop rotation spelled the doom of the enemies of the Empire, I left. Maybe I can try the Yor or something.


Did they also explain their plan to conquer the galaxy with inane finger exercises?

[Blayze]

Diary entries? Don't mind if I do!


Great. Just great. I finally get a decent position in this cabinet -- namely, being in charge of the big red button that fires all our planetary defence lasers at the enemy.

Funny, I can't remember actually ever seeing any planetary defences. Ah well. Anyway, I get that decent position and BAM! Space Brussels shoots our government down. As if that wasn't bad enough, our Supreme Leader is nowhere to be found. Just typical -- the guy probably skipped town to shoot things down with my precious lasers. In space.

Ah well, at least I now have "experience of firing lasers" on my CV. It should be enough to get me a job as a Ganmen pilot, at least.

[AgentPaper]

Wait, does this mean Warlord Mustache has to become an actual warlord now or something? Or do you still have room for diplomats excelling in creating everlasting warpeace?

[Cubey]

Chapter VI: I'm back - short title, long update

A tiny roadside cafe on Kamina. It's almost empty, the only patron is a quiet and very tired looking guy.

SUDDENLY! The supreme leader of the Spirals enters. And they both start talking like if nothing happened.

"So, you came."
"I, umm. There was no other choice."
"I recognize your voice. So it was you, after all. Kif!"
The leader removes his supreme leader helm of supreme leadership. It is indeed Kif.
"Was it hard to pretend being me?" The quiet guy was yours truly, Cubey.
"After your disappearance... someone had to take control or the whole empire would dissolve into ruin. It wasn't hard, I found the helmet in the throne room, I just had to make sure to wear it all the time."
Kif sounds apologetic. I don't have the heart to be too hard on him for usurping my position. He saved the race, after all.
"Okay Kif. Thanks for all the work you have done. I will probably give you a medal or a promotion or something like that. Now, hand the helm over."
"I, but..."
"Listen. Your masquerade is bound to be discovered sooner or later. Imagine this - what would Chiasaur do if he discovered he was taking orders from, out of all people, Kif, for such a long time?"
"..."

It's good to have the helm AND my position back. Well, I'm home! Although for most citizens, the supreme leader Cubey wasn't gone for more than a few weeks, one year and a half ago. Needless to say, everything you've read so far is confidential, to be kept out of knowledge of the general populace and especially (for Kif's sake) Chiasaur's. Offenders will be punished by tasting Nia's cooking for two months straight.

The date is January 1st, year 2232. It's been five years since I started my reign, and I've spent over a year and a half of that time in exile. You probably wonder what happened, and what I was doing all that time while Kif was pretending to be me. He told me he was being a pompous hot-blooded moron on the outside while making sure the Spiral civilization progresses and is kept safe at the same time. If that's how the general populace views me then I think I should be at least mildly offended. Well, I'll see how good a job did he do later.

The battle with the Dark Yor honcho was terrible. After an energy blast of his caused the impossible - shot the helm off my head, I had to counter with an impossible feat of my own. With a mighty yell, I punched him so hard that a hole between dimensions was ripped. The Dark Yor fell inside and was never heard of again - but so did I. I woke up with memory loss on an unknown world. As I later discovered, it belonged to no one else but the Thalans. They are a very alien race, who came from the future that was on the brink of destruction. They came back to the present time, wanting to prevent this destruction by any means possible. Which apparently includes enslaving or exterminating every other race, especially the Humans.
This hopeless determinism reminded me of the Anti-Spirals! As I learnt of the Thalans' inhumane plans I regained my memory. I knew who I was, and what I had to do - stop the Thalans and return home, not necessarily in that order. But since I had no money, commuting took a while. At least I had the towel. Always remember to carry a towel.

Let's take a look at the map of the galaxy. See how the situation changed in the meantime.
http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/4274/lp0601map.png
Habitable planets are a rarity, but each race extended their spheres of influence as much as they could. That includes the Spirals - with starbases at strategical locations almost the whole galaxy is within our reach. The sole exception being Korath Korner, in the upper right part of the map.

http://img410.imageshack.us/img410/6248/lp0602councilwhynovotes.png
The Planetary Council enforced a law limiting trade routes for evil races - serves 'em right! The law passed thanks to Kif's efforts, and in fact was voted on just a day before my glorious return.
(If you wonder why the screen says each race has exactly 0 votes in the council then I'll have you know - I have not the slightest idea either.)

Believe it or not, but the Thalans are no more. The war they had with minor races whose names I can't be bothered to remember was too unbearable - but only after the Arceans joined in, funded (of course!) by a mysterious unknown third party. Little does everyone know, but my efforts to sabotage the Thalan empire from within had a large influence on the war's outcome.
And when they finally gave up, the Thalans surrendered... to the Korx, who had nothing to do with the war. I didn't expect that.

Also pay attention to the notice in the upper left corner. The Korath found and have started mining an Ascension Crystal - one shard a week, and once they get a thousand, the whole race will ascend into a higher plane of existence and become like unstoppable gods. Needless to say, that's a very bad thing. I'll have to find and destroy their ascension facility - eventually. For now, I'm just glad they stopped bragging about their new and terrifying discoveries, such as a nation-wide dental plan.

http://img510.imageshack.us/img510/3774/lp0604planetkamina.png
Planet Kamina. It's no longer covered by hundreds of universities - with Terra's revolutionary ideas and Kif's approval, even education goes beyond the impossible. Witness Cities of Learning - giant metropolises dedicated solely to teaching.

http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/2849/lp0605planetkamina2.png
Kamina II is still kind of a snow-covered stick in the mud, but at least it's a class 8 stick in the mud now! The beauty of terraforming!

http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/3822/lp0606planetquendor.png
Quendor is a new acquisition. An aquatic planet, it has one science-y tile but rather than that is pretty average. Still nice - in a galaxy like this, every new planet is a real blessing.

http://img255.imageshack.us/img255/2555/lp0607planethadrian.png
Hadrian is fully developed, and with the Advanced Barren World Colonization tech researched I can utilize its full potential. Which in this case means - science, and more science!

http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/9554/lp0608planetleda.png
With its Economical Capital, Leda is still busy churning out stacks of tax money to fuel my coffers.

http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/5774/lp0609planetstarbuck.png
Starbuck is still developing, but it's a relief to see it hasn't fallen prey to the Snathi yet.

http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/8665/lp0610planetdarkyor.png
And Dark Yor... prospers! Once its homicidal original owners have been removed, the planet became a bustling paradise of engineering. With a Manufacturing Capital built, it offers so much production that I was easily able to construct not one, but two Galactic Achivements. The first one, Galactic Bazaar is visible already. Before I show you the other one, there is one thing I want to do.

Since Dark Yor doesn't produce anything at the moment, all of its manufacturing capabilities are going to waste. Right? Well, not exactly. I can order a planet to focus on one area - for example, science. That way it loses some of its production capabilities, but science output is increased in a similar amount. It doesn't make much of a difference usually... but here we have an exception.
http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/8311/lp0611darkyortradegood.png
As you can see, the egghead factor increased by over 100%. And here's the second Galactic Achievement - a trade good, Aphrodisiac.

Stop looking at me like that! It was Kif's idea.

Now, about races the Spirals discovered during my absence. Or should I say, one race.
http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/351/lp0612krynnarethreat.png
The Krynn are a race of religious fanatics. If you want to convert, they'll treat you okay, but otherwise you're as good as dead. They are determined, with powerful military and good economical and science support. They also already tried to extort money from us, but Kif acted out of character and told them to bite him. I am starting to respect that guy.
And last but not the least, the Krynn homeworld is situated right next to the Snathi. That's right - Starbuck has two lethal threats at its doorstep!

But worry not, because Starbuck also has a brave defender.
http://img252.imageshack.us/img252/4913/lp0613bravesirfri.png
After being late for the Dark Yor battle, Fri received a "promotion" - to the chief defender of Starbuck. Which means that whomever attacks it, his unit will be the first to defend. Awesome, isn't it? I'm sure he'll put up a valiant fight before his Ganmen explodes in flames.

Now, here's a secret to the Spirals' growth.
http://img252.imageshack.us/img252/8114/lp0614researchrate.png
By default, the Spirals focus their efforts in all three production areas (social, military and research) evenly. Or at least try to. Kif did something else - he ordered everyone to focus on research more than everything else. The decrease of production capabilities wasn't very noticeable, but the research increase was.
A boring and practical solution? No wonder I ignored it until now!

Now, more graphs. Here's how we stand militarily:
http://img410.imageshack.us/img410/6625/lp0615timelinemilitary.png
Pretty bad. The only races with weaker military are the Drath and Humans. Basic Ganmen can only get you so far - I need something with extra oomph. Kif made a mistake ignoring this, and now I'll have to fix it.

http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/1663/lp0616timelineresearch.png
How fortunate that we have the brainpower to think of some really neat toys really fast!

Oh yeah, and since enough time has passed, the hated degree that banned everyone from non-Imperial forms of government has been lifted. Let's get democratic again! After so long, I'm starting to miss the senate meetings and chaos that was bound to ensue on each and every one of them.
http://img410.imageshack.us/img410/518/lp0617letsgorepublic.png

To Kif's credit, he didn't abandon the military branch completely. He was responsible for a new unit design, after all. It's not an armed unit though, but a next generation scout.
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/3922/lp0618newscout.png
It's more expensive than the previous model, but has a much better range, better scanners, a survey module to explore anomalies, and last but not the least - a Spirals flag to let everyone know to whom does this sleek and beautiful spaceship belong to.

Overall, how do we fare after the long absence of the Spirals' true supreme leader?
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/7097/lp0619rankednumberone.png
Ranked number one? Could be worse.

http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/1542/lp0620politics.png
The galaxy is no longer a peaceful place. Wars break out frequently, each one making someone stronger when it ends. I am especially wary of the Korx, who not only are a band of cutthroat mercenaries who'd sell their own mothers if they had any left, but are also pretty powerful and influential after Thalans surrendered all their planets to them.

But first, I'll have to take care of a different but no less dangerous threat.
http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/2446/lp0621snathi.png
That's right, the Snathi! There are no second thoughts here - everyone knows how evil they are, and that includes them. In fact, they are the ones who take biggest pride in being as evil as possible. They make the Dark Yor look peaceful in comparison. They are beyond the impossible in their levels of evil!

And although the description mentions nuts, they are still bunnies to me and not squirrels. Bunnies, I say!

They must be vanquished. Before I do that though, I have two important matters to take care of.
Matter #1: Construct a special project I, ahem, acquired from the Krynn.
http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/7003/lp0622spytrainingcenter.png

Matter #2: Call Kif in.
"Here you are. And not wearing my helm anymore, good."
"S... sir?"
"I have decided to honor everything you have done. As a reward, you receive a promotion - you are now a general. To be more exact, a general and the sole commanding officer of our First Assault Army. There are only two people above you in the chain of command - Chiasaur, and me."
"Really? Thank you Sir! How many soldiers do I have under my command?"
"No one. The First Assault Army is still but one soldier - and it's you Kif, just you. Now get moving. The transport will be launching soon and I want you on it."
Judging by the number of achievements under his belt, Kif is a great man. And a great man is a powerful one. The First Assault Army will be unstoppable.
http://img142.imageshack.us/img142/4263/lp0623transporttosnathi.png

I already knew how to deal with the Snathi - use the same tactic that worked with the Dark Yor. Their society is on the verge of collapsing into infighting, and they only need a small propaganda push to fall into that state. But there is one tiny problem. This push required funds, funds that I didn't have.

Solution? Sell some stuff to other races.
http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/7494/lp0624sellingtech.png
Now, you may protest: "Wait, what the hell are you doing, Supreme Leader sir! Terra worked hard to create the Cities of Learning, you want to just give them away to the ruthless Korx like that?"

I know what I'm doing. Let us take a closer look:
http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/7101/lp0625citiesoflearning.png
Let's compare this design to Research Centers, a project that the Korx are already familiar with.
http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/6128/lp0626researchcenters.png
Both facilities offer the same bonus, but the Cities are more expensive to maintain. Which is why I am sure - the Korx will not only find the Cities of no use, they will not even think about building any, ever. They find no beauty in spirit and willpower, valuing only money and power to terrorise others. By making them spend money on a design they have no use for I am making a favor for the rest of the galaxy.

But just to be sure, I am hiding from Terra for a while now. That woman is scary when angered.

