View Full Version : Beholder's Pub, now rebuilt

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2006-08-02, 02:53 PM
As you enter the bar, the first thing you will notice is the faint tingling feeling as you cross it's threshold after you pass through the threshold, there is a coatroom, with a sleeping kobold behind the counter. Entering the bar through the other door, the first thing you will see is the bar itself, with the huge leathery orange sphere of the beholder floating behind it. Behind the bar, the shelves are stacked with exotic and familiar looking drinks, and taking up a whole shelf, a white dragon dozes inside a glass box, it's cool side lined with bottles of beer and koboldi breezers. The rest of the room is strewn with a scattering of tables, or corner seats with comfortable benches. To your left is a raised stage, with a light shining down on it, and a stool in the middle. Empty beer bottles are scattered across the stage. To the right is a roaring fire, with about two dozen armchairs. Inhabiting the armchair closest to the fire is an elderly ogre, in a suit, sleeping, or smoking a cigar with a glass of brandy. Above the fireplace’s mantel is a brass plate, which has an inscription of another ogre, female, with the words: Petal, lifelong friend
Beneath it. In the corner by one of the windows is a large web, even though the rest of the pub is nearly spotless. There is a large dart board to the side of the bar. On the walls of the bar are the following posters:

Monsters unite! You have nothing to lose but you're vulnerability to paladin's smite ability!



And a fragment of beholder's famous speech (well famous in his homeland)
I Have a dream.....I have a dream that all the little monster boys, and all the little human girls will be able to play together some day. I have a dream that the goblins will be able to go to school with halflings, that giants can work with elves, and that beholder's can float the streets without fear of bloodthirsty adventurers
I have a dream....

Non-humanoid? Yes! Non-person? No!

If you prick us with an admantine needle which manages to get through our DR do we not bleed?

The menus rest atop the bar, and read


beers and ciders
Slaadweiser: a refreshing rotted wheat drink, manufactured and bottled in the ever-changing chaos of Limbo. 1CP

Diemonkein: The popular turnip beer, brewed by gnolls, under the supervision of the demon: MAEGALORTH THE TORTURE OF SOULS.refreshing,zingy taste. 3 CP

Djinnuiss: a dark stout, brewed by the genies of the northern isle. 4 CP

Spitfire: tasty apple cider.brewed by A Red Dragon


Champagne: that's right, just ordinary champagne.
30 GP

Morghlot: a dark, red wine for the undead 3 SP

bottles cost triple.


ghosts with diet coke 5 Gp

spectres with a 666up-2 GP

willow wisps and soda- 1 GP

BARBAROTHS ANGEL BLOOD AND WIDOW TEARS SOUL DESTROYING VODKA a suprisingly mild brandy.brewed by Mr.Paul whitferd, a cobbler with too much time on his hands

Athach Daniels Can-hardlysee no.47 whisky: Served in many fine establishments.and questionable joints everywhere. 15 Cp

No rum: but why is the rum gone?

Threebarrels brandy: brandy brewed in three different dimesions. tatses pretty normal 2 GP
(more to come)

Non alcoholic drinks or alcoholic drinks for light weights

koboldi breezer: a nice mixture of Kriss and fruit juices,bloods,or urine.can hardly taste the alcohol
horse piss
rat piss

Tea- 2 Gp
mocha cappucino-3 gp

Food and other things
gecko curry
skink chowmein with fries
Chameleon Korma
Komodo suprise
Tarrasque sized portions xtra cheap curry
our world famous Iguana curry,
and for vegeterians
lamb curry


Dimentional Pie- The original pie! you can go anywhere after eating a slice of this! 15 gp

Glitterdust Pie- A fanastic fireworks show with every bite! Diminished for your viewing pleasure. 10 gp

Knowledge Bars- One of these will let you know anything! 30 gp

Cigars-fungus,tobacco or steel. 5gp,15gp and 150 gp accordingly

stay in our rooms?
sleeping on the floor-1 gp
shared room- 5Gp
private room-15gp
big spender's suite-150 gp.

((for a room just make a post saying which room your in, with 50 rooms, room no. 50 being the big spender's suite. to get to them you have to go up the stairs, but i wont start a whole new post for upstairs unless you request it))

((this whole bar is a genesis dimension. evreything is fireproof, and everything in the bar and all bar employees have DR 100/The barman's club.and everyone has fast healing))

Abd al-Azrad
2006-08-02, 04:00 PM
A small man bursts into the pub, spins on a heel, and slams the door shut behind him. He then attempts to magically lock the door.

2006-08-02, 04:07 PM
greeetings small humanoid...may i interest you in a refreshing beverage or foodstuff?
(he seems not to notice the man's worried demeanour)

Abd al-Azrad
2006-08-02, 04:11 PM
The man spins around, shrieks at the sight of a beholder, then catches himself. He speaks a strange language, but the words are perfectly understandable.

You speak?

2006-08-02, 04:15 PM
No,no small creature, my name is bookoo deyoo, but you may call me beholder. now what would you like? our iguana curry is world renowned, and we have several selections of rotted wheat beverages with malt...i mean, beer. also try our cocktails!

Abd al-Azrad
2006-08-02, 04:17 PM
The man looks at beholder warily.

Why do you hesitate to attack me? ...And why are you offering me food?

2006-08-02, 04:23 PM
The large, orange monstrosity looks hurt for a second...
Ahh..I see.. we have a prejudiced person. well please good sir, i only wish to live peacefully in this town with my family and friends.not all beholders are evil,a and not all evil creatures are harmful.i hoep one day to start an equal rights campaign with the money from this bar...but, i digress, look again at this building, COWERING MORTAL...sorry, sorry force of habit
he gestures with an eyestalk, at the small mans surroundings. the walls are covered with cheap posters exclaming things such as Non-humanoid? yes! non-person? no!
If you prick us with an admantine needle which manages to get through our DR do we not bleed?
the other distinguishing features are a large dartboard, comfortable chairs, a roaring fire, and two elderly ogres asleep in armchairs facing the fire.
Now..what would you like?

Abd al-Azrad
2006-08-02, 04:29 PM
((wow. Those posters are hilarious. Awesome.))

The man looks confused, but seems to relax slightly.

I did not mean... What a strange place. I am not from around here... to be honest, I do not know what a beholder is. I was just running from the things in the street, you see... the procession of instrumentalists. Um... where am I?

2006-08-02, 04:39 PM
You my good small PUNY INSIGNIFCANT CREATURE...i'm so sorry, i have had postitive therapy for this, i am in control.i am in controlll.anyway, you my f-f-friend, are in beholder's allnite bar and allnite-reptillian curry house.we also do a good pizza, authentic from the creatures that created pizza, thats right, Lamia! my close personal friend, Fergy, runs the pizzeria, whereas i run the bar, and forgath the destroyer and crusher of eternity does the best reptillian curry in The Town! and since you are our first customer, you receive one complimentary beverage and pizza!
you get a green goblin toe slammer, a most potent drink, made of fermented rat,green fern seeds, and lots of treacle!, also, Fergy's first pizza ever..for a customer of course!...extra cheese with batter fired pixies! you will also receive this complimentary mug, being our first customer,and if you give us your name {and describe the man to me}we will carve a plaque for our first customer!

EDIT: {sorry i g2g}
Well, i'm closing up for the night, but feel free to stay here,anyone else can too, just dont start any fights, and make your own pizza's.fergy's wathcing you, so he'll know how much to charge
GOOD NIGHT SMALL WORTHLESS SLUG!! damnit damnit.sorry, must keep that under control
the beholder floats out back, making deep breathing sounds

Abd al-Azrad
2006-08-02, 05:11 PM
The man looks a bit stunned for a moment, then brightens.

Well, so long as I'm here, I might as well eat. Or sleep. Hmm... what kind of 'charge' are you looking for, Fergy? Is this one of those worlds where coloured metals are valuable?

The man produces a piece of silver the size of a fist, and spends a little while attempting to grasp the concept of pizza.

2006-08-03, 02:57 PM
The beholder floats back into the bar area:
Well hello my small friend. any currency is good here, except for druidic wooden dollars.I'm not falling for that one twice, oh no! anyway, pizza is a large flat piece of bread with crushed tomatoe,cheese, and in this case, battered pixies, however, we have nearly any topping you would like!
also, our complimentary goblin toe-slammer is sitting on the bar for you, be careful, it may have strange side effects. When our lazy-troglodyte smith wakes up, (my adobe illustrator crashed)We'll get you that mug, and we need your name, good sir, for a plaque.Since you're our first customer, all this is on the house! but feel free to buy yourself another, drink or why not try a potato cigar? or purchase an educational poster??

2006-08-04, 02:31 PM
Welll i guesss i expected this. after all, any humanoid town is bound to be prejudiced.
lets try this

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-04, 03:46 PM
*a llama wearing a black mask and a nice black collar with blue sapphires pushes open the door with a hoof and looks around, licking his lps.*

2006-08-04, 03:51 PM
hello my good err..err..halfing? never mind, whatever you are, one free drink for you
our special tonight is fairy wallbanger.
The beholder levitates a bottle.inside, a pickled pixie floats.
Pickled in vodka and Kriss, thats rat-alcohol. would you like a reptillian curry? or perhaps a delicious pizza?

2006-08-04, 03:57 PM

The door to the pub open hesitantly, timidly. a smallish reptillian head peeks in followed by the rest of the kobold. tentatively he enters and starts looking for appropriate seating.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-04, 03:57 PM
*llama looks a little disturbed by the pixie in a bottle, but tries not to show it.* "ummm....Curry sounds good? I think? And I'm a llama. Atreyu the llama to be exact." *he pauses when he says that, confusion glinting in his eyes for a split second, then he shakes his head* "umm....yeah...curry is good."

(gotta run soon, maybe time for one more post.)

2006-08-04, 04:02 PM
The beholder looks from the llama to the bottle then back to the llama then back to the bottle. he sighs

well sir we have:
gecko curry
skink chowmein with fries
Komodo suprise
Tarrasque sized portions xtra cheap curry
our world famous Iguana curry,
and for vegeterians
lamb curry
And thank you for not being prejudiced mr atreyu. you're always welcome at beholder's.here, have a potato cigar, on the house!

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-04, 04:09 PM
"Lamb curry sounds good." *he perks up at the sound of it.* "I am a plant eater after all."
(okay, gotta run. Sorry Beholder.)

