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View Full Version : If you could cast each spell ONCE in real life...



Lysander
2010-09-25, 05:57 PM
You have been granted the power to cast each non-epic spell in the SRD a single time as a spell-like ability. No psionics unfortunately, and nothing from any other source, but you get all divine and arcane spell lists in the SRD. If a spell appears on multiple lists you still only get to cast it once. Your effective caster level is one. You can summon extraplanar creatures but they won't cast spells or use spell-like abilities for you. One final caveat: you can't create any magical items (although a permanent magical effect like a Continual Flame is fine.)

You don't have to cast the spells immediately. You can save them for as long as you want, and there's no limit to how many spells you can cast in one day other than how many you have left. However once you cast a spell it is gone forever. How do you use them?

Emperor Ing
2010-09-25, 06:01 PM
Wish to be able to use all spells as many times as you want with no drawbacks whatsoever. Game over.

SirLagsalot
2010-09-25, 06:03 PM
Wish to be able to use all spells as many times as you want with no drawbacks whatsoever. Game over.

Granted! You are now able to use all spells as many times as I want with no drawbacks whatsoever. Game over.

PS. the amount of spells I want you to cast is zero

cenghiz
2010-09-25, 06:10 PM
Wish to be able to use all spells as many times as you want with no drawbacks whatsoever. Game over.

Not within the boundaries of 'wish', you get partial fulfillment. You can cast another spell up to level 8 one more time.

And an answer? Wall of iron, fabricate; now I have some money. Divination, gambling; now I have some more. Owl's Wisdom, permanency; now I won't waste that money like an idiot. What more may I want?

Lysander
2010-09-25, 06:44 PM
Not within the boundaries of 'wish', you get partial fulfillment. You can cast another spell up to level 8 one more time.

And an answer? Wall of iron, fabricate; now I have some money. Divination, gambling; now I have some more. Owl's Wisdom, permanency; now I won't waste that money like an idiot. What more may I want?

Owl's Wisdom doesn't work with permanency. However you could give yourself permanent Tongues which would be nice. Or set up a permanent teleportation circle and charge people for instantaneous one-way travel between say, New York and Hong Kong.

KillianHawkeye
2010-09-25, 07:25 PM
I'd probably spend a while using evocation and abjuration spells to fight crime. Or maybe I'd pretend to be the next Jesus.

Or I could go the opposite direction and hold the world hostage for 100 BILLION dollars! /dr. evil

Thrawn183
2010-09-25, 07:31 PM
Owl's Wisdom doesn't work with permanency. However you could give yourself permanent Tongues which would be nice. Or set up a permanent teleportation circle and charge people for instantaneous one-way travel between say, New York and Hong Kong.

People always think too small with teleportation circle. You need to put one in space.

KillianHawkeye
2010-09-25, 07:36 PM
People always think too small with teleportation circle. You need to put one in space.

Yeah, use it to throw crap into the sun. If it worked for Superman, it can work for us. :smallwink:

Lysander
2010-09-25, 08:00 PM
People always think too small with teleportation circle. You need to put one in space.

What would be very useful is a teleportation circle to the moon. You could easily transport supplies and build a lunar base. Because of the low gravity it would also be a great place to launch objects into earth orbit, or towards other planets in the solar system. One of the biggest costs in space travel right now is just getting things out of Earth's gravity and the circle would totally solve that problem. And the moon is close enough that you could have people return to Earth by shuttle after teleporting.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-25, 08:47 PM
Prismatic Sphere + Permanency.

You now have the ultimate safe haven and safe house. The worlds entire nuclear arsenal can be dropped on your head and it would do nothing. Incidentally, it is also the ultimate way to dispose of nuclear waste, garbage, sewage, and other such things.

Teleportation Circle + Permanency
Unlimited energy, it's a perpetual motion machine. Although I would probably use it for getting stuff into orbit. Wall of Fire + Permanency also works for this.

