Most ridiculous character concept ideas

[gallagher]

The object of this conversation? what is the most ridiculous character concept ideas that you (or your friends/adventure-mates/hated rivals) have come up with?

one of my favorites was a dnd 3.5 game, where we came up with the idea of a bard that inspires courage and whatnot with a perform(mime) check.

just imagine: I see your miming, and i am inspired to hit someone harder.

actually, i guess that makes a bit of sense, as i am inspired to do the same thing when i see a mime. though my target would tend to be the mime.

another of my favorites was a vow of peace barbarian, who only dealt nonlethal damage. the DM for the game that i WOULD have played this character in said that the aura that calmed emotions would affect me, as well, and therefor couldnt go into a rage. i guess that makes a little sense, and i dont think you can deal nonlethal damage with a giant ax while raging. if was a fun idea though.

anyway, what are some of your favorites?

[Godskook]

another of my favorites was a vow of peace barbarian, who only dealt nonlethal damage. the DM for the game that i WOULD have played this character in said that the aura that calmed emotions would affect me, as well, and therefor couldnt go into a rage. i guess that makes a little sense, and i dont think you can deal nonlethal damage with a giant ax while raging. if was a fun idea though.

Merciful weapons.


One character of mine that never saw play was utterly convinced that he was reading a holy text correctly, and thus devoted himself wholly to the cause of the Lolcat Bible. It'd be complete with quotes and everything, and the tome would turn out to be a Heironeous text read upside down. He even had Lolcat as one of his 'languages' that he could speak.

[Ryumaru]

Mine was the fishmalk (I was young >.<) in Masquerade; his obsession and demention being that he believed cabbages were truely the illuminati of the world, and held all the power.

Throw in True Faith.

Vampires because to crap themselves when the nutjob telling them to 'Eat their greens!' shoved a holy cabbage into their mouths, and watched them burn from the inside out.

[Sinfire Titan]

Two words: Sandwich Psion.


I've had a player approach me and ask if he could play a living axe. I showed him this trick, and he used it IC to turn himself into a sentient axe that could manifest powers.

He later repeated the same trick after discovering the "Living in a Flying Box" thread. That was one hell of a campaign...

[Mongoose87]

I've got an idea for a halfling who thinks he's the Phantom of the Opera.

[gallagher]

Two words: Sandwich Psion.


I've had a player approach me and ask if he could play a living axe. I showed him this trick, and he used it IC to turn himself into a sentient axe that could manifest powers.

He later repeated the same trick after discovering the "Living in a Flying Box" thread. That was one hell of a campaign...

i am sorry, but i am unfamiliar with this idea. how would one become a sentient weapon? not that i am planning on doing this immediately, but i think i want to remember this, as some DMs like having their worlds have the same characters be heroes that are worshipped or remembered later... so if my character were to become a sentient weapon and were to be found or quested for in a different game... well i just happen to think that the idea is absolutely delightful :smallbiggrin:

[Beowulf DW]

In the only campaign I've played, we had a cleric who had been raised by communist Catholic Codfish and rode around on an oar.

Edit: Didn't use the idea, but I once thought of making a halfling monk who enjoyed jumpkicking people in the face.

[jiriku]

Pika, another playgrounder, used to start posts talking about a player of his who was playing a candy squirrel barbarian (anthromorphic squirrel with the candy template...taste the rainbow, b****!). Being menaced by a foot-tall rainbow-colored squirrel with a battleaxe and a bad attitude takes the cake for me.

[Sinfire Titan]

i am sorry, but i am unfamiliar with this idea. how would one become a sentient weapon? not that i am planning on doing this immediately, but i think i want to remember this, as some DMs like having their worlds have the same characters be heroes that are worshipped or remembered later... so if my character were to become a sentient weapon and were to be found or quested for in a different game... well i just happen to think that the idea is absolutely delightful :smallbiggrin:

It involves a complex use of the Mindswitch, True psionic power. Here's the closest thing to the original that I can find (http://74.125.47.132/search?q=cache:7YvU4_QoKSQJ:community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75882/19857754/Living_in_a_Flying_Box+Living+in+a+Flying+Box&cd=5&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us) (same trick, different object, much more optimization involved).


Pika, another playgrounder, used to start posts talking about a player of his who was playing a candy squirrel barbarian (anthromorphic squirrel with the candy template...taste the rainbow, b****!). Being menaced by a foot-tall rainbow-colored squirrel with a battleaxe and a bad attitude takes the cake for me.

That was in poor taste, and wasn't very punny.

[Swordgleam]

We kept trying to convince our one UU player to be a UU cleric. "I smite you in the name of whatever deity you worship if you so happen to worship one and believe it capable of smiting unless that idea offends you!" "Back, foul demon! The power of my god or possibly gods or maybe divine force protects me from your ilk, unless of course you have an objection to that!"

The only reason it didn't happen is because the campaign is rather dark in tone, and it wouldn't fit. So instead, he's playing a bard.

[Ernir]

Toad Psion, masquerading as a familiar. Disguise completed by dressing the party Barbarian in Wizard's robes, and sitting on his shoulder all the time.

Bard with Perform: Silly Walks.

Orc Wizard who participates in combat by bashing people with his 50-pound, iron-bound spellbook.

Diviner Wizard who is cursed with the knowledge that he's a fictional character whose fate is decided by the whims of cruel godlike creatures and some kind of polyhedron. Naturally, no one believes him, and he's massively depressed.

