[Nexus] Lulz Bar and Grill 2: Now with ice cream!

[happyturtle]

This greasy little diner is just outside the Empire borders, but easily reachable from either Town or Inside. The light is dim, the air is filled with cigarette smoke, the kitchen is filthy, and the patrons are rowdy. But it serves the best coffee in town, and their omelets and hashbrowns are to die for. Also pie. Also they have pie. Also ice cream! Drinks are available, but ask for anything more complex than a gin and tonic and you can expect to hear grumbling from the staff. There's a defibrillator hanging on the wall.

NPC's can be godmodded by anyone. Women speak in orange, men in gray.

Sheree Lulz: A good ole girl in her fifties, hair dyed red with gray roots is behind the bar.
Travis Lulz: The portly, balding, short order cook in a greasy apron works the grill.

Feel free to introduce other waiters/waitresses as desired. And if you're clever enough to make them talk in diner slang, that's awesome.

Enjoy!

Rules:
1. No godmodding (except the staff, as above)
2. See 1

Edit: Thanks to Raistlin, apparently there are now rooms for rent upstairs. Wheee! :smallwink:

Fix-Everything button supplied by these guys (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=7873959&postcount=686):



Dukt Ape Industries: We Fix Everything

Lulz 1 (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=100837)

[Lord Magtok]

Hey look, it's Happy and Magtok! They're...Hey, shouldn't you two be off trying to stop the end of the world? What the heck are you two doing in here? :smallconfused:

Cookies and cream, please. Two scoops, in a cone.

...Oh. Slacking off and getting ice cream, I see. Lazy. :smallannoyed:

[happyturtle]

"Strawberry milkshake, extra large." :smallsmile: Happy says.

Yeah. Laaaaaazy.

[Thanatos 51-50]

The very atmosphere in Lulz changed.
The air felt like it was being sucked out of the room, even as the humidity spiked and the heat climbed.
The Ice cream melted.
All of it. Melty and gone.

And the doorway exploded from outside, riding the head of a lightning bolt, which promptly proceeded to crush a NPC under its speed and weight.
there was quite a gratuitous amount of blood.
Not half a second after, as if he had teleported inside, a light blue skinned man/goat/bird of prey monstrosity with four arms flew inside, electricity crackling from every individual air molecule, the blood of various specie dripping from every appendage.
The creature then, like the predetor it was, proceeded to rip into the nearest NPC with his large, taloned hands even as electrcity arced about the room frying bystanders fleeing in a panic and shooting sparks towards any exposed flamable surfaces.
In but a blink, the world became a blur of fire, electricty, and blood, with the beast at its centre.

[happyturtle]

Happy pushes Magtok behind her, instinctively filling her role as the party meatshield as she absorbs some electrical damage.

"Oh for pete sake, I wanted a god damned milkshake!" :smallfurious:

[Lord Magtok]

Magtok probably gets pushed back a bit farther than Happy expected, given that he was still grumbling over the lost of ice cream he spent good money on only a moment ago and was entirely unprepared for it.

It's...blue. And sparkly.

...Did Shepherd send James Cameron to kill us?

In spite of the jokes, Magtok wastes no time in catching himself on a surviving chair and pulling himself off the floor to avoid being grounded, whilst his other arm reaches into his robes for some sort of relevant weapon for this sort of...whatever it is.

[Thanatos 51-50]

In response to the loud protests and the self-sacrificing attitude of the Barbarian, the Deamon's attack brought it around, driving a blood-tipped talon at Happy's chest at an unnatural speed, even as the electricity surrounding it continued to both burn the place and murder NPCs.

[happyturtle]

I doubt there are many npcs left to be murdered. It isn't a very large diner. :smalltongue:

Sheree and Travis, of course, dove into their Plot Exclusion Bubble, which perfectly protected named npcs from any nasty repercussions of having PCs about.

The daemon's talon goes right through Happy, as her chest goes liquid to let it pass. Unfortunately still taking more zappy damage - she should have just opened up a complete hole, but it happened too fast for her to think of that. But now her opponent is close and vulnerable, and her arms, shifted into numerous blades, like Edward scissorhands on steriods, stab at him from either side.

[Morty]

Dipsnig is approaching the diner, struggling for breath. Not knowing where the beast will head, he couldn't use the tunnels.

[Thanatos 51-50]

The blades attempt to pierce the side of the deamon, but his thick, armoured skin reduces whatever force was behind them to mere pinpricks.
Inconsquential scratches with barely a hint of dark blue blood visible.
Angry, the deamon grabbed the shapeshifter bodily by the waist and focused his electrical power, attempting to blaster her with a high-voltage, high-ampre charge. He seems to have commence ignoring the cyborg and the Plot-Excluded NPCs.

[Morty]

Still struggling for breath, Dipsnig nevertheless manages to take aim and fire two bolts from his hi-tech repeating crossbow at the thing's back.
((Deadtime 4 realz nao))

[happyturtle]

Ah, but a scratch is all she needs. :smallamused: Even if only the tip of the blade pierces, she can shapeshift it to burrow in deeper, like super speed tree root, expanding to cut him up from the inside.

The beast has hold of her, but other than her knife hands, which she's focusing all her control on, the electricity is causing the rest of her to shapeshift somewhat randomly, taking on different forms and probably making her hard to hold onto.

[Lord Magtok]

Magtok tries to hover off to the side and stand off to the side of the beast, firing a few rounds at it with his cellphone (http://www.textually.org/textually/archives/images/set3/nokia-gun-phone.jpg) from what he hopes is a safe distance.

[Thanatos 51-50]

The deamon's healing factor rapidly works to eject the microscopic shards within it at the same speed they're burrowing, even as he swings the arm holding Happy hostage to fling her at the incoming bullets from Magtok's Cellphone.

