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stabbitty death
2010-11-16, 05:36 PM
Hello playground, this is my first attempt at homebrew, so here it is
Dawnstealer
medium undead
6hp
attacks: 2 claws 1d2+1
ac 18 flat footed 14 touch 14
sq aura of dawn stealing 30 ft radius all living creatures in the aura must make a dc 8 fortitude save or take 1 point of strength damage as a little bit of their life energy is absorbed by the dawnstealer, the dawnstealer regains 1 hit point, with excess bieng gained as temp hp, for every five points of strength damage dealt, both the amount of strength damage dealt and the save dc increase by one.
So, what do you think?

Mulletmanalive
2010-11-16, 05:49 PM
I think you're not doing it justice...which is a shame.

I've posted in Vorpal Tribble's monster formatting thingy here: just copy the stuff in the ''no parse" section and fill in your monster. Like in math classes, we like to see your full working. Then we'll check the numbers and help you pollish that nasty little aura ability to a mirror shine!

No Parsed Stat Block Code
Name

<Size> <Type>
Hit Dice:
Initiative:
Speed: (# squares)
Armor Class: (), touch, flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple:
Attack:
Full Attack:
Space/Reach:
Special Attacks:
Special Qualities:
Saves: Fort +, Ref +, Will +
Abilities Str , Dex , Con , Int , Wis , Cha
Skills:
Feats:
Environment:
Organization:
Challenge Rating:
Treasure:
Alignment:
Advancement:
Level Adjustment:

Description/background/characteristics

Combat

Ability descriptions

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

- Optional -

Lore

Plot Hook/Story if any

Name

<Size> <Type>
Hit Dice:
Initiative:
Speed: (# squares)
Armor Class: (), touch, flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple:
Attack:
Full Attack:
Space/Reach:
Special Attacks:
Special Qualities:
Saves: Fort +, Ref +, Will +
Abilities Str , Dex , Con , Int , Wis , Cha
Skills:
Feats:
Environment:
Organization:
Challenge Rating:
Treasure:
Alignment:
Advancement:
Level Adjustment:

Description/background/characteristics

Combat

Ability descriptions

-=-=-=-=-=-=-

- Optional -

Lore

Plot Hook/Story if any

stabbitty death
2010-11-16, 06:02 PM
Thanks Mulletman

BelGareth
2010-11-17, 12:34 PM
Agree with mullet man, it will make it easier on us and also make you come up with everything making sure you don't miss anything crucial.

What's the CR of this creature?
Looks to be around 1/4-3

Hp seem a little low, you need to say how many HD take the average of the HD and then add any Con mods and/or feats.

Is this for Pathfinder or 3.5 or both?
I found the Pathfinder Bestiary very easy to level/custom create monsters, you should read it. And stick to the basics outlined there, I.e hp,HD...etc

AC is a little high for what I'm imagining, (cr 2) and once again you need to break it down, looks like +4 dex and +4 nat? That's a little to high dex mod for an undead to have.
undead typically don't have high Dex and are easy to hit, and AC of 18 is actually high at lower levels and will result in frustrated players. Try something like 15, +4 nat +1 dodge.

DC 8?
As a rule all DC's start at base 10, then you add the level of the ability (1 or 2?) and then an ability modifier. In this case sounds like CHA? Something like this maybe?
10+2+1= 13
this gives you what your looking for, it's a low DC but at first through 3rd still something to worry about.

The increase in DC and str damage is a little off, I've only seen anything like it on a demon, I would leave it as a static affect, str damage at low levels is crippling, you don't want it to make it worse.

You could make an advanced template to enhance all these abilities for higher CR's.
Make the 1 str damage upgrade to 1d4.
Increase DC of aura
increase area of aura

It's a good idea just needs some refinement, and some fluff would be nice too!
Hope this helps.