Let's Play Neopets! (And slowly go insane!)

[Vespe Ratavo]

My username is Shrapnelwolf (http://www.neopets.com/userlookup.phtml?user=shrapnelwolf), if you want to "Neofriend" me, or whatever the kids are calling it these days.

Thread Index:
Day 0 and 1 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8481885&postcount=8)
Day 3 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8488836&postcount=18)
Day 6 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8513423&postcount=22)
Day 8 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8525144&postcount=33)
Day 12 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8551472&postcount=52)
Original post:

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to Neopia (http://www.neopets.com/index.phtml), or, as some youngin's like myself might call it, a trip down memory lane. Please keep all arms, legs, and nostalgia inside the vehicle at all times.

At the moment, you may be asking yourself questions. Like, what am Neopets? Is this actually a video game, or merely some sort of glorified Tamagotchi? Why do I remember what a Tamagotchi is? Why should I be interested?

In order, an online fantasy-pet-raising sim thingy, somewhat, but not entirely unlike, Pokémon, sort of, because you spent entirely too much time in the 90's, and we're getting to that.

This isn't merely going to be an aimless meandering (although there will be plenty of that). Consider it a rematch. I spent quite a while on this site as a kid, but now I'm back, older, smarter, and wiser, or at least older, anyway. And the ultimate goal of this little expedition will be...

Wait for it...

*places pinky to mouth*

One million Neopoints.

Of course, it's been years since I actually played this game, so a million may be more like five. If that turns out to be the case, the goal will promptly be revised to something more challenging.

The LP will be written in first person point of view, hopefully in a manner as entertaining as Mr. Swoon's Monster (http://lparchive.org/LetsPlay/Monster%20Rancher/)Rancher (http://lparchive.org/LetsPlay/Monster%20Rancher%202/)playthroughs.

Questions? Suggestions? Snide remarks?

[Lord Loss]

My reaction to this was some nostalgic mixture of Yipeee! and EEEEEEEK!

i will definitley be following this.


Grundos, Wheel of Misfortune, Tyrannia, Halloween Paint, Tombola, Haikus...

My heart is filled with happy memories of Neopets past.

:biggrin:

[Assassin89]

I remember being on that site, but then I got a real pet, not to mention that now you can easily purchase neopoints.

I remember the Lost Desert plot, the Tyrannia plot, and possible several other plots. I never really enjoyed the battledome though.

[SlyGuyMcFly]

Somehow, I managed to survive the nineties without ever falling for the Neopets dealie. Which means I'm very, very curious to see how this goes.

[Draconi Redfir]

many many years ago my neopets account was hacked... i got it back a few months ago... and now i forgot my new password... it sucks.

[Deme]

Good luck. I fell for it, then quit, then fell off the wagon, then quit, then fell of the wagon quite a few times in my youth. I finally quit for good after realizing what I wanted from the game was no longer around. I was pretty relieved by that, tell the truth. Still, I'll be following this with interest.

[Fri]

You have higher SAN stats than me man. Just be careful of chris hansen inquisistion. Nobody expect chris hansen inquisition.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Day 0
Dear diary journal,

Still no luck finding a place to live. Every apartment in town is full up, and I can't afford a house on my meager salary of "nothing." I sure could use a convenient deus ex machina right about now.

Now. Now. Nooooow. No-
Day 1

Well, that was interesting. In about two hours I've received some sort of genetically mutated dog that thinks he's a bee, about a thousand "Neopoints," which seem to be worth slightly less than Japanese Yen, and become homeless. Again.

I woke up in a sort of featureless field, with a tiny yellow man jumping up and down and telling me how to do things like eat.

http://img19.imageshack.us/img19/9276/tutorialsx.jpg

I tried to push him out of the way, but he looked so terribly depressed. So I sat and I listened. He gave me an official certificate inside a glass case. I have no idea where I'm going to put it.

Right after that, this...thing came up to me. An old-timey ragtime tune played as it jaunted along.

http://img693.imageshack.us/img693/4929/gelert1.jpg

I am the Queen of France!
I'm sure you are.
You dare question my regal authority?
Do you have a name, or what?
I am Queen V-
I'm going to call you Mistah B. Because you're blue, and that staff looks sorta like it came from a bee. :smallsmile:
I swear, as soon as I find my guillotine...

It was at that point I noticed this thing by Mistah B's side.

http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/7613/origamiy.jpg

And that is...
My pet.
It's made of cardboard.
He's my friend.