Oh, Polymorph+PAO. Into a 14 year old very young Gold Dragon. In 1 year I become Young, gaining a few HD and more importantly spell casting. Arguably, you also gain the various dragon abilities (a very young and young gold dragon being different creatures, means that you gain all of the abilities of a young gold dragon).

If that's not allowed, Polymorph+PAO into an Elan for immortality.

Use Limited Wish to emulate Psychic Reformation, and depending upon what happens alter my "skill points" and select a feat(s).

Shapechange get's used to get SU's to abuse for 10 minutes (have to find a creature with Shapechange as an SU).


Beyond that, I would just save most of the spells until I run into a situation where I need one.

Wishing up 500 pounds of gold is only about 10 million bucks. I would be better off wishing Bin Laden into a cage in front of me and turning him in for the $25 million bounty (if I can't convince the government to pay me more) after using Dominate Person to force him to write down all his bank account information so that I can rob him blind. But I still probably just save my wish.

Douglas
2010-09-25, 10:41 PM
Shapechange get's used to get SLA's to abuse for 10 minutes (have to find a creature with Shapechange as an SLA).

Shapechange doesn't grant SLAs.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-25, 10:41 PM
Shapechange doesn't grant SLAs.
Doh, I meant to put SU's.

sciencepanda
2010-09-25, 10:51 PM
Wait, wouldn't putting a teleportation circle in space suck out a decent portion of the earth's atmosphere or some such?

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-25, 10:55 PM
Wait, wouldn't putting a teleportation circle in space suck out a decent portion of the earth's atmosphere or some such?

You put one going from Earth to space. It's a one way portal (not two way). It's also a really cheap way to get stuff into orbit.

sciencepanda
2010-09-25, 10:58 PM
Yes, that's exactly it. The air would be sucked through the portal and into space. If it was a one-way portal from space to earth, but just by itself that doesn't have much of a practical purpose.

Myth
2010-09-25, 11:04 PM
Plane Shift to a DnD world (maybe Toril). 3.5 Faerun will be ideal. I have all these SLAs I'm bound to be of interest for the Chirch of Mystra. Start gaining levels as Wizard under the Chirches protection. With full spellcasting i can come back to Earth.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-25, 11:12 PM
Yes, that's exactly it. The air would be sucked through the portal and into space. If it was a one-way portal from space to earth, but just by itself that doesn't have much of a practical purpose.

It actually requires a creature to be on it for it to activate.

Tiki Snakes
2010-09-25, 11:18 PM
Then I would need to check into some therapy sessions as my fundamental understanding of the universe would just have been entirely turned over and undermined.

After that? Not at all sure. :smallsmile:

Dr.Epic
2010-09-25, 11:23 PM
I'd have a Clone as per the necromancy spell just sitting around in a public storage center in case I ever get in enormous debt or am wanted by the mob or government. Also, what level would I'd cast the spells because resurrection allows you to bring someone back who's been dead for no more than 10 years per level so I want to know what's the limit for the period I could bring someone back.

Coidzor
2010-09-25, 11:45 PM
Immortality as a gold dragon would be pretty nifty, what with the bonus to every stat from a normal human except for Dex which is still human average until one gets older. And you would gain alternate form into a human or animal form even as a wyrmling dragon. And you wouldn't have to turn into one of the big honking ones to get the alternate form thing, since it's part of the package from wyrmling.

So you could basically go back to living your life as before, just immortal, smarter, more charismatic, and wiser (though potentially weaker and clumsier than before in human form, depending) and able to become someone new.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-25, 11:56 PM
Immortality as a gold dragon would be pretty nifty, what with the bonus to every stat from a normal human except for Dex which is still human average until one gets older. And you would gain alternate form into a human or animal form even as a wyrmling dragon.

So you could basically go back to living your life as before, just immortal and able to become someone new.

Nope, Alt. Form is SU. PAO doesn't give it to you. An argument can be made for gaining their casting and other SU and SLA abilities based on aging (and getting them naturally), but you don't get the ones given as a wrymling.

Meaning that you should probably actually start as a 15 year old (very young) Bronze Dragon. They get alternate form at the Young age category.

