So I Need a Book Quote Describing a Paladin...

[balistafreak]

So I need to launch an essay about how morality and heroism intersect with a quote. (Which I think is silly, but there's the lumps.) My roleplay-sodden mind being what it is, I immediately thought of Paladins. :smallamused:

Now, the source preferably should be from an actual published book, not an anecdotal quote from your basement, as awesome as it may be. (Sorry, AtwasAwamps. :smalltongue:) It needs to describe what it means to be "good", without digging too deep into setting mythology or specific codes. Talking about service and charity is fine, for example - talking about following the Holy Code of Pelor is not.

Thanks in advance!

[Cerlis]

Should be something good in the book "Arthas"

[Asgardian]

"What makes a hero? Courage, strength, morality, withstanding adversity? Are these the traits that truly show and create a hero? Is the light truly the source of darkness or vice versa? Is the soul a source of hope or despair? Who are these so called heroes and where do they come from? Are their origins in obscurity or in plain sight?"
— Fyodor Dostoyevsky (Notes from Underground)

[Hanuman]

http://www.gamerdna.com/gallery/data/500/Paladin_Motivational_2.jpg

http://img443.imageshack.us/img443/4962/paladind.jpg

[The Big Dice]

Goblins (http://www.goblinscomic.com/02182006/) has the answer you seek!

[Catch]

Now, the source preferably should be from an actual published book, not an anecdotal quote from your basement, as awesome as it may be.

Reading comprehension is a life skill, folks.

How about a comic book? Captain America, in Amazing Spider-Man #537:

"Doesn't matter what the press says. Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say. Doesn't matter if the whole country decides that something wrong is something right. This nation was founded on one principle above all else: the requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences. When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world -- 'No, you move.'"

I can grab something from my bookshelf if you need a more, say, accredited source.

[Aracor]

If you want to use Goblins, I think this one's more appropriate:
http://www.goblinscomic.com/12232006/

Otherwise you can always steal from the Wheel of Time.

"Death is as light as a feather; duty as heavy as a mountain."
I think that's borrowed from the Japanese, though.

[Starbuck_II]

Miko: A paladin never compromises.

Does she count?

A Person named Paladin: (from "have gun, will travel")

1)
Paladin: Lesson number one - never touch a man in desperation, in anger or in fear. A real woman, a proper female kind of woman tries to perpetuate the legend that her touch is as rare as a fine jewel. That it's given only to a very special person at a very special moment.
Lydia Moss: That doesn't make sense. It's not even practical.
Paladin: Lesson number two - forget all about logic.

2)
Paladin: I have found no book on bravery, no formula for courage. I think perhaps a man is valiant only when his fear of cowardice exceeds his fear of death.

3)
Paladin: You tried to get me killed, but I FORGIVE you!
4)
Paladin: The good die young so they may not be corrupted and the wicked live on so they may have a chance to repent.
5)
Paladin: [giving his code of law] Thou shalt not kill a man unless he's armed and facing you; thou shalt not steal a man's house; thou shalt not rob at gun point.
6)
Paladin: He who takes the wrong road, makes the journey twice


The Paladin Knight:

1)
Good Always Wins Over Evil - But Not Without Sacrifice.
2)In a higher order of Justice, there are no Punishments, only Consequences."
3)
As Great as the Potential for Good will be, the Potential for Evil will be just as Equal. Forget this not and never underestimate its powers."


Have more than thou showest, speak less than thou knowest." Shakespeare

The qualities of a great man are "vision, integrity, courage, understanding, the power of articulation, and profundity of character." DWIGHT EISENHOWER

Hmm, How about Orrin Porter Rockwell? Pretty good real life Paladin:

"Old Port Rockwell looks like man,
With a beard on his face and his hair in a braid,
But there's none in the West but Brigham who can
Look in his eyes and not be afraid.

For Port is a devil in a human shape,
Though he calls himself "Angel," say vengence is sweet;
But he's black, bitter death, and there's no escape,
When he wails through the night his dread war cry, "Wheat!" "Wheat!"
Somewhere a wife with her babes kneels to pray,
For she knows she's a widow and orphans are they."

This is what others said about him because killed so many people in fights defending himself.
Incidently, "Wheat" was an expression he used all the time, as in "That's wheat", meaning, thats good.

