PDA

View Full Version : WOTC took that "hybrid race" thing too far



taltamir
2010-01-14, 09:39 PM
a being who has one undead parent is a Gheden...
For example, an elf and a zombie have a baby, the zombie is a "Gheden Elf"

I know having everything as a half dragon, or half human, or even half golem is the cool thing nowadays, but this just went too far

Otodetu
2010-01-14, 09:41 PM
Great for the emerald legion.

Go-go necro-crossbreeding.

Optimystik
2010-01-14, 10:02 PM
Half-dwarves (Muls?) are what broke my brain.

Thurbane
2010-01-14, 10:04 PM
The worst are Halflings...to think that a human would ever breed with a ling! :smallbiggrin:

http://www.komar.org/faq/seward-fishing/alaska-ling-cod/ling-cod-1.jpg

taltamir
2010-01-14, 10:07 PM
The worst are Halflings...to think that a human would ever breed with a ling! :smallbiggrin:

http://www.komar.org/faq/seward-fishing/alaska-ling-cod/ling-cod-1.jpg

lol... have you heard of longfellow halflings? they are what happens when a human and a halfling breed...

to be fair, some halflings are hot.
EX:
http://www.drunkduck.com/Love_Curse/index.php?p=500840

Foryn Gilnith
2010-01-14, 10:08 PM
Aren't longfellow halflings more elven?

SurlySeraph
2010-01-14, 10:12 PM
Half-dwarves (Muls?) are what broke my brain.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.


The worst are Halflings...to think that a human would ever breed with a ling! :smallbiggrin:

http://www.komar.org/faq/seward-fishing/alaska-ling-cod/ling-cod-1.jpg

Don't judge me.

Gamerlord
2010-01-14, 10:13 PM
I thought halfings were what you get when you crossbreed a dwarf and an elf.
:smalltongue:

taltamir
2010-01-14, 10:23 PM
that is a sexy sexy she dwarf!

Mando Knight
2010-01-14, 10:23 PM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.

Aye, lad. I'll na deny it.

Faleldir
2010-01-14, 10:25 PM
According to their religion, halflings are made of the best parts of every other Core race.
"But not half-orcs!"
Oh, they got a part from half-orcs all right. Guess where.

taltamir
2010-01-14, 10:26 PM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

http://www.funnyforumpics.com/forums/Id-Hit-It/1/719-Fist_of_an_Angry_God.jpg

Mushroom Ninja
2010-01-14, 10:52 PM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.


WHERE'S HER BEARD?!?!?!?!?!?!

Touchy
2010-01-14, 10:59 PM
WHERE'S HER BEARD?!?!?!?!?!?!

She's half-human.
And human women don't typically grow beards.

That being said, she should look a bit more... stocky, possibly a bit shorter? :smallconfused:
If you pointed that out to anyone who never even heard of them they would assume those are humans.

Sir Homeslice
2010-01-14, 11:03 PM
WHERE'S HER BEARD?!?!?!?!?!?!

Oh, she has a beard. A bushy one, at that.


http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

http://i539.photobucket.com/albums/ff353/NachtSieger/1208778131014.jpg

Mushroom Ninja
2010-01-14, 11:04 PM
Oh, she has a beard. A bushy one, at that.

But WHERE?????? :smalleek:

Leon
2010-01-14, 11:04 PM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.


This needs to be over in the Dungeons and Dames thread

Looks Great :)

Touchy
2010-01-14, 11:07 PM
But WHERE?????? :smalleek:

She has a homebrew class(gish most likely) who can cast invisible, and casted in on her beard, since she is probably living in human society, not dwarven. Last I checked, most humans like there women beardless, for some reason.:smallconfused:

2xMachina
2010-01-15, 12:08 AM
Can't she just shave...

I mean, it's not that hard... Plenty of beardless men around. Unless being dwarven make their beard have DR?

Touchy
2010-01-15, 12:10 AM
Can't she just shave...

I mean, it's not that hard... Plenty of beardless men around. Unless being dwarven make their beard have DR?

That's too logical, why do it the logical way when we have maaaaggiiccccc.

BobVosh
2010-01-15, 12:13 AM
Can't she just shave...

I mean, it's not that hard... Plenty of beardless men around. Unless being dwarven make their beard have DR?

Dwarves have insurmountable DR on beards. Indeed it is a little known fact is that the dwarf's beard and bones are all that remains for centuries in their tombs.

Beardless men != beardless dwarves. A beardless dwarf is a lost soul, and should he die that way he won't be welcomed in the afterlife.

Sir Homeslice
2010-01-15, 12:22 AM
Can't she just shave...

I mean, it's not that hard... Plenty of beardless men around. Unless being dwarven make their beard have DR?

DR is such a... weak term.

Optimystik
2010-01-15, 12:29 AM
*snip*

You know you would.

Gonna guess you didn't read my sig. :smalltongue:

On topic: If we can have half-elementals, half-constructs and half-outsiders, why not half-undead? Seems the next logical step to me.

Asbestos
2010-01-15, 12:31 AM
Dwarves have insurmountable DR on beards. Indeed it is a little known fact is that the dwarf's beard and bones are all that remains for centuries in their tombs.

And eventually its just the beard. Wait... extremely resistant to destruction fiber-like material found underground? Where have I heard that before... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbestos)

Don't go breathing around a dwarf when he trims those whiskers.

kjones
2010-01-15, 12:33 AM
But WHERE?????? :smalleek:

I'll tell you when you're older. :smallwink:

Starscream
2010-01-15, 12:40 AM
And eventually its just the beard.

Beards can die too. For a beard, heaven is Chuck Norris' chin.

Kris Strife
2010-01-15, 12:52 AM
Looks Great :)

Less Filling

Sorry, couldn't resist. :smallbiggrin:

On a related note, in my short lived stint as a DM, I ruled that female dwarves look like miniaturized Swedish supermodels.

Maximum Zersk
2010-01-15, 12:56 AM
a being who has one undead parent is a Gheden...
For example, an elf and a zombie have a baby, the zombie is a "Gheden Elf"

I know having everything as a half dragon, or half human, or even half golem is the cool thing nowadays, but this just went too far

Something tells me Tsukiko's been busy. :smalltongue:

BobVosh
2010-01-15, 01:05 AM
And eventually its just the beard. Wait... extremely resistant to destruction fiber-like material found underground? Where have I heard that before... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbestos)

Don't go breathing around a dwarf when he trims those whiskers.

Asbestos is made of peopledwarves!!(beards, the only real part of the dwarf)

Touchy
2010-01-15, 01:54 AM
Asbestos is made of peopledwarves!!(beards, the only real part of the dwarf)

The rest of the dwarf is booze storage. Trust me, I'm an expert on dwarves.

