Pungeon Pendragon, Martial Truenaming [ToB Discipline]

[Morph Bark]

Pungeon Pendragon


"There was once a battle at a place called Thermopylae, where three hundred brave Greeks held off a Persian army of a million men... a million, you understand this number?"
"I understand this number."
~ Captain Algren talking to Lord Katsumoto, discussing the ancient might of the Sublime Way.

http://i47.tinypic.com/104j15f.png
Art by VegasMike (http://vegasmike.deviantart.com/)

Swashbuckling heroes are fond of using rapier wit alongside their rapiers, shooting arrows accompanied by shooting puns and even when things look bleak, they throw in a joke before throwing in the towel. Bards and wise men often recall famous words by famous men, used in the past to great effect in orations and battle speeches: all the more proof that the power of wordplay lies and speaks true in all languages, even the most ancient and intricarious ones. Those who learn the most ancient and most intricatastrophic of all and weave it into their combat routines are the practioners of the Pungeon Pendragon style: their very actions speak truer than Truespeech.

The key skill for Pungeon Pendragon is Truespeak (ToM 195); using Truespeak as part of a maneuver does not provoke attacks of opportunity unless the maneuver specifies so. When using a maneuver that requires a Truespeak check more than once, the Truespeak DC increases by 2 as normal, but this only happens if it is used more than once per encounter rather than once per day as with utterances; if the attack misses, the DC does not increase for the next time you use that maneuver, as normal with utterances. Discipline weapons include rapier wit, swords of a certain length, ass-whipping, an arm full of strikes and improvisionary weapons.

Because the Pungeon Pendragon discipline was never taught at the Temple of the Nine Swords that Reshar founded, or any similar center of training for that matter, most martial adepts do not know any maneuvers from it, or even know it exists. There are two ways to master the discipline. The first is to have been trained in it. If you choose to make a martial adept that has already been trained in the Pungeon Pendragon discipline, you simply replace one discipline that adept could normally learn with maneuvers from with the Pungeon Pendragon discipline. He loses the associated skill of the replaced discipline as a class skill, but gains Truespeak as a class skill.

The other way is to seek out a master of the Pungeon Pendragon discipline–a martial adept capable of using at least 5th-level maneuvers from the discipline–and training under him. You must train for a month under the master, and spend 1,000 xp at the end of your training. You gain the ability to learn maneuvers from the Pungeon Pendragon discipline, and add Truespeak to your martial adept class’s list of class skills. In addition, you may exchange your maneuvers known for maneuvers of the Pungeon Pendragon discipline. You may exchange one maneuver of each level, and the new maneuvers you learn must be of the same level as the exchanged maneuvers.


For Truespeak and truenaming rules, use the ones presented here (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=120488).

[Morph Bark]

1st level
Alea Iacta Est!: Strike−Get a random outcome that increases damage.
Puny Man’s Defiance: Stance−Establish subconscious telepathic links with your allies for knowledge of speech. Gain bonus on attack.
Rapier Wit: Strike−Double your crit range and may use your Dex modifier instead of Str for attack.

2nd level
Cutting Remark: Strike−Gain bonus damage dice depending on Truespeak result.
Lexical Innuendo: Boost or Counter−Grant +4 bonus on Bluff and Perform checks or make an opponent flat-footed.
Proper Punctuation: Counter−Spellcaster must make a Concentration check or fail.

3rd level
Fightin’ Shade: Create an area of darkness that does not affect your sight.
Freez’n’fire it up: Counter−Hold person for one round, plus cold and fire damage.
Pay Back in Mind: Strike−Truespeak check to attack someone who attacked you or your allies. May take damage voluntarily to boost check.
Truelepathic Interfearence: Counter−Stabilize an ally or allow him to throw off the effects of fear or poison.

4th level
Fare Trade: Strike−Give your target the disease or poison in your own body. Gain bonus damage depending on relationship with target.
Pun Fursonified: Boost−Get a natural armour bonus to AC or an enhancement bonus to Str, Dex, Con or Wis. Grow fur.
We Chappy Few: Stance−Give some allies within 60 feet special bonuses which you may change for the situation.

5th level
Molon Labe!: Boost−Gain protection from ranged attacks and shield and dodge bonuses to AC depending on your Truespeak result.
Ow, My Puncreas!: Counter−Opponent who attacks you takes 1d4 Con or Cha damage.
Survivalar Evolution: Stance−Reach the peak of ability of surviving a battle, but become incapable of attack.
Three Times’ the Harm: Strike− Make three Truespeak checks instead of attack rolls. Use your highest roll with a bonus.

6th level
Crave Misteak: Counter−Parry and attack twice, gaining bonus hp.
Purricane of Huns: Boost−Create copies of yourself who, along with yourself, fly into a rage. Grow whiskeys.
Shanks for the Memories: Counter−Enemy that attacked you becomes flat-footed and provokes attacks of opportunity.

7th level
Eternal Soliloquy: Counter−Time stop effect on you and one foe, Truespeak checks deal damage.
I came, I saw, I Concorde: Strike−Spring attack with increased speed.
It’s a Punderful World: Add plainer traits to the area surrounding you.

8th level
Hypurrcane of Puns: Stance−Become an objectionable subject to air walk and haste. Grow whiskeys.
Pun-punk: Strike−Summon a weapon with magic bonuses for a single round.
Pundemonium: Strike−Foes you strike will save against permanent confusion and petrifaction.

9th level
Crowning Moment of Punny/Pawsome: Strike−Use Truespeech to reach a foe and utterly slaughter him verbally with your actions.


NOTE: While basic writeups for most maneuvers are already done, they still need to be written more clearly and with some fluffy detail if possible, which is why not all maneuver names are listed yet. Wouldn't want to spoil anything would I? All done!

[Morph Bark]

1st level
Alea Iacta Est
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 1
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee Attack

Casting your soul into fate you speak words that reinforce your determination. You hear the faint clatter of a sheep’s anklebones just before you move to strike your opponent.

You must succeed on a DC 15 Truespeak check. If you succeed, roll 1d6 to determine the effect: Gain +1 bonus on damage
Gain +1d2 bonus on damage.
Gain +1d3 bonus on damage.
Gain +1d4 bonus on damage.
Gain +1d6 bonus on damage.
Gain +1d8 bonus on damage.