[The Tygre]

"But down these mean streets a man must go who is not himself mean, who is neither tarnished nor afraid." -Raymond Chandler

"You gotta be one of the good guys, Jesse. Because there's way too many of the bad." - Preacher

“Surely Satan himself must have let loose the gates of hell... for what haunts my flock is surely not the work of our Lord. People are scared. They feel God has abandoned us. The Earth becomes the devil’s playground, and people begin to lose faith in the Lord. 'Where is he,' they ask. 'Why does he not answer our prayers?' People need miracles. They need to see that God is with us always. Even when it seems He is not. They need to see His love... and he certainly has his hands full. I am His shepherd, and so He has called upon me to deliver.”

"It is the mission of each true knight, his duty, nay, his privilege.

To dream the impossible dream,
To fight the unbeatable foe,
To bear with unbearable sorrow,
To run where the brave dare not go,

To right the unrightable wrong,
To love pure and chaste from afar,
To reach, though your arms are too weary,
For that far, unreachable star!

This is my quest,
To follow that star!
No matter how hopeless,
No matter how far!

To fight for the right
Without question or pause!
To be willing to march into Hell
For a Heavenly cause!

And I know if I'll only stay true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lay peaceful and calm
When they lay me to rest.

And the world, shall be better for this,
That one man, scorned and covered in scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star!"
- The Impossible Dream (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGzqbEeVWhs), Man of La Mancha

[Dexam]

"Never violate a woman, nor harm a child. Do not lie, cheat or steal. These things are for lesser men. Protect the weak against the evil strong. And never allow thoughts of gain to lead you into the pursuit of evil. Never back away from an enemy. Either fight or surrender. It is not enough to say I will not be evil. Evil must be fought wherever it is found."
-- The Iron Code of Druss
from the novel Legend, by David Gemmell

[Hanuman]

Reading comprehension is a life skill, folks.
As gamers we don't need lives, we have 3.

[Psyx]

Mallory's 'Mort D'Arthur' probably has some excellent ones in, but none that spring to mind. Certainly worth a look, though.

[Yora]

"Never violate a woman, nor harm a child. Do not lie, cheat or steal. These things are for lesser men. Protect the weak against the evil strong. And never allow thoughts of gain to lead you into the pursuit of evil. Never back away from an enemy. Either fight or surrender. It is not enough to say I will not be evil. Evil must be fought wherever it is found."
-- The Iron Code of Druss
from the novel Legend, by David Gemmell
- Obey orders in all your actions.
- Do not take a single needle or piece of thread from the masses.
- Turn in everything captured.
- Speak politely.
- Pay fairly for what you buy.
- Return everything you borrow.
- Pay for anything you damage.
- Do not hit or swear at people.
- Do not damage crops.
- Do not take liberties with women.
- Do not ill-treat captives.
- - Mao Zedong

[Psyx]

^ Extra points for massive irony!

[Telonius]

"I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend." - Tolkien (Faramir speaking), "The Two Towers."

"Nurture your minds with great thoughts. To believe in the heroic makes heroes." - Disraeli

"The greatest obstacle to being heroic is the doubt whether one may not be going to prove one's self a fool; the truest heroism is to resist the doubt; and the profoundest wisdom, to know when it ought to be resisted, and when it be obeyed." - Nathaniel Hawthorne, "The Blithedale Romance"

(If Aristotle weren't so wordy, the discussion of cowardice, foolhardiness, and courage in "Nicomachean Ethics" would be good.)

"When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness." - Joseph Campbell, "The Power of Myth," interviewed by Bill Moyer.

[Person_Man]

I see from your profile that you're in Blacksburg, and thus most likely at Virginia Tech or Radford. But it's sounds like the type of topic a graduate student would think up for a ENGL 101 discussion section, so I'm guessing you're a freshman. Is that right?

As such, I suggest you discuss the banality of evil (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banality_of_evil) and the banality of heroism (http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_banality_of_heroism/). Morality is not a matter of grand beliefs or dramatic actions. There are no villains or heroes except for the dramatization of the media and history. The great injustices and heroic moments of history are generally not carried out by sociopaths or paladins. They are a long series of small moments in which people do their job. Morality is recognizing and choosing what your job is, and why you do it.