2006-08-04, 04:17 PM
But of course sir!
potato cigar?
It is soggy, and vaguely cigar shaped.the creature holds up a small lighter, with a tiny fire elemental imprisoned inside.
Is there anything else sir needs? would he like to sign up for dart competition? or spot the pixie? or maybe sir would like to purchase a poster?
EDIT: (sorry i missed that)
Come again soon!

2006-08-04, 04:54 PM

the little kobold finaly finds a seat he can sit in and begins to relax.

2006-08-04, 05:02 PM
What takes sir's pleasure?
beer,ale,mead,vodka,kriss,goblin-toeslammers,pixie wallbangers, ogre martini?
a pizza perhaps?
or would you like to sign up for a contest?

2006-08-04, 05:09 PM

" mmmmm curry...and whats a pixie wallbanger? And just where am I? Last thing i remember was setting that teleport trap in Thay."

2006-08-04, 05:14 PM
This my good monster, is beholder's allnite bar and curryhouse, and you are our 3rd customer.business is a little slow on account of me being a giant floating disembodied head with more eyes than 4 spiders.a pixie wallbanger is vodka,kriss, and a pixie in a champagne glass.and oddly enough, noon has spotted the pixie yet to get our signature drink.our curry menu is already here, and you can order ANY topping for the pizza

2006-08-04, 05:21 PM

" alrighty lets see how much for a pixie wallbanger and a dish of iguana curry? Is there a special pixie to be spotted or something cuz i think a pixie in a bottle would be easy to spot like that?"

2006-08-04, 05:25 PM
Well..umm, any currency is good, just pay what you want. as for spotting the pixie...hehehe.umm. you let me know if you spot it

2006-08-04, 11:47 PM

The curried iguana and pixie wallbanger were good. better fare than he was used to. most taverns meals like this were worth 5 silver each. Yaltrik left a full gold peice. He left the pub to explore more of this strange place. (moved to allara's gems)

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-04, 11:48 PM
(for the sake of the story, and I'll be back later.)*llama munches on the curry, pays and heads out. He compliments the Beholder on the posters as he leaves.*
(those are nice.)

2006-08-05, 02:58 PM
To yaltrik: Thank you sir, please come again!
to atreyu: thank you sir, keep fighting the good fight! just because we dont have thumbs doesn't mean we aren't people!
The beholder than sticks a large menu, and several more posters, above the bar:



Slaadweiser: a refreshing rotted wheat drink, sometimes called beer by humans: manufactured and bottled in the ever-changing chaos of Limbo.

Diemonkein: The popular turnip beer, brewed by gnolls, under the supervision of the demon: MAEGALORTH THE DESTROYER OF WORLDS.refreshing,zingy taste.

Spitfire: tasty apple cider.brewed by A Red Dragon

koboldi breezer: a nice mixture of Kriss and fruit juices,bloods,or urine.can hardly taste the alcohol
horse piss
rat piss

Athach Daniels a fine whisky.

BARBAROTHS ANGEL BLOOD AND WIDOW TEARS SOUL DESTROYING VODKA a suprisingly mild brandy.brewed by Mr.Paul whitferd, a cobbler with too much time on his hands

Assorted cocktails

gecko curry
skink chowmein with fries
Komodo suprise
Tarrasque sized portions xtra cheap curry
our world famous Iguana curry,
and for vegeterians
lamb curry

The posters:

Monsters unite! you have nothing to lose but you're vulnerability to paladin's smite ability!



and a fragment of beholder's famous speech(well famous in his homeland)
I Have a dream.....I have a dream that all the little monster boys, and all the little human girls will be able to play together some day.I have a dream that the goblins will be able to go to school with halflings, that giants can work with elves, and that beholder's can float the streets without fear of bloodthirsty adventurers
I have a dream....

And finally:
Non-humanoid? yes! non-person? no!

If you prick us with an admantine needle which manages to get through our DR do we not bleed?

2006-08-05, 03:45 PM
Several goblins enter the pub.

2006-08-05, 03:51 PM
Welllcome kind sirs, what can i do you for? i am most pleased to see some monsters walking the streets unharmed? how many are there of your party exactly
the baby beholder floats into the back room, leaving it's doll behind

2006-08-05, 04:56 PM
unharmed? Maglubiet's fist! After the rebellion, most of us goblins have left as it is. The humans are so angry at us, we can hardly go outside our door without being skinned alive!

2006-08-06, 03:19 PM
A sad tale my friend. mys elf and my family fled from a distant land, where a paladin was slaughtering harmless monster's left right and centre. drinks on me, and if you need to hide, theres a backroom. ask the trolls and they'll show you

2006-08-06, 04:29 PM
Oh, thankee, sir. Not often we meet a goblin-friendly buisiness. Between yours, the docks, a few ships, and the Den, there aren't really any in town. We've been thinking of unionizing down atthe docks.

2006-08-07, 03:45 PM
well sir, we have to stick together,beholder's are just a incriminated as goblins, and i personally am tired being labelled "monster, and "abberation". you stay here as long as you like, and let me know if you start a union. is this goblin's only? or all the prejudiced races? i have some good slogans( motions to the posters)
If no that's ok, i have a few buddies out back, goblins, a hob, and a coupla bugbears, who'd be interested. also, we're hiring, and if you guys can't find jobs anywhere else, i'll happily pay you. the pay it half of what they pay you, ok?, and all the booze you want. i might even do an employee of the month... he floats off, muttering to himself. the baby beholder reappears.
You're not halfin' baddies, you gobbos, my friend's are goblins. you're ok, whats you''re names?

2006-08-07, 05:31 PM
Well, I'm Grashnag, this here's my brother Galfank, this's our friend Braklag, his brother Grashmuk, and our cousin Mashlunk. We might start a union real soon, but I'm not sure if the guys'll go for lettin' beholders in. Most of them know chaps that've been eaten by beholders. Still, maybe we could convince 'em.

Mashlunk speaks up, having finished reading the goblin paper, the Word-Page.

Sez 'ere tha' some gang o' 'umans attacked a goblin vessel in da harbor. Sez dey 'ad 'elp from da police. Sad times.

2006-08-09, 04:23 PM
Beholder floats out, with a tray, with four plates, and five bottles from the dragon-box,Terrible what they do these days.... one day, if i get enough funding from this pub, i'll start a political party...meanwhile, i just do my best from here....anyway, this is my son, called puffball for now... and your drinks gents, 5 slaadweiser's, and 4 pizza's with lean ground beef liver, cheese,and tomatoe-mushrooms. thats how our goblins like it, let me know if you want anything else lads, any of you want a job? waitering? bartending?

2006-08-09, 05:40 PM
((puffball. That got a chuckle out of me.))

The goblins thank the beholder.

Jobs? Aye, we'd like jobs. I'd be right proper gent if'n I had a job.

I've been lookin' in the job offers, but most of 'em say "no goblins". Sad times.

Which ones don't?

The one for mercenaries for a suicide mission.

What's it pay? pipes up Braklag, his face stuffed with pizza.

The other goblins stare at him incredulously.

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-09, 09:35 PM

A four-armed teifling rides into the pub, looking around. He is followed by a large, crystaline orge. he looks at the beholder and begins to speak:

Greetings, I am Fualkner Asiniti. I heard you are looking for some workers. I would love to be your chef. I specialize in dimentional pie. do you have any rules against employees entering your dart contest? Anyway, do you have a place I can let Cruthamire stay?

He puts a spider on a table and says:

this spider is trained to return to me when you give it a note. I'm sorry, but I must leave for now.

He mounts his spider and leaves the pub.

2006-08-10, 02:01 PM
to the goblins:
well we need waiter's, and chef's,barmen, etc.see, i'm nocturnal, and most of the time i'm not awake when paying customers are here((aka different time zone))
the pay's half of what they give you, i'm not too hot on human currency, so if they give you, four halfling's heads, or whatever the human equivalent is, you keept two, and put two in the kitty.just yell to me how much more goes in the kitty, and i'll keep track. you're welcome to take tips too obviously. the employee of the week ( most income) gets a bonus of 5% of the kitty.jest let me know whate you'd like to do, and i'm sure i can accomadate you. we need diurnal creatures.

(looks at the spider with some confusion)

((is this a Pm?))
he then writes
Dear Mr.Fualkner Asiniti, i would like to welcome you as a cook.the same offer applies to you as does to the goblins, and your friend can join the troll bouncers or go into the back room with the other refugees of the paladin massacre.looking forward to you're pie, and since noone has signed up for this contest, if you join you'll probably win!

puffball floats up to braklag
Are you stupid mista? goblins shouldn't help suicides, whatever they are....probably some sort o' halflin'

2006-08-10, 05:26 PM
But it means.... umm.... you know what? Never mind. We'll take your job offer.

We will?

Sure we will. Bonuses, friendly employer, a very low chance of being attacked by bloodthirsty adventurers... what more could a goblin ask for?

Good point. we'll join up!

2006-08-10, 05:29 PM
But it means.... umm.... you know what? Never mind. We'll take your job offer.

We will?

Sure we will. Bonuses, friendly employer, a very low chance of being attacked by bloodthirsty adventurers... what more could a goblin ask for?

Good point. we'll join up!

((A group of bloodthirsy adventures come in..."look! Goblins! ATTACK!" They flee.))

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-10, 08:45 PM
Fualkner starts cooking up some dementional pie to celebrate his new job.

2006-08-10, 09:12 PM
ZombieRockStar enters the bar. His current clothing includes an army combat jacket and a pair of round glasses. ((Currently channeling John Lennon, for those of you who can't guess))

He looks around. A monster-friendly pub! My kind of place, a place where I can make a stand on monster rights.

To the beholder behind the bar (in a Liverpudlian accent): Hey man, do you need a bard to play? I got a few songs you might like.

2006-08-11, 11:47 PM
to zombierockstar:
of course i'd love a bard! do you know we all live in a yellow dungeon cave?
i'll give you a cut if the kitty, but you'll have to rely on tips mostly. i need all this extra staff, as i haven't broken the nocturnal streak yet.

adventurers: turns, disintergrate, hold person, disintergrate. a kobold rushes out and sweeps up the dust.beholder smiles

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-12, 12:14 AM
"Hey, zombierockstar!" yells Fualkner from the kitchen. "I'm a big fan. Here, have some dementional pie!"

Fualkner walks out of the kitchen, holding a pie pan in one hand, a slice of pie in another, and a second slice in his third. his fourth carries two forks.

2006-08-12, 03:27 AM
A tuxedoed lich walks into the tavern. He look sat the beholder.

