PDA

View Full Version : Deth Muncher's Campaign Journal: Plane Trippin'



Deth Muncher
2010-12-03, 01:12 AM
So at long last, my campaign has started, and it's going well. For those of you interested, the discussion of the evil folk for this campaign is and will remain here (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=174563).
The basics of this campaign are that the group of PCs have been slapped together through an encounter with an evil sorceror known to them only as The Gentleman (more on that later, and more on him in the linked thread). The party, currently level 3, consists of the following (I'll update the names when I have the sheets on-hand):

-Female Gnome Beguiler, Emberlynn
-Male Human Dread Necromancer, Jacques Le Clap
-Male Human Samurai (a homebrewed fix, tweaked from one on these very forums), Ashiitaka
-Male Elven Druid, Damien
-Male Elven Druid, except he's that crazy green dragon-elf thing from Dragon Magic (I'll look that up later and post the real name), Eron

Personality quirks of note:
-Emberlynn is a former prostitute, who had fled from her pimp after realizing that the pimp had stopped his primary business and was now selling the ladies as food to demons. She is also, basically, Gambit, as she's got fancy card-chucking gloves.
-Jacques doubles as a traveling medicine show performer, peddling potions which are basically worthless but still make you feel good.
-Ashiitaka has actually roleplayed a bit more than the rest, and...well, you'll find out more about him in the first story.
-Damien is a fail-druid.
-Eron is a hipster. This came about as I realized today that Druids are, essentially, hipsters. In return for his bonus feat, any consumable items he has have to be purchased at 1.5x the price, and he is not allowed to take any from other party members, since they often buy the mainstream brands of magical items.

So now, the prologue...

CHAPTER 0.1: OR HOW A MONASTERY GOT BURNED TO THE GROUND

So, the story begins with the (as of yet nameless, since he fails at naming people) Samurai being sent on an errand by his master to obtain a scroll which grants immortality for their ruler. After a day's travel, he reaches a largeish town, with the monastery in which the scroll is housed. He enters the temple, and the monks bow to him - he is, of course, a samurai, and is to be treated with respect. After stating his business, they take him downstairs, through a winding maze of doors, until he finally comes upon the storage room. He walks in, and the wizened old monk who guards the room gets up and regards him. The walls of this room, which is large and seems to be carved out of the rockface underground, are lined with scrolls. The Samurai approaches, respectfully regards the monk, and informs him of his business. The monk, however, declines to give him the scrolls of immortality. "You see, these scrolls have been stored here ever since they were first retrieved. The scrolls you see lining the room are the history of how these particular scrolls came to be: an evil sorceror once crafted these, and used the power to gain immortality - but at a cost. He became a terrible undead creature, and those who went against him fell almost instantly. It was not until he was finally overwhelmed and destroyed that the scrolls were taken and stored here -" At this point, the monk points to a large, metal chest, not unlike the Ark of the Covenant from Indiana Jones, covered in seals. At the same time, the Samurai and monk both see what appear to be shadow ninjas appear, who also point at the chest. The Samurai and monk both see that they are outnumbered - the monk runs to the chest, and tells the Samurai - "GO." As he runs from the room, a blinding flash erupts behind him. After it subsides, he returns - and finds the monk dying next to the chest. The seals are gone. With his dying breath, the monk looks at the Samurai, and tells him it is now his duty to ensure that the scroll not fall into evil hands.

Cue the BBEG. I'm going to abbreviate this for dialog purposes.
BBEG: Yeah, you should probably keep that away from any bad guys who show up trying to take it. -to PC: The man you see before you is quite obviously not from around these parts. While you and everything else here is pseudo-asian, he is dressed like a classy British noble of the 1700s.-
Ashiitaka: I probably shouldn't trust him, right?
DM: Pretty much. He keeps walking towards you - or rather, towards the ritual. You notice now that the wards on the box are gone.
A: Well, I know why he's here.
BBEG: Right, so anyway, I'm just gonna need to slip past you and get that ritual and I'll be on my way.
A: I'm sorry pal, I can't let you do that. :smallamused:
BBEG: Sigh. *casts Forcewave, knocks Ashiitaka out of the way* Right, so I'll just be taking this then. *lifts the lid to the box, grabs a bag containing the scrolls for the ritual*
A: Wait! I challenge you to a duel!
BBEG: -shrugs- Okay.
-They commence an Iajutsu duel, the samurai with his katana and the BBEG with his Gnomish Quickrazor. Samurai gets a 24, and as such qualified to learn the character's level. I tell him 20. He responded with an expletive.-
A: Okay, well...-rolls to hit and damage- He takes 23 damage.
DM: Cool. -rolls as well- You take 4.
A: Well, now I'm on the other side of him, blocking the door.
BBEG: Look man. I really don't want to have to kill you. I've killed enough people this month - I don't want to skew next month's figures. I've got standards to uphold, and that'd throw everything out of whack. And plus, you really don't know what you're getting yourself into. So just move out of the way, and you and everyone you love can get back to your pathetic rice-farming lives.
A: I'm not moving.
BBEG: Sigh. *zaps the PC with a Reach Spell'd Vampiric Touch, which drops him to 1 health* Anyway, so I'm gonna go now. *pulls out a bag and drops it on his way out*
DM: The bag is covered in this silvery goo which seems to be evaporating. As it evaporates, the bag opens, revealing a bunch of red, glass beads.
BBEG: By the way, those are Delayed Blast Fireballs. You have five rounds to get out. Bye! -'ports away-