Longcat
2010-01-15, 01:59 AM
I've heard undead are great lovers... they never run out of stamina, after all.

As long as you don't get any of those whiny sparkling critters.

SurlySeraph
2010-01-15, 02:17 AM
Gonna guess you didn't read my sig. :smalltongue:

I did. Was there something dorf-related in it that I missed?


On topic: If we can have half-elementals, half-constructs and half-outsiders, why not half-undead? Seems the next logical step to me.

We've already got them. Page 12. (http://www.crystalkeep.com/d20/rules/DnD3.5Index-Templates.pdf) There's also the Death-Touched race, which is to undead as Fire Genasi are to Fire Elementals. If slightly more conceivable.

Optimystik
2010-01-15, 02:23 AM
I did. Was there something dorf-related in it that I missed?

Depictions of women, even supposedly stunning specimens of the dwarven variety, don't sway me very much. So my response to "you know you would" is "no, not really."

(The "LGBT" bit isn't just a pretty decal, you know.)


We've already got them. Page 12. (http://www.crystalkeep.com/d20/rules/DnD3.5Index-Templates.pdf) There's also the Death-Touched race, which is to undead as Fire Genasi are to Fire Elementals. If slightly more conceivable.

I know we have them, as does the OP. His argument was that they shouldn't exist, not that they don't. I was disagreeing.

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 02:26 AM
I've heard undead are great lovers... they never run out of stamina, after all.

What are you talking about? They fail CON checks like crazy.

sonofzeal
2010-01-15, 02:29 AM
What are you talking about? They fail CON checks like crazy.
Unless they get to replace them with Cha checks.



....which makes some sense, come to think of it...

Longcat
2010-01-15, 02:32 AM
What are you talking about? They fail CON checks like crazy.

I thought they were immune to anything requiring a Fort save unless it also worked on constructs? AFAIR, the BoEF system was based upon fort saves, though I could be wrong on that one.

Now excuse me while I'm populating the world with Dhampyrs (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Dhampyr). :smalltongue:

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 02:33 AM
I will not allow you to flood the world with angsty offspring. We shall duel to the death!

Longcat
2010-01-15, 02:36 AM
Ok, let's handle this like grown-ups. By playing a children's card game. In America!

Agrippa
2010-01-15, 02:36 AM
I will not allow you to flood the world with angsty offspring. We shall duel to the death!

Wasn't Blade a Damphyr? I'm just asking.

Another_Poet
2010-01-15, 02:38 AM
(The "LGBT" bit isn't just a pretty decal, you know.)

In all fairness to SurlySeraph, the LGBT icon is stuck on the side of a... what, Magic the Gathering mana quiz result? I think?

Although I know those 12 lines of sig space run out quickly, I'm guessing I'm not the only one whose eyes automatically skip past "My Element is FIRE!" and "Can you feed my dragon?" banners and similar. Not noticing your LGBTitP icon is an easy mistake to make when there's other shiny stuff in your sig :)

Optimystik
2010-01-15, 02:38 AM
I thought they were immune to anything requiring a Fort save unless it also worked on constructs?

That doesn't mean they have a CON score, it just means they can do without one right up until they get disintegrated.



Unless they get to replace them with Cha checks.


....which makes some sense, come to think of it...

Only for Concentration, sadly, though many of the other things that require CON checks (like fatigue or suffocation) don't really apply anyway.


In all fairness to SurlySeraph, the LGBT icon is stuck on the side of a... what, Magic the Gathering mana quiz result? I think?

Although I know those 12 lines of sig space run out quickly, I'm guessing I'm not the only one whose eyes automatically skip past "My Element is FIRE!" and "Can you feed my dragon?" banners and similar. Not noticing your LGBTitP icon is an easy mistake to make when there's other shiny stuff in your sig :)

Fair enough; I do get a bit touchy when people automatically assume flashing boobs at me will somehow change my mind on a given issue, but that's more an IRL pet peeve that I don't have to bring into this thread.

SurlySeraph
2010-01-15, 02:53 AM
Depictions of women, even supposedly stunning specimens of the dwarven variety, don't sway me very much. So my response to "you know you would" is "no, not really."

(The "LGBT" bit isn't just a pretty decal, you know.)

Well, I'm certainly blind then.


I know we have them, as does the OP. His argument was that they shouldn't exist, not that they don't. I was disagreeing.

Not to mention easily confused.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 03:11 AM
WHERE'S HER BEARD?!?!?!?!?!?!

never heard of the bearded beaver?


Depictions of women, even supposedly stunning specimens of the dwarven variety, don't sway me very much. So my response to "you know you would" is "no, not really."

(The "LGBT" bit isn't just a pretty decal, you know.)

LGBT = Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transexual.
So to be fair, he couldn't have known.... only 1 of the 4 explicitly doesn't like women (well, we can't tell for the T).
And actually, I know straight people who brandish the LGBT logo in moral support for their cause. (either that, or I used to date a girl who is a lesbian, bisexual, or transsexual who preferred not to tell me O.o)


I've heard undead are great lovers... they never run out of stamina, after all.

As long as you don't get any of those whiny sparkling critters.

T_T damned twilight ruined vampires forever...

ShippoWildheart
2010-01-15, 03:40 AM
I've heard undead are great lovers... they never run out of stamina, after all.

./brain bleach

Please don't do that again. :smallfrown:

taltamir
2010-01-15, 03:43 AM
./brain bleach

Please don't do that again. :smallfrown:

i don't know... take her avatar for example, it is a sexy gorgeos vampirette; certainly no reason to bleach your brain there...
not all undead are rotting decaying zombies... you can't tell me that you wouldn't want a beautiful vampire as a lover.

plus you know how tiresome it is with mortal women, no stamina at all; they just can't keep up with you...

ShippoWildheart
2010-01-15, 03:45 AM
i don't know... look at her avatar, it is a sexy gorgeos vampirette...
not all undead are rotting decaying zombies... you can't tell me that you wouldn't want a beautiful vampire as a lover.

plus you know how tiresome it is with mortal women, no stamina at all...

But...... but it's cold inside mommy.

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 03:47 AM
Ok, let's handle this like grown-ups. By playing a children's card game. In America!

It's time to duel.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 03:47 AM
But...... but it's cold inside mommy.

Oh god X_X

heh, do it in the jacuzzie

Coidzor
2010-01-15, 03:53 AM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.

...Stupid Sexy She-Dwarf...

Kris Strife
2010-01-15, 03:58 AM
But...... but it's cold inside mommy.

Clearly, you sir, have too much time on your hands.

