Om nom nom hydraburger

[Studoku]

So what would a hydraburger taste like? I'm very tempted to say chicken.

[Mystic Muse]

It would taste Gouda.:smalltongue:

[Capt Spanner]

I imagine it would taste largely like most other lizard meat, which is kinda something between fish and chicken.

[Draconi Redfir]

dry beef with a mix of fish?

[Scoot]

Pond Water? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydra_(genus))

[Cisturn]

whatever it is i'm sure it's delicious to Goblins, and a whole bunch of other various types of monsters...or maybe it's just the Gouda

[Scarlet Knight]

For once I'd like to hear that something tasted like ham or veal. My guess is hydra tastes like gator.

[Warren Dew]

For once I'd like to hear that something tasted like ham or veal. My guess is hydra tastes like gator.

I'd guess so too. Alligator tastes like chicken, though.

The texture is more like beef.

[Starscream]

Alligator tastes like chicken, though.

Everything does if you're hungry enough.

It's only the heads that grow back, so that's what they are eating. So I imagine it's something like head cheese. I've never actually eaten head cheese (nor do I intend to), so I'll just assume that like everything else it is like chicken.

[Haven]

whatever it is i'm sure it's delicious to Goblins, and a whole bunch of other various types of monsters...or maybe it's just the Gouda

There seems to be a bit of a running gag about that (between this and the vampire panel here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0474.html), anyway, and probably somewhere else too). Is there something I'm missing about that particular cheese in relation to hobgoblins?

[krossbow]

Everything does if you're hungry enough.

It's only the heads that grow back, so that's what they are eating. So I imagine it's something like head cheese. I've never actually eaten head cheese (nor do I intend to), so I'll just assume that like everything else it is like chicken.


Neck too; i'd wager they chop it off near the body to harvest maximum neck meat.

[Thajocoth]

There seems to be a bit of a running gag about that (between this and the vampire panel here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0474.html), anyway, and probably somewhere else too). Is there something I'm missing about that particular cheese in relation to hobgoblins?

Everyone knows Goblins can't resist a fine Gouda! I think Elan said something like that once when they planned to impersonate cheese salesmen. Gouda enjoyed by goblins is a recurring theme, most certainly.

[Draconi Redfir]

didint goblins invent Guda? or was that something else?

[Herald Alberich]

didint goblins invent Guda? or was that something else?

If they didn't, I'm sure they claim they did. The other mentions of Gouda are here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0463.html) and here (on the left box) (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0514.html).

[Acero]

swordfish. It kinda makes sense

[Draconi Redfir]

If they didn't, I'm sure they claim they did. The other mentions of Gouda are here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0463.html) and here (on the left box) (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0514.html).


ahh ok, i must have been thinking of Guacamole.

[The Vorpal Tribble]

Actually, alligator DOES taste like chicken. I've had it a few times.

What's funny is apparently humans are similar pork. That's what I hear anyways.

[Zexion]

I bet that it tastes like some other fictitious animal... maybe sasquatch. And Sasquatch tastes like bear, and bear tastes like chicken. So yes, it tastes (vaguely) like chicken.

[ClockShock]

You know... when you get down to it none of those things really taste like chicken.
Chicken has it's own flavour...

I reckon Hydra could be quite rich for a meat.

[Watcher]

If they didn't, I'm sure they claim they did. The other mentions of Gouda are here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0463.html) and here (on the left box) (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0514.html).

And here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0474.html). ...

[RecklessFable]

I've always imagines Hydra skin as rubbery, which makes me think of calamari, but I've also not read the Monster Manual either.

[fishguy]

What's funny is apparently humans are similar pork. That's what I hear anyways.

Indeed, human meat is widely referred to as "long pig"

[Scarlet Knight]

Indeed, human meat is widely referred to as "long pig"

By who? :smallconfused:

I mean, I was called that in college but...:smallredface:

[fishguy]

By who? :smallconfused:

Webster's http://www.yourdictionary.com/long-pig

Iron Chef Parody http://www.dangerouslogic.com/battlelongpig.html

Dictionary dot com http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/long+pig

Long Pig the movie http://longpig.net/synopsis.php

Random blog http://nottotallyrad.blogspot.com/2009/09/smell-of-long-pig-in-morning.html

etc...

[Scarlet Knight]

Well, I'll be crossing Polynesia off my travel list...:smalleek:

[DrGonzo]

According to Idi Amin, human tastes a lot salter than leopard..

So now you know..

[Zexion]

Maybe it would taste like snake? They both have scales and long necks. The rest of the body is some sort of reptile, probably alligator.

[Draconi Redfir]

well not acounting for magical interfirence, the cells of a hydra would need to multiply fairly rapidly to regrow two heads in the place of one in a short time. this could probibly make the meat fairly tough, though im not sure. it also makes you wonder about how much food the hydra must eat in order to pack so much energy into its cells for such rapid division.

sorry.

