Several Silly Sealions Stuffed Seaweed Southward Swiftly (Or, Random Banter #143)

[Trobby]

Random Banter

Da' Rules

1. Spam. For the purposes of RB, one word posts are generally considered spam. Likewise, posts that are nothing but *actions like this* are also be considered spam. Remember that the quality of the post's content is much better than the speed of your response.

2. This isn't the Play by Post or Town forum, nor is it the Silly Message Board Games or Structured Games forum. Please avoid continuous roleplay or mock battles and fights such as the "competition for control of the universe".

3. If it's already a thread, don't bring it to RB. RB has such a huge range of subject matter even restricted to the little snippets that probably don't warrant their own thread, it doesn't need legitimate thread topics cluttering it up as well. The exception to this is to bring something that is off-topic from one thread, but on-topic for RB and the subject doesn't warrant a thread of its own.

4. Don't advertise other threads in RB. Just because these new threads move at speeds more appropriate to a message board than an IM session doesn't mean you need to come over to RB and brow beat people into posting in your latest brainchild.

5. Please don't post single line posts alerting us to your current status -- as in "I'm back." This is Random Banter, not "How to stalk Random GitP forum members."

6. Don't poke, kick or bump the thread. It will move at whatever pace it wants to. Also, please refrain from Captain Obvious comments akin to "My, the thread is fast today."

7. Random Banter can only be as good, or as entertaining, as you make it. Demands to be entertained will fall on deaf ears unless you can add something more meaningful to the conversation.

8. As this is a public forum, where the current topic is nicely recorded for you, and not a conversation where you could have missed the beginning, please refrain from asking something to the effect of "What's the topic?". Please take the time to read up a bit first.

9. Thread Creator must include the words "Random" and "Banter" as well as the thread #. Try to be concise as well.

10. Every post should contain two visible, legible complete sentences, Subject and Predicate. C'mon, make your old English teachers proud.

11. Remember, Random Banter is not your IM client. If you want to have a back and forth discussion with just one person, look in their contact information for IM details.

12. Whenever a new thread is created, all "first post", "first page", and all posts of that nature will be deleted by the administrators. Please avoid doing this, as it is frustrating for them to deal with one-lined posts like this.

13. Double-posting is not your friend. We have edit buttons for a reason.

14. Once you have made a Random Banter thread, you must wait 50 threads before making another one.


Previous Threads:
Amotis' Random Banter #1 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13484)
Dhavaer's Random Banter #2 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13401)
PhoeKun's Random Banter #3 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13319)
Rei Jin's Random Banter #4 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13205)
Toxic Avenger's Random Banter #5 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13146)
Jibar's Random Banter #6 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=13026)
Ego Slayer's Surrogate Random Banter #7 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12939)
Sneak's Random Barroom Brawl #8 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12918)
Sophistemon's Solemnly Random Banter #9 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12855)
Vaynor's Very Random Banter #10 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12834)
Bookman's Blathering Random Banter #11 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12809)
Gralamin's Glorious Random Banter #12 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12785)
Rilik's Resplendently Random Raillery #13 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12766)
Gezina's Growling Grazing Random Banter #14 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12747)
The Zerglings Utterly And Geeky Random Banter #15 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12740)
jaqueses Truthfully Randomly Fireside Banter # 16 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12735)
Jack Squat’s Jubilantly Quixotic Random Banter #17 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12693)
Cardel's Banter of Cookie Jubilation #18 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12668)
Archonic's Chaotically Random Banter of Rods #19 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12657)
The Rod's Inanimate Temple of RANDOM banter #20 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12638)
Lucky’s Loquaciously Loud-Mouthed Random Banter#21 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12630)
Deckmaster's Divinely Delightful Random Banter #22 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12614)
Saithis' Soliloquy of Random Banter #23 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12598)
Loveable Lianae's Ludicrous Lampooning Lottery #24 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12578)
NEO|Phyte's Neolithic Nest of Weasel Banter #25 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12544)
Target's Random Banter of "non-violence" #26 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12533)
Tarnag40k's Random banter of "grammar errors" #27 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12515)
Kyrian's Random Banter of ADHDness #28 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12507)
El Jaspero's Random Drunken Ramblings #29 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12503)
Boss Smiley's Eloquently Eggy Banter #30 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12494)
Lykan's Looney Explosionarama & Random Banter #31 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12482)
Iames's Iambic Yarn of Yammering #32 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12468)
Dispozition's Deviously Distressed Banter #33 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12458)
CP's Copiously Combusting Banter of Carnage #34 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12445)
Alarra's Altar of Random Banter #35 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12432)
Eloquent Rune's Electrifying Rambling Banter #36 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12423)
E_P's Very Own Quite Popular Random Banter #37 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12419)
Hydrogelic's Foolish Mortal Random Banter #38 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12413)
Ink's Smudgy Splotchy Random Banter #39 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12405)
Azrael's Big Black Book of Banter #40 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12397)
The Logic Vampire's Rational Random Banter #41 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12387)
Shiny's Shimmering Space-hitchin Random Banter #42 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12376)
ZombieRockStar's Random Banter #43 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12360)
Nostrabel's Realm of Cookies and Random Banter #44 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12342)
Charity's Cheery Chatter Circle #45 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12328)
Samiam's Spontaneous Scintillating Soliloquy #46 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=12310)
LLama's Masked Mysterious Random Banter #47 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=26599)
Ravishing Rydia's Recumbentibus ^_^ Random Banter #48 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27622)
Penguinizers Perilous Random Banter #49 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=28083)
Death's delightfully morbid surrogate random banter #50 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=28444)
Wayril's wonderfully weird surrogate random banter #51 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=28990)
Rawhide's Deck of Random Banter (52 Cards) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=29697)
Korith's Sorrogate Random Banter of Zombie Killing #53 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=30353)
Surrogate thread of random Bor-dom #54 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=31109)
Rex Idiotarum's Painfully Pogoing Thread #55 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=31512)
The Wrath of KHAAAAAANtalas’s William Shatner Flavored Random Banter # 56 (Surrogate) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=32080)
EmeraldRose's Random Banter of Lashing Wit #57 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=32494)
Captain van der Decken's Surrogate Ship of Random Loot (Banter) #58 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=32847)
SDF's Neverending I-Don't-Have-an-OotS-Avatar-Yet Story Banter #59 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=33465)
Mauril's Surrogate Dwelf Banter of Fantasy Race Confusion 60th Edition (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=34165)
Rockphed's Dice Rolling Toga Party of 61 Drunken CIA Analysts (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=34568)
var Lord_Magtok = Random(Banter*62) + Surrogate (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=34801)
Jibar's Retro Random Banter #63 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35014)
Malina's Random Spanish Banter #64 of morphical annoyance (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35256)
Mr. E's Random Banter #65 of Cane Toting and Hat Tipping (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35418)
Ego Slayer's Hellishly Random Banter #66.6 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35596)
Purple Gelatinous Cube o' Doom's bowl of bantery j-e-ll-o randomness #67 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=35859)
Zephra's Random Banter of Ghostly Wailings, and Howling Fun#68 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=36317)
Cobra Ikari's Random Banter #69 of Rampant Hugging, Guttermindedness, and ;-) Kinky. (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=36977)
Scorpina's Random Banter #70 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37480)
Raistlin1040's Super Special Awesome Random Banter #71(Now with 20% more tacos) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37824)
Uberblah's Random Banter #72 Of Caffeine And Sleep Deprivation Induced Randomness (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=38225)
Lucky’s Random Banter #73 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=38987)
Castaras's Random Banter #74 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=37836)
D'anna Biers RB #75 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=39495)
Zeb The Troll's RB#76 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=39801)
Egdpollard's RB #77 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=40128)
Gezina's and Calamity's Random banter #78 of double entendre and doom (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=40410)
Random Banter #79 In Loving Memory of Hexa_Regina (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=40909)
Zeratul's random banter #80 of throwing puppies off bridges (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=41778)
Vespe's Random Banter #81 of singing dolphins and mostly harmless planets. (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=43254)
CSK's Giant in the Playground Forums Addicted Anonymous, Random Banter #82 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=44919)
Iames's Ramblingly Erratic Belldandy-Charged Random Banter #83 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=47592)
Serpentine's Scintillating Sensually and Sinuously Seductive Stochastic Satire #84 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=49048)
Radikalskippy's Random Banter #85 of lost ideas and where to find them... (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=50658)
Moon Called's Random Banter #86 of Sexy Anime Boys and Fangirl Squeals (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=51825)
Lilly's Lovely Random Banter #87 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=52783)
FdL's Fuzzbox-Fueled Random Banter #88 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=54612)
SweetRein's Sugary Restrained Random Banter #89 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=59668)
Midnight's Mutant Motorcycle Madness Random Banter #90 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=62430)
Em's Extremely Extraordinarily Epic Random Banter #91 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=65645)
Dragonrider's Random Banter in Conjunction with the Weighted Cube #92 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67629)
Bushranger's Bodaciously Buffed Random Banter-y Rooster #93 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=69425)
Haruki's Historically Hilarious Honey-covered Random Banter #94 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=71161)
North's Maple Syrup Flavored Non-Alliterative Random Banter #95 Eh? (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=73464)
Wadledo's Weirdly Warbling Watercress Watching Washing Machine Only Random Banter #96 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=75946)
SMEE's Random Banter #97 of gender bending and closet bursting (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=78694)
Raiser's Rambunctiously Rambling Random Banter #98 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=81626)
Dr. Bath's Random Banter, dripping with daring deeds of dastardly deipnosophists #99 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=84068)
VOTE, the Democracy Demon's Devilishly Devious and Decidedly Diabolical Desultory Derision (Random Banter) #100 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=84914)
Jack Squat's Justlessly Juxtaposed Random Banter #101 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=87577)
Dallas-Dakota's Dundering Dandelion's Devilish Damsel's Distress Random Banter #102 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=4790602#post4790602)
Destro Yersul's Dangerously Distracting and Doubtlessly Disturbing Random Banter #103 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=4903962#post4903962)
Aziraphiles Actually Alliterative and Awesomely Affluent Random Banter #104 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=92718)
Cristo's Consistently Confusing and Constantly Casual Random Banter #105 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=94491)
Dish's Delightfully Deranged and Deliciously Deliquent Random Banter # 106 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=95905)
Slayer's Seemingly Sweet and Socially Silly Random Banter # 107 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=97703)
Zero's ambrosial and aberrantly adventitious, abstemiously erudite Random Banter #108 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=99100)
Coplantor's Completely Creative Cautious and Contemplative Random Banter #109 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=100414)
Rutskarn's Roly-Poly Rebellious and Rejected Random Banter #110 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=101156)
TwoBitWriter's Tubular Tracts of Thought-Talking Random Banter #111 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=5600540#post5600540)
Phase's Phully Phormed, Phalangeal, and Phantasmagorical Random Banter #112 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=101988)
Wolfbane's Wonderfully Wacky and Wildly Wandom Random Banter #113 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=102865)
The Kiwi's Kinkily Knotted and Kookily Kickass Random Banter #114 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=103674)
Jude's Judgmental Jugular Jab and Jibber Jabbery Random Banter #115 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=104480)
The Throne of Thufir's Thoroughly Theoretical and Therapeutic Random Banter #116 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=105584)
Random Banter #117 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=106698)
Dragonprime's Dynamically Dangerous Dextrous and Destructive Random Banter #118 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=107882)
Farmer Felix's Fantastic FRandom FBanter #119 (may contain traces of fnuts) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=109007)
Groundhog's Random Banter of Weather Prediction and Anti-Gopherness (part one) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=110963&page=50)
Groundhog's Random Banter of Weather Prediction and Anti-Gopherness (part two) (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=113197)
Mrmud's Mixed-Up and Minimally Mechanized Random Banter #121 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=114623)
Dogmantra's Dastardly, Despotic and Dangerous Random Banter #122 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=116660)
Alteran's Amazingly Anachronistic, Altruistic, and Antagonistic Random Banter #123
(http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=118380)Admiral Euphoria's Random Banter Thread of Delusional Grandeur #124 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=6614894)
Fred's Flying Fishy, Fighting, Fiery, Fantastic Face Off Random Banter #125 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=121385)
Cyrano’s Non-Alliterative Inaugurational Random Banter #126 To Usher In The Future (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=122977)
Thanatos's Tharmturges Present: Tropical, Tipsy, and Typically Random Banter #127
loopy's Legendary and Long-Awaited Lollipop Fuelled Random Banter #128 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=123816)
Shadow's Shady Shop of Sharks, Shingles, Shammies, Shiny and Random Banter #129 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=125667)
KataraAltinaII's Premature Not So Short & To-The-Point Random Banter #130 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=126557)
Supagoof's Supa-Sensational Silly Symphonies Set Sizzingly On Fire Random Banter #131 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=128570)
Pyrian's Pyrotechnic Pyre of Pyrrhic Pyros with Pyrotic Pythics Random Banter #132! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=130459)
Perenelle's Pleasantly Playful and Passionately Peculiar Random Banter #133 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=131814)
Rpgsr4me's Ravenous, Roaring, Raging Rampage of Random Banter #134 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=7373844#post7373844)
Il'deav Ilah'naie's Indiscreet Intimacies on Indigo Iceboats Random Banter #135 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=134438)
Recaiden's Resplendent and Rotating Realistic Random Banter #136 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=136879)
Jibar's Random Banter #137: Return of the Cat-muffin (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=138879)
Edge's Effluence of Extravagant and Effulgent Random Banter #138 (”http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=7876065”)
Zeb The Troll's Zecond Go At Ze Random Banter #139 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8061505&postcount=1)
Curly's Rambunctious and Erudite Random Banter #140
Deth Muncher's Destructive and Meandering Random Banter #141 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=150904)
A Thread in Which Banter Most Random is Expulsed Into Existence, By Ravens_cry #142 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=156548)


So sayeth...uh...shoot, I ran out of S words. #o.o#

Uhh...*Does a little tap-dance* Welcome to the Random Banter!

[PJ the Epic]

MMMMM...new thread. I would breath it in, but my computer's a little large for my nose :smalltongue:

On another note, does anyone else like peanut butter and bacon sandwiches?:smallbiggrin:

[Dogmantra]

Any particular reason for all the S words?

[PJ the Epic]

Any particular reason for all the S words?
:smallconfused:

I think itsssss a tongue twissster. :smalltongue:

[Deth Muncher]

I bless this thread wiiiiiiith...
*BOOGIE*

[Pyrian]

On another note, does anyone else like peanut butter and bacon sandwiches?:smallbiggrin:Not yet, but I'm intrigued by the notion. :smallcool:

[Dragonrider]

Deary: Gah. Why are there like, 5 of you ladies in Oregon that I have contact with?

My best friend is chasing a girl with exactly your ...perspective... on things, and even though she's obviously into him and loves his company, she keeps waffling on him like a huge *****.


See, I wouldn't do that.

On the other hand, I might keep being nice and hanging out with him or whatever, and that can be easily mistaken for waffling/wanting it both ways. I know guys who fulfill all my on-paper "criteria" (i.e., the dealbreakers) who I'm just not interested in for reasons I can't fathom. And so it goes.

But anyway, back to what you said before, it's not that I'm Not Interested in Relationships. You see I was badly jilted mid-high school (I took it very seriously though in retrospect it was just the kind of thing that happens) and resolved to Not Like Guys for a while, and it worked because it seems I'm excellent at getting my brain to tell my heart to shut up. Or something. I'll probably go and get my li'l self all broken up and start all over again over this other guy, but whatever. Nineteen ain't sixteen.

[PJ the Epic]

Not yet, but I'm intrigued by the notion. :smallcool:

That was my dinner. Also, chunky peanut butter's better.

[Trobby]

Any particular reason for all the S words?

No. :smallbiggrin:

Well, someone said SOMETHING about S words, but maybe that person's name started with an S? I just went with the alliteration. ^^; (Besides, I is too hard).

Also, in the spirit of Boogie...

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Boogietrobulus.png

Boogie on, people. :smallwink:

[Coidzor]

Swanky.



On another note, does anyone else like peanut butter and bacon sandwiches?:smallbiggrin:Not yet, but I'm intrigued by the notion. :smallcool:
As am I.

Ahh, Jonathan Coulton is fun. Though talking to someone who just got an IUD put into them is probably the first time I've ever actually experienced being creeped out by human anatomy. Is very odd.

IO,ON: I'm bored enough to consider making a video recording myself waxing my leg in the worst and most painful way possible. SOmething's not right here.

Editu!:

Deary: Ahh, Highschool jilting. Yeah, that's something you should let influence your life in a major way. Like one of my friends whose youngest sister ran away from home after being dumped by an online boyfriend.

In other news, I am now no longer bored and instead depressed.

[Thajocoth]

I thought it was supposed to be at 50 pages that the new thread is made. Is 38 the new 50?

[PJ the Epic]

I'm bored enough to consider making a video recording myself waxing my leg in the worst and most painful way possible. SOmething's not right here.

Uhhhhh...:smallconfused:

...

:smalleek:

[Coidzor]

I thought it was supposed to be at 50 pages that the new thread is made. Is 38 the new 50?

Are you at some different number of posts per page than the rest of us? :smalltongue:

[Dogmantra]

I bless this thread wiiiiiiith...
*BOOGIE*


Also, in the spirit of Boogie...

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Boogietrobulus.png

Boogie on, people. :smallwink:

I see your boogying and getting it on down and raise you one inexplicable naked party!
http://i285.photobucket.com/albums/ll78/De_ressurect/nekkidparty.png


I thought it was supposed to be at 50 pages that the new thread is made. Is 38 the new 50?
You probably have it set to a non-default number of posts per page. I think the default is 15.

[Dragonrider]

You probably have it set to a non-default number of posts per page. I think the default is 15.

I thought it was 30 . . . .

[Dogmantra]

My mistake. It is indeed 30.

[Rawhide]

It was 15 on YaBB.

[Coidzor]

1470-1441 on the 49th page of the last Random Banter thread.

so, uh... 70-41... 60-40 = 20 10-1 = 9... 20+9... 29 posts per page... though... since it's not true subtraction, there's one I'm not counting, I believe the 1441 post, so that'd be 30 by my estimation.