And possibly a need for some sort of psychological/electroshock therapy.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 04:14 AM
i hope you meant "mummy" and not "mommy"

Thurbane
2010-01-15, 04:31 AM
Depictions of women, even supposedly stunning specimens of the dwarven variety, don't sway me very much. So my response to "you know you would" is "no, not really."

(The "LGBT" bit isn't just a pretty decal, you know.)
Well to be fair, you could be the B in LGBT for all he knew...


...and seriously people, do we have to keep quoting the image? Really? Yes, it's a nice drawing, but we surely don't need to see it umpteen times in a single thread. :smallwink:

PlzBreakMyCmpAn
2010-01-15, 04:56 AM
Beards can die too. For a beard, heaven is Chuck Norris' chin.To bad he kills those - just like everything else!


Wasn't Blade a Damphyr? I'm just asking.So is freaking Blood Rayne. And yea - I'd hit that. And so would my woman...








along with me :smallamused:

Munchkin-Masher
2010-01-15, 04:58 AM
Only for Concentration, sadly, though many of the other things that require CON checks (like fatigue or suffocation) don't really apply anyway.

Undead are immune to fatigue and suffocation.

QED

Androgeus
2010-01-15, 09:05 AM
It's time to duel.

Get you game on? please don't kill me

Weimann
2010-01-15, 09:22 AM
...and seriously people, do we have to keep quoting the image? Really? Yes, it's a nice drawing, but we surely don't need to see it umpteen times in a single thread. :smallwink:Yes, we do.

That said, I'm of the opinion that there are alltogether too many RACES in D&D. I wonder how generic fantasy would have looked like if Tolkien had decided to write about different human factions and not different races.

Dacia Brabant
2010-01-15, 09:25 AM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.

Sure, but she looks like a human. Where's the dorf?


Also, while I agree I don't want to hear about half-zombies or half-ghouls or the like, dhampyrs have made for some excellent characters. Alucard? Blade? Vampire Hunter D?

Blackfang108
2010-01-15, 09:33 AM
Half-dwarves (Muls?) are what broke my brain.

I thought Dark Sun was TSR?

EDIT:


Fair enough; I do get a bit touchy when people automatically assume flashing boobs at me will somehow change my mind on a given issue, but that's more an IRL pet peeve that I don't have to bring into this thread.

Hey, I'm straight, AND a breast man, and it doesn't work on me, either, as my last few GFs found out.

Optimystik
2010-01-15, 09:57 AM
Undead are immune to fatigue and suffocation.

QED

Hence the "they don't really apply" that I mentioned?

deuxhero
2010-01-15, 11:15 AM
snip


I thought Muls were always male and the mother was always a human?

That said, I liked Muls (to the extent I like Dwarfs) better than the rest of the hyrbid because they weren't "lol superior to yuz".

Coidzor
2010-01-15, 01:09 PM
Yes, we do.

That said, I'm of the opinion that there are alltogether too many RACES in D&D. I wonder how generic fantasy would have looked like if Tolkien had decided to write about different human factions and not different races.

<_< Races would actually reflect on RL races rather than demi-species/genii borkedness.

SurlySeraph
2010-01-15, 01:24 PM
Because the tall blonde flawless elves from the North defeating the degenerate southern and eastern orcs has no real-world racial implications. (Note: I do not think Tolkein was racist, and there are plenty of counters in his letters and in Lord of the Rings to such an interpretation, but there are certainly Unfortunate Implications to be found on the first read-through).

Gamerlord
2010-01-15, 01:28 PM
Yes, we do.

That said, I'm of the opinion that there are alltogether too many RACES in D&D. I wonder how generic fantasy would have looked like if Tolkien had decided to write about different human factions and not different races.

You.can.NEVER. HAVE ENOUGH RACES.OR CLASSES.OR ANYTHING.

YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH CONTENT.

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 01:29 PM
YOU CAN NEVER HAVE TOO MUCH CONTENT.
Because the internet is for porn.

Androgeus
2010-01-15, 01:36 PM
Yes, we do.

That said, I'm of the opinion that there are alltogether too many RACES in D&D. I wonder how generic fantasy would have looked like if Tolkien had decided to write about different human factions and not different races.

What are races but humans with some exaggerated and dimmished human traits?

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 01:38 PM
lol... have you heard of longfellow halflings? they are what happens when a human and a halfling breed...

to be fair, some halflings are hot.
EX:
http://www.drunkduck.com/Love_Curse/index.php?p=500840

Halflings will never be hot. Not after I realized they are about the same size and weight of my 3 and 1/2 year old son. From the SRD:

"Halflings stand about 3 feet tall and usually weigh between 30 and 35 pounds"

Adults in the bodies of 3-4 year old children with boobs? Not my cup of tea.

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 01:39 PM
Halflings will never be hot. Not after I realized they are about the same size and weight of my 3 and 1/2 year old son. From the SRD:

"Halflings stand about 3 feet tall and usually weigh between 30 and 35 pounds"

Adults in the bodies of 3-4 year old children with boobs? Not my cup of tea.

Some... people... would...

Blackfang108
2010-01-15, 01:40 PM
Some... people... would...

Bartender!

Another round of Brain Bleach over here!

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 01:40 PM
Some... people... would...

Yes. But not the kind of people I usually hang out with.....hopefully. OTOH Dwarves are about the same height as my fiance so thats cool. Not sure if I'd like her growing a beard tho...

Pharaoh's Fist
2010-01-15, 01:43 PM
Yes. But not the kind of people I usually hang out with.....hopefully.

You never know. ETERNAL VIGILANCE!

Roderick_BR
2010-01-15, 01:49 PM
:smallbiggrin: Next game I want to play an half-dwarf half-elf half-dragon half-zombie.
:smallconfused: "Wait, aren't there, like, 4 halves? He's actually 2? Or is each part a quarter?"
:smalltongue: Shush!


And eventually its just the beard. Wait... extremely resistant to destruction fiber-like material found underground? Where have I heard that before... (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asbestos)

Don't go breathing around a dwarf when he trims those whiskers.
Next release: Book of materials and equipment, with the dwarven beard-woven itens. (btw, nice unintentional pun)

Grumman
2010-01-15, 01:50 PM
Adults in the bodies of 3-4 year old children with boobs?
No, they are not. They are adults in the bodies of adults, but smaller. I mean, you wouldn't start treating the wizard like a child just because they cast Reduce Person, would you?

Another_Poet
2010-01-15, 01:51 PM
Two words for y'all:

Lady. Grey.

Lappy9000
2010-01-15, 01:52 PM
I can't remember the last time a thread actually made me laugh out loud. Good show! :smallbiggrin::smallbiggrin::smallbiggrin:

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-15, 01:54 PM
The worst are Halflings...to think that a human would ever breed with a ling! :smallbiggrin:

http://www.komar.org/faq/seward-fishing/alaska-ling-cod/ling-cod-1.jpg

.....