He ignores the crossbow bolts the proceed to stick out of his back, and channels another blast of electricity at Magtok.
the humidity in the inn continues rising at an astonishing rate, and stray water molecules begin to condense on tiny particulates suspended in the air.

[happyturtle]

Hostage? Don't be silly, she can escape whenever she wants.

Probably...

She stops trying to burrow into him, refocusing her shapeshifting efforts to open a hole for the bullets, allowing them to pass right through her and (presumably) into the daemon.

"Your boss would probably be mad at you for trying to kill me. I'm supposed to be his baby mama you know..."

[Thanatos 51-50]

The tiny shards are pushed outside the deamon's skin just before the scratches close and the bullets slammed into the deamon's chest, squashing inward on themselves and falling piercing only the scantest amount of skin, and his healing factor re-routes itself to immediately eject even those.

The blue-skinned deamon snarls at the shape-shifter on his arm, and charges at the cyborg, leading with the same piercing arm.

The fog in the room thickens. It's almost tangibly restrictive, now.

[UncleWolf]

The Daemon may feel a strong presence come closer before a winged figured lands in the doorway. Jericus snarls as he stands, his electoo crawling and writhing on his purple skin. Seeing the creature, he drops his disguise, allowing his true form to show. His white wings form scales at the base even as his left arm grows talons and scales of it's own. "Turn and face the Broken Hand of the God-Emperor"

He reaches back and unslings the Singing Spear from his back, it's white gems glowing as half-heard whispers, lines from books ages old, begin to fill the air.

As he does so, he flings a bolt of force at the Daemon, trying to deflect it from the cyborg.

[Thanatos 51-50]

The Deamon is thrown bidly aside in mid-charge and angles Happy to cushion his blow.
The creature stop his relentless assault and stares at the newcomer.
It sputters out a short, nigh-incomprehensible set of syllables in a deamonic tongue born of the lower Hells.
"You smell like of of us. And yet you fight me?"

[happyturtle]

Happy goes as melty as the ice cream to escape both the impact of the blow and continuing to be a hostage.

Haha, daemon! Take that! No blow-cushioning for you!

Oh right... and the puddle of shapeshifter oozes away quickly, barely clinging to consciousness. >.>

[Lord Magtok]

Shoot, the gun is useless. Well...there's always the goose, I suppose. Quickly rising higher off the ground and thankful for the failed charge, Magtok attempts to whip out a large honking mallard and fire off a volley of red laser beams in the blue abomination's direction.

You're seriously flocked now, demon.

[UncleWolf]

Jericus has a rough time understanding what it says at first, but as someone who's had thousands of years of knowledge pumped into his mind, he's able to translate within a few moments. <"I am not you. You are Chaos, Filth, and while I am cursed, I will not stand to let an unholy abomination to walk this earth.>.

His electoo flairs brightly with energy as he levels his spear and flies towards the beast, psychic energy infusing his weapon.

[Thanatos 51-50]

the rapidly solidifying supernatural fog inside the bar and grille diffuses the energy and light present in the laser beams. The Deamon's skin temperature rises slightly.
He deftly sidesteps the dive bomb and wills electric charges into existence to attack the flying ones wings.
"This Chaos of which you speak? It is not the chaos I know of."

[happyturtle]

The puddle of shapeshifter is no longer at the daemon's feet. It's reached Magtok by now, where it reforms into... some deformed half melted humanoid shape, badly burned, the form barely holding together.

"Out of here. Get." Happy says to Magtok. "Go."

[UncleWolf]

Jericus clentches his jaw when he's hit by the lightning, but it snaps and crackles along his electoo, dissipating most of it. With a yell, he tries to grab one of it's arms with his daemonic hand. If it gets a grip, he'll dig his claws in, rending soul as well as flesh.

[Thanatos 51-50]

As Jericus's claws rip into the deamon's arm, one of its talons strike Jericus, attempting to pierce his chest.
The deamon does not appear to react to the attack, but his flesh gives off the unpleasant smell of burning flesh.

[UncleWolf]

Jericus is barely able to get a psyshield up to block the hit in time, but it still knocks him back a good amount, knocking the wind out of him. Once back on his feet, he shifts his shield to block the daemon from Magtok and Turtle. "Get out!" He spins his spear into a defensive stance, it's empowered edge glowing.

[Morty]

Shoot. The bolts didn't do much. Dipsnig reloads the crossbow with three bolts tipped with alchemical silver and fires them at the Daemon. The thought to wait until it kills Magtok crossed his mind but was quickly dismissed. Besides, Happy's there too and Dipsnig doesn't want her dead again.

[Lord Magtok]

But I have clo-

Magtok glances at Happy's face, and immediately figures he'd better do as she says. A telewarp portal is thrown up right next to him, and he hurriedly tries to close it back up behind him after stepping through.

[happyturtle]

Happy is right behind Magtok, intending to retreat with him, when the telewarp portal starts to close. :smalleek: "Wait!" she calls, reaching a hand through, which is going to get chopped off if Maggy doesn't re-open it fast.

[Lord Magtok]

Oh shoot, I thought you meant...nevermind.

The thing immediately starts reopening, possibly leaving a mild flesh wound before it reverse. An arm sticks out to try to help pull her through.

[happyturtle]

Happy manages to stumble / be pulled through, and collapses unconscious on the other side, severely electrocuted.

Sheree looks up from behind the bar. "I think it's over now. This thread hasn't been posted in for 11 days."

"I'll push the Fix Everything button then," Travis says.

And lo, the diner is returned to its normal condition, frozen ice cream and all. Hooray!