Breaking News: Coidzor is too slow at basic mathematics.

[Dogmantra]

1470-1441 on the 49th page of the last Random Banter thread.

so, uh... 70-41... 60-40 = 20 10-1 = 9... 20+9... 29 posts per page... though... since it's not true subtraction, there's one I'm not counting, I believe the 1441 post, so that'd be 30 by my estimation.

Breaking News: Coidzor is too slow at basic mathematics.

Or you could go to page 1, scroll to the bottom and look at the post number. Y'know, the easy way.

[PJ the Epic]

Or you could go to page 1, scroll to the bottom and look at the post number. Y'know, the easy way.

Pfft...easy way. Only smart people do that. :smalltongue:

[Rawhide]

1470-1441 on the 49th page of the last Random Banter thread.

so, uh... 70-41... 60-40 = 20 10-1 = 9... 20+9... 29 posts per page... though... since it's not true subtraction, there's one I'm not counting, I believe the 1441 post, so that'd be 30 by my estimation.

Breaking News: Coidzor is too slow at basic mathematics.

Huh? I don't understand what you're trying to do here or why you've done it in such a complicated way. (Edit: Oh, I see. No, your maths should be 1471-1441 or 1470-1440, the answer to which is obvious. But, it's still far more complicated a method than it should have been.)

On the default settings there are 30 posts per page. If you open any multiple page thread, including the last Random banter, you will see that the first page contains posts 1 to 30.

Note: On the forum page, this would be expressed as 29 replies. The first post is not a reply and is thus not counted.

[Cobalt]

woooo

I've finally gotten a new iPod.

yaaaay


In other news, it is very dark all of the sudden. Where did the day go...

[Trobby]

I see your boogying and getting it on down and raise you one inexplicable naked party!
http://i285.photobucket.com/albums/ll78/De_ressurect/nekkidparty.png


And in an equal case of inexplicability, I endorse and participate in this party!

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Nudedance.png

#o.o# I hope I haven't started a bad trend, in my very first Random Banter. *Eeep!*

[PJ the Epic]

Ahhh!!

You've stained the otherwise nice white background!! :smallfrown:

[Dogmantra]

And in an equal case of inexplicability, I endorse and participate in this party!

LOVING the sound effects. Lighten up though. :smalltongue:

[Cobalt]

And in an equal case of inexplicability, I endorse and participate in this party!

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Nudedance.png

#o.o# I hope I haven't started a bad trend, in my very first Random Banter. *Eeep!*

Yes.

http://i754.photobucket.com/albums/xx188/JupiterCobalt/Assorted/TanIronCrossxCensorBar.jpg

But you had it coming. You with your banter.

[Rawhide]

Cobalt: What on earth is up with your regular avatar?

[PJ the Epic]

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Nudedance.png


Maybe we should just rename this thread "Introbulus' Fanservice Thread"

And then you could have guest "appearances".

I'm sure it'd get more hits. :smallamused:

Not in that way!! Get your mind out of the gutter!

@Rawhide: Good, so i'm not the only one. I thought my computer was broken. :smallbiggrin:

[Dogmantra]

@Rawhide: Good, so i'm not the only one. I thought my computer was broken. :smallbiggrin:

Maybe your monitor is too hot? Could be melting the avatar.

[Trobby]

LOVING the sound effects. Lighten up though. :smalltongue:

Studies have found that being embarrassed is much cuter. ;p

And no, this is not becoming a full-on fanservice thread. Nudity is voluntary. :smalltongue:

It is also somewhat troubling that naked me is so popular for quoting...#<.<#

[Cobalt]

I'll be honest: I don't know where I got that messed up image from, but I am using it for teh lulz at the moment because, why let a picture go to waste?

It seriously just appeared in my images folder. I'm actually slightly creeped out.

Looks awesome though.


So yes, if you were wondering; that is on purpose. I just have no idea where on earth it came from.

[Trobby]

There's a thin white bar below it. Might just be a corrupt file.

[Cobalt]

Probably. But hey, whatever works. Other images seem fine, so I'm not worried about it.

[Froogleyboy]

I'm not sure if this is the place to post this, but I thought with a title like "random banter" it'd be fine, if not, ignore it. I just have to tell someone. In four days, my dad get's out of jail! I'm so excited! I haven't seen him in two years! :smallbiggrin:

[Rawhide]

I'm not sure if this is the place to post this, but I thought with a title like "random banter" it'd be fine, if not, ignore it. I just have to tell someone. In four days, my dad get's out of jail! I'm so excited! I haven't seen him in two years! :smallbiggrin:

If you don't mind me asking, what was he convicted of?

[Coidzor]

If you don't mind me asking, what was he convicted of?
And here I was worried. phew.

Hope things go well with that, Froogley.

[FinalJustice]

I'll be honest: I don't know where I got that messed up image from, but I am using it for teh lulz at the moment because, why let a picture go to waste?

It seriously just appeared in my images folder. I'm actually slightly creeped out.

Looks awesome though.


So yes, if you were wondering; that is on purpose. I just have no idea where on earth it came from.

Your computer may be secretly plotting to kill you. Don't worry too much about it, they do that all the time.

[Froogleyboy]

If you don't mind me asking, what was he convicted of?
I don't mind you asking, I just don't know. He had been on a fight with some guy and he had called the cops on the man because he threatened to burn our house down. But when the cops got there, they said that he had a warrant out for him. :smallfrown:

[Cealocanth]

OMG!!!!!!1!!!!! It spiked over 100 degrees Fahrenheit today. Thank God for air conditioning, I was nearly baking when I went out to get the mail today.

[KenderWizard]

I'm not sure if this is the place to post this, but I thought with a title like "random banter" it'd be fine, if not, ignore it. I just have to tell someone. In four days, my dad get's out of jail! I'm so excited! I haven't seen him in two years! :smallbiggrin:

That's good news! I hope everything goes well!


OMG!!!!!!1!!!!! It spiked over 100 degrees Fahrenheit today. Thank God for air conditioning, I was nearly baking when I went out to get the mail today.

I'm in Virginia right now and it's sooooooo warm. Not today, actually, today was a little better, but still warmer than anything you'd get in Ireland! I think the warmest it's been here was 40'C, which is 104'F or something.
:smallmad: <-- it's red because it's so hot!

[Deth Muncher]

That's good news! I hope everything goes well!



I'm in Virginia right now and it's sooooooo warm. Not today, actually, today was a little better, but still warmer than anything you'd get in Ireland! I think the warmest it's been here was 40'C, which is 104'F or something.
:smallmad: <-- it's red because it's so hot!

:O As a Virginialander, yes, it gets insufferable from time to time. Especially because of all the damned humidity. Not all of us get humidity in the form of rain. -glares at Irelanders/Britlanders-

[KenderWizard]

:O As a Virginialander, yes, it gets insufferable from time to time. Especially because of all the damned humidity. Not all of us get humidity in the form of rain. -glares at Irelanders/Britlanders-

It has its benefits and its downsides. No sunburn, yet also no picnics. Well, actually, we're pretty optimistic, so there does tend to be picnics. They usually happen in a car, watching the rain outside!

[Deth Muncher]

It has its benefits and its downsides. No sunburn, yet also no picnics. Well, actually, we're pretty optimistic, so there does tend to be picnics. They usually happen in a car, watching the rain outside!

When I visited Dublin/Cork/Blarney/Waterford two years ago, the first cabbie we came across summed it up well: "It only rained twice last week - once for three days and once for four."

[Eadin]

Ooooh, fancy new thread...:smallbiggrin:

[Quincunx]

Froogleyboy: You didn't happen to have gotten your growth spurt in those last two years, have you? :smallcool: Would be weird (yet cool) (yet weird) if you were suddenly eye-to-eye with him now.


I'm in Virginia right now and it's sooooooo warm. Not today, actually, today was a little better, but still warmer than anything you'd get in Ireland! I think the warmest it's been here was 40'C, which is 104'F or something.
:smallmad: <-- it's red because it's so hot!

Bring Some of That Warmth Back With You! I am FREEZING here! It's July! Long sleeves after dark are unnatural!
(shakes KenderWizard by the lapels 'til someone pries her fingers open)
. . .oh, and since you're in Virginia and thus good food country, here's a list of foods you need to bring back and popularize here.

10:40. Sunshine. 10:43. Misty rain. 10:46. Rain hissing like a snake pit. 10:50. Misty rain. 10:53. Sunshine.

[Thufir]

It has its benefits and its downsides. No sunburn, yet also no picnics. Well, actually, we're pretty optimistic, so there does tend to be picnics. They usually happen in a car, watching the rain outside!

Weather in the UK, and I assume Ireland as well, works according to sod's law. The easiest way to make it rain is to declare you're going to have a picnic, and a barbecue, on the beach, and play cricket.

[Dallas-Dakota]

*Note: There actually is not a sport called cricket, the English just use Cricket as a word for their favorite outdoor sport.

[Dogmantra]

Weather in the UK, and I assume Ireland as well, works according to sod's law. The easiest way to make it rain is to declare you're going to have a picnic, and a barbecue, on the beach, and play cricket.
Silly three man cricket in the rain on the beach is great fun. Of course, a proper game of cricket isn't but "whatevs".


*Note: There actually is not a sport called cricket, the English just use Cricket as a word for their favorite outdoor sport.
Who would name a game after a horrible intergalactic war anyway?

[CurlyKitGirl]

Originally posted (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=8916042&postcount=1476) by DeeRee
But a house on fire indeed. We really must one day arrange a meeting. :smallbiggrin:

Well, in two years it's highly likely I'll be going to Trogland (around about the end of June/beginning of July (or both)) because History Friend'll be twenty-one.
Is two years a long enough notification of a potential meetup?

Something highly unusual happened last night.
For the first time in a couple of months it rained at home. Properly. Not just a minute or two of mist, but actual, proper Britlander rain.
I'd actually forgotten how noisy it could be.
And the temperature's back down to summer normal too. All is right with the world.

[Phase]

Where is Trogland? I've never figured it out...

Also, my legs are so riddled with mosquito bites that they feel like a pair of cobblestone pathways straight down to hell.

[Recaiden]

And in an equal case of inexplicability, I endorse and participate in this party!

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b244/Introbulus/Nudedance.png

#o.o# I hope I haven't started a bad trend, in my very first Random Banter. *Eeep!*

What naked avatar trend?
http://i41.tinypic.com/rlyq2u.jpg

Where is Trogland? I've never figured it out...

Also, my legs are so riddled with mosquito bites that they feel like a pair of cobblestone pathways straight down to hell.

It's the middle part of this one, Phase. You can see it out of the corner of your eye right now.
http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/namerica/aaposter/naone.jpg

[Phaedra]

Something highly unusual happened last night.
For the first time in a couple of months it rained at home. Properly. Not just a minute or two of mist, but actual, proper Britlander rain.
I'd actually forgotten how noisy it could be.
And the temperature's back down to summer normal too. All is right with the world.

I know, wasn't it lovely? I could actually wander around without my skin burning on a level usually only seen in creatures of the night. About 3/4 of the students in my office are from abroad so I've been dealing with comments about missing the sun all day, but they are FOOLS because grey drizzle is the proper way of the world. I miss winter, winter doesn't fry my skin.

[Dogmantra]

I miss winter, winter doesn't fry my skin.

Everyone knows that if your breath doesn't freeze the moment you exhale, it's too hot. And I'm not talking about the water vapour.

[Thufir]

About 3/4 of the students in my office are from abroad so I've been dealing with comments about missing the sun all day, but they are FOOLS because grey drizzle is the proper way of the world.

Damn right. Proper British weather. Love it.

[drakir_nosslin]

Uff, I'm working abroad this summer, much because the summers here tend to be better (read: hotter/sunnier) than back at home. What happens? Cloudy with a chance of meatballs every single day. And in Sweden? Heat wave that makes the tropics envious... :smallmad: MLIA, ha!

[Rawhide]

Thufir, I felt the need to provide you with this little fable.

There was a baby owl and a daddy owl. The baby owl was learning how to live in the world, he was starting to develop his call.

The baby own cried out "Wot. Wot wot. Wot wot wot wot wot. Wot."

"No," said the daddy owl, "it's not wot, you know, it's who-whoooo-whooooooooooooo, you know."

[Dogmantra]

Thufir, I felt the need to provide you with this little fable.

There was a baby owl and a daddy owl. The baby owl was learning how to live in the world, he was starting to develop his call.

The baby own cried out "Wot. Wot wot. Wot wot wot wot wot. Wot."

"No," said the daddy owl, "it's not wot, you know, it's who-whoooo-whooooooooooooo, you know."

Doctor Who?
Otherwise I don't get it. In fact, even if it is Doctor Who, I don't get it.

[Rawhide]

Doctor Who?
Otherwise I don't get it. In fact, even if it is Doctor Who, I don't get it.

It's not what you know, it's who you know.

People who know powerful people get jobs easier than people with qualifications.

[Dogmantra]

It's not what you know, it's who you know.

People who know powerful people get jobs easier than people with qualifications.

Oh I get it now. I thought it was replacing the English stereotype of saying "wot" all the time with the English stereotype of liking Doctor Who more than is perhaps healthy. I sort of thought it was one of those anti-jokes that are funny by virtue of being completely absurd and not actually funny, like "How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?"
Answer: Fish.

[Eadin]

I have the feeling I should start watching Doctor Who...

[PJ the Epic]

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?"
Answer: Fish.

I thought it was "to get to the other side." :smallconfused:

[Rawhide]

I have the feeling I should start watching Doctor Who...

Yes. You should. I can't stress this enough.

[Dogmantra]

I thought it was "to get to the other side." :smallconfused:

Oh, no, you're thinking of that other joke, you know:
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Surrealist
Surrealist who?
To get to the other side!
(alternatively: Orange you glad I didn't say banana?)

[PJ the Epic]

Yes. You should. I can't stress this enough.

I don't own any Doctor Who. Is Monty Python's Flying Circus good enough?

[Eadin]

Yes. You should. I can't stress this enough.

I'll know what to do for the next few months...

[Trobby]

Oh I get it now. I thought it was replacing the English stereotype of saying "wot" all the time with the English stereotype of liking Doctor Who more than is perhaps healthy. I sort of thought it was one of those anti-jokes that are funny by virtue of being completely absurd and not actually funny, like "How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?"
Answer: Fish.

Ah, you only saw the funny part of the joke, and not the part that was mimicking a life lesson.

Does...does that mean the joke has been ruined? o.o; Or is it totally intact? I can't tell.

ION: It's been raining here too. Every day now, it seems. Which is good, because we really needed some rain for the past couple of days before it started, but it seems like it's raining all the time now. And as I type this, it has stopped raining entirely. -_-; Darn persnickety mother nature.

[PJ the Epic]

Ah, you only saw the funny part of the joke, and not the part that was mimicking a life lesson.

Does...does that mean the joke has been ruined? o.o; Or is it totally intact? I can't tell.

ION: It's been raining here too. Every day now, it seems. Which is good, because we really needed some rain for the past couple of days before it started, but it seems like it's raining all the time now. And as I type this, it has stopped raining entirely. -_-; Darn persnickety mother nature.

That is a very underused word. I like it. :smallbiggrin:

[Rawhide]

I'll know what to do for the next few months...

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff72/Littleradge/goin2TARDISb128448902364290000.jpg
http://www.fanboy.com/archive-images/lol-cat-dr-who.jpg
http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/1/1/128753183982894454.jpg
Darn I love that last one...


Oh I get it now. I thought it was replacing the English stereotype of saying "wot" all the time with the English stereotype of liking Doctor Who more than is perhaps healthy.

Well, to be fair, I had to modify the joke a little. It is normally written as the correct spelling, "what", but Thufir's signature was using the spelling "wot". That too might have thrown you off.

[PJ the Epic]

http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/1/1/128753183982894454.jpg
Darn I love that last one...


What? :smallconfused:

[Eadin]

http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff72/Littleradge/goin2TARDISb128448902364290000.jpg
http://www.fanboy.com/archive-images/lol-cat-dr-who.jpg
http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2009/1/1/128753183982894454.jpg
Darn I love that last one...


Kittehs! I lurv dem!
and if that last guy is the actual Doctor Who, I am going to love this show

[Froogleyboy]

Everyone is complaining about the heat, but personally, I love it. I don't think it's a good Alabama summer till it starts getting in the triple digits. Though, maybe that's just me. Heck, the only thing I like about winter is no one thinks I'm a loon for wearing long sleeves.

[Dogmantra]

Kittehs! I lurv dem!
and if that last guy is the actual Doctor Who, I am going to love this show
If you're watching New Who, it's one series of another dude (Christopher Eccleston), four (I think) series with "that last guy" (David Tenant), then one series with yet another dude (Matt Smith, who is still the Doctor).

[Eadin]

If you're watching New Who, it's one series of another dude (Christopher Eccleston), four (I think) series with "that last guy" (David Tenant), then one series with yet another dude (Matt Smith, who is still the Doctor).
*googles*

I like this show :smallbiggrin:

[Rawhide]

Kittehs! I lurv dem!
and if that last guy is the actual Doctor Who, I am going to love this show

He's one of them, the Tenth Doctor. He was the doctor for seasons 2 to 4 (plus a a few movie-length and mini-series specials) of the new Dr Who series.

[Eadin]

If only I could find the series online

Edit: yay, I found a website :)

[Phase]

By which she of course means she procured a box set after paying for it in a completely legal manner, and is now watching the series legally off the disks she purchased without infringing on pirating laws.

[Eadin]

By which she of course means she procured a box set after paying for it in a completely legal manner, and is now watching the series legally off the disks she purchased without infringing on pirating laws.

Yes, that was what I meant, I see now I made it sound different
They don't sell the series in Belgium ( I think)
So I have to order from the internet
yay for amazon?
still have to wait a week before they arrive though...

[drakir_nosslin]

By which she of course means she procured a box set after paying for it in a completely legal manner, and is now watching the series legally off the disks she purchased without infringing on pirating laws.