And while we're at it, let's sell some tech to Snathi as well. I am sure they will find it very useful - that is, until they get conquered by my volunteer army of accountants, farmers and other ferocious professions.
http://img513.imageshack.us/img513/5572/lp0627unfairdealwithsna.png
That's right. Buy the Planetary Invasion schematic. Did you wonder why did I research it? What am I going to do with it? THIS!
http://img513.imageshack.us/img513/5851/lp0628declarewar.png

But since we're an Interstellar Republic, a declaration of war has to be approved by the senate.
http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/6871/lp0629senateagrees.png
Fortunately, most of the chairs support me. The Mercantile party is especially under-represented, probably because most of its members didn't make it in time to return once they learnt the horrible crime of democracy isn't illegal anymore. Well, sucks to be them. The War Party is more numerous, but I doubt they have trouble with warfare.

The transport has arrived swiftly - when I said Snathi are Starbuck's neighbours, I really meant it. The frisbees are ready so let's start the propaganda warfare once again. It worked fine the last time.
http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/4909/lp0630propaganda.png
http://img40.imageshack.us/img40/3858/lp0631wewin.png
And once again, Kif finds himself surrounded by ruins and absolutely no enemies, and facing a mildly embarassing situation of us having more allied soldiers at the end of the battle than what we had at the start. It seems the Snathi were just a step away from having destroyed themselves from within, just like the Dark Yor before - who knew?

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/9440/lp0632snathiareover.png
And the Spirals are the only race who can brag they've defeated another empire. Make that two of them, in fact. Note: Nobody defeated the Thalans, they have surrendered.

But despite the military success, I have a lingering feeling that it's not quite over. I'm checking my closet to be sure - no Snathi leader there. Phew. But my current units might not be enough to fight off a more serious threat. Let's start inventing weapons. But first, we must take what we already have one step further.
http://img11.imageshack.us/img11/6508/lp0633democracyresearch.png
Interstellar Republic, make way for Star Democracy!

What's next: I don't know yet! But I'm sure it will be hilarious and exciting.

[Mercenary Pen]

And thus, young children to whom I tell this story, were the evil squirrels bunnies obliterated.

[thefinalbattle]

if i do not pilot a robot, can i have the job of chief exploding pickle examiner?

[Cubey]

Oh, sorry about that. Your post was lost in the confusion. I'm always looking for more pilots so you're in.

[The Glyphstone]

At least being the Chief Diplomat of a society that kicks reason to the curb and eradicates its enemies instead of making treaties with them is an easy job. :)

[chiasaur11]

And Kif once again survives. I knew this tactic had potential!

Still, it's a shame to have so few corpses to stride heroically over at the conclusion of these wars. Makes the propaganda posters a bit dull visually.

[The Glyphstone]

You just need to be more creative - aren't all of your 'allied troops' converted natives? Have a few of them be 'accidental casualties', then dress them up in some spare equipment from the enemy armories to take pictures of...

Yes, the Propaganda Department is a subdivision of the Diplomacy Bureau, why do you ask?

[chiasaur11]

You just need to be more creative - aren't all of your 'allied troops' converted natives? Have a few of them be 'accidental casualties', then dress them up in some spare equipment from the enemy armories to take pictures of...

Yes, the Propaganda Department is a subdivision of the Diplomacy Bureau, why do you ask?

I know, I know, the bodies of our "enemies" work fine. But look at the pathetic number of casualties on our side!

You don't beat the killbots that way!

[Cubey]

I'd say having the casualty count of -100% is something worthy of putting on a propaganda poster.

And we actually did beat the killbots already.

[thefinalbattle]

eeeeeeeeeeeeexcelent.

[chiasaur11]

I'd say having the casualty count of -100% is something worthy of putting on a propaganda poster.

And we actually did beat the killbots already.

Sure, we beat SOME killbots, but not THE Killbots. We beat the offbrands, the Dr. Faygos of the Killbot world. Real Killbots don't surrender or go over to your side! They just, you know, kill. Although -100% casualties is somewhat of a propaganda boon, I admit.

[DeafnotDumb]

The report presented below was scavenged from the wastepaper basket in the Supreme Leader's office.



Weapon Tester Guy's report on Explorer 1739:
Handling: Fast as a speeding drill! Speeeeeeeed speedspeedspeed! Speed is good!
Deffensive capabilities: Bo-ring. Who cares? The empty space is filled up with an artistic interpretation of Saint Kamina wearing his Holy Cloak and Blessed Shades of Awesome.
Offensive Capabilites: Recomended for heroically crashing into giantic enemy ships while heroically screaming at the top of your breath. Heroically.
Other uses: There are other uses?
Suggestions: This section is filled with rather detailed but poorly drawn depictions of a giantic, multi-armed robot overweighed with various pieces of complex weaponry overflowing with spiral energy defeating an enemy navy by itself while surrounded with explosions, puppies and adoring women and the words GUNS GUNS GUNS scrawled all over.

[Terraoblivion]

And once more the power of education has been shown. Through the use of knowledge and informing the Snathi of how life could be better we have avoided the brutality and bloodshed that would have happened had we had to actively fight them.

Also has anyone seen the supreme leader? There are some things i'd like to discuss with him.

[thefinalbattle]

permission to pencil him in for five, oh supreme leader?

[Cubey]

*can't respond to anyone. Too busy hiding*

[chiasaur11]

You heard the man. He's busy.

And, as the commander of all military enterprises, that makes me the current man in charge.

All complaints, compliments, demands?


Direct 'em here. Cubey doesn't need to be bothered.

Cubey, you owe me one.

[The Glyphstone]

Might I shugghest opening trade relashuns wish the Korath? On my lasht embasshy vishut, they showed to me a new dishtillashun fashility that they shaid would be the deshtructshun of their enemysh. I washn't impresshed, but managed to acqu...acqui....get a large amount of free shamplesh. I think it'sh got shome potenshul ash a luxshury good...

[thefinalbattle]

alright porky what have you done with the_glyphstone?

[The Glyphstone]

who'sh porky? Sherioushly, you gotta try shome of thish shtuff, it'sh exshellent. Almosht Shpiral quality, but with a little shomething exshtra I can't figure out. And it'sh not like I got much elsh to do beshidesh drink, long ash we keep on pratishing thish 'giant mecha diplomashy'.

[Mercenary Pen]

*fake germanic accent*

Okay, zis vill only take a moment. Pleass hold him shtill vhile I teleport zis small quantity of super-strength booze neutraliser directly into his bloodstream.

Zere, if I haff measured ze dosage correctly, he vill not be able to get drunk for ze next seventeen years.

No need to applaud.

[chiasaur11]

who'sh porky? Sherioushly, you gotta try shome of thish shtuff, it'sh exshellent. Almosht Shpiral quality, but with a little shomething exshtra I can't figure out. And it'sh not like I got much elsh to do beshidesh drink, long ash we keep on pratishing thish 'giant mecha diplomashy'.

Are you implying there's any other kind of diplomacy?

You must have smoked some bad granola, hippy.

[Terraoblivion]

Of course there are other kinds of diplomacy. If people would just care to look at the gathered body of knowledge created by civilized beings then it becomes clear that cooperation in almost all cases leads to better results for all parties involved if looked at in the long term. Sadly it appears that so many of the other species inhabiting our galaxy doesn't understand this simple truth, though it appears that the Yor at least have come to their senses. Surely others will be able to see the wisdom in this too.

[Mercenary Pen]

On the um... plus side, thanks to my technical lunatic (who sort of escaped just before the last post I made) we now have the ability to use not being drunk as a weapon against our enemies.

Needless to say, the beer convention at the Korath starbase Geneva- where our esteemed (if slightly tipsy until a short while ago) diplomat just got back from- has declared this to be an inhumane- sorry, un-korathi- weapon and banned its use.

But I say we use it anyway, in defiance of the starbase Geneva beer convention.

[Rettu Skcollob]

Diary Excerpt: Member for Drilltopia

Well apparently democracy's coming to my home galaxy, so I zipped over there on the fastest space taxi I could buy. I laid low for a little, but I found out I hadn't killed anyone in that last senate meeting, which is good... In fact, the War Party decided to give me a job as Shadow Treasurer, which is... Fantastic. I feel a little bad for defecting from my party, but the War Party is popular enough that my electorate still ate it up. Apparently one of them tried to make off with my wallet in the confusion, and I beat him to a pulp with his own Silly Hat of Office. I met him to apologise, and apparently he had so much fun that he wants me to spar with him once a week from now on.

They gave me a cool helmet at least, and this little device to shoot nuts at other party members whenever I get bored... I'd been wondering who was doing that.

[Celesyne]

This game is turn-based right? I must get it, and in the mean time pray for our Supreme Leaders continued excellence....and maybe a bit more of me :smallbiggrin:

[thefinalbattle]

sir, do you want a position among the forces of the spirals?

[Ka-ther Fangfoot]

I hope it is not too late to sign up as a pilot? I think I want to be blood-thirsty but cowardly and will crush the evil aliens with the power of FRIENDSHIP! :smalltongue:

And can my pilot be named Yaktan? With my ship being the Nom-Nom. :smallsmile:

[Artanis]

This game is turn-based right? I must get it, and in the mean time pray for our Supreme Leaders continued excellence....and maybe a bit more of me :smallbiggrin:

Yup, it's turn-based. In fact, it's a 4X, the same genre as Alpha Centauri and the Civilization series.

If you get it, I suggest you get the package deal for the game and the two expansions. Each expansion is so far beyond the previous iteration that it's astounding.

[Celesyne]

sir, do you want a position among the forces of the spirals?

I already have a position among the forces of the great Spirals! I was just a little late with that colony ship on my way to Gandalf I, seriously, we need bigger engines in these things.

[Cubey]

Chapter VII: Diplomacy is a hard game

Fri isn't the only one defending Starbuck. There's more redshirts around, and some of them even posted on this very thread! That makes them less anonymous, but no less expendable.
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/710/lp0701redshirts.png
This "tfb" is supposed to be truefinalbattle - his full name didn't fit into the form. Oh well.

With Star Democracy soon researched, it's time to finally take care of what Kif, curse the pacifist, chose to ignore. Let's work on some weapons!
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/6949/lp0702missileresearch.png
The Spiral wisemen decided the most manly weapon out of these three are the missiles. The decision making process consisted of lots of hot-blooded yelling, followed by watching some Macross DVDs.

Since we have Democracy as an option, let's put it to use.
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/4041/lp0703democracy.png
Even less responsibility but the same power as always (as long as people vote for me) - gotta love it. And that's not the end of good news.
http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/9306/lp0704newplanet.png
A planet, ready for colonization! It requires tech that I don't have yet (nor does anyone else - which explains why it's still uninhabited), but we're so damn smart now the obligatory research won't take more than a few weeks. A colony ship is on its way already, and in the meantime...
http://img260.imageshack.us/img260/3707/lp0705politicalcap.png
Researching democracy allowed me to construct another capital. The political one increases planetary influence and morale. Surprisingly, the latter bonus is much greater than the former. Apparently the citizens are just really happy they can watch a pretty building. I'm having flashbacks to Dwarf Fortress.

Upon arrival on planet Hatch, Spiral colonists discover that it wasn't so uninhabited at all.
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/4868/lp0706decisions.png
I'll leave these people alone. They survived in an extremely toxic environment. I bet they're so tough that if anyone wanted to move them, they'd crush him with their buttcheeks.
But even with some of its terrain already taken by natives, the planet looks pretty sweet.
http://img40.imageshack.us/img40/8984/lp0707planetsurface.png
Do I see a x4 research tile there? Yes I do. And a x2 production tile right next to it! This is going to be great.
Not so long after, we have an election. The people are happy so they will certainly vote for my party, right? Right?
http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/5167/lp0708election.png
Right! For a change, everything goes without complications. All other parties are powerless now - the once great Mercantile have no place in the senate anymore, and even the War Party is reduced to meager 4 votes. Other than them we have a small presence of Federalists (they like money just like Mercantile, although they want to make it locally and not via trading) and a single Pacifist. I'm surprised the Spirals have any pacifists at all, to be honest. Maybe it's Kif.

Everything is spiffy. Economy is stable, research is progressing smoothly, the population loves me... all I have to do now is sit back and relax. Look, it's a Korath transmission! They're going to threaten me with hilarious research projects again.
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/6007/lp0709korathwar.png
Or not. The whole race decided that ground up Spiral bones would make an excellent addition to their Soil Enhancement of DOOM. Very well - I'll show them the true meaning of Spiral power! The Daisy squadron (Fri, truefinalbattle and Even Human) is already sent towards the Korath lands... er, space. It's in the other corner of the galaxy so it will take them a while to arrive. I dispatched several other units in the same direction. ETA: long.

Fighting the Korath will be a piece of cake. Or rather would be, if not for two issues that currently make it a hopeless struggle. Not that we're going to give up, oh no. Anyway: issue one - we are severely outmatched in terms of military might. Issue two - the Korath are out of our ships' range.