“The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be good or evil.” ~Hannah Arendt


By the time you get to be a senior the whole "there is no morality" and "how do we know anything" schtick gets quite hackneyed and makes people groan with annoyance. But if you're still young and you get to it "first" then you'll seem original and insightful to your peers, and you should milk that cow for all it's worth. Just don't be a douchebag about it.

[Serenity]

Well, it's from a movie rather than a book, but...

"Sometimes the things that may or may not be true are the things a man needs to believe in the most. That people are basically good; that honor, courage, and virtue mean everything; that power and money, money and power mean nothing; that good always triumphs over evil; and I want you to remember this, that love... true love never dies. You remember that, boy. You remember that. Doesn't matter if it's true or not. You see, a man should believe in those things, because those are the things worth believing in. "

--Hub, Secondhand Lions

[Dragonmuncher]

Honestly, the best example of a paladin I've seen in literature, ever, is Micheal Carpenter from the Dresden Files books. Everything he does is what a paladin should do.

Only problem is, I can't think of a quote about him!

[Yora]

As such, I suggest you discuss the banality of evil (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banality_of_evil) and the banality of heroism (http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_banality_of_heroism/).
The article in short: Playing RPGs makes us better people. :smallbiggrin:

[Talyn]

My good blade carves the casques of men,
My tough lance thrusteth sure,
My strength is as the strength of ten,
Because my heart is pure.

- from the poem "Sir Galahad," by Lord Tennyson

[Eldan]

Honestly, the best example of a paladin I've seen in literature, ever, is Micheal Carpenter from the Dresden Files books. Everything he does is what a paladin should do.

Only problem is, I can't think of a quote about him!

Let's check Wikiquotes:

"My faith protects me. My Kevlar helps. "

Sadly, it's the only good quote they have.

[Telonius]

From "The Last Unicorn," movie version, right before the quote in my signature:

"Heroes know that things must happen when it is time for them to happen. A quest may not simply be abandoned; unicorns may go unrescued for a long time, but not forever. A happy ending cannot come in the middle of the story."

[Ravens_cry]

The whole of the Paradoxical Commandments. (http://www.paradoxicalcommandments.com/)

[Jay R]

"With great power comes great responsibility."
--- Spider-Man, Amazing Fantasy #15, Stan Lee

[Jay R]

The book you want is The Book of the Courtier, written in the 16th century by Baldasar Castiglione. The whole book. It's a description of discussions held by the Duchess of Montefeltro among several courtiers and court ladies about what makes the perfect courtier. It became the standard for gentlemanly behavior throughout Europe. Here are a few excerpts:

"So deserving of praise that his very enemies were always obliged to praise him."

"We will declare in a few words that it suffices if he is, as we say, a man of honor, and integrity: for included in this are prudence, goodness, fortitude, and temperance of soul, and all the other qualities proper to such an honored name."

"I judge it to be his first duty to know how to handle every kind of weapon, both on foot and on horse, and know the advantages of each kind."

"Let him do all that others do, yet never depart from comely conduct, but behave himself with that good judgment which will not allow him to engage in any folly; let him laugh, jest, banter, frolic, and dance, yet in such a manner as to show always that he is genial and discreet; and let him be full of grace in all that he says or does."

"Just as no court, however great, can have adornment or splendor or gaiety in it without ladies, neither can any Courtier be graceful or pleasing or brave, or do any gallant deed of chivalry, unless he is moved by the society and by the love and charm of ladies: even discussion about the Courtier is always imperfect unless ladies take part in it and add their part of that grace by which they make Courtiership perfect and adorned."

"You ought to obey your lord in all things profitable or honorable to him, not in those that will bring him harm and shame. Thus, if he should command you to do some deed of treachery, not only are you not bound to do it, but you are bound not to do it—both for your own sake and in order not to minister to the shame of your lord."

"Rarely or almost never will he ask of his lord anything for himself, lest his lord, not wishing to deny it to him directly, should perchance grant it to him will ill grace, which is much worse."

