Introverted in the Playground?

[Zephra]

How many of us are introverts, I wonder?

I've been thinking about this recently, prob'ly cause my best friend is a thorough and extreme extrovert....which obviously leads to many conversations in the line of: "Introvert isn't a personality flaw! It's an alternate personality type, consarnit!" So I've been trying to explain it lately, and what it boils down to (for me--dunno about everybody else) is that for an extrovert, being with people, pretty much any people, is super energizing, and for me it's more exhausting than sprinting. What are some other fundamental differences, do you think? Do you every try to spread "introvert awareness," just for the heck of it? (I thought of setting up a club, but nobody would come! Ha ha!) Strange to think about these personality differences--I was glad I did, though, cause it stopped me thinking like I was missing something social. I keep saying, "different, people, not wrong!"

I know, I know...weird of me to post here after like...four years or something. Life got in the way and never got out of the way, but I've been haunting this place lately...

[Lycan 01]

I think a lot of people on here are Introverted, actually. I myself am fairly Introverted. I keep to myself and my immediate friends, and even then I feel drained and irritable if I've been around people for several hours. After running RPGs for my friends, I usually spend the rest of the day/next day in hermit mode, keeping to myself and "recharging my social batteries" so to speak. My girlfriend is extremely introverted, and has Social Anxiety Disorder to boot. Her best friend is an extreme Extrovert - much clashing comes of this. :smallsigh:

[A Rainy Knight]

Yeah, I'd consider myself an introvert. For me, I think the thing isn't that I dislike socialization but that I feel uncomfortable purposefully seeking it out. If someone comes up to me and tries to start a conversation, I'm more than happy to talk to them, but I have a really hard time trying to be the person who starts the conversation. And when I do talk to people, I generally talk about whatever they bring up in a conversation and don't really contribute new topics unless they're somehow related to what the other person was talking about.

[Mando Knight]

Introversion is common and just as "normal" as extroversion. You run into problems at either end of the scale, but most people who are introverts aren't hopeless basement-dwelling hikikomori (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Hikikomori).

[snoopy13a]

I think the majority of people here are introverts.

I'm an introvert; I'm also shy (practically all shy people are introverts but not all introverts are shy).

[AtlanteanTroll]

It depends who Im with. When Im with my good friends, Im noisy as all get out. When Im alone, Im fairly quiet. School tends to be somewhere between the two, neither here nor their.

[RabbitHoleLost]

Being on the cusp of Leo/Cancer, I'm an Extro/Intro cross. Meaning that I have periods of time when being around people is the BEST THING EVER, and other days when being around people takes a lot of energy and makes me nervous to the point of wanting to cry.
In general, though, I'm more extroverted.
But, looking at my closest friends, aside from mah BFF Leo, I prefer to be around Introverts.

[Lord Raziere]

Hi I'm introverted. when you want to talk, ask me something I find interesting, it'll snap me out my contemplation of all existence and life.

[CrimsonAngel]

I have a few friends and don't realy like being around people... I'm a bit surly. I don't think my parents even like me sometimes...

[Moonshadow]

Nah, people would turn up to an introverts club, they just wouldn't talk to each other :3

That said, I'm very introverted, unless I'm around people I've known for a while.

[Cealocanth]

Thanks to google, I know know what on Earth introverted means. I guess I'm a bit introverted, as well as a couple other people I know. I think I know a couple extraverts too.

[Winter_Wolf]

I'm introverted, but I have my moments when I want/need to be around people and a socializer. I can handle ordinary extroverts, but I absolutely despise being stuck around overbearing extroverts. My threshold is pretty low for that, so they're probably considered "normal" by a large number of people.

Basically, yeah, I stick to myself or a small group of people I believe I can trust and feel comfortable around. I put on my game face when I have to deal with crowds and super social networkers, but I don't make lasting connections with them because I have high blood pressure and the added stress of their company raises it to dangerous levels.

[Mando Knight]

But, looking at my closest friends, aside from mah BFF Leo, I prefer to be around Introverts.