Hey. I saw the "help wanted sign", and since you already have a cook and waht appear to be other waitstaff, I would like to apply for the job of barman, just while I'm getting started in this town.

2006-08-12, 08:25 AM
Alright. Pie! Thanks, man, but I think I should play a song first, just to get going.

*Takes out an acoustic guitar and begins playing quietly in A Minor*

As soon as you're dead
They make you feel small
By giving you no brains
Instead of them all.
And you have no life
So you feel nothing at all.
A working-class zombie is something to be.
A working-class zombie is something to be.

They hurt you at church:
The necromancy school.
You have no brains to be clever
So you act the fool.
You're a f***ing zombie,
So follow the rules.
A working-class zombie is something to be.
A working-class zombie is something to be.

You're soul is being tortured
For many a long year.
You're forced to eat brains
As a career.
Fortunately, you're a zombie
And immune to fear.
A working-class zombie is something to be.
A working-class zombie is something to be.

If you want to be a zombie, then just follow me.
If you want to be a zombie, then just follow me.

Thank you. I'm also playing at the Waterfront Music Festival. Come out and see me and sometimes a back-up band.

He places his guitar back in the case and sits down to eat some dimensional pie with Fualkner.

2006-08-12, 04:03 PM
((Should you decide to hire the goblins, I am handing over control of them to you (they are, after all, NPCs.)))

Well, I'm Grashnag, this here's my brother Galfank, this's our friend Braklag, his brother Grashmuk, and our cousin Mashlunk. We might start a union real soon, but I'm not sure if the guys'll go for lettin' beholders in. Most of them know chaps that've been eaten by beholders. Still, maybe we could convince 'em

Grashnag-Galfank's brother and Mashlunk's Cousin. A rather quaint fellow, with a variety of views on everything. Talks a lot.((Talks in Orange))

Galfank-Grashnag's brother and Mashlunk's Cousin. Has a fiery temper and is rather annoyed at small problems. ((Talks in Red))

[color=Brown]Mashlunk-Grashnag and Galfank's Cousin. Has poor pronunciation at times. Likes to read the Word-Page. Rather unopinionated. Likes to complain about the state of the world. ((talks in Brown))

Braklag-Grashmuk's Brother. A fool at times. Enjoys the simple pleasures of life. ((Talks in Green))

Grashmuk-Braklag's Brother. The brainy one of the group. Quiet and withdrawn. ((Talks in Blue))

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-12, 09:28 PM
Fualkner brushes the pie crumbs off his upper lip.

Well, I'm going to leave for a couple minutes. send me a spider note if you need me.

He puts a spider on the table. with a wave of his fingers, he opens a dimentional door.

Hey, zombierockstar. my pie lets you cast this 3 times in one hour. just to let you know.

With a wink, he steps through the glowing blue door.

2006-08-12, 10:40 PM
Cool! I probably won't use it now, but that's still cool!

He returns to his acoustic.

By special request of the bartender...

In the tribe where I was born
Was a shaman, oh so brave.
And he told us of his life
In a yellow dungeon cave.

So we walked into the sun
'Till we found the entrance cave.
And we lived beneath the stone
In a yellow dungeon cave.

We all live in a yellow dungeon cave.
A yellow dungeon cave.
A yellow dungeon cave.
We all live in a yellow dungeon cave.
A yellow dungeon cave.
A yellow dungeon cave.

After finishing and seeing, to his dismay, no tips so far, he begins packing up.

I'll be back in a bit. I have to make an appearance over at the music festival. He leaves the bar.

2006-08-12, 11:01 PM
the goblins look in their pockets but can;t find enough to make a decent tip.

2006-08-13, 12:51 PM
((ooc: O my god, Lmao, zombierockstar! that was hilarious, both spoofs!,post me a link to your other gig's, i wanna hear them,
renrik: i'll take control sometimes, but if you could use them when you're not busy, as i am generally asleep when everyone is online,if you're too busy, though, i get it.))
a single tear drops from the beholder's......umm...single eye
beautiful, mr.rockstar,here, here is my tip!.......i must admit i play a little,trombone,harmonica..etc. but nowhere near your talent with that instrument! he floats a gold piece into the guitar case, and a severed halfling head. Puffball begins to sing the song in a high-pitched voice , and wiggles his eyestalks in a vague attempt at air-guitar.
such a shame that there is noone here to admire it, or enjoy fualknar's wondeful pie....still it's to be expected, i cant really compete with trog's tavern...oh well. Mr.samedi, you're hired.you'll get a fraction of our income, which right now is nothing, but still, i welcome you with open arms..

2006-08-13, 12:54 PM
News has reached the Pub that several attacks of incredible scale have shaken the slums, docks, and shadow depths last night.

The goblins moourn.

2006-08-13, 07:54 PM
((Other parodies are over in the thread entitled "Waterfront Music Festival." Parodies of Nirvana, the Doors, and Janis Joplin are there.))

ZombieRockStar returns to the bar, and hears the news of the attack on the dock. He shakes his head. Damn all this war!

Thanks for the tip, man. Don't worry, the pub will grow.

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-13, 08:09 PM
Fualkner walks into the pub, clapping with all four hands.

Great job, mr. zombie! Lovely song!

He flicks four gold coins towards the guitar case. one of them clatters to the ground.

Don't worry, beholder. we've only been here 4 days. We'll steal some customers from that Trog soon.

Fualkner goes into the kitchen, and soon everyone can here snippets of the Yellow Dungeon Cave song floating out from the room.

2006-08-13, 08:14 PM
((right. Let Trog have the normal happy types, give the monsters to Beholder, and send the creepy criminal element to The Den.))

2006-08-14, 05:44 AM
Samedi bows and proceeds to take his station behind the bar

I'm perfectly alright with the income, I just need a place to stay. Oh, one more thing. Is it alright if I keep my hat? People have a tendency to steal it. I would rather your customers don't end in a paste on your lovely barroom floor.

2006-08-14, 05:51 AM
Samedi then closes his "eyes" for a minute.

Excuse me, I need to take care of business a the temple of Bahamut. I'll leave a Samedi clone in my place. He's a bit slow and you might need to speak up, but he is fairly alert.

Samedi proceeds to take off his hat and reaches in, his full arm in despite the hat not being long enough. He then proceeds to pull a figure, almost indentical to Samedi, except with a white tux and no top hat. He walks in the direction of the door.

I shouldn't be long, just make sure he works for me.

Samedi exits.

2006-08-14, 11:47 AM
ZombieRockStar celebrates his new tips by ordering a pint of Diemonkein.

2006-08-14, 09:35 PM
here ya go sir, says Braklag as he gives the Demonkein to the zombie.

Big fan, by the way.

Mashlunk speaks:Sez here in the Word-Page that the Sons of maglubiet are fighting the Goblin Statehood Amy. Sad times.

2006-08-15, 07:23 AM
Samedi walks in. He takes his place behind the bar and sucks the Samedi clone into his top hat.

Goblin civil wars eh? I remember the time they thought goblins would go extinct because of all the infighting. A few mages and I had to dramatically increase the birth rate to keep 'em alive. That was a long time ago of course...

Samedi takes a look around.

Where's the boss?

2006-08-15, 10:27 PM
You guys hear about what happened at the festival today? Some ninja comes onstage, pushes me off in the middle of a song, starts singing something about hating goblins, and runs off. Few seconds later, a goblin army goes chasing after him. Weirdest damn thing I ever saw.

The zombie's demeanor has changed slightly, growing a bit more flamboyant. He has removed his glasses and the combat jacket, exposing a tight t-shirt. ((Chanelling Freddy Mercury))

He stands up and wanders over to his usual performing corner, which has become a sort of stage to him. There is a piano there, where he begins playing softly.

Is this the unlife?
Or is this just fantasy?
Caught in a landslide.
No escape from reality.
Open your eyes.
Look up to the skies and see...

I'm just a zombie, I need no sympathy.
Because I'm easily turned, easy go.
Little high. Little low.
I hae no intelligence,
Nothing really matters to me.
To me.

Mamma, just killed a man.
Tore off his head,
Ate his brains and now he's dead.
Mamma, unlife has just begun.
But some bastard cleric raised me from the dead...
Mamma, ooh...
I wasn't allowed to die.
If I'm not back again this time tomorrow,
Carry on. Carry on.
'Cause it doesn't really matter.

I see a littly holy symbol on the man.
Oh Pelor, oh Pelor, will you turn this undead-oh?
Thunderbolt of lightning! Very, very frightning!
Gallileo! Gallileo. Gallileo! Gallileo.
Gallileo Figaro.

I'm just a zombie. Nobody loves me.
He's just a zombie from a poor family.
He lives his unlife as a monstrosity.

Easy come, easy go.
Will you let me go?
By Pelor, NO! We will not let you go!
Let him go!
We will not let you go!
Let me go!
Will not let you go!
Let me go...
No! No! No! NO!
Oh mamma mia, mamma mia!
Mamma mia let me go!
Beelzebub has a coffin put aside for me.
For me.

*Gets up and starts wailing on the guitar*

So you think you can turn me and hack me all night?
So you think you can turn me an leave me to die?
Oh baby! Can't do this to me baby!
Just gotta get out! Just gotta get right outta mia...

Nothing really matters.
Anyone can see.
Nothing really matters...
Nothing really matters...
To meeeeee...

2006-08-16, 02:40 AM
Teleports in halfway through song
Hello, I'm glad thats over and done with. I finaly got rid of those dam goblins.
Your a good singer for a Zombie you know?
Gestures towards ZombieRockStar
By the way, where am I? I just teleported out of Trogs tavern with about 500 goblins on my tail.
Disguise self
(adds fake mustash)
No goblins will recognise me now!

2006-08-16, 05:17 AM
Samedi blinks his "eyes" for a second.

Aw heck. I know that guy. Chaotic to the extreme. He isn't a ninja, just a wierdo sorceror I met on my travels.

Samedi takes a look around and pulls his Samedi clone out again. He looks at Zombie.

Tell the boss if he comes back I'm going out. Business again.

Samedi exits.

2006-08-16, 05:20 AM
Another inquisitioner of Tiamat

A half red dragon half gnome walks in and picks a large piece of paper to start to read.

Villagers of the town, hereby Tiamat decleres Gezina van den Vechte an enemy of the faith! For crimes commited against the chromatic dragon she's sentenced to Death! Any brave citizen who brings her to the temple of Tiamat gains 10,000 platinum pieces and one favor from the goddess herself!