"But because such a complete perfection as this is very rarely, and perhaps never, found in human nature, a man who feels himself wanting in some particular ought not to lose confidence in himself or the hope of reaching a high mark, even though he cannot attain to that perfect and highest excellence to which he aspires. For in every area there are many ranks besides the highest that are praiseworthy, and he who aims at the summit will seldom fail to mount more than half way."

[Heliomance]

"It is the mission of each true knight, his duty, nay, his privilege.

To dream the impossible dream,
To fight the unbeatable foe,
To bear with unbearable sorrow,
To run where the brave dare not go,

To right the unrightable wrong,
To love pure and chaste from afar,
To reach, though your arms are too weary,
For that far, unreachable star!

This is my quest,
To follow that star!
No matter how hopeless,
No matter how far!

To fight for the right
Without question or pause!
To be willing to march into Hell
For a Heavenly cause!

And I know if I'll only stay true
To this glorious quest
That my heart will lay peaceful and calm
When they lay me to rest.

And the world, shall be better for this,
That one man, scorned and covered in scars,
Still strove, with his last ounce of courage
To reach the unreachable star!"
- The Impossible Dream (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGzqbEeVWhs), Man of La Mancha
That is a beautiful song. I love Man of La Mancha.


Well, it's from a movie rather than a book, but...

"Sometimes the things that may or may not be true are the things a man needs to believe in the most. That people are basically good; that honor, courage, and virtue mean everything; that power and money, money and power mean nothing; that good always triumphs over evil; and I want you to remember this, that love... true love never dies. You remember that, boy. You remember that. Doesn't matter if it's true or not. You see, a man should believe in those things, because those are the things worth believing in. "

--Hub, Secondhand Lions

Bah, swordsaged.

[Grelna the Blue]

You might make a pretty fair paladin keeping the following quotes in mind:

Vaclav Havel:
...the only genuine core of all our actions–if they are to be moral–is responsibility.
Work for something because it is good, not just because it stands a chance to succeed.

Martin Luther King, Jr.:
Keep feeling the need for being first. But I want you to be the first in love. I want you to be the first in moral excellence. I want you to be the first in generosity.

Aristotle:
Moral excellence comes about as a result of habit. We become just by doing just acts, temperate by doing temperate acts, brave by doing brave acts.

Titus Maccius Plautus:
Good courage in a bad affair is half of the evil overcome.
Let deeds match words.

The Mahabharata, classical Sanskrit epic of India, 200 BC & 200 AD:
Conquer a man who never gives by gifts; Subdue untruthful men by truthfulness; Vanquish an angry man by gentleness; And overcome the evil man by goodness.

[erikun]

I don't have my copy handy to leaf through, but The Art of War by Sun Tzu is both a classic piece of literature and very quotable. It has a lot of statements on how one should fight properly and how one should rule people properly, both of which would apply to Paladinhood very well.

[AtwasAwamps]

So I need to launch an essay about how morality and heroism intersect with a quote. (Which I think is silly, but there's the lumps.) My roleplay-sodden mind being what it is, I immediately thought of Paladins. :smallamused:

Now, the source preferably should be from an actual published book, not an anecdotal quote from your basement, as awesome as it may be. (Sorry, AtwasAwamps. :smalltongue:) It needs to describe what it means to be "good", without digging too deep into setting mythology or specific codes. Talking about service and charity is fine, for example - talking about following the Holy Code of Pelor is not.

Thanks in advance!

It wasn't a basement! It was my friend's living room. Jeez.

Will check my list when I get home tonight, I have a few. Nothing I can remember accurately enough to suggest before checking the written work.

[Marillion]

From "The Last Unicorn," movie version, right before the quote in my signature:

"Heroes know that things must happen when it is time for them to happen. A quest may not simply be abandoned; unicorns may go unrescued for a long time, but not forever. A happy ending cannot come in the middle of the story."

"Great heroes need great sorrows and burdens, or half their greatness goes unnoticed."
-Schmendrick the Magician

[The Glyphstone]

Reading comprehension is a life skill, folks.

How about a comic book? Captain America, in Amazing Spider-Man #537:

"Doesn't matter what the press says. Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say. Doesn't matter if the whole country decides that something wrong is something right. This nation was founded on one principle above all else: the requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences. When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world -- 'No, you move.'"

I can grab something from my bookshelf if you need a more, say, accredited source.