I think it's a bit of an opposites attract kind of thing.

Some introverts like to be around extroverts because the extrovert generally makes more effort to be friendly than fellow introverts, and some extroverts like somewhat introverted friends who are willing to listen as much as they talk.

And of course that's just a horribly generalized generalization, but I think the gist is somewhat clear.

[Starscream]

I was a pretty sad case in high school. Rarely spoke, always reading a book, didn't fit in well. Some of it was because I was a classic nerd in a decidedly redneck-themed school, but I'm sure I could have gotten along if I'd really tried.

College was much better. More people who shared my interests, less pressure to be "cool", and unlike high school we were all there because we wanted to be, not because we had to be.

But I'm still a pretty quiet and shy person. Just not nearly as socially hopeless as I once was.

[Xyk]

I'm very introverted, but enjoy being around people.

I'm not sure where I found it but I like these definitions:

Introvert- is drained by social interaction.
Extrovert- is rejuvenated by social interaction.

I like to hang out around people and have many funs, but afterwards I have no energy left. Like now, after being at a wedding for quite some time.

[golentan]

I am a bizarre amalgam of introvert and extrovert traits: I am endlessly personable with close friends, and hate large or energetic gatherings. I can talk at great length with anyone, but can't initiate conversations. I like being around people as often as possible, and find it tremendously taxing. I will go to public spaces specifically to avoid talking to people, though I'm delighted whenever someone there takes a shine to me.

[AslanCross]

I'm introverted. I'm Melancholic/Phlegmatic, and as such I find any extensive interaction with other people actually quite boring unless we talk about something intellectually stimulating. Then I can go on for hours. The stereotypical party with lots of chatting, dancing and drinking, though? Pass. Whenever I go to big family reunions, I tend to just eat a lot, then take a walk with my brother and cousins outside. I rarely sit down to small-talk with people.

Even at work, where all the other teachers like hanging out at the common table and telling stories, I bury my head in my cubicle to do my work. (The common table's right behind me.)

That said, when someone does ask me questions, I'm fairly open and willing to share quite a lot. Just that I rarely make the first move.

EDIT: Ironically, most people in this country (with its party culture) find me very intimidating. I'm rather tall (by Southeast Asian standards) and have dark, piercing eyes and thick eyebrows, so people often think I'm always scowling or angry. Since I don't talk much up front, people also find me inscrutable.

[Remmirath]

I'm quite introverted, though less so than I was when I was younger.

I can talk to people pretty easily if I'm already in a setting where I'd have something in common to talk about, such as in theatre or roleplaying. I don't think I'll ever be able to understand just talking to random people on the bus or in the street, though.

I hate being completely alone, though. However, I want to spend most of my time around family or close friends. I really hate being in crowded places such as big cities, or being in situations where I have to talk to people I've never even seen before.

I do like talking about things I find interesting.

[ghost_warlock]

Stop bothering me and leave me alone.

[Ponderthought]

I used to be quite the stereotype of introverted, shy, mostly silent, abit gloomy. Didnt work out well in high school, as my height and "odd" taste in clothing (Vests are making a comeback goddamnit) kind of drew attention. Ive sort of evolved into something abit more bitter and snarky because of it. So in other words, an ass ><.

Still get stir crazy around people for to long though. Mall's are out of the question.

[Lady Tialait]

I'm introverted in groups larger then 6. Something about that many people starts to bring out my silent side. I won't talk, I just try to flee.

6 or smaller and I'm extroverted. I guess being a Sagittarius/Capricorn cusp has something to do with that...not sure.

[factotum]

Yeah, I'd consider myself an introvert. For me, I think the thing isn't that I dislike socialization but that I feel uncomfortable purposefully seeking it out. If someone comes up to me and tries to start a conversation, I'm more than happy to talk to them, but I have a really hard time trying to be the person who starts the conversation. And when I do talk to people, I generally talk about whatever they bring up in a conversation and don't really contribute new topics unless they're somehow related to what the other person was talking about.