[AtwasAwamps]

We kept trying to convince our one UU player to be a UU cleric. "I smite you in the name of whatever deity you worship if you so happen to worship one and believe it capable of smiting unless that idea offends you!" "Back, foul demon! The power of my god or possibly gods or maybe divine force protects me from your ilk, unless of course you have an objection to that!"

The only reason it didn't happen is because the campaign is rather dark in tone, and it wouldn't fit. So instead, he's playing a bard.

UU? What be that?

...now I want to play a wizard based on Archchancellor Ridcully...

[Rauthiss]

We kept trying to convince our one UU player to be a UU cleric. "I smite you in the name of whatever deity you worship if you so happen to worship one and believe it capable of smiting unless that idea offends you!" "Back, foul demon! The power of my god or possibly gods or maybe divine force protects me from your ilk, unless of course you have an objection to that!" As a UU, I can say that this is hilarious. Now you just have to remember the god of the coffee and committees. :p

EDIT: @Atwasawamps - Unitarian Universalist - wikipedia or google it. :3

[gallagher]

Toad Psion, masquerading as a familiar. Disguise completed by dressing the party Barbarian in Wizard's robes, and sitting on his shoulder all the time.

Bard with Perform: Silly Walks.

Orc Wizard who participates in combat by bashing people with his 50-pound, iron-bound spellbook.

Diviner Wizard who is cursed with the knowledge that he's a fictional character whose fate is decided by the whims of cruel godlike creatures and some kind of polyhedron. Naturally, no one believes him, and he's massively depressed.

i seriously lol'd right there, and almost fell out of my chair. well played

[oxybe]

about a month ago i retired a PC based around the very base idea of your stereotypical D&D adventurer: D&D characters are the most heavily armed hobos in the world. and thus "Shump, the magical vagrant" was created. he had nothing but a rusty shiv, an old stick, a bindle, a blast of pure unfiltered magic & more hate for the lower-middle class then anything you could believe.

he retired both filthy & filthy rich on his own island, a personal villa, his own library, a research lab, as head of a cult and had a lich who used to be a consultant for a demon lord as his greatest ally (whom he helped smuggle into the material plane) as "Shump, the hoboverlord".

this april we're starting our next campaign. my character is a half-orc wizard/cowboy/engineer/chemist/merchant that shoots his magics out of a wheel-lock pistol.

[Dogmantra]

My favourite is the result of a mad gnome's experiments. He's a half-orc who developed psionic powers as the result of these experiments, but the side effects include believing that he's just the reincarnation of an elven war veteran who fought in a non-existant war with the dwarves.

[JeenLeen]

I haven't played it, but while considering a Vampire: The Masquerade character, I thought of a Malkavian whose insanity is that he thinks he is a Kender from D&D.

A very tall and strong Malk, who thinks he is a 3.5 or 4 ft. tall halfling, and has the ownership-views of the Kender as well.

[Amphetryon]

One of my players is bound and determined to be an Undead Robot Ninja Pirate on a Dinosaur, ever since I showed her it was possible.

[Frosty]

One of my players is bound and determined to be an Undead Robot Ninja Pirate on a Dinosaur, ever since I showed her it was possible.

Does it involve Necropolitan Warforged taking Dread Pirate and Ninja levels and getting the Wild Cohort feat?

[Amphetryon]

Does it involve Necropolitan Warforged taking Dread Pirate and Ninja levels and getting the Wild Cohort feat?

Necropolitan Warforged Scout Warblade/Ranger/Shadow Sun Ninja/Scarlet Corsair/something is her 'plan'. Campaign is restricted to books we actually have in hard copy, and no online material.

[Octopus Jack]

My fickle cleric of luck, every single feat he took was a luck feat and could pretty much reroll everything, that was the part people liked.
When he changed sides because of how well people/monsters were rolling or because it was an unfair fight and "luck is always fair" or because he could was the part people hated about him, they hated him alot

[Choco]

Warforged bard, covered in speakers, with max ranks in Perform(Sing). His normal voice is that of Stephen Hawking and does not use the speakers. Then he "sings" by blaring hardcore brain-scrambling j-pop from his speakers. "Inspires" the party to suicidal heroic (same difference really) acts just so they finish the combat faster to get him to stop "singing", while he is headbobbing and enjoying it the whole time.

[Starscream]

A gestalt monk/rogue based on silent comedians, named Keaton. He never wanted to hurt anyone, but somehow simply tripping over his own feet on the battlefield always resulted in him being surrounded by unconscious enemies.

The DM found this concept amusing, and ruled that if I could find logical enough Rube-Goldbergesque ways for this to happen when I rolled an attack, the opponent would automatically be denied their dex bonus (and thus my character would have accidentally sneak attacked them).

It made sense, really. You'd never in a million years expect something like that to happen, so there's no way you could be prepared for it.

So an ogre would order that we surrender, my character would immediately put his hands up, the dagger he was holding would accidentally sever the rope holding a chandelier, it would fall on a table behind the ogre, launch a plate into the air, the plate would hit the very surprised ogre in the back of the head, he would stumble forward and impale himself on my outstretched dagger. Sneak Attack!

[gallagher]

A gestalt monk/rogue based on silent comedians, named Keaton. He never wanted to hurt anyone, but somehow simply tripping over his own feet on the battlefield always resulted in him being surrounded by unconscious enemies.

The DM found this concept amusing, and ruled that if I could find logical enough Rube-Goldbergesque ways for this to happen when I rolled an attack, the opponent would automatically be denied their dex bonus (and thus my character would have accidentally sneak attacked them).