Seconding ol' Cappie here. Says it all, really.

[woodenbandman]

From the song of Roland, which, I believe, is the origin of the word "paladin." The story: Pinabel is the kin of Ganelon, who betrayed Roland in the battle at Saragossa. Tierri speaks to King Charlemagne of his treachery, and Pinabel challenges him to a fight. If Pinabel wins, they let Ganelon go. If Tierri wins, Ganelon hangs. Tierri knows that Pinabel is much bigger and stronger than he is, and that he'll probably lose this fight.

Said pinabel: "Tierri, now give it up! I'll be your man, in love and loyalty, I'll give you all I own, take what you please, Only make peace with the King for Ganelon."
Tierri Replies: "I cannot hear of that, Call me traitor if I consent to that! May God do right between us two today."

Now Tierri spoke: Pinabel, you are good, the great body on you formed like a lord's; Your peers know you: all that a vassal should be, Let this battle go then, let it end here, I will make peace for you with Charlemagne. But justice will be done on Ganelon, Such justice will be done on his body, no day will pass that men do not speak of it."

Said Pinabel: "May the Lord God forbid! I will stand up for all my kin, I'll fight, no man alive will make me quit my kin, and cry defeat and beg for his mercy, I'l sooner die than be reproached for that." And they begin to beat down with their swords on these helmets beset with gems in gold, and the bright fire fly from that fight toward heaven; and no chance now that these two can be parted: it cannot end without one of them dead.

[Heliomance]

Slightly off topic, but does anyone have a source for this awesome quote?


When I first became a Paladin, I thought in terms of black and white. I see now that it's really a spectrum of greys, and that plenty of people straddle my arbitrary line between good and evil.
But you know what? Those people aren't my problem. My job is to sniff out those who live their lives far enough away from that line that I need to squint to see any light, and then kick their ass in a manner most righteous.

[Kaun]

Supposing there was justice for all, after all? For every unheeded beggar, every harsh word, every neglected duty, every slight... every choice... Because that was the point, wasn't it? You had to choose. You might be right, you might be wrong, but you had to choose, knowing that the rightness or wrongness might never be clear or even that you were deciding between two sorts of wrong, that there was no right anywhere. And always, always, you did it by yourself. You were the one there, on the edge, watching and listening. Never any tears, never any apology, never any regrets... You saved all that up in a way that could be used when needed.

Carpe Jugulum
-Terry Pratchett

[Marnath]

Slightly off topic, but does anyone have a source for this awesome quote?

Psycho used to use it as his sig. PM him, he probably knows.

[Raum]

From my favorite book about a paladin...

"Courage is not something you have, like a sum of money, more or less in a pouch -- it cannot be lost, like money spilling out. Courage is inherent in all creatures; it is the quality that keeps them alive, because they endure. It is courage... that splits the acorn and sends the rootlet down into soil to search for sustenance. You can damage the creature, yes, and it may die of it, but as long as it lives and endures, each living part has as much courage as it can hold.... the essence is the going on. A liking for excitement and danger is like a taste for walnuts or mushrooms or the color yellow. Most people have a little -- you may have noticed how small children like to scare themselves climbing tres and such -- but the gift varies in amount. It adds to the warrior's ability by masking fear. But it's not essential... even to a warrior. The going on, the enduring, is." (The Deed of Paksenarrion, Elizabeth Moon)

"Paladins show that courage is possible...We do not argue that war is better than peace; we are not so stupid as that. But it is not peace when cruelty reigns, when stronger men steal from farmers and craftworkers, when the child is enslaved or the old thrown out to starve, and when no one lifts a hand." (The Deed of Paksenarrion, Elizabeth Moon)

A tangentially related quote from the author: "...bad things happen to the human population without regard to whether they “deserved” it. What matters is not whether it’s deserved, but what the person does with it after it happens–what lessons that person chooses to take from it. I believe with Solzenitsyn that “the line between good and evil runs right down the middle of every human heart.” That we do have choices, and that our choices matter. That our choices lead to consequences, and affect more than ourselves. That mistakes can be redeemed, though not undone–the word spoken, the act committed, exist in reality. But we can change, and by changing we can mitigate the damage we’ve done and keep from doing more." From Elizabeth Moon's blog (http://www.paksworld.com/blog/?p=477).