The halfdragon goes to the bar and orders a Spitfire

2006-08-16, 05:23 AM
The hatless Samedi hands over a Spitfire.


2006-08-16, 05:25 AM
Another inquisitioner of Tiamat

The halfdragon takes the drink

Thanks, have you seen the enemy of the faith?

2006-08-16, 05:28 AM
The Samedi clone wavers slightly

Master.. knows Gezina... master..have top hat.. master leave... tell me..."follow orders"...

2006-08-16, 05:30 AM
Anothe inquisitioner of Tiamat

The halfdragon sips his drink

So, where is this master of yours, I need to find her

2006-08-16, 05:33 AM
Samedi clone blinks

Master went outside.. master look for someone...

2006-08-16, 05:34 AM
Another inquisitioner of Tiamat

Ah, do you think he'll come back here?

2006-08-16, 05:36 AM
Samedi clone shrugs

Master can go for long time...master go out...may come back later...to get me...

2006-08-16, 07:11 AM
The true Samedi enters. He sees the inquisitor waiting there. He then turns without a word and runs.

2006-08-16, 07:18 AM
whispers to semadi
I've got them off my tail. I rused them with an illusion. I got an illusionary guy named froobytwo to confess to the crime before stabbing himself with a knife. I think I got rid of them, the goblins too, but I'm now a "not quite wanted man" for the homicide of 500 goblins Fingers his mostash nervously, Is there any way I could hide out here until it dies down? I mean, just working out the back in the brewery?
((g2g will post anin in morning))

2006-08-16, 09:15 AM
((Well, I can't tell if he's supposed to be a ninja or not. I just met him))

Hey! You pushed me off stage! And if you have something against goblins, go somewhere else! This is a monster-friendly pub. We even have some goblins working here, so don't be bringing your prejudices down on us, man!

2006-08-16, 01:10 PM
beholder floats out of the back.
Yawnn...refreshing sleep... so now whats been happening around here? hmmm i see we have a customer...he also seems to be a speciesist....i suggest you look around the bar, sir, and regard our staff. and let me remind you that in here, you are the minority, and we won't but up with any adventurish behaviour.now if you have no problem with this bar, have a drink, a pie, a curry,pizza e.t.c. if not, i suggest you
FLEE LIKE THE SINIVELLING HUMANOID YOU ARE,OR I WILL DESTROY YOU AND GAIN BOTH SUSTENANCE AND AMUSEMANT FROM CONSUMING YOUR SMOKING REMAINS! please, excuse me, I'm taking monster management classes.but in you're case, I MEAN IT to everyone else, i have written my first modest article, and i hope you all take a chance to read the word-page, which is a fine example of a towncrier...now, anything else...ahh yes, Mr.Samedi, i have a list of ingredients we just got in, and a list of cocktail recipies...

basilisk eyes
dragon's blood
aboleth milk( don't ask me how i got that ;) )
cyanide drops
horse teeth

cocktails, feel free to invent you're own.these will be added to the menu if they're popular

Moonshine cocktail:
Xornoff vodka (30mls)
Allip spirits(60mls)
Aboleth milk (1 drop, no more)
phase wine
cyanide to taste

the drink of drinks. like been hit with a warm blanket wrapped in lead bars. if you can remember how to speak afterwards, then you probably already have a debilitating brain tumor. not for the faint of heart
serve in beer glass
basilisk eye
xornoff vodka
sweet or dry vermoth
cyanide to taste
mix togther djinn,vodka, and vermoth
garnish with basilisk eye and serve in yuantini (martini) glass.

anything else to do with the bar?
that blasted fighting. why do we fight one another? united we can conquer any adversity!

2006-08-16, 02:42 PM

The goblins working here would attack the guy on sight, except for two things.

1. They don't do that. They're proper, employed, civil gobliins.


2. Like evey other goblin in the city, they're striking. These particular goblins aren't skipping work because they hate their jobs (because they actually love them), but only to show support to the other goblins, who arestriking at the rest of town to protest unfair buisiness practices towards the mostrous races. The goblins hope that the employers that ARE fair to them (such as beholder), understand that they must join in the strike to help the cause.

2006-08-16, 04:53 PM
(( actually seeing as this is a very secluded kinda secret tavern it is possible the goblins here havn't in fact heard that their bretheran are fighting
And also they woudn't attack me as im in disguise.
{the disguise spell, 19 ranks, 26 charisma, i think it works ok} and you can see that under my pic))
Froobyone falls to his knee's and cries ;(
Please help me! I don't want to be arrested! I really need a place to stay. I swear that if you help me I will throw my predijuces aside, follow your lead, anything?!
Crawls over the beholder and goes face down in the dirt.
((It's funny though, that I would do this because a level 29 sorc,rougue,arc-trickster could normaly easily smash a measly beholder into the ground the ask for more. But then again you probably have class levels))

2006-08-16, 09:24 PM
You know what this place needs? says ZombieRockStar to Beholder. Some bloody bouncers is what this place needs. I mean, seriously. This guy sang a song about hating goblins. He's bleedin speciesist is what he is. I say kick him out.

2006-08-16, 09:37 PM
((yeah, I mean, he's looking for a suicide plane to divebomb goblins with.))

2006-08-17, 02:04 AM
Froobyone stops crying, turns around and faces ZombieRockStar. He is no longer crying, in fact he looks almost anger.
I'd like to see you talk ZombieRockStar.
You who sings about how zombies are a superior race too humans and also of taking over the world
Froobyone tightens his grip on his staff as he speaks
Don't dare talk to me about racism to me you Hipocrit

((by the way, how do you know that I am the guy that pushed you? If you hadn't noticed, I am wearing a mostash and it says under my avatar that I'm in diguise. Remebering that I have a charisma of 28 -magically altered, I have 19 ranks in disguise self, I have access to the disguise spell and I have a bluff score of (without charisma) 33 which give's a +2 bonus again, I have difficulty believing that even you, as prominent as you are, would have trouble getting past my check bluff check (1d20+30=46) (http://invisiblecastle.com/find.py?id=566759) without Meta gaming. and No I didn't announce to the room what I had done, I only wispered to the lich.))

2006-08-17, 02:16 AM
Samedi enters. He peeks around, looking for the inquisitor. On not seeing the inquisitor, he enters.

Sorry 'bout that boss, I had some work to do regarding...

He spots Froobyone

Aw heck, it's you! Have you taken leave of your tiny mind? Attacking goblin militants? Pretending to turn yourself in? Pushing our entertainer off stage? Dammit, this is deep. You should also be aware that beholders have very sensitive ears. Out of all the bars to do this, you picked the wrong one.

He turns to Beholder while taking his place behind the bar and removing the Samedi clone.

Sorry 'bout that boss. He tends to get a bit overexcited. Look, just let him stay here and I'll keep him under control.

2006-08-17, 02:27 AM
Sameid takes a look at the new ingredients.

Now here's something we can work with. Kittens+ aboleth milk... and voila

The kitten body has gone to a liquid state.

Drinkable kittens! The name needs work...but it'll be a hit, trust me. I came up with this recipie when I discovered that aboleth milk has many of the properties of aboleth mucus. I can also mix in other drinks with the milk and create falvour kittens. It'll be great for the toothless crowd. Try one yourself boss.

Samedi adds a shot of Dragon's blood, sticks the whole thing on a platter with a straw and hands it over.

2006-08-17, 06:34 AM
When Semadi appears, Froobyones anger instantly gutts out. Semadi seems to have a soothing effect of him.
Oh well then, this did seem like a good place to stay, but then again... That beholder obviosly dosn't like me.
Glares at beholder
Casts silent message to Semadi
{Spoiler}{{Meet me at the Generic Shack-tells Semadi location}}
Teleports out

2006-08-17, 07:32 PM
((You put your moustache on after you teleported into the bar. I'm not trying to offend you. This is all in good rp-ing fun, please remember.))

Hey, my songs are for comedic effect! Get a sense of humour, man! Mellow out. I'm not the one with 500 goblins chasing after me, he yells before the sorcerer teleports out.

2006-08-18, 02:18 AM
((ok thats ok then. btw the gobbo's are allready dead))
Heh heh heh

2006-08-18, 04:43 AM
I'm really sorry about that. He is a little chaotic, and not just in the alignment sense. I swear those few times I thought the world was going to end don't trouble me as much as this guy does.

2006-08-18, 04:46 AM
Samedi sighs and pulls out his Samedi clone.

Look boss, I'm sorry, I'd better go before he gets himself into more trouble. Besides, there is soemone I need to see.

Samedi exits.

2006-08-18, 12:13 PM
Sigh..he didn't even buy a drink...oh well.we haven't had a single customer, so i guess we'll just have to tighten our belts, metaphorically speaking...oh yes, i just remembered, i have good news, i have cross classed to commoner, hopefully now i can fit in with the main populus! hmmmm actually never mind he says as he looks himself up and down. i probably should have just bought another level in wizard...oh well. liquid kittens? i like it.anyone seen fualkar? he seems to have been gone a while. i hope he's alright...well, carry on everyone.

2006-08-18, 05:58 PM
Zombie orders another Deimonkein from the bar, drinks it, and takes the stage again.

((I'm currently Freddy Mercury, right?))

I've eaten my brains, time after time.
Eternity of unlife, a terrible time.
And rotting limbs...I have a few.
I've had my share of holy symbols in my face
But I'll come through!

And I mean to go on and on and on...

We are the zombies, my firends.
And we'll keep on fighting 'till the end.
We are the zombies!
We are the zombies!
No time for living, 'cause we are the zombies
Of the world!

You've taken my soul and my class levels.
You've brought me immortality
And everything that goes with it.
I thank you all.
But it's been no bed of roses. No pleasure cruise.
I consider it a challenge to destroy the human race
And I'll never loose!

We are the zombies, my firends.
And we'll keep on fighting 'till the end.
We are the zombies!
We are the zombies!
No time for living, 'cause we are the zombies
Of the world!

((Are these things getting a bit old, or is it just me who thinks that?))

2006-08-18, 07:05 PM
Massern the Blu Goblin teleports in
Perhaps here I will find people who are not predjiduced against me.
feels bored.

2006-08-20, 01:27 PM
Wait! sir!...sigh.goddamn sleeping habits..oh well.so, what news on the streets?
he begins polishing glasses.