All this. I have another problem in social situations, too...although my hearing is actually quite sharp, I find it very difficult to separate out conversation from background noise. If I meet with friends in a nice quiet location I'm fine, but strangers at a noisy pub or something? I could be the biggest extrovert in the world and I'd still sit there in silence because I simply can't hear what anyone is saying!

[Don Julio Anejo]

People, seriously. Introvert =/= shy, timid, unsocial or quiet. Extrovert =/= loud, outgoing, sociable or assertive. Shyness, loudness or sociableness are personal traits. They are only somewhat correlated, it's just that shy introverts are more visible than timid extroverts because.. well, the fact that they don't normally seek people makes them look more quite than they would be if they weren't shy. Shy extroverts still do seek people, they're just lacking in confidence to approach others to some extent, which means one thing cancels another thing out and they're not very visible as being shy.


I'm not sure where I found it but I like these definitions:

Introvert- is drained by social interaction.
Extrovert- is rejuvenated by social interaction.

^ This ^ is what introversion/extroversion means in a nutshell.


I like to hang out around people and have many funs, but afterwards I have no energy left. Like now, after being at a wedding for quite some time.
I'd be willing to guess you're quite extroverted and are simply tired from, well, being active and having fun for quite some time.

PS: the definition above is the original one, by Carl Jung. It's been revised since according to cortical arousal theory and fMRI data, but the above still holds true.

[Lioness]

Well, I did the Myers-Briggs Personality test, and it informed me that I was 100% introvert.

I'm not completely. I prefer to avoid most social contact, but with a few exceptions: my boyfriend, and occasionally my mum.

I can also make myself be extraverted, so yeah.

[Mauve Shirt]

I enjoy social contact, I almost always have fun when I'm at parties, but only when I'm with people I already know. I don't like meeting new people. Actually, that's not so, I like meeting new people, but I don't like being introduced to people by friends of friends. Like my best friend's boyfriend's friends, I'd just rather stay out of that. That's kind of weird. That combined with my tendency to be on the computer for long periods of time interacting with online people caused my parents to label me "an introverted weirdo."
But I don't get exhausted after social contact, I just avoid it when it's not with people I like or think I'll like.

[EmeraldRose]

A little of both for me.

Given a choice, I'd rather be by myself and left alone.

However, in work, I have to be very outgoing and friendly, talking to people all day long, and listening or trying to problem solve for them. If I actually go out, I'm mostly the same way.

[Adumbration]

I'd say I'm a little introverted. :smalltongue:

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

I'm not all that introverted. Used to be, but now I'm much more out-going.

[Xyk]

I'd be willing to guess you're quite extroverted and are simply tired from, well, being active and having fun for quite some time.


Nah, I'm pretty sure I'm introverted. Most of my time is spent in my head, even with a crowd, and I do much better in small groups. I find that I require a few hours of complete solitude every day to get enough energy to go be around people.

Good to know that my definition had some basis though. Carl Jung tends to know what he's doing. :smalltongue:

[Vizzerdrix]

I always thought Introvert meant turned inside out. :smallconfused:

Anyways, I'm also an Introvert, somewhat. I've always found strangers to be tiring and slightly stressful to be around. But every now and again, I get the itch to go people watching. Strange, but it is what it is.

[Trog]

I've been both. I was definitely more extroverted when I was a kid and was the one to sort of get all kinds of kids hanging out together. Now I'm mainly introverted. I get quiet in large groups and feel most comfortable with a small crew of friends. I enjoy listening to what others have to say more than talking I think.

[Mauve Shirt]

I enjoy listening to what others have to say more than talking I think.

Same! I'll go out with my sister and her friends sometimes, they're a great bunch, but my sister says they all think I'm weird for just sitting and listening.

[Trog]

Same! I'll go out with my sister and her friends sometimes, they're a great bunch, but my sister says they all think I'm weird for just sitting and listening.
If I'm out with strangers I make more of an effort to talk. Which for me still means I'm fairly quiet - just not completely silent. The end result is the same but it requires more effort from me. Though if asked a direct question I'll talk your ear off. :smalltongue:

It's really just in the big group back and forth discussions that I get quiet. I jump in then for one of two reasons: To ask a question (which typically redirects the flow of most conversations, I've found, for whatever reason), or to make a joke about the subject at hand as it spontaneously occurs to me.