It made sense, really. You'd never in a million years expect something like that to happen, so there's no way you could be prepared for it.

So an ogre would order that we surrender, my character would immediately put his hands up, the dagger he was holding would accidentally sever the rope holding a chandelier, it would fall on a table behind the ogre, launch a plate into the air, the plate would hit the very surprised ogre in the back of the head, he would stumble forward and impale himself on my outstretched dagger. Sneak Attack!
you would probably get better damage if the chandelier hit the ogre, plus sneak attack, and since i watch scooby doo, we all know that whenever a chandelier lands on someone they are instantly grappled/bound, but can run to chase you. then cue 1950s groove music chase scene montage.

[oxybe]

you would probably get better damage if the chandelier hit the ogre, plus sneak attack, and since i watch scooby doo, we all know that whenever a chandelier lands on someone they are instantly grappled/bound, but can run to chase you. then cue 1950s groove music chase scene montage.

*groovy 50's tune*

Keaton, Keaton,
what you gonna do?
You angered an ogre,
now he's chasing after you!

Hurry, hurry,
you better run real fast!
'cause that big ol' ogre's
gonna beat your sorry ass!

[juggalotis]

my personal favorite was a gnome rogue i made. his name was gibbersnib. he wore cloth armor dressed like a jester and his only weapon was a rapier he called "ticklestick" that had the horrible laughter (cant remember spells exact name) spell enchanted onto it.

[randomhero00]

One of mine, that I'm currently trying to play is to play a psion or erudite with psicrystal. Grab leader ship. And polymorph everyone :) I, the master of the two, would be the psicrystal. The psicrystal would look my cohort. Using telepathy I'd tell my psicrystal-cohort what I want spoken. He'd then pretend to lean over the real cohort, who looks like me, and telepathy it to him. Who would finally speak it out loud. All sorts of funnyness :D Especially when I make them bow to me and pay me respect, as it'd look like a master psion and his cohort worshipping a psicrystal.

[JaronK]

I had a diplomancer character who did in fact use Perform (Mime) along with Exemplar. If you got too close to him and saw him not move you instantly became his faithful follower.

JaronK

[gallagher]

my personal favorite was a gnome rogue i made. his name was gibbersnib. he wore cloth armor dressed like a jester and his only weapon was a rapier he called "ticklestick" that had the horrible laughter (cant remember spells exact name) spell enchanted onto it.
tashas hideous laugh?

[Starscream]

you would probably get better damage if the chandelier hit the ogre, plus sneak attack, and since i watch scooby doo, we all know that whenever a chandelier lands on someone they are instantly grappled/bound, but can run to chase you. then cue 1950s groove music chase scene montage.

Yeah, but simple "Rope cut, chandelier hits ogre" wouldn't be amusing enough. Basically my character ran on Rule of Funny. As long as he could keep the DM entertained with his antics, he could get away with them.

Also, I don't know how to roll an attack roll with a chandelier. The way I was doing it, the crunch was still a simple dagger attack, with weapon finesse and everything. The in-game "this is an accident" aspect of the move was just for fluff, and making the ogre lose his dex bonus was the only effect it had on actual gameplay.

[gallagher]

Yeah, but simple "Rope cut, chandelier hits ogre" wouldn't be amusing enough. Basically my character ran on Rule of Funny. As long as he could keep the DM entertained with his antics, he could get away with them.

Also, I don't know how to roll an attack roll with a chandelier. The way I was doing it, the crunch was still a simple dagger attack, with weapon finesse and everything. The in-game "this is an accident" aspect of the move was just for fluff, and making the ogre lose his dex bonus was the only effect it had on actual gameplay.

i dont see how a dm cant be amused with a chase scene followed by various doors being opened with you, the bad guy, and the three stooges coming out of different ones and colliding in the middle. at least once anyway

[Starscream]

i dont see how a dm cant be amused with a chase scene followed by various doors being opened with you, the bad guy, and the three stooges coming out of different ones and colliding in the middle. at least once anyway

Fine if every character is going to be silly. Mine was the only one in a more or less ordinary party, so I couldn't re-write the laws of the universe in the name of slapstick.

Of course, if everyone is going to act that way, it's time to put away the D&D books and just play Toon.:smallbiggrin:

[gallagher]

Fine if every character is going to be silly. Mine was the only one in a more or less ordinary party, so I couldn't re-write the laws of the universe in the name of slapstick.

Of course, if everyone is going to act that way, it's time to put away the D&D books and just play Toon.:smallbiggrin:
i'm just saying, nobody can be entirely serious all the time, and having one silly character inspires silliness amongst the other players.

they just not want to be "that guy" who reenacts what they saw on TV, especially considering that that tv show is a classic and everyone and their mother watched at least one episode.

[Biffoniacus_Furiou]

I've been wanting to play an Awakened Dandelion Psion since 3.0, but it's yet to happen.

Then there's the Fiend of Possession, probably with levels in Psion and/or Warlock, with Leadership or Thralherd. His cohort is a buff combat character, probably a Warblade or Crusader, and the FoP continually gives him a +4 Profane bonus to all his stats and buffs him with personal-range powers and invocations. The FoP can cast in the same round as the cohort full attacks, so it would appear as though he's taking two sets of actions. If the cohort dies you just recruit a new one, and the FoP is almost impossible to harm for his adventuring career.

[Swordgleam]

As a UU, I can say that this is hilarious. Now you just have to remember the god of the coffee and committees. :p

EDIT: @Atwasawamps - Unitarian Universalist - wikipedia or google it. :3

The coffee is free... the first time.