Of course, no one on this esteemed and highly praised forum would ever consider downloading copyrighted material without sufficient permission. Ever.

[Cobalt]

Of course, no one on this esteemed and highly praised forum would ever consider downloading copyrighted material without sufficient permission. Ever.

*shifty eyes*

...Is he gone yet?

:p

[lobablob]

Of course, no one on this esteemed and highly praised forum would ever consider downloading copyrighted material without sufficient permission. Ever.

Of course not, you have to pass stringent background checks to make sure that you're a person of good character before you're allowed to make an account here.

[CurlyKitGirl]

[blah blah blah]. . . the English stereotype of liking Doctor Who more than is perhaps healthy.[blah blah blah]

>.>
<.<
What about the American/geek/sci-fi stereotype of liking Star Trek more than is perhaps healthy?
Need I say that Klingon (and apparently Vulcan) both are fully constructed languages now. And people are fluent in them.

I'm still amused by that.

'Course, LoTR has Quenya and that other one. And Nazghul (sp?), so yeah.

'Course, I also want to be fluent in multiple dead languages which will probably never have any impact on my life ever, so I'm really not one to say anything.
>.>
<.<
And last term I got into a talk with Law Friend about the relative advantages and disadvantages of Vulcan, Klingon, QUenya, Esperanto and other conlangs, as well as discussing the linguistics of conlangs when compared to real languages.

Yeah, I really shouldn't be saying anything. I'll just sidle away now before I catch something.

[Blue Ghost]

Of course not, you have to pass stringent background checks to make sure that you're a person of good character before you're allowed to make an account here.

I once persuaded a friend to join GitP. She was freaked out by how uniformly nice everyone was here. She believes that it's because we somehow kill all the mean people. We don't really do that, do we?

[lobablob]

Well, there have been a few people who I've had a slight dislike of who no longer post here...

[Scorpina]

In my experience, mean people get banned with quite a lot of efficiecny. I like that.

[Archonic Energy]

She believes that it's because we somehow kill all the mean people. We don't really do that, do we?

not officially...

*takes a note of Blue Ghost's IP*

... you may know too much

[CurlyKitGirl]

You're right, he knows too much.
You know who to contact this time of year.

[Teddy]

Uff, I'm working abroad this summer, much because the summers here tend to be better (read: hotter/sunnier) than back at home. What happens? Cloudy with a chance of meatballs every single day. And in Sweden? Heat wave that makes the tropics envious... :smallmad: MLIA, ha!

:smalltongue::smalltongue::smalltongue: :smalltongue::smalltongue::smalltongue:
:tongue:

ION: Cherries are starting to ripen, there are still a lot of wild strawberries and I'm developing a nice and healthy tan.


Oh I get it now. I thought it was replacing the English stereotype of saying "wot" all the time with the English stereotype of liking Doctor Who more than is perhaps healthy. I sort of thought it was one of those anti-jokes that are funny by virtue of being completely absurd and not actually funny, like "How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?"
Answer: Fish.

You did just Wiki "Non sequitur", didn't you? YOU DID, DIDN'T YOU!?
:smallwink:

[Archonic Energy]

You're right, he knows too much.
You know who to contact this time of year.

Confirmed.

47 is enroute.

@Blue Ghost please ignore the bald man in a black suit with a red tie... this will soon be over.

[Blue Ghost]

I am a loyal Playgrounder! I swear! :smalleek:
You know that the last round you didn't even need to renew your mind control on m-- There is no mind control, citizen. Go back to your fun.

[Dogmantra]

You did just Wiki "Non sequitur", didn't you? YOU DID, DIDN'T YOU!?
:smallwink:

I did steal that joke from the wikipedia page for non sequitur, I admit, though I last looked at the page a long time ago.

[CurlyKitGirl]

Confirmed.

47 is enroute.

@Blue Ghost please ignore the bald man in a black suit with a red tie... this will soon be over.

Send receipt and notification to Division Leader Five-Q.

Coverage of Suspects Seven through to Nineteen has proven them to be dangerous and cranky.
I suggest we move them to the next level of security.

[Quincunx]

I am not "cranky", I am chocolate-deprived! And it was YOU who were responsible for the culling of the tree line on my hillside and subsequent clear line of fire into the computer room!

*****

Aha, so Froogleyboy's going to the dark side just to have the excuse to wear dark, heat-absorbing, warm clothing year-round!

[Trobby]

Curly being suspiciously geeky.

1) Are you, in fact, naked? ;o I mean, if I recall, you have switched species, and are clearly covered in fur. Does this not mean you are, by animal standards, clothed? Or does the lack of a collar equal nudity in the animal kingdom?

2) Yes, Star Trek (and Star Wars) are an extraordinary source of geekdom in the USA, possibly even moreso than Dr. Who in the UK. Truth be told, I'm a fan of TNG myself, but I wouldn't consider myself a rabid fan by any standards. I don't try to learn any of the languages, never go to a con, and don't dress up as any of the characters. Though there are enough people who do to say that yes, it does have an unhealthy fanbase. Especially for a series that is currently running on nothing but nostalgia.

[CurlyKitGirl]

I am not "cranky", I am chocolate-deprived! And it was YOU who were responsible for the culling of the tree line on my hillside and subsequent clear line of fire into the computer room!

Suspect Eleven is being obstreperous and paranoid. Call in Number 1.
Repeat, call in Number 1.


1) Are you, in fact, naked? ;o I mean, if I recall, you have switched species, and are clearly covered in fur. Does this not mean you are, by animal standards, clothed? Or does the lack of a collar equal nudity in the animal kingdom?

Female cat (aka my real life pet Smudge) becomes human nekkid dude. Opposites.
Therefore female clothed Curly becomes male nekkid cat. Opposites.

I don't really know if you'd say a collar equals nudity in the animal kingdom otherwise you'd have to admit the pets with collars (a real minority) were naked.
In that case it would be the, um, the clothists? Yeah, why not, it would be the clothists who were the weird ones.
And to be honest, have you ever tried to keep a collar on a cat? It's really difficult.


2) Yes, Star Trek (and Star Wars) are an extraordinary source of geekdom in the USA, possibly even moreso than Dr. Who in the UK. Truth be told, I'm a fan of TNG myself, but I wouldn't consider myself a rabid fan by any standards. I don't try to learn any of the languages, never go to a con, and don't dress up as any of the characters. Though there are enough people who do to say that yes, it does have an unhealthy fanbase. Especially for a series that is currently running on nothing but nostalgia.

Eh, I'm a wee bit of a Trekkie, I like to watch TOS, TNG, and I've seen all the movies.
ANd to be honest, I think any series of anything at all is likely to have a section of their fanbase which is unhealthily obsessed with it.
And if I can get my mother (who really doesn't like much sci-fi) into discussing the relative merits of all Eleven Doctors, the three or four versions of the Master and all the Doctor's other enemies I'd say that there's probably a point where a show just becomes a part of the cultural heritage of .
She does have the added bonus of having been six or seven when the show began too.
Now Doctor Who has [I]nostalgia, but we have reboot!nostalgia as well.

ANd given the popularity of the last Star Trek movie, I'm just waiting for them to try and do a reboot!show as well.
Actually, that'd be crazily funny. Them trying to do a reboot!TOS. The fanwars would power the globe. And implode the internet.
:amused:
The series has already been contracted to do another two movies anyway, and it's been what, five years since they launched a Star Trek TV show. We're overdue.

[KenderWizard]

And to be honest, have you ever tried to keep a collar on a cat? It's really difficult.


I suspect if it bothered you in some way in your day-to-day life for your cat to be wearing a collar, your cat would manage to somehow find a collar and get it on himself.

[Coidzor]

See, that's still the creepiest avatar I've seen on this website.

It actually causes me discomfit. Which is weird.

[Thufir]

And if I can get my mother (who really doesn't like much sci-fi) into discussing the relative merits of all Eleven Doctors, the three or four versions of the Master and all the Doctor's other enemies I'd say that there's probably a point where a show just becomes a part of the cultural heritage of [insert country].

There's a reason it was topping my list of things to put in my Nationality Week avatar.


And given the popularity of the last Star Trek movie, I'm just waiting for them to try and do a reboot!show as well.
Actually, that'd be crazily funny. Them trying to do a reboot!TOS. The fanwars would power the globe. And implode the internet.
:amused:
The series has already been contracted to do another two movies anyway, and it's been what, five years since they launched a Star Trek TV show. We're overdue.

Oh, that'd be great. Actually, my experience of Star Trek is entirely the new movie, but that's enough to get me into it. Want more Spock.

[Dogmantra]

Suspect Eleven is being obstreperous and paranoid. Call in Number 1.
Repeat, call in Number 1.

You called?

[Trobby]

Nudity and Star Trek.

I see. *cuddles the confused male Curly kitty* ^o^


As for a new Star Trek...I think we're going to have to wait some time for that to come out. I have a strong feeling they're going to reboot it based on the movie, and that will definitely have some backlash, but what will cause more discomfort in the fan base is the bad taste left by the last series that they tried to push out. Enterprise was, by all accounts, an unmitigated failure.

However, with the popularity of the last movie still brimming in the public's mind, a new series, starring the new adventures of Kirk and Mr. Spock, may begin! That is...if they can get the movie actors to sit still long enough to cast for a TV series. Not sure how well movie actors will transition into TV roles. Or if they'll even be willing to, considering the absurd sums they get paid for being a movie actor.

They might be willing, but if not, then the last Movie may have doomed our hopes for a series reboot, since there's no way they could successfully pass off a whole series with anything but the crew that movie audiences are familiar with from the movie. Something ingrained into the public mind makes them reject the notion that directors might want to cast other actors into leading roles.

That, or we'd have to go for another non-Enterprise series, akin to Voyager and DS9, which I wouldn't mind.

[Pyrian]

Something ingrained into the public mind makes them reject the notion that directors might want to cast other actors into leading roles.Are you sure about that? :smallconfused: I mean, continuity is great and all, but the exceptions are legion, and not noticeably less successful. 'Course, I can only bring the successful ones to mind, so it's hardly a controlled study, but still...

[Trobby]

I am not entirely sure about that, actually. But it seems a safe enough bet. I find it hard to believe that the female fanbase, specifically, would be quite so attached to the series if they had to re-cast Spock.

What is it with Spock and his ability to magnetize the female audience anyway? I mean I'm just speaking from what I've heard and seen, but it seems like he always gets the ladies, despite being a logical, calculating being. Is the whole "hard to get" thing really that effective? :smallconfused:

[Superglucose]

I feel, randomly, that Eadin should add http://kol.coldfront.net/thekolwiki/images/f/f3/Familiar23.gif to her signature.

[Eadin]

:smallconfused:
And why is that?

[Superglucose]

Whenever I think of the Cheshire Cat, I think of the Cheshire Bat, and then I remember this:

"No arguments - if a baby cat is a kitten, a baby bat is a bitten."

So whenever I see your avatar, I think of the Cheshire Cat, which makes me think of the Cheshire Bat, which makes me think of the Cheshire Bitten.

[Thufir]

I am not entirely sure about that, actually. But it seems a safe enough bet. I find it hard to believe that the female fanbase, specifically, would be quite so attached to the series if they had to re-cast Spock.

What is it with Spock and his ability to magnetize the female audience anyway? I mean I'm just speaking from what I've heard and seen, but it seems like he always gets the ladies, despite being a logical, calculating being. Is the whole "hard to get" thing really that effective? :smallconfused:

Well, I'm not female, but I like him a lot because I really like the whole logic thing. I hold logic up as kind of an ideal to strive for, so a character who more or less embodies it is just awesome to me.
I also like Spock because he's Zachary Quinto.

[Castaras]

I didn't particularly care for original series Spock. Haven't seen the recent film so can't comment on that.

Tbh, I don't really care for any of the guys in any of the Star Treks I've seen. Except possibly Worf. Because he's awesome in both TNG and DS9.

[Eadin]

I also like Spock because he's Zachary Quinto.
I like Zachary Quinto because he's Spock. And Sylar. And he looks like Eli Roth.
Who played in Inglourious Bastards.I love that movie

[Superglucose]

Not even Picard? o.O

Also I'd like to say that, in regards to the last bit of conversation in the last thread, that I have finally seen a pic of Curly and I must say that yes, you definitely fill the "cute" requirement.

Blue eyes <3

[Castaras]

Not even Picard? o.O


I don't feel particularly attracted to older bald men at this moment of teenage existence. :smalltongue:

And yes, Curly is awesome and cute. :smallcool:

[Phase]

I don't feel particularly attracted to older bald men at this moment of teenage existence. :smalltongue:

That's insane. Even I feel attracted to Picard at this moment of teenage existence, and I'm the most heterosexual guy this side of penis.

EDIT: Crap, Paris! Paris!

[The Succubus]

Interesting thread ya have here.

It doesn't so much meander but more staggers from one topic to another in a drunken stupor, throws up geeky stuff on the furniture and collapses on the floor, waiting for a friendly mod to put it to bed.

I may have to pass this way more often.

[Trobby]

She's a little bit misbehaved, but I do love her so. *hugs the Thread* And she's getting a bit better. We've maintained the discussion on Star Trek for almost a whole page now.

[PJ the Epic]

Uwaaa!

I have no life! This summer, I've done 50 hours of community service for my library. I can't tell if its a good thing or a depressing thing. :smallfrown::smallconfused::smallbiggrin:

[Lillith]

Oh Lord my back is absolutely killing me right now. It´s like I have a colon of pain and agony in my back. The reason? Well I like puzzling a lot and had gotten a 2000 piece puzzle from my mom for my birthday. I can take on 3000 piece puzzles and finish them within 5 days. My mom however got me this (http://www.koolandunusual.com.au/images/gothic/puzzle_2000_leaves.jpg) puzzle. It's an absolute nightmare!

It looks as difficult as it is. The girls skin/face and the skull were easy. The red in her corset easy as well. The leaves and the dress? I've been working on those for two weeks now. Not none stop because I had school and the likes in it, but now I'm running out of time. It has to be finished this Saturday. Not only because my mom is sick of me hogging the dinner table, but because on Sunday I'm going on vacation. So I've spend every free moment of my time on this damn puzzle because I REFUSE TO GIVE IN AND LET THIS BLOODY THING WIN!!! At this point, I have finished every single puzzle I have ever gotten my hands on AND THIS ONE WILL NOT BE ANY DIFFERENT! :smallfurious:

I shall conquer this stupid thing and then BURN IT'S PIECES TILL IT REACHES THE DARK DARK DEPT OF OBLIVION! :smallfurious:

[Teddy]

That's insane. Even I feel attracted to Picard at this moment of teenage existence, and I'm the most heterosexual guy this side of penis.

EDIT: Crap, Paris! Paris!

Well, that shouldn't be especially hard. :smallamused: [/stereotype] :smalltongue:

And it's not like you don't have a giant steel phallus erect in the middle of Paris, anyway. :smallwink:

[KuReshtin]

Oh Lord my back is absolutely killing me right now. It´s like I have a colon of pain and agony in my back. The reason? Well I like puzzling a lot and had gotten a 2000 piece puzzle from my mom for my birthday. I can take on 3000 piece puzzles and finish them within 5 days. My mom however got me this (http://www.koolandunusual.com.au/images/gothic/puzzle_2000_leaves.jpg) puzzle. It's an absolute nightmare!

It looks as difficult as it is. The girls skin/face and the skull were easy. The red in her corset easy as well. The leaves and the dress? I've been working on those for two weeks now. Not none stop because I had school and the likes in it, but now I'm running out of time. It has to be finished this Saturday. Not only because my mom is sick of me hogging the dinner table, but because on Sunday I'm going on vacation. So I've spend every free moment of my time on this damn puzzle because I REFUSE TO GIVE IN AND LET THIS BLOODY THING WIN!!! At this point, I have finished every single puzzle I have ever gotten my hands on AND THIS ONE WILL NOT BE ANY DIFFERENT! :smallfurious:

I shall conquer this stupid thing and then BURN IT'S PIECES TILL IT REACHES THE DARK DARK DEPT OF OBLIVION! :smallfurious:

Good luck.
I gave my mother this (http://www.jigsawgallery.com/details.php?refnum=BV1004) puzzle for Christmas one year, and she didn't like it at all. The bottom bit wasn't too bad, but the dark blue sky was apparently a nightmare, cause every puzzle piece looked the same.

[KenderWizard]

Good luck.
I gave my mother this (http://www.jigsawgallery.com/details.php?refnum=BV1004) puzzle for Christmas one year, and she didn't like it at all. The bottom bit wasn't too bad, but the dark blue sky was apparently a nightmare, cause every puzzle piece looked the same.

I think I gave my mother the same one! She likes ridiculously hard puzzles, though, she does one a year and her favourite was a 5000-piece one of the Rosetta Stone. (http://www.culturelabel.com/uploads/cmcp86010-master.jpg)

[Coidzor]

I saw a horse with starry night painted on it just a few hours ago.

Similar horses are just popping up all around town. I blame the World Equestrian Games which start in 72 days, according to the electric countdown ticker.

[Worira]

I blame Horse Pope.

[Rawhide]

Oh Lord my back is absolutely killing me right now. It´s like I have a colon of pain and agony in my back. The reason? Well I like puzzling a lot and had gotten a 2000 piece puzzle from my mom for my birthday. I can take on 3000 piece puzzles and finish them within 5 days. My mom however got me this (http://www.koolandunusual.com.au/images/gothic/puzzle_2000_leaves.jpg) puzzle. It's an absolute nightmare!

It looks as difficult as it is. The girls skin/face and the skull were easy. The red in her corset easy as well. The leaves and the dress? I've been working on those for two weeks now. Not none stop because I had school and the likes in it, but now I'm running out of time. It has to be finished this Saturday. Not only because my mom is sick of me hogging the dinner table, but because on Sunday I'm going on vacation. So I've spend every free moment of my time on this damn puzzle because I REFUSE TO GIVE IN AND LET THIS BLOODY THING WIN!!! At this point, I have finished every single puzzle I have ever gotten my hands on AND THIS ONE WILL NOT BE ANY DIFFERENT! :smallfurious:

I shall conquer this stupid thing and then BURN IT'S PIECES TILL IT REACHES THE DARK DARK DEPT OF OBLIVION! :smallfurious:

Best jigsaw puzzle I've ever seen was entirely a single shade of sky blue, had no straight edge pieces (edge pieces look just like normal pieces) and had five extra pieces that didn't fit anywhere.