The first issue is being solved with, what else! Hard work and guts! I mean, science. Yes, that.
http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/9810/lp0710biggershipresearc.png
Large ships held together only by willpower and unknown force? I like the sound of that!

Second issue is even easier to fix. I'm sending a constructor out, as close to the Korath Korner as its engines let it. Thanks to scientific progress during Kif's reign, we already have the Warp Drive - it makes any unit I install it on really fast. This applies to constructors, but not to the Ganmen - no place for extra engines, they need guns!
http://img40.imageshack.us/img40/6528/lp0711starbaserange.png
So, the constructor arrives and builds a starbase. Now I'll be able to set foot on Korath colonies! Another constructor soon follows, upgrading the base and installing some basic weaponry.

Now, I already have the Warp Drive, so my units won't go any faster. But that won't do. I feel the need, the need for speed. My research won't help me here, but maybe other races have something I could use.
http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/1537/lp0712iwantspeed.png
The Arceans do. I don't care much for the Navigation Centers, but the passive boost to all units' speed is what I want. The question is - will they be willing to share the tech?
http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/3950/lp0713easytrade.png
Oh yes they will! It seems we have another race fascinated with our Cities of Learning here. Another race that won't find them to be of any use, since they already have more efficient research facilities. Well, can't blame them for appreciating Terra's idea. I'm taking the Navigation blueprint, along two others and a pile of cash. Nice time doing business with you!

Do you remember when I mentioned how the Korath are mining Ascension crystals? Good that they've declared war on me. It gives me an opportunity to stop them before it's too late. But they're not the only ones. The Arceans are trying to ascend as well.
http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/6054/lp0714ascension.png
I just discovered this starbase, and judging from reports I receive they have another one somewhere out there. Something to deal with later.
Speaking of discoveries, want to know what exactly anomalies do? I mentioned they give you benefits, and I showed you how my explorers found money in them. But there's more to them than that. Anomalies may provide my civilization with small bonuses to various fields and zones of expertise.
http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/2714/lp0715anomaly.png
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/7076/lp0716moreanomaly.png
As you can see, these bonuses are really small, miniscule even. But add them up and eventually they'll make a difference. You know - hard work, perseverance, the usual drivel. If by hard work you mean flying in an awesome spaceship and exploring fun stuff, that is.

SUDDENLY!
http://img137.imageshack.us/img137/7663/lp0717moredecision.png
I didn't realize this week's theme is "Spirals die in magma". I won't let that happen, I can't let that happen and I won't let that happen! Here's a chance to prove how good we are - spend money until either the volcano or everything around it goes away. I have cash to burn. Cash, not people.

Although the crisis was averted, the Spirals suffered their first casualty against the Korath.
http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/3344/lp0718scoutdies.png
A scout foolishly went too close the Korath planets and was obliterated in an instant. The search for anomalies is not always fun.

In the meantime, preparations for battle continue.
http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/1026/lp0719tradegood.png
A trade good that makes my units even tougher was created. It doesn't require great technology to develop, I'm surprised nobody patented it before me.

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/5660/lp0720councilvotestarbu.png
The United Planets Council gathers again. As you may have noticed, the Spirals have more votes than anyone else for some reason. With the help of my new best friends the Yor, it is decided that the production-increasing Galaxy Prison will be constructed on a Spiral world. To be more precise, Starbuck II. That's right, throw lots of criminals to the mix and make that planet an even more dangerous place to live!

http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/3986/lp0721cautiousexplore.png
A scout is carefully exploring Korath territory. The pilot is cautious, hoping not to share the fate of the last Spiral to visit this area.

http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/669/lp0722korathunit.png
Not only does the explorer escape alive, I also get valuable data - footage of a Korath fighter. Analysis of its design tells me the Korath are backwards technologically. It's amusing when you remember about their bragging of how their tech will be the doom of me. This unit's railguns are very unimpressive and it has no armor. Not that my Ganmen are any better... for the time being. This will change soon. Very soon.

http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/7718/lp0723warwithjessuins.png
Huh?
Remember the Jessuins? The first race I met, when I didn't even discover a translator yet? Although Minor, they have built quite an empire for themselves. Only one planet, but enough starbases and spaceships. And now they want war. I feel betrayed. I thought we were friends. Sure, I called you guys ugly faces the first time we met, but that was just a joke! And it's not that you could understand that at the time. Or could you?!

Oh well. More people to grind into dust, I guess.
http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/7194/lp0724arceansjoin.png
In other news, due to a diplomatic accident that I swear Warlord Moustache was not involved in (plotting, murder, etc), the Arceans join in to the war. On my side, not the Koraths'. Can't say I mind.

http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/2701/lp0725goodmissiles.png
Finally! The wisemen completed the design for missiles that are actualy useful. The boom they make is quite decent. Except for the ones armed with drills instead of explosive payloads. They don't explode, they just pierce through the enemy and come out on the other side.

http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/1188/lp0726newrace.png
A new Minor Race situated itself somewhere in Altarian space. Vegans, huh? So, you don't like meat, I assume. But I'll still send The Glyphstone to... meet you. Sorry, I have to make a lame joke from time to time. But I swear, this habit will be the end of me. While I was busy cracking this line, the Korath snuck on my starbase.
http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/9160/lp0727starbaselost.png
And oblitarated it. The base's basic defenses were not enough to fight them back - their units might be primitive but they make up for it in numbers. This made me really angry! Time to rebuild the starbase, and avenge the last one by shooting every single Korath out of the sky!

And I'm getting the means of actually doing that for a change. First, let's take a look at the research tree.
http://img442.imageshack.us/img442/7718/lp0728thislooksneat.png
Become one with your ship? That sounds nifty. Work on that. Now, let's talk with my developers.
"Why is this design only partially humanoid?"
"More... place for missiles?"
"Project approved!"

http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/4044/lp0729myfirstbattleship.png
My first medium-sized unit has been created. Korath, beware! Or should I say, Jessuins! Let's take a closer look.
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/63/lp0730mediumdesign.png
With a hideous, grimacing face to strike terror into hearts of my enemies, the Ship Ganmen is constructed to fight beam-armed enemies. Most races in the galaxy use energy weapons (including our former friends Jessuins), so it wasn't just a random choice. I found out that some Korath units have beams as well. So the unit's defense is solid. As for its offense, two words: Missile. Spam. It'll be alright.

I also need a unit designated to defeat railgun-armed Korath fighters. And here it is - the next generation of Ganmen!
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/2141/lp0731smalldesign.png

Next time: TO WAR!

[Mercenary Pen]

And so, the supreme leader has finally developed Veritech fighters, and the missiles to arm them with.

Now the robotech masters Jessuins are doomed. We just need shadow devices better technology so we can defeat the Korath invid.

Oh, wait, I think I got something wrong there...

[thefinalbattle]

daisy squadron?

[Artanis]

So missiles often explode, and when they don't, they still often make other things explode. Can I be Minister of Missiles? I did a great demolition job on the old senate building when you were declared Emperor again and had it demolished. And it's totally unrelated to the half-mile blast crater where the old senate building once stood and the charges of Grand Theft Explosives from the demolitions company. Honest.

Besides, it gave you an even better excuse to build a bigger, even more manly one to replace it!


Some OOC comments:

*Hot damn, Hatch II is going to be a hell of a research world, especially under your "four planets in the entire galaxy at all" settings :smalltongue:

*Good god, what are some of those TotA techs worth, and what's your diplomacy? In DA, I'm lucky to get anything even resembling the Arcean trade...but then, my diplomacy usually sucks because I'm too busy trying to keep everybody from killing me.

*A three-way war that doesn't involve the Drath? That's honestly pretty rare when the Drath are in the game :smallwink:

*I appreciate the fact that you spoiler the pictures. I shudder to think how long it would take for the page to stabilize if all of them were loading where we can see them.

[Cubey]

Had to fix a typo - I said the scout "escaped alive", not "arrive", dammit. It's a bad sign when I start using Engrish. Now, to answer everyone's conceln desu concerns.

Mercenary Pen - of course you got something wrong here. While I approve of your initiative, I don't think we can have VFs that are almost 300 meters long. I'd have to design Tiny units to fit that role, but I simply can't be arsed to.
Still, your insights are commendable. As your reward, you will receive a pineapple salad.

thefinalbattle - that's right. Daisy Squadron. I am a fan of Nadesico so I name my battle formations after flowers. Be glad you're not in the other squad I've sent towards Korath. They're the Pansy Squadron.

Artanis - sure. Our civilization has over 100 billion registered citizens (and who knows how many unregistered bums), and I need to find job for all of them. So you can have yours.

Hatch will be a nice research world, but nowhere near Kamina. Kamina has a tech capital, AND a x8 research tile. Remember that special tiles influence only buildings that are built on them and not everything on the planet.
My diplomacy is pretty good, but nothing spectacular. The Arcaeans are absolutely awful at it though. The other factor that made a difference here is that Cities of Learning require lots of research points to develop. Which makes them expensive. Which makes them valuable. Makes little sense? Not for the other race leaders!
The Drath are already involved in a war or a dozen, so they don't want to join into this minor squabble. They're also the most powerful civilization around, with Large units built already. But that too will change.
And I know about the pictures. That's why I've decided to spoiler them from the very beginning.

[Artanis]

Yay! I get to be in charge of explosives!


Regarding Hatch II: I may still be used to my typical settings (which have a bit more in the way of planets). On those settings, AFAIK bonus tiles are a bit more spread out, so it's pretty rare to get such a good Sci-world setup on those settings. I saw Hatch II, and my brain automatically registered it as being effectively a fast-starting Class 13 research world, which is pretty damned good.

As for the Drath, I was more referring to their habit of paying everybody to fight each other. A three-sided war where not one of them was paid off by the Drath doesn't happen very often :smallwink:

[Cubey]

You should've seen what was happening during Kif's reign. The Arceans were calling me Kif to let me him know "someone" paid them to attack one race or another every few turns.

[thefinalbattle]

once phase 78 is complete, the complete forces of my penultimate evil army shall destroy you then bring you back for even more eternal torture for calling us daisy squadron.

[chiasaur11]

once phase 78 is complete, the complete forces of my penultimate evil army shall destroy you then bring you back for even more eternal torture for calling us daisy squadron.

I think you made a mistake there.

We're the good guys. Not an "evil army". The eternal torture, however, is within our standard modus operandi.

[thefinalbattle]

who said anything about you being involved.

[Mercenary Pen]

Mercenary Pen - of course you got something wrong here. While I approve of your initiative, I don't think we can have VFs that are almost 300 meters long. I'd have to design Tiny units to fit that role, but I simply can't be arsed to.
Still, your insights are commendable. As your reward, you will receive a pineapple salad.

Okay, make that a small super-dimensional fortress- and I wanted peppermint candy.

I was merely thinking of the missile payloads aboard some of the Veritech fighters, considering the Veritech Alpha fighter can probably outgun entire squadrons of the american F-22 Raptor.

[Hunter Noventa]

Okay, make that a small super-dimensional fortress- and I wanted peppermint candy.

I was merely thinking of the missile payloads aboard some of the Veritech fighters, considering the Veritech Alpha fighter can probably outgun entire squadrons of the american F-22 Raptor.

Valkyries, not veritechs. Heathen. I've been following the thread without saying anything. Awesome thread and awesome looking game I'm going to have to pick up once I get money again.

Can be a Macross Quarter Captin? Or something roughly like that?

[Mercenary Pen]

Valkyries, not veritechs. Heathen. I've been following the thread without saying anything. Awesome thread and awesome looking game I'm going to have to pick up once I get money again.

Can be a Macross Quarter Captin? Or something roughly like that?

My apologies for having only watched the series in english- unfortunately, I've only watched the main series and not had the opportunity or time to track down any of the other Macross series as yet.

[Brother Oni]

My apologies for having only watched the series in english- unfortunately, I've only watched the main series and not had the opportunity or time to track down any of the other Macross series as yet.

May I make some suggestions then?

Macross Plus is the best of the ones I've seen. Imagine Top Gun set in the Macross Universe and you've basically got it. The movie's more coherent and has a better ending, but misses out some of the OAV backstory.

I've heard good things about Macross Frontier, although I haven't seen it.

Macross II suffers from the same problem as the original series - it's very cheesy space opera. Bring crackers or a MST3K mindset if you're not a fan of the genre.

Stay away from Macross 7 unless you don't value your sanity or you're either the biggest Guitar Hero fan around. Actually, come to think of it, Macross 7 would really gel in well with the Spiral's hot blooded fighting spirit combat ethos...

[Mercenary Pen]

May I make some suggestions then?

Macross Plus is the best of the ones I've seen. Imagine Top Gun set in the Macross Universe and you've basically got it. The movie's more coherent and has a better ending, but misses out some of the OAV backstory.