We also considered a UU martial art. Instead of using strikes or throws, you'd say things like, "Why do you punch that way? Have you always punched that way? Is it because your parents taught you to punch like that? Have you ever considered changing the way you punch? Other styles of punching are perfectly valid, you know." Now that I think about it, maybe a UU bard could do that?

[Bonecrusher Doc]

Diviner Wizard who is cursed with the knowledge that he's a fictional character whose fate is decided by the whims of cruel godlike creatures and some kind of polyhedron. Naturally, no one believes him, and he's massively depressed.

This sounds like it was a hilarious game. :smallbiggrin:

[Starscream]

Diviner Wizard who is cursed with the knowledge that he's a fictional character whose fate is decided by the whims of cruel godlike creatures and some kind of polyhedron. Naturally, no one believes him, and he's massively depressed.

The spoof supplement "Portable Hole Full of Beer" has a prestige class that causes the character to slowly become aware of their fictionality.

For the capstone they become a real person and move in with the player.:smallbiggrin:

[senrath]

The spoof supplement "Portable Hole Full of Beer" has a prestige class that causes the character to slowly become aware of their fictionality.

For the capstone they become a real person and move in with the player.:smallbiggrin:

Huh. One of my friends has that book. I'll have to look into borrowing it.

Anyway, one of my characters was a Favored Soul of Norebo who decided everything by dice-roll. And it wasn't just that I would roll dice, but the character would be rolling the dice as well.

[Bonecrusher Doc]

For the capstone they become a real person and move in with the player.:smallbiggrin:

If I knew that was going to happen I would put a LOT of thought into character creation. But that's a topic for a whole other thread.

[Mystic Muse]

A guy that attacks using only Marshmallows.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

Oh, I've had lots of weird PCs.

I've had two players be creature exemplars--a draconic dragonborn half-dragon (x4) dragonwraught kobold dragon shaman 1/dragonfire adept 1/dragonfire inspiration bard 1/... and so forth, and a werebear anthropomorphic polar bear barbarian X/bear totem Y/... and so forth.

I've had one maul ("Not a mace, thankyouverymuch!") who was pretty much every advanced item you can be (weapon of legacy, intelligent item, item familiar, etc.) being wielded by another PC. He knew every single language and had major image at will at a ridiculous DC, and an ego score in the 90s, so his favorite strategy was to roll d% and on particular numbers do crazy things--for instace, 37 was "take over wielder, strike impressive pose, yell 'I am the summoner of the GREAT RED DRAGON!!!!', create major image of red dragon, laugh." I remember that number because it came up a lot....

I've had one player basically play the Scarecrow (from Batman)...but he was Exalted good and used butterflies in all of his spells. Yeah. Trust me, if you saw her in play you'd immediately think Scarecrow from the modus operandi.

[DementedFellow]

I had a dwarf fighter character who had every bonus feat as endurance. He could only speak two words. "Auch! Indignation!" In retrospect, he behaved much more like a barbarian than a fighter.

Then I played a Treant character who was somewhat short-tempered and with 3.0 rules cleared out a room full of baddies in one round because of the right feat selection. His name was Ol' Greg. He would scream his name as a battle cry. In an odd way, it made perfect sense and stands of the best RP experiences I've ever done as everything he said and did was totally in character.

[Danin]

Bluphhlbulbuplbbu - Psionic Warrior Gelatinous Cube. Had the feats speed of thought and up the walls and the expansion power. He would slide up dungeon walls, expand, then drop on them to instantly engulf them. Took vow of poverty. Traveled town to town preaching the evils of material wealth. Talked by playing the vocal chords of the people he was digesting. Took no prisoners, only meals.

[Farlion]

Here an funny concept me and two friends came up with one late night.

Kawumbadix Cuddlebeard,

A duergar grappler monk who walks around in his underwear, while the rest of his body is fully coated in contact poison.

He would have to use his special bodylotion every now and then, but noone ever managed to play him, yet ;-P

Cheers,
Farlion

[AslanCross]

Someone once posted about a warforged who thought he was a gnome in a power suit.

[Corey]

We kept trying to convince our one UU player to be a UU cleric. "I smite you in the name of whatever deity you worship if you so happen to worship one and believe it capable of smiting unless that idea offends you!" "Back, foul demon! The power of my god or possibly gods or maybe divine force protects me from your ilk, unless of course you have an objection to that!"

:smallbiggrin:

You've got to work in

Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that you be forgiven for anything you may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness. Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to insure any possible benefit for which you may be eligible after the destruction of your body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be, in such a manner as to insure your receiving said benefit. I ask this in my capacity as your elected intermediary between yourself and that which may not be yourself, but which may have an interest in the matter of your receiving as much as it is possible for you to receive of this thing, and which may in some way be influenced by this ceremony. Amen.

http://www.gregroelofs.com/humor/zelazny_agnostic.html

A reference to that in a Larry Niven story turned me on to Roger Zelazny.

[Corey]

I once had a small talking dinosaur animal companion, called a Thesaurus, nicknamed Sorry.

Whatever I said, he'd reiterate in multiple synonyms.

[Indon]

I played an Orcish Fighter who used a quarterstaff and was developing a signature combat style. Said signature style consisted of swinging wildly in the hopes of hitting. Was about as combat-capable as the rest of the party. Sadly, the group wiped shortly after a lucky critical hit instadropped me - ironic, considering that fishing for crits (which were houseruled to be better than normal) was the point of the character.