[Lillith]

The most difficult one I´ve done was a 3000 piece. To be honest I don´t dislike hard puzzles. I have to say that this one has been the biggest challenge I´ve heard for a very long time. The problem was that at the time I started this puzzle, I was looking for something to relax. An easy to do puzzle. Instead I got a real challenge while I have a time limit. ^^" If I had normal time to spend on it, instead of only a small time span, I'd enjoy it a lot more. Now it's just stressing me out.

[PJ the Epic]

My favorite puzzle is either this (http://www.puzzlehistory.com/eqv2.jpg) or this (http://images.marketplaceadvisor.channeladvisor.com/hi/79/79452/beatles_the_white_album_puzzle-01.jpg).

I attempted the second one, only to find out they had printed it on white backing. It was...:smallfrown:

[Dragonrider]

I need to remember to use multiquote instead of good old C+P. But . . . .


'Course, LoTR has Quenya and that other one. And Nazghul (sp?), so yeah.

Quenya, Sindarin, and the Black Speech (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Speech). The Nazgûl do speak it but I don't believe that's its proper name. And there were lots more languages, but I don't know how many had developed grammar and lexicon. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Languages_of_Arda#List_of_languages) And by the by, Tolkien was freaking amazing.


Eh, I'm a wee bit of a Trekkie, I like to watch TOS, TNG, and I've seen all the movies.

Yay! :smallbiggrin: I LOVE LOVE LOVE TNG, and am somewhat fond of DS9 but less so. Not a fan of Voyager or Enterprise. There's just something about the crew of TNG that is so endearing . . . which brings me to . . . .


Not even Picard? o.O

I don't know that I find him attractive, but I adore him anyway. And you know, probably the coolest thing is that a lot of the cast are still good friends - LeVar Burton (Geordi) and Brent Spiner (Data) in particular. I think I read somewhere that they and Patrick Stewart were all best men in Jonathan Frakes' (Riker's) wedding.

Also I feel like this is a death knell on whatever small reputation I have, but Wesley doesn't bother me that much. >.> I mean, yeah he's not particularly well written, but I don't see why he inspires such foaming-at-the-mouth RAGE. But maybe my opinion is influenced by the adult Wil Wheaton's awesomeness.


Not sure how well movie actors will transition into TV roles.

Just wanted to point out that Zachary Quinto, at least, is not a movie-only actor. :smalltongue:

[Rawhide]

Why, why, WHY OH WHY, did they never release this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AIz9XTy7FI)?

I was so looking forward to it when the trailer was first released.

[Coidzor]

I need to remember to use multiquote instead of good old C+P. But . . . .

SHhh! Deary, you're not supposed to let people know you have CP. :smalltongue::smallyuk:

Well, Tolkien's dwarves spoke a Semitic language apparently, so, well, Jewish Dwarves are older than Pratchett. :smallwink:

Why, why, WHY OH WHY, did they never release this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AIz9XTy7FI)?

I was so looking forward to it when the trailer was first released.

Oof, that does look like it would've been fun for that time period. But, uh... What brings it to mind now?

[Rawhide]

Oof, that does look like it would've been fun for that time period. But, uh... What brings it to mind now?

Saw a poster by the name of Marillion a while back. Took me weeks of it being just out of reach in my mind to work out Marillion => Armarillion (and Armarilion) => Armadillion (failed, backtrack) => Amarillion (and Amarilion, Amarilon) => Amalion => Armalion.

Do you know how hard it is to find a little known (and never released) RPG game when you only know what the name sounds a bit like?

[Dallas-Dakota]

Have I declared my love for you, this month yet, Rawhide?:smalltongue:

Great to see you back & posting again.

[Rutskarn]

Why, why, WHY OH WHY, did they never release this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AIz9XTy7FI)?

I was so looking forward to it when the trailer was first released.

When it comes to RPGs, skillful 2.5D is far more appealing than straight 3D.

[Coidzor]

When it comes to RPGs, skillful 2.5D is far more appealing than straight 3D.

LONG LIVE THE GODS OF ISOMETRIC RPGS! *erects a temple to Fallout and then burns it down again*

[Cealocanth]

I'm getting really annoyed at one particular thread, and I want to start a new thread screaming about it, but I guess a spoilered post here will have to do.

Warning, me screaming at the top of my lungs.
I am not an axe weilding monstrosity! :furious:

[Recaiden]

I'm getting really annoyed at one particular thread, and I want to start a new thread screaming about it, but I guess a spoilered post here will have to do.

Warning, me screaming at the top of my lungs.
I am not an axe weilding monstrosity! :furious:

No, you're not. (Probably). Your avatar, on the other hand...

[Cealocanth]

No, you're not. (Probably). Your avatar, on the other hand...

...is not an axe weilding monstrosity! :smalltongue:

[Rawhide]

...is not an axe weilding monstrosity! :smalltongue:

No, clearly it is wielding a halberd.

[Cealocanth]

...

No. It's an axe.

...

I seriously don't have a response to that. Give me a second to get Sticktheif in the room.

[Starfols]

I thought it was a bardiche. :smalltongue:

[Rutskarn]

I thought it was a pair of knitting shears, or perhaps a sporty pool cleaner.

[Phase]

Wait, that isn't a Mongolian Death Worm in your avatar? Huh.

[Player_Zero]

...is not an axe weilding monstrosity! :smalltongue:


No, clearly it is weilding a halberd.

Grammar police here. Wielding.

I before E except after C.

[Rutskarn]

Or when sounded like a, as in neighbor and weigh, or after a subjunctive clause, or when beetles sing a love song, or when the shores of Aka-Wei are no longer disturbed by the thundering boots of the Garkin.

[Superglucose]

I before E except after C.
I'd like to weigh in on this rule...

[Player_Zero]

Oh get some pragmatism.

[Superglucose]

I thought my answer was at least clever.

[Zeb The Troll]

Grammar police here. Wielding.

I before E except after C.


Or when sounded like a, as in neighbor and weigh,And in "weird", because it's weird. :smallcool:

[Phase]

Dear lord, semantics, all of you. Change of subject, quickly.

So I snapped my first mouse neck today... I... did not enjoy it. I'm not looking forward to preforming the next step of the procedure next time.

[Superglucose]

And people think it's absurd I don't like killing spiders or insects...

[Rutskarn]

So I snapped my first mouse neck today... I... did not enjoy it. I'm not looking forward to preforming the next step of the procedure next time.

Damn, son. Science is hardcore

Honestly, I don't think I'd much enjoy snapping mouse-neck either. I mean, it's not even so much the killing a living thing part, it's just...euughh.

[Cobalt]

Damn, son. Science is hardcore

Honestly, I don't think I'd much enjoy snapping mouse-neck either. I mean, it's not even so much the killing a living thing part, it's just...euughh.

It's the super-aids. They're covered in the stuff.

[Xyk]

Killing mammals is so much different from squishing bugs or even killing birds (though I can't do that either). Most of us can relate to mammals because we're pretty much the same thing. It's like murder! :smalleek:

[Player_Zero]

As someone who wouldn't even consider harming a fly I am quite appalled.

[Teddy]

Well, I'm not especially keen on squishing most bugs, mostly because I don't think there's a reason to kill them. I squish silverfish with a piece of paper to not make things too messy, but I'm relentless on mosquitos. I've adopted a quite original way of killing horse-flies. They're far to large to squish, but they're quite resilient to lesser violence. My sollution is to catch them and decapitate them by pulling of their heads. It may sound a bit macabre, but it's swift and clean.

[Coidzor]

As someone who has been naked before in his life... I have to say, stepping on a cockroach with your bare feet is not fun. :smallyuk:

[Cobalt]

I once went totally ninja on a horde of wasps. Took me a good half-hour to find and pick up all the bodies.

Disposing of them was another matter.

A word of explanation: There is a wasp nest growing in my chimney. Every year they come out to terrorize the country side and a few times I've been actually driven from my house by them. It gave me a huge phobia of bugs in general, but wasps (and bees) in particular. Then, one night, when all was silent and I was left to fend for myself, I slaughtered the whole lot of them in an epic battle where I cursed their names and mothers, families and homes. I somehow cut a gash in my hand on a flat wall when dodging back to avoid getting stung, which I'm still a bit confused about, but I conquered my fear of wasps and purged the unholy from my living quarters. So all is well.

[Rawhide]

I thought it was a bardiche. :smalltongue:

No, a bardiche connects to the shaft at two points.

[Teddy]

I once went totally ninja on a horde of wasps. Took me a good half-hour to find and pick up all the bodies.

Disposing of them was another matter.

A word of explanation: There is a wasp nest growing in my chimney. Every year they come out to terrorize the country side and a few times I've been actually driven from my house by them. It gave me a huge phobia of bugs in general, but wasps (and bees) in particular. Then, one night, when all was silent and I was left to fend for myself, I slaughtered the whole lot of them in an epic battle where I cursed their names and mothers, families and homes. I somehow cut a gash in my hand on a flat wall when dodging back to avoid getting stung, which I'm still a bit confused about, but I conquered my fear of wasps and purged the unholy from my living quarters. So all is well.

Sounds too me that you're using your fireplace far too seldom. The obvious sollutions should be to smoke, no, burn them out of your house.

[Cobalt]

Sounds too me that you're using your fireplace far too seldom. The obvious sollutions should be to smoke, no, burn them out of your house.

You're not the first to suggest this. Unfortunately, I'm afraid that if I touch the blasted thing it'll explode into a pillar of flame and my wooden home will be no more.

Stone chimney, wood everything else. And there's not too much brick between the fireplace and the wood floor boards...

Yes. My house is very poorly designed.

[Player_Zero]

Oh dear. It appears my mother has decided I am depressed and made an appointment with my GP for me.

I do not intend to go. Going to the doctor is always quite amazingly awkward and I have no intention of telling him, or anyone, about my psychological health.


http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4634/1244573500367.jpg

[Dallas-Dakota]

Well maybe that's what you get for shunning humans.

[Phaedra]

Oh dear. It appears my mother has decided I am depressed and made an appointment with my GP for me.

I do not intend to go. Going to the doctor is always quite amazingly awkward and I have no intention of telling him, or anyone, about my psychological health.


http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4634/1244573500367.jpg

Ah, go along. It'll make your mum happy and you don't have to do anything when you're there. I've been to the GP for depression, it's not that bad. Maybe it'll even help.

[Alarra]

Agreed. If nothing else, it isn't likely to cause you any harm. And it just shows that your mother is worried about you. Refusing to go will likely lead to a fight, which will only make her more convinced that you actually need the help.

[Player_Zero]

I don't want to sit in a room with someone I don't know in silence as he pesters me with questions I don't want to answer.

There is Zero chance of this being a worthwhile use of my time and will only serve to bother and annoy me. Regardless of whether my mental health is in question, I have nothing to say to my doctor and will say nothing.

[Zeb The Troll]

The way I see it, there are two possible outcomes of actually cooperating. 1) You convince the doc that you're not actually depressed, just experiencing normal teenage angst. 2) Your doctor discovers that it's not just normal angst and you get the help you actually need.

Whichever case is actually the truth, being difficult about it won't do anything but prolong the aggravation you get from your parental unit until a professional either confirms or allays her concerns.

[Player_Zero]

You have to be a teen for teenage angst. Nice condescension.

Do I get to insult your intelligence now or would you get overly offended?

[Zeb The Troll]

I wasn't intending to be condescending. I have no idea how old you are. Parents just usually don't make doctor's appointments for their adult children. (I wasn't even aware that it was possible.) It was a reasonable conclusion to draw.

[Phaedra]

I don't want to sit in a room with someone I don't know in silence as he pesters me with questions I don't want to answer.

There is Zero chance of this being a worthwhile use of my time and will only serve to bother and annoy me. Regardless of whether my mental health is in question, I have nothing to say to my doctor and will say nothing.

Then say nothing, the GP won't torture words out of you if you don't want to talk. If it's anything like my appointment it will take 15 minutes. I'm sure you can endure someone talking to you for 15 minutes.

[Quincunx]

Oh dear. It appears my mother has decided I am depressed and made an appointment with my GP for me.

I do not intend to go. Going to the doctor is always quite amazingly awkward and I have no intention of telling him, or anyone, about my psychological health.


http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4634/1244573500367.jpg

Put on your big girl panties and deal with it. :smallyuk: At the very least, have the gumption to call your own GP and cancel your own appointment--and deal with the fallout from that.

[Player_Zero]

Then say nothing, the GP won't torture words out of you if you don't want to talk. If it's anything like my appointment it will take 15 minutes. I'm sure you can endure someone talking to you for 15 minutes.
Why would I bother to sit through 15 minutes of awkward silence for no reason?


Put on your big girl panties and deal with it. :smallyuk: At the very least, have the gumption to call your own GP and cancel your own appointment--and deal with the fallout from that.

That's an awfully aggressive reaction to something entirely unrelated to yourself. I do hope that isn't projection bias.

[Exachix]

I once went totally ninja on a horde of wasps. Took me a good half-hour to find and pick up all the bodies.

Disposing of them was another matter.

A word of explanation: There is a wasp nest growing in my chimney. Every year they come out to terrorize the country side and a few times I've been actually driven from my house by them. It gave me a huge phobia of bugs in general, but wasps (and bees) in particular. Then, one night, when all was silent and I was left to fend for myself, I slaughtered the whole lot of them in an epic battle where I cursed their names and mothers, families and homes. I somehow cut a gash in my hand on a flat wall when dodging back to avoid getting stung, which I'm still a bit confused about, but I conquered my fear of wasps and purged the unholy from my living quarters. So all is well.

Can I just say, that sounds like it would make an epic movie.

A house terrorized by the living dead... A chimney in dire need of a fire... This is one Man's quest to eliminate the presence of the foul creatures.

This is...

Wasps in a Chimney

[Archonic Energy]

Eh, I'm a wee bit of a Trekkie, I like to watch TOS, TNG, and I've seen all the movies.


What is this TOS you speak of?
:smalltongue:

[Cobalt]

Can I just say, that sounds like it would make an epic movie.

A house terrorized by the living dead... A chimney in dire need of a fire... This is one Man's quest to eliminate the presence of the foul creatures.

This is...

Wasps in a Chimney

You should have been there to see it happening. If I had set up a camcorder, it already would be.

Let me set the scene:

I stepped out of my quarters, the only wasp-free corner in the land... Knees trembling, hands shaking, fearing for my life because God knows: the swarm is waiting for me. I draw my weapon- the mighty Excaliswatter, passed down for generations- and turn the corner, readying myself for whatever awaited me. To my shock- it was waiting for me! and I stagger back, tripping on the second step and catching myself on the wall, but not at the expense of my blood. Clutching a cloth to quell the bleeding, I charge my foe in a bloody rage, striking at the beast as it dances on the winds of Valhalla to avoid my strikes, flying with a hellish grace as I swipe at the air below it.

At last! a lucky blow, and its writhing body lay on the ground, crawling desperately as it regrets its very existence. I approach, but before I can deliver the finishing blow, its allies- from the room over! They fly as one, a cloud of demons thirsting for the blood of he who struck their brother.

And so it began- the epic struggle of one man and his trusty blade in his working arm, defending his homeland against the invaders that have pillaged his tranquility for a year too many!



If I don’t make this a screenplay before I die, I declare my life to be a failure.

[Dallas-Dakota]

Mosquitopocalypse:eek:

[Phaedra]

Why would I bother to sit through 15 minutes of awkward silence for no reason?



Because it will make your mum feel better? Is that not reason enough?

[CurlyKitGirl]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!
My results have been published, but I'm too nervous to log in and find them out. :smalleek:
*widespread panic*
Halp.

[Thufir]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!
My results have been published, but I'm too nervous to log in and find them out. :smalleek:
*widespread panic*
Halp.

Why does this sort of crippling results nervousness always afflict those who have assuredly done really well?

I don't see how we can help, unless you're proposing to give your login details to one of us to find out for you. Which is a potentially dubious idea.

[Phaedra]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!
My results have been published, but I'm too nervous to log in and find them out. :smalleek:
*widespread panic*
Halp.

Invest in some Dutch courage?

[Exachix]

Curly! Worry not! For without knowing how you did you cannot continue.

Your results cannot be changed now - but do not fear! Panicking about it won't change anything, so why do it? Nevertheless, your results will be good, and you will get what you want.

On the other paw, if you don't get your results and you fail miserably, you'll be late for going through clearing and then you may not get a place and everything will go wrong!

So get your results to get a feeling of elation early on! Or to go through Clearing faster.

Uh.. this post didn't go as well as I'd hoped.

[Thufir]

Curly! Worry not! For without knowing how you did you cannot continue.

Your results cannot be changed now - but do not fear! Panicking about it won't change anything, so why do it? Nevertheless, your results will be good, and you will get what you want.

On the other paw, if you don't get your results and you fail miserably, you'll be late for going through clearing and then you may not get a place and everything will go wrong!

So get your results to get a feeling of elation early on! Or to go through Clearing faster.

Uh.. this post didn't go as well as I'd hoped.

Psst. Curly's just finished her first year of uni. Getting a place and going through clearing are not really issues for her at this point.

[CurlyKitGirl]

What is this TOS you speak of?
:smalltongue:

:smallfrown:
It's fun, sometimes cheesy, sometimes very cheesy and sometimes awesome.
Then again, you refuse to believe the series that started Star Trek exists, so there's no point in telling you.
Because you'll assume I invented it all, just for you.
I did by the way.


Why does this sort of crippling results nervousness always afflict those who have assuredly done really well?

I don't see how we can help, unless you're proposing to give your login details to one of us to find out for you. Which is a potentially dubious idea.


Invest in some Dutch courage?