[Cerlis]

The article in short: Playing RPGs makes us better people. :smallbiggrin:

lol, well i need to read it on my lunch break. i skimmed Banality of heroism and all i got was "Everyone is capable of great evil and great heroism", which im pretty sure i already knew. But i'm looking forward to reading it.

[PaladinChris]

Another Terry Pratchett Quote

"If you have to look along the shaft of an arrow from the wrong end, if a man has you at his mercy, then hope like hell that man is an evil man. Because the evil like power, power over people, and they want to see you in fear. They want you to know you are going to die. So they'll talk. They'll gloat.
They'll watch you squirm. They'll put off the murder like another man will put off a good cigar.
So hope like hell your captor is an evil man. A good man will kill you with hardly a word." - Terry Pratchett Men at Arms

Also, the section in Thud! where Vimes' mental guard kicks out the elemental spirit of revenge. More of how a paladin should think, I suppose.

[Crossblade]

I've heard of your troubles. I've heard you're unhappy. But I can fix that. I'm the Fix-It-Up Chappie. I've come here to help you. I have what you need. And my prices are low. And I work with great speed. And my work is one hundred per cent guaranteed!
- Sylvester McMonkey McBean, Dr. Seuss on the Loose

“I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me!”
-Dr. Seuss (Probably also good quote for a Barbarian)

[balistafreak]

I see from your profile that you're in Blacksburg, and thus most likely at Virginia Tech or Radford. But it's sounds like the type of topic a graduate student would think up for a ENGL 101 discussion section, so I'm guessing you're a freshman. Is that right?

As such, I suggest you discuss the banality of evil (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Banality_of_evil) and the banality of heroism (http://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/the_banality_of_heroism/). Morality is not a matter of grand beliefs or dramatic actions. There are no villains or heroes except for the dramatization of the media and history. The great injustices and heroic moments of history are generally not carried out by sociopaths or paladins. They are a long series of small moments in which people do their job. Morality is recognizing and choosing what your job is, and why you do it.

“The sad truth is that most evil is done by people who never make up their minds to be good or evil.” ~Hannah Arendt


By the time you get to be a senior the whole "there is no morality" and "how do we know anything" schtick gets quite hackneyed and makes people groan with annoyance. But if you're still young and you get to it "first" then you'll seem original and insightful to your peers, and you should milk that cow for all it's worth. Just don't be a douchebag about it.

Actually, I'm a high school student writing college application essays, but that just makes me younger/even "brighter" than my peers.

But thanks for the second article - I loved it. I'll be using this quote, as it applies almost directly to my own personal experience with D&D:


If we lose the ability to imagine ourselves as heroes, and to understand the meaning of true heroism, our society will be poorer for it. But if we can reconnect with these ancient ideals, and make them fresh again, we can create a connection with the hero in ourselves. It is this vital, internal conduit between the modern work-a-day world and the mythic world that can prepare an ordinary person to be an everyday hero.

[Heliomance]

On a similar note to your last quote,

Mythlogies were never intended to be only stories. Dream hard enough and you can exist within them: neither reality, nor fantasy: just one realm of infinite possibilities.

[TheBlackShadow]

For the most part, all the quotes I've seen so far have treated Paladins very positively, although, as we all know, with the Paladin's utter devotion and committment to all that is right and good and true and whatnot comes the risk of running with zealotry, fundamentalism, and moral/ethical blindness. Of course, not all Paladins are Mikos, but I felt the need to add these two in anyway.

"There is perhaps no phenomenon which contains so much destructive feeling as moral indignation, which permits envy or hatred to be acted out under the guise of virtue" - Erich Fromm

"Take it from me, there's nothing more terrible than someone out to do the world a favour" - Terry Pratchett

[Slipperychicken]

I've heard of your troubles. I've heard you're unhappy. But I can fix that. I'm the Fix-It-Up Chappie. I've come here to help you. I have what you need. And my prices are low. And I work with great speed. And my work is one hundred per cent guaranteed!
- Sylvester McMonkey McBean, Dr. Seuss on the Loose


You sir, have just given me the best opening line for a late-entry bard/diplomancer ever.