The most memorably ridiculous character concept I ever had was probably one I'd made for a 50HD epic fighter NPC who took nothing but Toughness (well, Azure Toughness, because you can get more HP from it that way) and Epic Toughness as his feats. He was a bounty hunter who used a merciful whip and longbow to subdue his targets, which he pursued with relentless determination. I called him Harrison Norris.

[Kris Strife]

Paladin/Grayguard with armor shaped like Shining/Burning Gundam, that frequently uses his Lay on Hands ability to deal damage, complete with quotes from the show.

Edit: And Yes, his holy symbol would be tattoed to the back of his hand. :smallamused:

[subject42]

The most memorably ridiculous character concept I ever had was probably one I'd made for a 50HD epic fighter NPC who took nothing but Toughness (well, Azure Toughness, because you can get more HP from it that way) and Epic Toughness as his feats. He was a bounty hunter who used a merciful whip and longbow to subdue his targets, which he pursued with relentless determination. I called him Harrison Norris.

I know a guy who played in an epic campaign as a level 30-something commoner. His entire feat tree consisted of the various toughness feats. His only item was a highly enchanted adamantine rake and some enchanted clothing. He had something like 1000 hit points.


His title? "The Best Farmer In The World".

[adecoy95]

i played a character for about half a game session that failed only part of the baleful polymorph spell, i cant remember what i was turned into tho

[Guy-Nightbeast]

Simply put, Roy "The slightly insane" Roberts

A swashbuckler/dread pirate with preform ranks in

Preform (Things)
Preform (Stuff)
Preform (junk)

So basically, we were never quite sure what he did, but he did it well. At times he would randomly check for gnomes that pass by and juggle them....

Also, when inquired "Why is it slightly insane" or some other variation on that theme, he'd reply "It makes them ask questions...*Shiftyeyes*"

[Math_Mage]

:smallbiggrin:

You've got to work in

Insofar as I may be heard by anything, which may or may not care what I say, I ask, if it matters, that you be forgiven for anything you may have done or failed to do which requires forgiveness. Conversely, if not forgiveness but something else may be required to insure any possible benefit for which you may be eligible after the destruction of your body, I ask that this, whatever it may be, be granted or withheld, as the case may be, in such a manner as to insure your receiving said benefit. I ask this in my capacity as your elected intermediary between yourself and that which may not be yourself, but which may have an interest in the matter of your receiving as much as it is possible for you to receive of this thing, and which may in some way be influenced by this ceremony. Amen.

http://www.gregroelofs.com/humor/zelazny_agnostic.html

A reference to that in a Larry Niven story turned me on to Roger Zelazny.

Which Niven story?

[Ranzunar]

I once insisted that we rolled our stats rather than use point buy as we normally do with my party. I ended up rolling a 5 and decided that if I was going to suck at something I would do it to the most horrible extent of the rules. So I played a dwarf rogue with 3 charisma called Fugly Mirrorbreaker. It made sense that I maxed out hide and became a sniper style crossbow shooter. Most epic thing ever was when during the last game the group convinced me to make a gather info check, with no ranks, synergies, and abysmal cha. I rolled a two, which gave a negative total. I ended asking the biggest and scariest dude in the place, a storm giant, in a manner that would make Steve Urkel look charming by comparison. Because of this character, to this day I will avoid situations by the famous catchphrase, "Fugly not get involved in this one" and proceed to make the equivalent of a hide check.

[Xallace]

For those not in the know, Iborighu is an evil deity of cold and winter, whose goal is to envelop the world entirely in snow. As you might imagine, he doesn't have many followers. Well, as a Favored of Iborighu, I hatched a cunning plan. I would go to playgrounds, carnivals, and pretty much anywhere else that attracted young children.

"Hey kids, don't ya' hate homework?"
"Yeah!"
"Don't you wish you didn't have to do homework, that you could stay outside and play all day?"
"YEAH!"
"Wouldn't it be awesome if you could just not go to school at all?"
"YEAH!"
"You know what gets you out of school?"
"What?"
"Snow days."

So many converts.

[Greenish]

For those not in the know, Iborighu is an evil deity of cold and winter, whose goal is to envelop the world entirely in snow. As you might imagine, he doesn't have many followers. Well, as a Favored of Iborighu, I hatched a cunning plan. I would go to playgrounds, carnivals, and pretty much anywhere else that attracted young children.

"Hey kids, don't ya' hate homework?"
"Yeah!"
"Don't you wish you didn't have to do homework, that you could stay outside and play all day?"
"YEAH!"
"Wouldn't it be awesome if you could just not go to school at all?"
"YEAH!"
"You know what gets you out of school?"
"What?"
"Snow days."

So many converts.:biggrin: :biggrin: :biggrin:

[PairO'Dice Lost]

For those not in the know, Iborighu is an evil deity of cold and winter, whose goal is to envelop the world entirely in snow. As you might imagine, he doesn't have many followers. Well, as a Favored of Iborighu, I hatched a cunning plan. I would go to playgrounds, carnivals, and pretty much anywhere else that attracted young children.

"Hey kids, don't ya' hate homework?"
"Yeah!"
"Don't you wish you didn't have to do homework, that you could stay outside and play all day?"
"YEAH!"
"Wouldn't it be awesome if you could just not go to school at all?"
"YEAH!"
"You know what gets you out of school?"
"What?"
"Snow days."

So many converts.

...you are my hero.