2006-08-20, 05:34 PM
*As exidios walks In with a grin he looks around with his shining red eyes. He walks up to the bar and sit's down "Ah, It's good to see a humanoid bar once in a while." his skin pitch black with red demonic markings and black hair you can tell he Is a demon, With his schythe on his back and black armor with red and black cloak he says "I would like, A beer please" he tosses the gold on the counter and waits for the beholder to notice him.* ((Hello everyone.))

2006-08-21, 05:35 AM
A hatless skeletal figure in a white tux leans forward.


The figure hands Exodis a beer.

2006-08-21, 01:25 PM
the clone is right my good man, this bar is open to anyone, and thats what makes us special.
here is your drink, an icy-cold slaadweiser
so, you're a demon eh? i only knew one, but he taught me alot...what scythe is that? Mk. V? Mk. IV?
he taught me this song, maybe you know it zombie mercury? it's called knocking on Baator's door?
hell, i'll give it a go

he begins to sing in a deep, joe-cocker style voice

Balor take these horns offa me
i can't wear them anymore
it's getting bright, too bright to see,
i feel i'm
knocking on Baator's door

knock knocking on Baator's door
knock knocking on Baator's door
knock knocking on Baator's door
knock knocking on Baator's door

Balor put my trident in the ground
i can't wield it anymore
that big, stong paladin's coming round
i feel i'm
knocking on Baator's door
sorry zombie, i couldn't help it, i'll leave the singing to you next time.
he smiles sheepishly, and continues to clean glasses.

2006-08-21, 03:54 PM
*As Exidios chuckles he picks up his beer and drinks a bit of It once he was done "No, Sorry. I'm a demon of Zazumir, God Of Domination. And this schythe Is called, The Schythe Of Domination. Because as legend goes, This was the schythe of Zazumir himself.((Here Is my OOC character list Incase you need more Information: Click Here. (http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=town;action=display;num=1154109815;s tart=105#113)))"
he says. "Although, You have a good singing voice." he says again laughing..*

2006-08-21, 06:33 PM
Nope. Dont know that one. I don't know many demon songs, mostly undead ones. ((Sorry, but Bob Dylan, the original singer of that, isn't dead yet, though that was a good parody))

((Let's see...time for a new one. Who can I parody...I know! Jerry Garcia!))

Though I think you might like this one...

Zombie stands on stage with his acoustic and begins to play a rollicking pattern.

I got out from the graveyard, chased by cleric men
Didn't get to sleep that night, I slept in the mornin'.
Said I'd run, but I'll take my time
A friend of a zombie is a friend of mine,
If I get out before daylight
I just might eat your brains tonight...

Ran down to the graveyard but the zombie caught me there.
Ate my brains and ate my flesh and vanished in the air.
Said I'd run, but I'll take my time
A friend of a zombie is a friend of mine,
If I get out before daylight
I just might eat your brains tonight...

Got a brain in Reno and one in Tenesse
First one's the brain of a child; he was slain by me.
Said I'd run, but I'll take my time
A friend of a zombie is a friend of mine,
If I get out before daylight
I just might eat your brains tonight...

*Amazing guitar solo*

Got two reasons why I roam, looking for brains each night.
First one is that I'm undead, I eat brains for delight.
Second one is clerics, baby. A priest is on my trail.
And if he catches up to me I'll spend unlife in Hell.

Got a brain in Reno and one in Tenesse
First one's the brain of a child; he was slain by me.
Said I'd run, but I'll take my time
A friend of a zombie is a friend of mine,
If I get out before daylight
I just might eat your brains tonight...

2006-08-21, 06:35 PM
(( Anyone can Play Guitar by Radiohead might be a good song to parody... ))

2006-08-22, 02:28 PM
(i know it's bob dylan, and i understand you're trepidation. i nearly hit a guy when he told me that avril lavigne wrote it, and that bob dylan covered for it. I mean, WTF!?! its just as annoying as "behind blue eyes" by the who, or if you have no brain, limp bizkit.disgusting. oh yeah, excellent parody, yet again ;D)

drinks anyone? zombie, have a slaadweiser, on the house.Do you know "behind nine eyes?" it was written by a band called The Whom, with a beholder singer, zombie drummer,orgerish bassist, and...well, nobody's sure what the lead guitarist was.

2006-08-22, 05:38 PM
((I've just met so many people who think that it's a GnR song *shudders* Dylan needs better PR on the songs he writes))

I love that song! Here, Let me play it for you...

No one knows what it's like
To be the monster
A beholder
Behind nine eyes

No one knows what it's like
To be hated
To be fated
To be slain by "good" guys

But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my alignment seems to be

I have turns, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

No one knows what it's like
To have spell-like powers
Like I do
And I blame the DM

No one bites back as hard
On the PC's
But for all my pain and woe,
I'll never defeat them.

But my dreams
They aren't as empty
As my alignment seems to be

I have turns, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free

When my eyes open, clench them closed
Before I use them and lose my cool
When I disintegrate, stay together
I'll use confuse and make you act like a fool

I know I'm always Lawful Evil
But I'm also Intelligence 18
I have feelings and emotions,
No need to be so mean.

No one knows what it's like
To be the monster
A beholder
Behind nine eyes.

((Best I could do.))

Zombie sits down to drink his beer.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-22, 06:13 PM
(Zombie, your skills put me to shame and make me jealous.)

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-22, 06:16 PM
Fualkner comes clattering out of the kitchen, chased by an army of pots and pans.

Ahh! Feel my wrath, you bloodly huanted pile of spare metal!

Fualkner pulls out a huge metal ring, its edges jagged and sharp. His throws it at the pots and pans, slicing them all in half. They clatter tothe cold ground.

Sorry, beholder... your pots were all animated. I'll fix this... with these.

He opens a small pouch on his back pocket, and pulls out scroll after scroll of mending.

It'll take a while to fix these, gunvor. See you soon!

He drags the huge lump of pans into the kitchen.

2006-08-22, 08:22 PM
((I'm no Weird Al, but thank you.))

2006-08-22, 10:14 PM
yordan the cabbage grower returns to the town, and in doing that, sits down at the bar

got anything pan-galactic?

2006-08-23, 05:52 AM
Samedi enters the door.

Okay boss, I'm REALLY sorry for all the departures, but I had some construction work to oversee.

Samedi picks up the clone and resumes his place behind the bar. He spots Exodis.

You seem shockingly familiar. Haven't we met before?

2006-08-23, 06:43 AM
Gerzoks enters tavern.
You promised to pay me for the statues Semadi. I have come to collect.

2006-08-23, 01:01 PM
beautiful, simply beautiful, excellent work zombie. yordan, we have the moonshine cocktail, which is quite pan-galactic,like been hit with a warm blanket wrapped in lead bars.i wouldn't try standing or any complex activities after it, and please gerzok, be pleasant.order a drink. he winks, and floats a bag over to zombie rockstar, it contains a beautiful violin
i don't know if you can use that, it used to belong to my wife before.....the paladin. anyway, i can't use it, so i was wondering if you'd like it?

2006-08-23, 01:59 PM
Thanks, man. I don't know what to say. Any particular song you'd like to hear on it?

2006-08-23, 02:49 PM
Torch enters the pub and looks around. Seeing a menu, he moves to a location where he can better see his choices. After about a minute of looking, he approaches whoever seems to be in charge of dispencing foodstuffs.
I'd like an iguana curry.
Once his food is dispensed and payment is taken care of, he navigates himself to a table and starts eating.

About halfway through his meal, Torch looks up.
*sigh* always when I'm eating...
He closes his eyes and concentrates for a few moments, then goes back to eating.
damn simus, the fight ended before I finished posting

2006-08-23, 08:49 PM
Take it up with Sperruset Gerzok. He's the one who hired you, not me.

2006-08-24, 02:13 AM
Then where can I find him?

2006-08-24, 02:27 AM
...ZZZzzzz Gnhuh?
Torch wakes up rather suddenly, looking around for a few moments before remembering where he was. Looking down at his now cold food, he picks up the dish, holds his other hand under it, and ignites it, holding it there for a minute to reheat his food. Once the food is back at a proper eating temperature, he extinguishes his hand and resumes eating.

After finishing his food, Torch leaves a gold coin on the table and exits the pub.

2006-08-24, 05:39 AM
Samedi shrugs.

Probably out of town. He won't pay you. And he has a fair few buddies to back him up.

2006-08-24, 02:56 PM
i don't really mind, zombie, i'd say make sure you treat it with respect, but i know you will. and also, good news our first paying customer!
the beholder beams, and holds up 3 gold coins.
that's 1 gold for the gob's, 1 for fualknar, and 1 for zombie.or we can keep it in the kitty, and i can pay to get this place redecorated. your choice guys.

2006-08-24, 11:01 PM
Zombie hands the coin back to Beholder.

If you want to redecorate, go ahead, man. I'm fine for now, since I don't really need to eat, per se. (As long as the free drinks keep coming wink wink nudge nudge)

2006-08-25, 02:19 AM
In other words, I'm not being paid.
Doesn't matter though.
turns to beholder
I'd like a place to stay. I place I can call home while in this town. I noticed the sign on the front saying you're hiring people. looking hopeful.
How would you like me to go around advertising this pub in return for bedding?

2006-08-25, 05:46 AM
A massive figure walks into the bar. It towers at over 12ft and its body is made completely of iron. Perched at the top is a jar, in which a brain floats in blue-green liquid. He walks towards the bar.

Master Samedi, there has been a complication.

Samedi sighs.
What is it professor?

At-Sperruset has vanished from our possible reconnaisance.

2006-08-25, 09:09 AM
Looks at Golem.
Dahm that!
Punches wall which cracks under the blow.
Oops, good thig I have this wand of mending just for accidents like these.
pulls out wand and Mends wall.

((W00+! Finally a Barbarian in the Playground!))

2006-08-25, 11:45 AM
We'll take you on,for free bedding, but you'll have to buy food if you want any. if the customer flow increases, i'll start paying you, and give you free food.also, any animosity between you and mr.samedi should be quelled during working hours. and please refrain from punching my pub. pleased to have you aboard!

2006-08-25, 07:43 PM
Thankyou. I'll be going off to tell people about this place then.
((how do you link pictures to sites?))
Walks out ((110 ft heh heh heh))

2006-08-26, 04:42 AM
The professor takes a look at Gerzok as he walked out.

It would seem to me that the individual was displaying an arrogant depiction of his physical capabilities. How uncouth.

Samedi would have his eyebrow cocked if he had any...

It always amazes me how you can be disdainful of strength professor, even when your strength is the best i've ever been able to acheive with any construct.