I've heard good things about Macross Frontier, although I haven't seen it.

Macross II suffers from the same problem as the original series - it's very cheesy space opera. Bring crackers or a MST3K mindset if you're not a fan of the genre.

Stay away from Macross 7 unless you don't value your sanity or you're either the biggest Guitar Hero fan around. Actually, come to think of it, Macross 7 would really gel in well with the Spiral's hot blooded fighting spirit combat ethos...

All available in english? Unfortunately, I have little to no Japanese, nor the resources to learn at the moment. But yeah, I have a ton of Macross and Gundam on my list of anime to watch anyway.

[Cubey]

Do I see Macross discussion? Here's my input to the matter.

The original series really isn't that cheesy. I find it pretty "normal" and realistic. It must've been really great when it was made and it's still fun even today. The only MST3k factor in it comes from absolutely horrendous, low-budget animation whose quality was bad even by early 80s' standards.
Do You Remember Love is a movie retelling of the first Macross. It's much more melodramatic and a spectacle, and since a lot of episodes got compressed into a 2.5 hour long movie then you miss out on characterisation and screentime for some funny or awesome characters. It apparently exists in-universe as a propaganda movie that explains what happened in the series. So expect to see differences between DYRL and the first show.
I didn't watch Macross II.
Macross Plus has really arseholish characters and the plot is barely there. But it's still a great OVA. You watch it for the music, the atmosphere, and great dogfights.
Macross Seven is cheesy in the G Gundam way. It's the weakest series, but also has the greatest music. It's not bad, just... average. Except for the music. It's awesome. Did I mention the music yet? It's the only series from the list that wasn't officially translated into English.
Macross Zero is very nice. Imagine Full Metal Panic! crossed over with Neon Genesis Evangelion. CGI dogfights though. I don't like that. But the OVA is still nice.
Macross Frontier is probably the best of the non-OVA Macrosses. Also the most modern. It plays with Macross conventions so if it's your first title from the series you miss out on some interesting stuff, but it's still watchable. Dogfights are still CGI - urgh. The only downside to an otherwise great show.


Okay, back to GalCiv reality. Whomever wants a job as a captain or pilot, gets it. But be patient - I actually have to construct a unit for you first.

[Mercenary Pen]

Yeah, sounds like I can cope with most of the Macross stuff then (if and when I find time)... I've even seen Robotech: the shadow chronicles, so I can definitely handle CGI dogfights.

[Tengu_temp]

Okay, time to join in and be the cool aniki Fri can look up to! In order to do that I need a more impressive machine than him, though, so sign me up as a ship captain.

[The Glyphstone]

Incoming transmission from Epas I:


Duuuuuuuudes.....these Vegans are like, the best minor race EVER, man. They're, like, total pacifists, spend all their time talking about 'free love' and inhaling the totally sweet fumes produced by burning this awesome plant they grow all over the place...awesome....All their food's made from it too, and it tastes nasty, but breathing in the smoke you get from burning it feels totally radical, duuuuuudes. We should like, totally subjugate them and start growing this sweet stuff for ourselves - someone who's totally not radical must have swapped out all my booze for juice before I left, cause I can't get drunk at all, but this completely radical plant-smoke-stuff like, totally makes up for the feeling...

[Fri]

Oh supreme leader you brilliant bastard. Teasing us with such a cliffhanger! Can't wait for the next chapter!

Terra's design for the city of learning is surprisingly useful for our civilization, both in a way she intended and the way she didn't intended...

and it seems that we need to send Glyphstone to Korath region again. Do they still have the 'happy happy fun fun interplanetary torture summit' ?

[Cubey]

and it seems that we need to send Glyphstone to Korath region again. Do they still have the 'happy happy fun fun interplanetary torture summit' ?

Yes. Very much so.

[Blayze]

Recent developments in missile weaponry have led me to believe that the importance of superheating alien faces and melting their spaceships around them has become at least partially ignored. To that end, I submit for your approval, Supreme Leader, the right to reassign my post of Minister of Lasers to a spaceship. Preferably one brimming with weaponry -- or failing that, some form of wormhole technology allowing other, smaller vessels to pass through and assault our hated enemies.

I couldn't decide whether the idea should be called the Tulip or Chulip, though. I'll leave that to you. I also request Kif's assistance. Tell him the flower motif means it's to do with peace. That'll calm the hippy down.

[Cubey]

Good thing I've decided all my capital ships (Large and Huge) will be named then.

[kamikasei]

How many such ships does a game generally involve? We should start a name pool.

Lying Bastard
Zodiacal Light
i said, i've got a big stick
Liberator

[Tavar]

That really depends on how you play the game: I recently just won a game with my only real military ship being the Flagship. I did have some Military Tech, but I only researched it right before I started the Tech Victory Reasearch. On the other hand, if you go the militaristic route, then you can use quite alot.

[Redpieper]

I really like this let's play, but I've got one problem with it.
For a story driven Let's play, there's no tension.
Everything just seems like a piece of cake really. :smallfrown:

I don't know if that's just me, as said before I really enjoy this let's play.

*lurk mode activated*

[chiasaur11]

How many such ships does a game generally involve? We should start a name pool.

Lying Bastard
Zodiacal Light
i said, i've got a big stick
Liberator

Well, we could use some good names from other fictions and/or Culture-y names.

The Ends Of Invention
Two For Flinching
Unfortunate Conflict Of Evidence
What Are The Civilian Applications?
What Little Gravitas We Can Muster
Manus Celer Dei
Friday
Skuttlebutt

Just what I could get quickly.

[Cubey]

Note that the units' names are limited in possible length, so the longer ones are out. Fortunately, since I know how my Large design will look like (I won't spoil it for you yet), there's a fitting naming theme I have just in mind.


For a story driven Let's play, there's no tension.
Everything just seems like a piece of cake really. :smallfrown:

It's a 4X game. There's no actual story, except for when it makes a better joke.
As for tension, it could be that I'm playing on a difficulty level that's just too fair. The AI, while smart, is still artificial. Without an unfair advantage you can beat it. But the problem with GalCiv is playing on a higher, "balls to the wall" difficulty level too often means you get a Bad End. That wouldn't make a very fun LP to read. Still, I'd say enough bad things happened (and even more is to happen) and the game is not a total walk in the park.

Hope that answers your concerns.

'Sides, DeceasedCrab made a Civ I Let's Play on Chieftain and it was fun too.

[Mercenary Pen]

I'm not gonna be much use for humourous warship names, because I tend to stick to the naming patterns of the imperial navy from Star Wars and Royal Navy on Earth.

However, I'll give it a try:

I say we call it "Your Grave"
Millennium FanCon
You killed my father- Prepare to die.

[Redpieper]

It's a 4X game. There's no actual story, except for when it makes a better joke.
As for tension, it could be that I'm playing on a difficulty level that's just too fair. The AI, while smart, is still artificial. Without an unfair advantage you can beat it. But the problem with GalCiv is playing on a higher, "balls to the wall" difficulty level too often means you get a Bad End. That wouldn't make a very fun LP to read. Still, I'd say enough bad things happened (and even more is to happen) and the game is not a total walk in the park.

Hope that answers your concerns.

'Sides, DeceasedCrab made a Civ I Let's Play on Chieftain and it was fun too.

Ah I phrased myself poorly, what I meant was that with a run of the mill shooter let's play and what not. There's the story of the game to follow with added in content from the person playing.
However here the only story is the one you craft yourself, and my impression from what I read and saw (did not play the game) was that it seemed very easy.
Hence any tension flying out of the window for me.

But I've complained long enough, I may make it out to be worse then it is. So far it's been pretty awesome :smallsmile:
Except the lost data, grrr damn data vampires.

Keep up the good work.

[DeafnotDumb]

I really like this let's play, but I've got one problem with it.
For a story driven Let's play, there's no tension.
Everything just seems like a piece of cake really. :smallfrown:

I don't know if that's just me, as said before I really enjoy this let's play.

*lurk mode activated*

Tension? What are you talking about? Spirals always triumph gloriously! All that depends is how many named characters we lose along the way.

Also, I was glad to see that my suggestion for ship improvements was heeded. If there's ever an opening for me to actually use one of those magnificent gods of Dakka, then I'll take it and give my job to someone saner.

[Destro_Yersul]

Man, this makes me want to play this game again. Too bad I don't have any of the expansions...

Maybe I can get them next time I go out. They shouldn't be too expensive. If I can find them.

[Mercenary Pen]

My work for NaNoWriMo is making me understand exactly how difficult interstellar diplomacy is... much easier just to blow the other side to atoms and shrapnel.

I just need to wait for an appropriate time for my interstellar diplomacy to have its pre-arranged breakdown so that I can get the Hyperspace-accelerated Plasma Cannons and Plasma Pulse Missiles flying.

It's a little like the difference between the leadership styles of Kif and Cubey in some ways.

[ObadiahtheSlim]

Can I claim a position as a Space Station Commander? Maybe I can die in an epic blaze of glory to further our majestic Spiral Republic.

[kamikasei]

You can buy it online. The two expansions bundled for thirty bucks, or throw in the game too for forty total. I'm tempted myself.

[ObadiahtheSlim]

You can buy it online. The two expansions bundled for thirty bucks, or throw in the game too for forty total. I'm tempted myself.

Are the expansions stand alone or do you have to already own the core game before you can buy the expansions? I don't have the game anymore cause I only borrowed it from a friend.

[Tavar]

Also, you can download Impulse, and buy it from stardock through there.

I believe that the expansions are not standalone, though I'm not sure about that.

[Destro_Yersul]

Online would be awesome if I had a credit card. I don't.

[kamikasei]

I would assume they require the original game. Just Google for it and see.

[Cristo Meyers]

Online would be awesome if I had a credit card. I don't.

I've seen the expansions at Best Buy on several occasions.

I, unfortunately, have neither game nor expansions...something I am now going to have to rectify...

[Cubey]

Chapter VIII: War is a dangerous place

Seems we have a two front war on our hands. Luckily, my new units will protect me! Or will they? A Ship Ganmen was built on Kamina and sent against the Jessuins to find out.
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/9817/0801jessuindoom.png
I'd say it did good enough.

Remember what I told my scientists to work on last time? Getting one with the ship you pilot? Look at this, the research is completed.
http://img246.imageshack.us/img246/5134/0802newtypes.png
Let's read the description again. That's right. From this day now on, we are no longer just Spirals. Now we are Newtype (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Newtype) Spirals. Our enemies? They're f***ed.

While the Ship Ganmen was busy destroying all aggressive Jessuin units in sight, my anti-Korath forces started to gather at the border. This is as far as they go for now - the Ganmen can't get any closer to the Korath until a starbase is built to increase their range. And of course, the Daisy Squadron made it to the meeting point first.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/2051/0803armyatborder.png

At the same time, other races weren't neutral to the conflict. The minor race of Paulos provided me with support.
http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/9943/0804paulosgiveships.png
Space ships? Why, thank you!

And a mysterious third party decided it'd be fun to send some spies to sabotage me. Now that kind of help, I could live without.
http://img406.imageshack.us/img406/5028/0805morespies.png

Let's take a look at the mighty and powerful fleet that the Paulos decided to lend to me.
http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/8771/0806paulosfighter.png
Okay. One crappy fighter. Sucks to be me for having my hopes up. The most sensible thing to do with this flying piece of junk is to scrap it and sell the materials.
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/7613/0807decomission.png

Since my Medium-sized unit managed to single handedly destroy the whole Jessuin fleet, I'm sending a transport to conquer the homeworld of these treacherous, yet minor opponents.
http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/2945/0808combatjessuins.png

The tactic I'm using is same as always - propaganda war will make the discontent join my side, and after that we're sending Kif in and he either finds no resistance left or dies horribly in a hail of enemy laser fire. I expect it to work even better here than usual - unlike the Snathi or Dark Yor, Jessuins are more or less normal living beings. They stop fighting when wounded, their morale falters and they sometimes even surrender. Total obliteration is not necessary here, no matter what Chiasaur tries to tell me via a constantly yelling commlink.
http://img255.imageshack.us/img255/3463/0809jessuinsconquered.png
http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/1369/0810nomorejessuins.png
And we win again. That's the third time Kif defeated an opposing army without even firing a single shot - that man is mighty, I tell you. The Jessuins weren't as tough as they thought they were. I wonder why the war declaration then...

Their planet, now occupied by former soldiers and whomever of the natives that decided to stay with the new government and not run for the hills (they'll return when they get hungry), had a nice surprise for me.
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/5628/0811jessuinplanet.png
An Economic Capital! Like with every Secret Project, I am allowed to build only one, but it doesn't mean I am restricted to having only one of them at the same time. Which means we are having another moneymaking planet right here.