[Ishcumbeebeeda]

I once had a small talking dinosaur animal companion, called a Thesaurus, nicknamed Sorry.

Whatever I said, he'd reiterate in multiple synonyms.

LOL, awesome! I think I might get kicked out of the library cuz I just laughed so hard at that. (Incidentally I'm only a semester or two away from my BA in English, so I appreciate puns much more than your average person :smallbiggrin:)

[Ishcumbeebeeda]

I was thumbing through some books once and came across a couple of templates; one for up to four extra arms and one for an extra head. Eventually I came up with a concept for a two headed, six armed Goliath. It gets better though, I thought it would be awesome if one head was always asleep while the other was awake, and give each head a different class and alignment. I was thinking of making one head a Paladin (or something similar) of Pelor who tried to convert and/or heal everyone he met and the other head a NE rogue who particularly enjoyed disemboweling anyone who even vaguely annoyed him. Also, each head is under the impression that the other is a vestigial twin who died before birth. Haven't gotten to play this concept yet, mores the pity. :smallsigh:

[Swordgleam]

I was thinking of making one head a Paladin (or something similar) of Pelor who tried to convert and/or heal everyone he met and the other head a NE rogue who particularly enjoyed disemboweling anyone who even vaguely annoyed him.

We have a character kind of like that in our group - a (sorta) NG wizard who was killed and had his soul trapped in the body of his twin brother, an evil Paladin of Torog. Only one controls the body at the time, and until recently, the paladin had no idea the wizard was around - he assumed he just blacked out and did Torog-y things during those times.

We've encountered two big problems with it. One, the two classes have vastly different armor proficiency. Two, the entire rest of the party wants to kill them both.

[Vitruviansquid]

The day I realized the physical dimensions of a character need not correlate to their stats... that was a good day.

That and the time I sat down and tried to incorporate as much cultural stereotype into a single character as I can possibly fit. That was also a good day.

[Mauther]

My personal shame was a low level sorcerer who was convinced his pet ferret was really a familiar and could talk to him (this upset his toad familiar who he left at home), and followed its instructions faithfully. As my character was the party leader, that really meant the party was being lead by my imaginary familiar. The DM decided that the imaginary ferret wore a black beret, had a Che Guevara beard, and constantly railed about dwarven neo-colonialism, gnomish monopolistic capitalism, and the necessity of a human led world revolution to insure the rights of the landed poor. It quickly devolved into farce.

Introduced a cursed intelligent weapon named Buckley. It was relatively powerful and had some decent special abilities, but had been lost in combat so many time that when drawn began to relate all the ways things could possibly go wrong, creating moral penalties to attacks, saves, damage, skill checks the works. So the party bard had to countersong by reassuring the weapon: “Your wearing metal armor and it breathes fire, you’ll cook like a goose.”
“No, he’s got protection from fire”
“Well, the caster levels too low to be effective, plus its got reach and strength- its gonna wipe the floor with us before killing everyone else”

Nobody like Buckley.

[Swordgleam]

Introduced a cursed intelligent weapon named Buckley. It was relatively powerful and had some decent special abilities, but had been lost in combat so many time that when drawn began to relate all the ways things could possibly go wrong

I see what you did there. John Ringo fan? :smalltongue:

[Volkov]

An Awakened T-rex Archmage. Go ahead, laugh.

[flabort]

Ha ah hah ah ha ha ha heh ha ha har, ha, ha... hah? Aaaaaaaaaaaaah! MOMMY! MOMMY!

[Soranar]

Favorite weird character was Gorn, a Half-Ogre Bard/Hulking hurler

Thing is it's hard to keep enough ammunition around for a hulking hurler, so I started using the bard cantrip summon instrument (must be capable of wielding it in 2 hands, which is still kinda big for a half-ogre)

My favorite to throw was a piano (human sized) , weights from 500-1300 pounds depending on the type so the ammunition's weight could be scaled by level. Which was quite useful.

Said half-ogre had a hatred of pianos because his fingers couldn't play them (kept hitting several keys at a time) so he would sing all day about his woes and send them crashing on his opponents.

There's also something oddly satisfying about killing things with instruments.

[Swordgleam]

Thing is it's hard to keep enough ammunition around for a hulking hurler, so I started using the bard cantrip summon instrument (must be capable of wielding it in 2 hands, which is still kinda big for a half-ogre)

Love it. That's my new favourite example of creative absurdity that's totally RAW and yet not at all game-breaking.

[RelentlessImp]

Sir Danube Wilhelm von Plundercheeks, the Magnificent Bastard; a Pathfinder Cleric with ridiculous stats (4d4 down the line, reroll if average was below 9 or above 11). Basically designed with Sir Roderick Ponce von Fontlebottom from Jade Empire and General Plundercheeks from YAFGC in mind, a completely over-the-top noble who was utterly convinced he was the greatest warrior on life.

...Who then got owned in the very first encounter.

[Kallisti]

Jazz Hands, Mime Bard//Cleric of Charades, God of Silence. He took his vow of silence *very* seriously.

My favorite part was when he reached 10th level. Bard 10//Cleric of Charades 5/Evangelist 5. With Great Orator: Convert the Unfaithful, he could force entire crowds watching his pantomime of a bible-thumping sermon to make a Will save or convert.

Also, I remember reading the following exchange in someone's sig:
Player: I want to play an Awakened Gelatinous Cube Cleric of Rubik.
DM: Rubik:smallconfused:?
Player: Of course. Rubik. God of Cubes.

[Xallace]

An Awakened T-rex Archmage. Go ahead, laugh.