Puny Man’s Defiance
Pungeon Pendragon (Stance)
Level: XX??!! 1
Prerequisite: One Pungeon Pendragon maneuver
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: 50 ft
Target: All allies
Duration: Stance

You focus, honing your mind as you murmur the most ancient of words as you pray for aid, reaching out mentally.

You establish a mental link with one ally within 50 feet of you that is willing. You cannot communicate with them through this link, but you become able to understand and speak any language that those you link with can. You gain a +1 bonus on attack rolls for every two languages you are capable of speaking, including languages you become capable of speaking through this stance (minimum +1 bonus).

Rapier Wit
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 1
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee Attack

Your tongue lashes out, as does your blade, hurting your opponent’s ego at least as much as his body.

While using this maneuver, your critical hit range doubles (from 20 to 19-20, from 19-20 to 17-20 and from 18-20 to 15-20) and you can use your Dex modifier on your attack roll instead of your Str modifier. You may do this with any weapon, but if you have Improved Critical for that weapon or are using a keen weapon, your critical hit range does not double again.

2nd level
Cutting Remark
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 2
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee Attack

Before you move to make your attack, you utter a quick word and then your weapon shoots forth with great speed in the blink of an eye.

Make a Truespeak check. If your result is at least 10, you gain 1d6 bonus damage on your attack if you hit. For each 10 points by which your check result exceeds 10 you gain an additional 1d6 bonus damage.

Lexical Innuendo
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter or Boost)
Level: XX??!! 2
Initiation Action: One immediate action (Counter use) or one swift action (Boost use)
Range: Personal
Duration: 1 round

Everyone appreciates some good ol' red-lighted humour! With a quick thrust your words shoot out of your mouth to throw your opponent off-guard.

Make a Truespeak check, DC 15 + target's HD + target's Wis mod. If you use this maneuver as a counter (immediate action) your opponent becomes flat-footed after his attack. If you use this maneuver as a boost (swift action), all Bluff or Perform check you or a designated ally (not both) roll in the same round gain a +4 bonus.

Proper Punctuation
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 2
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Range: 30 ft

You notice a nearby spellcaster casting a spell, and you quickly begin to shout at him in Truespeech to throw off his concentration, as you instinctively try to “correct” his phrasings.

Make a Truespeak check. You take a -5 penalty on this check. The spellcaster must make a Concentration check with a DC equal to your Truespeak check result or fail in the casting of his spell.

3rd level
Fightin’ Shade
Pungeon Pendragon [Darkness]
Level: XX??!! 3
Initiation Action: One standard action
Duration: 1 min/initiator level
Range: 30 ft

You don’t need arrows to blot out the sun, you simply say the right words…

You create a cloud of shadowy illumination out to a 30-foot radius around yourself. All creatures in the area, including you, gain concealment (20% miss chance). Even creatures that can normally see in such conditions (such as with darkvision or low-light vision) have the miss chance in an area shrouded in magical darkness.
Normal lights (torches, candles, lanterns, and so forth) are incapable of brightening the area, as are light spells of level 3 or lower. Higher level light spells are not affected by darkness.
Lastly, while everyone else within this area of darkness also gains concealment, you ignore the concealment they gain from the darkness you create. However, you must still roll for miss chance from any other effects that give them concealment.

Freez’n’fire It Up
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 3
Prerequisite: One Pungeon Pendragon maneuver
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Range: Melee

As an enemy attacks you, you shout quick words in Truespeech to tell him to stop.

Make a Truespeak check. The enemy attacking you must make a Will save with a DC equal to your Truespeak check result or be subjected to an effect mimicking the hold person spell for one round, taking 1d4 cold damage when you use this maneuver and 1d4 fire damage when the hold person effect stops (but not if it is ended prematurely somehow). You are still subjected to the attack.

Pay Back in Mind
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 3
Prerequisite: One Pungeon Pendragon maneuver
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: 100 ft

You glare at one of your foes who just attacked you and your allies. How dare he! But keeping your tongue still, the words still form in your mind and the mystical power takes effect as your foe suddenly growls in pain.

You can make a Truespeak check against an enemy that dealt damage to you or an ally of yours in the last round, DC equal to your target’s touch AC + 10. You deal 5d6 points of damage to the target. You may boost this damage by 1d6 more damage by willingly taking 1d8 damage yourself (this bypasses any damage reduction you have). If the target dealt enough damage to make your ally drop, you can add 1d6 more damage for each 1d8 damage you willingly take, with no limit. However, you become dazed for 1 round for each 1d6 damage you add beyond the first.

Truelepathic Interfearance
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 3
Prerequisite: One Pungeon Pendragon maneuver
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Range: 30 ft

Seeing one of your allies in trouble, you utter words of power beyond those spellcasters know to come to his aid.

You can use this maneuver if you or an ally is affected by poison or fear. You can make a Truespeak check with the DC being the DC of the poison or the fear effect to negate it. You can use this for both the primary and secondary effects of the poison. If you use this maneuver to remove a fear effect that affects yourself, you get a -10 penalty on the Truespeak check. You can also use this maneuver to make a DC 18 Truespeak check to ignore a caltrop wound.

4th level
Fare Trade
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 4
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee attack

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth and the whole world resolves around the trade of the warrior.

You make a Truespeak check and deal extra damage depending on your relationship with the target. Furthermore, if you are currently affected by a disease or poison, you may release it from your body and instead inflict it upon your target. Just Met: You have no relationship with the target. DC is 15, you deal 1d6 extra damage to the target. Examples include a guard at a castle or a traveler on the road.
Acquaintance (Negative): Someone you have met several times with no real positive experiences. DC is 18, you deal 2d6 extra damage to the target. Example: A town guard that has arrested you for drunkenness once or twice.
Enemy: Someone on an opposed team, but with whom you have no personal relationship. DC is 24, you deal 3d6 extra damage to the target. Example: A cleric of a philosophically-opposed religion or an orc bandit who is robbing you.
Personal Foe: Someone with whom you have a regularly antagonistic personal relationship. DC is 28, you deal 4d6 extra damage to the target. Example: An evil warlord whom you are attempting to thwart, or a bounty hunter who is tracking you down for your crimes.
Nemesis: Someone who has sworn to do you, personally, harm. DC is 34, you deal 5d6 extra damage to the target. Example: The brother of a man you murdered in cold blood.Descriptions of relationships taken from here (http://www.giantitp.com/articles/jFppYwv7OUkegKhONNF.html).