Ohmysweetbabyjeebus.
I did it. No Dutch courage (or any other courage), just pure unadulterated panic.

Results:
I passed.
Not as well as I could have done, didn't get a First or anything, but I passed.
No retakes for me! No scholarship either, but hey. I passed.
And as these results don't affect my degree I don't have to worry about them not being 100% super-duper-amazing.
Note to self: I should actually revise properly next time. And thoroughly.

EDIT:
@Exy: EXY!! *glomp hugs*
Haven't seen you around in ages. :smallbiggrin:

[Exachix]

Psst. Curly's just finished her first year of uni. Getting a place and going through clearing are not really issues for her at this point.

Ooh. Well.. Then replace "clearing" with "Applying to re-do Yr1" or such simmilar.

...

Congratz Curly! As you said it doesn't go towards you overall mark, but it's nice to see how well you're coping.

And how much you may need to revise.

@ Curly; EEP! Ohhai =P.

[Quincunx]

Can I borrow that swatter now that you're done with it? Some sort of gnat-type insect is trying to turn my herb pots into a gnat house of ill repute.


Why does this sort of crippling results nervousness always afflict those who have assuredly done really well?

By the gods, if that isn't one of life's unanswered questions. . . .I can't even effectively pin it on inability to draw a conclusion from prior evidence, since the feelings of inadequacy forked the scientists just as strongly as it did those in less evidence-based professions. Maybe it's another facet of the (equally incomprehensible) lowering of the self as a social signal for wanting reassurance. If I dwell on that thought I'll get. . .poetic. Already spent three times as long as typing out the initial thought on inserting clarifying phrases and leaching out the metaphors. Poetry and its shorthand devices would be far easier and far quicker.

[Castaras]

Why does this sort of crippling results nervousness always afflict those who have assuredly done really well?


Because they know that if they've done badly then it'll look really awful compared to their normal standard of results? :smallamused:

I've given up on exam nervousness, simply because I know I'll have done one thing not as well as I liked, possibly more. So no point in worrying before, I'll do the worrying and crying after I get the results.


I WANT MY AS RESULTS ALREADY GRAGAHGASGALSFHASKLGASGHGASLKIGASKFJ! :smallfurious:

[Player_Zero]

Because it will make your mum feel better? Is that not reason enough?

I think you may've mistaken me for a nice person.

[SpiderMew]

Im bored. I wish i had a private pool so i could go swim naked or something. My swim shorts are too big for me now, and if i tryed to use them i'd probably end up naked anyway.

[Phaedra]

Ohmysweetbabyjeebus.
I did it. No Dutch courage (or any other courage), just pure unadulterated panic.

Results:
I passed.
Not as well as I could have done, didn't get a First or anything, but I passed.
No retakes for me! No scholarship either, but hey. I passed.
And as these results don't affect my degree I don't have to worry about them not being 100% super-duper-amazing.
Note to self: I should actually revise properly next time. And thoroughly.



Congratulations! Firsts are overrated anyway :smallwink: *proudly hugs her 2:1*


I think you may've mistaken me for a nice person.

I keep doing that. You'd think I'd learn.

[Dragonrider]

Koorli: Why, congratulations. :smallbiggrin:


What is this TOS you speak of?
:smalltongue:

The original series? :smalltongue:

[Rawhide]

As of now, I am officially a business. Scary.

[Trobby]

@Rawhide: What sort of business are you? o.o

@Curly: Congrats! ^O^ I know how hard it is to look at the results of exams. <.<; But I'm glad you passed. ^.^

@Deeree: Yup. The acronym "TOS" refers to "The Original Series" of Star Trek. My dad used to watch that one all the time when he was in High School.

Which is kind of eerie if I think about it too much. :smalleek:

[Rawhide]

Introbulus: I sell my services to anyone willing to pay me enough.

[Archonic Energy]

:smallfrown:
It's fun, sometimes cheesy, sometimes very cheesy and sometimes awesome.
Then again, you refuse to believe the series that started Star Trek exists, so there's no point in telling you.
Because you'll assume I invented it all, just for you.
I did by the way.

i knew it!
see Star Trek started with the confusingly called "The Next Generation" (why Next? there was no previous)

Also Congratz

The original series? :smalltongue:
*fingers in ears*
LALALALALALALALLALAALLLAAA
:smallamused:

Introbulus: I sell my services to anyone willing to pay me enough.
here's 2.5 million... i need a small army in 3 weeks for ... well you don't need to know what for.

[Phase]

Introbulus: I sell my services to anyone willing to pay me enough.

I need some services, how much currency is needed?

[Rawhide]

here's 2.5 million... i need a small army in 3 weeks for ... well you don't need to know what for.

That can be arranged, but the 2.5 million won't include their fees.


I need some services, how much currency is needed?

Depends on what services you need.

[Dr. Bath]

I'm thinking I should worry more about exam results, which should thus induce better results??

[SpiderMew]

I'm thinking I should worry more about exam results, which should thus induce better results??

Nope, just relax and chill. I never freak out over tests and i do really good

[Phase]

Hrrrngh. Well. Well. You never freak out over tests and you do really well.

[CurlyKitGirl]

Koorli: Why, congratulations. :smallbiggrin:

:smallbiggrin:
Thankees! I'm just really glad I don't have to do resits as my parents would've had conniptions. And those conniptions would've had kittens.


The original series? :smalltongue:

:smallsigh:
See DeeRee sweetie, I've long ago given up on convincing Archie that TOS ever existed.
But you should see it.
Very fun. I'm just a few episodes into the second series, and still enjoying it.


@Curly: Congrats! ^O^ I know how hard it is to look at the results of exams. <.<; But I'm glad you passed. ^.^

Thankees. :smallsmile:
I was worried about this one because there's a possiblities of fines along with resits. ANd paying extra to come up outside of university to do the exams again. And stuff.
I wasn't nervous over my A Level results though, and that was my make or break Oxford results. I knew I wasn't going to get a Third, but I was still panicking.


@Deeree: Yup. The acronym "TOS" refers to "The Original Series" of Star Trek. My dad used to watch that one all the time when he was in High School.

Which is kind of eerie if I think about it too much. :smalleek:

Ah see, according to Archie, I've deluded all of you, going back in time (through the Guardian of Forever no less :smalltongue:) and making it so that TOS actually existed.
Archie's the only one who's escaped my dread grasp.

It's slighlty eerie though that your dad was what, sixteen to eighteen - I forget (US) High School ages - when TOS was released.
Unless he saw a repeat.
In which case it's not weird.
Case in point: I saw Thunderbirbs when I was six.


I knew it!
See Star Trek started with the confusingly called "The Next Generation" (why Next? there was no previous)

Also Congratz


Ah, it's because they retconned TOS, but forgot to change the title. See, TNG is meant to be called TOS. Except I went and did some timey wimey ball things, and now TNG is TNG when it should be TOS and TOS exists for everyone but you.
Poor Archie.

Besides, I've long given up on 'Heretic!'ing you over this.
. . .
I should get a Heretic! avatar. Or simply a fainting Curly. I use those two so often.

[SpiderMew]

Hrrrngh. Well. Well. You never freak out over tests and you do really well.

I only care about grammer when it counts.

[Cealocanth]

Electrocution works on almost all bugs without having to run around and catch them. I don't have so much trouble killing bugs as I do killing mammals as well.

[Edit: wow, ninja'd almost a page of posts. ]

[Teddy]

Mmmblgrmbl... Dad shut down computer after I left it for him to check his mail, with my half-finished post on it. :smallannoyed: Well, well, reconstruction-time I guess... :smallsigh:


I've given up on exam nervousness, simply because I know I'll have done one thing not as well as I liked, possibly more. So no point in worrying before, I'll do the worrying and crying after I get the results.

I never worry about my exams and grades. I know that I'll pass most of them with a really good grade, without even studying especially much. I've come to the conclusion that worrying about my grades is a huge waste of valuable time (which I use to do nothing useful at all), since it'll work out in the end anyway.

Actually, I've reached the conclusion that worrying about anything at all is a huge waste of time, so I've simply stopped doing it. Also, I'm disproportionally happy all the time. I guess the song "Don't worry, be happy" was written for me - before I was born. :smallbiggrin:

EDIT: Forgot to say "Congratulations!" to you Curly, so I'll do it now. Congratulations, Curly!

[Dogmantra]

I feel stupid now. An inexplicable piece of twine attempted to hotlink itself from my hard drive to an article I wrote for a site that has nothing to do with twine. I don't even know why it was there. The article then got shunted back to draft rather than going through. Of course, you can't see the twine because it's trying to hotlink from my hard drive, so when I went through with Wordpress visual editor it didn't show up and the note about uploading the image to the website seemed nonsensical.

Man. HTML. 's crazy.

[Trobby]

@^: Not familiar with Wordpress, but did you perhaps accidentally put an href in where you meant to put an image? And perhaps you also accidentally chose the wrong image, out of a folder that was not going to be a part of your web site?

That seems like a very peculiar problem, but also one that could happen. Especially if you're using an HTML editor, rather than hard coding it in a text editor.




Ah see, according to Archie, I've deluded all of you, going back in time (through the Guardian of Forever no less :smalltongue:) and making it so that TOS actually existed.
Archie's the only one who's escaped my dread grasp.

It's slighlty eerie though that your dad was what, sixteen to eighteen - I forget (US) High School ages - when TOS was released.
Unless he saw a repeat.
In which case it's not weird.
Case in point: I saw Thunderbirbs when I was six.


Well, let's see...

My dad was born in 1951, and TOS came out in 1966. That'd put him at 14/15 when it started airing, and in 1969, he'd be 17/18 when it ended. That's just a little bit less than an entire run of High School, so basically for his entire High School life, Star Trek was THE show to watch. Though by the time he was 18, he was at West Point learning to hate the military. Though he still managed to catch a glimpse of the Moon Landing while he was in the cafeteria, so that's pretty awesome too.

And I was in my school's only Computer-based class (basic computing/programming) when the Twin Towers were hit by a terrorist attack. That's...a little unsettling too. I was 14 at the time, and all of a sudden they just brought up on the TV in our school. And to think, we all thought the big event we would always remember would be the controversial vote counting of the year 2000 election. :smallfrown:

[Dogmantra]

@^: Not familiar with Wordpress, but did you perhaps accidentally put an href in where you meant to put an image? And perhaps you also accidentally chose the wrong image, out of a folder that was not going to be a part of your web site?

I had just copy pasted it for a birthday card (yeah... twine on a birthday card, don't ask) and presumably I accidentally hit CTRL+V instead of CTRL+B, attempting to paste the image into the article and since there was no indication that I'd done so, I ignored it.

[Thufir]

I've long ago given up on convincing Archie that TOS ever existed.

And by "long ago" she really means "this sunday just gone".


Ah see, according to Archie, I've deluded all of you, going back in time (through the Guardian of Forever no less :smalltongue:) and making it so that TOS actually existed.
Archie's the only one who's escaped my dread grasp.

So that would make you responsible for Spock?
<3


I should get a Heretic! avatar. Or simply a fainting Curly. I use those two so often.

I imagine it might be a bit cramped if a heretic had to fit into your avatar to be denounced as such. Unless you denounced your cat as a heretic I suppose.

[Trobby]

This is why you always have to test your code before you implement it. *Nods* Those sorts of things happen all the time. Don't worry, Doggie. ^^;

[CurlyKitGirl]

Well, let's see...

My dad was born in 1951, and TOS came out in 1966. That'd put him at 14/15 when it started airing, and in 1969, he'd be 17/18 when it ended. That's just a little bit less than an entire run of High School, so basically for his entire High School life, Star Trek was THE show to watch. Though by the time he was 18, he was at West Point learning to hate the military. Though he still managed to catch a glimpse of the Moon Landing while he was in the cafeteria, so that's pretty awesome too.

That's pretty amazing actually.
My mum was six when Star Trek began, dad had just been born. But as I've said before, mum was a Whovian from the first.
But she got into TNG when it was released.


And by "long ago" she really means "this sunday just gone".

Yes, that was 'long ago'. Very long ago. But oh so memorable.


So that would make you responsible for Spock?
<3

Yep, it makes me responsible for Spock. Just bask in my delicious geeky. Just add it to my list of accomplishments.


I imagine it might be a bit cramped if a heretic had to fit into your avatar to be denounced as such. Unless you denounced your cat as a heretic I suppose.

Well, the cat would have to be the heretic. I mean, what would I do with the cat otherwise?
Now for my avatar . . .

[Superglucose]

I found out that I write like J.D. Sallinger which is a bit odd because I feel as if I'm closer to Adams.

At the very least I didn't get stuck with John Knowles :smallyuk: A Separate Peace is NO LONGER relevant to high school students! Can we please, PLEASE take it off the required reading list? It sits there, plaguing every 10th grade student in the nation, while Hitchiker's Guide presents a totally different way of looking at the world and manages to be off the required list?

[Quincunx]

Generation gap: When my sisters and I rented the VHS tape of Mystery Science Theater 3000, the Movie (for we were cable-deprived and could not see this awesome new show my friends told me about), Dad investigated why we were laughing so hysterically, watched for a few minutes, and announced, "--I saw this when it was in theaters." Cue more screechy, hysterical laughter from the daughters.

Generation gap: It took me years to realize that in this clip (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bqhq53JGOPM#t=7m51s), that the first meeting and "very interesting" were two halves of the same joke. Progress, I suppose.

[Cogwheel]

I found out that I write like J.D. Sallinger which is a bit odd because I feel as if I'm closer to Adams.

Interesting, I find that I write more like a godawful hack.

And while we're at it, reading lists need more Terry Pratchett.

[Superglucose]

Interesting, I find that I write more like a godawful hack.
... John Steinbeck?

[Eldpollard]

Whilst Curly may indeed be responsible for Spock, she can't claim responsibility for Leonard Nimoy. You still have a way to go.

[Phase]

... John Steinbeck?

Dan Brown? Stephanie Meyer? Paolini?

[Trobby]

I found out that I write like J.D. Sallinger which is a bit odd because I feel as if I'm closer to Adams.

At the very least I didn't get stuck with John Knowles :smallyuk: A Separate Peace is NO LONGER relevant to high school students! Can we please, PLEASE take it off the required reading list? It sits there, plaguing every 10th grade student in the nation, while Hitchiker's Guide presents a totally different way of looking at the world and manages to be off the required list?

I managed to avoid John Knowles entirely, mostly because we got to choose from our reading list for the Summer, and my High School english teacher was the awesome kind of guy who would read us actual classics like Catcher in the Rye, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, and To Kill a Mockingbird. AND I managed to get the Hitchhiker Trilogy attached to my reading list because my teachers accept it as a work of fine literature. AND I read several of Shakespear's plays and wrote about them because he's just that cool.

Yes, most awesome English Teacher ever. :smallcool:

[Cogwheel]

Dan Brown? Stephanie Meyer? Paolini?

I have reached a point where any of the above may well be a compliment.

Could post some of it here, I guess, if anyone's curious/foolhardy enough to brave some of that horrible stuff.

[Dogmantra]

Yes, most awesome English Teacher ever. :smallcool:

Oh man, you beat my best English teacher. :smallfrown:

[Coidzor]

Could post some of it here, I guess, if anyone's curious/foolhardy enough to brave some of that horrible stuff.

Do eet!

I think someone misspelled Stephenie Meyer's name. :smalltongue: Gotta remember folks, Utah English spelling rules apply.

[Cogwheel]

Before I start, I should tell you a few things. A little background never hurt anyone. I don’t know what you might have seen before, but I do know that this is worse. We call them demons. Do they look like it? No. Are they demons? I don’t know, and I couldn’t care less. It’s one word that fits them and the way they act, and when you’re fighting or running to survive every day – mostly running, if you know what’s good for you – you don’t exactly have much time to spare for creative naming.

What are they? Well, I can’t answer that, but I can tell you what I’ve seen. They’re everywhere, ever since we arrived. After finally wiping out the small number we found in this place, it only took a few days before thousands of them arrived. We didn’t stand a chance, really.

They look like us, I’ll give them that much. Well, similar enough that you need to be close by to tell the difference. Far too close. They look warped, somehow. More legs, more arms, more eyes, that sort of thing. Maybe that’s why they move at about twice our speed and see so much further. Sometimes, they just seem to know where I am, I don’t know how they do it. But I don’t know how they use half the things they carry around. They’re certainly well armed. Too well armed. They seem to move in large groups, a luxury I don’t have these days.

And, most of all, they’re bloodthirsty. For some reason, they hate us. They attack on sight, and they do it well. I’m the sole survivor, as far as I can tell, but it hasn’t stopped me from hoping I’m wrong. It’s happened before. I wish I knew why they were attacking, but I guess all that matters is that they are. I’ve learned not to care about the reasons, along with a lot of other things.

What else can they do? Well, they can keep their plans secret, I know that much. They talk to each other, yes, or at least they seem to, but I can’t make out a word of it. Of course, any planning is overkill, at this point. They outnumber me a couple thousand to one. I’m not sure how I made it this far. They can’t seem to make any sense out of what we say either… but that doesn’t help a whole lot these days.

And we’re another matter entirely. I’m sure we had names, once. That’s one of the strange things about coming here, though – another reason I wish we never did. None of us remember our names, or how we got here. But that doesn’t matter much now.

I think I hear them coming this way.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

If there’s any kind of advantage here, it’s that we’re stronger than them. Stronger and less fragile. And they also never seem to look the right way – hang on to the ceiling, hide behind something. When you don’t have a weapon, you do what it takes. You get creative. Wait for one to move apart from the rest of the group – you can never take them all at once. Didn’t stop some of us from trying, of course. It’s not pretty.

You know, I used to teach this sort of thing to anyone I found. Not many people around any more. So right now, that means you.

Everyone has their methods for dealing with them. Or had, anyway. Me, I go for the neck. Stop them from breathing, and you’ve just stopped them from calling anyone. Cruel? Maybe, but you learn to do what’s needed in times like this. One of them had a hammer. It has its uses, I suppose, but I don’t want anything that makes me slower than I am now. They’re fast enough already.
It’s time I left, anyway. There’s going to be more of them, soon enough.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’m not sure what this building used to be. I can see shelves, bottles and cans everywhere. It certainly took long enough to find this place. Empty, as far as I can tell, but I was outside for hours. Exposed, unguarded. An easy target, in short. Now, none of them caught me. Not this time.