Ashiitaka makes it out, complete with an action movie explosion sequence - he gets flung into the air, hits the ground and is Staggered. Thankfully, enough people around town know he's a samurai that they're willing to help him out and tend to him. It takes about two weeks for him to be in good condition again (since anyone with magical healing died from Surprise Fireball Rape).

DM: You awaken to see a bottle of sake and a cup waiting for you. There's a note balanced on the cup which reads: "By the way, now that you're better, don't even think about coming after me. PS- Enjoy the sake!"

End of Chapter 0.1

Starbuck_II
2010-12-03, 09:25 AM
I liked the explosive ending.

I like how you used Quissence to keep the delayed fireballs from exploding till the end.

Deth Muncher
2010-12-03, 11:12 AM
I liked the explosive ending.

I like how you used Quissence to keep the delayed fireballs from exploding till the end.

I like that you knew exactly what it was that did it.

EDIT: Also, Chapter 0.2 will be up as soon as I have a free hour. Which means currently, 0.2 and 1 need to be written.

Deth Muncher
2010-12-07, 02:49 PM
Chapter 0.2 - MOAR PROLOGUERY

Chapter 0.2 picks up right after Ashiitaka gets up from his several week recuperation.

Since he had failed in his quest, he returned back to his village empty handed. His elder told him, point blank, "You are not to return until you possess the secrets of immortality." Does that sound like a quest to you? I think so.

So after gathering his belongings and hopping on his horse, he tried to figure out what the towns were in the immediate vicinity. The two towns nearest to him were the region's capital, which is a fairly bustling but very rigidly policed city, or the nearby port, which is the major trade hub of the region. He chose the port.

Upon reaching Nuport (the name of aforementioned port), he did what any adventurer does: finds the local inn. After stashing his stuff and stabling his horse, he did the second thing any adventurer does when they hit town - they look for work. After examining the city, which is split up between the port/trade district and the housing district, he managed to find the headquarters of the local mercenary guild - the Crimson Caravan. As he find when he inquires within, they did need some low level grunt work - one of the caravans they had been hired to protect had gone missing, and so they needed to recover it. They gave Ashiitaka a rough map of where they assumed it to be, and he set off on his merry way.

The cart, based on average travel times and communications, was presumed to be about a mile outside of the city. What Ashiitaka aw when he got there, however, was no cart - or rather, it was formerly a cart. The caravan had been ransacked, and only a few boxes remained. As he closed upon the cart, he felt a spear poke into his back. He turned around and saw - as he figured - goblins. He saw three goblins behind him - and when he turned around, he saw what he presumed to be their leader - a strange, blue goblin. As Ashiitaka can speak Goblin, he tried to reason with them:
A:Goblins, I need you to return these goods and let me take them.
Blue: No, sorry, that's not going to happen.
A: The hard way, then. -Draws his sword-

At this point, Ashiiaka feels a strange pain in his head - though it quickly faded. Blue looked rather confused at the failure of his attack. Ashiitaka struck out, and nearly cleft him in twain. The goblins, seeing they were clearly outmatched, picked up Blue and started running away. Ashiitaka drew his bow, and nicely head-shotted one of the goblins carrying Blue, who as a result thudded wetly to the ground. The other goblin picked him up, and they ran away. Ashiitaka lost sight of them.