I had to turn it away from me. That thing stares into my soul.

Mistah B and his freaky little cardboard thing wouldn't leave me alone, so I figured I might as well officially adopt him. And thus does our story begin.
Note to self. Saving directly into JPEG from Paint looks terrible. Apologies for the list style writing, there aren't many ways to make "I started the game, got my pet, and looked through my lewt" interesting. I might go back and try and make it more interesting later.

Also, Mistah B speaks in Dark Blue. I speak in Blue. This may have to be changed, as well.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Ah, yes... the cardboard petpets....

They still confuse me to this day...

[Jokasti]

I liked Neopets until they sold their souls.

[druid91]

The thing that annoyed me was getting a full grown krawk. Instead I had to settle for a shoyru.....

Is it bad that I remember the names of the things off the top of my head?:smalleek:

[nanobot_swarm]

No, no!
The Queen of France should be runing away from the Guillotine, not looking for it.
After all, the Bougiousie and those other Enlightenment thinkers aren't too happy with her.

Will follow, with interest, didn't really like Neopets when I tried it, but the tower destroyer game was fun though.

[Assassin89]

I liked Neopets until they sold their souls.

When was that? When they started McDonalds promotions or when people could buy Neopoints.

[Mewtarthio]

No, no!
The Queen of France should be runing away from the Guillotine, not looking for it.
After all, the Bougiousie and those other Enlightenment thinkers aren't too happy with her.

It's a giant blue dog-thing with some sort of golden scepter/microphone contraption. Why do you expect it to be an expert on European History?

[nanobot_swarm]

She/it probably should, after all France is a Democracy now.
Score one for Robspierre!
http://gulfanalysis.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/robespierre1.gif

[Caewil]

Didn't Robspierre get his head chopped off as well? All I can think of is what a rat he was.

[SlyGuyMcFly]

To call the French Revolution a 'complicated time' could be understating things. By a lot.

[Vespe Ratavo]

Day 3
It's been about 46 hours since I've arrived here, and despite my persistent queries, Mistah B insists he's still not hungry. I assume he either has a very slow metabolism, or some sort of demonic black magic keeping him alive. Most likely both. I'm keeping an eye on the cardboard...thing.

Since I still have about half a box of Triscuits left, I see no reason to spend my meager earnings on food. Instead, I decide to get more money. The job listings around here are...odd.


*Commander needed for medieval army. Must be an Eyrie wizard. Bring your own hat.
*Assistant Pirate needed for purposes of piloting a boat to pick up dubloons. Bring your own eyepatch.
*Sentient Kangaroo requires assistance with Sudoku puzzles -

Etc., etc.

I figured a job counting potatoes sounded safe all right. I guess I can keep writing while I do that, I don't see any reason why -

OH MY GOD
http://img442.imageshack.us/img442/4951/potatoes1.png
POTATOES
http://i147.photobucket.com/albums/r286/Moon_Called/potatoescopy.jpg?t=1273794341
POTATOES EVERYWHERE

So many potatoes. They swarmed me. Just flew at me. From out of nowhere. I'm covered with potato bruises. I swear I heard them laughing at me as I grabbed my money and ran. Mistah B got a complimentary baked potato. He laughed at me. But he doesn't know. He doesn't know the horror.

They're watching. Always watching.

I suspect the cardboard is on their side. I have to keep moving.
The "jobs," of course, are mini-games. Awesome potato-eye-shop courtesy of Moon_Called. Current NeoPoints tally is 1,373, I didn't really try on the Potato Counter.

[Pandaren]

:smallbiggrin:

I love it

Nostalgic, humourous, need to stay on top of this.

[riccaru]

Have they got any new pets lately? Rather, any that are interesting? I may just start playing again for the cardboard petpet. Epic win there

[Vespe Ratavo]

Have they got any new pets lately? Rather, any that are interesting? I may just start playing again for the cardboard petpet. Epic win there
They have a llama. I don't know how new he is, but man is he adorable. I was just about to get one, but nostalgia won out (a blue Gelert was my first pet).

[Vespe Ratavo]

Day 6
I've been hiding in a box with a potato peeler for the past three days. I had a knife, too, but I accidentally threw it at a potato-shaped rock and was too afraid to go get it. Mistah B's been entirely content to laze around, have tea parties with his "royal subjects," and occasionally nudge the box and say things like "I thirst for ketchup."