Pun Fursonified
Pungeon Pendragon (Boost)
Level: XX??!! 4
Prerequisites: Two Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Personal

Animals have humour too, y’know. It says so in all those fancy lil’ fables me mum used ta tell me. I liked them fables, y’know. Had quite a number of foxy ladies in it, though also a big number of bitches. The great many chicks made up for it though! But there was also this huuuuuge… rooster.

Choose before you roll what kind of effect you wish to accomplish: a bonus to either your Str, Dex, Con or AC. Make a Truespeak check. If you chose Str, Dex or Con, you gain a +2 bonus if your check result is higher than 15. This bonus increases to +4 if your check result is higher than 25 and it increases to +6 if your check result is higher than 35. If you chose your AC, you gain a +1 natural armour bonus to your AC if your result is 15. This bonus increases by +1 for every 5 points your check is higher than 15 (+2 at 20, +3 at 25, etc) for a maximum of +5. Also, no matter the effect you chose, you grow a small amount of fur on your body (the colour and pattern of which tends to be the same as that of an animal known for the quality of the effect you chose).

We Chappy Few
Pungeon Pendragon (Stance)
Level: XX??!! 4
Prerequisites: Two Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: 60 ft
Duration: Stance

Inspired by great works of word and the great language of Truespeech, you become an orator who boosts the morale of your allies, spurning them to become better fighters for your cause.

You can give your allies within range one of the following benefits. You don’t gain these benefits yourself. You can change the benefits this stance gives as a swift action. Resist the wounds: Your words reinforce the bodies of your allies, strengthening them against attacks and healing their wounds. They gain damage reduction 1/- and fast healing 1. At initiator level 11 you also grant them the ability to only take half damage when they take nonlethal damage.
Shun the magic: Your words strengthen your allies and protect them from magic and other unwanted effects. They gain spell resistance 5 + your initiator level, as well as a +1 bonus on Fort, Reflex or Will saves (choose one).
My words protect you: Your words almost literally form a shield around your allies. They gain sonic resistance 10 and anyone attacking an affected ally with a natural attack or non-reach melee weapon takes 1 sonic damage.
Charge the enemy: Your words spurn your allies to attack your foes with haste. They gain a +2 bonus on all damage rolls and +5 ft movement speed.
Foresee the openings: Your allies’ senses become honed in a manner that is almost precognitive. They gain a +1 bonus on all attack rolls and AC.
Beware the sounds: Your allies become more aware of the sounds around them and what they say, as well as what is said to them. They gain a +1 bonus on Wis-based and Cha-based skill checks as well as a +1 bonus on Initiative checks.

5th level
Molon Labe!
Pungeon Pendragon (Boost)
Level: XX??!! 5
Prerequisites: Two Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Personal

So your enemy told you to surrender your weapons. You politely told them to put theirs “up theres”.

You gain protection from ranged attacks: any attack that requires a ranged attack roll (or ranged touch attack roll) against you deals 10 points less damage. Furthermore, you must make a Truespeak check. For every 5 points by which your roll exceeds 10, you gain a +1 shield bonus to AC that stacks with itself (+1 at 15, +2 at 20, etc). Furthermore, you can designate one enemy at the time you use this maneuver. You gain a dodge bonus to AC against any attacks this enemy makes against you. This dodge bonus is equal to the shield bonus this maneuver gives you. This effect remains until the end of the encounter. If you use this boost again, the new use replaces the old one.

Ow, My Puncreas!
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 5
Prerequisites: One Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Target: Whomever attacked you

A Truespeech-filled grunt rolls out of your mouth in hurt from an attack and bounces against your aggressor, making her hurt as well.

As an immediate action immediately after being attacked and being dealt damage to, you can initiate this counter. Make a Truespeak check, DC 15 + your opponent’s HD. If you succeed, your opponent takes 1d4 Con damage or 1d4 Cha damage (choose either).

Survivalar Evolution
Pungeon Pendragon (Stance)
Level: XX??!! 5
Prerequisites: Three Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Personal
Duration: Stance

You continuously murmur the words Truespeech has whispered into your brain and become able to use methods of survival known since ancient times.

You cannot attack while in this stance, but you gain a +3 bonus on all saves, as well as Heal and Survival checks. You also gain DR 5/- and Uncanny Dodge (which becomes Improved Uncanny Dodge if you already has Uncanny Dodge). During combat, you gain Mettle and Evasion, but if you already have either of these, you do not gain the improved version.

Three Times’ the Harm
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 5
Prerequisites: Two Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee attack or ranged attack within 30 ft

Going at it with your faith put into your own luck, you shout three things you assume will hurt your opponent’s ego. Bam! Now he’s actually hurt, too!

Make three Truespeak checks against your targets AC. If only one check is equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d4 extra damage for every 15 points of your other two Truespeak checks (so 2d4 if both Truespeak checks were 15 or higher, but not more than 29). If two checks are equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d6 extra damage for every 15 points of your highest and your lowest two Truespeak checks. If all checks are equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d8 extra damage for every 15 points of your two highest Truespeak checks.

6th level
Crave Misteak
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 6
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Range: Melee attack

In Truespeech you give a retort to your enemy, telling them it was all useless, but their attack was a tasty attempt nonetheless.

When an enemy attacks you, you can make an attack roll. If your attack roll is higher than your enemy’s, you parry their attack and may immediately attack them twice right after it - both attack rolls take a -2 penalty. For every 5 points of damage you deal, you gain 1 temporary hit point that lasts until the end of the encounter.

Purricane of Huns
Pungeon Pendragon (Boost)
Level: XX??!! 6
Prerequisites: Four Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Personal
Duration: See text

Sometimes, animals aren’t fun. Sometimes, they’re just plain animalistic. And sometimes, you do too. You tend to find it quite the party though, a real bestival. And you roar! And then there’s more. Of you. To party.

