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Fiery Diamond
2010-02-15, 06:22 PM
Well, I have no idea whether I'll be making a series of threads with "How should one run X as a DM/How do you all run X as DMs?" as the subjects, but just in case I do, I thought I'd establish precedent with the thread title.

Anyway...

The question is this: What do you all think is the best way to run romance in a D&D (or other roleplaying game, but I'm doing D&D so it would help if we spoke mostly about that style of game) game? Consider, if you will, the following variables:

Age of DM
Age of Players
Maturity of DM and Players
Comfort Level of DM and Players with subject matter
Sex/Gender of DM and Players
Sexual Preferences of DM and Players
Sex/Gender and Sexual Preferences of characters
Level of Seriousness of Campaign (on a silly to serious sliding scale)
Level of Grittiness of Campaign (on a happy sunshine to evil dark doom sliding scale)
Amount of roleplaying vs. rollplaying of the Players and DM
Whether the Players or DM are in RL relationships
...and any others I may have forgotten.

In addition to advice and beliefs about the best way of doing things, I'd also enjoy hearing some success stories (and potentially some failure stories as well) for IC romance.

Now my particular situation:

DM: College Male, Heterosexual, pretty mature (actually, in contrast to the immature and crass way the world at large seems to act about such things, very mature), not comfortable with roleplaying anything to do with sex but very rather comfortable roleplaying things to do with crushes and love not including sex, more focused on roleplaying than just rolling dice, not in a RL relationship.

Campaign: Moderately serious and not dark but not rosy either; some silliness, but threats to the world and peoples' deaths are taken very seriously, as are any jobs the characters take.

Players:

Player 1: College Male, Heterosexual, pretty mature (as mature as the DM), no clue how comfortable he is with the stuff I'm not comfortable with, but he is comfortable with the things I am, more focused on roleplaying than just rolling dice, not in a RL relationship.
Character 1: Male Heterosexual.

Player 2: College Female, Heterosexual (or possibly asexual, by her own admission), fairly mature (not as much as the DM, but she knows how to act as mature as the DM and will do so if asked), as long as it's entirely IC she is comfortable with most likely more than I am but if it is perceived as OOC she would freak out with even minor stuff, more focused on roleplaying than just rolling dice, not in a RL relationship.
Character 2: Female Heterosexual.

And I also have 2 more players, but they are vanishingly unlikely to want their characters to have romantic relationships and one of them would be very immature about it if it occurred.

I have spoken to both Player 1 and Player 2 and they are OK with having their characters get involved romantically.

So...what does the playground have to say about running romance, but in general and in my specific case?

denthor
2010-02-15, 06:29 PM
follow there lead and have them start the conversation.

Giggling Ghast
2010-02-15, 06:31 PM
Is this a roleplaying choice made by the players, or by the DM? The latter is a recipe for disaster.

Keep it to little stuff: compliments, the occassional flirting, etc. As a DM, you can set up situations like mentioning a meadow of pretty flowers, which hopefully one of the players takes as a cue to give to the other. If sex comes up, you fade to black.

Hiisi
2010-02-15, 06:54 PM
If it's run by players in mutual understanding I don't think the DM needs to worry about it, I'd let the players sort it out and just roll with it. If it's the DMs idea I sure hope they're up for the task. It can make everyone extremely uncomfortable and personally I don't see what a "forced" relationship like that would bring to the table.

Also I'd be vary of the player you think would be immature if a romance happened on him. He can goof around if it happens to someone else aswell.

...

And now that I think about it, I'd be a bit worried about the female player aswell if she has a tendency to freak out about OOC stuff. Romances tend to attract a lot of OOC jokes and with enough bad taste and a dash of misunderstandings, you've cooked yourself some trouble.

drengnikrafe
2010-02-15, 06:54 PM
Let me tell you a short story. Every time my party enters a town, they get something I call "Shenanigan Time". They harass taverns, haggle with shopkeepers, create connections, steal stuff... They do so one (sometimes 2) at a time. They are allowed to do about 2 or 3 things with descriptions (the rest of it is assumed to be purchased or sold, or whatever else, at normal price, or whatever else). If I were DMing this, I would put their time alone in that time frame, and only roleplay what people were absolutely 100% comfortable with. The moment somebody even began to get uncomfortable, call off the roleplaying elements. Fade out, and move on to somebody else.

illyrus
2010-02-15, 06:58 PM
From my gaming experience in the case of two players initiating it and keeping it reasonable all goes well (with a few jokes at the table). DM created romance I've never seen pulled off even close to well.