Or, if I feel like it at the time (and not too self-conscious), I'll give someone a compliment I feel they deserve since those are usually well-received. :smallsmile: Though I have to be careful about those too since there has been times when that was interpreted as hitting on said someone. :smalleek:

[Teddy]

I'm pretty introverted. I don't dislike most social situations, but I usually take on a quite quiet role, and watch rather than engage (I'm also slightly excentric and don't share especially many common interests with others). I'm also quite bad at initiating social situations.


I always thought Introvert meant turned inside out. :smallconfused:

Doesn't it simply mean "turned inside"?

[valadil]

How many of us are introverts, I wonder?

I've been thinking about this recently, prob'ly cause my best friend is a thorough and extreme extrovert....which obviously leads to many conversations in the line of: "Introvert isn't a personality flaw! It's an alternate personality type, consarnit!" So I've been trying to explain it lately, and what it boils down to (for me--dunno about everybody else) is that for an extrovert, being with people, pretty much any people, is super energizing, and for me it's more exhausting than sprinting.



Introvert- is drained by social interaction.



I think this is why people think of introversion as a personality flaw. When you describe something as exhausting or draining, that unintentionally puts it in a negative light. It's like you're saying it's a mentally demanding or taxing process that should be avoided.

The way I explain introversion is that socializing is like working out at the gym. It feels good, but you can't go twice in a row. You gotta rest and recuperate afterward.

[Fifty-Eyed Fred]

I'm slightly extraverted, so on this forum it seems I'm going against the grain.

As others mentioned, I like being around introverts despite my own extraversion, because introverts listen as much as I talk. I have a good balance of introverted and extraverted friends, really; I find it makes my life a lot easier to be able to meet up with people as outgoing as I am, and to meet up with people I can do quieter things with.

Come to think of it, balance is the key here, since I'm not overtly extraverted; I need time alone to recharge my social batteries just like an introvert does, though perhaps less time.

I suppose I consider myself lucky. :smallwink:

[Xyk]

The way I explain introversion is that socializing is like working out at the gym. It feels good, but you can't go twice in a row. You gotta rest and recuperate afterward.

Exactly! I am in agreement. :smallcool:

[Niasen]

I'm an Introvert exerting himself to become an Extrovert because he's tired of being inert.

...As soon as you all put away the big sticks you want to hit me with for that line, it is true, I am trying to "train" myself out of being an Introvert.

Its not so much that I find social interaction tiring, as it is interaction with people I don't know WELL. I was never able to get over my shyness when introducing myself, and have this innate belief (founded or not) that I'm making an ass of myself and they are merely being polite not to point it out. This is a self fulfilling prophecy as the nervous feeling makes me mess up a lot and babble or say things oddly. I actually KNOW where this all came from, I just wish I'd get over it already, sheesh.

Anyway, the way I'm attempting to go around it? I really DO make an ass of myself...but in my own way such as self depreciating humor. You'd be amazed at what screw ups you can get away with socially if people think your just making a joke about yourself (and if your quick enough on your feet to actually MAKE one from your screw ups).

From a tiring stand point it's successful. I find it easier and less energy consuming to come up with jokes and humor than to wrack my brain about other topics and how I'm messing it all up. I also enjoy interacting with strangers now. I still don't really have any friends though, everyone finds me funny but not interesting enough to hang out with. :smallfrown:

Enough with the self pity (as refreshing as it was to finally say it), the point I'm trying to make is that you can actually TRAIN yourself to become one or the other (whether on purpose or not), but it should be noted that this change came through years of gritting my teeth and ignoring what my gut was screaming at me.