Dr.Epic
2010-09-26, 12:04 AM
We'd also get permanency too meaning one spell that fits the requirements could become permanent.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-26, 12:26 AM
Potentially 3 with Wish and Limited Wish.
Or 4 with Miracle.

ShneekeyTheLost
2010-09-26, 12:27 AM
Remember, your effective caster level is 1. Other than PAO, most forms of Polycheese don't work, as you don't have the caster level for the HD cap.

As for Teleportation Circle...


The spell fails if you attempt to set the circle to teleport creatures into a solid object, to a place with which you are not familiar and have no clear description, or to another plane. Ever been to the moon? No? Well, you probably won't be able to set up a teleportation circle set to that destination.

I think the polymorph into Elan is pretty nfity... immortality on the cheap.

Coidzor
2010-09-26, 12:30 AM
We've... got some pretty good pictures of the moon, and some damn fine telescopes these days.

boomwolf
2010-09-26, 12:33 AM
Pretend to be the messenger of god and rule the world.

Nobody but you KNOWS your limits of "each of these, once" so if you let out a few spells (even weaker ones) that are quite flashy in public view, you can pull this off.

After all, you are ding the impossible, nobody would EVER doubt you once you ressurect a guy that died a few years ago in from of the camera.

Otodetu
2010-09-26, 02:10 AM
The media will make sure everyone remembers you as the great hoax, if you ever get any attentions at all.

Remember that there are people pulling the strings in the background.

Coidzor
2010-09-26, 02:15 AM
Well, no, nothing so ostentatious as all that.

One could, with the necessary persona, swing a lesser version of such a thing.

cdrcjsn
2010-09-26, 02:16 AM
Find some way to pull a Pun Pun (http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75882/19869366/The_most_powerful_character._EVER.). That normally requires the casting of several spells rather than one of each, but with the wide assortment available, something similar should be possible.

But honestly, I wouldn't know what to do with all that power. Being happy to me can be accomplished by satisfaction in the little things in life.

If I actually do pull a Pun Pun, I can only hope that I don't get grandiose plans for the future of humanity a la God Emperor of Dune.

cdrcjsn
2010-09-26, 02:17 AM
Ever been to the moon? No? Well, you probably won't be able to set up a teleportation circle set to that destination.

Won't some sort of divination take care of that?

Gnomish Lab
2010-09-26, 02:31 AM
Won't some sort of divination take care of that?

Or some hours with a very good telescope? Or perhaps using pictures taken from the moon landing?

HunterOfJello
2010-09-26, 02:43 AM
I would create a teleportation + permanency circle to Mars.



Also, Teleportation Circle says: "The spell fails if you attempt to set the circle to teleport creatures into a solid object, to a place with which you are not familiar and have no clear description, or to another plane."

Photographs of Mars from above and from the probes we sent there are more than enough to familiarize yourself with one spot on the place.

~
I'm interested in seeing the responses to this thread and the ideas for creating permanent abilities.



*edit*

Polymorph any Object to permanently change myself to a Planetar Angel sounds like one of the best uses. It would give the abilities of a 17th level cleric, many SLAs and Change Shape at-will so I could look human.

Lysander
2010-09-26, 03:25 AM
It's really too bad most DnD spells are only useful in combat. If I got most of them I wouldn't know what to use them for. Even if I sought out combat, most of them don't give me that much of an advantage over someone with a gun.

742
2010-09-26, 03:35 AM
Ever been to the moon? No? Well, you probably won't be able to set up a teleportation circle set to that destination.

because the mars rovers didnt give us any pictures or video.

i cant believe i just posted in one of these threads.

but no, i wouldnt do that. i would solve all our enviromental problems then maybe conquer earth.

Myth
2010-09-26, 11:33 AM
but no, i wouldnt do that. i would solve all our enviromental problems then maybe conquer earth. You will get your head blown off by a team of snipers the moment you start running low on spells.