You let out a primal roar that reverberates through the layers of reality as you not so much speak the words of Truespeech but let them cry freely from your throat, like an animal that learnt to speak that very strange tongue. Make a Truespeak check. The DC is 15 + your character level. If you succeed, you create a copy of yourself with only 1 hp, who can only die from hp damage, but otherwise exactly the same as yourself. Your copy appears within 5 ft of you. You and your copies both fly into a rage as a first level barbarian. If you have levels in barbarian, you may use it at that level instead. If your Truespeak check succeeds by 10 points or more, you create one extra copy, for a total of two copies. If your Truespeak check succeeds by 20 points or more, you create another extra copy, for a total of three copies. All copies fly into a rage. The rage lasts only for 1 + your improved Con mod rounds. At the end of their rage, your copies dissipate.
You and all your copies grow whiskey-flavoured whiskers when you initiate this maneuver.

Shanks for the Memories
Pungeon Pendragon (Counter)
Level: XX??!! 6
Initiation Action: One immediate action
Range: Melee attack

With a sharp word and a sharper blade, you go right for where it hurts in revenge! Yowch!

Immediately after being attacked, you attack right back in retaliation. If your attack hits and deals damage, the opponent becomes flat-footed until his next turn. Allies that threaten your attacker get attacks of opportunity against him.

7th level
Eternal Soliloquy
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 7
Prerequisites: Four Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One full action

You begin a soliloquy detailing your way of life and insulting and looking down on that of a particular enemy of yours with words that words are quite a smack, rather piercing, or just plain cutting remarks. What you say can sound quite acidic to the ears of others, or just shocking. You can deliver your lines coldly or with heated passion.

Upon initiating this maneuver, you must designate one enemy within 60 feet of you. Time speeds up for you and the designated enemy compared to the rest of the world, as if you were both affected by time stop (http://www.systemreferencedocuments.org/resources/systems/pennpaper/dnd35/soveliorsage/spellsTtoZ.html#time-stop). The difference though is that you can still harm the designated enemy, or move objects held by him, but he can do the same to you. Furthermore, during this time, you cannot make attacks as normal (nor cast offensive spells or summon creatures, but you can still cast other spells). Instead, you can make one Truespeak checks per round of apparent time for every 5 points of BAB you have (maximum 4 at BAB+16 or higher) as a full attack, or one Truespeak checks as a standard action. You deal damage equal to your check result, half of which is bludgeoning/piercing/slashing damage (choose one), the other half being acid/cold/electricity/fire damage (choose one).
Your opponent can still move and act as normal and may attack you as normal, though otherwise the time stop effect affects him normally.

I came, I saw, I Concorde
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 7
Initiation Action: One full action
Range: Melee attack

Veni…! Vidi…! Superfastcannottouchmeyousillymonkeybastardsstrike tothesolarplexus!

Quick on your feet, you run towards an enemy to strike them, then quickly run away from them again. This maneuver functions like Spring Attack, where you may move, attack, and then finish your move. For this turn your movement increases by 30 feet (this is an enhancement bonus), and instead of making a single attack as normal during a Spring Attack, you may make an additional melee attack at your full BAB. You receive a +1 bonus on attack rolls and a +1 dodge bonus to AC against attacks of opportunity during your round.

It’s a Punderful World
Pungeon Pendragon
Level: XX??!! 7
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: 50 ft
Duration: 2 rounds

Softly singing in Truespeech your voice becomes accompanied by the sound of an ethereal ukulele.

Using the power of the language that existed at the beginning of time, your words punch through the fabrics of reality that have been created since then. You may add or take away certain planar traits to the area around you, as detailed below: Gravity: You may change the gravity in the area from or to normal gravity, heavy gravity or light gravity. You cannot add gravity to a gravity-less plane, nor can you change objective gravity to subjective gravity, nor vice versa.
Time: You may change the way time flows in the area from or to normal time, flowing time or timeless. You cannot change this if the plane has erratic time. If you choose flowing time, you may choose for it to flow at a difference of 1 day : 1 round or 1 day : 1 hour or the opposite.
Morphic: You may change the ways the area can be altered to and from alterable morphic, divinely morphic and static.
Elemental and Energy: You may change the elemental and energy traits of the plane in the area, making the area air-, earth-, fire-, negative-, positive- or water-dominant. You may choose up to three of these traits, but they may not oppose one another. This means that in a water-dominant plane you could create a fire-dominant area where the water-dominant trait is nullified for the duration of the effect. You can only make the area major positive- or negative-dominant if you willingly lessen the duration to 1 round.
Alignment: You may change the alignment traits of the plane to fit any possible combination (nine in total). You can only make the area strongly-aligned to any of the alignments if you willingly lessen the duration to 1 round. You cannot add alignment traits that are opposite of your alignment, but you can take them away.
Magic: You may change the magic traits within the area to and from normal magic or dead magic.

8th level
Hypurrcane of Puns
Pungeon Pendragon (Stance)
Level: XX??!! 8
Prerequisite: Four Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Personal
Duration: Stance

Shouting and mumbling and babbling semi-coherently your Truespeech seems almost garbled while you speak so fast it is totally abnormal.

You defy gravity while in this stance, becoming able to choose any surface you stand on to be ‘down’ for you. You gain a +10 bonus on Jump checks and can walk on water and surfaces that are otherwise not enough to hold your weight. Furthermore, you act as if affected by haste (http://www.systemreferencedocuments.org/resources/systems/pennpaper/dnd35/soveliorsage/spellsHtoL.html#haste) (which further increases your Jump checks).

Pun-punk
Pungeon Pendragon
Level: XX??!! 8
Prerequisites: Three Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One swift action
Range: Melee attack or ranged attack within 30 ft

With the language before time you summon a weapon to your hand to attack after which it disappears ago.

You summon a weapon to your hand from another world. It may be any weapon possible, even one that is not appropriate for your culture or time or even your world (such as a revolver in a medieval setting, a rapier in an oriental setting or a raygun in an anti-technology setting). Make a Truespeak check. If the result is 10, the weapon gains a +1 enhancement bonus. For each 5 points by which your check exceeds 10, you may increase the enhancement bonus by 1 or give the weapon a magic (or psionic) quality of an equal bonus. You can’t give the weapon an enhancement bonus greater than +5 and enhancement bonus and magic qualities cannot exceed a combined enhancement bonus of +10, as normal for non-epic magic weapons. You can make a single or a full attack with the weapon, but it disappears at the end of your turn.
Weapons that are out-of-place or out-of-time may require DM approval first, mostly in the case of far-future weapons, due to their greater power than other weapons.

Pundemonium
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 8
Prerequisites: Two Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One standard action
Range: Melee attack

With a mixture of words you weave together, you try to accomplish two effects at once whilst simultaneously striking at your foe.

You make a melee attack as normal. If you hit, you must make two Truespeak checks. The target must make a Fort save with a DC equal to the result of the first check and a Will save with a DC equal to the result of the second check. If the target fails his Fort save, he is petrified for 1d10+3 rounds. If the target fails his Will save, he is confused for 1d10+3 rounds.
If the attack doesn’t hit, you may make a Truespeak check. The target must make a Reflex save with a DC equal to the result of this check. If he fails, continue with the rest of the maneuver as the words still affect your target even in spite of your attack failing, but reduce the amount of rounds the target is petrified to 4.

9th level
Crowning Moment of Punny/Pawsome
Pungeon Pendragon (Strike)
Level: XX??!! 9
Prerequisites: Four Pungeon Pendragon maneuvers
Initiation Action: One full-round action
Save: Fort partial (see text)

You begin blurting out Truespeech seemingly almost randomly and madly as you rave across the battlefield towards an enemy, your eyes deadset on your target, but yet dodging and weaving your way through all that stands between you.

During this maneuver, you can move up to three times your movement speed towards an enemy. If you need to make any skill checks on the way (Balance, Climb, Jump, Tumble, Swim, etc.) you may instead substitute a Truespeak check with the same DC. The words of Truespeech affect you supernaturally and cause you to overcome such physical limitations you otherwise have. You may move any which way you want as long as you end your movement at a viable target. Any enemies on the way that are a threat to you or your allies you may attack with a single strike at full BAB, though, because you move so fast and have your sights set on the final enemy, any variable numerical values that factor in your damage dealt to anyone you attack in this manner are minimized (all damage dice rolled effectively are 1s). Once you reach your final target, you may make a single attack against him for which you may substitute a Truespeak check. You deal 1d6 bonus damage for every 10 foot you moved to reach the enemy. Furthermore, the enemy is knocked back 5 ft for every 10 ft of movement you had left. He can make a Fort save (DC 10 + 1/2 initiator level + Str mod) to negate the knockback effect.
Knocking the enemy back this way may have additional effects depending on the surroundings.

[Morph Bark]

What, over a hundred views and none with anything to comment on either the concept, flavour or mechanics of any of the maneuvers already up here? Fur shame!

[The-Mage-King]

We're sorry, but it hurts too much to look at this to critique it. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IncrediblyLamePun)


Is what I expect you to want to hear about it... Good work, making Truespeak useful. Though I wonder about the balance of the last one, considering swordsages can get an obscene AC fairly easily, and multiclassing is optimal...

[Morph Bark]

We're sorry, but it hurts too much to look at this to critique it. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IncrediblyLamePun)


Is what I expect you to want to hear about it... Good work, making Truespeak useful. Though I wonder about the balance of the last one, considering swordsages can get an obscene AC fairly easily, and multiclassing is optimal...

Obviously you mean you can't be too critical, or else it would hurt too much. :smalltongue:

But yes. I thought... "hey, here's a skill left unused for martial disciplines, and none too useful so far, let's have a go at it!" And that's true I suppose... perhaps I should alter duration or effect somewhat.

[Morph Bark]

Updated. All 1st- to 4th-level maneuvers are now up, as well as one 7th-level maneuver.

[Morph Bark]

Added a picture, as well as another fifth-level stance.

Noone besides me (and TMK) has interest in martial-based Truenaming? Odd.

[Dead_Jester]

Survivalar Evolution needs clarifiction, because the list states that it makes you incapable of attacks, but the actual ability gives you a bonus to attacks using improvised weapons.

Puny Man's Defiance, Alea Iacta Est and Fightin' Shade all have similar problems, with the first stating in the list that it grants a bonus to attack (which it doesn't), the second stating that it can grant additional effects (which aren't stated) and the third stating that the darkness doesn't affect you, something that the maneuver clearly contradicts.

Pay Back in Mind is too expensive in HP, and should probably be 1d8 for 1d6 with no dazing if you want anyone to actually use the empowerment.

Eternal Soliloquy needs to specify if the opponent can also do Truespeak checks, and if they get some sort of bonus based on hit dice or CR (which they should, because between 8 and 20 times your skill result for a maxed-out skill in damage against an enemy that can only do a negligible amount of damage is definitely overpowered).

We Chappy Few's Shun the Magic should give a Sr of 10+initiator level, or 10+half level+Int modifier if you want it to do anything. Again, the list description doesn't match with the actual maneuver.

Apart from those small nitpicks, the discipline looks pretty good, and I congratulate you on finding so many puns.

[Morph Bark]

Survivalar Evolution needs clarifiction, because the list states that it makes you incapable of attacks, but the actual ability gives you a bonus to attacks using improvised weapons.

Fixed. I typed up the list first so that I have a few ideas ahead before working them out, but forgot to check with it when adding the bit about improvised weapons.


Puny Man's Defiance, Alea Iacta Est and Fightin' Shade all have similar problems, with the first stating in the list that it grants a bonus to attack (which it doesn't), the second stating that it can grant additional effects (which aren't stated) and the third stating that the darkness doesn't affect you, something that the maneuver clearly contradicts.

Alea Iacta Est fixed. Originally I wanted one of the outcomes to be a 1d20 roll for a randomized effect, but in the end that seemed too awkward with the rest. Plus, the extra damage was much higher. (Using all possible dice, from 1d4 to 1d12 for damage and 1d20 for the effect.)

Puny Man's Defiance fixed.

Fightin' Shade fixed. I meant the initiator of the effect ignored the concealment others gained from it. Sorry about that.


Pay Back in Mind is too expensive in HP, and should probably be 1d8 for 1d6 with no dazing if you want anyone to actually use the empowerment.

Changed to 1d6 for 1d8, dazing kept but changed slightly.


Eternal Soliloquy needs to specify if the opponent can also do Truespeak checks, and if they get some sort of bonus based on hit dice or CR (which they should, because between 8 and 20 times your skill result for a maxed-out skill in damage against an enemy that can only do a negligible amount of damage is definitely overpowered).

Well, the opponent and the initiator can still move around and the opponent can still use magic and attacks as normal. An opponent of appropriate CR could still do nasty things to the initiator I would presume.


We Chappy Few's Shun the Magic should give a Sr of 10+initiator level, or 10+half level+Int modifier if you want it to do anything. Again, the list description doesn't match with the actual maneuver.

I'd prefer keeping it at just 10, or maybe up it to 15, because the other effects also don't depend on initiator level. Or do you think all of them should depend on initiator level?


Apart from those small nitpicks, the discipline looks pretty good, and I congratulate you on finding so many puns.

Thank you for looking over the discipline and pointing out my mistakes. I'm glad the puns so far aren't groan-inducing. :smallsmile:

[Dead_Jester]

Well, the opponent and the initiator can still move around and the opponent can still use magic and attacks as normal. An opponent of appropriate CR could still do nasty things to the initiator I would presume.

Sorry, the way I read it, the opponent also couldn't do any attacks, but if he can use is normal abilities, then it's fine.


I'd prefer keeping it at just 10, or maybe up it to 15, because the other effects also don't depend on initiator level. Or do you think all of them should depend on initiator level?

The thing is, you have to remember that to penetrate spell resistance, the casters rolls 1d20+his caster level, so the SR has to scale or it becomes useless, or at least start much higher (maybe 20), even than, from levels 11 onward, it is almost useless.


Thank you for looking over the discipline and pointing out my mistakes. I'm glad the puns so far aren't groan-inducing. :smallsmile:

No problem, and as for the puns, their always fun to see.

[Morph Bark]

Clarified Eternal Soliloquy some and changed We Chappy Few. SR granted is now 10+1/2 initiator level, which still will make it completely useless at level 20, but at least not as early as level 10. Also added the following to resist the wounds on We Chappy Few: "At initiator level 11 you also grant them the ability to only take half damage when they take nonlethal damage."

[Debihuman]

This looks fun. I'm not sure I'd ever use it but it would be a hoot to try.

Just one question:

6th level
Purricane of Huns: Boost−Create copies of yourself who, along with yourself, fly into a rage. Grow whiskeys.

Did you mean whiskey like the drink or whiskers like the beard? Even the women?

Debby

[Morph Bark]

Did you mean whiskey like the drink or whiskers like the beard? Even the women?

Debby

That was meant to be a pun. They'd grow alcohol-soaked whiskers.

Especially for the women. Catfight, anyone?

[Debihuman]

Apparently, I am am pun impaired. Either that, or my knowledge of Huns is woefully inadequate.

Ya know, some Dwarves dig bearded women. A few delicately placed cat-like whiskers for the catgirls wouldn't be so awful. On the other hand, this ain't attractive to anyone (I hope):


http://www.freakingnews.com/pictures/31500/Shania-Twain-Beard--31652.jpg

Debby

[Morph Bark]

Of course whiskers =/= beard here. But what you said might have me make dwarves in my campaign setting have an unusual attraction to catfolk...

Anyway, all maneuvers are now up, except for the ninth-level one!

[Danzig]

Not really sure if I'd use this discipline, since I really hate puns. Don't feel sore about it though, I don't like Falling Anvil either (not into corny humor in gaming)

That said, it looks well written and balanced. If I ever ran a campaign in a bizarre Alice-in-Wonderland kind of setting, I might find a use for this and Falling Anvil. Unfortunately, my settings are usually rather grim and serious. I will, however, bookmark this in case I decide to run a twisted lunatic dreamscape setting.

Also, aside from not liking puns, great flavouring. A lot of this would leave those on the receiving end scratching their heads and going "Wha?"

[Morph Bark]

Bumped to receive further PEACHing by request and reply to last post.


That said, it looks well written and balanced. If I ever ran a campaign in a bizarre Alice-in-Wonderland kind of setting, I might find a use for this and Falling Anvil. Unfortunately, my settings are usually rather grim and serious. I will, however, bookmark this in case I decide to run a twisted lunatic dreamscape setting.

Also, aside from not liking puns, great flavouring. A lot of this would leave those on the receiving end scratching their heads and going "Wha?"

Alice in Wonderland (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=175194), eh? :smallbiggrin:

Thanks anyway, I'm glad you like the flavouring. The puns really only made their way in just before I got this up here; the foundation was already there.

[Havvy]

In "Hypurrcane of Puns", there is no need to force a recheck each round. As an 8th level ability, it matches up appropriately with magic.


It’s a Punderful World: Add plainer traits to the area surrounding you.

What type of maneuver is this? Affecting the time and magic traits makes this a bit too powerful. Especially since the only reason you'd use it is to speed up time or kill magic. A stance without a duration would work better for this...


You establish a mental link with all allies within 50 feet of you that are willing. You cannot communicate with them through this link, but you become able to understand and speak any language that those you link with can. You gain a +1 bonus on attack rolls for every two languages you become capable of speaking through this stance (minimum +1; you don't gain this bonus for languages you already knew).

The problem is not that the bonus per language is too high, but rather that you have an ability that scales based on how many allies you have and it makes it harmful for you to learn languages yourself. Not to mention, it isn't hard to get followers who know lots of languages and then use them to power yourself up to over +20 on your attack roll, no matter how many bonus languages you need. While the idea is clever, it just fails mathematically.


Make a Truespeak check. If your result is at least 10, you gain 1d6 bonus damage on your attack if you hit. For each 10 points by which your check result exceeds 10 you gain an additional 1d6 bonus damage.

Would be more concise as:


As part of your attack, make a Truespeak check. You deal an extra 1d6 damage for each 10 points on this check.


If you use this maneuver as a boost (swift action) a Bluff or Perform check you or a designated ally uses in the same round gains a +4 bonus.

You need a comma after "(swift action)". Why not make this all Bluff or Perform checks instead of only one?


Make a Truespeak check. You take a -5 penalty on this check. The spellcaster must make a Concentration check with a DC equal to your Truespeak check result or fail in the casting of his spell. The spellcaster receives a bonus to his Concentration check for every language he knows.


The target must make a Concentration check opposed by your Truespeak check or fail in casting the spell. The target receives a +1 bonus to his Concentration check for every language he knows.