[Vorpalbob]

I'm... Conditionally introverted. I have no problem talking to people, or being in large groups of people, as long as said people are intelligent. I've had hours long philosophical conversations with random strangers in the library that were far more fun and (socially) easy than a five minute exchange with some dumbass in my English class who looks like a Jimmy Eat World video threw up on him.

That is not to say that all people who subscribe to trends are mindless idiots, as one of my best friends was redeemed from such status by myself and my other friends (he now enjoys a fulfilling life playing tabletop RPGs, discussing Deadliest Warrior, and watching Monty Python), merely that the two traits are paired up surprisingly often, so much so as to almost make a stereotype.

I just find it extremely tiring speaking to someone who refuses to understand anything not said in supersimplespeak or popular slang. Even when I drop a double entendre that would have set an illiterate redneck to hootin', they stare at me as if I had begun speaking Klingon.

Sorry, that was a bit more ranty that you probably would have wanted.

[rakkoon]

I used to be very introverted, now I'm very extroverted. Time changes a man.
I still need my 'staring into the fire' time when I get home from work and I enjoy an evening alone but all in all I like people more.

[Calamity]

Very introvert! I struggle with one-to-one conversations even with some close friends, and I also tend to speak less than my friends when we're in a group (That may be because some of them are just really hyper and don't shut up)

However being in a group of people I don't know is practically torture to me. Also I have a tendency to think anything I say is really stupid or uninteresting, in fact, that's something I do even on this forum.

[SpiderMew]

I (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Is45Lszndw) am (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ul9Sx-gEzus) not (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__6pZWnhixk) an (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J5iT-8IW9jY) introvert (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jS3os_WzLwY).

But my brother is. Thats not to say I dont have times where i can reflect inside myself and solve problems and blah blah blah.
I like being the center of attnetion, and i like being in a leadership role. (I tend to become the group leader when i roleplay, even when i design my character for support)

[Strawberries]

Another introverted to add to the mix. I am one of those people that feels drained in social situations, and I need my space alone - my boyfriend, who lives with me, knows that even if I love him a lot, and enjoy our time together, I need at least an hour a day of "alone" time (usually that means I'm in another room with my head in a book or my laptop).

I used to be very shy, too, but I've grown out of it, at least a little. As Starscream said, elementary, middle and high school were hell for me - I made a grand total of one close friend in 18 years of life. University helped a lot in that regard, as I finally begun hanging out with fellow nerds :smallwink:.

[IonDragon]

I successfully did the "extrovert thing" for two years in Highschool. I miss it, actually. It was a blast. I went out with friends, we did things. I didn't party much, but it was still cool. The girlfriend and I did wild and crazy things in wild and crazy places...
I don't know if it's because life has just slowed down or if it's because I'm not pretending to be someone I'm not, but now I barely ever go out and when I do it's usually quite tame.

I'm pretty sure I'm at least mildly introverted. When I'm walking in public sometimes I like to pretend I'm wearing Powered Armor, or have a shield or something. Something that will separate me from the rest of the world and keep me safe. It's sort of like a mental security blanket, that I hold onto when I'm nervous or self conscious. I do the Powered Armor one a lot.

I don't like to go places with a lot of people I don't know, and when plans change suddenly, I feel very uncomfortable and want to go home. I have trouble making plans on my own, and prefer to just go along with what someone else is doing.

Usually, after an outing, I need to spend some time alone and play video games or read a book with my headphones on.

It probably stems from when I was younger, my step-mom didn't like to let me out on my own because I "wasn't old enough" until I was in Jr. year. Somehow, at that point I was magically "old enough" and she didn't want me in the house doing nothing. Before that point though, I spent almost all day every day reading and listening to music by myself. I also often played with Legos. Often I would listen to the same CD on repeat for days because I didn't have enough allowance to buy new music. In fact, I don't think my allowance ever got over $10 (with me saving up for months). Yes, I am really 21. Yes that means I didn't even get enough money to buy a pack of gum a week. Yes, I blame a lot of my problems on my step-mom, and no I can't be sure how much of it is because we just don't get along. I like to think I'm being as fair as possible, and outside observers agree she is somewhere between difficult and impossible to get along with.