More minor races let me know about how they just love my war with the Korath. The Akilians offer a free spaceship. It's crap like the Paulos' one.
http://img697.imageshack.us/img697/4382/0812akiliansgiveship.png
http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/7075/0813akilianfighter.png

And the Paulos declare war on me. Wait, WHAT?
http://img697.imageshack.us/img697/4486/0814pauloswar.png
Why did you do that? Are you that angry that I decomissioned the fighter you gave me? Do you want me to crush you like I did with the Jessuins? Sure, I can do that, but it doesn't make me happy. You're the ones who are started this war!

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/4403/0815anotherstarbase.png
A new constructor arrived to build a starbase in the place of the previous, destroyed one. My forces can finally advance - towards the Korath worlds! The strike force consists of three squadrons of three Ganmen each, and one larger Ship Ganmen. There are also two transports, full to the brim with battle-ready soldiers but defenseless in space battle. The whole armada cautiously makes it way into hostile territory...

But before they make it far, I receive a message. It has nothing to do with war, however.
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/929/0816nanorecorders.png
I completed a Trade Good. These Nano Recorders are surprisingly cheap for the assistance they provide - more convenience for the nerdier Spirals and thus more research. I was able to make this because of powerful Scanners I've developed - and the same tech allows me to create an even more useful Galactic Achievement. Its completion should come soon, and it will be a glorious day indeed...

But first, the Drath call me to show off.
http://img24.imageshack.us/img24/3974/0817drathshowoff.png
Okay, I know what this project does. As long as there is a war somewhere in the galaxy, the Drath get profits. From secret military contracts, weapons and so on, I believe. In short, you're telling me that because of my war, my sweat and my tears (okay, I didn't cry - yet), you are prospering financially?
Jerk.

But there's no time to argue with dragon aliens, as the Daisy Squadron makes its contact with the enemy!
http://img24.imageshack.us/img24/5717/0818daisystrike.png

This is the first bigger space battle of the Spiral-Korath war, where both sides have more than one unit in a fight.
The Daisies are engaging Korath fighters. Missiles away!
http://img517.imageshack.us/img517/4020/0819battlestart.png

Even Human makes the first kill.
http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/8533/0820battleenemydown.png

Outnumbered and outgunned, the Korath are swiftly destroyed.
http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/4112/0821battlewon.png

You could say we won thanks to superior design, but that's partially true. The Korath are bullies who torment only those weaker than them - they lack real courage and spirit! Facing real defenders of justice, they are sure to fail!
Oh yeah, and they're not Newtypes.

Something tells me space battles won't be a problem, but the invasion itself will be trickier. Korath are quite fierce and they'll be desperate, not to mention their superior numbers. Frisbees for converts can only get you so far, so the witchdoctors are thinking of new methods of waging warfare.
http://img263.imageshack.us/img263/4981/0822newrobot.png
Such as a Colony Drop!
Wait...
This robot is new. The anchor used to be Crow T Robot's sister, now it looks more like one of Tom Servo's many cousins. Why did it change?
The answer is: we are officially leaning towards Good now. My selfless and impractical decisions made everyone stop perceiving the Spirals as self-serving Neutral bastards, and start as altruistic and just as they really are. Hence a new robot to represent this. But is really Tom Servo more good than Crow? I'm not sure.

http://img410.imageshack.us/img410/7489/0823eyesofuniverse.png
And the Achievement I spoke of earlier is completed! Eyes of the Universe let all Spiral ships see REALLY far away. No one is sneaking up on us anymore! I also get a memo - some race declared war again. Who could it be?

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/6193/0824akilianswar.png
Okay. Once again I have to ask - why? Is it because of your fighter? It wasn't technically yours anymore, you know! You are aware how powerful we are - don't pick a fight with the Spirals if you know what's good for you!

That's a second Minor Race that started a war with me despite having no reasons to do that. I don't like this new trend and I have to stop it. Maybe it will end if I let everyone know how Good we are.
http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/3576/0825weturngood.png
No, this option didn't appear just because I though it'd be convenient. I had to research appropriate technology first - or, as it may be in this case, obtain it from some other race in exchange for tech they have no use for. Each of these options gives the race several different benefits, so even being Evil is better than remaining undecided. Except that then we'll come to kick your arse, of course. Well, being Good is the way with the Spirals so we're going with that. Also, due to past decisions it's also the cheapest choice to make at the moment. Anyone saying Good is impractical? Ha ha ha!

http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/2781/0826warpositions.png
And this is how the map looks with the Eyes of Universe built. All my squadrons are aware of everything in such a radius you'd expect the pilots to have some kind of sixth sense. Which they do - Newtypes, remember?

We didn't have a Council meeting in a while. Is it time for another one?
http://img265.imageshack.us/img265/5831/0827council.png
It is. I control over half the votes (I already have a theory on why it is so - I'll let you know once I confirm it), so other races must enter some kind of mega-coalition in order to overthrow my decisions. My word is LAW! And good, because I don't like the proposal here. I like my starbases to have lots of modules, thank you very much.

http://img260.imageshack.us/img260/2339/0828lentzwar.png
And another Minor Race declares war on me. It's LentzLandians now. Being Good doesn't help, they're still out for my blood. Why, I ask. Why?

http://img231.imageshack.us/img231/6285/0829nowiknow.png
This is why. See the lowest relation factor? "Tendency to conquer others". Because I defeated Dark Yor and Snathi before they could become a real threat and drown the galaxy in everyone's internal fluids, I now have a reputation of a ruthless conqueror. The minor races fear me and are afraid they'll be next. That's why they are declaring war - they want to protect the galaxy against a power-hungry menace. That is, me.
SINCE WHEN AM I THE BAD GUY HERE?

Okay, this has to change. From now on, it's all Love and Peace. I'll prove my good intentions by ending all wars I am waging. Except for the one with the Korath. Not only are they unwilling to stop themselves, I know they started it because they're evil and not afraid of me. Because, and it's no big secret, the Korath aren't afraid of anything.
http://img18.imageshack.us/img18/3783/0830makepeace.png
Paulos are the only one who are willing to talk with me at the moment. But they're so happy to stop fighting (not that we had a single battle between each other...) that they threw in some cash as a peacemaking gift. Nifty.
Besides, it's not that I'd ever have the heart to conquer the Paulos. They are probably the most unlucky race in the universe. How unlucky? See for yourself.
http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/8471/0831paulosbadluck.png

And for a change of the mood, bad news.
http://img91.imageshack.us/img91/8030/0832stillouttarange.png
The starbase is providing support, but it is still not enough for my units to reach Korath planets. It's almost enough, but almost makes a difference. Okay, the transports have additional life support and the Korath are in their range, but without any weapons they won't destroy defensive fleets that orbit around the planets. Instead, they'll go down in flames, burning in the atmosphere - that's not my idea of how troop transport works.
Additional measures must be taken.

http://img691.imageshack.us/img691/61/0833harmonycrystals.png
This is not one of these measures, but it's still awesome. Harmony Crystals make my citizens even happier than they already were. And they work civilization-wide, since it's a trade good. Now every Spiral can buy their own crystal and use it to keep themselves content, relaxed and in harmony with the universe.

See, I knew sending The Glyphstone to these Vegan hippies was a good idea!

Since my squads cannot reach the Korath homeworld yet, they spend their time blowing Korath units out of the sky. En masse.
http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/5459/0834wargoesokay.png

We even find a real treat, destroying which is a real insult to the whole Korath race.
http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/5128/0835korathflagship.png
Their flagship! But will we manage to actually shoot it down? Well, since it has no weapons, I'd say the fight is pretty one sided. Try exploring anomalies now, monkey face!
http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/7273/0836bothsideslose.png
But one of my scouts decided to be an idiot again and flew straight into enemy formation, with predictable results. Okay, so we both lose one surveying unit each. The difference is, I can make more.

"I can make more" is what the Korath should say here though, not the Spirals. What they lack in skill, courage and technology, they make up in sheer numbers. And when I say sheer, I mean it.
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/5540/0837hugestack.png
Each of their battle groups can do very little to my Ganmen before turning into missile-ridden space dust, but the attrition of losing 1-2 hp per battle may eventually add up into something major. I'd rather not waste units like that. Let's finish this as soon as possible. Which means - as soon as range-increasing tech is completed.

While the scientists are busy, I'm making amends and signing peace treaties with minor races.
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/134/0838makemorepeace.png
Sorry for starting a war? I bet you are. But know my forgiveness. Let's be friendly again. Ah! A gift for me? You really shouldn't have. Not going to say no though. That'd be rude.

Diplomacy is FUN! Now I only have to wait until my Ultimate Life Support designs are completed. Then my squadrons will be able to finish off the defenders of Korath worlds, Kora and Kora II.
Wait a second. The three Ganmen squadrons are in Korath territory. So is the Ship Ganmen.

Who is defending my starbase?

http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/4408/0839starbasethreatened.png
Damn it! Not only is the answer "no one", a Korath group is on its way to demolish it like they did with the last one! Without the starbase my units will be forced to retreat, out of my support's range. The Korath are arriving at the base in one week, and it will take at least four times as much for the closest Ganmen to intercept them!

The whole campaign is on the verge of failing, or at least stagnating into who-knows-how-many-more months of stalemate. All because someone was careless and left a single starbase unattended. And I know whose fault is that.

KIF!!!

What's next: I find a solution to this tricky situation! Maybe.

[chiasaur11]

I never said diplomacy wasn't A solution, I said it wasn't the best solution.

For example, it encourages hippies.

[Mercenary Pen]

I never said diplomacy wasn't A solution, I said it wasn't the best solution.

For example, it encourages hippies.

Yes, hippies that we can send The Glyphstone to meet, bringing back ideas from which we can produce new trade goods, the proceeds from which can fight our mighty war efforts...

Try paying attention, o rattler of sabres.

[Terraoblivion]

And as you can all see our great dedication to expanding the minds of the Spirals has made them awaken their latent psychic powers. Once again knowledge and learning shows its superiority.

[Mercenary Pen]

And as you can all see our great dedication to expanding the minds of the Spirals has made them awaken their latent psychic powers. Once again knowledge and learning shows its superiority.

Back to your textbooks and experiments... Every second you spend bragging about the superiority of knowledge is a second we could be getting closer to the next technological advance.

[SlyGuyMcFly]

Even Human makes the first kill.

YIPPEE KAY-YAY MOTHERLOVERS!

[Terraoblivion]

I'm too lazy for that Mercenary Pen. Besides i need to point out why i need more funding.

[chiasaur11]

Back to your textbooks and experiments... Every second you spend bragging about the superiority of knowledge is a second we could be getting closer to the next technological advance.

Like orbital bombardment!

Good idea, that one. Combine it with simultaneous troop strikes, and we can easily reduce planets to charred husks within hours!

[Mercenary Pen]

I'm too lazy for that Mercenary Pen. Besides i need to point out why i need more funding.

*puts on hat of minister for finance- because it's his week on holiday and he asked me to cover for him*

Would this have something to do with the 'research into the effects of fine dining for a year on the faculty of a major city of learning' project that was submitted last week?

[thefinalbattle]

permission to yell out "w00t!" at the first victory of our squadron, supreme leader?

[Terraoblivion]

Well, not that one specifically...

[Mercenary Pen]

Well, not that one specifically...

Then was it perhaps the "what effect will it have on learner morale if we plate our biggest city of learning with real gold" project?

Has anyone noticed exactly how expensive researching anything has become these days?


permission to yell out "w00t!" at the first victory of our squadron, supreme leader?

Only if you can do it with the power of just your mind.

[Blayze]

Has anyone noticed exactly how expensive researching anything has become these days?

Don't forget the Perpetual Lack of Motion Machine that is researching how to research stuff slightly faster.

Also, clearly that starbase needs lasers. Or at least a rapid solution involving buying the enemy fleet heading towards it.

[Cubey]

permission to yell out "w00t!" at the first victory of our squadron, supreme leader?

Permission granted.
Of course, that was your first victory but nowhere the last, even during that update. The Daisy Squadron already destroyed like 10 times their mass in evil Korath spaceships.

[Mercenary Pen]

Don't forget the Perpetual Lack of Motion Machine that is researching how to research stuff slightly faster.

Yes, that was one of the previous Minister of Finance's bigger funding blunders, although arranging for his pet goldfish to receive at tax rebate was quite inspired.

Needless to say, I am consulting with Chiasaur on ways to make certain his holiday from office becomes permanent- and they involve missiles.

[chiasaur11]

Yes, that was one of the previous Minister of Finance's bigger funding blunders, although arranging for his pet goldfish to receive at tax rebate was quite inspired.