Jack_Simth
2010-09-26, 12:10 PM
Yes, that's exactly it. The air would be sucked through the portal and into space. If it was a one-way portal from space to earth, but just by itself that doesn't have much of a practical purpose.

Teleportation Circle (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/teleportationCircle.htm) doesn't make a portal. It teleports Creatures. Someone has to carry the object through the Teleportation Circle for it to have an effect. I suggest sacrificial elephants, horses, and similar for the heavy lifting.

Polymorphing yourself, unfortunately, isn't such a grand idea, due to the caster level and hit die limitations: "The assumed form can’t have more Hit Dice than your caster level (or the subject’s HD, whichever is lower)". Good luck finding a good 1 HD dragon to turn into.

Won't some sort of divination take care of that?
Or a really good telescope. Or pictures from one of the more recent mars rovers that did send us some really, really high-quality photos.

You can actually get as many as four Permanent spells if you push it - one from Permanency, one from Limited Wish (Permanency), one from Wish (Permanency), and one from Miracle (Permanency), but that'd likely be a waste of a Wish. Plus, of course, any spells that are, of themselves, Permanent (or Instant with a lasting effect). Edit: Strike that, you can't make use of Permanency on ANY spell. Permanency when applied to other spells has a minimum caster level requirement, which starts at 9 for cantrips and 1st level spells. This particular setup defines your caster level as 0.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-26, 05:16 PM
You use tricks to push your caster level up to 3-4, then turn into a dragon.

And I've been mostly ignoring that bit about caster level (because it makes a good chunk of the stuff utterly worthless).

Flickerdart
2010-09-26, 05:24 PM
Re: Teleportation Circle and creatures.

Constructs are creatures. Robots are constructs.

The Rabbler
2010-09-26, 05:30 PM
You will get your head blown off by a team of snipers the moment you start running low on spells.

wind wall is your friend.

Lysander
2010-09-26, 05:43 PM
wind wall is your friend.

For six seconds.

The Rabbler
2010-09-26, 08:47 PM
For six seconds.

that's long enough to stop a bullet.

KillianHawkeye
2010-09-26, 08:56 PM
that's long enough to stop a bullet.

Only if you know it's coming.

awa
2010-09-26, 09:04 PM
and you can only do it once not to mention bullets might ignore a wind wall

awa
2010-09-26, 09:07 PM
id use my wish for a good magic item perhaps a stat boosting one like a head band int so i can then think up some really good ideas (and i still have my mirical left over) i think polymorph any object would be bad choice because if it was permanent your mind would be gone replaced by whatever you turned into.

Tiki Snakes
2010-09-26, 09:10 PM
id use my wish for a good magic item perhaps a stat boosting one like a head band int so i can then think up some really good ideas (and i still have my mirical left over) i think polymorph any object would be bad choice because if it was permanent your mind would be gone replaced by whatever you turned into.

Plus don't you have to cast it twice for it to stick permenantly?

jywu98
2010-09-26, 09:16 PM
would shapechange into an efreeti to gain wish as a supernatural ability

Lysander
2010-09-26, 09:23 PM
would shapechange into an efreeti to gain wish as a supernatural ability

Unfortunately wish is a spell-like ability, not a supernatural ability, so you wouldn't get it.

Emperor Tippy
2010-09-26, 09:33 PM
Unfortunately wish is a spell-like ability, not a supernatural ability, so you wouldn't get it.

That's what Zodar's are for.


Plus don't you have to cast it twice for it to stick permenantly?

Polymorph first, follow it up with PAO (which is now permanent).

Aran Banks
2010-09-26, 11:26 PM
Plane shift and greater plane shift to see whether or not heaven/hell is real.

That would solve a few religious feuds...

VirOath
2010-09-26, 11:32 PM
Permanent Prestidigitation. /End Thread

Melayl
2010-09-27, 12:14 AM
Use Wish to create a magic item that allows me to use several useful spells (prestidigitation, cure minor wounds, regeneration, cure disease, heal, etc etc etc) at will and always return to me as willed (in case it gets stolen/lost). Reinforce with Limited Wish and Miracle as needed to improve power level (although, as written, this is within the ability of the Wish spell).