The Professor makes a bubbly sighing sound

I assure you Samedi, your transformation of my abilities, while greatly appreciated have not left me with any greater approval of overt displays of force. I shall have to depart now.

The professor stomps out of the tavern.

2006-08-26, 12:34 PM
hey samedi, hello professor, pleasure to meet you.anyone seen zombie? or fualknar?

2006-08-26, 12:38 PM
Zombie walks back into the bar. I'm here. Need anything?

2006-08-26, 04:58 PM
The goblins working here are no longer on strike.

2006-08-27, 06:23 AM
Well, I'm glad that those strikes are over. Things sure are quiet around here.

Fualkner Asiniti
2006-08-27, 10:15 AM
Fualkner's voice floats out of the kitchen.

Hey, I'm almost done fixing these pots... but unfortunatly, I have to leave for a couple of days. apperently, someone has been bothering the spiders by the outskirts of Exxar, and I need to go knock some sense into them. G'bye!

2006-08-27, 02:07 PM
sorry zombie, i was beginning to think you'd always be around.very foolih of me, a musician goes where he wants.as for the goblins, i'm glad to have you back. while you were on strike, you earned a gold piece. do you want to keep it or put it towards the pub's redecoration?

2006-08-27, 03:27 PM
Need to make a living man, but I'll always come back here. We've just been having a little trouble with some werewolves.

He returns to the stage, ready to rock.

((A little AC/DC, currently chanelling Bon Scott))

No longer livin', but livin' free.
You're a zombie, it's a Hell of a ride.
Eating brains, leave me be.
Killing all humans in my stride.
Don't need reason. Don't need rhyme.
Ain't nothin' that I'd rather do.
Eatin' brains! Party time!
My friends are gonna be with me too.

I'm in the Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!

Don't turn me!

*wicked awesome guitar solo, even if Angus Young isn't dead*

No crosses, holy water.
Ain't nothin' gonna slow me down.
Kill the living, holy father.
Ain't nothing gonna push me around.
Hey Satan! Payin' my dues!
Playing in a Rockin' band.
Hey Mamma! Look at me!
I dug my grave in the promised land.

I'm in the Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!
Graveyard of Hell!

And I'm going down...
All the way!!!

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 10:59 PM
*A frustrated llama trots into the tavern and plops down in an arm chair. Its an odd sight to see. He apologizes if he's being rude and orders a Spitfire.*

2006-08-29, 11:04 PM
A man wanders in and looks around.


Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:10 PM
*Atreyu's mumbling something about people changing but still being jerks. He looks up as he hears his name and sees a stranger. He assumes this person is shocked to see a llama in a chair.* "Yup. The only llama in Town." *He smirks* "Don't be shocked, I can talk. Its when I juggle that you'll be really impressed."

2006-08-29, 11:11 PM
Seriously....nobody recognizes me with this new look...

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:16 PM
*Atreyu studies him and looks at the sword and back at him.* "Ares?" *he says very confused* "or..." *there is a glint of hope in the back of his eyes*

2006-08-29, 11:19 PM
It's me Llama...I'm back! Kyrian smiles at his friend.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:21 PM
*As fast as the llama can move, Kyrian finds himself trapped in a woolly embrace.* "But...but...but...I don't care how." *the embrace continues*

2006-08-29, 11:23 PM
Kyrian smiles, and pets the llama.

I missed you too, my friend. Tell me.....how's...Ceika doing?

His voice falters once or twice as he asks.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:27 PM
*His tail droops a little, but only slightly.* "Well, she was really sad, but handled it very....well, I guess. Umm...I got you a tombstone. Have you seen it?"

2006-08-29, 11:29 PM
I haven't visited there yet, but believe me, I was there in spirit, when you put it in. Thank you Llama, it was very thoughtful of you.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:33 PM
*the llama bleats happily, obviously very moved and proud to hear it was liked.*

"So...umm...what now?"

2006-08-29, 11:34 PM
I need to get some rest. Please, if you see Ceika, don't tell her, I want to suprise her.

((Starting to fall asleep, few more posts in me.))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:39 PM
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."
"You go get some sleep. I'm gonna finish my drink. Sheesh that Merant can be a real jerk sometimes. Is why I came here, cuz I was afraid of smarting off too him if he was stil at Trog's. And this place makes a nice curry."

(V Goodnight)

2006-08-29, 11:40 PM
Kyrian gives the llama a smile, and hugs him once more, before leaving.

((G'night all))

2006-08-29, 11:44 PM
A voice can be heard from outside.


The door to the Pub swings up, Indurain stands in the doorway, still covered in dirt, and caked on mud. He holds a bright multi-coloured cloak in his hands. (recognizable as Gwen's).

"Is Earin in here?"

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:46 PM
"Huh? Indurain? Is that you? Is that the cloak I gave Gwen? No, Earin's not here. Is everything alright?"
*The llama's voice is filled with concern.*

2006-08-29, 11:48 PM
Indurain turns towards the Llama, and his face drops. A look of anger crosses his face. He tosses the cloak on the ground and stalks towards the Llama.

"No Earin, but this is even better...my 'best friend' or so they say."

2006-08-29, 11:49 PM
((*gets popcorn and a diet coke. Takes seat. Watches.*))

2006-08-29, 11:51 PM
((getsa eager'cause Mal's off to bed and he wanted some bloody satisfaction))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-29, 11:53 PM
(charges Oskar 10 GP for admission)

*Atreyu looks shocked and starts to smirk then sees in Indurain's eyes that he's not joking around.*

"What? What are you upset about? Of course, I'm your best friend. "

(Mal, since you're goingto bed and won't get to see it live, you only owe us 5 GP.)

2006-08-29, 11:55 PM
((Grabs rootbeer. Grabs doritos. watches by scrying.))

2006-08-29, 11:55 PM
"Oh really? Does a best friend sabatoge romances? Does a best friend sit back and watch while his friend is being humiliated? Or how about when he's being punched in the groin? Is that how best friends treat each other? Cuz if so I've been doing this whole thing wrong."

2006-08-29, 11:57 PM
((ahh, what the hell))
((gets a chicken sandwich, a glass of Maracuya, and sits to watch until called))
((IOY Llama, you can ask for stuff from Forge, Ren or me later....))

2006-08-29, 11:59 PM
((Man, you're all making me hungry.))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:01 AM
*realization sets in. In all the mess with Merant and kyrian, his prank a few ago was near the back of his mind.*
*Anger starts to flash in his eyes.*

"You stupid piece of shock. You hurt two kind, caring women with your selfish double-dating trick and you're upset over a groin punch and a set of flowers that forced you to do what you should have done in the first place. I can't believe you were going to have me help you lie to Paige and Librarian like that."

*He spits on the floor in anger, glaring at Indurain.*

2006-08-30, 12:04 AM
Indurain's eyes widen with shock.

"You didn't want to help? THAT'S FINE. Then say that, but don't betray me like that. You set me up for that embarrasment. Everything that happened that night is all because of you."

Indurain swallows hard, and continously clenches and unclenches his fists.

"I know now what I did was wrong. But that was for me to figure out on my own! Not for some pathetic excuse of a pack animal to throw in my face."

2006-08-30, 12:04 AM
((Man, you're all making me hungry.))
((suck ti up you wuss! you're canadian!, you can handle it!))

2006-08-30, 12:04 AM
((suck ti up you wuss! you're canadian!, you can handle it!))

We can handle cold, not hunger. We hate hunger...and sobreity.

2006-08-30, 12:08 AM
((hah! don't talk to me about sobriety...as far as i know, i have low resistance to alcohol!))

2006-08-30, 12:09 AM
((Agreed. I'm Canadian too. Oh, and summer sucks because its all hot out.))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:12 AM
"Betray you? I didn't know what was going on until Gwen told me. You were going to use me!"

*He looks at Indurain's fists and starts tapping his front right hoof against the ground.*
"Pathetic Pack Animal! I'm not the one who had two women who both wanted to spend time iwth me, and lost them both because I was greedy."

*mutters* "I'll never see Mileena again and he doesn't respect what special thing he had.

2006-08-30, 12:16 AM
"No...because you couldn't get a woman...unless she shaved her name into your ass first!"

Indurain steps right up to the Llama, their noses almost touching.

"You know...I used to think you were truly a noble animal, but now I see you're no different from anybody else in this town. You're all out to get me. Well, I am NOT going to stand by and let that happen."

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:23 AM
"No one needs to get you. You did a fine job of shocking things up for yourself and do NOT talk about Mileena like that or I will give you a beating you will NEVEREEEEEEVER forget!"

*Atreyu stares down the Emperor, his mouth moves and the phrase* Just give me a reason *escape his lips*

(I miss Chris Jericho. I really do.)

2006-08-30, 12:24 AM
"You want a reason? Do you really want a reason?"

Indurain's face is pure anger as he stares deep into the eyes of the Llama.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:27 AM
*His own face a twisted mask of barely contained rage.*

2006-08-30, 12:30 AM
Indurain slaps the Llama across the face.

"There ya go."

Indurain's fists shoot up in front of him, anticipating a counter attack.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:33 AM
*Atreyu grins/snarls and spits straight for Indurain's eyes, as he does, his right foreleg's hoof drives forward aiming for the stomach of the Emperor.*

2006-08-30, 12:37 AM
The spit hits Indurain in the eyes, but before he loses his sight, he sees the kick coming, and manages to get out of the way.

He wipes the spit from his eyes.

"I'm going to enjoy this."

Spinning Heel kick, headed straight for the Llama's cranium.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:42 AM
"You're going to enjoy this? Never knew you were a guy who loved getting the hell beat out of him."
*Atreyu ducks, and the kick barely glances against his ears causing a dull ringing, but nothing more. The llama bites at the leg the Emperor is standing on while Indurain is still off balance.*

2006-08-30, 12:45 AM
Indurain manages to pull his leg away, but this sends him tumbling to the ground.


2006-08-30, 12:47 AM
((damm!, i have to go now, i'm starting to hallucinate...))
((huh? oh, hi mr. decapitated clown, you want me to drink tea with you and the five-eyed, giant crow? ok, i'll do that....))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:49 AM
*The llama leaps on his fallen opponent, attempting to pin the nudist under his weight. He also aims a hoof at Indurain's face.*

(yikes 30 minute warning!)

2006-08-30, 12:51 AM
Indurain takes the hoof to the face, but lifts his own leg up so that the weight of the crashing Llama hits it square in the Llama's midsection.