Needless to say, I am consulting with Chiasaur on ways to make certain his holiday from office becomes permanent- and they involve missiles.

Well, most of them do.

The "Nova Bomb" prototype is also promising.

[Mercenary Pen]

Well, most of them do.

The "Nova Bomb" prototype is also promising.

I was more interested in the singularity grenade.

[chiasaur11]

I was more interested in the singularity grenade.

That one's still in beta.

[Mercenary Pen]

That one's still in beta.

Yup, some problem about getting the miniature black hole to close up again after we're done with it, rather than continuing to devour the rest of the planet.

[Blayze]

I hear the Terrans might have finally finished their LHC black hole creation project. Might want to look at trading for that.

[Mercenary Pen]

I hear the Terrans might have finally finished their LHC black hole creation project. Might want to look at trading for that.

Creation's not the problem. Getting rid of the thing afterwards is the problem, and that's decidedly more tricky than making a black hole (or so my technical lunatic tells me).

[Flickerdart]

Nonsense. You must simply make a larger black hole to consume the first one, and there's your problem solved.

[Mercenary Pen]

Nonsense. You must simply make a larger black hole to consume the first one, and there's your problem solved.

That's a negative, you still want the use of this galaxy at the other end of the process, don't you?

[AgentPaper]

Obviously you just make an even bigger black hole to consume that one, too. And so on. Eventually you'll get the whole universe into a single point, which will then re-create the beginning of the universe*. And then history will repeat itself* and we'll be back to right before the black hole was created, and there you go, no more black hole!

I say we go ahead with the project. I mean, if out great ancestors had stopped to think that the Even Larger Hadron Collider might cause the destruction of the earth, then we would never have progressed in science as much as we have. The following destruction of the earth and the Sol system was a small price to pay for finding out what we did that day. (Note to self: Learn what we accomplished that day)

*Probably.

[Mercenary Pen]

(Note to self: Learn what we accomplished that day)

What was accomplished that day was the discovery of Squiffions, sub-atomic particles which, when highly concentrated, cause perfectly neat things to look untidy.

[thefinalbattle]

permission to blow a trumpet to wake everyone up, supreme leader?

[Mercenary Pen]

permission to blow a trumpet to wake everyone up, supreme leader?

No trumpets please, I want sinister sounding organ music instead... Try something along the lines of Phantom of the Opera, that'll wake them up.

[Pie Guy]

permission to blow a trumpet to wake everyone up, supreme leader?

Nah, I'd suggest blowing up a trumpet.

[Hunter Noventa]

Nah, I'd suggest blowing up a trumpet.

Mythbusters did it first. I say construct about a thousand cannons that happen to look like trumpets, then firing them all at once.

[Mercenary Pen]

Mythbusters did it first. I say construct about a thousand cannons that happen to look like trumpets, then firing them all at once.

Regular cannons or beam cannons?

[thefinalbattle]

witch is louder?

[AgentPaper]

witch is louder?

Well, we're using them in space, so I'd say the cannons since there's nothing between it and you to block the sound, while the humming of the laser, while possibly louder, have the hull of the ship to muffle it. :smalltongue:

[Terraoblivion]

In space it is pointless. Sound requires matter to transfer through, which there is nothing of in space. So whichever we use it will only be heard inside the ship and that is just not the same.

[Cubey]

Chapter IX: Endless fun in the Korath Korner

I had an important decision to take. How to prevent the Korath from stopping my offensive? And the decision must've been made fast. Their ships were approaching my starbase, the single source of my units' support, with every passing hour.

And after a night of uneasy rest, I had a perfect solution in mind.

We will not let the Korath destroy the starbase. I'd sooner demolish it myself! And that was my plan. The transports are returning home, so they won't fall prey to stray fighters. They're fast anyway, return won't last more than a few weeks for them. But the Ganmen aren't moving a step. Even if they can only drift helplessly in space without support, that's what they are going to do - drift helplessly in space until help, in the form of a new starbase, arrives. And if anyone decides to attack them, the Ganmen pilots will repel the attackers with sheer Spiral Power and manly spirit.

Compliments are not necessary. I realize how brilliant my decision is.
Good bye, starbase. Your personnel is evacuated and all that is left is to flip the self-destruct switch. I'm letting the starbase commander, who just happens to be the newly rediscovered Celesyne, do the honors.
http://img36.imageshack.us/img36/6199/0901takingthebasedown.png

No turning back now.

I've noticed that, no insult to Terra intended (like I'd dare to), but even with Cities of Learning our spirit of evolution simply doesn't fly fast enough. I need better research facilities, and my friends the Yor just have the appropriate technology. Will they be willing to part with it in exchange for the Cities?
http://img697.imageshack.us/img697/3930/0902takeallyotech.png
Yup. In fact, they were willing to part with ALL their tech in exchange for the Cities. Really good friends, the Yor are.

Also, we develop another trade good.
http://img690.imageshack.us/img690/2575/0903microrepairbots.png
Micro Repair Bots do just what you'd expect from their name. And it's exactly what I need. Ganmen that repair faster are Ganmen that won't be shot down by weaker but more numerous opponent. You may ask: How do I expect the bots to arrive to all my units instantly, even the ones floating powerlessly in space?
Magic. Magic of Spiral spirit.

Thanks to the Spiral big brains' creativity, the ultimate Life Support technology is perfected the same week! It even comes with a lame marketing slogan.
http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/5875/0904lifesupportproc.png
http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/4650/0905lifesupport.png

But even with this tech, my squads are still out of range. Gotta build that new starbase. I told my designers to slap as many engines on a constructor as possible. They weren't as happy as if I told them to do it with guns, but judging by the result, happy enough.
http://img524.imageshack.us/img524/1179/0906thisconstructorhass.png

Several weeks passed already, and how are my stranded units holding out?
http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/1592/0907myunitsholdout.png
Pretty well, considering they haven't been attacked yet. Maybe the Korath don't realize the Ganmen are out of range and thus absolutely helpless. And that's good for me. It'd be too much of a danger if they attacked...

Aha! I knew the Korath would try to attack as soon as I said something like that. But it was a trap - although immovable, my units are still as powerful as ever, their weapons and defensive systems maintained by nothing but pure courage and determination. Don't mess with Spiral Power. The units I left behind are Pandora's Boxes. Leave alone, do not open. Or you'll suffer.

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/2962/0908iammakepeace.png
Suffering for the Korath, but peace for LentzLandians. I'm taking whatever you're willing to offer, but it's all voluntary. You could be willing to give me nothing and I'd still sign the peace treaty. Really.

I need to sound less threatening. At this rate they'll just soon declare the war again.

http://img301.imageshack.us/img301/5325/0909altariansfindships.png
And the Altarians make a galaxy-changing discovery. Ancient Precursor spaceships were found, their power undoubtedly beyond wildest imagination. I have to locate and assess these ships as soon as possible, but I'm mentally preparing myself for future trouble. Altarians are nice and cuddly only to those stronger than them. And with this, few civilizations will remain stronger.

My doubts about the LentzLandians became reality. They declare war.
http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/8167/0910lentzfightkorath.png
But on the Korath! Was their leader, Harold Gibons the Third, so moved by my peace declaration that he decided to aid my side in war efforts? Not that I need help, but the gesutre is appreciated.

And my starbase is erected. I won't let it get destroyed the third time - honest. The Korath planets are now in range and thus doomed. Daisy Squad, attack!
http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/1182/0911korainrange.png
You probably noticed - hitpoints of all three Daisies are above their theoretical maximum. We're going Beyond the Impossible once again folks!

The third squadron, who saw least action but received the least embarassing name in exchange, is sent out to defend the station.
http://img301.imageshack.us/img301/2373/0912squadrondefendsbase.png

And a discovery is made.
http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/6039/0913largescalebuilding.png
The bigger the better. By the time any of my real capital ships exits the spaceport the war will be soon over. But gotta stay prepared for the future. Especially since... nah. I don't want to spoil the surprise.

The Pansies head straight for the enemy capital.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/8164/0914pansysquadwins.png
All resistance is steamrolled over, but the Ganmen receive some damage. It's nothing the repair bots can't handle - I'm confident in space victory. What I have to prepare for is land warfare.

http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/604/0915builttirquan.png
A Tir-Quan Training achievement will turn my soldiers into real killing machines. They can now tap into Spiral Energy even when not piloting a robot. They are nigh unstoppable now, and each one's death only fuels others' courage in a heroic sacrifice.

But since I bought the training building outright (the Spiral spirit burns as much as I burn the tax money!) rather than slowly building it, maybe I shouldn't have done so on Dark Yor. It has so many super projects on its surface that there's little to no place left for actual factories. Can't really call it a Manufacturing Capital anymore.

Alas, I can finally catch a glimpse on Precursor warships the Altarians discovered!
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/1214/0916precursorshipsucks.png
Warships, huh? Even the weakest Korath fighter is stronger than this. No wonder the Precursors got wiped out.

http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/9105/0917stillwinning.png
My units busily obliterate everything Korath in sight. Note: one of the kills is a Paulos fighter, but it still belonged to the evil monkeymen. I guess the Paulos give everyone their crappy space ships if they feel like it, not just me.

The battle to destroy Kora's defenders begins! Pansy Squadron will do the honors.
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/2329/0918battleforkora.png
There's a lot of them! The Pansies get serious damage...
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/3177/0919battlecontinues.png
But the Korath explode like so many of their brethren before. Not long after, it's all over.
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/6484/0920battlewon.png

Kora II has some defenders as well, but their numbers are much smaller. Needless to say, they didn't stand a chance.
My transports are on the way, soldiers on board happy they finally get to see some action. With the Korath space fleet defeated, their days are numbered. Now I just need something to kill time.

http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/8400/0921starfederation.png
Developing the final form of democracy good enough? I don't really see the logic of expecting so much out of me when each colony governor has lots of autonomy. Ah well. Keep people content and everything will turn out juuust fine.

The ones who didn't turn out fine are the Korath. Did they really have to start a war against me? Sure, they were much stronger than me when they did that, but past experience tells everyone - never underestimate the underdog!
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/3991/0922militarykorath.png
Whose military is crushed now, huh? Not mine for sure!
No time for taunting though, because the previous chart didn't show the full scale of galaxy-wide power.
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/3126/0923militarydrath.png
My might looks much less impressive now. The orange line high above are the Drath. While everyone was waging war, they were prospering and steadily building their military power. They even have capital ships now. I should be wary of them. The Drath prefer to manipulate others to fight for them, but they're not above declaring war directly if it strikes their fancy. And if previous months are any indication, the Spirals are a popular target to declare war on.

But so far, it's the Korath that everyone piles on.
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/219/0924humansfightkorath.png
What is this going to achieve, Humans? Or Terrans... whatever. Want a piece of the cake for yourselves, huh? Too bad - by the time you arrive on the scene, the Korath Clan will be but a distant memory!

I'm invading the smaller planet, Kora II, first.
http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/5504/0925assaultonkora2.png
Propaganda won't do much here - the locals are too content with their bloodthirsty ways to be swayed so easily. I'm trying out a new approach: use advanced planet-scale tech and drown them!
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/1042/0926kora2get.png
http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/8571/0927allbuildingsdestroy.png
It works pretty well. As a side effect, not only are the Korath swept away by the waves but so almost all their planetary improvements. Hmph - I'll build my own, better ones!
Also, some defenders were left even after the initial flood. My first wave of soldiers got defeated in a nastily gruesome manner. Maybe it's good for Kif that he was on planet Jessuins the time these two transports were getting packed with people. But on the other hand, it means he stays alive for more Chiasaur-related yellings.

I'm willing to give the Korath a second chance. I don't want any more ex-leaders in my closet, thank you very much. I'll sign a peace treaty. But I won't do it for free - I lost good men (and beasts) out there. I want recompensation. There is a Korath-only technological advancement I'm aware of. It's pretty low tier, and increases effectiveness of weapons by a small but visible percentage. Give it to me to sweeten the deal and you're saved.
http://img197.imageshack.us/img197/2408/0928lastofferofpeace.png
Very well! You guys are goners.

http://img196.imageshack.us/img196/4558/0929assaultonkora.png
Even with tortures, executions and gladiator fights to cheer the population up, there is simply too many violent maniacs on Kora's surface to keep everyone happy. Overpopulation is a bitch, and a key to my victory.

http://img41.imageshack.us/img41/576/0930assaultfails.png
But we lose anyway. Almost all defenders are wiped out, but not all of them. The Korath are just too kill-happy. Did you know they're an offshoot from another race, just like the Dark Yor? But unlike Dark Yor, who turned out so Stupid Evil they become totally ineffectual, the Korath actually became more dangerous than the original, still incredibly nasty (and fortunately already extinct in this galaxy) Drengin. It's probably because the offshoot was a conscious decision, a result of genetic engineering performed on the whole Korath Clan.