I'd hit that. Twice, Before I'd bed the undead.

As for the Dwarf. She looks very nice, but also not very dwarfy. Not wide enough.

Just saying >.>

lsfreak
2010-01-15, 01:59 PM
Sure, but she looks like a human. Where's the dorf?

Don't you know? Axes automatically mean dwarf!

Volthawk
2010-01-15, 02:11 PM
.....

I'd hit that. Twice.


Just saying >.>

I hope you mean with a fist.....

taltamir
2010-01-15, 02:14 PM
Halflings will never be hot. Not after I realized they are about the same size and weight of my 3 and 1/2 year old son. From the SRD:

"Halflings stand about 3 feet tall and usually weigh between 30 and 35 pounds"

Adults in the bodies of 3-4 year old children with boobs? Not my cup of tea.

They are in adult bodies, just short adult bodies.
Just view them as midgets.


Hey, I'm straight, AND a breast man, and it doesn't work on me, either, as my last few GFs found out.

Likewise, I am of the opinion that only works in TV... in IRL flashing tits is very different then doing it on TV.


Yes, we do.

That said, I'm of the opinion that there are alltogether too many RACES in D&D. I wonder how generic fantasy would have looked like if Tolkien had decided to write about different human factions and not different races.

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FantasticRacism
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SpaceJews

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-15, 02:15 PM
I hope you mean with a fist.....

I mean in bed, if it was the option between a fish and an undead.

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 02:15 PM
No, they are not. They are adults in the bodies of adults, but smaller. I mean, you wouldn't start treating the wizard like a child just because they cast Reduce Person, would you?

I wouldn't start fondling the Wizard either. He is still mentally the same as an adult (as are the halflings which is why I phrased it that way) so I would play chess with him but being that tiny certainly makes them unattractive. Not to mention the possibility of physical non-compatibility. Better hope the halfling partner is the male...

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-15, 02:20 PM
I wouldn't start fondling the Wizard either. He is still mentally the same as an adult (as are the halflings which is why I phrased it that way) so I would play chess with him but being that tiny certainly makes them unattractive. Not to mention the possibility of physical non-compatibility. Better hope the halfling partner is the male...

So height is that important to you? As for accommodating a larger than normal partner, it would be doable, and more than likely not painfully uncomfortable, (pleasant with practice)but that is going down paths both potentially dark and disturbing.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 02:26 PM
I wouldn't start fondling the Wizard either. He is still mentally the same as an adult (as are the halflings which is why I phrased it that way) so I would play chess with him but being that tiny certainly makes them unattractive. Not to mention the possibility of physical non-compatibility. Better hope the halfling partner is the male...

unless you are the one in a million men with a 12 inch member then physical incompatibility is not an issue... in fact, for many "smaller then average" men this could be a blessing.

And they are not merely MENTALLY adults, they are PHYSICALLY adults.
If anything, the problem is the other way around, since the "good" demihumans live for hundreds of years are aren't considered adults until at least their 50s, sometimes their early 100s... so a 100 year old halfling dating a 20 year old human has some odd implication.

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 02:29 PM
So height is that important to you?

A 3 foot tall person is not attractive to me. Neither is a 15 ft tall person. Maybe if I was those heights they would be but the vast difference in size would make me feel like I was either with a child or was a child (in the case of the 15 ft tall person).

Also the fact that you can quite easily lift the 30 pound halfling is a little disconcerting.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 02:38 PM
I know some girls who are short, shortest is 4' 2''... I know a guy who is 7' 5''

So... would that be the same to you as a 5' human dating a 3'' halfling?

Starbuck_II
2010-01-15, 02:45 PM
unless you are the one in a million men with a 12 inch member then physical incompatibility is not an issue... in fact, for many "smaller then average" men this could be a blessing.


Oh, come on, we aren't that uncommon. I'm sure lots of guys have that size or bigger... right? :smallredface:

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-15, 02:47 PM
Oh, come on, we aren't that uncommon. I'm sure lots of guys have that size or bigger... right? :smallredface:

Most men are around 6 inches. Just saying.

Longcat
2010-01-15, 02:58 PM
Some... people... would...

And that's the origin of Ursinals?


Two words for y'all:

Lady. Grey.

My sentiments exactly :smalltongue:

I mean, who wouldn't want to have a hot undead bisexual lover?

SurlySeraph
2010-01-15, 03:28 PM
:smallbiggrin: Next game I want to play an half-dwarf half-elf half-dragon half-zombie.
:smallconfused: "Wait, aren't there, like, 4 halves? He's actually 2? Or is each part a quarter?"
:smalltongue: Shush!

I have an idea. It involves Dvati.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 03:34 PM
Oh, come on, we aren't that uncommon. I'm sure lots of guys have that size or bigger... right? :smallredface:

You would think; but unfortunately most men aren't as blessed as us...
it was a huge shock for me to find out how small the average man really is :)

Asbestos
2010-01-15, 04:50 PM
Asbestos is made of peopledwarves!!(beards, the only real part of the dwarf)

Man, now I feel bad about having so unceremoniously torn it out of so many buildings and doomed it to landfills. At least all my desecration of dwarven bodies is in the past.

JaronK
2010-01-15, 05:04 PM
Ah, putting the romance back in necromancer. Just remember kids, necrophilia means never having to say you're sorry! Or anything else, for that matter.

JaronK

Jayabalard
2010-01-15, 05:08 PM
Can't she just shave...It's all well and good to weld high heels onto your iron boots, but shaving?

Only Casanunda (the world's 2nd greatest lover; he tries harder) shaves.

Androgeus
2010-01-15, 05:13 PM
So height is that important to you? As for accommodating a larger than normal partner, it would be doable, and more than likely not painfully uncomfortable, (pleasant with practice)but that is going down paths both potentially dark and disturbing.

Yes, going down those paths could be... fatal to say the least.

Longcat
2010-01-15, 05:16 PM
Yes, going down those paths could be... F.A.T.A.L. to say the least.

Fixed it for you.

Faleldir
2010-01-15, 05:18 PM
Don't explain the joke.

Asbestos
2010-01-15, 05:34 PM
Fixed it for you.
Curse you, you ruined the elegant subtlety of the joke.

Time to roll for the ___ of this zombie's ____

Its like Mad Libs, but oh-so-horrible.

Blackfang108
2010-01-15, 05:35 PM
Curse you, you ruined the elegant subtlety of the joke.

Time to roll for the ___ of this zombie's ____

Its like Mad Libs, but oh-so-horrible.