Evaluating the situation, he figured he could probably rig up a new wheel for the cart with an untrained Craft:Woodworking check, which he passes. He hooks it up to his horse, and sets off back to town. Once he got back to the Crimson Caravan, he told them what happened. Crim, the leader, responds: "Goblins, you say? Damn dirty things. Here's your pay for now, but we'll need you to go get the rest of the supplies from the goblin lair." Ashiitaka rested up for the night, preparing for the next day.

Next day rolls around, he suits up, and rocks out. After about an hour of searching, he finds a cleverly disguised cave entrance. He figures he's probably in the right place. Ashiitaka dismounts, leaving his horse and cart outside, and sets into the cave. What will happen? Will he defeat the goblins and reclaim the crates? Will he be destroyed by goblins? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON DRAGONBALL Z DETH MUNCHER'S CAMPAIGN JOURNAL.

Deth Muncher
2010-12-26, 03:04 PM
Chapter 0.3 - THE CONCLUSION TO THE PROLONGED PROLOGUE

(I'm trying to break this up a bit more, so that you guys don't die from my Wall of Text attacks.)

So, after his daring retrieval of the lost goods, Ashiitaka had returned to tell his tale of what happened. The response of the Crimson Caravan? "Well, get back out there and see if they've got the rest of the stuff then!" The Caravan assigned two dwarven bodyguards to come with him as backup.

Ashiitaka and his bodyguards rode back to where he had picked up the cart earlier, and sent out in search of the goblin lair. Given that none of them were rangers, they had a rather difficult time in locating the place, but after a long bit of searching, they finally found their way into a cleverly hidden cave.

After several minutes of descent, the dwarves realized that this cave was clearly not natural, and that it was also not all that well dug out. It was at this point the tunnel leveled out, and split off in two directions. The one to the right, as Ashiitaka and his dwarf pals found out, contained all this missing loots. The left one, however...

DM: As you walk through the opening at the end of tunnel, you come across some very confused goblins, all of whom immediately grab their weapons (no, none of them are within smacking distance of you). You see, in the center of the room, an orc, who appears to be wearing what passes for ceremonial garb in the goblonoid/orkoid world. His eyes glow just ever so slightly blue. Next to him, you see your best friend, the blue goblin.
A: (ooc) Okay, I'll speak in Goblin to them. (ic) Goblins, I have come to reclaim the goods which you have stolen. Return them at once and no harm will come to you.
Orc Chieftain: No, puny human!
Blue: I'm sorry, you're going to have to leave.
A: That won't happen.
DM: It is at this point that you realize that the goblins have been edging closer and closer to you, and you figure that even if you try to run, they're still within javelin range of you.
Dwarf 1: So we're gonna beat them down, right?
Dwarf 2: Seems so.
Dwarf 1: I had really hoped we wouldn't have to fight these smelly buggers.
A: Okay, I'll draw my sword. CHARGE!

At this point, the room is divided so that at the doorway is Ashiitaka and the dwarves, and then three goblins on either side, with Blue and the Chief at the back of the room, and two goblins in the middle of the room, directly in front of Ashiitaka. The dwarves did as best they could against the goblins, but one of them ended up falling after killing two gobbos. Ashiitaka ended up killing five gobbos, with the rest falling on the other dwarf, who ended up whipping out a CLW wand, healing himself and Ashiitaka back to full, though he made sure to tell him that there was a healing charge from the Caravan, and it would be deducted from his pay.

The Chief gets up and charges Ashiitaka. After a few misses on both sides, Ashiitaka challenges the Chief to a duel. Cue dramatic music (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F24MduxstuE). The Iajutsu Duel falls to Ashiitaka's favor, and the Chieftan, in his death throes, throws his sword. Which, unfortunately, hits one of the support beams, triggering a cave in in the cave exit.

And then there were three.

Blue looked at both the dwarf and Ashiitaka. "Well, go on, get mining."
Ashiitaka: What? Mining?
Dwarf: Well, 'es got a point. We DO need to get out of here.
A: Why aren't you helping?
B: Does it look like I can help?

And so, the dwarf and Ashiitaka were convinced to mine their way out of the goblin lair. Several hours later, once the tunnel was clear...

A: Alright, we're taking the crates with us.
B: No, you don't want to do that. *attempts a charm*
A: *resists charm* Nnno, that's exactly what we're doing.
B: Damn!

So the dwarf and Ashiitaka loaded the dead dwarf's body and all the crates onto the cart up top and start heading out. All was well, until...

DM: A spear whizzes by your head.
Ashiitaka: What? *spot check* There's goblins following us trying to get back the crates! Go faster!
At this point, he leaves the cart to be driven by the dwarf, pulls out his bow and starts sniping the goblins chucking spears at them. He gets a few of them, and the rest scatter.

