I don't know how I should feel

[Dusk Eclipse]

I don't how I should feel, my best friend and his girlfriend entered to a contests for scholarships out of the country (United world college or something like that).
The thing is that only my friend got to the final phase of the contest and his girlfriend didn't, I am happy for my friend but at the same time I feel a knot on my stomach for his girlfreind (who also happens to be one of my dearest friends).

His girlfriend probably doesn't know the result yet so I am not sure how she will react when se knows. Also my friend is quite distressed, by his body language I know he is happy but his face is in quite a distress, he is even more distracted than usual (VERY DIFFICULT)

And to complicate things more, I kinda don't want for my friend to leave, I know it is selfish, but I will miss him very much. He has been my best friend since secondary school, he presented me the girl I am currently dating, he even introduced me to D&D.

So what should I feel? happy? torn? depressed?

Any advice, comments, etc?

[denthor]

Happy for your male friend he is enbarking on a new life.

Your female friend should remain a friend and get on with her life.

You are at an age where things change, even if you all went to the same college there is nothing that says you will remain close friends.

All three of you would chose different groups to associate with. Be thankful that you had a two very close friends and keep in touch even if it is by phone once every five years.

I am forty now I see none of my friends from elementry middle or high school nor do I want to we grew into separate adults married, divorced traveled the world.

I stayed where I was at and found other things to occupy my mind and never missed them after a while.

This is all part of growing up. Just the next phase.

[Ormagoden]

Change is a natural part of life Dusk.
People move on friends come and go, it's all natural.
Be happy your friend has an awesome opportunity on his doorstep.
Besides if he is your best bud distance won't have a real factor in your friendship (except for the amount of time you see each other)

[Dusk Eclipse]

Yes I understand that change is part, the thing is that it doesn't make things easier.

[valadil]

Yes I understand that change is part, the thing is that it doesn't make things easier.

It sucks now but when you actually get on with the new semester it will be easier even if you and your friend are apart. You'll meet exciting new people and so will he. And you'll get to share it all over the wonder that is facebook. I'm only being half sarcastic about that. It's remarkably easy to stay in touch these days.

[Thajocoth]

What you should feel? I'd think you'd feel lots of different and conflicting things, as it's a complicated situation and emotions are neither exclusive nor logical.

You can always keep in touch online.

[MethosH]

That doesn't need to be such a big deal.
I moved to go to college while my girlfriend stayed here. We are together for 4 years now.
Even my parents faced a similar situation when my father went to finish his PhD in another country.

[Manga Shoggoth]

All of them, as appropriate.

Celebrate with your friend, comiserate with his girlfriend. Be sad that you will be splitting up even if it is only for a short while. Look forward to the new things that will be coming, and remember that when you are all together again you will have new things to share.

But don't try and mix things up and don't try to force yourself into inappropriate feelings, just because you think you should feel in a certian way.

[Dr. Bath]

Blinded with incandescent rage.

By which I mean, happy tinged with sad. Just try and keep in touch. Be there for his girlfriend if she needs it.

[SoD]

Happy for his sake, but sorry for yours.

[Devils_Advocate]

So what should I feel?
"Should"? "Should"?! Screw "should". (http://imago.hitherby.com/?p=81) Screw it hard.

How do you want to feel?

[Zeb The Troll]

You are at an age where things change, even if you all went to the same college there is nothing that says you will remain close friends.

All three of you would chose different groups to associate with. Be thankful that you had a two very close friends and keep in touch even if it is by phone once every five years.

I am forty now I see none of my friends from elementry middle or high school nor do I want to we grew into separate adults married, divorced traveled the world.

I stayed where I was at and found other things to occupy my mind and never missed them after a while.

This is all part of growing up. Just the next phase.This varies greatly from person to person. I can't even name more than three people I went to high school with 20+ years ago, and I'm not close with any of them. Alarra at least knows their names and is friends with many of them on Facebook. My mother-in-law, on the other hand, is still very close friends with people she befriended in grade school more than 40 years ago.

[thubby]

you should feel how you do feel. kinda sucks but that's the long and short of it.

friendships are not predictable in the long term. I'm still very close to a friend from middle school and she moved 3 states over!