No it's not. Mad Libs lets you CHOOSE what fills in those blanks.

Asbestos
2010-01-15, 05:37 PM
No it's not. Mad Libs lets you CHOOSE what fills in those blanks.

You can choose too, but given where this thread was going I bet it'd be a lot of awful that first comes to mind.

I wouldn't expect "Time to roll for the cut of this zombie's jib" to be the first thing that people thought up.

ShippoWildheart
2010-01-15, 05:41 PM
Clearly, you sir, have too much time on your hands.

And possibly a need for some sort of psychological/electroshock therapy.

Dead bodies lack warmth, so sex with them will...

It's not hard to add 2 and 2 together. That's why I Brain Bleached myself in the first place. I blame Longcat.

Deth Muncher
2010-01-15, 05:42 PM
You can choose too, but given where this thread was going I bet it'd be a lot of awful that first comes to mind.

I wouldn't expect "Time to roll for the cut of this zombie's jib" to be the first thing that people thought up.

Aaah! A dwarf's beard is posting to this thread! :smallbiggrin:

Also, this thread is getting more and more derailed, so I'll try to bring it back before it turns into more bestiality and every man confessing that they're actually Ron Jeremy.

So.

Yes, half-undead are squicky. Unless it's the kind of deal as described on TVTropes where you're a Dhampyre thing, it's a bit much (and even then...). Zombabies are scary (and yes, portmanteau DOES work that way). I always thought the half-human or half-dragon thing was a bit much (since apparently humans mate with anything they can, and dragons just resize to fit).

Blackfang108
2010-01-15, 05:45 PM
You can choose too, but given where this thread was going I bet it'd be a lot of awful that first comes to mind.

I wouldn't expect "Time to roll for the cut of this zombie's jib" to be the first thing that people thought up.

I thought you were comparing F.A.T.A.L. to Mad-Libs.

Androgeus
2010-01-15, 05:55 PM
Ah, putting the romance back in necromancer. Just remember kids, necrophilia means never having to say you're sorry! Or anything else, for that matter.

JaronK


Unconscious chicks may not say no, but dead chicks don't go to the cops after.....

I... I.. think I may need to kill myself for saying that

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 06:02 PM
I know some girls who are short, shortest is 4' 2''... I know a guy who is 7' 5''

So... would that be the same to you as a 5' human dating a 3'' halfling?

Dunno. I'm not either of them. I dont think there is anything inherently wrong about said couplings. I just said that I don't find people with such a large size difference to me attractive. So if I was the 4' 2'' girl I wouldn't want to be with the 7' 5'' guy. If I was the 7' 5'' guy I wouldn't want to be with the 4' 2'' girl.

Thurbane
2010-01-15, 06:19 PM
Halflings will never be hot. Not after I realized they are about the same size and weight of my 3 and 1/2 year old son. From the SRD:

"Halflings stand about 3 feet tall and usually weigh between 30 and 35 pounds"

Adults in the bodies of 3-4 year old children with boobs? Not my cup of tea.
I don't care how small she is, Lidda IS hot!
http://www.enworld.org/Pozas/Pictures/Iconics/lidda.jpg
...I have known a few very short and slight ladies IRL who were very hot, too...

taltamir
2010-01-15, 07:01 PM
om nom nom @ lidda :)

Kris Strife
2010-01-15, 07:17 PM
om nom nom @ lidda :)

I'm guessing you're a fan of Dark Sun?

taltamir
2010-01-15, 07:49 PM
I'm guessing you're a fan of Dark Sun?

who? i just saw a picture with a totally hot halfling girl labeled lidda...

Sstoopidtallkid
2010-01-15, 08:13 PM
Dunno. I'm not either of them. I dont think there is anything inherently wrong about said couplings. I just said that I don't find people with such a large size difference to me attractive. So if I was the 4' 2'' girl I wouldn't want to be with the 7' 5'' guy. If I was the 7' 5'' guy I wouldn't want to be with the 4' 2'' girl.This. (http://richardkiel.com/moonraker5.jpg) Richard Kiel with a girl who is the same height as his IRL wife.

Androgeus
2010-01-15, 08:23 PM
This. (http://richardkiel.com/moonraker5.jpg) Richard Kiel with a girl who is the same height as his IRL wife.

I think it's only because of that kinda creepy smile on his face and her youngish face, but it does look slightly wrong.

Sstoopidtallkid
2010-01-15, 08:27 PM
I think it's only because of that kinda creepy smile on his face and her youngish face, but it does look slightly wrong.Well, he's playing Jaws in that shot. You know, the James Bond villain? But the girl he's with was dubbed 'too short to be believable as a romantic interest' by producers until he said his real-life wife was the same size. I just can't find any pictures of her with him.

Xenogears
2010-01-15, 09:58 PM
Well, he's playing Jaws in that shot. You know, the James Bond villain? But the girl he's with was dubbed 'too short to be believable as a romantic interest' by producers until he said his real-life wife was the same size. I just can't find any pictures of her with him.

To be perfectly honest that looks more like a father and his daughter than a couple. Honestly.

Kris Strife
2010-01-15, 10:30 PM
who? i just saw a picture with a totally hot halfling girl labeled lidda...

Dark Sun is a setting where, among other things, halflings are cannibles.
OmNomNom is the onomontepiea for eating something/someone.

taltamir
2010-01-15, 11:09 PM
Dark Sun is a setting where, among other things, halflings are cannibles.
OmNomNom is the onomontepiea for eating something/someone.

and I said om nom nom because she looks deliciously sexy... and I wasn't referring to the "cannibalism" interpretation of "eating"

pretty creepy about them being cannibals in dark sun... why did they do that?

Sstoopidtallkid
2010-01-15, 11:14 PM
and I said om nom nom because she looks deliciously sexy... and I wasn't referring to the "cannibalism" interpretation of "eating"

pretty creepy about them being cannibals in dark sun... why did they do that?Because Dark Sun is dark. Every race is on the border of extinction, magic has nearly destroyed the wold, Psionics are the only casting system remaining(trust me, it was scary before 3.5 came out), so the world is not traditional fantasy. The standard races have taken on new roles. Halflings are the most mutable of the PHB races, so they got to be the wild savages.

Quite frankly, I prefer the Eberron fluff of Halflings. Much more awesome.

Coidzor
2010-01-16, 01:40 AM
Also the fact that you can quite easily lift the 30 pound halfling is a little disconcerting.

Or opens up new and interesting possibilities!

