Wish and Result

[Lysander]

Let's go through some hypothetical Wishes. One person makes a wish or two, the next person says what they as DM would grant for it. Let's assume that the player isn't trying to break the game, the DM isn't out to screw the player and doesn't want to twist or misconstrue the wish, but the Wish is non-standard and maybe a little hard to adjudicate. What's a fair DM's response?

"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"

"I wish I could speak every language"

"I wish that the [lich's well guarded phylactery on another plane] would teleport to the ground in front of us'

[MickJay]

1. Works, but only a limited number of times (perhaps even once - but indeed at will and at the time desired by the person making the wish). You're asking for a specific form of Polymorph Self, permanently in effect and at will. Even limited to a single and not powerful creature, it would be too much to be granted as requested.

2. Same as above. Or perhaps only for a limited time (6 months or a year?). Or perhaps you now indeed know the basics of all of the languages, enough to communicate, but you still can't read or write in most of them, and you can't engage in a difficult conversations. I'd rule that fluidity and reading/writing would need to be achieved by mundane means. You're asking for permanent free Speak Language (each and every one) here. That's a lot. :smallbiggrin:

3. Teleporting objects like that is beyond the power of Wish, nothing happens. In the worst case, protective spells inform the lich that someone was trying to get their phylactery.

Even if the Wish was powerful enough to teleport objects in this way, a phylactery would still be secured by multiple spells, some of them specifically designed to prevent teleportation, others to inform the lich of the attempt.

[Malificus]

"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"

You have a new at will ability. You turn into an eagle and return to your human form in a standard (though redundant) action. It's very useful for getting out of polymorph, not so much for flying.

[MickJay]

To be fair, that is screwing the player over a bit. It is what he asked for, but that was hardly the intent of the wish. :smalltongue:

[drengnikrafe]

"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"

Gain a level in druid, and tell them to keep taking it. Your wish will come in time, sort of. Either that or partial fulfillment with a SLA for turning into an eagle for a period of up to one hour per day. You may turn back into a human at will, but have to wait until the next day for it to recharge, even if you only use it for 3 minutes.


"I wish I could speak every language"
Permenancied Tounges. It's replicating a 4th (IIRC) level spell, and then a 6th level one. That doesn't seem to unreasonable to me, especially considering the cost of wish.


"I wish that the [lich's well guarded phylactery on another plane] would teleport to the ground in front of us'

Bad player. Don't go breaking the DM's entire plot based on a single wish. It's meant to be an adventure, you're not meant to get a win button. Wish refunded.


That being said, I'll try one out.
"I wish that flames of all sorts would no longer influence me."

[RandomLunatic]

1: I would say a one-shot wildhsape ability would be fair.

2: Tonuges is cast on the wisher. If you want to be generous, have it be permanent.

3: Wish already has the power transport creatures across the multiverse, so I would probably just extend it to objects. It would still get a Will save and SR. And smart liches would most likely Dimensional Anchor their phylactery to guard against this anyway.

[Foryn Gilnith]

1) You gain the ability to polymorph into an eagle, and polymorph back into a human. You are also given the (shapechanger) subtype. This is not permanent, and will wear off at a dramatically appropriate time.
2) You are affected by Persistent Tongues, which will wear off (as normal) in 24 hours.
3) A small, phylactery-sized rift to the Astral Plane appears in the ground in front of you. It does not lead anywhere in particular.

[lsfreak]

1. Granted to the letter and intent. At-will Polymorph, into a moderately useful creature, but still less useful than just Overland Flight. Since Natural Spell is unavailable and you lose all magic items while Polymorphed (except maybe a ring or the like), I see no problem whatsoever.

2. Granted. Compare to permenancied comprehend languagestongues, and the differences in experience cost.

3. Not enough information, as it depends on the guards that the phylactery has. More than likely, a gate opens up and the phylactery drops through, but all the guards are allowed to freely walk and kick the crap out of you as well.

EDIT: Okay, most of the people here {Scrubbed} seem to forget your player just blew 5000xp. When someone wishes for something, you don't give them something that's replicated by a 5th-level spell slot! (Unless they specifically ask for that to be cast).

[MickJay]

That being said, I'll try one out.
"I wish that flames of all sorts would no longer influence me."

You'd probably freeze to death within seconds. You can no longer be heated by campfire, even sun does not warm you. In the worst case, your own metabolism shuts down. It's the "all sorts" and "influence" combined that screw you over here (even without particular malevolence of the DM).

Replace "influence" with "harm", and you'll get some form of fire resistance (low value and permanent, moderate and lasting for a few days, or indeed an invulnerability to fire, but only for a short time).

edit: invulnerability could potentially be a gamebreaker if it was sufficient to eliminate/avoid a key plot element. In that case, one of the other 2 effects would apply.

[drengnikrafe]

EDIT: Okay, most of the people here {Scrubbed} seem to forget your player just blew 5000xp. When someone wishes for something, you don't give them something that's replicated by a 5th-level spell slot! (Unless they specifically ask for that to be cast).