Today, though, he finally tipped it over.

B: Oi. I'm starving over here.
V: Well, why don't you just go back to the potato farm, then? They're harmless, you know. Totally harmless.
B: Becau -
V: That's what they want you to think. And then bam! You're crinkle-cut and frying! They demand vengeance! Vengeance!

It turns out stray pets get snatched up and put in the adoption center. I was about to ask how, exactly, this would be a bad thing for me, but then he growled at me and waved his little staff. It looks pretty solid. And possibly honey-filled. Who knows what that stuff can do?

After a minor argument, I managed to convince Mistah B there was no way in hell I was parting with my money for something as petty as food, cardboard had lots of fiber, and I had plenty left. He rolled his eyes and told me about some kind of giant omelet.

Apparently, it's in a pre-historic world filled with dinosaurs. But they're nice dinosaurs. And the omelet has carrots and peas in it.

I am becoming more and more convinced I am in some kind of limbo, or somebody put something funny in my Mountain Dew.

Carrots, peas, eggs and cardboard is delicious.
I hope you like text. I may go back and add screenshots, but I needed to get an update up before I abandoned this thing.

[Raistlin1040]

Oh. My. God.

That is a lot of potatos.

[blackfox]

Definitely following this now. Neopets is so damn addictive.

[Klose_the_Sith]

This LP is just awesomely awesome :smallbiggrin:

[onasuma]

I actually booted up neopets after reading this. Got myself a weird... green... kangaroo thing. Used to go down to the library with a friend of mine (well, ex-friend, but thats anothe story) and play this thing. oh, but whats with all the advertising? Back in my day we didnt have that sort of thing...

[Assassin89]

I actually booted up neopets after reading this. Got myself a weird... green... kangaroo thing. Used to go down to the library with a friend of mine (well, ex-friend, but thats anothe story) and play this thing. oh, but whats with all the advertising? Back in my day we didnt have that sort of thing...

You mean a Blumaroo? I started along with my sister. While she started with a Bruce because she likes penguins, I started with a Cybunny.

[onasuma]

Thats the thing. I always liked dice-a-roo.

Vaguely related question: If the lowest level thing in the arena is level 10, how am I meant to get beyond level 1?

[Draconi Redfir]

i started with a skeith, then got a shoyru later on.

[Lord Loss]

I'm going and making a Neopet now.

Also, put all the posts on the first post so they're easier to find.

Great Work!

[Sliver]

Gah! No! I need to study, not check what Neopets is all about... NO! NOO! NOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo

[Castaras]

Darn you Vespe. You made me go look at my old account on Neopets. ( I could actually remember the password on it. O.O)

Started Playing: March 5, 2006

Maaaaan, that's years ago. O.o I feel old(ish).

[Vespe Ratavo]

I actually booted up neopets after reading this.

Darn you Vespe. You made me go look at my old account on Neopets. ( I could actually remember the password on it. O.O)

Gah! No! I need to study, not check what Neopets is all about... NO! NOO! NOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooo

I'm going and making a Neopet now.

Also, put all the posts on the first post so they're easier to find.

Great Work!
Muahaha. My brainwashing is working. Also, Lord Loss, consider it done.

Day 8
We've been camping out by the giant egg (http://www.neopets.com/prehistoric/omelette.phtml) for two days now. I was planning on stuffing as much of it as I could into my pockets (which can apparently hold 50 things, however big or small) and making a run for it, but this green...wolf...with tusks, growls at me whenever I try to take more than one slice a day.


http://img31.imageshack.us/img31/7707/dinolupe.jpg

Sabre-X growls 'NO! You cannot take more than one slice per day!

Yeah, screw you too, buddy. You and your inexplicably perfect English.

Luckily, the Jurassic definition of a "slice" is pretty liberal, so I think Mistah B and I can manage until we make enough money to buy better food.

My tummy feels funny.

It builds character.

In other news, I've recently started working for a demolition company, the main activity of which seems to be placing explosives on colorful blocks (http://www.neopets.com/games/play.phtml?game_id=999&size=regular&quality=high) and watching the chain reactions. Yeah, I don't get it either. It might possibly be paying well, but I still have no idea what the value of a NeoPoint is, seeing as how I haven't been to any stores yet.

I've also decided we should think about buying a home.
Neohome.
Does everything here have to have Neo in front of it?
Does every Apple product have an i in front of it?
Touche. Very overdone, but touche.