Ashiitaka and the dwarf return to the Crimson Caravan, give their report, and deliver the goods. He was given his reward, less the healing surcharge incurred.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm so sorry that took so long to get up here. Next one should be up in the next few days - and you'll get to meet the rest of the party!

Elfin
2010-12-26, 09:20 PM
Ooh, I like it. Quite entertaining; I'll be reading eagerly.

Deth Muncher
2011-01-01, 10:56 PM
CHAPTER 1: WHAT ON OERTH IS THAT SMELL?

Note: As soon as I see my players again, I'll ask for character names so we can refer to them as something other than their class.


So all was well in the city of Nuport. Ashiitaka had just retrieved trade goods from a goblin lair, and everyone was feeling pretty good about themselves - especially since it was the weekend, which meant that the huge market in the middle of town was going on in full swing. Eron, the good druid (by which, I mean the competent druid, not the FailDruid) was peddling obscure, homegrown herbs, which conveniently attracted the attention of Damien, and a convenient meeting happened. Conveniently. Jacques Le Clap, the Dread Necromancer also happened to be peddling his wares - except instead of obscure herbs, he was peddling cures for everything from Mummy Rot to toothaches. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/SnakeOilSalesman) (Yes, he did have a top hat and enclosed saleswagon.) Emberlynn, the gnome, was doing what she did best - cheating people out of money at cards. Ashiitaka, understandably, was not participating, since he'd been doing this for a while, and the other characters needed to develop, though he did go downstairs to the same bar in which the gnome was cheating suckers.

So all was relatively calm until the PCs heard screams, and the PCs in the market (at this point, just the druids - the Necro had headed off to the inn to play cards with the gnome) smelled an absolutely horrible smell coming from the direction of the city gate. A few successful Spot checks got the Druids to see two of these walking towards them, though they didn't know what they were yet. http://www.wizards.com/dnd/images/MM35_gallery/MM35_PG204.jpg
The smelly, betentacled behemoths appeared to be coming from the city gate and charging straight for the market, grabbing random passersby and eating them. Team Druid both cast Entangle, stopping the monsters in their tracks. By this point, the screams of the peasants had reached the inn where the rest of the PCs were, and they started dashing out to TCB. Strangely, the gnome moved the fastest, thanks to a well-used Expeditious Retreat, beating the others by two rounds. However, there was still two rounds of action to be had by Team Druid before help arrived. On the first turn, CompetentDruid made a knowledge check to identify the monsters as Otyughs, and took a pot-shot at one. FailDruid asked the party, out of character, what to do.

D: Guys! I don't have any ranged weapons or spells! What am I supposed to do here?
Eron: Do you have ANY attack spells?
D: Er...Flame Blade?
Eron: Sigh.
DM: Do you even know your spell list?
FD: Uh...
Em: You know about how you can lose any spell you can cast to spontaneously cast Summon Nature's Ally, right?
D: WHAT?
Em: -explains Druid class feature-
D: Sweet! What animals can you summon?
DM: Uh...let me check. -checks- Uh...Dire Rat, Eagle, Monkey, Octopus...
D: OCTOPUS?! GREAT IDEA.
-group facepalm-
Em: You know they're useless out of the water, right?
D: Wait, it's not some crazy monstrous octopus?
DM: No. It's a regular octopus.
D: Oh. Well in that case...
DM: Nope. You picked the octopus. You're summoning an octopus.
D: Aw man!
DM: Your own fault.

Back in game: As you cast the spell, you hear a fain whirring sound. You look to the ocean, and see a small shape whizzing towards you. As it gets closer, you can tell it's an octopus, spinning like a propeller. It lands at your feet with a splut. It looks a little dizzy.
D: Yay octopus! What can it do?
DM: -shows the SRD page for the octopus-
D: Yay!
Eron: My turn? Okay. I'm going Mario on this otyugh. I cast Produce Flame and chuck a fireball at the thing.
DM: Okay. It looks slightly crispier, and smells even worse.
D: Is it my turn?
DM: Sigh.
D: Okay. I throw the octopus at the otyugh!
DM: -facepalm- You pick the octopus up and hurl it. Like before, it expands out like a propeller and closes the distance between you. (Note: They were, purposely, about 80ft away.) -rolls grapple- The octopus successfully grapples the otyugh's mouth shut.
Party: Yay!
DM: It also inks in the otyugh's face.
Party: Yay!
DM: Okay, Emberlynn, you get here right after that. There's still the one otyugh that's entirely untouched but entangled, and then there's the other otyugh which has two druids fighting it.
Em: Okay. I'll whip out my crossbow and start firing at the unhurt one.
Eron: I'll chuck another fireball.
DM: Okay. Oh, and by the way, Damien. -rolls- The otyugh just grabbed the octopus off of its face and ate it.
D: NOOOOOO. Is there anything around that I can throw at it?
DM: Er...well, you're in the market area. The only thing nearby that looks throwable is some cabbage.
D: That's it, I'm chucking cabbages. -rolls-
Everyone: -sigh-
D: It's a 20!
Everyone: -facepalm-
DM: You deal it one point of damage as it hits the creature's uvula, after which the otyugh closes its mouth and eats the cabbage.
D: I got plenty of cabbages up in this bitch! Let's do it!