Use cloudkill to kill off the vermin in my yard (I have ants that just won't stay dead).

Soranar
2010-09-27, 12:18 AM
couldn't you just wish to become a gold dragon? (thus eventually becoming a caster with level 9 spell access which would in turn give you unlimited wishes and spells?)

Another_Poet
2010-09-27, 12:41 AM
Nova. I'd nova and blow it all in one blaze of glory.

Don't get me wrong, I'd take a few months to plan it out first. There are a lot of corporations, governments and political groups I'd feel the need to affect in one way or another with my Great Moment. I'd want to plan the very best strategy to get the most impact from my spells; as well as the wisest use of a few things like Permanency, Raise Dead and True Resurrection. I'd also want to secure a lasting reputation through my actions, as the man who changed history.

I'd probably use my Wish toward the end of the nova as a means of blocking revenge/backlash from those who Disapprove.

The only spells I would save would be the Cure X Wounds line and similar, since it'd be nice to have those for later accidents or emergencies.

ap

edit:



Plane shift and greater plane shift to see whether or not heaven/hell is real.

That would solve a few religious feuds...

Nobody would believe you :smalltongue: (Especially since you can't repeat it)

Lysander
2010-09-27, 12:48 AM
Nobody would believe you :smalltongue: (Especially since you can't repeat it)

That's why you Greater Planar Ally an angel to come and explain what it knows about the universe on television.

Elemental_Elf
2010-09-27, 12:56 AM
I'd use wish to make me the Captain of the Enterprise! :smallbiggrin:

*Wakes up in a dinghy named Enterprise*

"KKKKKHHHHAAAAAAAANNN!!!!!!!" :smallfurious:


What a glorious day that would be! :smallbiggrin:

Veros
2010-09-27, 01:13 AM
Plus don't you have to cast it twice for it to stick permenantly?

Miracle (Polymorph any Object) or Wish (Polymorph any Object).

But if it is close enough to a normal human... Same size, both animals... Plus either same intelligence or related (Mindflayer. Look it up... They require a human host. So I'd say related.) Same class... (Mammal).

So we need a Medium Sized Mammal, a Medium Sized living creature with Human like intelligence, a mammal of any size (Titan anyone?), or a Mindflayer for one casting to be permanent.

I'm thinking Titan or Mindflayer if you want to be flashy...

Or Limited Wish (Psychic Reformation) or what ever to get that lovely Assume Supernatural Ability and Polymorph any Object into a Sarrukh. Then Gate in a Kobold or something. Tell it you will grant it a power beyond power if it follow one simple command. Use Manipulate Form to grant it a modified Manipulate Form that grants the power to control the forms of every living creature. Have him do the same to you.

Send him home with the power to become a god. And find your favorite lover/buddy/"friend" and go to town with Pun-Pun chain. ^^; You and your "Buddy" are now Pun-Pun. Make sure to grant Time Stop at Will. Immunity to Bullets, Immunity to Fire, Immunity to Acid, Immunity to Electricity, Immunity to Diseases, Immunity to Bludgeoning, Immunity to Piercing, Immunity to Stunning, Immunity to Overdoses, Immunity to Poison, Immunity to Sleep, Immunity to Slashing, Immunity to Crushing, Immunity to Anti-Magic Field, Freedom of Movement, Greater Teleport, and Steal Immortality (and thus Sneak Attack) from Thief of Life first.

I'd toss in Immunity to Insanity, Immunity to Cancer, Immunity to Heart Disease, Immunity to Indegestion, Immunity to Starvation, Immunity to Sexually Transmitted Diseases (If not covered by immunity to diseases), and Tongues pretty quickly too.

Edit: Forgot a will in one of the sentences.

sambo.
2010-09-27, 01:17 AM
throw a couple of big-arse, AoE damage spells at a "hostile" nation (if they weren't hostil, they will be now).

use the evidence of that damage to instill fear in teh global population.

demand tribute and payment in return for not doing it again.

profit?