Anyway, I figure since the egg is here, it would be a good idea to -
Huh, look at this. "Live on Virtupets Space Station. Free shuttle service."
...did you say space station?
Yeah. There's listings for tropical islands, too. And faerie clouds, and flying evil citadels, and underwater, and...
One moment. I have to consult the internet.
Since when do we have a computer?
All right, peoples, time for your input. Where should I build my house (http://www.neopets.com/neohome/real_estate)? OOC, I don't think it matters too much, but I'm trying to play this as if it were semi-realistic. Which means no teleporting (http://www.neopets.com/explore.phtml)to every country every day. I'm not sure if it's possible to "move," so choose carefully.

Without further ado, the choices.
Neopia Central (http://www.neopets.com/objects.phtml) - generic, "normal" town
Mystery Island (http://www.neopets.com/island/index.phtml)- tiki tropical island
Haunted Woods (http://www.neopets.com/halloween/index.phtml) - exactly what it sounds like
Terror Mountain (http://www.neopets.com/winter/index.phtml) - frozen wasteland, also snowball fights
Faerieland (http://www.neopets.com/faerieland/index.phtml) - always, I wanna be with you, and make believe with you, and live in harmony harmony oh love (http://games.adultswim.com/robot-unicorn-attack-twitchy-online-game.html)
Tyrannia (http://www.neopets.com/prehistoric/index.phtml) - where I've been so far
The Lost Desert (http://www.neopets.com/desert/index.phtml) - like Egypt, only with more puzzles
Meridell (http://www.neopets.com/medieval/index.phtml) - home of the dreaded potatoes
Roo Island (http://www.neopets.com/worlds/index_roo.phtml) - apparently mushroom-themed island, home to the Blumaroos, degenerate gambling hive
Brightvale (http://www.neopets.com/medieval/brightvale.phtml)- medieval, basically Meridell, with more sunshine and less evil potatoes
Maraqua (http://www.neopets.com/water/index.phtml)- under the sea, in an octopus' garden in the shade
Darigan Citadel (http://www.neopets.com/medieval/index_evil.phtml) - evil citadel floating above Meridell, a vantage point against the fried, hashed, and baked menace
Shenkuu (http://www.neopets.com/shenkuu/index.phtml)- feudal Japan, only different
Altador (http://www.neopets.com/altador/index.phtml)- sort of an ancient Greek/Roman deal
Kiko Lake (http://www.neopets.com/worlds/index_kikolake.phtml) - home to the Kikos, apparently has a beach resort theme
Krawk Island (http://www.neopets.com/pirates/index.phtml) - yar har fiddle dee dee, being a pirate is all right to be
Kreludor (http://www.neopets.com/moon/index.phtml)- top secret moon base
Lutari Island (http://www.neopets.com/tropical/index.phtml) - kinda like Pandora
Virtupets Space Station (http://www.neopets.com/space/index.phtml) - it's a freaking space station

[Raistlin1040]

Haunted Woods!

[lord pringle]

Haunted Woods!

Totally, dude!

[Mr. Moon]

Japan.
Stand in.
Go there.
Nao.
Fine, don't go there.
I'm gonna be popular and vote for Darigan Citadel.

[Mewtarthio]

Some place nightmarish. Either Haunted Woods or Terror Mountain.

[Blue Ghost]

I'm from Maraqua, so if you set your home there, we can talk sometime. My Acara, Mariann, and I would love to meet with you. :smallsmile:

Wow, it's been so long since I've been to Neopets. Good times, sir. I will be watching this.

[The Shadowmind]

This made me check out my old neopets file:Started Playing: February 4, 2002.

I vote for Darigan Citadel, nothing says home sweet home like evil empire, or maybe I'm just mad.

[chiasaur11]

Just one thing.

The "slowly" in the title? Seems... doubtful.

[SlyGuyMcFly]

Evil Flying Fortress of Doom... or MOON BASE!

People! It's a freaking MOON BASE!

[The Glyphstone]

Flying evil castle or space station.

[onasuma]

Space station. You can play Attack of the Evil Fuzzles then.

[Draconi Redfir]

ferieland, its full of hot chicks with wings!:smallwink:

[Kurien]

Hi guise, I just want to say that this thread evoked a feeling of nostalgia in me, since I used to frequent Neopets long ago from grade three to five. Seeing other people say that they still play encouraged me to make a new account.