[banjo1985]

Meh, I'm kind of slap-bang in the middle of the scale. I don't make friends particularly easily due to inherent shyness, but once I have I'm as talkative and outgoing as anyone. I've always been told that it takes some effort to get to know me, but it's worth it in the end...I guess there's a compliment there somewhere. :smalltongue:

[potatocubed]

I always thought Introvert meant turned inside out. :smallconfused:

You're thinking of 'inverted'. :smallsmile: To invert something is to turn it inside out.

I am very much an introvert - I have a finite tolerance for human contact, most of which is used up during my work week.

I explain it like cake: I like cake, and if I go entirely without cake for too long I get cravings for cake, but there is a limit to how much cake I can consume before I have to take a cake break.

[Silly Wizard]

I'm fairly introverted myself (Taurus, woo!), but it seems that a good deal of my friends are very extroverted. I can't help but be whisked away to parties by my friends on the week-ends, sitting there awkwardly around a bunch of drunk strangers :smalleek:

[Don Julio Anejo]

I never got an allowance :frown: Granted, my parents sometimes gave me money to do things, but I think Republican senators have an easier time explaining the "hooker" section in their travel expenses budget. This was how it usually went: "Dad, I need $20 to go to the movies." Afterwards: "Okay, I spent $10.50 on a movie ticket, $7.50 on lunch and $1.50 on a can of pop" "What happened to the remaining 50 cents and where is the receipt for pop?"

Luckily, it got better around grade 10 when they decided to give me an actual allowance if I did volunteer work and I got an actual job in grade 11.

[factotum]

You're thinking of 'inverted'. :smallsmile: To invert something is to turn it inside out.


I thought to invert something was to turn it upside down... :smallwink:

[bluewind95]

I, too, am an introvert. Social contact is not only tiring for me, but it can be outright torturous. And if I *am* going to engage in social contact, I prefer the kind where I can quietly slip into the background to rest. This is not to say I can't engage in it... I do... and frequently. I just... don't like it. Unless it's with a close friend, anyways. Close friends do not tire me, and that is the only kind of social contact I really crave.

[shadow_archmagi]

Introvert. My idea of an ideal crowd is maybe 12 people all of whom I know well.

Note that I seem to recall that the difference between introvert and extrovert was explained by the efficiency with which your brain (produces? Processes?) a particular chemical involving social interaction.

It's sort of like drugs.

Some people can drink three six-packs of booze in an hour and not show any symptoms.

Some people get tipsy after a half-glass of wine.

Likewise, some people can have an hour long phone call with a friend and call that their social interaction for the day, while others require at least twenty people.

[Setra]

I'm considered introverted, but I think I'm just shy. I don't mind dealing with people, in fact I like meeting new people, but I have trouble doing so.

[Kobold-Bard]

Well it was my cousin's wedding yesterday and I spent the entire evening alone because I couldn't talk to anyone (have nothing to say, can't maintain a conversation in general) and was terrified of making an idiot of myself. And this is around family; I can barely function at all as a human being around people I don't know. If I got married tomorrow I could invite maybe 2 people. And I probably wouldn't in case I've mistakenly believed were better friends than we actually are and they didn't want to come.

So yeah I'd say I'm introverted.

[Don Julio Anejo]

Seriously, almost everyone, and I mean almost everyone here who's said they're introverted... Well, seriously. Look up social anxiety disorder. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_anxiety_disorder) Again, being introverted or not has absolutely nothing to do with whether you're too shy to approach people.

[Kobold-Bard]

Seriously, almost everyone, and I mean almost everyone here who's said they're introverted... Well, seriously. Look up social anxiety disorder. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_anxiety_disorder) Again, being introverted or not has absolutely nothing to do with whether you're too shy to approach people.

Fair point, though judging by wikipedia's definition I am definitely still an introvert (and now know the difference between that and anxiety), but yeah I probably am that anxiety thing too. Shame I'm too scared of being told I don't have it to get it checked (gorram circle of fail :smallannoyed:)