"I can take some punishment animal...how about you?"

Indurain then swings a punch for the Llama's head.

2006-08-30, 12:54 AM
((I go out, I come back and suddenly this place has become interesting *sits down to watch*))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 12:59 AM
*Llama rolls off gasping for breath and takes the headshot as his lungs pull for air. A small trickle of blood dribbles from his mouth, but it only makes him smile.* "Human, I can take anything you can give. The thought of the Librarian crying will give keep me going until your own family wouldn't recognize you"

*Again spit flies at the face of the Emperor and a hoof shoots out, this time aimed Indurain's leg.*

(^ I'm glad you approve, ZRS. After all, you are the official entertainer of the Pub, aren't you?)

2006-08-30, 01:02 AM
Indurain sees the spit coming, but in avoiding it, he takes the full brunt of the kick to the leg. A cracking noise is heard, and a look of sheer pain and panic crosses Indurain's face.

"I...I..." He stammers.

Suddenly his face turns red with anger, and he lashes out with a series of vicious punches aimed right at the Llama's face.

((Hey ZRS, you coming to Fan Expo??))

2006-08-30, 01:06 AM
((This is as good as any of my parodies could be. I don't know what it's about, but still. The downside is that I now have a profoundly disturbing image of a llama fighting a naked guy in my head.))

((Indurain: Yes. I bumped the thread in FB. Go look.))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:07 AM
*Llama doesn't try to block the punches, he takes the flurry of blows, but retaliates with a hoof uppercut, hoping Indurain is too distracted with his successful strikes to dodge it.* "This one's for Paige!"

2006-08-30, 01:10 AM
Indurain goes flying back into the air from the force of Llama's punch, and crashes through one of the tables. Bottles and alcohol go spilling everywhere.

Indurain grabs a broken ginger beer bottle, and holds it out menacingly towards the Llama, however it's very clear he's putting no weight on his left leg, which Llama had kicked.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:15 AM
*LLama's eyes grow wide when Indurain actually threatens him with a deadly weapon.* *for a second, rational thought re-enters his mind.* "Are you that crazed? You'd stab me? Look at you! You're the Emperor!"

*llama's face starts to look lumpy and he feels his mask getting tighter as swelling from the blows sets in.*

2006-08-30, 01:17 AM
Indurain pauses for a moment as the Llama's words sink in. The bottle drops to the floor as his body goes limp. He crashes to the floor, and falls back against the bar. Still staring at the Llama, he can barely speak.

"I...I'm sorry...I..."

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:20 AM
*Llama relaxes his stance and looks at his friend, asking with genuine concern in his voice.* "Feel better?"

2006-08-30, 01:24 AM
((*Pulls up a chair...*))

2006-08-30, 01:24 AM

Indurain hangs his head down low.

"Lla...Atreyu...I'm sorry. I don't know know what's come over me lately."

Indurain covers his face, hoping the Llama won't see his tears.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:28 AM
*the llama trots over and says a quick prayer to Inari and his hoof starts glowing.*
"I forgive you." *He says, sadness filling his own voice over what just happened.* "High hoof?" *he holds the glowing hoof up to Indurain. Healing magic courses through it.*

2006-08-30, 01:32 AM
Indurain looks up at the Llama through tear-soaked eyes. A smile comes across his face, the first in 2 days.

"High hoof." He says, slapping the Llama's hoof.

The wound in his leg begins to heal, though a huge bruise still remains.

Indurain uses his own healing powers to heal up the rest of his wounds.

((The Emperor's high five also contains healing, so get rid of some of those nasty lumps on your ugly mug. ;) ))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:41 AM
*Atreyu smiles; he starts to wince but stops as the swelling fades.*

"Let's get you home. You can work on how to apologize and atone later. But if I don't see any progress in a week, I'm gonna swing by Mortia's shop, grab a kendu stick, some barbed wire, and a bag of tacks and really make you regret it." *His tail wags as he goes over his shopping list and he laughs.*

(okay, bed time for me. He'll help Indurain home, especiialy since the nudist's leg looks to be in bad shape. Its only cure light wounds after all.)

(so Indurain, who all owes us GP?)

2006-08-30, 01:44 AM
"I've got some C4 covered wooden planks with your name on them. Don't forget it." Indurain says, as he limps into the night.


Vinde: 10 GP
Mal: 10 GP
Destro: 10 GP
Oscar: 10 GP

Overall, a pretty nice haul. I feel like a real amateur wrestler now.))

((G'night Llama...always a pleasure.))

2006-08-30, 01:48 AM
((not me. I wasn't directly there. *shifty eyes*))
((unless you have detect scrying?))
((whatever. *tosses platinum piece to Indurain*))

2006-08-30, 05:42 AM
Samedi wakes up.

Wait...what the?! customers? Indurian? Artreyu? What's going on?

He snaps at the barworkers.

Wake up you useless sods, we have customers!

He suddenly realised that everyone is gone.

Damn it, most action that ever went on in this place and I missed it.

2006-08-30, 12:50 PM
Apparently they were fighting over a girl, or more than one girl, I don't know.

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-30, 01:49 PM
*the door is pushed open by a llama wearing a black mask. he has a black collar with blue gems on and a holy symbol of Inari on a chain hanging from his neck*

"Maybe now I can finish my drink in peace. I can't believe I raised a hoof in anger against Indurain last night. Thank the Gods it stopped before it got out of hand."

(Sporatic posts, at best.)

2006-08-30, 02:14 PM
((Pays up...in electrum.))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-08-31, 01:09 AM
(I'll take it, the exchange rates are great for electrum)

*Atreyu finishes his third or fourth Spitfire and continues to relax. After a bit, he gets up and trots out of the pub, leaving behind 13 coppers and an I.O.U. offering to help with any pack animal needs the Pub might have.*

2006-08-31, 02:42 PM
Thank you come again.
buy something next time?
mops up blood, spit, and alcohol.brushes glass into a tray, then disintergrates it.

Good news is if those guys pay damages, we should be able to redecorate.

hmmmm.we need more of these.they attract customers.hey llama, feel free to bring barfights here ok? or any activity you fancy

2006-08-31, 09:37 PM
Perhaps we should advertise this as "The location of the historic battle between Indurain and Atreyu."

2006-09-01, 03:41 AM
Yarram flies into the tavern.
I can't get any service at trogs. I'll just get a drink here. He says as he pours himself a glass of ale before placing 5 gold peices on the table.
This should cover my costs.
He sits down on a stool.

Narcille enters the tavern, looking at the several sleeping figures on the ground.
Is this a slumber party or something? he asks before sitting down on a stool next to Yarram.

No I don't think so... Hello, Narcille.The minatour says as he pours two more drinks and slides one accross the table.

Narcille starts to look excited, Yarrim? I havn't seen you in years! What have you been up to you scoundral.

Well you know... Just the usual stuff... Mercenary action, areana fighting, the like...
Actually I'm looking for a proper job. I have a part time job at a daycare cente but thats not a real job.

Why don't you get a job here then? I mean, we could both work together here just like old times!

You mean this place is hiring! Why didn't I know that?

The sign is just outside. Besides, you can't read remember.

Oh... Right.

Narcille and Yarram wait for someone to show up.

2006-09-01, 01:09 PM
we're always looking for help. we could use a bouncer or more waiters. i'm asleep during the day so we need people to talk to customers.
hey ZRS, is the llama famous? he's been here before. i didn't recognise the strangely pink humanoid however

2006-09-01, 08:15 PM
The naked one was Indurain, the Emperor.

2006-09-01, 09:31 PM
Yarram looks at the beholder,I'll be bouncer then. And he can serve people.Gestures at Narcille.
This place has been trashed. I'll stay here and fix it up a bit. Narcille says before grabbing a broom and begining to sweep up the broken stuff.

I'll be back later.
Yarram leaves tavern.
shortly after Narcille leaves too.
Narcille and Yarram walk into the tavern before laying out bedrolls and going to sleep in the corner.

2006-09-02, 12:35 PM
the emperor? you think he could afford some clothes!

2006-09-02, 12:43 PM
*What appears to be a bronze statue of a winged kobold walks in, notices the beholder and is a little taken aback at the sight*

Uh...I..er, should I go?

2006-09-02, 12:51 PM
of course not my good sir!
what takes your pleasure?
beer? curry? a nice yuantini? peruse our menu a moment and then decide!

2006-09-02, 12:54 PM
*Marrik looks slightly dubious*

Uh..no thanks...I, er..don't eat or drink...thanks.

*Marrik looks around and sees the posters adorning the walls and realisation dawns on him*

Oh, this must be Beholders...making you Beholder I suppose. Yarram was telling me that he is a bouncer here.

2006-09-02, 01:04 PM
that's me. i'm amazed. last town i went to my pub was burned down.here, people now my name before i meet them. i really like this place, very open minded.how about a cigar? 1 gold piece, genuine fungus cigars

2006-09-02, 01:09 PM
Can't breathe, so no thanks. Wouldn't do anything but look good...hmmm, on second thoughts. Wait, damn, I don't have any money. I don't get paid until sometime next week. Oh well.

What inspired you to open a tavern then? As far as I knew, most...of your kind went in for the whole world domination thing or whatever. Not that I mean to stereotype you or anything *Last sentence added hurridly*

2006-09-02, 01:20 PM
Well to tell the truth i did start out in the world domination gig, i masqueraded as grummsh's lost eye, and made myself a tribe of orc worshippers. then a group of adventurers wiped them out. so i joined a band for a while to make some money, and with the money from that i bought a mountain lair with some hydras and goblins. after about 3 years, a group of pc's came through and wiped out my minions. but i escaped. after this i tired of the domination game, and had a family, married the beholderess of my dreams and had two kids, Gargarax (my dad's name) and Puffball. after 3 years of happily married life, i discovered, all too late, that i had become infamous, and a mighty paladin had set out to destroy me once and for all. by the time i got home he had killed my wife and my first son Gargarax, but was mortally wounded himself. in that moment i realised that this species classification was hurting both sides more than it helped either. so i healed the paladin, and teleported away with puffball and all the other monsters in the moountain with me. thats how i got here, and i plan to use the money from the tavern to run monster awareness campaigns. but the paladin's still after me. well sorry for that long yarn, but you did ask. how about yourself? how'd you get statuefied?