Fiery Diamond
2010-02-15, 07:05 PM
So so far the advice seems to be: Don't force it on players, just run with it wherever the player takes it, and keep it where everyone is 100% comfortable. Seems like pretty sound advice to me. Anything in particular that I should watch out for?

Superglucose
2010-02-15, 07:05 PM
DM Created romance is fail. In my current game that I'm playing in, we have one player (RPing as my character's half-sister) is trying to gain the attention of another character who doesn't seem to notice, while I have an off-screen NPC as a fiance (the reason I'm adventuring). It works ok because the GM lets me control this NPC.

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-15, 07:19 PM
DM: College Male, Heterosexual, pretty mature (actually, in contrast to the immature and crass way the world at large seems to act about such things, very mature), not comfortable with roleplaying anything to do with sex but very rather comfortable roleplaying things to do with crushes and love not including sex, more focused on roleplaying than just rolling dice, not in a RL relationship.
This passage sent up a warning flare for me.
A question - that you need not answer in public - is whether you (presuming you are the DM) have been in a relationship (committed or otherwise) up to this point. If no, then roleplaying a relationship is likely to be highly awkward, whatever your perceived maturity level If yes, then do you still have "baggage" from those previous relationships? If so, then there is a high probability that it will sneak into the game - and not in a good way.

No, this isn't a slight against you, personally - emotions are just funny that way.

Anyhoo, any relationship "set up" by the DM is likely doomed to failure. Between players, emotional attachments must remain outside of DM control; it is literally the most intimate of roleplaying exercises. In such a circumstance there is nothing for you, as the DM to do save throw in external pressures from time-to-time. Note, however, that trying to set up plot hooks via intra-PC relationships is even more difficult than using other PC relationships to set up hooks.

A relationship between an NPC and a PC, OTOH, is going to be whatever the player makes of it. If you feel highly comfortable with engaging in emotional roleplay (as opposed to dramatic roleplay) and the player seems game, then good luck. Be forewarned that, unless you are already emotionally close with the players involved (e.g. comfortable with interacting at an emotional level) these sorts of RP exercises tend to fizzle.

From your description of the group involved, I would not "push" anything in this area if I had a gun to my head.
Aside from the fact that the (likely lone) Female is already known to "freak" about emotional issues (and let's face it, in a mostly-male group that's pretty reasonable), you haven't considered the impact that having "relationship RP" would have on the other people at the table. Relationship RP can soak up a lot of time (and be boring for people not interested in such things) and can make the other people uncomfortable even when they're not directly involved.

Full Disclosure: I am (decidedly) post-college and have tried to run games centered around relationships in past. While my players were all quite eager, I found that I, personally, lacked the ability to "keep up" and, as a result the game floundered. Additionally, the best "relationship RP" I have seen comes from "old hands" who either have had a lot of relationships (and have thick emotional skins) or from married/deeply committed people. IMHO these are the types of people who have sorted out their emotional lives sufficiently to engage in this sort of "fantasy play" without risking internal disorder.

taltamir
2010-02-15, 07:30 PM
I don't think roleplaying relationships can be anything but awkward.

the one and only semi-exception is if people are in a real relationship, they can "roleplay" a relationship between their characters. (but thats more of mary suism than roleplay)

Of course, people are more then welcome to TRY roleplaying a relationship... and as far as I am concerned that is between THEM. that is, the DM should stay the hell out of it, and so should any player who isn't explicitly interested in doing so.
Also, roleplaying something you aren't get become EXTREMELY offensive...

EX: a male should not be "role playing" a sexually active woman, a heterosexual should not "role play" homosexuality, etc...

I am not saying "the DM should outright forbid them from doing so", but you should point out to them that unless its their cute little way of coming out of the closet, that it might be terribly offensive.