<-- Biologist :P

[Raging Gene Ray]

well not acounting for magical interfirence, the cells of a hydra would need to multiply fairly rapidly to regrow two heads in the place of one in a short time. this could probibly make the meat fairly tough, though im not sure. it also makes you wonder about how much food the hydra must eat in order to pack so much energy into its cells for such rapid division.

Catgirl murderer! Hey, what would catgirl taste like?

[Bibliomancer]

well not acounting for magical interfirence, the cells of a hydra would need to multiply fairly rapidly to regrow two heads in the place of one in a short time. this could probibly make the meat fairly tough, though im not sure. it also makes you wonder about how much food the hydra must eat in order to pack so much energy into its cells for such rapid division.

sorry.

<-- Biologist :P

Ah, but technically, the new hands would consist of very young flesh that never had its muscles stimulated (since the base hydra is unconscious and cannot consciously flex its muscles. Thus, there's a good chance that the flesh is actually rather tender, like veal.

In terms of energy use, presumably the hydra is simply possesses a very efficient metabolism, allowing it to spend the energy necessary to regrow limbs (heads) in seconds (instead of weeks for Geckos regrowing tails). Since they seem to be apex predators, if they had a larger than necessary range since there is not much hydra vs. hydra competition (since many are killed by adventuring parties) they could easily eat enough energy between encounters to be able to regrow many heads. (The fact that there is no RAW limit, when there is probably a tacit biological one , is what Rich Burlew is making fun of here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0326.html), where the hydra burger first debuted.The store shown in the most recent comic is probably a franchise of Dan's.)


Catgirl murderer! Hey, what would catgirl taste like?

Probably fishy, with a trace of hairball.

[Draconi Redfir]

Ah, but technically, the new hands would consist of very young flesh that never had its muscles stimulated (since the base hydra is unconscious and cannot consciously flex its muscles. Thus, there's a good chance that the flesh is actually rather tender, like veal.

In terms of energy use, presumably the hydra is simply possesses a very efficient metabolism, allowing it to spend the energy necessary to regrow limbs (heads) in seconds (instead of weeks for Geckos regrowing tails). Since they seem to be apex predators, if they had a larger than necessary range since there is not much hydra vs. hydra competition (since many are killed by adventuring parties) they could easily eat enough energy between encounters to be able to regrow many heads. (The fact that there is no RAW limit, when there is probably a tacit biological one , is what Rich Burlew is making fun of here (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0326.html), where the hydra burger first debuted.The store shown in the most recent comic is probably a franchise of Dan's.)


makes sence. though if the hydra had managed to get away before passing out, its heart/blood suply would probibly increase to meet the demands of the newer heads.




Catgirl murderer! Hey, what would catgirl taste like?


1. i love catgirls. i would never hurt them!

2. how the heck am i a catgirl murderer?

3. hairy long pig.

[Hurkyl]

Suspension-of-disbelief-piercing logic is for catgirls like ringing bells and clapping hands are for faeries -- except exactly the opposite.

[Raging Gene Ray]

2. how the heck am i a catgirl murderer?

There's a meme on other parts of the forum that goes "everytime you introduce real-world logic and science into D and D, God kills a catgirl."

[Draconi Redfir]

There's a meme on other parts of the forum that goes "everytime you introduce real-world logic and science into D and D, God kills a catgirl."

...

...

...

OH SHARP!:smalleek:


edit: wait, thats not true! god only kills a catgirl when someone under 13 downloads X-rated matirial from the internet!

[Rotipher]

Must be why I haven't seen any catgirls around lately... ;-)

[rokar4life]

So what would a hydraburger taste like? I'm very tempted to say chicken.

Druid Filler

[EleventhHour]

Catgirl murderer! Hey, what would catgirl taste like?

I'm sure it's not very good. But human is delicious.

[rokar4life]

I'm sure it's not very good. But human is delicious.

I hear we're like pork. Cat is hard to describe, good with liberal application of hot sauce though. I bet catgirl'd be like pork more than cat.

[Raging Gene Ray]

edit: wait, thats not true! god only kills a catgirl when someone under 13 downloads X-rated matirial from the internet!

It's a moot point. Who are we to tell what God can kill and when?

[bdh5533]

hydra-head meat will revolutionize the oots world. soon there will be no hunger.

[waterpenguin43]

Maybe it has it's own taste? I'd imagine it as tough (If it has DR) and rubbery. It probably tastes a little like the meat of another reptile. (I haven't tried it, so I guess that's up to the others.)

[-Sentinel-]

Surely I'm not the only one who thinks that poor hydra's fate is horrible! Being kept alive for decades as a constant food provider is somewhat like falling into the Sarlacc's mouth... :smalleek: The hydra is unsconscious all this time, but still...

But, for the same amount of meat, maybe it's better to mistreat one hydra for decades than to kill dozens of them.




It's a moot point. Who are we to tell what God can kill and when?
Indeed! God kills anyone who claims to know who he kills and why.

...oh, crap.