And that’s where the bad news starts, diary. As I’m sure you know, they got you. Leather, paper… none of it lasts when some idiot starts a fire. Fact is, most of me didn’t either. I’ve got a few nasty burns, but I’ll survive. I’ve survived worse. I just wish the crows would stop staring at me. They know what’s going to happen as well as I do – I just haven’t admitted it yet.

I’ve found a marker in this place. I guess I’ll keep my diary wherever I go, since there’s no paper here. Walls, floors, anything will do. I suppose it doesn’t change much, does it? After all, I found you lying around on a desk somewhere too, diary. It won’t change much. Not really.

At least there’s food here. We need food. Some of us – quite a few, but I guess they thought it was the easiest way – thought it would be best to just eat whatever we can catch. I still haven’t had to do anything of the sort, and if I can stay here, I’ll never need to.

Did I just say that? If I can stay here? I swear, this optimism is going to get me killed. Well, like I said, I’ve found a good place to stay at. I don’t want to end up like the rest. Having to live on what they “hunted” made them strange, somehow. It did something to their heads. Sure, they were all here, just… strange. It doesn’t matter, anyway. They didn’t make it. For some reason, I have. So far.

I guess I better look around, find a can ope

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

One of them managed to sneak up on me with a fire axe. I suppose I’ll just have to pretend I never liked my left arm anyway. How am I going to fight back with just one arm? I don’t know. I guess I probably won’t. As luck would have it, I’m left-handed. Hard to write now. Found a small gun, might help.

Best weapon? Legs. Running away. Speaking of which, more of them coming this way. Bye, Diary. See you soon.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leaped out of second floor. Should have given it more thought. Somehow, they didn’t find me, but I’m hanging here now. Small ledge, safe for the moment, writing on the wall. Getting down? That’s going to be difficult. Wish me luck, diary. Wish me luck. I was never a good climber. Losing an arm isn’t going to help. Still hurts. I hope it won’t get infected.

Who am I trying to fool, diary? You or me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I made it I made it I made it. I’m finally here. I’ve been here for two days, resting. I think this used to be a house. Large. Comfortable. Safe. I’ve barred the door, stacked furniture behind it. Locked the window. Helped myself to what I found – tasted of mildew.

Why am I still writing? I think I know. Do you know? Well, diary, it probably looks crazy to you. No hope of survival, no book, nothing like that, so why am I keeping a diary? To talk to. It’s the closest thing I get to peace, now that I’m the last one left – I know I am, I haven’t seen a single one besides me. I don’t have anyone else to talk to, to see, to hear. Just a diary. I keep a diary to stop myself from going mad. It won’t be pretty when it happens, and it won’t help me last any longer. Sometimes, though, I think I’m slipping a little anyway. What do you think, diary?

It’s been months. Too many months. Why are they still after me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The arm stump was getting a bit funny. And by funny, I mean “ooze and infections” funny. Which isn’t funny at all, really, but we get our humour where we can. Anyway, I dealt with it. I don’t know if a blowtorch was the smartest way around the problem, but it’s all I could come up with. It seems to be alright now, as much as a scorched arm stump can be alright.

You know, I have to wonder what’s going to happen after this. Say I lie to myself for a moment, say it’s all going to be fine, and I’ll find a way out of here. I still don’t remember anything. I’m the only survivor in this place. Everywhere I look, the world’s full of creatures that would kill me on sight. What then? If I escape, what happens? Where do I go?

Some days, “and they lived happily ever after” just doesn’t cut it. But that won’t stop me from trying, will it now? Just keep trying, that’s what I always told the rest. Soon as you’ve stopped trying, you’ve given up. Once you’ve given up, you’ve lost everything. The way I see it, I’ve got enough people trying to stop me, why help them by stopping myself?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I found out that I’m not alone here. Couple rats, ants, that sort of thing. Somehow, they were just like the crows outside. Sure, there was food here, but they weren’t interested in that. I can’t speak for the ants, obviously, but the rats that saw me looked hungry. Like they were going to wait for as long as it took.

Whoever used to live here happened to have a hard hat around. That’s going to do wonders in case anyone decides to crack my skull open. And, given the way this has been going, they will.

Time to keep exploring this place. Who knows what I’ll find next?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I found the rooftop, that’s what. I’ve taken to going up there, once in a while. Fresh air won’t kill me, and it always helps to check if anyone’s around. They are, sometimes, but I’ve avoided being noticed so far. I filled out the rooms with notes, diary, as I’m sure you know. Notes, ramblings, I can’t make sense out of half of it once I’ve written it. The rest is all to do with maps I’ve seen. How to leave, where to go. I’m trying to come up with a plan. I think I’m almost there. There just might be a way our of here. And then? I don’t know. I’ve seen a harbor, maybe I could take a boat away from this madness. One of those small islands, maybe.

The house has seen better days. I got attacked in it today. Well, a few shots took care of the first one. An old-fashioned leap from below a sofa got another, and the last few…

Well, maybe I had to burn a few spray cans. Maybe the room isn’t quite the same. Maybe there’s a huge hole in the wall opening it to the outside. So I might have caught a gas pipe in the fire. Can you blame me?

I don’t care, really. The more time passes, the less I care. About anything that’s not survival, anyway.

Someone’s going to come looking for them, soon. I need to run somewhere else. There’s just an old warehouse nearby, but that suits me fine. Small, confined, but more importantly, dark, with only one entrance to guard. My kind of place.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear diary. It isn’t. When I said one entrance, I didn’t know that also meant that it’s the only exit. This building has no windows. That means if I get trapped inside, there’s no way out.

Guess what? I got trapped inside. Weapons? Lost them, ran out of bullets… either way, they’re gone now. Bare hands used to work well enough, but now that I’m down to one hand, I doubt it would help much. I looked around a little. Found a Swiss army knife someone must have left behind, and a stale sandwich. It won’t do, but nothing seems to these days.

You know, I can hear voices out there. I think there’s at least twenty of them. They’re not coming in, of course. They know they just have to wait, sleeping in turns, watching the only way out I could ever take. Fair? Fairness doesn’t count for much now, apparently. I guess it’s just a matter of how long I can hold out on what little I find here. It’s not exactly a castle, but a siege is a siege.

I’d just like to thank you for hearing me out, diary. I’d be lying if I said it’s been fun, but being able to talk helps. Sorry about the fire. It’s been a long run – I’m not sure how long, ever since the days started blending together – but you’ve helped. Now, I know this looks pretty bleak. We’ve seen worse, though. Remember that time I was sitting on a ledge a floor and a half up in the air? Or the time I got my arm cut off? Tough times, sure, but we made it. We can deal with this, right?

I’ve been looking while I write. There’s nothing here. It’s all pieces of plastic – parts for something or the other. Something I don’t need and can’t use, not that I’m bitter. It just had to be a warehouse full of useless old things, didn’t it? I guess this is going to be a short siege after all. I can’t hold out forever, but at least I can do the sensible thing and wait until night.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, this is it. Me and them, them and me. Had to happen sooner or later, right? With any luck, I’ll be real quiet, they’ll be sleeping, I can finish off anyone who’s still awake, and then I’ll bolt. Then I’ll get somewhere safe. Out of here. Get a boat. Like I said, we’ve seen much worse. I’ll manage.

I guess that’s about it. No need for any lengthy goodbyes, I won’t be long. Time for me to go face the music. I’ll see you in a little while, diary.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two minutes later, the sole surviving undead walked out of the warehouse to meet the mob. Of the thirty-two, only eight were asleep.

Twenty-seven minutes later, the last part of the diary was found, and assumed to belong to one of the human survivors.


If anyone survived reading that horrid mess, I could post the other story I've written as well. Really though, don't do it to yourself >_> Posting this purely as proof, really.

[Teddy]

Not that bad, I must admit. I'm no literature critic, though. I find a lot of texts to be good, or at least halfway decent. :smallwink:

[KenderWizard]

Before I start, I should tell you a few things. A little background never hurt anyone. I don’t know what you might have seen before, but I do know that this is worse. We call them demons. Do they look like it? No. Are they demons? I don’t know, and I couldn’t care less. It’s one word that fits them and the way they act, and when you’re fighting or running to survive every day – mostly running, if you know what’s good for you – you don’t exactly have much time to spare for creative naming.

What are they? Well, I can’t answer that, but I can tell you what I’ve seen. They’re everywhere, ever since we arrived. After finally wiping out the small number we found in this place, it only took a few days before thousands of them arrived. We didn’t stand a chance, really.

They look like us, I’ll give them that much. Well, similar enough that you need to be close by to tell the difference. Far too close. They look warped, somehow. More legs, more arms, more eyes, that sort of thing. Maybe that’s why they move at about twice our speed and see so much further. Sometimes, they just seem to know where I am, I don’t know how they do it. But I don’t know how they use half the things they carry around. They’re certainly well armed. Too well armed. They seem to move in large groups, a luxury I don’t have these days.

And, most of all, they’re bloodthirsty. For some reason, they hate us. They attack on sight, and they do it well. I’m the sole survivor, as far as I can tell, but it hasn’t stopped me from hoping I’m wrong. It’s happened before. I wish I knew why they were attacking, but I guess all that matters is that they are. I’ve learned not to care about the reasons, along with a lot of other things.

What else can they do? Well, they can keep their plans secret, I know that much. They talk to each other, yes, or at least they seem to, but I can’t make out a word of it. Of course, any planning is overkill, at this point. They outnumber me a couple thousand to one. I’m not sure how I made it this far. They can’t seem to make any sense out of what we say either… but that doesn’t help a whole lot these days.

And we’re another matter entirely. I’m sure we had names, once. That’s one of the strange things about coming here, though – another reason I wish we never did. None of us remember our names, or how we got here. But that doesn’t matter much now.

I think I hear them coming this way.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

If there’s any kind of advantage here, it’s that we’re stronger than them. Stronger and less fragile. And they also never seem to look the right way – hang on to the ceiling, hide behind something. When you don’t have a weapon, you do what it takes. You get creative. Wait for one to move apart from the rest of the group – you can never take them all at once. Didn’t stop some of us from trying, of course. It’s not pretty.

You know, I used to teach this sort of thing to anyone I found. Not many people around any more. So right now, that means you.

Everyone has their methods for dealing with them. Or had, anyway. Me, I go for the neck. Stop them from breathing, and you’ve just stopped them from calling anyone. Cruel? Maybe, but you learn to do what’s needed in times like this. One of them had a hammer. It has its uses, I suppose, but I don’t want anything that makes me slower than I am now. They’re fast enough already.
It’s time I left, anyway. There’s going to be more of them, soon enough.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I’m not sure what this building used to be. I can see shelves, bottles and cans everywhere. It certainly took long enough to find this place. Empty, as far as I can tell, but I was outside for hours. Exposed, unguarded. An easy target, in short. Now, none of them caught me. Not this time.

And that’s where the bad news starts, diary. As I’m sure you know, they got you. Leather, paper… none of it lasts when some idiot starts a fire. Fact is, most of me didn’t either. I’ve got a few nasty burns, but I’ll survive. I’ve survived worse. I just wish the crows would stop staring at me. They know what’s going to happen as well as I do – I just haven’t admitted it yet.

I’ve found a marker in this place. I guess I’ll keep my diary wherever I go, since there’s no paper here. Walls, floors, anything will do. I suppose it doesn’t change much, does it? After all, I found you lying around on a desk somewhere too, diary. It won’t change much. Not really.

At least there’s food here. We need food. Some of us – quite a few, but I guess they thought it was the easiest way – thought it would be best to just eat whatever we can catch. I still haven’t had to do anything of the sort, and if I can stay here, I’ll never need to.

Did I just say that? If I can stay here? I swear, this optimism is going to get me killed. Well, like I said, I’ve found a good place to stay at. I don’t want to end up like the rest. Having to live on what they “hunted” made them strange, somehow. It did something to their heads. Sure, they were all here, just… strange. It doesn’t matter, anyway. They didn’t make it. For some reason, I have. So far.

I guess I better look around, find a can ope

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

One of them managed to sneak up on me with a fire axe. I suppose I’ll just have to pretend I never liked my left arm anyway. How am I going to fight back with just one arm? I don’t know. I guess I probably won’t. As luck would have it, I’m left-handed. Hard to write now. Found a small gun, might help.

Best weapon? Legs. Running away. Speaking of which, more of them coming this way. Bye, Diary. See you soon.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leaped out of second floor. Should have given it more thought. Somehow, they didn’t find me, but I’m hanging here now. Small ledge, safe for the moment, writing on the wall. Getting down? That’s going to be difficult. Wish me luck, diary. Wish me luck. I was never a good climber. Losing an arm isn’t going to help. Still hurts. I hope it won’t get infected.

Who am I trying to fool, diary? You or me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I made it I made it I made it. I’m finally here. I’ve been here for two days, resting. I think this used to be a house. Large. Comfortable. Safe. I’ve barred the door, stacked furniture behind it. Locked the window. Helped myself to what I found – tasted of mildew.

Why am I still writing? I think I know. Do you know? Well, diary, it probably looks crazy to you. No hope of survival, no book, nothing like that, so why am I keeping a diary? To talk to. It’s the closest thing I get to peace, now that I’m the last one left – I know I am, I haven’t seen a single one besides me. I don’t have anyone else to talk to, to see, to hear. Just a diary. I keep a diary to stop myself from going mad. It won’t be pretty when it happens, and it won’t help me last any longer. Sometimes, though, I think I’m slipping a little anyway. What do you think, diary?

It’s been months. Too many months. Why are they still after me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The arm stump was getting a bit funny. And by funny, I mean “ooze and infections” funny. Which isn’t funny at all, really, but we get our humour where we can. Anyway, I dealt with it. I don’t know if a blowtorch was the smartest way around the problem, but it’s all I could come up with. It seems to be alright now, as much as a scorched arm stump can be alright.

You know, I have to wonder what’s going to happen after this. Say I lie to myself for a moment, say it’s all going to be fine, and I’ll find a way out of here. I still don’t remember anything. I’m the only survivor in this place. Everywhere I look, the world’s full of creatures that would kill me on sight. What then? If I escape, what happens? Where do I go?

Some days, “and they lived happily ever after” just doesn’t cut it. But that won’t stop me from trying, will it now? Just keep trying, that’s what I always told the rest. Soon as you’ve stopped trying, you’ve given up. Once you’ve given up, you’ve lost everything. The way I see it, I’ve got enough people trying to stop me, why help them by stopping myself?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I found out that I’m not alone here. Couple rats, ants, that sort of thing. Somehow, they were just like the crows outside. Sure, there was food here, but they weren’t interested in that. I can’t speak for the ants, obviously, but the rats that saw me looked hungry. Like they were going to wait for as long as it took.

Whoever used to live here happened to have a hard hat around. That’s going to do wonders in case anyone decides to crack my skull open. And, given the way this has been going, they will.

Time to keep exploring this place. Who knows what I’ll find next?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I found the rooftop, that’s what. I’ve taken to going up there, once in a while. Fresh air won’t kill me, and it always helps to check if anyone’s around. They are, sometimes, but I’ve avoided being noticed so far. I filled out the rooms with notes, diary, as I’m sure you know. Notes, ramblings, I can’t make sense out of half of it once I’ve written it. The rest is all to do with maps I’ve seen. How to leave, where to go. I’m trying to come up with a plan. I think I’m almost there. There just might be a way our of here. And then? I don’t know. I’ve seen a harbor, maybe I could take a boat away from this madness. One of those small islands, maybe.

The house has seen better days. I got attacked in it today. Well, a few shots took care of the first one. An old-fashioned leap from below a sofa got another, and the last few…

Well, maybe I had to burn a few spray cans. Maybe the room isn’t quite the same. Maybe there’s a huge hole in the wall opening it to the outside. So I might have caught a gas pipe in the fire. Can you blame me?

I don’t care, really. The more time passes, the less I care. About anything that’s not survival, anyway.

Someone’s going to come looking for them, soon. I need to run somewhere else. There’s just an old warehouse nearby, but that suits me fine. Small, confined, but more importantly, dark, with only one entrance to guard. My kind of place.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear diary. It isn’t. When I said one entrance, I didn’t know that also meant that it’s the only exit. This building has no windows. That means if I get trapped inside, there’s no way out.

Guess what? I got trapped inside. Weapons? Lost them, ran out of bullets… either way, they’re gone now. Bare hands used to work well enough, but now that I’m down to one hand, I doubt it would help much. I looked around a little. Found a Swiss army knife someone must have left behind, and a stale sandwich. It won’t do, but nothing seems to these days.

You know, I can hear voices out there. I think there’s at least twenty of them. They’re not coming in, of course. They know they just have to wait, sleeping in turns, watching the only way out I could ever take. Fair? Fairness doesn’t count for much now, apparently. I guess it’s just a matter of how long I can hold out on what little I find here. It’s not exactly a castle, but a siege is a siege.

I’d just like to thank you for hearing me out, diary. I’d be lying if I said it’s been fun, but being able to talk helps. Sorry about the fire. It’s been a long run – I’m not sure how long, ever since the days started blending together – but you’ve helped. Now, I know this looks pretty bleak. We’ve seen worse, though. Remember that time I was sitting on a ledge a floor and a half up in the air? Or the time I got my arm cut off? Tough times, sure, but we made it. We can deal with this, right?

I’ve been looking while I write. There’s nothing here. It’s all pieces of plastic – parts for something or the other. Something I don’t need and can’t use, not that I’m bitter. It just had to be a warehouse full of useless old things, didn’t it? I guess this is going to be a short siege after all. I can’t hold out forever, but at least I can do the sensible thing and wait until night.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, this is it. Me and them, them and me. Had to happen sooner or later, right? With any luck, I’ll be real quiet, they’ll be sleeping, I can finish off anyone who’s still awake, and then I’ll bolt. Then I’ll get somewhere safe. Out of here. Get a boat. Like I said, we’ve seen much worse. I’ll manage.