Awakened T-Rex Shadowdancer. Your move.

Personally, after finding this Third-Party supplement on Treants, and discovering that coniferous Treants had different stats, I wanted to play a Christmas Tree. But not just any Christmas Tree, one with the Hide in Plain Sight feature.

"Hey, dude, do evergreens normally grow in this part of the world?"
"What evergreen?"

What's better, there's a PrC that gives Treants immunity to fire damage, the ability to rage, and and a giant burning fist. Angry, vigilante Christmas Tree with fire powers? Aw yeah.

[mucat]

Which Niven story?

I'm not sure, but I must have read it also. I remember thinking "So that's what Niven* was talking about!" when I finally read the Agnostic's Prayer in Zelazny's Creatures of Light and Darkness.

* At the name, I didn't append any insulting epithets to Niven's name as I thought that. Shows how little I knew back then...

EDIT: The Niven story in question might have been "What Can You Say About Chocolate Manhole Covers?"

[Vangor]

Kender Paladin of Waukeen with Vow of Poverty using the 3.0 Cosmopolitan feat (Sleight of Hand), known as Brother Pretium Aufilch. In his mind, Waukeen guides his kleptomaniac hand, and every merchant hollering and shouting when he aimlessly begins wandering away with a shiny bauble imagining the good this might bring to sick orphans is actually a new enterprise waiting to spread wealth. To which he happily lends a hand, of course, turning the Kender curse of curiosity into a gift.

"What is this? You say you will let the orphans have this golden necklace if I venture into an ancient catacomb and retrieve a priceless artifact for you? You have yourself a deal."

[MorseCodePython]

My favorite character I ever played was a snarky trogolodyte who wore a Hat of Disguise that looked basically like a green bowler hat.

[Math_Mage]

I'm not sure, but I must have read it also. I remember thinking "So that's what Niven* was talking about!" when I finally read the Agnostic's Prayer in Zelazny's Creatures of Light and Darkness.

* At the name, I didn't append any insulting epithets to Niven's name as I thought that. Shows how little I knew back then...

EDIT: The Niven story in question might have been "What Can You Say About Chocolate Manhole Covers?"

No way, in that one? Gee, I need to go reread the short stories again.

...what was that about insulting epithets? Because if you are insulting the Niven, I may have to go :smallfurious::smallfurious::smallfurious: on your face.

[magic9mushroom]

Hatchling Phaerimm are pretty ridiculous.

I mean, they're a tiny floating windsock.

You wouldn't think that they're the most powerful race in the game barring Shaedling, would you?

[Ernir]

Huh, I forgot to list my blind Archer.

[Volkov]

Oh and my T-rex archmage, not only did he wear a robe and a pointy hat, but he knew Tenebrous's Last word. He is now the guardian of the last word in the campaign setting I use.

[Creed]

1: Awakened Dire Badger Ninja
2: A Capone style mobster. In a medievel campaign. So no guns, but pistol crossbows.
3:My elvish bard of sorrow. He was a heavy angster, and it ended up that all his bard songs were made by a guy named Linkin Park (pun), and ended up never giving beneficial effects to his team, but negative effects to everyone. The party then learned how to compensate with earplugs.

[Graymayre]

1. A fighter that dual-wielded Shields.

2. A paladin that was in-fact a cleric

3. A commoner whose only claim to fame was a tract in the dragonmarked classes and feats

4. An "Action Bastard", someone who is based entirely around using action points.

These were all characters my group has made over the years, there are many more but they are elluding me.

[Darth Stabber]

Awakened mouse wilder that manifested all kinds of lightning.

Dumb brute sorcerer with a psuedodragon familiar, and I rp'd the familiar.

[Lappy9000]

Minotaur Psychic Warrior with a psicrystal that was a geode named Rocky the Mineral American. The Minotaur's Intelligence was 6 and Rocky's Intelligence was 9. Literally, dumber than a rock.

[gallagher]

For those not in the know, Iborighu is an evil deity of cold and winter, whose goal is to envelop the world entirely in snow. As you might imagine, he doesn't have many followers. Well, as a Favored of Iborighu, I hatched a cunning plan. I would go to playgrounds, carnivals, and pretty much anywhere else that attracted young children.

"Hey kids, don't ya' hate homework?"
"Yeah!"
"Don't you wish you didn't have to do homework, that you could stay outside and play all day?"
"YEAH!"
"Wouldn't it be awesome if you could just not go to school at all?"
"YEAH!"
"You know what gets you out of school?"
"What?"
"Snow days."

So many converts.

this post is made of wins and ice cream

[Critical]

The current character of mine is a Halfling Wizard, then got his soul infused by a spirit of some barbarian(replacing the wizard level with a barbarian level), went insane and thinks that he got his magical abilities back. We're Playing FR, so when we got into the Wild Magic zone, afterwards he claimed that he was Wild Mage and was ready to solve any situation, particularily "buffing" with Sausages of Charisma(occured when we needed major diplomacy buff), throwing various stuff as spells(including his spellbook, which drowned in the sea) and claiming that he did all the magic in the battle our sorcerer and wizard did. When he rages, he thinks he's casting very powerful spells.

EDIT: Grammar.

[PersonMan]

I have yet to play this character, but he's a wizard who is based around the word "yo" and the rocker four-finger up thing.

So, whenever he casts a spell, it...changes. Fireball? "Yo Explosion". Shocking Grasp? "Yo Shocker". Etc.