The other party members showed up then, and charged the otyugh, killing it. Which left the other one...

Eron: Hey, Damien. What's your animal companion? Can it go attack the other one?
D: It's a hawk. I know! I can make my familiar cast spells, right? I'll cast Flame Blade on it so it can go attack!
Em: Actually...it doesn't work like that. Though you could cast it on yourself and have it apply to the hawk as long as you're within ten feet of one another.
DM: Wait, you're saying he can run up and attack the otyugh with a flaming bird?
Everyone: FALCON....PAWNCH! (You'd be amazed how hard it is to talk in red text in real life.)
D: I do that.
And thus, the otyugh was defeated by awesome. (Although they did actually have to fight it for a few rounds, since by this point we remembered that Entangle actually wrapped the things in vines, which burnt away when fire was applied.)

As the party brushed themselves off, congratulated each other and got acquainted, there was a quiet -bamf-, and...
DM: In front of you, there appears to be a very well dressed gentleman, and a horrible ice insect sporting a large frosty moustache and a pith helmet. Ashiitaka, you recognize the man.
A: Oh damn it.
Party: Huh?
A: He's bad news.
Gentleman: Hi guys! Good job there! I'm really impressed!
Party: -blank stares-
G: Y'know, with killing the otyughs? Wasn't that fun?
Gnome: Uh...innocent people died. It wasn't really that fun.
G: Oh yes it was. Did you see how that one just popped a peasant in its mouth like a candy?
Gnome: Yeah...that's...kinda not good.
G: Of course not. But you have to admit, that was hilarious when it ate the octopus.
Gnome: ...okay, yeah, that was pretty funny.
G: See! Anyway, you've passed the test.
Eron: Test?
G: Well yeah. I wanted to make sure you guys were proper adventurers, so I summoned a bunch of otyughs, and you made pretty short work of these.
Le Clap: Wait, are there more of these things?
G: Oh, of course! They're all out in the countryside. This is what me and the Colonel here do for fun - once every couple of years, we summon a bunch of monsters and go kill them.
Em: And you don't care that innocent bystanders get caught in the middle of this?
G: -ponders for a moment- No, not really. Anyway, we're gonna go kill the rest of those. Oh, and keep whatever loot you find on them, you earned it. Bye! -teleports himself and The Colonel-

Party: -nervous stares-

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

We'll pick up next time with what happens after they loot the otyughs.

DragonOfUndeath
2011-01-01, 11:58 PM
Subscribing.
This is awesome

jguy
2011-01-02, 04:32 AM
Pure awesome sauce

Deth Muncher
2011-01-08, 04:38 PM
I've been updating the previous posts, since the party all has names now. The internet ate my last attempt at an update, so it'll be coming up pretty soon. The next update will carry us through what's already happened, and our next session won't be until mid-late month.

Lord Loss
2011-01-09, 08:06 AM
I like! Keep up the good work, I'll definitley be following this!

Deth Muncher
2011-01-14, 10:34 PM
CHAPTER 2: LOLZ, U TROLLIN'