Kyriune is my account's name (all the other variations of Kyrien seem to be taken). The only conundrum is what will be my first poke neopet. I remember my old ones were a lupe and a kougra, but I also kind of like one species introduced after I stopped playing: the xweetok. It kind of looks like a cross between a squirrel/cat, and it has high starting stats.

And, I think Vespe should try and make his home on PandoraLutari.

Edit: I thought I had capitalized my username... huh. Does it automatically decapitalize my name, or should I consider this a major screw up?

[Destro_Yersul]

I vote for Egypt, but with puzzles. Because that was always my favourite area.

[Inigo Montoya]

Faerieland! Faerieland!

[Assassin89]

Faerie Land has that wheel, so you could get some stuff.

The account name I used for neopets is Poliwag1123, but I highly doubt I will be going back there anytime soon.

[Vespe Ratavo]

And poll closed. Darigan Citadel it is. LP will be accordingly updated whenever I feel like it sometime today.

[tribble]

And poll closed. Darigan Citadel it is. LP will be accordingly updated whenever I feel like it sometime today.

You are a lying monster if you let this die now. people who do not finish let's plays are like cancer.:smallfurious:

[Domochevsky]

You are a lying monster if you let this die now. people who do not finish let's plays are like cancer.:smallfurious:

Yes, motivate him some more! o/

[Vespe Ratavo]

You are a lying monster if you let this die now. people who do not finish let's plays are like cancer.:smallfurious:
Yes, truly, delaying an update by one day due to any number of things is letting it die.

Day 12
Well, you heard the internet, Mistah B, we're going to the evil flying castle in the sky. Pack your bags.
I don't have any bags. Or worldly possessions, my regal scepter notwithstanding. How are we even going to get there?

Some time later...

Climbing a mile-high ladder hurts my hands.
Lucky you. I don't have opposable thumbs.
Right, so, the real estate guy said to meet him right here -

http://img175.imageshack.us/img175/4161/dudeo.jpg

Hey there, kid. My name's Frank. You ah, lookin' ta buy a house around here?

So it turns out Frank is a really nice guy. He told us he used to be a reporter, and that he went into real estate to get some peace and quiet. Why he works in a demonic castle floating above...above...that place, I have no idea, but I don't want to question his methods. He says he used to cover wars.

He got us a really nice spot on the edge of the citadel, with only one blood stained room, which he says is a good bargain. The house also has a room with a view of Meridell, which I intend to pour concrete over as soon as possible. Come to think of it, there's only one room in the house that doesn't terrify me. I think I'm gonna stay there for a while.

So, how much is this place, anyway?
Oh, it's free.
Free?
Yeah, you know, gotta move fast, sell low.
I don't think that's how capitalism wor -
You want some furniture? Your dog over there is blue. Do you like blue? I hope you like blue, because I've got blue tables, blue chairs, blue carpets -
Let me guess, also free?
Yeah. On the condition that if anyone comes by asking for me, you tell them I skipped town to Kreludor two weeks ago.
Done and done.

Here's some photos of the new place. It's pretty fancy outside, but I like to think the inside is humble.
We're going to have lighting besides that lamp soon, right? It's creeping me out.
Hush, I think it can hear us.

Outside
http://img194.imageshack.us/img194/6430/neohomeoutside.jpg
Inside
http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/373/neohomeinside.jpg
NeoPoint total: 3,029
I really do need to figure out how to make JPG's not look like total boop.

Also, since it hasn't been mentioned up until this point, my username is Shrapnelwolf (http://www.neopets.com/userlookup.phtml?user=shrapnelwolf). Please, I know you're eager to send me all your worldly possessions, but I must ask that you restrain yourselves to only giving me your undying love and praise.

[Mewtarthio]

I hate to be a bother, but it appears that your lamp is possessed.

Also, kudos on the Dead Rising reference

[Raistlin1040]

I second that statement. It would seem as though your lamp is flying.

I don't think Mistah B is going to like this house much.

[Terry576]

Possessed lamp. I'm... Shocked and amused at the same time. :smalltongue:

[Kurien]

You haven't logged on your Neoaccount in 19 days... when do you plan on getting back to it? Or should I consider this an abandoned LP?

[Domochevsky]

The lamp must have gotten him. :smallfrown:

[tribble]

ugh, the new neo-home layout is terribad. it looks like a carbon copy of the layout used for that gimmicky thing that tried to combine neopets with beanie babies.:smalleek: