Pair of Homebrew Spells (3.5) PEACH

[Viskocity]

Greetings, I have a couple of spells I was hoping to have critiqued by the more experienced homebrewers on this board. I know pretty much what I want them to do, but no idea what level they should be or how to write them up in RAW format. Any input appreciated. Keep in mind that this is from a player's perspective, not a DM's, and I haven't gotten the spells approved yet. Enjoy!

Virsconte's Vicious Visage
Essentially works like phantasmal killer, except without all the...killing. It creates an illusion inside the head of the subject which only they can see. Will save to disbelieve.

Greater Magic Jar (working title)
This one is a bit more tricky. It would work like magic jar, but instead of falling comatose, the caster's body moves into the space of the subject for the duration. They become incorporeal and invisible (?) but can be harmed as normal for such a creature. When the spell ends, the caster has a one round grace period, after which they become corporeal and visible, and are shunted out of the subject's square.

[arguskos]

Virsconte's Vicious Visage
Essentially works like phantasmal killer, except without all the...killing. It creates an illusion inside the head of the subject which only they can see. Will save to disbelieve.
Sooooo, nothing happens? :smallconfused: What's the point if they don't die? Phantasmal killer doesn't DO anything else.


Greater Magic Jar (working title)
This one is a bit more tricky. It would work like magic jar, but instead of falling comatose, the caster's body moves into the space of the subject for the duration. They become incorporeal and invisible (?) but can be harmed as normal for such a creature. When the spell ends, the caster has a one round grace period, after which they become corporeal and visible, and are shunted out of the subject's square.
...:smallconfused: So, ok, what happens is that the caster becomes incorporeal and tags along like a bad case of body odor? What... does that actually do, though? Does it still give the caster control over the subject's body? If so, then the spell just protects the caster's body, right?

Just trying to get a feel here.

[Temotei]

Name
School (Subschool) [Descriptor]
Level: Class Level
Components: V, S, M, F, DF, XP
Casting Time:
Range:
Target:
Duration:
Saving Throw:
Spell Resistance:

Use that format. It'll help immensely. Then describe the spells formally like they should be.

[Viskocity]

Sooooo, nothing happens? :smallconfused: What's the point if they don't die? Phantasmal killer doesn't DO anything else.


...:smallconfused: So, ok, what happens is that the caster becomes incorporeal and tags along like a bad case of body odor? What... does that actually do, though? Does it still give the caster control over the subject's body? If so, then the spell just protects the caster's body, right?

Just trying to get a feel here.

Sorry if this wasn't clear from the description. The idea with the first is that it acts like Major Image, except that it is only visible to the subject. Hence you could make an ally look like an enemy, create a wall that isn't there; all the usual illusion goodness.

For the second, you essentially eliminate the one big loose end of magic jar, aka having your comatose body lying around somewhere nearby at all times. This way, you could also travel from body to body. Additionally, you are not instakilled if your body is out of range when the spell ends.

[NakedCelt]

Oriental Adventures had a spell called possess which worked in much the way your "Greater Magic Jar" does. Only the caster's soul isn't tagging along incorporeally, it's inside the target's body. If I recall correctly, if the target is slain the caster's soul returns to its own body and the target's soul does whatever the souls of the dead usually do in your particular universe.

[Peregrine]

The level of vicious visage depends strongly on what it actually does to the target, mechanically speaking. Here's a suggested writeup. I've taken the use of the word "visage" to heart, as well as the comparison to phantasmal killer. (Your comparison to major image suggests something else entirely to me -- happy to help with that idea instead if it's really what you want!) I also tried to make it a little different from other fear spells (cause fear, scare, fear).

Virsconte's vicious visage
Illusion (Phantasm) [Fear, Mind-Affecting]
Level: Sor/Wiz 2
Components: V, S
Casting Time: 1 standard action
Range: Medium (100 ft. + 10 ft./level)
Target: One living creature
Duration: 1 round/level; see text
Saving Throw: Will disbelief, then Will partial; see text
Spell Resistance: Yes

This spell causes the target to believe that it sees a haunting figure that stalks it -- always just around the corner, glimpsed in the crowd, lurking at the very edge of vision. Whichever way it turns, the target sees this entity, its countenance dredged up from the most primordial fears of its own subconscious mind. This figure is a phantasm and exists only in the target's mind; the caster sees only a cloudy shape lurking beside the target.

If the target fails its initial Will save, it is frightened for 1 round per caster level as the phantasm continues to haunt it. Upon a successful Will save, the target recognises the figure as unreal; it is merely shaken for 1 round.

The phantasm is also distracting, and the target takes a -1 penalty to all attack rolls for 1 round/level. This is in addition to the penalties for being shaken or frightened. The target may make a second Will save to disregard the illusion entirely, if it succeeded in disbelieving it.

If the target of Virsconte's vicious visage succeeds in disbelieving the illusion and is wearing a helm of telepathy, the spell can be turned upon you. You must then disbelieve it or see a phantasm of your own terrible imagining. (The target need not make a second Will save in this instance.)