Just as you should be weary of a person of a stated religion or race explicitly saying he wants to "roleplay" someone of another race or religion.

Glimbur
2010-02-15, 07:43 PM
I've seen attempts at romance in Wuthering (http://www.unseelie.org/rpg/wh/index.html) Heights (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BW3gKKiTvjs) games I have run. They've all been one shots, so things proceeded somewhat more frantically, but it worked out fairly well with several different groups of players. There were only light to moderate amounts of RP to it, more explanation of a character's action followed by me deciding how the NPC responded.

And then there were all the deaths. I'm pretty sure those were unrelated to the romance, except for the character in love with his sister. That got a little awkward.

taltamir
2010-02-15, 07:47 PM
romance with an NPC? thats even more akward... "No I will not roleplay THAT with you, thank you very much" :P

of course, it might be a valid way to pick up a gamer babe... start a "romance" between your character and hers... strictly "in character" of course (pfft, yea right :P)

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-15, 08:07 PM
I've seen attempts at romance in Wuthering (http://www.unseelie.org/rpg/wh/index.html) Heights (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BW3gKKiTvjs) games I have run. They've all been one shots, so things proceeded somewhat more frantically, but it worked out fairly well with several different groups of players. There were only light to moderate amounts of RP to it, more explanation of a character's action followed by me deciding how the NPC responded.

And then there were all the deaths. I'm pretty sure those were unrelated to the romance, except for the character in love with his sister. That got a little awkward.
You want a relationship game? You play Bliss Stage (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BlissStage) - game was developed specifically because there were no games with Relationship Mechanics out there.

The trick to running a game like this successfully is for the DM to use verbal Sexy Discretion Shots (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SexyDiscretionShot) before he gets uncomfortable. It helps to define where "the action" of a game is willing to go without becoming obtrusive.

MlleRouge
2010-02-15, 08:22 PM
Romance in role play can work out fine as long as it develops in character (rather then being influenced by IRL feelings or mandated by the DM) and everyone is comfortable.

In the last game I ran, a heterosexual male player had a homosexual male character who developed a relationship with one of my male NPCs (I am a female player). It worked out fine, though some of the other characters snickered at them playfully. That was okay.

In the same game, a male player/male character with a crush on me in real life attempted to play romance with a female NPC (who didn't recieve him well, I might add), and the result was very creepy behavior towards me as a person. That was not okay.

Ive also had three characters form relationships with NPCs in past games, one of whom was my male character who was married twice and had an affair. Of the other two, one was male and the other female, with an NPC and another player respectively.


Moral of the story: If it's kept in character, develops naturally by the player's choice and everyone stays comfortable, romance in role play works just fine. If someone brings real life into it or something turns up that someone isn't comfortable with, it can get ugly.

DabblerWizard
2010-02-15, 08:46 PM
Romance can have a place in roleplaying games, up to a certain point.

I wouldn't want to describe explicit sexual scenes as a DM, not because I'm uncomfortable with the subject, but because that sort of theme is not why I'm sitting at the table. As far as emotional relationships and sensual cuddling, I wouldn't mind that kind of description.

When it comes to PC/NPC relationships, my players and I are all fairly mature, and all fairly vocal about our comfort levels, so if someone explicitly wanted an IC relationship with an NPC, for instance, I'd certainly consider it, and give it a bit of screen time.

Coincidentally, when it comes to sexual orientation, my group of players is fairly split between gays and straights. It's also fairly split between males and females. All of that, along with mature post college aged people, makes for a fairly rational, respectful group when it comes to IC romance, of whatever normative sort.

Saintheart
2010-02-15, 10:04 PM
Handling romance in D&D?

Book of Erotic Fantasy. :smallbiggrin:









... Oh, come on! Somebody had to say it! :smallbiggrin:

drengnikrafe
2010-02-15, 10:06 PM
Handling romance in D&D?

Book of Erotic Fantasy. :smallbiggrin:









... Oh, come on! Somebody had to say it! :smallbiggrin:

I would offer that homebrewing something off the top of your head would be a whole lot better than... ever... touching that book.
Why, oh why, did you have to dredge up repressed memories?