So the party has just smacked down the Otyughs and had been congratulated by none other than The Gentleman, a man of wealth and taste. And sadism - he did unleash the Otyughs on the local populace for gits and shiggles, after all. After looting the Otyughs - Jacques found what we soon referred to as The Crystal Crunk Cup, which is a solid diamond chalice - and burning the bodies of the slaughtered townsfolk (well, those that Jacques didn't sneak back into his cart for later reanimation) as well as destroying the Otyugh corpses (which already smelled horrendous), they went back to the inn, cleaned themselves up, and went out into the city. Jacques had asked if there were any magic shops in town, and he found the standard generic magic shop. Upon a much harder Search check, however, he discovered another (http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=350.0) magic shop, well hidden and in a rather nondescript corner of town. (I'll let you go read that link right quick, and we'll get back to Jacques in a few.)
Meanwhile, the rest of the party was doing standard post-fight things - patching up their armor, seeing if they could find a deal and swap it out for new armor, Eron went back to his stall to collect his things, pretty boring standard fare.
So Jacques had uncovered Bunko's Bargain Basement. For those of you unaware until now, Bunko's is a rather indispensable guide to the things you should ALWAYS have if you're going to try to invest in magic items. Why did I put this in my campaign? Well twofold - on the one hand, it means that the players have access to good items, assuming they can FIND the Bunko's in each town they visit - I'm making his shop not unlike the shop that Rincewind visits in the Discworld series, which keeps jumping around. The second part is that means they have a familiar face, and moreso, the familiar face of a high level mage who might be willing to enchant things for them if they get on his good side and pay him enough. So, once in Bunko's, Jacques inquires if he might be able to get a whip made from an otyugh tentacle he yoinked. Now, I remember there being such an item somewhere, but I don't recall where - if any of you readers know where I can find it, that'd be dandy if you'd tell me. At the time, though, I couldn't find it, but Bunko offered to buy it off of him for a fair price (between 500 and 750GP, I think). Jacques took him up on the offer, then quickly ran off to find the rest of the party to tell them about this awesome store.
After finishing up at the normal magic shop, the party walks out and bumps into - you guessed it - The Gentleman.
G: Oh hey guys! So, I finish flaming the countryside to get rid of the otyughs.
Party: Uh huh...
G: Which means now, you guys get to go trolling!
Party: What?
G: Yeah. I summoned a bunch of trolls. You'd better go take care of them before they start digging into the countryside and making themselves at home.
Em: Uh, we are NOT equipped to deal with trolls.
G: Sure you are. That's what you low-level adventuring types do, right? Kill trolls?
Em: WE'RE LEVEL 3.
G: Yeah, so?
Em: A single troll would rape us!
G: Bah.
The rest of the party is getting rather worried at this point.
Eron: Uh, how many trolls are there out there?
G: I dunno, lots? But, not my problem. You kids have fun now! -starts to Teleport-
Em: Wait!
G: Yes?
Em: You SERIOUSLY expect us to take down an entire horde of trolls? By ourselves?
G: I mean, you guys mopped up those otyughs pretty well...but look. If you're going to keep whining about this, then I guess I'll let you in on a little secret. There's a ruin a little ways away from here in the remains of Oldport that I never really got around to looting. You guys should go poke around in there and see if you can't find something worthwhile.
Em: Oh...kay...won't the trolls see us?
G: Not if you get there quick. Bye! -Teleports-
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

There's one more update left before I run out of material to update with, but we should be having our first session of the year this coming Thursday, so there'll be more to come!

absolmorph
2011-01-14, 10:39 PM
The Gentleman summoned 40 trolls in an undefended countryside! That's almost as many as four 10s.
And that's terrible!

The-Mage-King
2011-01-14, 10:42 PM
Words fail to describe the awesome.

Subscribed.

Deth Muncher
2011-01-15, 12:33 AM
Subscribing.
This is awesome


Pure awesome sauce


I like! Keep up the good work, I'll definitley be following this!


Words fail to describe the awesome.

Subscribed.

You people flatter me. It's not like I'm SilverClawShift or anything... :P But here's hoping that this one goes all the way to the end, so that we might be able to actually have another epic saga to add to the Sticky of Important Threads.

Elfin
2011-01-15, 12:43 AM
Still very awesome.

And I really like the touch of adding Bungo's Bargain Basement as an actual store...might have to steal that idea sometime.

Deth Muncher
2011-01-18, 12:21 AM
CHAPTER 3: THE BUNKER OF WEE JAS - PART 1

So, the players just got trolled - literally. The Gentleman informed them that there were trolls in the countryside, and it was their job to wipe them out. Upon hearing their protestations to the effect of "trolls can slaughter us, we're level 3, you evil bastard," he was kind enough to point them to some ruins in Oldport. As the party had already finished resupplying (and Jacques had informed the party of Bunko's Bargain Basement) they asked a few townsfolk where Oldport was, and made a few Gather Info checks on Oldport itself. Oldport was, as one might imagine, the old port town until some sort of disaster burnt it to the ground - but it's too far back for anyone to really remember what happened or when. All the current townies know is that Nuport was built a few miles away, and it's just as prosperous as Oldport was, so who cares?