If you think the removal of the -5 penalty on this refactor upsets balance, double the bonus to the concentration check. There is no need to give both yourself a penalty and the target a bonus, except to create more details to remember.


Make a Truespeak check. The enemy attacking you must make a Will save with a DC equal to your Truespeak check result or be subjected to an effect mimicking the hold person spell for one round, taking 1d4 cold damage when you use this maneuver and 1d4 fire damage when the hold person effect stops (but not if it is ended prematurely somehow). You are still subjected to the attack.

One of the most important pieces to this ability is tagged at the end, when it should be at the beginning. Also, how does this work with full round attacks?


Upon being struck by an attack, you make a Truespeak check. After the attack is finished, the attacker must make a Will save with a DC equal to your Truespeak check. If the attacker fails, it takes 1d4 cold damage and is under the effect of the hold person spell for one round. At the end of the [i]hold person[i] spell, the attacker takes 1d4 fire damage, unless ended prematurely.

Though I'm not too happy with this refactor myself...


Also, no matter the effect you chose, you grow a small amount of fur on your body (the colour and pattern of which tends to be the same as that of an animal known for the quality of the effect you chose).

This should be in the flavor text of the ability, since it does not seem to have a mechanical effect associated with it.


Shun the magic: Your words strengthen your allies and protect them from magic and other unwanted effects. They gain spell resistance 10 + 1/2 your initiator level, as well as a +1 bonus on Fort, Reflex or Will saves (choose one).

Mechanically, this gets weaker as you gain in levels. 5 or 7 + imitator level would keep it working better. I'd suggest 5+ since is affects all allies. A +1 bonus to one save is below the 'we should care about this bonus' threshold. Either make it +2 to 1 or a +1 to all three.


Charge the enemy: Your words spurn your allies to attack your foes with haste. They gain a +2 bonus on all damage rolls and +5 ft movement speed.
Foresee the openings: Your allies’ senses become honed in a manner that is almost precognitive. They gain a +1 bonus on all attack rolls and AC.

The damage roll, attack roll, and AC bonuses need to be typed. I suggest insight for the attack roll and AC bonus. I see Charge the enemy being used for fleeing more than I see it being used in battle (more a Charge away from the enemy. :smallwink:)


You gain protection from ranged attacks: any attack that requires a ranged attack roll (or ranged touch attack roll) against you deals 10 points less damage. Furthermore, you must make a Truespeak check. For every 5 points by which your roll exceeds 10, you gain a +1 shield bonus to AC that stacks with itself (+1 at 15, +2 at 20, etc). Furthermore, you can designate one enemy at the time you use this maneuver. You gain a dodge bonus to AC against any attacks this enemy makes against you. This dodge bonus is equal to the shield bonus this maneuver gives you.

What is the duration of this ability? One round? There is no need to make the bonus a dodge bonus, unless you expect the user to have a shield that cannot be made redundant with this ability. Made it so that no matter what, you get a +1 shield bonus in the refactor.


Ranged attacks, including ranged touch attacks, deal 10 less damage against you. Furthermore, you gain a shield bonus that starts at +1 and increases by +1 for every 5 points you exceed 15 on a Truespeak check. As part of initiating this maneuver, designate one enemy. Your shield bonus from this maneuver is doubled against that enemy.


You gain a +2 bonus on all saves, as well as Heal and Survival checks. You also gain DR 5/- and Uncanny Dodge (which becomes Improved Uncanny Dodge if you already has Uncanny Dodge). During combat, you gain Mettle and Evasion, but if you already have either of these, you do not gain the improved version. However, you cannot attack while in this stance.

If you want to survive, the save bonus should be doubled. Noting that you cannot attack in this stance should be placed first, not last. A speed bonus would be helpful here (+10 ft bonus to base land speed). Really, you lose a lot of power in losing the ability to attack, so it should be countered by something.



Make three Truespeak checks against your targets AC. If only one check is equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d4 extra damage for every 15 points of your other two Truespeak checks (so 2d4 if both Truespeak checks were 15 or higher, but not more than 29). If two checks are equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d6 extra damage for every 15 points of your highest and your lowest two Truespeak checks. If all checks are equal to or higher than your target’s AC, you hit and deal 1d8 extra damage for every 15 points of your two highest Truespeak checks.

This is too confusing to memorize (or understand it without studying). There is no way I could use the ability without looking it up. Simplify it.


When an enemy attacks you, you can make an attack roll. If your attack roll is higher than your enemy’s, you parry their attack and may attack them twice right after it (you need to make seperate attack rolls for this, which both take a -2 penalty). For every 5 points of damage you deal, you gain 1 temporary hit point that lasts until the end of the encounter (or until lost from taking damage of course).

Looks nice, so only deserves a wording refactoring. Be nice if Truespeech actually played an important part here, flavorwise. The parts in parenthesis are either redundant (temp HP rules) or key mechanics that should not be in parenthesis. Ideally, nothing should be in parenthesis in a paragraph of rules.


When an enemy attack you, you may parry the blow. Roll an attack roll opposed by your enemy's attack roll. If you succeed, you parry and may make two free attacks against the enemy, both at a -2 penalty. For every 5 points of damage dealt, you gain 1 temporary hit point that lasts until the end of the encounter.


You let out a primal roar that reverberates through the layers of reality as you not so much speak the words of Truespeech but let them cry freely from your throat, like an animal that learnt to speak that very strange tongue. Make a Truespeak check. The DC is 15 + your character level. If you succeed, you create a copy of yourself with only 1 hp, who can only die from direct combat, but otherwise exactly the same as yourself. Your copy appears within 5 ft of you. You and your copy both fly into a rage (as a 1st-level barbarian, unless you have more than 1 level in that class). If your Truespeak check succeeds by 10 points or more, you create one extra copy, for a total of two copies. If your Truespeak check succeeds by 20 points or more, you create another extra copy, for a total of three copies. All copies fly into a rage. The rage lasts only for 1 + your improved Con mod rounds. At the end of their rage, your copies die.

Why does the DC scale with level? Also, why must you even make one to get any affect out of this? The clones not dying from falling damage, environmental damage, indirect combat (fireball counts as this), and whatnot seems weird. The barbarian rage can be rewritten as:

"You and your copies both fly into a rage as a first level barbarian. If you have levels in barbarian, you may use it at that level instead."