Zanatos777
2010-02-15, 10:21 PM
Had a romance (PC to PC, PC to NPC is actually standard fair) in a game I ran last year. One was actually a love triangle where all the players were male and only one character was female. I just let the players do things their own way and had the NPCs react accordingly. Allow them to get into their characters. I wouldn't RP any sex scenes or anything else they don't feel like doing like if they have a candlelight dinner or something.

It made the game very memorable as the romance became a long running plot. It ended with one of the male characters dying tragically due to a third party (immediately avenged by another third party who saw him as a father figure) and spoke his last words in the woman's arms. Everyone was very happy with the way it worked out. I guess the point of that was that if you think your players can do it well it can be very rewarding.

Lawless III
2010-02-15, 10:21 PM
http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=951

I have always avoided romance in DnD because I firmly blieve this is the only possible outcome.

bosssmiley
2010-02-16, 10:18 AM
Making sure it's a genre-appropriate thematic element helps, a lot. People take this kind of thing more seriously if there's genre precedent for it. Think grand passions, not goo-goo eyes.

Pendragon RPG - an entire chapter on Amor, Courtly Love and Passionate Inspiration, also mad knights jousting in carts. A cultural inability to keep off other men's wives is the whole reason the Matter of Britain is a great tragedy.
En Garde - mechanics for romance, negotiable affection, multiple mistresses, being a noblewoman's bit of rough on the side ("roll for wandering jealous husband check"), and for duelling rivals for the affections of the beautiful, fickle mademoiselles. Cyrano approves.
Legend of the Five Rings - the first Winter Court book was all about the fallout from a tragic love affair (Hoturi and Kachiko). Oriental happy ending: everybody dies!
Jane Austen is actually good reading here. Although tv and movie adaptations always play up the romance in her stories the original books were really about everything but the proposal, the first kiss, et blah. Those are almost never dealt with 'on screen'. Austen's romances actively subverted the genre conventions of romance novels of the time. She refuses to deliver the expected (and thus boring) genre 'money shots' of literary romance. That's no accident, it's an active stylistic choice. This makes her great for RPing, coz you can talk about everything else, yet retain romance as a subtext.

Pro-tip: tragedy. When people are suddenly dying because of it, suddenly romance ain't so sissy any more. But then I consider Romeo and Juliet a great gang war story ruined by an intrusive romance subplot.

(pearls before swine)

Dervag
2010-02-16, 12:22 PM
Also, roleplaying something you aren't get become EXTREMELY offensive...

EX: a male should not be "role playing" a sexually active woman, a heterosexual should not "role play" homosexuality, etc...I think this depends very heavily on the quality of the role-player as an actor, and their ability to see past the level of stereotypes.

A heterosexual whose idea of "role playing" homosexuals is to invoke every insulting and stupid stereotype in the book is doing no good at all. A grownup, on the other hand, might do a much better job.

I mean, take this to its logical conclusion and you wind up with the notion that no one can handle any character who isn't, basically, them. That's a nightmare if you're the DM (how is a female DM supposed to handle male NPCs or vice versa). For that matter, it has implications for the rest of fiction (can straight male actors play gay male characters convincingly in a TV show or movie? Can they write convincing gay male characters in a book?).

So I don't think I agree with you on this.

Grumman
2010-02-16, 02:43 PM
I think this depends very heavily on the quality of the role-player as an actor, and their ability to see past the level of stereotypes.

A heterosexual whose idea of "role playing" homosexuals is to invoke every insulting and stupid stereotype in the book is doing no good at all. A grownup, on the other hand, might do a much better job.

I mean, take this to its logical conclusion and you wind up with the notion that no one can handle any character who isn't, basically, them. That's a nightmare if you're the DM (how is a female DM supposed to handle male NPCs or vice versa). For that matter, it has implications for the rest of fiction (can straight male actors play gay male characters convincingly in a TV show or movie? Can they write convincing gay male characters in a book?).

So I don't think I agree with you on this.
I feel the same way. As Richard Bartle said, if you can play a 900 year old ninja elf, you can play someone of the opposite gender.

Proven_Paradox
2010-02-16, 03:39 PM
I've actually run a successful (but short) bit of romance roleplay in one of my games, DM initiated.

Full story:
First off, note that I am a straight male. That said, this is play by post, so that wasn't really an issue. Anyway.

The party Bard wants to look up information on an arcane disease afflicting an important NPC who will be travelling with the party soon. The region they're traveling is predisposed to wild magic zone, and he is (rightly) concerned her condition interacting with wild magic would be disastrous. So, off to the library to study up on this condition.

While there, reading a book that gives him some insight on VIP NPC's condition (along with "we never tried wild magic because that would be stupid and unsafe" for those wondering), he notes another lady studying a spellbook in theory, and 'studying' him in practice, obviously infatuated.

Now, this bard's backstory includes losing a wife and child in the disaster that sets the whole campaign off a month or so before this scene. I'm expecting him to do something along the lines of gently telling her no. The only thing my PCs have been consistent about is not doing what I expect though, so it doesn't surprise me too much when he walks over and starts flirting. The scene that follows has been called 'very cute' by a couple of outside observers, and served to develops the Bard's character quite a bit.

The whole thing stands entirely unresolved at the moment, as the PCs headed out on a side mission the day after. I'm still not entirely sure where I want to go with that, though I've got a couple of ideas.

Would I have done that scene in a face-to-face game? Probably not. More for the players' benefit than anything else though: it's enough to ask them to pretend the gigantic hairy man before them roleplaying ladies already. Adding flirtation to that is probably too much for everyone involved.

Introducing romance to a game can be done well, but there is a lot to it. The most important thing is to make it clearly, entirely optional though. I know when I'm at a face-to-face game, I'm probably wanting to bust some heads more than I want to do more in-depth emotional exploration of characters. That's best done in the realm of play-by-post I think.

randomhero00
2010-02-16, 03:56 PM
I always avoid roleplaying any kind of romance. I'm a decent roleplayer but I am not an actor. Going into romance tends to require a certain amount of acting talent. Its fine if your group has it/is into that, but beware if you don't...otherwise it'll either be awkward or real feelings will get mixed in. I'm a hetro male...staring into another hetro males eyes as I pretend to profess the love of my character for his female character is just...uncomfortable and cheesy (same would go for a female player.)

The Tygre
2010-02-16, 05:28 PM
I'm able to run romance in my games. I just narrate the scene in third person and generalize. Don't know what's wrong with the rest of you prudes. If you're all having such problems with this... try harder. Ur doin' it wrong, as I believe the young folk say these days.

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-16, 06:55 PM
I'm able to run romance in my games. I just narrate the scene in third person and generalize. Don't know what's wrong with the rest of you prudes. If you're all having such problems with this... try harder. Ur doin' it wrong, as I believe the young folk say these days.
Yeah... you can't run NPC to PC interactions in the third person. Ultimately you need to speak "in character," often in emotional terms.

Even when there is no chance of UST (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/UnresolvedSexualTension?from=Main.UST) it can be difficult to accurately portray the sorts of emotions involved - well, for those of us with less than 100% emotional stability. When there is UST, well, let's just say Thar Be Dragons.

The Tygre
2010-02-16, 07:59 PM
Yeah... you can't run NPC to PC interactions in the third person. Ultimately you need to speak "in character," often in emotional terms.

Clearly, you can. Then again, I'm not making romance the center-piece of the campaign, just kind of a side-NPC-thing. Might be different depending on scale.

Calmar
2010-02-16, 08:18 PM
So...what does the playground have to say about running romance, but in general and in my specific case?

Huh, what is it good for? :smallconfused:

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-16, 08:27 PM
Clearly, you can. Then again, I'm not making romance the center-piece of the campaign, just kind of a side-NPC-thing. Might be different depending on scale.
Perhaps I am misunderstanding "In the third person."

My conception is thus:
Third Person: Matilda the Barmaid responds approvingly to your advances
First Person (Matilda): "My, that's a big sword you have."