The trek to Oldport was fairly uneventful - the party was mostly going on foot, since Jacques' carriage...isn't really suited to having people riding in it at the moment. Ashiitaka did have his horse though, and was nice enough to let Emberlynn ride along. The ruins of Oldport were pretty much as you'd expect - overgrown with weeds and vines, the occasional small forest creature darting around the remains of houses and shops. Nothing of worth was left, though. Though finally, Damien happened upon a church in the middle of town. No one seemed to have enough K:Religion to figure out to whom it belonged, though - most of the symbols on the outside (and inside too - there was a big hole in the roof, so the elements had been able to get in) had been eroded by time. Upon closer examination within the church, however (a natural 20 Search check didn't hurt), the party found that the altar seemed to be on a hinge, and was actually -dingdingding- a trapdoor. Emberlynn checked it for traps, determining that it was an untrapped trap door. She started climbing down the ladder, and she ran into her first trap - which she disarmed. She climbed a little further and ran into the second trap - which she could not disarm, and zapped her for a few damage. She tried again, and it zapped her again, this time for lots of damage. She wasn't risking any more hitpoint loss, so she climbed back up and told the party. They asked what kind of damage it was, to which I responded for her, "Negative energy." Out of character, I looked at Jacques' player and said "Maybe you want to try?" He thinks and then goes "OH YEAH! Okay guys, let me sneak down there and see if I can do something about it."
Eron: You? Aren't you some kind of caster? You don't get to disarm traps.
Em: Hey, watch it.
J: Er...well, let's just go ahead and put it out there that negative energy doesn't really hurt me so much. Also, don't try to heal me. >_>
The party is confused, but lets it slide. He climbs down the ladder and, because it was hilarious, just started punching the trap to make it stop.

It was at this point that the session started to break down, because Jacques' player started going into describing what he thought negative energy damage was - namely, horrible images passing through your mind causing trauma, like imagining your overweight grandmother in a bikini. Much hilarity ensued.

Game restarted, with the passageway down to...well, whatever it was, cleared. Everyone climbed down the ladder - except Ashiitaka, who was too heavy in his armor and ended up breaking the ladder and crashing to the ground. After walking forward down the hallway for a bit and looking around (the party had, smartly, cast Light on a rock and so could actually see a bit), they came to realize that the place they were was...well, not quite right. Not in a non-euclidian, eldritch mindrapey kind of way, but there were runes and iconography all over the walls and floor as they walked. Detect Magic confirmed that the runes were, in fact, magic wards, in addition to some other high level magic they couldn't quite place. Jacques was the first to finally break the K:Religion check, and figured out that the iconography was in accordance with Wee Jas (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wee_Jas) , which made him a happy camper, and he passed it along. Eventually, the party made it into a large open area, in which there was a large altar with this set into the wall above it. http://www.traykon.com/Images/WeeJas.gif
In addition, there were three tapestries on either side of the room - on the PCs' left, they were of your standard pro-Wee Jas necromantical pictures, but on the right, the first was a map of old Oldport (that is to say, intact), the third was of Oldport after it had been ruined...and the second one in the middle was a picture of a rather dashing gentleman flying above a horde of trolls, with flames in the background. The party was rather shocked, to say the least, as the entire room was completely coated in dust, and it looked like it had been that way for a very long time. The party splits up and starts investigating. Eron asked if he could take the tapestries down, since he wanted to make clothing out of them, since they would obviously be the most obscure thing ever and thus would fit his hipster persona. I refused. However, upon closely examining the tapestry, he found a room hidden behind it. Thus, all the PCs started to do the same. Emberlynn, however, decided she'd go check the altar first - she checked for traps, and instead found a catch at the bottom of the disc (pictured above in the spoiler). It wasn't trapped, so she pressed it - which lit the disc in an angry red light, but revealed that it was, in fact, an illusion. She reached through the illusion and found and odd, bony rod, which she pocketed. Upon retrieving it, however, she saw that the blood red light was seeping down from the altar and into the runes which interlaced on the floor and walls around them. She ran to the tapestry which Jacques had just gone behind, and they both saw...two troll skeletons with black onyx set in their eye sockets. The redness hadn't quite reached the room yet when they had entered, but it slowly crept in and reached the skeletons. Emberlynn (well, mostly her player, but I let it slide since Em is a caster and should know this - really Jacques should have, but I digress) quickly realized what was happening and yanked the onyx out of one skeleton, which crumpled in a pile. The other skeleton, however, started to move as soon as the red light crept up and hit the onyx.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

One more update, and then I'm out of material until we play again, which should be Thursday. Emberlynn's player will be working, however, so the party will actually have to think for once.