Bhu
2010-01-16, 05:03 AM
Disturbingly there is mythological precedent for half undead, half dragons, etc...

taltamir
2010-01-16, 11:01 AM
Disturbingly there is mythological precedent for half undead, half dragons, etc...

do tell? I am more then a bit curious


Or opens up new and interesting possibilities!

can't most guys lift their woman? the traditional wedding thing is to carry her over the door and all that. might not be as easy, but still pretty common.

Starbuck_II
2010-01-16, 11:05 AM
To be perfectly honest that looks more like a father and his daughter than a couple. Honestly.

Frued says if you think that first you might have issues. Than again he say a sometimes "Cigar is just a cigar".

taltamir
2010-01-16, 11:11 AM
Frued says if you think that first you might have issues.
Heh, sometimes frued is even right ... :P


Than again he say a sometimes "Cigar is just a cigar".

and sometimes a cigar is a penis that you want to use on some bimbo (in the oval office?). :P

Grumman
2010-01-16, 11:21 AM
I always thought the half-human or half-dragon thing was a bit much (since apparently humans mate with anything they can, and dragons just resize to fit).
Agreed. Some writers seem to have decided that dragons have no self respect (half-dragon bear? WTF?). For anything worse than a humanoid/dragon-with-humanoid-alternate-form hybrid, I'd just rule it discanon.


I don't care how small she is, Lidda IS hot!
http://www.enworld.org/Pozas/Pictures/Iconics/lidda.jpg
That she is. :smallbiggrin:

Longcat
2010-01-16, 12:12 PM
can't most guys lift their woman? the traditional wedding thing is to carry her over the door and all that. might not be as easy, but still pretty common.

Depends on the couple. I the average guy who doesn't work can't lift an average 50-60kg woman.

On a side note, if you could do a mythological creature of your choice, what would it be?

For me, it'll be a tough call between a silver dragon, a vampire or a solar. Unless they'd be willing for a foursome, in which case there's no dilemma at all.

taltamir
2010-01-16, 12:16 PM
Depends on the couple. I the average guy who doesn't work can't lift an average 50-60kg woman.

On a side note, if you could do a mythological creature of your choice, what would it be?

For me, it'll be a tough call between a silver dragon, a vampire or a solar. Unless they'd be willing for a foursome, in which case there's no dilemma at all.

foursome indeed... I mean, it will take several pages to write down the full list of mythological creatures I'd wanna do :)

As I always say, choosing is for monogamists.

Blas_de_Lezo
2010-01-16, 12:19 PM
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2483/3560915284_4b7e51c767_o.jpg

You know you would.



Don't judge me.


Of course she's sexy... because she doesn't look like a damn female dwarf!! :smallannoyed:

She has a totally human face, with a girly-girl expresion. Just drawing a hot chick with an axe and naming it "dwarf", doesn't mean a thing... :smallsigh:

Here's a true fem dwarf:

http://krasnoludy.e-gate.pl/image/kubasa/dwarf-female.jpg

Yet another. Now a noble-aristocratic female dwarf, suposed to be beauty:

http://mythicmktg.fileburst.com/war/us/home/images/newsletter/global/2006/CA_oct_2006_newsl25.jpg


And this is taking into account that none of the two fem dwarf have a slightly noticiable beard... :smallamused:

Longcat
2010-01-16, 12:22 PM
foursome indeed... I mean, it will take several pages to write down the full list of mythological creatures I'd wanna do :)


Just stick with MM1 for the time being ;)

I mean, you gotta prioritize, right? :smallwink::smalltongue:



As I always say, choosing is for monogamists.

Monogamy is hard enough in RL... add in MM1-5, and it becomes impossible:smallbiggrin:

Starbuck_II
2010-01-16, 12:26 PM
Why do the "dwarf"'er pictures have bigger chests?

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-16, 12:27 PM
Depends on the couple. I the average guy who doesn't work can't lift an average 50-60kg woman.

On a side note, if you could do a mythological creature of your choice, what would it be?

If I could pick only one? A werewolf. Insert peanut butter joke here

Now if if more than one, Anything but the undead or elves.

Touchy
2010-01-16, 12:44 PM
Why do the "dwarf"'er pictures have bigger chests?

Because we are posting beautiful by dwarf standards, they still like it big you know. :smallamused:

Also: Changeling, in their true form.

taltamir
2010-01-16, 12:50 PM
Of course she's sexy... because she doesn't look like a damn female dwarf!! :smallannoyed:

she isn't a female dwarf, she is a female Mul (half human, half dwarf). And her features and proportions are somewhat dwarfish, she looks like she is very short and somewhat stockier then a human woman.

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-16, 12:51 PM
Nothing stocky about her. Short yes but not stocky. Cute though. I'd throw down a few plat for a roll, just saying.

Eldariel
2010-01-16, 12:53 PM
Now if if more than one, Anything but the undead or elves.

You should go see a doctor. You're leaking stupid all over the internet.

taltamir
2010-01-16, 12:59 PM
Nothing stocky about her. Short yes but not stocky. Cute though. I'd throw down a few plat for a roll, just saying.

I compliment her looks, I'd say I want to do her... but I wouldn't go around suggesting that she is a whore. (even a very expensive one)... what kind of compliment is that supposed to be?

PS.A platinum coin is 100 gold right? a single gold coin is about 60 to 80 USD... so thats 6000-8000$ per platinum coin...

Touchy
2010-01-16, 01:00 PM
You should go see a doctor. You're leaking stupid all over the internet.

Who'd want an elf, they would be talking about how much elf men were better than you, and generally putting you down for being a human. :smallannoyed:

taltamir
2010-01-16, 01:03 PM
Not wanting elves is understandable... A lot of people think "mialee the deformed anthro cricket" when they think elf; because of WOTC choice in "art" for elves... and who would want that? *barf*

Eldariel
2010-01-16, 01:05 PM
Who'd want an elf, they would be talking about how much elf men were better than you, and generally putting you down for being a human. :smallannoyed:

They've had hundreds of years to hone their craft, while still being youthful. And magic spices things up nicely. And it's not so much the elves telling you they're better as humans having some silly inferiority complex.


Not wanting elves is understandable... A lot of people think "mialee the deformed anthro cricket" when they think elf; because of WOTC choice in "art" for elves... and who would want that? *barf*

I thought we established "Mialee is a purple mutant frog" long ago?

taltamir
2010-01-16, 01:06 PM
They've had hundreds of years to hone their craft, while still being youthful. And magic spices things up nicely. And it's not so much the elves telling you they're better as humans having some silly inferiority complex.

pfft... they have had hundreds of years and still can't match a human 1/5th their age in skill.
elves are vastly inferior.

Eldariel
2010-01-16, 01:13 PM
pfft... they have had hundreds of years and still can't match a human 1/5th their age in skill.
elves are vastly inferior.

And yet it's the humans talking about how the elves are so superior. Funny how that works.

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-16, 01:16 PM
You should go see a doctor. You're leaking stupid all over the internet.

Pssst. Your Douche bag is showing. Might wanna cover that up.

As for why I wouldn't touch an elf, I do not like scrawny old women thank you very much. Especially when they need five times as long to do anything.



http://www.cliffordbbowyer.com/Race_Example-PH2.gif


Yeaaaah no. Everything else is fine by me, but the elf I could use like a xylophone so no thanks.

Touchy
2010-01-16, 01:16 PM
They've had hundreds of years to hone their craft, while still being youthful. And magic spices things up nicely. And it's not so much the elves telling you they're better as humans having some silly inferiority complex.



I thought we established "Mialee is a purple mutant frog" long ago?
Inferiority complex? I don't remember having that, I'm sure its more of "elves think their better" than "Humans think their worse than elves". :smallmad:

taltamir
2010-01-16, 01:19 PM
read this about elven inferiority:

http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=7704407#post7704407

Eldariel
2010-01-16, 01:27 PM
Pssst. Your Douche bag is showing. Might wanna cover that up.

You mean this (http://hotdogandfriends.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/douchebag.jpg)? I don't really see why that'd be a problem :smallbiggrin:


As for why I wouldn't touch an elf, I do not like scrawny old women thank you very much. Especially when they need five times as long to do anything.


http://www.cliffordbbowyer.com/Race_Example-PH2.gif


Yeaaaah no. Everything else is fine by me, but the elf I could use like a xylophone so no thanks.

I thought we already concluded that Mialee is a mutant frog, not an Elf.


Inferiority complex? I don't remember having that, I'm sure its more of "elves think their better" than "Humans think their worse than elves". :smallmad:

Sure, you think they think that. It's really all in your mind.


read this about elven inferiority:

http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=7704407#post7704407

Maybe the high-level Elven Wizards just don't care enough to make themselves known, preferring to expand the boundaries of magic and their own knowledge instead of dealing with hordes of fangirls.

On a metagame level, we'll have to remember that the only reason the limitations are in the place in the first place is to avoid having Elves break the game entirely. So Elves are just toning down their performance to let the lesser races shine think they're doing something.

Coidzor
2010-01-16, 01:38 PM
Ah, putting the romance back in necromancer. Just remember kids, necrophilia means never having to say you're sorry! Or anything else, for that matter.

JaronK

This reminds me. My roomie was in an icebreaking activity at some camp over the summer, and they were going around and saying what member of the undead they would be if they were undead. And the blonde next to him gets confused and says "Necrophiliac," so he just says "fresh corpse." The snickering and some one else whispering into her ear caused her to develop freckles.

Touchy
2010-01-16, 01:40 PM
Sure, you think they think that. It's really all in your mind.


Of course it's in my mind, those are my perceptions of the fantasy(or not real) elves, I've always thought them as such, and I am allowed to do so with my interpretations of fantasy creatures, you wonder why people argue if dog people or dragon-loving kobolds is the better interpretation. This is how they were always presented to me and thats how I will do so. Maybe if you were DMing for me, I would understand how elves are better than me in every way, but no, in my fantasy universes, elves are pricks.

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-16, 01:41 PM
This reminds me. My roomie was in an icebreaking activity at some camp over the summer, and they were going around and saying what member of the undead they would be if they were undead. And the blonde next to him gets confused and says "Necrophiliac," so he just says "fresh corpse." The snickering and some one else whispering into her ear caused her to develop freckles.

Adorable ^_^

Also, i did not know one could develop freckles. neat.

Coidzor
2010-01-16, 01:43 PM
PS.A platinum coin is 100 gold right? a single gold coin is about 60 to 80 USD... so thats 6000-8000$ per platinum coin...

1 plat = 10 gold.
1 gold = 10 silver
1 silver = 10 cp
1 cp = Federal Prison For Life.

1 electrum = ???

absolmorph
2010-01-16, 01:43 PM
Depends on the couple. I the average guy who doesn't work can't lift an average 50-60kg woman.

On a side note, if you could do a mythological creature of your choice, what would it be?

For me, it'll be a tough call between a silver dragon, a vampire or a solar. Unless they'd be willing for a foursome, in which case there's no dilemma at all.
Probably a solar.
Really, I just want something that could easily kill me if I pissed it off, but is still pretty attractive. Which is rather stupid; I enjoy being irritating.
There's also a character from Warcraft lore I'd go for (Alexstrasza). Seriously. I'd make half-dragons with her.

taltamir
2010-01-16, 01:49 PM
Probably a solar.
Really, I just want something that could easily kill me if I pissed it off, but is still pretty attractive. Which is rather stupid; I enjoy being irritating.
There's also a character from Warcraft lore I'd go for (Alexstrasza). Seriously. I'd make half-dragons with her.

in a fantasy setting, my goal in life would be to impregnate as many "higher" beings as possible... solars, demons, dragons, etc...
:)

Coidzor
2010-01-16, 01:51 PM
Solars: Those are the ones which are big enough to fit a fully grown human man inside of them, right? 30 feet tall and all that jazz?

Or was it halflings and gnomes that were famous for having died in that manner?


Adorable ^_^

Also, i did not know one could develop freckles. neat.

Well, there might be a bit of hyperbole there. But she was blushing something fierce, haha.

Eldariel
2010-01-16, 01:52 PM
Of course it's in my mind, those are my perceptions of the fantasy(or not real) elves, I've always thought them as such, and I am allowed to do so with my interpretations of fantasy creatures, you wonder why people argue if dog people or dragon-loving kobolds is the better interpretation. This is how they were always presented to me and thats how I will do so. Maybe if you were DMing for me, I would understand how elves are better than me in every way, but no, in my fantasy universes, elves are pricks.

Aye, prejudice is your god-given right. Also, if I wasn't clear enough, I'm not being wholly serious. I am, however, quite amused.

Coidzor
2010-01-16, 01:54 PM
Aye, prejudice is your god-given right. Also, if I wasn't clear enough, I'm not being wholly serious. I am, however, quite amused.

Indeed. And this amusing little diversion is why I can't think of Varsuvius as anything other than hermaphroditic. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNrLMob39qI)

absolmorph
2010-01-16, 01:58 PM
Indeed. And this amusing little diversion is why I can't think of Varsuvius as anything other than hermaphroditic. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNrLMob39qI)
Oh, wow.
That's hilarious!

Touchy
2010-01-16, 03:25 PM
Aye, prejudice is your god-given right. Also, if I wasn't clear enough, I'm not being wholly serious. I am, however, quite amused.

Well I was trolled, time to move on with my life.