The extra clones should be described with the first clone. The copies should dissipate, not die, at the end of this maneuver. Unless you want them to remain around materially, which then becomes an open economy exploit.

Shanks for the Memories is underpowered...by a couple levels...it also breaks the rules on one gender being better than another...

Pun Punk: Anybody can make a DC 10 check at that level. Anybody can make a DC 20 check by that point. Raise the DCs to compensate. Technically you don't get an attack with it, so I reworded (during the to-wiki transfer, not during this post) it to allow it.


You summon a weapon to your hand from another world. It may be any weapon possible, even one that is not appropriate for your culture or time or even your world. Examples include a revolver in a medieval setting, a rapier in an oriental setting or a raygun in an anti-technology setting. Make a Truespeak check. If the result is 10, the weapon gains a +1 enhancement bonus. For each 5 points by which your check exceeds 10, you may increase the enhancement bonus by 1 or give the weapon a magic (or psionic) quality of an equal bonus. You can’t give the weapon an enhancement bonus greater than +5 and enhancement bonus and magic qualities cannot exceed a combined enhancement bonus of +10, as normal for non-epic magic weapons. You can make a single or a full attack with the weapon, but it disappears at the end of your turn. Weapons that are out-of-place or out-of-time may require DM approval first, mostly in the case of far-future weapons, due to their greater power than other weapons.

Eternal Soliloquy: I use this on my ally and have him run away to safety while I don't attack him. Also, Time Stop is a game breaking ability even at 9th level spells. Giving it as a 7th level maneuver, which can be used per-encounter at minimum, is bad. And giving it to your enemy is just a trap if the enemy is smart.

I came, I saw, I concorde This has the exact opposite issues as Eternal Soliloquy. It's a spring attack, as a 7th level maneuver. Really?

[Morph Bark]

In "Hypurrcane of Puns", there is no need to force a recheck each round. As an 8th level ability, it matches up appropriately with magic.

Changed that.


What type of maneuver is this? Affecting the time and magic traits makes this a bit too powerful. Especially since the only reason you'd use it is to speed up time or kill magic. A stance without a duration would work better for this...

You can't speed up or slow down time with it. However, I see the point on the magic. Perhaps changing it so that all allies within range gain 15 + your initiator level SR would do?

Also, the type of maneuver is similar to Shadow Jaunt from Shadow Hand. I don't recall what it was classified as, but if I am correct it was neither a strike, nor a boost, nor a counter.


The problem is not that the bonus per language is too high, but rather that you have an ability that scales based on how many allies you have and it makes it harmful for you to learn languages yourself. Not to mention, it isn't hard to get followers who know lots of languages and then use them to power yourself up to over +20 on your attack roll, no matter how many bonus languages you need. While the idea is clever, it just fails mathematically.

I'll change it to a connection with a single ally and let it count your own languages as well.


If you think the removal of the -5 penalty on this refactor upsets balance, double the bonus to the concentration check. There is no need to give both yourself a penalty and the target a bonus, except to create more details to remember.

Decided to remove it. The truenaming I tend to use is Kyeudo's fix, so I should have made the bonus a +1 per TWO languages known, but eh, there's no reason a spellcaster would be so easily able to defend himself against it, even with a lot of lingual know-how. Even if you were to "correct" the arcane grammar in a faulty way, you'd still throw the spellcaster off his guard.


Also, how does this work with full round attacks?

Freez'n'Fire it up comes after the first attack.


Mechanically, this gets weaker as you gain in levels. 5 or 7 + imitator level would keep it working better. I'd suggest 5+ since is affects all allies. A +1 bonus to one save is below the 'we should care about this bonus' threshold. Either make it +2 to 1 or a +1 to all three.

Changed it to 5 + initiator levels. I had it too much like a supernatural ability as monsters do, hence the half, but looking it over, not fitting indeed.


The damage roll, attack roll, and AC bonuses need to be typed. I suggest insight for the attack roll and AC bonus.

Bonuses from most maneuvers are untyped for as far as I can remember.


I see Charge the enemy being used for fleeing more than I see it being used in battle (more a Charge away from the enemy. :smallwink:)

It's called advancing in the opposite direction. :smallwink:


What is the duration of this ability? One round? There is no need to make the bonus a dodge bonus, unless you expect the user to have a shield that cannot be made redundant with this ability. Made it so that no matter what, you get a +1 shield bonus in the refactor.

Added duration, kept the rest.


If you want to survive, the save bonus should be doubled. Noting that you cannot attack in this stance should be placed first, not last. A speed bonus would be helpful here (+10 ft bonus to base land speed). Really, you lose a lot of power in losing the ability to attack, so it should be countered by something.


This is too confusing to memorize (or understand it without studying). There is no way I could use the ability without looking it up. Simplify it.

I'll attempt to do so later if it requires a complete overhaul.


Looks nice, so only deserves a wording refactoring. Be nice if Truespeech actually played an important part here, flavorwise. The parts in parenthesis are either redundant (temp HP rules) or key mechanics that should not be in parenthesis. Ideally, nothing should be in parenthesis in a paragraph of rules.

Altered.


Why does the DC scale with level? Also, why must you even make one to get any affect out of this? The clones not dying from falling damage, environmental damage, indirect combat (fireball counts as this), and whatnot seems weird. The barbarian rage can be rewritten as:

"You and your copies both fly into a rage as a first level barbarian. If you have levels in barbarian, you may use it at that level instead."

The extra clones should be described with the first clone. The copies should dissipate, not die, at the end of this maneuver. Unless you want them to remain around materially, which then becomes an open economy exploit.

All understandable points. I changed it so the clones can only die from hp damage instead and used your wording for the rage.


For the other ones, I'll look into changing their level or altering their power a bit.

[Havvy]

Wow, how did I miss your response to this. I'm adding a template to all the disciplines at the wiki, and noticed that your discipline doesn't have any discipline weapons. Is this an oversight, or do you purposely have no weapons for them to use? It makes Blade Meditation a hard feat to take with this...

As for the Shadow Jaunt maneuver line...those are typeless which I didn't know existed when I gave the above critique.

Overall, a :smallsmile: from me.