Your observation is so depressing and true. People have played around in one too many "Screw over my wish" threads. I think wishes are meant to be fulfilled unless they're really obnoxious, and the only really obnoxious one is the third one, for trying to break the campaign.

[Foryn Gilnith]

Okay, most of the people here {Scrubbed} seem to forget your player just blew 5000xp.

That's their fault for being stupid enough to cast Wish. I have never seen it used in real play. Given that it can't even replicate True Resurrection, I don't see why any player would expect to get value worth the 5000 XP. Nor do I see why any wizard worth his 19 intelligence would try it. The stated ROI sucks; I don't see why DM-adjudicated ROI would be much better.

@dregnikrafe: You are affected by Extended Energy Immunity (fire). You have Fire Immunity for the next 48 hours.

@MickJay: The sun is not a flame under any physics system, real or fantastical, that I've heard of.

[Twilight Jack]

EDIT: Okay, most of the people here {Scrubbed} seem to forget your player just blew 5000xp. When someone wishes for something, you don't give them something that's replicated by a 5th-level spell slot! (Unless they specifically ask for that to be cast).

While I agree that many DMs have an unreasonable desire to screw any player who tries to wish for something, I do think it's worth noting that most wishes are not brought about by the player dropping a 9th level spell and 5,000xp. They're achieved in other, less taxing ways. My take on it is that wish is most effective when you've the power to cast it yourself. When a 17th level Wizard drops 5,000xp, I tend to look kindly upon him. When a 9th level Wizard pulls some kind of shenanigans with an Efreet, not so much.

[Lysander]

That being said, I'll try one out.
"I wish that flames of all sorts would no longer influence me."

A ring of fire resistance 15 appears on the player's finger. A major ring that grants resistance 20 is just a little bit beyond Wish's price range so a version between the minor and major rings seem like a fair compromise.

[MickJay]

@ Foryn Glinith: IRL, it isn't. However, most fantasy systems do not cover physics to such a degree, and some do indeed make an association between the sun and fire (you'll have to take my word for that, I can't give you a specific example at the moment).

Even if the sunlight worked as usual, there would be a problem with metabolism.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

That's their fault for being stupid enough to cast Wish. I have never seen it used in real play. Given that it can't even replicate True Resurrection, I don't see why any player would expect to get value worth the 5000 XP. Nor do I see why any wizard worth his 19 intelligence would try it. The stated ROI sucks; I don't see why DM-adjudicated ROI would be much better.

Get something worth 5000XP? Probably not. Expect that spending 5000XP means they aren't going to be arbitrarily screwed by the DM? Definitely. Unless a wish is being granted by a creature or item that explicitly doesn't like the wisher or just screws up wishes in general, I do what lsfreak does and try to figure out the nearest spell/ability equivalent and whether wish would be able to do that within its normal limits. If so, and if it doesn't break the plot like question #3, they get what they wished for in name and in spirit. The fact that it's not usually worth it to use a wish unless you're getting it for free doesn't mean you should punish someone just for using it.


@MickJay: The sun is not a flame under any physics system, real or fantastical, that I've heard of.

If you're working with the classical Greek elemental system base D&D uses, then I'd say the sun is fire by dint of it not being air, water, or earth.

[Grumman]

"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"
They get the Divine Minion of Isis template for free. Considering that with LA buyoff it's only worth 3,000 xp, this seems perfectly fair to me.

[Claudius Maximus]

Assuming this isn't the result of some kind of infinite/free wishes shenanigans (which I will never let into my games, ever), I'd deal with these as follows:


"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"

Granted. There's a low level spell that does this anyway, IIRC. Now you can use that at-will.


"I wish I could speak every language"

Permanent Tongues.


"I wish that the [lich's well guarded phylactery on another plane] would teleport to the ground in front of us'

There's a will save involved, and SR applies. Dimensional Anchor/Lock (which is likely, if it's really "well-guarded") defeats it. Otherwise, it would work.


"I wish that flames of all sorts would no longer influence me."

This is too much for a Wish, as it is better than a 9th level spell (Mantle of the Fiery Spirit). You would get some kind of partial fulfillment, perhaps some kind of permanent fire resistance or a magic item like Lysander suggested.

[MickJay]

If you're working with the classical Greek elemental system base D&D uses, then I'd say the sun is fire by dint of it not being air, water, or earth.

While you are supporting my argument, I feel obliged to mention the clause that "unless otherwise specified, D&D world works exactly as our own". Which is, frankly speaking, bull, because if it did, there would be spells and effects using radiation or quantum effects. Unless the spells already do work like that, but why would there be no mention of the theory behind it? :smalltongue:

[jiriku]

"I wish for the power to turn into an eagle and return to my human form at will"

You gain a modified version of alter self as an at-will spell-like ability, but can only assume the form of an eagle. If you paid xp for it, I'd tend to make the ability permanent. If you found a way to get the wish for free, the ability works only once.


"I wish I could speak every language"

You gain tongues as a permanent supernatural ability, but it does not allow you to read other languages (you forgot to wish for that!).


"I wish that the [lich's well guarded phylactery on another plane] would teleport to the ground in front of us'

The phylactery appears. So does the lich.



That being said, I'll try one out.
"I wish that flames of all sorts would no longer influence me."


You gain the fire subtype permanently. In addition, you are no longer troubled by memories of your ex-girlfriends. However, no matter how desirable the woman who might pursue you, you will never again fall in love.

(Hey, you did say flames of all sorts!)

[Justin B.]

I second the thought that most of you are being harsh, Wish doesn't need to be wrapped and rules and limits, that's the fun of it. The first two options stated by the OP are fun and clever, and well within the dramatic and literary context of a "wish". The third is a jerk move by the player, but there are several ways for the DM to get out of it without going "The rules don't allow for that," which is probably the most immersion-breaking thing a DM can say.

My wishes:

"I wish I was the wealthiest person alive."

"I wish I could teleport at will."

"I wish X ability was usable at will"

"I wish I had more spell slots."

"I wish I had feat."

[drengnikrafe]

You gain the fire subtype permanently. In addition, you are no longer troubled by memories of your ex-girlfriends. However, no matter how desirable the woman who might pursue you, you will never again fall in love.

(Hey, you did say flames of all sorts!)

You win a cookie?

[vanyell]

I second the thought that most of you are being harsh, Wish doesn't need to be wrapped and rules and limits, that's the fun of it. The first two options stated by the OP are fun and clever, and well within the dramatic and literary context of a "wish". The third is a jerk move by the player, but there are several ways for the DM to get out of it without going "The rules don't allow for that," which is probably the most immersion-breaking thing a DM can say.

My wishes:

"I wish I was the wealthiest person alive."

"I wish I could teleport at will."

"I wish X ability was usable at will"

"I wish I had more spell slots."

"I wish I had feat."

1) put in stasis or something until the doomsday situation you were supposed to resolve happens (you're the wealthiest person alive because you're the only person alive)

2) you loose all caster levels, and gain the same number of levels in warlock, and gain the invocation "flee the scene"

3) as above, but making the ability into an invocation, if it's not totally broken

4) see above. you now have infinite spell slots for a very small number of spells

5) magic item that takes 2-3 different item slots that gives you the feat (ie. it's a body suit that takes up belt vest and bracers slot)


Edit: and I forgot my wish:
I wish I knew the location of Insert plot related item here. (I tend to make my DM's life easy if I can)

[jiriku]

Amusing!



My wishes:

"I wish I was the wealthiest person alive."

There are so many ways this could be granted.

You gain luxury goods valued at 25,000 gp, which is the best the wish can do.
Everyone in the multi-verse who is wealthier than you becomes aware that you just misused a wish spell in a way that would have killed them, had it been powerful enough to do so. Have a nice day.
You become aware of the location of an immense dragon hoard, guarded by a great wyrm dragon. Go get him, tiger.
The wealthiest man currently alive abruptly names you his heir, then dies of a sudden heart attack. You inherit his wealth, but his jilted heirs now (correctly) suspect you of foul play.



"I wish I could teleport at will."

You acquire at-will boots of teleportation at the standard xp cost for using wish to acquire a custom magical item.


"I wish X ability was usable at will"

Varies strongly depending on what "ability x" is.


"I wish I had more spell slots."

This one could also be granted in multiple ways.

You gain a ring of wizardry or a headband of intellect at the standard xp cost for using wish to create a magic item.
If your Intelligence is an odd number, you gain a +1 inherent bonus to Intelligence, which grants you an extra spell slot.
Bad wizard! All of your currently prepared spells are immediately expended. Now you have plenty of spell slots.




"I wish I had feat."

You gain a magical item granting the feat at the standard xp cost for using wish to acquire a custom magic item.

[Sleepingbear]

You gain the fire subtype permanently. In addition, you are no longer troubled by memories of your ex-girlfriends. However, no matter how desirable the woman who might pursue you, you will never again fall in love.

(Hey, you did say flames of all sorts!)

Imagine being able to say anything you wanted on the internet...

[vanyell]

not true... you'd avoid the flames, but the trolls would still be a problem... and you need fire to make sure the trolls stay dead. you'd be screwed.

[Grumman]

"I wish I could teleport at will."
You get either Dimensional Jaunt or Martial Study (Shadow Jaunt, Stride or Blink) as a bonus feat.

[Blackfang108]

2. Same as above. Or perhaps only for a limited time (6 months or a year?). Or perhaps you now indeed know the basics of all of the languages, enough to communicate, but you still can't read or write in most of them, and you can't engage in a difficult conversations. I'd rule that fluidity and reading/writing would need to be achieved by mundane means. You're asking for permanent free Speak Language (each and every one) here. That's a lot. :smallbiggrin:


No.

It's a permanent Tongues. That's not that rediculous.

[Lysander]

"I wish I was the wealthiest person alive."

"I wish I could teleport at will."

"I wish X ability was usable at will"

"I wish I had more spell slots."

"I wish I had feat."

1. Hmm. This is obviously a bad idea. Fortunately wish isn't powerful enough to kill everyone else in the multiverse. I'd probably make the item summon up 25,000 gp in a chest along with a book on investing.

2. You get a Cape of the Mounteback. Maybe a better version with 2 dimension door hops a day instead of just one.

3. Depends on the ability. I'd probably give them anything a cheap item would grant built in, anything an expensive item would grant as an item.

4. They get a ring of wizardry 1.

5. They get the feat, if they qualify for it. Otherwise they get an item that approximates what they're asking for.

[Jayabalard]

EDIT: Okay, most of the people here{Scrubbed} seem to forget your player just blew 5000xp. When someone wishes for something, you don't give them something that's replicated by a 5th-level spell slot! (Unless they specifically ask for that to be cast).It really depends on whether you're casting the wish spell, or coercing some being into granting a wish.

In the latter case, I personally think that you should generally expect the coerced being to try and pervert the wish in as nasty a way as they can.

[Lysander]

It really depends on whether you're casting the wish spell, or coercing some being into granting a wish.

In the latter case, I personally think that you should generally expect the coerced being to try and pervert the wish in as nasty a way as they can.

I agree. You should expect "helpful" wishes if you either A) Cast the wish yourself or B) Are gifted the wish as a plot reward. Malicious wishes are a given when you're forcing some powerful creature to bow to your whims.

[Jayabalard]

I agree. You should expect "helpful" wishes if you either A) Cast the wish yourself or B) Are gifted the wish as a plot reward. Malicious wishes are a given when you're forcing some powerful creature to bow to your whims.To add: it's not clear how magic items that grant wishes work; or for that matter, it's not explicitly declared how the wish spell itself works; the actual mechanics might vary from campaign to campaign, and that should probably have an effect on how wishes are adjudicated.

For example, if the wish spell (or ring of 3 wishes, etc) works by binding some powerful being in a particular campaign, then you should probably not be surprised if wishes, even ones from items or spells, are adjudicated is a fairly malicious way.

As long as you're clear up front that this is how the spells work, then players shouldn't be caught by surprise by wishes gone wrong.

[Blackfang108]

I agree. You should expect "helpful" wishes if you either A) Cast the wish yourself or B) Are gifted the wish as a plot reward. Malicious wishes are a given when you're forcing some powerful creature to bow to your whims.

What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?

[Kylarra]

It really depends on whether you're casting the wish spell, or coercing some being into granting a wish.

In the latter case, I personally think that you should generally expect the coerced being to try and pervert the wish in as nasty a way as they can.This is my usual rule of thumb when adjucating wish.


What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?Then it'd depend on your relations with that shopkeeper. Assuming neutral, then I'd opt more towards partial fulfillment vs outright perversion if you try to exceed "safe" wish limits.

[Grumman]

What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?
Then the spellcaster gets a "helpful" wish. Whether he wished for what you asked him to wish for is up to him.

[Optimystik]

What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?

Then you get the benefits, and he gets screwed as he is the caster. Everyone wins!

[taltamir]

"I wish I could speak every language"

Permanancied tongues costs a fraction of the XP of the wish spell. the wish should provide something better then just a permanent tongue spell (And shame on those who gave the player anything less than perma tongues)

maybe permanant tongues with a CL of an epic caster, meaning only epic enemies can dispel it... or just give the player the polyglot feat (speaks all languages).

[Lysander]

What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?

"Dude, look that's going to be extra. You'd need like...two wishes and some additional support spellcasting to pull off that. If you want I can calculate how much but let's be frank. It's out of your price range. If you want I can do this instead. It's more or less what you want but a single Wish should do the trick."

[taltamir]

Then you get the benefits, and he gets screwed as he is the caster. Everyone wins!

you can be screwed too...
example:
NPC = Wizard who casts the wish
PC = player who buys the wish

PC: I want to wish to be immortal
NPC: *casts wish* "I wish he *points* was immortal"...

Who do you think will be screwed here? the problem with wish isn't casting it, its that it draws the attention of the universe (The DM) and the universe hates you.

[Lysander]

PC: I want to wish to be immortal


Congratulations! You've just joined the sentient undead!

A few more wishes:

I wish that [person PC loves] would fall in love with me out of their own free will.

I wish I always knew the best thing to do.

I wish to save this wish, so I can use this wish's magic however I choose at a more convenient time in the future.

I wish I was a powerful wizard instead of a fighter.

[drengnikrafe]

I wish that [person PC loves] would fall in love with me out of their own free will.
That one is really sticky. I'm not quite sure what "Sticky" means in this context, besides that I'm not sure what it would do. If I were DMing this... I would probably go for full fulfillment.


I wish I always knew the best thing to do.
+1 Insight bonus to everything you do. Doesn't stack with itself. Outside of that, you're basically asking the DM to play your character (which I would be tempted to do).


I wish to save this wish, so I can use this wish's magic however I choose at a more convenient time in the future.
Gain a ring of 3 wishes with only one wish left. However, it takes up one of your ring slots, and cannot be taken off.


I wish I was a powerful wizard instead of a fighter.
Do you have levels in fighter? Like, this is you asking a Wizard to cast it on you? Trade levels in fighter for an equal number in Wizard. Or, possibly sorcerer, since that's a lot easier to justify, fluff wise.

[Yuki Akuma]

I wish that [person PC loves] would fall in love with me out of their own free will.

The wish casts Charm Person on the target. Possibly permanent.


I wish I always knew the best thing to do.

You'd get a custom Phylactery of Faithfulness (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/magicItems/wondrousItems.htm#phylacteryofFaithfulness), possibly with an Augury ability.


I wish to save this wish, so I can use this wish's magic however I choose at a more convenient time in the future.

Ring of Three Wishes with only one wish left appears on your finger. Go you.


I wish I was a powerful wizard instead of a fighter.

One of your Fighter levels is retrained into a Wizard level. You can keep retraining if you want.

[taltamir]

Congratulations! You've just joined the sentient undead!

exactly, you did, not the person who cast the wish.
My point was that wish punishes the "beneficiary" of the spell. It doesn't matter who is the caster and who is the target. The person who is supposed to benefit from the wish is the one who will be punished instead.

Example:
Wizard casts wish, says "I wish my enemy was destroyed". The "target" of the spell is the enemy, but as the wish is worded the wizard caster is the beneficiary, thus he is the one who will suffer from the wish, not his enemy.

Example 2:
wizard casts a wish on behalf of a client, says "i wish my client's enemy was destroyed" The target of the spell is the enemy, the supposed beneficiary is the client... thus the client will suffer the most (although the wizard and enemy being accomplices of the wish are also likely to suffer; just not as likely as the supposed beneficiary).

Example 3:
Cast a wish saying, I wish I was immortal... you suffer. You are now the "target" of the spell, but because you are the beneficiary of the spell you are the one who will be screwed (the most)

Example 4:
Pay someone to cast a wish telling him "i wish i was immortal", he casts it saying "i wish he was immortal". You are now the "target" of the spell, but because you are the beneficiary of the spell you are the one who will be screwed (the most).

In every case it doesn't matter who is the caster, who is the target, etc... all that matters is who is supposed to benefit from the wish by its wording, whomever it is, he is screwed... this is why the spell is called suicide.

BTW, you should consult with the player on the idea of making him undead, it is a possible choice, but you should really present the player with several options and let him choose which result occurs.

[Grumman]

I wish that [person PC loves] would fall in love with me out of their own free will.
They notice the PC and fall in love if and only if they were already so inclined. You can't make someone fall in love "of their own free will".

[taltamir]

The wish casts Charm Person on the target. Possibly permanent.

that is not out of their own free will... for it to be out of their free will they must be unaffected... solution? affect yourself...

You instantly change your physical appearance, age, gender, accent, weight, etc to that most attractive to the person you wished to love you. You trade skill points (and maybe more than just that... aka, psychic reformation) away from some non needed skills to skills that would impress the target, including a "perform (seduction)" skill. If we are being generous here, subtle forces occur to place you both in a situation where you get to "impress" the other person. (ex, you get to save said person from an orc raid, or said person watches you save an orphan from a burning building, etc)

[Dimers]

"I wish for everything within one mile to be in a state of eternal winter."

[taltamir]

"I wish for everything within one mile to be in a state of eternal winter."

everything within a mile is in a state of eternal winter... for X months until the spell runs out of power.
X to be determined later

[Yuki Akuma]

"I wish for everything within one mile to be in a state of eternal winter."

Control Weather. Maybe permanent, considering a one-mile radius is rather small for Control Weather, but then again it's a 7th-level spell...

[Blackfang108]

"Dude, look that's going to be extra. You'd need like...two wishes and some additional support spellcasting to pull off that. If you want I can calculate how much but let's be frank. It's out of your price range. If you want I can do this instead. It's more or less what you want but a single Wish should do the trick."

So the extra 25000 gold is useless to him, then? 'cause that's the price of the XP using the PHB guidelines. I haven't even paid for the spell yet.

(5g per xp * 5000 xp.)

Assuiming I'm trying to do something within the safe guidelines, I dont' see why you'd do this.

[JohnnyCancer]

Turning into an eagle or speaking every language sounds cool and fun. Teleporting the phylactry sounds uncool and not fun, so if I was the DM I wouldn't allow it.

[taltamir]

So the extra 25000 gold is useless to him, then? 'cause that's the price of the XP using the PHB guidelines. I haven't even paid for the spell yet.

(5g per xp * 5000 xp.)

Assuiming I'm trying to do something within the safe guidelines, I dont' see why you'd do this.

a wish can safely wish for 25,000gp stack of coins. Why would he risk making odd unsafe wishes for the same amount of money?

[akma]

Here are some ideas for troublesome wishes:
"I wish for world peace."
"I wish I knew how to annoy the hell out of *insert a god name here*"
"I wish I knew how to annoy *insert a god name here* a lot, but not enough for him to kill me"
"I wish all humans skin would turn green."
"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."

[Sstoopidtallkid]

Here are some ideas for troublesome wishes:
"I wish for world peace."
"I wish I knew how to annoy the hell out of *insert a god name here*"
"I wish I knew how to annoy *insert a god name here* a lot, but not enough for him to kill me"
"I wish all humans skin would turn green."
"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."1 and 5 are intentiona campaign breakers and deserve to be punished. 2 and 3 are ripe for 'not quite killing' levels of divine retribution. 4...no clue.

[Myou]

Here are some ideas for troublesome wishes:
"I wish for world peace."
"I wish I knew how to annoy the hell out of *insert a god name here*"
"I wish I knew how to annoy *insert a god name here* a lot, but not enough for him to kill me"
"I wish all humans skin would turn green."
"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."

1, way beyod the normal scope. An opportunity will soon arise for you to personally secure world peace for now at least, but should you succeed it will be at the cost of your life. It's up to you to take it or not.

2 & 3, you could ask more within reason. You get a tome detailing the personality of the god, including what angers and what appeals to him.

4, that's just being an *******, as well as being way beyond the power of Wish. The spell fails and your XP is wasted.

5, beyond the spell's power. It works, but only for the day.



I wish for my spellbook to have infinite pages.

[Saph]

I wish that [person PC loves] would fall in love with me out of their own free will.

Contradiction in terms - if you're forcing it to happen they're not doing it of their own free will. I'd probably just say the Wish fizzles, no XP loss (as you're trying to wish for a logical paradox).


What if you buy the Wish from a spellcaster?

I can't, off the top of my head, think of any likely situation where a 17th+ level spellcaster would be willing to give up 5,000 XP for some gold.


I wish for my spellbook to have infinite pages.

Sure, have one. Actually, if all you want is a geometry-defying book I'd probably throw in some extras as well.

[Kylarra]

Here are some ideas for troublesome wishes:
"I wish for world peace."
"I wish I knew how to annoy the hell out of *insert a god name here*"
"I wish I knew how to annoy *insert a god name here* a lot, but not enough for him to kill me"
"I wish all humans skin would turn green."
"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."
1. Warped to the future when everyone is dead.
2. You find out ... then your head explodes.
3. See 2.
4. Your vision changes so that all humans you perceive have green skin. Color being a subjective thing of course.
5. You succeed ... unfortunately it applies only right now and since you're busy patting yourself on the back for this evil scheme, the magic forces you to spend the rest of your days cackling maniacally.

[Saph]

"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."

I'd say that it works . . . but only as a permanent emanation affecting a 100' radius or so around you. Effectively you've picked up a weird (Su) ability. Probably allows a Will save to negate, at the DC of the Wish. Your presence will have a somewhat odd effect on nearby social interaction from now on.

[Lysander]

Here are some ideas for troublesome wishes:
"I wish for world peace."
"I wish I knew how to annoy the hell out of *insert a god name here*"
"I wish I knew how to annoy *insert a god name here* a lot, but not enough for him to kill me"
"I wish all humans skin would turn green."
"I wish that everyone that thinks of an evil scheme, no matter how minor or insignificant it is, will be forced to laugh an evil laughter after he devises his scheme, and that his laughter should be at least 12 seconds long."

1. This could go several ways. It might cast a few dozen Calm Emotion spells around the world to pause a number of major battles. Maybe it would place a Geas on a few warlike kings and command them to become pacifists. Both would be temporary solutions, and probably make people angry at you. Or maybe the spell would just teleport you to an uninhabited plane.
2. This would replicate Legend Lore and tell you something that would annoy deity the deity. It wouldn't in and of itself do anything to the deity. You might not necessarily be able to do whatever it is.
3. Same as above, but it would reveal something that would annoy them less.
4. You're cursed with a unique form of magical colorblindness that makes human flesh tones appear green. This gives you a +2 bonus to your spot check to find humans hiding in a non-green background, -2 when they try to hide in green backgrounds.
5. Permanent magical effect centered on you with a radius of 20 feet. Anyone in that range who comes up with an evil scheme must make a Will save or laugh, including you. Someone who makes their will save is immune to the effect for 24 hours.


I wish for my spellbook to have infinite pages.
Granted. You gain a spellbook that starts with 100 pages. Whenever you write a spell on the last page another page appears. It never weighs more or takes up more space than a 100 page spell book. OR alternatively, you get a 1,000 page book. Any spell regardless of level fits on a single page.

[lsfreak]

I can't, off the top of my head, think of any likely situation where a 17th+ level spellcaster would be willing to give up 5,000 XP for some gold.

One with a thought bottle? That's right, I went there.

As for buying a wish off someone: provided the other person is neutral or friendly, it should work exactly as if you cast it yourself. After all, whether you wish or someone else does, the outcome should be the same. The only difference is if they want something bad to happen to you, in which case they'll reword the wish in such a way something goes wrong. (Basically, the same problem as getting wishes off Efreeti or the like, who will purposely twist wishes. In this case, however, the caster rewords the wish such that there is a clear flaw, rather than the efreeti twisting the wish itself).

[Saph]

One with a thought bottle?

You missed the part where I said likely situation. :P

Point is, if you're a near-epic caster, you almost certainly have more money than you know what to do with. Trying to pay them to do something that requires personal sacrifice is like trying to bribe Bill Gates.

[Myou]

Some new ones;

1. I wish for the ability to use Sneak Attack as if all my levels were rogue levels, for one round per day.

2. I wish to learn one extra spell of each level known (as a sorcerer).

3. I wish to never incur attacks of opportunity.

4. I wish to gain a bonus feat of my choice when I next level up.

5. I wish to gain permanent invisibility as an extraordinary ability that I can turn on and off as a swift action.

[tyckspoon]

Some new ones;

1. I wish for the ability to use Sneak Attack as if all my levels were rogue levels, for one round per day.

2. I wish to learn one extra spell of each level known (as a sorcerer).

3. I wish to never incur attacks of opportunity.

4. I wish to gain a bonus feat of my choice when I next level up.

5. I wish to gain permanent invisibility as an extraordinary ability that I can turn on and off as a swift action.

1. Granted in full.

2. You gain the Extra Spell feat. In deference to the XP paid, it is with the more permissive reading that allows you to grab the spell from whatever spell list you feel like.

3. Hah no. You gain one of the Epic "you do not incur an Attack of Opportunity for X action" feats and/or an improved version of Mobility for defense against the other ones.

4. Granted, with the proviso that you must qualify for the bonus feat normally.

5. You are PaO'd into a Pixie.

[Lysander]

I wish for the power to will people dead.

I wish for a perfect duplicate of myself, another creature with my exact body, memories, abilities, and goals so that we may work together on the benevolent heroic missions I frequently go on.

I wish to be transported to the precise place in all of existence that it would be most favorable for me to be at right now.

I wish to go back in time to [traumatic childhood event] to change things for the better.

I wish to gain the favor of a god.

I wish to temporarily be a much more powerful version of myself for the next few hours so I am better suited for the coming battle against [powerful BBEG].

I wish for complete immunity to all harmful mind-affecting magic and psionics.

[Kelb_Panthera]

I wish for the power to will people dead.

I wish for a perfect duplicate of myself, another creature with my exact body, memories, abilities, and goals so that we may work together on the benevolent heroic missions I frequently go on.

I wish to be transported to the precise place in all of existence that it would be most favorable for me to be at right now.

I wish to go back in time to [traumatic childhood event] to change things for the better.

I wish to gain the favor of a god.

I wish to temporarily be a much more powerful version of myself for the next few hours so I am better suited for the coming battle against [powerful BBEG].

I wish for complete immunity to all harmful mind-affecting magic and psionics.


1: you get something like Destruction 1/day as a Su. Saving throw DC = 10 +1/2 of your HD + your cha modifier. If it is successful the targets remains are not destroyed.

2: Granted, but you v2.0 has no gear and you immediately lose one level, while he immediately loses 2, as a backlash from the tremendous strain on the spell. Basically a permanent version of the power fission that can't be dispelled. Naturally, you v2.0 is under DM control as an npc and may (probably will) decide to leave the group after a time.

3: granted, but since you didn't specify who it would be favorable for, you're now providing soft-cover for someone you don't know, and have no clue where you are. If you survive, it turns out that the person that you just took a hit for, is someone really important in the grand scheme of things.

4: *NO TIME TRAVEL!!!*

5: Granted, but the god knows that you wished for this and only went with it because he found it flattering.

6: You are subjected to an inspire greatness effect, except that it grants 5 bonus HD instead of the normal 2 and only for the next 2 hours.

7: your int becomes int: -

[taltamir]

I wish for the power to will people dead.
thats a tough one... wish can wish people dead, but giving you the ability to do so? well, it could give you the ability to do so once, but that is kinda of a waste.
I think give the player a choice, PaO into a creature that has some sort of death attack, or get to ONCE "will" someone dead with the effect as if a wish was cast to kill that person.
Or maybe get a 1/day death ability with really low DC save.


I wish for a perfect duplicate of myself, another creature with my exact body, memories, abilities, and goals so that we may work together on the benevolent heroic missions I frequently go on.
This is actually within the wish's safe powers... it simply casts clone:
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/clone.htm


I wish to be transported to the precise place in all of existence that it would be most favorable for me to be at right now.
ouch for the DM... plot hook time, you are transported to a nice new adventure somewhere in the multiverse with nice rewards should you survive.


I wish to go back in time to [traumatic childhood event] to change things for the better.
You are temporarily taken out of the timestream, you then relive the memory in your mind, only now get to do things differently, then quickly relive a few other key parts of your life that have changed due to it, however, random chance will force the major aspects of your life to remain the same. At the end you have a new set of memories without time actually being altered.
Then, everyone who was involved in said actions and aftermath must make a will safe or believe in those new memories. You are then reinserted into the time stream with a new set of memories which, as far as you and anyone who has failed their will save, is true.


I wish to gain the favor of a god.
A god of a suitable alignment and predisposition is informed of your wish by your wish and offers you a quest (should you take/succeed in the quest, you will gain his/her favor)


I wish to temporarily be a much more powerful version of myself for the next few hours so I am better suited for the coming battle against [powerful BBEG].
neat wish, granted.


I wish for complete immunity to all harmful mind-affecting magic and psionics.
The wish duplicates the spell mindblank, since this is a pretty crappy use of a wish, you might get a partial XP refund, or your mindblank will last for some time (a few weeks, maybe months)


7: your int becomes int: -

the worst interpretation of that should be "the wish duplicates mind blank"... he wished for exactly the effect of mindblank, he didn't even specify a duration, and mindblank is certainly within the "safe" list of spells wish can emulate


1: you get something like Destruction 1/day as a Su. Saving throw DC = 10 +1/2 of your HD + your cha modifier. If it is successful the targets remains are not destroyed.

that is a bit on the strong side...

[Myou]

5. You are PaO'd into a Pixie.

That made me chuckle - I considered playing one once, but they were a bit too ugly.


1. The wish is already fulfilled - you can wish all you like, and that's a close as you can get with the power of the spell.

2. You get a clone, a via the spell, inactive until your demise, a partial fulfillment.

3. Granted, the location yields important plot-relevent information and gives the opportunity of a sidequest for good xp and plenty of treasure.

4. You go back in time temporarily to witness the event but end up discovering that your adult self's actions after going back in time caused it, and cannot prevent it. (I'd tell you before hand that you wouldn't be able to change the past if you made the wish.)

5. A minor god will grant you a free Resurrection dead next time you die.

6. You gain a level in your chosen class, but then lose it again two hours later.

7. You get a Mind Blank effect for a week.



I wish for a permanent bonus of +10 to my maximum HP.

[Kylarra]

I wish for complete immunity to all harmful mind-affecting magic and psionics.
Mindswitched into a sandwich.

[taltamir]

Mindswitched into a sandwich.

So, you kill a player for wishing for the effects of "protection from evil" instead of specifying a spells name to emulate? harsh


I wish for a permanent bonus of +10 to my maximum HP.

You get a +1 to con, which might be a partial fulfilment (if you had even con) or even overfulfilment (if you had odd con; and cast the wish yourself, you would get 17HP)

Alternatively, you just gain +10 to HP...


I wish for complete immunity to all harmful mind-affecting magic and psionics.
now that i think about it, forget mindblank... protection from evil/law/chaos/order all provide that effect, as a level 1 spell available to clerics AND wizards.
This is why enchantment is at the top of the "to ban" list of spell schools... what use is it if everyone and their dog is immune to it via a level 1 spell?

Actually I would go one further. You get a permanancied protection from (opposite alignment) spell... granting you complete immunity to all mind affecting spells, SLA, abilities, etc (from any alignment) and some other bonuses like bonus to AC vs the opposing alignment.

[Foryn Gilnith]

This thread makes me realize how much I despise wish. I despise how vague it is, I despise how it goes against my perception of arcane magic, I despise how it's a waste of 5000 XP, I despise how the RAW-assured effects are pathetically weak, I despise how people expect Wish to be more powerful than I think it ought to be.


You get a permanancied protection from (opposite alignment) spell... granting you complete immunity to all mind affecting spells, SLA, abilities, etc

Uh...
Explain to me how Protection from Evil (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/protectionFromevil.htm) stops Mind Thrust (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/psionic/powers/mindThrust.htm)?

[taltamir]

This thread makes me realize how much I despise wish. I despise how vague it is, I despise how it goes against my perception of arcane magic, I despise how it's a waste of 5000 XP, I despise how the RAW-assured effects are pathetically weak, I despise how people expect Wish to be more powerful than I think it ought to be.

surely you have more reasons than that to despise it :) (no sarcasm, I am serious)...

all that you listed is true about why wish utterly sucks, but there are so many MORE reasons to hate that spell...

[tyckspoon]

So, you kill a player for wishing for the effects of "protection from evil" instead of specifying a spells name to emulate? harsh



You get a +1 to con, which might be a partial fulfilment (if you had even con) or even overfulfilment (if you had odd con; and cast the wish yourself, you would get 17HP)

Alternatively, you just gain +10 to HP...


There actually is a procedure that ends up making you into an inanimate object with your mind and psionic powers attached. If you acquired the Construct traits along the way it would satisfy the wish. A sandwich was originally chosen for absurdity value; it could be anything.

For the HP wish, I'd just go ahead and grant the HP and wonder why the player asked for that little. Improved Toughness would be worth 17, and Epic Toughness is 30. For 5,000 XP I'm quite willing to grant a weak feat.

[Roland St. Jude]

Sheriff of Moddingham: This is more game than discussion.