AugustNights
2010-09-27, 01:35 AM
Permanency. That is all.

Aharon
2010-09-27, 06:33 AM
What Tippy said, plus Astral Projection & Clone & Genesis.
If they consent, I would use different kinds of quasi-immortality on friends and family, and only one on myself.

Let's see how many people we can make immortal given the available spells - Assuming of course there won't anybody to dispell them:
1) Astral Projection.
2) Polymorph + PoA
3) Alter Self + Miracle (PoA)
4) Limited Wish (Polymorph) + Wish (PoA)
5) Gate + Magic Jar + Mage's Lucubration (Magic Jar) (assuming here that the spell is altered so it works on my SLAs, otherwise it would be pretty useless to have).

Hm, I can already save 5 people. Anybody got additional ideas? I have a large familiy...

Also, Awaken on my dog.

DruchiiConversion
2010-09-27, 06:35 AM
Actually, given my relative lack of mastery of the rules, I'd probably log into a forum such as this one and post a new thread titled "If you could cast each spell ONCE in real life...".

Something you're not telling us, OP? :smallconfused:

Eldan
2010-09-27, 07:06 AM
Well, I only need three spells. Everything else is precaution and icing.

Double Polymorph into an Elan or other immortal creature. Planeshift to Arborea. Party.

Roc Ness
2010-09-27, 07:22 AM
Personally, I'd probably just create a permanent unseen servant, and then decide to save the rest of my spells, and then forget I had them in the first place...

Lhurgyof
2010-09-27, 07:45 AM
Charm Person and dominate.... hehehe. :smallwink:

Tharck
2010-09-27, 08:56 AM
Then i'd have WoTC print more spells.

Kish
2010-09-27, 12:28 PM
Nova. I'd nova and blow it all in one blaze of glory.
[...]
This sounds like the best idea in the thread to me.

Another_Poet
2010-09-27, 01:06 PM
This sounds like the best idea in the thread to me.

Yay! I is special :)

Beorn080
2010-09-27, 01:20 PM
Honestly?

I'd spend the wishes on practical things. Wishing for eternal wands strikes me as a good use, command word activated. Something like polymorph, or minor creation. Phantasmal killer or similar might also be good. Honestly, if it was just one wand, and I know miracle can make magic items, but is really up to whatever god you request it from, I'd go with Minor Creation over polymorph. Too many things you can do with plant products, and polymorph has a great deal of limitations.

After I got the wand, well, hmmm. Turning into a dragon sounds like a decent idea. Aging as one and getting spellcasting would be helpful. Plus, there are a few people whom I know of that need to be eaten. Other then that, I'd try to save as many of the spells as possible. Some form of permanent magic jar would be fun, hiring people who agree to be used as a host for paying patrons who want to try something different.

Oh, and I'd make a continual flame on a super bouncy ball. Great balls of fire joke plus fun at parties throwing and bouncing a safe flaming sphere. Hmm, maybe an eternal wand of continual flame. Could make some real money off that. Wonder how many carbon credits replacing all lightbulbs in the world would be worth?

Roderick_BR
2010-09-27, 07:56 PM
Wait, wouldn't putting a teleportation circle in space suck out a decent portion of the earth's atmosphere or some such?
Well, if you want to be technical, you also will need to teleport with special suits, or you'll suffocate/freeze/explode. Ideally, you'd want to put it inside a lunar base with all the proper logistic.

Lord Vampyre
2010-09-27, 08:11 PM
You know with the Spell Compendium, and various other sources of spells, the list of spells would last quite sometime.

And it would really depend on whether or not anyone else had the same opportunity to cast each spell once. I would probably see them as competition and find a way to convince them to waste most of their spells, while trying to never cast a single spell. Conserving my power until I actually needed it.

If no one else had the opportunity, I would probably live out most of my days with never casting a single spell unless it was an emergency. I tend to conserve my resources unless I can see no other way to gain an outcome I consider desirable.