Deth Muncher
2011-01-18, 01:09 PM
Oh hell, why not.

CHAPTER 4: THE BUNKER OF WEE JAS - PART 2

So Em grabbed the onyx out of one of the troll-etons, but the other...

Em: Damnit! I knew I shouldn't have started fiddling with things yet!
J: AAAH! A skeleton!
Em: ㄱ_ㄱ Aren't you a Necromancer?
J: Shut up! You don't know that in character!
Em: Oh right.
J: So, AAAAH. A SKELETON.

And then they punched it to death.

Em: But wait, if we encountered one here... (Camera pans to the main room, where ERON and DAMIEN and ASHIITAKA were poking around the other tapestries on the other side of the room. From the same side of the room as EMBERLYNN and JACQUES, enter THREE SKELETONS CLAD IN ROBES and A FLOCK OF SKELETON CHICKENS.)

A: So...the skeletons. Are they doing anything?
DM: Well, they're wandering vaguely in your direction. They don't really look all that happy, but then, they're skeletons, so they don't really look like anything other than dead.
Eron: I'm so taking their robes to patch my pants with.
DM: I hate you, but bonus points for being in character (coughcoughdirtyhipstercoughcough).

The battle wasn't really anything of note, although Emberlynn DID have some rather ingenious ideas for how to take them down. She first tried an illusion of The Gentleman, to see if they'd react to it. They didn't. She then illusioned a fence around the chickens, who happily sat within it and pecked at the stone floor. Jacques went over and rebuked the chickens to his command, and since I couldn't figure out where chicken stats were, I just kind of made it a swarm-type attack. It was really overpowered, and really hilarious. After concluding the battle, the party went back to searching around. The party quickly discovered that the other side of the room was the arms lockers - Emberlynn found one alcove with faintly glowing weapons, which she took one of (there was a quarterstaff that glowed green and red, a sword that glowed green and a mace that glowed red all hanging on the wall) and managed to convince everyone else that there was only two weapons in the room, Eron discovered a room packed with small metal jars with an odd sticky substance in them, and Emberlynn also found a room with a very large keg in it, with a stone mug sitting in it. Trying the tap revealed it to be beer, and it still tasted very fresh, despite it having been down in the bunker for who knows how long. At this point, Eron grabbed the quarterstaff from the armory room, and declared it to be his magic stick. I responded by correcting him that it is, more realistically, a disco stick. I also refused to let Eron's patron deity to be Lady Gaga, nor could he call his animal companion Alejandro.

Then there was the problem of how to get out - Ashiitaka had managed to smash the ladder on his way down, but the combined power of the druids resculpting the ladder was enough to hold it while he climbed up, and then everyone left and headed back to Nuport, loot in tow (they took all but the keg, which was too heavy, obviously. Emberlynn and Ashiitaka headed back later that night to fetch that). They went straight to Bunko to see what all they got, and as you may have already guessed if you're as good at playing the metagame as I assume you are (you ARE on a gaming forum, after all), he revealed that the weapons were enchanted with Acid and Fire enchantments (color coded, of course), and the metal jars were full of Trollbane, a substance which negates trolls (and other such creatures) ability to regenerate after taking damage. And so, they plotted.

The party came up with the idea that if they could lure the trolls to attack the city, they could have pre-dug trenches around the perimeter which they could fill with oil and set on fire, as well as dumping the jars of Trollbane into buckets, which archers set up around the city walls could dip their arrows into and snipe the oncoming trolls. Since Eron, Jacques and Emberlynn are all equipped with things that can bypass the trolls' regeneration as well, they'll likely have some other role in protecting the town - dealing with sneaky trolls, etc. We'll see how well this works after we play again (though Emberlynn's player has to work, and I have yet to hear from Jacques' player, so it may not be this week).

Ragitsu
2011-01-18, 05:26 PM
Very cool.

DragonOfUndeath
2011-01-20, 05:24 PM
Very Very Cool

Blueberrypop
2011-02-14, 05:40 PM
You really need to be updating and not being a useless lazy turd.

Deth Muncher
2011-02-17, 04:44 AM
You really need to be updating and not being a useless lazy turd.

Hey! I'll get to it when...well, when life stops sucking and I have a bit more time on my hands to write it up.

For the few of you who actually read this, this journal is three (soon to be four) sessions behind. I'll make it up to you, I swear!