Obviously, when seducing barmaids one need not go beyond the Third. But if, say, a PC is striking up a romance with a fellow traveler NPC who you intend to be plot-important, it may be nice - if not required - for you to speak "in voice" from time to time. Otherwise the player is unlikely to be as emotionally invested in said NPC when the inevitable Friend or Idol Decision (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FriendOrIdolDecision) comes up.

It's the same reason you speak in-voice at all - to heighten the emotional response of the player. However, delivering a Villainous Monologue (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EvilGloating) is unlikely to require the same range of emotions as tet-a-tet with the Mad Scientist's Beautiful Daughter (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ptitlejhfmx9xo4le0?from=Main.MadScientistsBeautifu lDaughter) over dinner. The former is clearly a flight of fancy, but the latter may inevitably become contaminated with any UST (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/UnresolvedSexualTension?from=Main.UST) floating around.

Chaelos
2010-02-16, 08:28 PM
First off, this subject always makes me think of this comic (http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=951).

To the OP: I'm unclear if you're asking whether:

A) You, the DM, should nudge/force PC's into romantic relationships or
B) The PC's themselves should be allowed to explore the possibility of such a relationship forming.

If A, absolutely not.
If B, definitely--but don't let it take center stage. If the spotlight is stolen by star-crossed lovers, the rest of the characters will feel left out and bored (or, worse for you in a dramatic sense, they'll take my crew's approach and make fun of it ad nauseum).

Another factor to consider is whether the game in question is actual tabletop (face-to-face) or online (play by post or some other setup). Online, it's generally not awkward at all for characters to become romantically entwined, but in face-to-face there's inevitably going to be some X factor that leads to a suboptimal result. Since your predicament sounds like a face-to-face game amongst fairly well-acquainted folk, my gut instinct would be to keep things fairly low-key in any character romantic development. "Tasteful" cutting of scenes, things like that.

But, then, my instinct in these situations is usually to keep things low-key.

Thurbane
2010-02-16, 08:43 PM
I misread the title as How to Ruin Romance. :smalltongue:

...judging by my relationship history, I could write a pretty comprehensive handbook on that topic! :smallbiggrin:

(Hint: don't blow off your 1-year anniversary because it falls on game night...)

The Tygre
2010-02-16, 08:54 PM
Perhaps I am misunderstanding "In the third person."

No, you've got third person right. And I do speak in first person for most of the other NPCs. I just know when to pick my battles, so to speak. And honestly, my players are happy about it. It's all about being casual, not getting so entrenched. And I think this applies to the whole conversation, it comes down to whether the DM and the Players trust one another and how secure you are in your own romance and sexuality.

Also, stop linking to TV Tropes. My doctor says I have a co-dependent relationship with that website. I have to stop.

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-16, 09:00 PM
And I think this applies to the whole conversation, it comes down to whether the DM and the Players trust one another and how secure you are in your own romance and sexuality.
Yes, this exactly.

My concern is that the scenario described by the OP does not sound like this and, in my personal experience, the Generic Gamer is not going to be secure "in [their] own romance and sexuality." At the very least the Generic Gamer probably doesn't flex those "relationship muscles" as much as other members of humanity - and we already know that people are complicated (http://xkcd.com/592/) :smalltongue:

So, my comments were more anecdote and Word To The Wise; it is not enough to tell people to "suck it up" when dealing with matters that are famously difficult for Generic Gamers. Obviously there are groups where this isn't a problem (including one, to my knowledge, which has a once-a-year orgy/LARP - in character, of course) but I would suspect they are the exception rather than the rule.

Saintheart
2010-02-17, 02:38 AM
(Hint: don't blow off your 1-year anniversary because it falls on game night...)

Somehow I'm guessing that triggered a 100d6 damage roll to the ears with no saving throw... :smallsmile:

Talkkno
2010-02-17, 02:43 AM
Get your players to play Maid RPG, that should lesson their muscles in that department in a much more relaxed and easy going way. Since its default mode follows the rule of funny and silly. :smallwink:

Debihuman
2010-02-17, 10:25 AM
Don't confuse Romance with Sex. If you really want to run a "romance" the I suggest looking at Blue Rose (a True 20 setting) for ideas. If your players are interested in giving romance a shot, let them but don't let it devolve into debauchery.