I guess that’s about it. No need for any lengthy goodbyes, I won’t be long. Time for me to go face the music. I’ll see you in a little while, diary.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two minutes later, the sole surviving undead walked out of the warehouse to meet the mob. Of the thirty-two, only eight were asleep.

Twenty-seven minutes later, the last part of the diary was found, and assumed to belong to one of the human survivors.


If anyone survived reading that horrid mess, I could post the other story I've written as well. Really though, don't do it to yourself >_> Posting this purely as proof, really.

I survived! Here's what I think:

That was a good twist! I guessed there was a twist, but I didn't guess what it was. I like the writing too, it fit well with the story for the most part, and it's a difficult story to do.

[The Succubus]

Dan Brown? Stephanie Meyer?[/I]

If you "write" like either of these two talentless hacks, I suggest a change in style is strongly needed. And before anyone says "lolz, they sold millions, where's yours?", if a million people jumped on a bandwagon, would you?

I have indeed written things in the past, aside from extremely depraved Crack Pairings - I've written magazine articles, short stories, a rather good comedy series set in a World of Warcraft raid instance and a poem that once got published in a local paper when I was 12. It still haunts me.

@Cogwheel

That was a truly excellent story. The fact that the reader is kept guessing all the way through the dialogue, the pace of the text, the short, sharp descriptions and yet the humanity and emotions of the character still show through.

I demand more. Immediately.

[Superglucose]

Getting published is no more a sign of talent than fame is. Paris Hilton is one of the most famous people on earth, and she has literally no talent.

There's no accounting for taste, and my ex gf is not a worse artist than, say, Picasso, simply because her works aren't worth as much. I feel like she is a much better artist because it is easier for me to feel and see her emotions as she was painting, and I think that her paintings are significantly more aesthetically pleasing.

But I must be wrong because they aren't worth as much!

</minirant> Because seriously that argument of "haha they sold millions" drives me crazy. Art isn't about the money. If you think art is about the copies sold, you have no business being anywhere near the art world.

[Phase]

I survived! Here's what I think:

That was a good twist! I guessed there was a twist, but I didn't guess what it was. I like the writing too, it fit well with the story for the most part, and it's a difficult story to do.

I had thought that you were going for a well-written adaptation of Doom: Repurrcussions of Evil. I can't help but feel that the revelation at the end would have been more dramatic, if only because JOHN IS THE DEMONS.

[Teddy]

...if a million people jumped on a bandwagon, would you?

I don't think so. I don't think there would be enough room for me on an average bandwagon. :smalltongue:

[Quincunx]

Well, of course not. Art marketing derives its value from scarcity, not quantity!

. . .honestly, there's not that much wrong with churning out something merely pretty and affordable. I like being able to own art without taking out a major loan. Still, when there's a compromise between vision and saleability, don't kid yourself that it's not noticeable. That's all.

[Cogwheel]

...Well, that was unexpected. Thanks. Consider me flattered :smalltongue:

Phase, it's not quite the same twist, for a couple reasons. I mean, for one, the main character sorta-knows what's going on. He just thinks it's normal and people are, well, basically demon-like in behaviour. Whole thing's an exercise in perspective, really.

I admit, I wrote the whole thing as an experiment, to see how long it would take people to guess the twist. Now then, the other story. This one's a good deal longer, mind you.

A name? Pointless, but if you insist.

Mask. Not a taken name. Given. Hardly a name at all, but a description, and an adequate one. Unlike many, if I must be seen, I hide. Behind a mask, a disguise, for my convenience. They called me Merciful Mask, sometimes.

As luck would have it, I received the first call in some time. Longer than I care to remember, but not long enough. Nothing in the world can stop me from answering it – briefly humbling, in a way – but nothing forces me to act in any way once I arrive.

If nothing else, the journey will show me a few unfamiliar stars. I will record anything worth noting – very little indeed – in this “journal”. A strange but interesting practice from one of my recent... visits. “When in Rome”, as the people of that place put it.

-Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

As luck would have it, I've been sent. Some village... Crowmeet, was it? Some backwater, anyway.

Oh, if anyone happens to find this journal, do return it to me. You will find my address on the back, and I'm sure some sort of finder's fee can be arranged. Just ask for Gilbert Reed.

Now then, Crowmeet. I can't imagine why a village would be completely unheard from for over a month, but frankly, I care for the reasons as much as my employers do: Very little. Ride in, collect the usual taxes, ride out. A place can be as silent as it wants, as long as it pays up.

Of course, they don't take too kindly to this, often. I've been chased out more times than I care to count, and the same goes for having my horse stolen. Honestly, I don't know why anyone would consider attacking the tax collector a permanent solution, but there you go.

Well, my borrowed horse seems to have recovered – I would have exchanged it for a new one if I were anywhere near civilization – and now I have rain to deal with instead. Never a pleasant moment. At least Crowmeet can't be too far away

-Gilbert

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Crowmeet is odd. Odd, and somewhat unnerving. In a word, it's empty. Utterly empty. Not a single living creature, human or animal, except the occasional crow here and there, staring at me. I suppose I seem out of place to them.

Oddly enough, Crowmeet has an inn. Actual rooms, as if anyone would want to stay here. I have claimed one of the rooms for the moment – someone can be paid as soon as they care to show themselves, I'm sure – and frankly, I need somewhere to stay.

The village is, well... not entirely empty. I think. I've heard a few indistinct sounds here and there, seen a little movement on the edge of my vision. Between the rain and my sleep deprivation, it's not easy to trust anything like this. Still, it wouldn't be the first time I was ambushed. Honestly, I don't see why my job has to be so dangerous.

At any rate, I think I will sleep lightly tonight. I have a sword within reach, if needed. Practically ornamental, unfortunately, since I haven't the slightest idea of how to use it. Still, it should look reasonably intimidating.

On second thought, I think I may help myself to a knife from downstairs. I'm in no hurry to compromise my safety.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Incompetence in an enemy is, at times, more infuriating than in anyone else. The one calling me has no more than the faintest grasp of the procedures, even when following instructions, and most likely has even less realization of what exactly they are doing. And yet, they have succeeded in calling me. Irritating.

Having been forced to travel to this world, I have settled into a few activities to fill the moments as they roll past. This journal, stargazing and speculation on this no doubt pointless new world occupies me, at the moment. Strange that I was content to spend every second of freedom doing nothing, and now I find myself scrambling for ways to fill the time while I travel.

I can see it now, still a few days' travel away. A small blue-green dot. Dull, typical, unavoidable.

-Mask

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Another day, another rainy morning. I hate this village already. The inhabitants have yet to show themselves. I would assume that Crowmeet met a recent raid or something similarly unpleasant, but the village as a whole is too... tidy for that to be the answer. Nothing has been disturbed. All of Crowmeet is perfectly untouched and as it should be, but empty.

Somehow, this place is colder than I remember from yesterday. I've helped myself to some of the coal to fuel the fireplace. I have also found that the visions from yesterday, for whatever strange reason, persist. They have been added to as well – I hear sounds now. Growls, whimpers – woodland creatures, no doubt – and snatches of voices every once in a while. Strange.

I no longer trust Crowmeet. I plan to check the village again in a few minutes – the usual procedure of searching, knocking on every door, checking inside one house out of every few, calling out for anyone who may be around, that sort of thing. Perhaps I've missed someone. If no one is here, this entire visit is pointless. Should this be the case, I will be only too glad to leave this place right away.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

It... it's pointless. Pointless to try. No one is here. I tried. I tried to leave, until minutes turned into hours, day to night. Nothing. No matter where I went – along the road, through the woods or anywhere else – the path always took me back to Crowmeet. Always.

That was when I found the note. Hastily scrawled... lost? Discarded? I don't want to speculate. Not in this state. Perhaps the writer attempted to escape too. The handwriting was certainly nervous. Not panicked, no, but nervous. And cryptic.

“It is done. Only three days remain, now. Three days to my atonement. I will pay the price, whatever it might be – the people will return. The past will return with Mask's blessing. Merciful Mask, who will amend my mistakes.”

Merciful Mask, atonement, returning the past... I don't understand a word of it. I no longer want to. Why did I come here? What is Crowmeet?

Why can't I go home?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

My destination is becoming clearer now. Close enough to make out the details. Dull and uninteresting, as ever. I am not sure what to make of the place I am being called to. Some sort of settlement? The size, from the comparisons I can make, seems small. Still, I understand too little of this planet or the ways of its inhabitants to make any real judgments. I do try to study them, on occasion, to learn more. But those are rare moments, when I forget that in the grand scheme of things, these creatures and worlds are pointless. Studying them is, at best, a useless eccentricity.

I may speak to my summoner, this time. They rarely understand, of course, but a shift away from my native language will change that. None of them will understand this “journal”, certainly.

The planet lies ahead, and I had best continue. I admit, finding anything significant to record in this book is becoming difficult.

-Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Little by little, Crowmeet is changing. A mirror that showed my face yesterday now shows stars. Strange stars, none that I have ever seen, dancing in the night sky. My surprise caused me to trip – I tried to steady myself by laying a hand against the glass, but my hand passed through. Seconds later, it appeared from thin air behind me, lifting me into the air with more strength than I ever had. And then, as suddenly as it began, it was over.

Seconds later, I was standing a few steps away from a perfectly normal, intact mirror, with nothing to show for the experience beyond a slight pain in my neck. I thought I saw shards of glass and bleeding on the arm I had put through the mirror, but on a second inspection, it was gone. Was it ever there? Am I going mad?

Will I ever find my way back home? I doubt it. Not unless I somehow discover what exactly is happening here. Discover and deal with it. Why did it have to be me?

Why couldn't it be someone else?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

I don't plan to make the mistake of sleeping. Not any more. I walked into my room to find a bleached wooden mannequin that wasn't there before. Faceless, but talking, somehow, if you can call what it did speech. “Hello,” that was all it said. Over and over. Stumbling towards me like a ragdoll, muttering “hello, hello, hello” while it did its best to pin me to the wall. All the while, its face... changed. Into any number of more familiar pictures – people who couldn't possibly be here.

Speed and luck were all that let me get away from it for long enough to find my borrowed knife. A small cut in the face seemed to deflate the thing – some sort of gas leaked out of the cut, along with a shrill laugh that turned quieter and deeper with every second until it finally stopped. I admit, as soon as it fell away, I closed my eyes. I couldn't bear to look at the doll. When I opened my eyes again, it was gone.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

My influence seems to be causing some changes in the planet below. Unintentional, but I myself am indifferent to it. It is not a matter of ability – while this is a simple side-effect of my presence, there would be no great difficulty in stopping it. The question is an entirely different one – so far, I have seen no reason to make the effort.

My caller is a strange one. Lost in happy self-delusion, for the most part. Much, in fact, like every other summoner I have seen, and a good deal of lesser creatures as a whole. If studying the worlds I visit, even vaguely and in passing, has taught me anything, it is that there is little difference between them.

I have accidentally drifted near this planet's sun for a few hours, practically colliding with it. A minor mistake that cost me a few superficial burns. The diary was recovered by a simple reversal of time, though I do question whether the diary was even worth recovering. I seem to have precious little to say. Perspective can be a poison – sometimes, I envy lesser creatures and their ability to find importance in everything.

-Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sun was blotted out today. Some massive shape moved in front of it – too irregular to be an eclipse, but I can't begin to imagine what else it might have been. A shadow fell across all of Crowmeet and, I suspect, a great deal more.

The visions are becoming more substantial with every passing moment. One all but robbed me of my consciousness, flooding me with a series of images. A book, with pages carved from hardened tree sap – the amber manuscripts. Somehow, despite never being told the name, I knew it. An indistinct figure, walking, scattering a trail of papers behind him, holding the book. A cave somewhere, most likely a mine, with all manner of strange things scattered about it. Candles and chalks, incense and bonfires.

Then there were stars, and this... thing, flying between them. I saw a flicker of what it might have been, before the vision, in a fit of mercy, showed me something simpler. Something I could understand. A gash, a rip in reality, padded over with a thin veneer of gold leaf. And floating over it, an expressionless, uncaring paper mask. One of these, or possibly all of them, were to blame for whatever happened to Crowmeet. I wish I could think of them as things to avoid and nothing more, but that happy possibility was long gone. If I was ever going to leave this place, I would have to cut a way out myself.

Then came the fifth vision. Doors appearing in thin air, all over Crowmeet, when all this began. Doors opening, hands pulling each and every person through, sparing only one. Doors closing, barred and locked before they vanish entirely. Whatever this thing was, its presence alone all but removed the village's people from this world – I doubt that they were killed, as such, but the difference is, at this point, a technicality.

I encountered new creatures outside, skittering about just out of view, out of reach, and thankfully out of their notice. They... I thought they were spiders, at first. Now, I wish they were. They are much more than that. I can't bring myself to explain this any further.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

My wanderings about the village have brought me to a second note.

“Two more days. In the forest, there are three graves. They watch me. Watch, judge, condemn, blame, as they have every right to. I know they do, just as I know my failure. There was nothing I could have done. There never was. The truth, but weak excuses as well. But now, now I am not helpless. Not any more. Never again. I may not be able to return the past, but Mask can. I have called Him to this place, and He will restore the past. Restore Crowmeet. The people have vanished – a temporary price to pay, and a small one, until the clock is turned back. Mask has almost arrived, to grant me atonement and peace, whatever the price. And yet, one obstacle remains.

And that obstacle, my friend, is you. My invisible follower. The visitor. Like a bloodhound, you follow my every footstep, but only so rarely do you show yourself. Are you like me, hoping Merciful Mask would amend your errors and give you peace? Are you an ally, here to help my cause? Are you another of Mask's angels that fill the village as you read this? Or are you an enemy, here to hinder me for your own selfish goals? I pray for your sake that you are not my enemy.

But enough of talk. Come to the three graves on the morrow, wanderer. Mask will help you to find your way through the forest, I am sure of that. We will determine where you stand once we meet there.

-Nathaniel Weaver”

Do I want to go? No. By the sound of his notes, calling my new correspondent mad would be too charitable. Still, what choice did I have? He had answers. He may have the Amber Manuscripts, and above all I know that I will not be able to leave without the help of that book. I have to meet him. I need to have my answers.



If you are reading this, than here is my answer. I want to go home, no more, no less. Take your cursed village and do as you want with it, but leave me out of your schemes.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Again, I have been attacked. Again, in my room. A skeleton this time, waxy, half-melted in appearance, dancing around me, not running in circles as much as disappearing and appearing again, moving instantly from spot to spot, moving in rings around me. When I tried to run, so did it, only to shriek and claw at one of the beams. Somehow, the beam snapped in half, toppling over and smashing through the floor, knocking out another support. Within seconds, the whole structure came tumbling down, crushing me under the falling roof. For the second time in as many days, I thought I was dead. Again, my vision, as well as consciousness, left me.

And then I was here again, sitting in my untouched room, staring ahead blankly. Have I gone mad, or is it the world?

I hear more than whispers, now. There is music, wherever it might be coming from. Quiet, tuneless, and not from any instrument I recognize. If anything, it seems to be intentionally played poorly, letting out a scratchy, slow music made to be offensive to the ear.

I have gathered up the few tools I can, using them to board up the window in my room and put a padlock on the door. Security? Not by a long shot, not when the things seem to just materialize in the room. But it will help me to survive until dawn. The scratching, croaking and growling outside is sure to keep me awake. I only wish that the building still contained some food.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

More and more, I think of the inevitable conclusion to my journey. Having seen the same results play out a thousand times gives one a sense of pattern recognition. My caller's intent is to, no doubt, demand some pitiful task of me. The motivations vary, of course, but the goal is the same. The day they learn that such efforts are futile will be a good day – I do not suspect the day will ever come, but it would be a great relief to me. I do not look forward to meeting the inhabitants of this world – I am given to understand that the natural appearance of my kind tends to disturb lesser creatures, sometimes fatally so. The reverse is also true – any difference in results comes from simple mental discipline. While I am not so easily affected, it is an unpleasant experience all the same.

They provide a strange paradox, if nothing else. On one hand, excepting a few more petty ones among my kind, we never intrude on these worlds unless we are called. Our arrival, unfortunately for our arrogant summoners, never ends in their favour. We are called, and on our arrival, the inhabitants of the world will do their best to fight and banish a visitor that they themselves brought. Why? What gives them the right?

And to add insult to injury, even after these experiences, we continue to be summoned with depressing regularity. Is there something here that I have somehow failed to understand?

-Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leaving the relative safety of the inn showed me a changed view of Crowmeet. The buildings were collapsed and twisted like so many melted candles, and yet they were still the same as ever on the inside, as if time had never passed on the other side of their doors.

The rain was still present, even if it was no longer raining water. Cold blobs of pitch fell around me, turning to liquid as they hit the ground. It was all I could do not to trip and fall into any one of the bubbling rivers around me. The trees, meanwhile, had strange holes in their trunks. It took me a few moments to realize that these were eyes, crying sap, as far as I could tell. I didn't dare move closer to inspect them. The trees leading to my destination were, of course, quite normal.

I noticed that my knife was gone. Then, looking back, I saw. I... don't quite have the words to describe what I found behind me. A terrible, slime-covered monster, part fish, part crab and several parts things that I have no words for, the size of a large dog. My knife was embedded in one of its eyes. Did I kill it without ever realizing what I had done, or did I choose to block out the memory afterwards in self-defense? Was this another of my many hallucinations?

I chose to shake these thoughts aside, retrieve the closest thing I had to a weapon and move on. That was my mistake.

Eventually, I reached a clearing in the forest. It seemed peaceful, in an odd way, as if someone had went to great lengths warding the beasts away and forcefully keeping the peace of this place. I saw three small headstones, hastily carved with a name and nothing more. I was, besides these three, alone. And, predictably, another note waited for me.

“I apologize for not being able to meet here, but there is much that I need to complete in the day to come. Preparations. I came here to discover where your allegiances lie, and now I know I can no longer trust you. I saw you kill one of Mask's angels on your way here. I cannot allow such an act – it shows as plainly as anything you could say that you intend to stop me. But why would you do this? I only mean to make right what is now wrong. To return my past. Who would begrudge that?