2006-09-02, 01:28 PM
I like a good yarn, it's been so long since I've heard a good long tale. As it happens, I did it to myself. I was born a Dragonwrought Kobold, I think the term is and as such blessed of extremely long life. As I approached my 300th year, I started to fear my mortality and set out to find a way to escape the inevitable. The short of it is that I found a way, but at the cost of my living flesh, hence the form you see before you. At first, I thought it was a small price to pay for immortality, but I have now learn't differently...

*Marrik pauses with a sad look on his face for a moment, before continuing*

Anyway, that's all in the past now, though I suspect it will recur. I'm here now and a member of this towns illustious police force, as you can see.

*He shows his badge proudly*

Officer Marrik at your service
*Marrik smiles*

2006-09-02, 01:31 PM
pleasure to meet you sir! i was worried the police would shut us down. I'm glad to see you're not as prejudiced as those bloody paladins. have a cigar, on me!
the beholder grins a huge, toothy grin, and floats a cigar towards marrik

2006-09-02, 01:32 PM
Two Drow walk silently. They take a seat at the bar but don't order anything.

2006-09-02, 01:35 PM
beholder smiles at marrik
excuse me good sir, it's been a pleasure talking to you, but i just need to see to those two gentlemen

*he floats over to the two drow*

Can i take your orders please gentlemen?

2006-09-02, 01:38 PM
*Marrik grins and takes the cigar from the air, lighting it with a click of his claws, taking a deep inhalation, he blows out a long stream of smoke with the crackle of electricity flickering through it*

My thanks Beholder. You've certainly got this Officers approval. I like what you've done with the place.

*Marrik gestures to the decor with the cigar, walksover to and sits down at the bar.*

2006-09-02, 01:41 PM
We'll take the strongest ale you have I'll have a gecko curry as well

2006-09-02, 01:43 PM
*As Marrik sits down, he recognises the two Drow from Troggs earlier*

Hey, I recognise you, you're the two who attacked that paladin just a minute ago!

2006-09-02, 01:44 PM
Yeah? What about it?

2006-09-02, 01:46 PM
*Marrik stands up*

That's against the law 'friend'

*Marrik takes a pull on his cigar and slowly blows the smoke in the faces of the two drow - again, it seems to have a trace of electricity arcing through it*

((not to any effect BTW))

2006-09-02, 01:47 PM
the beholder brings over two slaadweisers with a generous tot of vodka in each. he also brings out a steaming gecko curry
heres your order gents.that'll be 5 gold pieces....
he notices the brewing tension between marrik and the drow
lets keep things civil shall we?

2006-09-02, 01:47 PM
Interesting. Stay out of our way scaled one. We are here on buissness

Will this cover it? (hands Beholder small gem)

2006-09-02, 01:50 PM
What business would that be, that it lets you avoid the law...'friend'?

2006-09-02, 01:52 PM
More than enough..
eventually the beholder's conscience wins, and he places 3 gold coins on the table
I added a generous tip. but please people, we are all sentient here. no need to bring skin colour/texture into this.can we do this without violence?

2006-09-02, 01:53 PM
This (hands Document)

These Drow are under Lloth's protection. They have been charged by her high preist to kill the paladin known as Ekrath. Should Any Local law prohibit them from doing so Lloth will intervene.

2006-09-02, 01:56 PM
*Marrik takes the document and looks it over*

Hmmm...divine right. Well, it all looks legal to me. Just make sure you let the authorities know beforehand next time, there are places for this sort of thing in this town...'friend'...Remember, I've got my eye on you two.

*Marrik sits back down, still smoking his cigar and turns to Beholder*

Sorry about that Beholder, just a legal misunderstanding

2006-09-02, 01:56 PM
the beholder whistles through his teeth
Lloth? shes a nasty one...be careful marrik. But while i'm here, mr swarthydrow1 and mr swarthydrow2, have you ever considered that maybe al the killing is pointless? that all this interspecies warfare should just end? paladisn do horrid things, killing hundred of innocent monsters, but if we kill them, we become them. if we could use passive resistance, we could win this.
If the world asked for world peace instead of a +4 vorpal greatsword, we could have world peace

2006-09-02, 01:57 PM
As we have ours on you

((Beholder can use my NPC's for now. I gotta go. Bri'el posts in red and Scath in Green))

You don't get it. Ekrath is a DROW paladin

2006-09-02, 02:00 PM
( I g2g too)
beholder smiles emphatically
See! give peace a chance! i'm so proud of you three! this is the first time i havent seen a kobold attempt to eat a drow, or a drow sacrifice him to lloth, drinks on the house! hell i can afford it with that gem! after that i gotta sleep though, suns rising. talk to mr samedi. i'll save you guys a seat here, antime you want!

2006-09-02, 02:00 PM
*Marrik looks over at the pair*

Just keep it legal lads, shall we?

*Looks back at Beholder*

Yeah, well, you gotta take risks in this job. No point in taking a back seat...that's the way to corruption in the Force. Ah.. thanks for the drink, but like I say, I don't drink...I'd better be going. See you around Beholder.

*Marrik waves goodbye as he leaves*

2006-09-02, 06:07 PM
Drow-eating kobold? We'd best be going as well

2006-09-02, 07:35 PM
*Marrik strolls in, grabs a couple of cigars from the bar, leaving some gold in it's place and takes up residence in one of the armchairs. He casually smokes a cigar, filling his immediate area with thick smoke that crackles with electricity, before wriggling himself comfortable in the chair. Before long, he has ceased all movement, with a thoughful expression on his immobile face, resembling the statue that many mistake him for*


2006-09-02, 09:36 PM
Yarram wakes up, turns around and kicks his associate.
Wake up Narcille, we have customers.
Wha.. Bwahdahba.. Oh yes.
Hello Marrik
I think he's asleep..
Lets go somewhere else then.
Yarram and Narcille leave the tavern.
Some time later Yarram and Narcille reenter the tavern and start cleaning up the tavern.
Yarram makes a note of polishing the unconscious statue.

2006-09-03, 07:46 AM
*Marrik rouses from his reverie and notices that the place has been cleaned up a bit and that he's been given a brief polish. He smiles, lights up a cigar and casually fills his immediate area with smoke, waiting to see if anyone will turn up*

2006-09-03, 07:49 AM

*The teenage version of Gezina walks in, her ears seem strange though and she's talking to the air*

2006-09-03, 07:59 AM
((does she have her badge on? sorry, I've not been following your story over the past couple of days))

*Marrik looks over at the door to see Gezina talking to what appears to be thin air. He leans around his seat to talk to her*

Greetings young one

2006-09-03, 08:01 AM
((Nope, doesn't even know she's a copper))


Hi mister, how are you doing?

2006-09-03, 08:07 AM
*takes a puff of his cigar*

I'm doing very well thank you. What about yourself? You seemed to be worrying about something when you came in.

2006-09-03, 08:08 AM

Oh nothing, just talking to my spirit companion *Gezina's ears are now pretty furry and fox like*

2006-09-03, 08:12 AM
Oh......Are your ears ok? They look a little......different.

2006-09-03, 08:14 AM

*Gezina feels her ears and shock* Those feel like foxe ears *Gezina waves with her tail which has transformed into a fox tail* And my tail, I need some help!

2006-09-03, 08:17 AM
*Marrik looks slightly puzzled by the whole affair*

Umm..sorry, I don't know anything about polymorphing spells....err you might try the Temple of Inari. I think they're all about foxes...err.

2006-09-03, 08:18 AM

of course, see ya mister *Gezina runs away*

2006-09-03, 08:23 AM
*Marrik just stares at the door for a few seconds as Gezina leaves, before taking a deep draw of his cigar, blowing the smoke out and wandering out of the Pub in pursuit of Gezina, with a look of curiosity on his face*


*Some time later, Marrik walks in smoking the same cigar and once again takes up residence in the armchair he was in before. Before long the pall of smoke has returned*

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-09-03, 02:45 PM
*Atreyu walks in with a celestial llama behind him. The celestial llama orders two drinks and they stand around a table talking.*

*Atreyu looks over and waves to Marrik* "Hi, Are you feeling better?"

2006-09-03, 02:47 PM

*A werefox girl walks in, she looks like she's in her teenage years, after a while she decides to leave*

2006-09-03, 02:52 PM
*Marrik looks out from his cloud of smoke and recognises Atreyu*

Hey. Yeah, I was having a bit of a low, but I'm good now.

*See's Gezina*

How are you feeling now? Come to terms with being a fox-thing yet?

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-09-03, 03:00 PM
"Atreyu, I brought you here because here is the site of a terrible sin that shows your soul is falling away from the path of Inari. Here is where you raised a hoof against your best friend in anger. You broke his leg and you drew his blood.

*Atreyu lowers his head in shame, hearing these words. Then he looks up, hearing Marrik speak.* "I'm glad to hear you're doing better"

(Is Marrik's badge visible?)

2006-09-03, 03:02 PM
((yep. very much so...despite the smoke))

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-09-03, 03:09 PM
*Atreyu continues to talk to the bronze figure*

"You've joined the Police force. That's great. They were hurt recently when a few of their best officers left them. I'm glad to see that things are looking up for them and for you."

*The celestial llama continues, taking on a stern tone*

"Let's see, what else is there? During the fight, you broke a table you have made no effort to replace. You purposely had Inari curse the flowers you gave Indurain. Deception of that nature is not something good llamas do. Just today, you told the lioness you could have killed her and your tone was not appropriate. You let your anger show too quickly."

*Again Atreyu lowers his head in shame.*

2006-09-03, 03:13 PM
*Marrik looks disapprovingly at the celestial Llama and turns to Atreyu*

Who is this dude, telling you what you should and shouldn't be doing?

2006-09-03, 03:15 PM

*A werefox girl walks in, avidly talking to the air*

Atreyu the Masked LLama
2006-09-03, 03:23 PM
"He's my spirit guide. He said we needed to talk. Everything he's saying is true."

"As a chaotic good creature and a servant of Inari, Atreyu is expected to live his life in a certain manner and with certain behavior. Lately he has been slipping. I don't think any one of us here want to see his alignment shift away from good, so I have come to help him."

*They both glance strangely at the were-fox talking to itself*

2006-09-03, 03:26 PM

Why are you looking at me like that?

2006-09-03, 03:28 PM
Oh....I don't go in for that whole 'Religion' thing...it's all a bit..oh, I don't know...restrictive?

*Marrik grins and picks up another cigar from the arm of his chair, lights it with a click of his claws and draws deep*

2006-09-03, 03:29 PM

Religion happens to be an important thing in life, copper!