This digression aside, a minute of silence for the soldiers who failed. Minute's over - let's send another transport! Whomever is left alive on Kora finds themselves surrounded by much less neighbourly squabbling, so they're happier and not susceptible to information warfare anymore.
Time for more drowning.
http://img23.imageshack.us/img23/6884/0931anotherassault.png
http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/8465/0932failagain.png
And we fail again! What went wrong? Bad luck I guess... bad luck or Kif's influence. I won't yell at him for this now. I already have Chiasaur for that. Chiasaur who, to assure success, will lead the next attack personally! And this is totally not a plot to get rid of him!

http://img196.imageshack.us/img196/6650/0933assault3wins.png
Glorious day, Kora is ours! There's next to no survivors - the Korath fought to the last man...ape thing, neither accepting nor offering pardon. It's probably for the better. The war ruined my budget: Buying transports on the place rather than manufacturing them - expensive! Mercenary Pen, my independant military contractor, was happy at least. But what is money, compared to doing the whole galaxy a favor of removing a scourge from its surface!

http://img252.imageshack.us/img252/6060/0934korathnomore.png
Oh yeah, except that now we have pirates. Some Korath spaceships survived here and there and their captains decided to pull up the Jolly Roger flag. We'll deal with them later.

As for Kora itself...
http://img97.imageshack.us/img97/7905/0935koraplanet.png
It will make a nice future research planet. But first I gotta build my own science facilities, removing the primitive ones the Korath had. Apparently they forced their scientists to work in "imagination labs" in extremely crude conditions. No Galactic Net access and only one pizza allowed per day? How barbaric! We're better than that. We just exterminated a whole race (an extremely evil race, but still...), but there are levels to which I will never stoop down.

Next time: A Large update. I'm talking capital ship size here, if you get my drift.

[Mercenary Pen]

Buying transports on the place rather than manufacturing them - expensive! Mercenary Pen, my independant military contractor, was happy at least.

Glad to have sold you quite so much death-tech. At least I've been filling in for the minister of finance to save you money in other places so that you could afford all the weapons I've sold you.

Need any Dreadnoughts, Battle Fortresses for your large capital ships, then I'm probably your man.:smallbiggrin:

[Blayze]

Try something along the lines of Phantom of the Opera, that'll wake them up.

Truth be told, the music most likely to suddenly make people as awake and alert as possible is the infamous Jaws tune.

I'd suggest dropping a moon on the next enemy planet you have assaulted, but I'm afraid I'm having THREE DAYS a bad case of tourette-flashbacks.

[Terraoblivion]

And Cubey the title for this entry leaves me with only one recourse. The way you and the Korath are going on is really long-winded and it has a dancelike aspect in how predictable it is, in fact it seems almost like, dare i say it, an endless waltz.

[Cubey]

And this is why I am afraid of Terra. Her puns are so horrible they could kill a man.

Also, the only music that can penetrate the void of space is obviously the Blue Danube. Or anything by Fire Bomber, but I really shouldn't spoil even more stuff.

[Terraoblivion]

So it has nothing to do with your and Tengu's conditioned fear of me hitting you with a paper fan? Must not have done it enough then. *hits Cubey with one for good measure*

Also only terrible puns are fun.

[Celesyne]

My starbase........... those bastards...

If you don't mind Supreme Leader, I want the biggest, scariest most missile packed hunk of metal you can smash me and maybe part of a life-support system into. These Korath may be gone, but my vengeance shall be wreaked upon all who oppose us!

Or at least the first poor unfortunate bastard I happen to find.

[Mercenary Pen]

Truth be told, the music most likely to suddenly make people as awake and alert as possible is the infamous Jaws tune.

Can we at least try it on a pipe organ, or go with Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner... I'm thinking in terms of sheer volume here, and there isn't much that can compare with a massive pipe organ for that.


I'd suggest dropping a moon on the next enemy planet you have assaulted, but I'm afraid I'm having THREE DAYS a bad case of tourette-flashbacks.

Sernpidal anyone?[/star wars]

[Blayze]

And this is why I am afraid of Terra. Her puns are so horrible they could kill a man

Now that gives me an idea for a new form of genocide.

[chiasaur11]

Ah, now that's warfare. Millions dead in flooding, both in blood and water, using the corpses of our own troops as impromptu barriers against incoming fire...

I'm still washing Korath parts off my boots. Bliss.

[Cubey]

If you don't mind Supreme Leader, I want the biggest, scariest most missile packed hunk of metal you can smash me and maybe part of a life-support system into. These Korath may be gone, but my vengeance shall be wreaked upon all who oppose us!

Sure, but first we'll have to discover your whereabouts again. It seems you got lost in the explosion.

As for Terra-pun weapons... I'll pass. Some things you really shouldn't use, even against the Korath.

[factotum]

No trumpets please, I want sinister sounding organ music instead... Try something along the lines of Phantom of the Opera, that'll wake them up.

I think "Approaching Menace" (the theme music to Mastermind in the UK) would be a good choice. :smallsmile:

[Terraoblivion]

As if my bad puns could be weaponized anyway. And i don't even make anywhere near as many of them as Ikutsuki.

[Destro_Yersul]

As if my bad puns could be weaponized anyway.

Bah. You're no pun. *sunglasses*

[Mercenary Pen]

Bah. You're no pun. *punglasses*

Fixed that for you. Should you need more pun-ishment, just tell me, because I can throw pun-ches with the best of them.

[Nerd-o-rama]

As if my bad puns could be weaponized anyway. And i don't even make anywhere near as many of them as Ikutsuki.Yeah. Cubey even set you up for a pun on "terrapin" there and you missed it.

[Terraoblivion]

It would help if i remembered terrapin as anything but a goofy nickname that Tengu hasn't used in months.

[Nerd-o-rama]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terrapin

It's a fancy turtle, basically.

[Artanis]

My starbase........... those bastards...

If you don't mind Supreme Leader, I want the biggest, scariest most missile packed hunk of metal you can smash me and maybe part of a life-support system into. These Korath may be gone, but my vengeance shall be wreaked upon all who oppose us!

Or at least the first poor unfortunate bastard I happen to find.

Your ideas intrigue me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

Also, you know what's a great way to weaponize puns? Putting speakers on missiles! :smallbiggrin:

[Celesyne]

Personally, my favorite world conquering tactic is: Shooting a metric arseload of missiles at the surface of the planet, you know enough to get one about every...couple of miles. Now, these are special missiles, with no explosive payload. They hit the surface, sit there for a minute or two, and then break down into a VERY large Sound system. They then begin to play "The Macarena" or "It's a Small World" at volumes normally reserved for world shattering nuclear explosions.

Usually, by day 3 everyone on the planet has either surrendered or killed themselves, just to get away from the music.

[Cubey]

Chapter X: Now you're thinking in Bigscale!

The Korath Clan is gone, but some of the race's remnants are still around.
http://img692.imageshack.us/img692/8465/1001piratedefense.png
Mostly pirates, who remain neutral - which means they attack everyone with the same relentlessness. Good thing I've put guns on my starbases. Silly pirates.

http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/3530/1002councilagain.png
Another council meeting. In case you forgot, they happen on a yearly basis. How many did we have already? Eight? The council doesn't annoy me anymore. The law will be passed or rejected depending on my vote only, unless all the other races enter a gigantic coalition. And that's not gonna happen.

Doesn't mean there aren't any ways to annoy me left.
http://img297.imageshack.us/img297/6048/1003spyrush.png
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/4866/1004spies.png
Spies. Lots of spies. Something like 10% of my nation seems to be made of alien spies. I don't know who has sent them, but I have my suspicions. It's probably the Krynn or the Drath. They like spies. I don't - hate 'em.

http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/2773/1005waragain.png
And the Minor Races start waging wars again! Didn't we have a peace treaty not too long ago? Are you trying to get yourselves killed?

Oookay... something tells me the war declarations are far from over. I am simply dying from anticipation to see who will be next. The Paulos, maybe.
http://img44.imageshack.us/img44/5931/1006krynnwar.png
Or the Krynn. Good too.
We just finished one war with a major race, and now we're having another one. Never too much boredom. Sure, the Minors will probably never stop trying to fight me, but that's different. Minor Races are afraid of me. That's why they declare war, but it also makes it easy to sign a peace treaty once they're willing to talk with me again. Major races like the Krynn - for them, my supposed aggressiveness is just an excuse. The Krynn really, honestly want to get rid of me.
And I'll have to get rid of them first. I need the means to do that, and the first one has just been completed.

http://img109.imageshack.us/img109/6571/1007megaarkbuilt.png
A pre-mass production prototype of a Large size spaceship. Parts provided by Mercenary Pen, bless his heartless mercantile ways. Captain - Hunter Noventa, who was really doubting he'd be captaining anything by now. Name of the ship?

http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/4897/1008quarter.png
Rise, Macross Mega Ark Quarter! Its armor system is really unique - remember when I said each alignment offers different benefits? This is one of them. Good races can develop great armor, shields and countermeasures. I'm sending the Quarter out to destroy Krynn fleets before they destroy me. I'm sending out the Daisy Squadron as well - they're in the other corner of the galaxy, but whatever! Fri and pals better be there before it's too late, or else!

An awful lot of stuff happened during the next three weeks. A Galactic Achievement was completed, making my Spiral-powered diplomats even mightier.
http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/601/1010galacticshowcase.png

And three races jumped on the war declaring bandwagon and decided the galaxy would be a better place without me. Can you find the one which is not like the two others?
http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/2972/1009morewar.png
http://img134.imageshack.us/img134/9145/1011drathwar.png
http://img39.imageshack.us/img39/4622/1012minorracewar.png

Bonus points if you said "Drath" even without looking. I guess spies aren't enough for them AND the Krynn anymore. The lizards show they mean business by oblitering my mining starbase.
http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/8963/1013killedmystarbase.png
I feel like I've lost something precious here. The starbase was with the Spirals since I was elected supreme leader. Its sciency bonus was always a big help. And now it's gone. But no time to despair - the base was first, but if I don't do anything then Kamina is next!
So I'm upgrading some of my defending units from their obsolete Beamgun type into something less pathetic.
http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/3074/1014preparingdefense.png

The Akilians (let me repeat: a Minor Race) decide they won't be worse and destroy another of my starbases.
http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/6158/1015starbasefalls.png
At least it had guns to take some of them down first. It burned in a blaze of glory.

I'm going to lose a lot of starbases during this conflict, since they're immobile and usually undefended. I could have built defenses for them in the past if I had spare constructors and foresight to do so, but I didn't. And now it pays off - such is the price of irresponsibility. Who was the irresponsible one? I don't really have to say that. Everyone knows it's Kif.

In order to make sure we have enough dakka for this conflict, the scientists finish designing an... of course! Even better missile.
http://img222.imageshack.us/img222/19/1016evenbettermissiles.png
Doesn't it look just lovely and explode-y? Good news everyone - there's plenty more where that came from.

And while the Daisies didn't arrive on Krynn territory yet, they did reach Drath who were closer and kinda in the way. How will they be able to deal with a larger and more numerous opponent?
http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/1244/1017daisieskickass.png
What, 6 damage received? Do better than that. 6 out of 10 points. Your new assignment - fly around and destroy all Drath units you come across. Leave the Krynn to Mega Ark Quarter.

Speaking of Mega Ark, since we have better missiles now then the model has entered mass production! And this is not an anime, where prototypes are better than MP types. Witness the first Assault class, Mega Ark Dynamite!
http://img130.imageshack.us/img130/3923/1018dynamite.png
Its captain is Tengu_temp, who was constantly annoying me about getting a big ship for himself until this made him shut up. Quendor is very close to Drath territories - you know what to do!

To continue the starbase reports, LentzLandians are trying to do a very stupid thing.
http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/1811/1019lentznearmybase.png
Oh no, you are not going to destroy this base. It is set up in a crucial point and losing it will make me very angry. And that's something you want to avoid. So, before I get angry and unreasonable, let's see if you're not sulking anymore and are willing to talk.

http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/5800/1020lentzpeace.png
Very nice. You know the drill by now - no more war, and if you're willing to give me gifts for wasting my time then it's okay too. Nobody's getting destroyed here. Well, except for the Krynn and Drath.

Speaking of Krynn, how's the Quarter holding up?
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/475/1021quarterkicksass.png
No comment.