Debby

Oracle_Hunter
2010-02-17, 05:48 PM
Don't confuse Romance with Sex. If you really want to run a "romance" the I suggest looking at Blue Rose (a True 20 setting) for ideas. If your players are interested in giving romance a shot, let them but don't let it devolve into debauchery.

Debby
Romance does often lead to sex - that, of course, being the ultimate purpose of romance :smalltongue:

I'm not knocking Courtly Love, mind you, but I'm not sure how realistic it is to engage in a romantic storyline that is completely divorced from sexuality. Well, for the average person who'd have trouble keeping their IRL romantic situation out of IC romances, anyhow.

Calmar
2010-02-17, 05:48 PM
If two PCs want to roleplay a romance, ok. Both apparently agree. But I still don't see the point to bother players with such a thing as a DM in the first place.
Personally, I'm not hanging out in a fantasy world full of mystery and monsters to do the things I can do in real life - just as I don't try too hook up girls for a dungeon crawl, a siege, or the like. :smallwink:

drengnikrafe
2010-02-17, 05:57 PM
(Hint: don't blow off your 1-year anniversary because it falls on game night...)

It's always a difficult moment in my relationships when I tell them they figure out they're less important than gaming...

AslanCross
2010-02-17, 05:59 PM
Age of DM: 26
Age of Players: 16-19
Maturity of DM and Players: I'd say we're fairly mature in general, or at least know when to snap back into serious mode. We sometimes discuss philosophy during over lunch. :P
Comfort Level of DM and Players with subject matter: As far as I can tell, only one of my players has ever asked for a romance with a villain. One of my other players is running a married character, but his wife is offscreen.
Sex/Gender of DM and Players: I'm male. In my current campaign, I have 3 male and 2 female players.
Sexual Preferences of DM and Players: As far as I can tell, we're all straight.
Sex/Gender and Sexual Preferences of characters: My players have always played straight characters.
Level of Seriousness of Campaign (on a silly to serious sliding scale): Serious with some incidental comic relief, mostly coming from sarcastic PC comments.
Level of Grittiness of Campaign (on a happy sunshine to evil dark doom sliding scale): Closer to evil dark doom than to happy sunshine, but somewhere in the middle.
Amount of roleplaying vs. rollplaying of the Players and DM: More or less balanced. The characters are mostly well-RPed and created, but when we settle into combat we sometimes forget to RP at all.
Whether the Players or DM are in RL relationships: I'm single. One guy is taken and one girl is taken; neither relationships are with members of the group.


I've only ever run an attempt at romance in one campaign, and that player (female, straight, I believe she was about 15 at the time) no longer plays with us at the moment. I wasn't very good at it and the plan never really materialized as the love interest (a cleric of an evil religion) never reappeared. We ran out of time and failed to get to the part where he would return. You'll also have to admit that as a 20+ year old adult, RPing a character who is in love with a 15-year old's character is extremely uncomfortable. (Thankfully she also realized this difficulty.)

If the romance is between PC characters, then leave it to them, I suppose. If it's between a PC and an NPC, I'd say it's a good opportunity for plot hooks, but if overplayed it will become repetitive and boring for the players who aren't involved.

Thurbane
2010-02-17, 06:23 PM
Somehow I'm guessing that triggered a 100d6 damage roll to the ears with no saving throw... :smallsmile:
...more like Death Attack, but she studied me for a lot more than 3 rounds before making her Sneak Attack! :smallbiggrin:

It's always a difficult moment in my relationships when I tell them they figure out they're less important than gaming...
Ain't that the truth. :smallamused:

agumathebear
2010-02-17, 11:04 PM
in my campaign one of my players is my girlfriend, but i dont think our characters will ever become involved.

me, my girlfriend, and one of our players are college students, and the other two are highschool students, one homeschooled.

one of the players, the highschool student, has a love interest with one of his characters, not between the party, because the only girl is my gf lol! and the other college student has a love interest of his own character...

like...what i mean is, drakk is in love with trill, no one is playing trill, its just a npc, and ian is in love with...i forgot her name...anyway, but she's an npc too. get it?