Thurbane
2010-01-16, 05:40 PM
Not wanting elves is understandable... A lot of people think "mialee the deformed anthro cricket" when they think elf; because of WOTC choice in "art" for elves... and who would want that? *barf*
Agreed 100%...
http://i47.tinypic.com/bjan3q.jpg

...and who says 1/2 Orcs can't be hot?

http://i45.tinypic.com/fefp14.jpg

Asbestos
2010-01-16, 06:48 PM
can't most guys lift their woman? the traditional wedding thing is to carry her over the door and all that. might not be as easy, but still pretty common.
Big difference between being able to lift and being able to easily curl with one arm. Seriously, halflings are 30 pounds? I'm glad they got a size upgrade in 4e.

taltamir
2010-01-16, 06:48 PM
http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/mailee_color.jpg

*Barf*
Sorry, but I must decline.


Big difference between being able to lift and being able to easily curl with one arm. Seriously, halflings are 30 pounds? I'm glad they got a size upgrade in 4e.

thats just inconsistent writing by WOTC...
petals are 1.5 feet tall and weigh 3 pounds. While coures are 2 feet tall and weigh 30 pounds...

I think they just have little to no idea what a small person should weigh.

Shademan
2010-01-16, 07:27 PM
Big difference between being able to lift and being able to easily curl with one arm. Seriously, halflings are 30 pounds? I'm glad they got a size upgrade in 4e.

I too would like to see the 3.5 halfling being SLLIIIGHTLY bigger, but not so much that human could get a hard-on without feeling like a pedobear. Makes for great issues and stuff if two PC's fall in love and one is a halfling...

Thurbane
2010-01-16, 07:35 PM
I once played in a game where one of the party was a shifter, and would try to make it with anything in a dress. He came back to the inn with a tiny pair of panties (i.e. halfling size) on his head. We asked him to never explain.

Odd game, that one.

Longcat
2010-01-17, 04:47 AM
I too would like to see the 3.5 halfling being SLLIIIGHTLY bigger, but not so much that human could get a hard-on without feeling like a pedobear. Makes for great issues and stuff if two PC's fall in love and one is a halfling...

Read the part in BoEF about the LG Human Paladin and the CG Halfling Bard making out. But then, both were girls, so ymmv.

Bhu
2010-01-17, 05:38 AM
do tell? I am more then a bit curious


In several vampire myths around the world (particularly the gypsies) the first thing many vampires do is kill their family members, and repeatedly boink their wife until she dies of exhaustion or gets pregnant. So there's the half vampire.

For a more out there version you have Zmag Oghjeni VUk from Russian myth. He was a fire breathing werewolf whose father was a dragon. So there's the Half-Dragon Lycanthrope.

There are more examples but I'd have to peek through my encyclopedias for them.

Vizzerdrix
2010-01-17, 07:33 AM
For a more out there version you have Zmag Oghjeni VUk from Russian myth. He was a fire breathing werewolf whose father was a dragon. So there's the Half-Dragon Lycanthrope.

There are more examples but I'd have to peek through my encyclopedias for them.

I... I must play this now :eek:

But how best to do so, and from a low level. Were riding dog instead of wolf, And maybe a twist on the breath weapon, Maybe some way to make it two elements, But the premise will stay the same.

Eldariel
2010-01-17, 03:11 PM
http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/mailee_color.jpg

Hey. Stop confusing Mutant Frogs with Elves. Honestly, that's offensive to both, Elves and Mutant Frogs. And everyone in-between. Honestly, considering Mialee anything but "herself" is an offense punishable by death.

Sstoopidtallkid
2010-01-18, 12:32 AM
Were Mul's statted out anywhere for 3.5?

absolmorph
2010-01-18, 12:36 AM
I too would like to see the 3.5 halfling being SLLIIIGHTLY bigger, but not so much that human could get a hard-on without feeling like a pedobear. Makes for great issues and stuff if two PC's fall in love and one is a halfling...
You've obviously never considered how midgets get laid.

SilverSheriff
2010-01-18, 03:08 AM
1 cp = Federal Prison For Life.

I see what you did there.

Touchy
2010-01-18, 03:12 AM
I see what you did there.

It's not a subtle joke.

With all these races, I wonder how "hybrid" you can get. How many half-templates are actually possible to (somehow) handwave off short of "a wizard did it".

Eldariel
2010-01-18, 03:50 AM
It's not a subtle joke.

With all these races, I wonder how "hybrid" you can get. How many half-templates are actually possible to (somehow) handwave off short of "a wizard did it".

Any. Try it; it never fails.

Coidzor
2010-01-18, 05:26 AM
I remember that at least some of them don't always necessarily mean that one of the direct antecedents/parents was a full one of them... Now whether I remember this correctly, hmm...

Or how many such templates, yeah....

Blackfang108
2010-01-18, 09:54 AM
Were Mul's statted out anywhere for 3.5?

www.athas.org (http://www.athas.org)

Officially unofficial 3.5 update of Dark Sun

Zaydos
2010-01-18, 11:42 AM
Muls were also statted out in a dragon magazine (forget the number) are sterile, male, bald, and kill their mother being born and exist simply as very expensive gladiator-slaves because they're better warriors than everyone else.

Note: in addition to half-dragons and half-undead myths bring us half-bulls, and Loki turning into a mare and giving birth to an eight-legged horse. They get... don't think too hard on them or you need brain bleach.

As for a MMI creature to sleep with... possibly nymph, or gold/silver/bronze dragon (what 30+ Charisma is hot and they can change shape; they also happen to be my 3 favorite core dragons).

taltamir
2010-01-18, 01:23 PM
Originally Posted by Touchy
It's not a subtle joke.

With all these races, I wonder how "hybrid" you can get. How many half-templates are actually possible to (somehow) handwave off short of "a wizard did it".

A wizard did it... with his p----!
That wizard must be quite a playboy... ;p

Actually being a wizard is great if your goal is interspecies sex. you can cast just the right immunity spell, enlarge/reduce yourself and your partner(s), get some damage reduction from stoneskin if necessary... etc.

faceroll
2010-02-05, 03:19 PM
in a fantasy setting, my goal in life would be to impregnate as many "higher" beings as possible... solars, demons, dragons, etc...
:)

I hate to tell you this, but in the Abyss, demons impregnate YOU.

AllisterH
2010-02-06, 08:52 PM
I kind of *LIKE* that Mialee wasn't traditionally attractive.

To many elf drawings more like an excuse for humans to get their jollies than anthing else.

taltamir
2010-02-07, 08:02 PM
I hate to tell you this, but in the Abyss, demons impregnate YOU.

you know I am a male right? it would be obvious from the "impregnate them" part... so are you suggesting mpreg?