Also, somatic components would be changed to some weird hand/arm swinging, and he had to have both hands in the four-finger-thing position to hold a spell charge or cast a spell.

[JohnnyCancer]

Played a game of "Marine Corps. D&D," which is a drinking game version of D&D. One of the characters was a double-amputee dwarf fighter who used a spiked codpiece, had to pelvic thrust his opponents to death.

There's the GWARforged: warforged barbarian/bard who uses spikes and the power of rock.

Play an awakened squirrel with a Greater Titan Bloodline.

[waterpenguin43]

I once tried to make a druidic hippy with this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWN2xaOhj1U) as it's theme song, which played whenever it was his turn, but my DM said no.

[Loxagn]

Sprocket, the Warforged Druid. Ah, fun times.
Every time he Wild Shapes, it is accompanied by my making the Transformers noise.

[Jastermereel]

One of my current players is a catfolk bard who focuses on telling stories with finger puppets (which the player actually has on hand) and performing with bells attached to dreads in his hair. Not quite as zany as some, but the campaign is still young.

[Greenish]

Also, somatic components would be changed to some weird hand/arm swingingChanged? :smallconfused:

[iElf]

best shadowrun character ever: lucky lou , the gun slinger who comes by on his edge(luck) stat alone. he killed a Dragon whit a single shot one.... from a light handgun

[PersonMan]

Changed? :smallconfused:

Well, changed to be more like "swing arm/hand at enemy, release spell!".

Which makes ACF make no sense, as most armor wouldn't mess with those motions...

[AslanCross]

Paladin/Grayguard with armor shaped like Shining/Burning Gundam, that frequently uses his Lay on Hands ability to deal damage, complete with quotes from the show.

Edit: And Yes, his holy symbol would be tattoed to the back of his hand. :smallamused:

Does he have a flaming burst greatsword activated by saying "WITH MY RAGE, MY ANGER, AND ALL OF MY SORROW!!!"?

[Dragero]

I feel stupid......

Where is the awakened template found?

[PairO'Dice Lost]

I feel stupid......

Where is the awakened template found?

Awakened isn't a template; an awakened creature is a formerly-nonsapient creature that's had awaken (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/awaken.htm), awaken undead, awaken construct, etc, cast on it.

[Dragero]

Cool.

So If I where able to awaken an elephant, and then teach it to hold a club in it`s trunk, that would work?

Could I pay a druid to awaken an ant?

[PairO'Dice Lost]

Cool.

So If I where able to awaken an elephant, and then teach it to hold a club in it`s trunk, that would work?

Could I pay a druid to awaken an ant?

Yes and yes, though the elephant's combat capability with said club probably wouldn't be all that impressive.

[Swordgleam]

Yes and yes, though the elephant's combat capability with said club probably wouldn't be all that impressive.

Speak for yourself. I'd be impressed by an elephant swinging a club, no matter how inaccurately. Especially if I were near said elephant at the time.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

Speak for yourself. I'd be impressed by an elephant swinging a club, no matter how inaccurately. Especially if I were near said elephant at the time.

Why? Elephants move and manipulate tree trunks and such with their trunks in the wild all the time; if you awakened an elephant, I'd expect that to be it's fighting style. :smallwink:

More to the point, I was speaking from a mechanical perspective, because I could see a DM ruling that it's an improvised weapon, that its trunk isn't dexterous enough to wield it without penalties, etc. I'd personally just let them treat it as an appropriately-sized greatclub, but the rules on awakened animals are vague to nonexistent, so I could see how they'd rule it that way.

[daa18]

My most ridiculous character was a halfling hedgehog master. He threw hedgehogs which he had trained to attack the people they were thrown at.

You'd be surprised how effective throwing small animals is when they're pointy and have injury poison.:smallamused:

[Achilles]

This isn't too ridiculous, but my current character is an elven barbarian. I modeled him after the Aztec Eagle Warriors. He even eats hearts of his enemies.

[Archpaladin Zousha]

Weirdest character I ever heard of was an epic character my brother told me he played with. A half-orc warrior (never was sure if he was a fighter or barbarian) named Sir B*tchsmack. What made him incredibly ridiculous was his weapon of choice. You all know what a caber is, right? The large tree trunks used by Scotsmen in athletic competitions. Well, Sir B*tchsmack fought by throwing hollow cabers...stuffed with dynamite. And whenever he was about to attack, he'd yell out "CABER!" and some NPC would always yell "AAH! RUN LIKE HELL!!!"

And he also was in posession of a half-orc porn magazine that became something of a running gag in later games. Aside from Sir B*tchsmack, anyone who looked at the thing had to make a Will save or fall backwards down a flight of stairs in sheer horror. Even in the middle of the desert where there were no stairs. The first few times this happened we were like "Wait a minute, how'd that giant scorpion fall down the stairs? We're outside." Finally the DM handwaved it by saying a flight of stairs magically appeared behind you when you beheld the half orc porno mag.

[Swordgleam]

Why? Elephants move and manipulate tree trunks and such with their trunks in the wild all the time; if you awakened an elephant, I'd expect that to be it's fighting style. :smallwink:


What I'm saying is, if an elephant is in front of me hitting enemies with a tree trunk, I'm not gonna be the one to say, "That's not too impressive."

[absolmorph]

Does he have a flaming burst greatsword activated by saying "WITH MY RAGE, MY ANGER, AND ALL OF MY SORROW!!!"?
I was wondering why I looked that up...
Exact quote:
"Take this! My love, my anger and all of my sorrow!" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFo0_nYPLmQ)