And yet, I have already made my mistake once. I cannot fail again. My magic will tear you apart, and that will be the end of it. You will regret your actions, I am sure, and so will I. I am sorry, wanderer, that I am forced to end your path and life here, but we all do what we must. I must allow Mask to arrive and complete His work. I no longer expect to be saved or absolved. I have fallen too far for that. All I want now is for the past to be returned, with or without me. They must live.

Goodbye, wanderer.”

I dropped the note, hands shaking, only to see a door behind me. A door like those I saw in my vision, and yet different. A floating, massive steel door, covered from top bottom in dozens, even hundreds of intricate engravings. Slowly, it swung open.

I tried to back away, but the eye... the massive eye staring at me from the other side froze me in place. Thousands of tooth-lined shadowy arms flooded out, dragging me in, and the door slammed shut. I was surrounded by shadows, clawing, biting, chattering, hissing, laughing, shrieking. My vision and consciousness blurred, but in the distance, I saw something to swim to. A book. A leather-bound collection of impossibly thin tablets, pressed tree sap covered in engraved words, somehow refusing to break in defiance of logic. I seem to remember touching the book. Swimming to it was the work of moments, in theory – it was within arm's reach, the whole time. But moments turned to minutes, minutes to hours, hours to days and days to months. Months blended into years and decades, decades flowed into centuries.

When I finally began to fade away, I held the book in one hand. Like smoke, it drifted away from me, showing me a vision. A mine. The Amber Manuscripts, lying on the stones. And then, it all faded.

I woke up in my room. Sunset. Tonight, I would leave the inn and find my way to the mine on the edge of Crowmeet. Tonight, for better or worse, it would end. I had no idea how I came from the makeshift graveyard to my room, and I didn't care to find out. I've seen things in those shadows that I never want to think of again. I looked into the mirror earlier. My stay on the other side of the door has changed me. I aged by... fifty years? Sixty? It's hard to tell. I don't expect to see home again. Not any more. All I want now is peace.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's time. I took my knife again – it's served me well enough – but not my sword. I doubt that a weapon would help me in any case. I can only hope that I find the book in those mines. Finding the mine itself is easy. There were footprints leading to it. My friend Nathaniel, no doubt.

For the first time, there is no rain. No sound. For the first time, I am well and truly alone in Crowmeet, with the exception of Nathaniel. The mines... the mines are a different story. I brought an oil lamp from the outside, but this does almost nothing to light the cave, for whatever reason. All around me, the stones were growling and sobbing, shaking, dripping... something on to the floor. I've stepped in several pools of it already. Is it water? God, I hope it's water.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“It is time.” Nathaniel, in front of me, and yet... not. He looked a good deal more normal than I had ever expected. Translucent, and certainly not here in person, but he looked a great deal like anyone else, if rather disheveled. Black, matted hair and the tattered leftovers of what was probably a suit, once upon a time. A little on the tall side, but not overly so. I expected a nervous, jittery madman. Instead, he was calm. Serene, even. I just... I wish I hadn't looked into his eyes. You don't want to know what I saw in there. I would pity him, honestly, if he wasn't so intent on killing me.

“Mask's arrival is only minutes away. You are too late, my friend. Far too late. I don't pretend to know how you survived yesterday, but it hardly matters now. The hour of change is here. The clock will be turned back at long last. Merciful Mask will bring peace to this place. To me. Whatever your cruel motives, you have failed. I will speak to him now. Goodbye.”

If nothing else, I have the book.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

And finally, I come face to face with my unwise summoner. First, he gave me praise upon praise, apparently thinking that I cared for his situation. And then, he made his request. I will not write the details here – he wished for hope, for absolution, for the righting of wrongs. He wished for forgiveness from others, for help. More than anything else, he wished for the past. At any cost.

I gave him none of these things.

His first mistake was summoning me. His second mistake was presuming that I would act as his servant or even benefactor in this, granting his requests. Always, my summoners see through a thick lens of self-delusion, assuming that the powers they call to want nothing more than to do their work. And always, they find themselves mistaken. Ordinarily, I might have returned to the stars and left it at that, but I thought – most likely mistakenly – that making an example of my former captor might serve as a caution to other summoners and afford him some rest.

Dealing with him will be pitifully easy, after which I will be free to return home.

-Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

For minutes on end, almost a full half hour of walking through the mine, I heard sounds guiding me toward what I assume is my destination. Ripping, tearing sounds, thunderous shockwaves that feel as if they might collapse these caves at any moment. Crackling, snapping and hissing. And in it all, not a single human sound.

And then... then Weaver, or whatever he had become, came to explain matters to me. The same translucent figure as before, but so very different. Ripped apart in so many places, bleeding and wheezing, flickering in and out of reality and sight. Some sort of large black spike, to add to everything else, had impaled him, and he still had the strength to contact me.

“I'm sorry. I never meant to leave this to you, but... I was wrong. Terribly wrong – only now do I realize that I was lost in a greater being's game – one which I then lost. Please, you have to...”

Weaver flickered again, rapidly dissolving from the outside, layer by layer, but still managing to talk. With all due respect to the man, I had to look away.

“I was wrong to ever attempt to reach my goals. The book. I pray you have the book, my friend. I am lost. And without it, you are lost. We are all lost. Find the book. Find it and-”

And he was gone, perfectly in line with my luck since entering Crowmeet. I had the book, and began paging through it as I walked on. The manuscripts, at least, were surprisingly easy to navigate. Unfortunately, it was all magic. All of it. Spells of summoning, wards to place, and among everything else, my target – a spell of banishment. Of course, magic is all very well for those used to it, but there would be a price for someone like me. Nathan paid a hundred times over for his attempts. What would my price be? Does it even matter by now?

You might wonder why I still stop to write in my diary. I no longer expect to leave Crowmeet. The least I can do is ensure that this does not go to waste. If nothing else, I can create a record, a warning. And, hopefully, something that will mean I'm not completely forgotten.

I see lights ahead. This may be my final entry.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The moment I deal with him, an intruder comes. Worse, he has the book that began this ordeal in the first place. While I intend to leave in any case, that will take time. I have been banished before. It is not an experience I care to repeat. This may take caution.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

There is a circle – a simple double circle – drawn in red chalk on the ground. Nathaniel worked with what he had. Candles were everywhere, mostly knocked over by rubble. Small fires dotted the walls and ceiling, when they should have had nothing to burn there. Nathaniel's body was, mercifully, nowhere to be found. In the middle of the room was Mask himself. True to its title, it took the shape I had seen in my visions. An expressionless paper mask. But this was a short-lived disguise. A ripping sound echoed through the room, followed by a long shriek. I put my hands to my ears, only to feel them being stuck there. My ears were bleeding.

I looked up and... the thing that took the paper mask's place defied description. Changing by the second, it was everything at once, and at the same time, nothing at all. I couldn't begin to understand it. How could something like this even exist? I looked away as soon as I could, but the damage was done. It began to send me visions – visions and emotions. Was this its language? I saw Nathaniel, first, and felt its rage. Then there were stars, and an odd sense of longing – I failed to understand this, at the time.

Then, a vision of myself, of Crowmeet, of the world. Revulsion would be the wrong word. A vague annoyance, perhaps, but more than anything, I felt apathy. We were beneath this thing, whatever it might be. It could barely even bring itself to care about anything so insignificant. And yet, in the tide of visions, it let slip one that it had meant to keep to itself. I saw the Manuscripts, saw the shining amber pages, and felt fear. That was my reminder.

I began to recite the banishment, as well as I could. Not quickly. To make a single mistake would cost me far more than time. As much as I wanted to hurry, it would have done no good. The elaborate messages turned into roars and growls, and then...

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“This,” I heard him cough out, “is our world. You are not welcome in our world.” Their world. If there is anything these creatures all have in common, it is ignorance. Blissful ignorance, arrogance and blindness to the world as it is. I envy them, sometimes.

His weapon was a book. Mine was perspective. I showed him a glimpse through my eyes. I had to stop him from completing the spell, but the best option I had to hand, even faster than simply ending his life, was what I myself had. I am adjusted to this perspective, to knowing my place in the world. Few others are. Seconds later, I saw him fall.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The significance of what Mask showed me is beyond anything I can do justice to with a description. I finally realize why it chooses lies and disguises. The truth is a weapon.

I saw, from another viewpoint, this room. Then, the cave. Then, Crowmeet. After a few seconds, I was seeing the entire nation, then this continent, then the world. And then, the world shrank away, and I saw. World after world after world, swimming in a sea of night and stars. Seen from further away, they were, again, only part of a single spinning arm in a vast disc. And from further away, even that became invisible, to say nothing of the small, blue dot that was the entire world I know and more.

There are things I was never meant to see, and Mask has shown them to me. The shock was too much. I collapsed on the spot, dropping the book and clutching my head. The spell had failed, but it had drained me all the same.

Then I saw more visions, as the creature started to fade away, passing through the ceiling of the mine. Mask, trying to leave, and a feeling of... history. The past. Mask being dragged to this world with a feeling of annoyance, regret. History, again. Mask meaning to leave this planet the moment he had dealt with Nathaniel. The book. Fear. Pain. And then, Mask leaving now, drifting away.

And too late, far too late, I realized that I had changed nothing at all. Mask had always meant to leave and never come back. What did I do? Subject myself to visions I never wanted to see, and drain my life away, first with the door, now with this spell. All for nothing. Strange that in the end, for all our differences, we all had the same goals in mind. Nathaniel was already where he wanted to be, he only wanted the past returned, so that he could be home again, as he remembered it. Mask and I, on the other end, as far apart as two living things can ever be... well, we only ever wanted to go home.

Ironic, really. Now, with the roads from Crowmeet finally open, I'm in no state to leave. Still, at least I can walk out of the village, if not all the way back home. Something has happened to my horse. I don't intend to speculate, but riding back would have been out of the question in any case.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

With the banishment carefully avoided, I am finally free. For now. Free to roam the stars again, unchained by anything or anyone in the universe.

I have, if nothing else, learned one thing from the summoning. This will be my last entry in the diary. I have come to realize that nothing at all is significant enough to commit to these pages. The journal, as such, is worthless. I will discard it and let it float where it may. I only hope that the caution I left in the form of my summoner's fate will, at least, delay the next occasion. But true to my title, I have spared all but my captor. The others? Their planet continues, untouched. The one who attempted to banish me brought the bulk of the harm upon himself. His mind may have cracked under the strain of the visions I showed him, but that is all.

And with that, I break my tie with this diary. A pointless eccentricity, though it did pass the time for a brief while.

-Merciful Mask

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

The roads are clear. Finally, the roads are clear. I can leave, and yet...

I sit almost two miles outside the village now. The spell, failure though it might have been, drained me. I'm too weak to continue. Far too weak. It would be better if I could comfort myself with the thought that I accomplished some heroic act here, but in the end, I did nothing. Nathaniel and I both did nothing. Still, I created.. a new headstone, by the other three. There was nothing to bury, but it might bring him some peace, if nothing else. I burned the Amber Manuscripts. It seemed the best thing to do with a book like that.

There are birds circling overhead, watching me. Many birds. I suppose they're right, this time. They can see a future meal, and I'm inclined to agree with them. Crowmeet. I suppose, looking up from where I'm sitting, there must be more to the name than anyone ever expected.

I don't expect to survive the day. If anyone finds this, please, take it back to my home. If nothing else, there are people who deserve to know what happened to me. But please, don't try to look any further into this.

I've learned, in my time here, that we live on a small, fragile island built from what little we know and understand. It's a small island, and nothing is stopping us from striking out on a raft, but we were never meant to move far from it. If we do, we never have long before the storms find us.

I suspect that this will be my last entry. There's a tree to lean against, here. If I can't have survival, at least I will have peace. I feel... tired, after everything that happened. So terribly, terribly tired. It's time I had some sleep. Some rest. Some closure. I would never make it back home anyway.

And this... well, I suppose this is my story. Good night.

-Gilbert Reed

Slightly better, in my opinion, and certainly more recent, but hacktastic all the same. Thoughts?




Edit: By the way, after writing the first story? Sat down to play a bit of L4D. I'm a horrid little hypocrite, I know :smalltongue:

[Superglucose]

This is my submission to the hack's corner. (http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2733802/1/A_Friend) Its writing style is that of "Edgar Allen Poe" apparently.

[Nomrom]

If you think art is about the copies sold, you have no business being anywhere near the art world.

Which is why I'm not allowed in the art world. The only reason I'd try would be in the hopes of making millions of dollars.

[Superglucose]

I'm ina wonderfully weird mood and want nothing more than for someone to be superciliously silly with me and my asinine alliteration.

No seriously I'm stopping that now because it bugs the crap out of me... BUT LET'S DANCE AND SING! Just for lulz.

(and that, my friends, is why people can't tell when I'm drunk)

[Player_Zero]

Introbulus: I sell my services to anyone willing to pay me enough.

If you know what I mean.

[CurlyKitGirl]

I'll feel like being creatively eloquent, but my idle fingers drift too slowly to keep up with my dancing thoughts and creations.
Too slow to catch the graceful pirouettes and darings twists, my fingers - ink-stained and tired - can merely glimpse the faintest afterimage of what my imagination has choreographed.
I try to sketch a dance, and as it was fated, my picture is doomed from the start to be but swirls of colour skipping brokenly across the canvas, always a pale imitation of the dance within.
If only I wasn't so tired that my only manner of creation could barely keep up with even the slowest and most careful thought moving, as if in stop-motion across a gloomily gothic sky.

The thought trickling onto this paper through my drowsing fingers is this:

I need to watch Nightmare Before Christmas again.

[Superglucose]

*grabs cutekittygirl and starts pretending like he knows how to dance with her*

YOU! YOU SHALL DO! Let us go forth and pave a path of strangeness across the land! All will weep before the absurdity that is SUperGlucose and CuteKittyGirl!

Or maybe your name is CurlyKittyGirl... I can't remember.

CurlyKitGirl. Sheesh. I have problems.

Also your bloody profile says you like COMPUTERS, SUPERNATURAL, and HOCKEY?!?!?! Wtf is this opposite world? OR something. It just disturbs me because I have found exactly 0 nerdy people who like sports... except my GM but he's not someone I'd really hang out with.

[Eldpollard]

In all fairness though, hockey is pretty rad. It's a shame I only get to watch it every four years when the winter olympics are on.

[Superglucose]

Eld, I'm going to give you fair warning: I intend to browse your blog but don't intend to read it consistently. I dunno why I just don't really dig the blog scene... I think it was a few ex's that turned me off. The first who RAGED at blogs that I posted for no good reason and the second who posted bull.

But yeah!

[absolmorph]

Eld, I'm going to give you fair warning: I intend to browse your blog but don't intend to read it consistently. I dunno why I just don't really dig the blog scene... I think it was a few ex's that turned me off. The first who RAGED at blogs that I posted for no good reason and the second who posted bull.

But yeah!
WARNING: BIG PICTURE!
(It didn't look that big when I found it!)

I GOT POSTED?!
http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/strollerderby/ChargingBull.JPG

[Thufir]

Also your bloody profile says you like COMPUTERS, SUPERNATURAL, and HOCKEY?!?!?! Wtf is this opposite world? OR something. It just disturbs me because I have found exactly 0 nerdy people who like sports... except my GM but he's not someone I'd really hang out with.

Hey, when I was 12, I was one of the best U13 400m runners in the county. Also sports can be fun. Just I never really got into them seriously.

[Starfols]

If you know what I mean.

The money is on it's way, sweety.

[Dragonrider]

And apparently I write like Stephen King. Short sentences and few adverbs.

[Player_Zero]

And apparently I write like Stephen King. Short sentences and few adverbs.

I got Lovecraft. (http://iwl.me/)

Though I'm sure Kafka would be more befitting, though my style is far from germanic style.

[SpiderMew]

I got Lovecraft. (http://iwl.me/)

Though I'm sure Kafka would be more befitting, though my style is far from germanic style.

I used that site and got Douglas Adams

[Player_Zero]

I'm sure it probably analyses quite stupidly, but it's quite entertaining to write something out like that.

[Froogleyboy]

Cool, I got HP Lovecraft!

[Starfols]

I got Robert Louis Stevenson. :smallbiggrin:

the first time.. putting things through it has become an addiction.

[Cogwheel]

First story: Arthur Conan Doyle.

Second: Dan Brown. Dan Brown.



If it wasn't for my writing actually being that terrible, I'd think I got insulted by a machine.

Edit: Some PbP posts say I'm James Joyce.

[KenderWizard]

First story: Arthur Conan Doyle.

Second: Dan Brown. Dan Brown.


You poor soul...

Still Conan Doyle's pretty awesome!

[Cogwheel]

You poor soul...

Still Conan Doyle's pretty awesome!

I'm nothing like him, though :smalltongue: Completely different style.

Basically, it's as insightful as any internet quiz. Ah well.

[Cealocanth]

I entered an excerpt from my novel. I got Steven King.

[Lillith]

AAAAAAHHHHH! It's official! I'm missing pieces of my puzzle. *sobs* :smallsigh:

[Superglucose]

Mr. Rogers, welcome to my list of personal heroes.

[Zeb The Troll]

Mr. Rogers, welcome to my list of personal heroes.Any particular reason? Or did you just enjoy today's xkcd? :smallcool:

[Thajocoth]

Mr. Rogers, welcome to my list of personal heroes.

Did you know he was a sniper for the marines? (I think it was the marines...) War tattoos under that sweater...

[Superglucose]

Any particular reason? Or did you just enjoy today's xkcd? :smallcool:
Started with today's XKCD and I started looking up more on him. He personifies everything I want to be when I have my own kids some day.


Did you know he was a sniper for the marines? (I think it was the marines...) War tattoos under that sweater...
No, no he wasn't. Very common myth.

[Thajocoth]

No, no he wasn't. Very common myth.

I hope you're right.

[Zeb The Troll]

It was a myth. (http://www.snopes.com/radiotv/tv/mrrogers.asp)