I believe the readers deserve to know what exactly we are facing. How strong is our foes' power? We saw it on paper in a boring graph - the Krynn are strong but not as strong as we are, while the Drath... yeah. These guys are to be afraid of. But that was theory, and practical analysis is a different thing altogether.

http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/2193/1022krynnunits.png
The Krynn aren't much better than what Korath were. Their ships are small and armed with basic beams (not as primitive as Korath weaponry though), no armor. They make up for it in giant numbers of swarming tiny craft.

http://img682.imageshack.us/img682/3333/1023drathunits.png
The Drath go for the tank approach. Their units are heavily armored and stack hitpoint adding modules like there's no tomorrow. Their weapons are pretty weak though.

While powerful in theory, this is a specialist design. Unless the enemy is using an all-railgun force with absolutely no armor of any kind whatsoever, the Drath won't be as effective. I refuse to be intimidated by something like this!

Let's take a look at the corner where the Krynn are residing.
http://img14.imageshack.us/img14/3899/1023krynnkorner.png
See the stream of gray icons in the upper part of the map? The Krynn army is coming to crush me. But since the space miner they're after (for some reason) is relatively to them in Kryseth's direction, then maybe they're just going home and decided for some mayhem and destruction along the way.
Unlike the last race I fought, the Krynn are close enough to be in range. A bit too close in fact. Citizens of Snathi and Starbuck are getting worried. And here they thought their internal organs are finally safe after I vanquished the bunny/squirrel thing killers. Well, they must know - the Krynn Korner, set in exactly the opposite end of the galaxy to the Korath Korner, is never safe!

Speaking of Korath Korner, its former occupants left another boon for me. How nice of them!
There were three resources floating nearby. Two of them are for increasing your Influence, and were quickly snatched by the local minor race - no loss, not that I need any more influence... or that they have any use for it, not being in the Council for that matter. But the third resource was much more useful and it simply had to be mine.
http://img91.imageshack.us/img91/9271/1024obadiahmines.png
This starbase, ran by ObadiahtheSlim, extracts crystals that increase the effectiveness of my weaponry. Obadiah is kinda grumpy that his place is totally unarmed despite mining arms itself, but hey. Can't have everything!

http://img30.imageshack.us/img30/9305/1025daisiesattackdrath.png
In the meantime, the Daisies have arrived at the nearest Drath world and, after blowing its defenders out of the sky, are busy intimidating the locals with their terrifying squadron name. Can't do much else without a troop transport, I'm afraid.

And now that I mention a transport...
http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/2269/1026bettertransport.png
Now I can build units that hold up to 2 billion soldiers. Or even more, if I add additional modules to them. This will be useful for my upcoming plan - I've decided to blitz the Krynn, taking over all three of their planets before who knows how many hundreds of their units appear from behind the fog of war.

http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/9297/1027nomnom.png
The second Assault class Mega Ark has been constructed. Mega Ark NomNom - its captain, Yaktan insisted on the strange name. This unit's mission is to intercept dozens of enemy units that are going for Kamina before they can reach my homeworld. Befriend them all - and as everyone knows, the best way of making friends is to kick the crap out of people!

My transport is ready. I might've went overboard - it has place for 4 billion soldiers. And guess what: they're all Snathi! There's not even a single Kif on board!
...
What have I done?!
http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/9664/1028bigtransportonkrynn.png

Let's spy a bit on the Krynn homeworld before the Snathi reduce it to ruin.
http://img407.imageshack.us/img407/4514/1029spyingkryseth.png
I'm sabotaging their command center, but only before the transport gets there. The spies are ridiculously disloyal and will use the slightest opportunity (such as globe-spanning warfare - pfft) to ditch their posts and never come back.

I don't know how to break it to you, but when I said Cities of Research are the best our tech tree can come up with... I wasn't 100% truthful with you. There is one additional building the Spirals can come up with, and since progress is always good but especially needed during warfare, it's damn convenient that we've just finished developing this.
http://img407.imageshack.us/img407/1369/1030communesresearched.png
Like Tom Servo here says, they're limited to one per planet. They don't generate research on their own either, just increase everything else's thinking capacity by 20%.
I hope this is enough as an excuse to stay Terra's hand. Just to be sure, I'm in hiding again.

Since my minister of lasers was disappointed with his lack of work, I organized a different position for him.
http://img4.imageshack.us/img4/3228/1031chulip.png
"Will you stay quiet if I give you a spaceship to command on your own?"
"Full of guns?"
"Yes."
"FIRE FIRE FIREEE!"

Enter Blayze's Chulip. Like all capital ships, I ordered it built for a reason and not just because. Its mission - attack the Drath from an unexpected side.

Oh yeah, I just realized that some of you may be a little lost when it gets to the map of operations. I know where everything is, but necessarily everyone else. And because of that, I prepared a painstakingly crafted map of the known space. As you will be able to tell as soon as you see it, the level of detail is just staggering. Arrows designate movement of units - red are mine, and other colors are for the enemy. Black arrows are planned invasion routes for my transports.
http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/2359/worldmapm.png
Beautiful, isn't it? As you probably realized, I made it myself.

While the Krynn fleets were numerous, their world defense was rather puny. Short work was made of it, and offscreen too. The transport was ready to land and eradicate all resistance. Let's take a look at tools in my disposal, shall we!
http://img694.imageshack.us/img694/5378/1032invadecolonydrop.png
http://img109.imageshack.us/img109/2600/1033invadecoreboom.png
http://img35.imageshack.us/img35/6839/1034invadegassem.png
But since all of this causes loss in planet quality, I'm just going with propaganda warfare. Let's give the Krynn a proper chance to surrender.
http://img5.imageshack.us/img5/7703/1035propagandawins.png
And because of boring but efficient methods, the planet is ours. Not without casualties, but since the soldiers were Snathi, it isn't too saddening. The remaining army isn't saddened in the slightest. The Snathi are simple folk, give them something to kill and they'll be happy. Until now, they were mostly just killing time.

I planned to make this update really long (we're only halfway through), but this looks like a good moment to stop.
Next update: War continues. Also, I have a cunning, secret plan.

[ObadiahtheSlim]

Magistrate's Report:
I am happy to report that mining operations on the weapons crystal has begun in earnest. This should provide the focusing crystals needed to boast our warhead yeild and shield strength. However I can't help but notice one tiny detail that seems to have been overlooked. We are in the middle of a war and my starbase has no defense what so ever. I have put in a request to the nearest shipyard to manufacture additional constructors to be used to boost our defense, but I doubt they listened to me. Perhaps my superiours reading this report could elevate the priority of my request so our mining operation will continue unhindered

Respectfully

Obadiah the Slim.

[Celesyne]

See, I told you the Macarena would work. However, I believe that the Drath would be more susceptible to an infinite loop of Dave Chappelle's Little John skits.

[Fri]

Yeah! The daisy squadrons are kicking ass and taking names, just as we should be!

And Finally, my Aniki got a ship! Big bro Tengu is the only one that's allowed to be awesomer than me. Can we gattai though?

You make this game looks really easy Cubey, really.

and this,

http://img121.imageshack.us/img121/2359/worldmapm.png

Best. Map. Ever

[Cubey]

Obadiah:
Request rejected. The starbase is too far away from enemy territory for unwelcome visitors to be likely. We're sending constructors, but rather than battle stations they will install additional mining modules.
But fear not, your base is far from defenseless. Should an enemy arrive per chance, drive them back by yourself. Prove the power of your Spiral spirit and shout them into submission, or failing that rip the units apart with your bare hands!

Your sincerely,
Kif (Cubey was in the bathroom)
PS. I hate my job. Please kill me.

Celesyne:
See, music is what we usually do to conquer the enemy culturally. As in, make them a part of our civilization without conflict. But things you are talking about... are simply different. You are a dangerous man. Brilliant but oh so very dangerous.

Fri:
Hope this doesn't make the game too easy to be fun to watch. Maybe I just know this game too well for Tough to be really tricky for me. Still, there's stuff I didn't mention that's causing trouble for me. The Drath blew most of my civilian infrastructure (and trade freighters - HATE) out of the sky for example.

[Mercenary Pen]

You know my opinions on the matter, we need another 10 or so Mega Ark-class warships, then we can start work on the schematics for the Supreme Ark-class Battle Fortress.

For example, the Supreme Ark Peekaboo. Because one look should make them run in terror.

[Hunter Noventa]

*dons Captain's hat and pulls out a pipe...*

CAPTAIN! There's no smoking on the bridge!

*glares at his bridge bunny and blows bubbles with his pipe*

It's not for smoking...that's what the blazing hulks of our enemies do!

[Mercenary Pen]

*dons Captain's hat and pulls out a pipe...*

CAPTAIN! There's no smoking on the bridge!

*glares at his bridge bunny andblows bubble with his pipe*

It's not for smoking...that's what the blazing hulks of our enemies do!

Besides, I was only holding it, I wasn't going to light it.

[chiasaur11]

Another day, another civilization completely conquered.

Good times, good times.

[Cubey]

I knew you people would recognize Mega Arks' naming theme. But if I run out of possible names, there's always "Nadesico" or "White Base" as additional options.

The Krynn aren't fully conquered. Yet. We just took their homeworld.


You know my opinions on the matter, we need another 10 or so Mega Ark-class warships

Let me guess - and you want me to buy the parts from your company?

[Hunter Noventa]

I knew you people would recognize Mega Arks' naming theme. But if I run out of possible names, there's always "Nadesico" or "White Base" as additional options.

I have a book full of ship classes and names. They might be a bit GRIMDARK for us Spirals though.

[Mercenary Pen]

Let me guess - and you want me to buy the parts from your company?

Well, if you buy them from somebody else, my company will buy them out. We get your money and provide you with Mega Arks either way- just one way is that much simpler than any of the others.

[Tengu_temp]

Captain on the bridge.

Most excellent - getting this unit was worth all the wait. I'm ready to give orders in the hammiest way possible, not that there will be many of them beyond "full speed ahead!" and "fire all missiles!". I'd also like to request at least one robot girl as a bridge bunny. Preferably not one of those killer Dark Yor, I don't like yandere.



And Finally, my Aniki got a ship! Big bro Tengu is the only one that's allowed to be awesomer than me. Can we gattai though?


No gattai. Shippers already have a field day.

[Fri]

:smallfrown: symmetrical docking then?

[Terraoblivion]

It is too late, Tengu. We already know about the love triangle between you, Fri and Cubey. :smalltongue:

And can you illuminate me on the naming theme of the mega arks? It seems to have escaped me.

[Celesyne]

I really wish someone would just swing by and find me, ya know it gets boring floating out here in these infinite wastes. Suppose I'll spend my time designing new weapons. Like a Cruise Missile armed with large holoscreens and speakers, loaded with Dane Cook comedy (and I use the term lightly) shows set on infinite feed back.

[Mercenary Pen]

I really wish someone would just swing by and find me, ya know it gets boring floating out here in these infinite wastes. Suppose I'll spend my time designing new weapons. Like a Cruise Missile armed with large holoscreens and speakers, loaded with Dane Cook comedy (and I use the term lightly) shows set on infinite feed back.

Yes, but I'm in charge of weapons prototype development around here, and I need figures. And the figures I need include- for this device- mean intelligence loss per afflicted person per hour, modal reduction of sanity, fall-off ratio for sanity and intelligence damage dependent on proximity of the afflicted individual to the weapon, and a whole host of other numbers.

If I am to sell this to our glorious supreme leader, I need those pieces of data.

[Celesyne]

"Cook Missile AKA OHDEARGODMAKEITSTOP"

The typical target will suffer anywhere from 50-175 IQ points of loss depending on the intelligence of said person. The smarter the person, the more devastating.

Insanity will usually begin to manifest approximately 12 1/2 minutes after first contact (for the highly intelligent ) all the way to 1 and 1/2 hours (for the morons).

With the correct equipment a single Missile could affect a 4000 square mile target zone utterly destroying the morale and sanity of the targets in the vicinity.

This is not a weapon to be used against unintelligent enemies, for that severly decreases its effect and may even bolster them. However, drop a couple of these near the tech centers of our main opposition and their research shall come to a screeching halt as the scientists devolve into a fist fight over the last vial of cyanide.

And as an extra bonus, we could manufacture these at a bulk rate, think 10 BCs could purchase upwards of 100 missiles! We could even make them out of the remains of those freaky Dark Yor guys!!

[Flickerdart]

If I am to sell this to our glorious supreme leader, I need those pieces of data.
No, to sell something to a Spiral leader, all you need is the amount of explosions and the degree that number can be increased through sheer willpower.

[Tengu_temp]

It is too late, Tengu. We already know about the love triangle between you, Fri and Cubey. :smalltongue:

Watch out, Rutee is rubbing off on you. Don't you have some unwashed children to educate?


And can you illuminate me on the naming theme of the mega arks? It seems to have escaped me.

They're named after various Macrosses - both the actual units and the series.