[Sutremaine]

At least the hydra does appear to be unconscious whenever it's being chopped up. Can't imagine its life is much fun on the occasions it has to wake up and eat something, though.


Cat is hard to describe, good with liberal application of hot sauce though.
So cat meat is good with the liberal application of a condiment that drowns out the taste of whatever it's liberally applied to? :smallbiggrin:

[Optimystik]

So cat meat is good with the liberal application of a condiment that drowns out the taste of whatever it's liberally applied to? :smallbiggrin:

This is a fairly accurate description of hot sauce

[whitelaughter]

Given creatures such as the chimera can have the heads of differing species, it's possible that every head has a different taste. Or, by 'infecting' the stump with biological material from other creatures, you might be able to trick the hydra into growing new heads with the desired meat.


hydra-head meat will revolutionize the oots world. soon there will be no hunger.
No, as food still needs to be packed, shipped, handled, stored etc. Conisder also that real world we still have food shortages despite being technically able to feed everyone.

[Scarlet Knight]

This is a fairly accurate description of hot sauce

Reminds me of an old Dragon magazine article: "Magic for non-magic users".

Hot sauce can be substituted for a "Purefy Food" spell , since everyone knows you can eat ANYTHING if you put enough hot sauce on it. :smallwink:

[Draconi Redfir]

while not relaited to hydras at all, my Dm gave us an interessing concept dureing out last D&D game after we killed a pair of trolls.

Troll burger:

ask a troll to cut off some of its flesh foryou (the trol ldosent care, it will just grow back) and put the flesh into a small can sealed at both ends. wait for the meat in the can to grow, then take it out and make a hamburger out of it. eat the burger, and enjoy!

the troll meat inside your stomach will continue to grow for the rest of your life, being kept in check by the acids in your stomich. so so long as you never take an ant-acid, and dont mind giveing birth to a troll shortly after death, you will never need to eat again!

[2xMachina]

Hmm, I can't seem to recall the Hydra thing...

Can anyone link me to the page where the Goblin finds the hydra? And anything related if possible? (I only remember the recent case of Hydra burgers)

[The Succubus]

while not relaited to hydras at all, my Dm gave us an interessing concept dureing out last D&D game after we killed a pair of trolls.

Troll burger:

ask a troll to cut off some of its flesh foryou (the trol ldosent care, it will just grow back) and put the flesh into a small can sealed at both ends. wait for the meat in the can to grow, then take it out and make a hamburger out of it. eat the burger, and enjoy!

the troll meat inside your stomach will continue to grow for the rest of your life, being kept in check by the acids in your stomich. so so long as you never take an ant-acid, and dont mind giveing birth to a troll shortly after death, you will never need to eat again!

I think my appetite just took 10d12 worth of damage :smalleek:

[DeltaEmil]

Hmm, I can't seem to recall the Hydra thing...

Can anyone link me to the page where the Goblin finds the hydra? And anything related if possible? (I only remember the recent case of Hydra burgers)It's where the order of the stick goes to the valley of the oracle. Belkar makes the hydra lose consciousness because it grow so many heads that it didn't have enough blood for all of them.

[megabyter5]

Wouldn't cooking troll meat count as fire damage? As in, the kind of damage that bypasses troll regeneration?

Actually, doesn't acid damage do that too? Which being digested most likely causes?

[2xMachina]

It's where the order of the stick goes to the valley of the oracle. Belkar makes the hydra lose consciousness because it grow so many heads that it didn't have enough blood for all of them.

Ah, that. I don't remember the goblin thing though.

[sihnfahl]

Ah, that. I don't remember the goblin thing though.
Goblin Dan's All-U-Can-Eat Hydra Head BBQ Hut (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0326.html)

[Scarlet Knight]

Troll burger:

ask a troll to cut off some of its flesh foryou (the trol ldosent care, it will just grow back) and put the flesh into a small can sealed at both ends. wait for the meat in the can to grow, then take it out and make a hamburger out of it. eat the burger, and enjoy!

the troll meat inside your stomach will continue to grow for the rest of your life, being kept in check by the acids in your stomich. so so long as you never take an ant-acid, and dont mind giveing birth to a troll shortly after death, you will never need to eat again!

Well, THAT explains the low cafeteria costs back in college...

[Draconi Redfir]

Wouldn't cooking troll meat count as fire damage? As in, the kind of damage that bypasses troll regeneration?

Actually, doesn't acid damage do that too? Which being digested most likely causes?

you dont cook it.

im not sure about the stomich acid thing myself, my guess is that that the acid just slows it down a bit, not stopping it compleately.

[Herald Alberich]

The active agent in gastric acid is hydrochloric acid, and it's hard to find anything much stronger. pH 1 - 2. If acid damage prevents troll regeneration (yes (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0507.html)), stomach acid will do the job.

Anyway, even if it did work, you might need to eat less, but troll meat's not going to give you all the nutrients you require. You'd have to maintain a vegetarian diet at least.