Worst Fictional Name You Have Ever Heard

[Dr.Epic]

So while browsing Wikipedia and clicking whatever link I discovered one of the stupidest fictional names ever. One so bad that it caused me pain. Now keep in mind that the character is part of a work of fantasy so I can except usual/stupid names. Just keep that in mind. Also, it's a character in Harry Potter so again, stupid names and I shouldn't be surprised, but...

Xenophilius Lovegood

:smallannoyed:

My Greek/Latin roots are great, but xeno/xenu (which ever it is) basically means "other people" or "race of other people" (I'm close enough to the actual definition) and phil means "love". So we have a character whose name basically means Mr. I'm-a-good-guy-and-am-innocent-and-love-everyone-rainbows. This is one of the laziest names for any good character (or red herring considering this is a J.K. Rowling book). And I thought Victor von Doom's name was too obvious. At least only one of his names signifies his alignment.

[Valameer]

In I, Strahd: The War Against Azalin (http://www.amazon.com/I-Strahd-War-Against-Azalin/dp/0786907541) there is a character named 'Tew Yssup'.

Apparently placed in there because the writer was upset with her publisher.

But... yeah. That's the worst name I can think of from a 'canon' source.

[Mewtarthio]

My Greek/Latin roots are great, but xeno/xenu (which ever it is) basically means "other people" or "race of other people" (I'm close enough to the actual definition) and phil means "love". So we have a character whose name basically means Mr. I'm-a-good-guy-and-am-innocent-and-love-everyone-rainbows. This is one of the laziest names for any good character (or red herring considering this is a J.K. Rowling book). And I thought Victor von Doom's name was too obvious. At least only one of his names signifies his alignment.

"Xeno" could be translated more accurately to "strange" or "alien," though. Hence, the xenomorphs. Xenophilius is a lover of the weird. In the book, he's an eccentric conspiracy theorist, and not the kind who happens to know The Truth. He's also a pretty minor character.

[DomaDoma]

Blues-harp Babysplit of Death Note: Another Note. It's particularly bad because you're in the middle of this Ramping Up For The Big Confrontation Now scene, you're getting really tense, and then... Blues-harp Babysplit. I mean, Tsugumi Ohba doesn't exactly have his head around English names (Quillsh?), but at least he can tell them apart from a vomiting dictionary.

[Dr.Epic]

"Xeno" could be translated more accurately to "strange" or "alien," though. Hence, the xenomorphs. Xenophilius is a lover of the weird. In the book, he's an eccentric conspiracy theorist, and not the kind who happens to know The Truth. He's also a pretty minor character.

That's hardly an excuse. Even for a minor character, someone with a word that means "love" in one name and the last name "Lovegood" is pretty dumb. In fact, both his names have "love" in them. A little redundant, really.

[Friv]

There was a published White Wolf adventure in which the characters had to travel to the small town of Wangler's Knob, currently being dominated by Sesus Lahore.

*sigh*

[The Big Dice]

Are any of these names really worse than Cordio Muffinhead?

[Haruki-kun]

Xenophilius Lovegood

:smallannoyed:

.......This is one of the laziest names for any good character (or red herring considering this is a J.K. Rowling book).

How is THAT lazy? Rowling probably knew the meaning of the name when she named him.

[Sipex]

For me? Most of the fantasy style names from Eragon.

[John Cribati]

That's hardly an excuse. Even for a minor character, someone with a word that means "love" in one name and the last name "Lovegood" is pretty dumb. In fact, both his names have "love" in them. A little redundant, really.

Remus Lupin is a werewolf. Sirius Black can transform into a black dog. Xenophilius Lovegood is not a bad name at all; It actually fits perfectly to his character.

[Valameer]

Many of the Darth ___ names from Star Wars border on the ridiculous as well (Darth Vader notwithstanding).

They just take some omnominous sounding word and hammer it into place. Darth Sidious, Darth Bane, Darth Maul, Darth Plagueis.

Wouldn't be surprised to find a Darth Anger, Darth Goth, Darth Vile, Darth Khan (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRnSnfiUI54), or Darth Binks somewhere out in the EU.

[Sipex]

I foresee a Darth Famine, Darth War, Darth Pestilence and Darth Death.

[Attilargh]

Jacuzzi Splot (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baccano!).

[hamishspence]

I foresee a Darth Famine, Darth War, Darth Pestilence and Darth Death.

Darth Ruin.

And some of the Legacy era ones are a bit lacking in imagination.

[Revlid]

Many of the Darth ___ names from Star Wars border on the ridiculous as well (Darth Vader notwithstanding).

They just take some omnominous sounding word and hammer it into place. Darth Sidious, Darth Bane, Darth Maul, Darth Plagueis.
Darth Vader and Darth Sidious were fine.
But what about Darth Fection? Or Darth Truder? Or Darth Ception? Darth Duce? Darth Tegrate? Darth Centive? Darth Ane? Darth Cessant? Darth Nocence?

What happened to the THEME?!?

[Prime32]

Ragna the Bloodedge. Say whatever you want about BlazBlue, that name is ridiculous. :smalltongue:

[Admiral Squish]

Seriously? This is even a contest? Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way.

[DomaDoma]

Seriously? This is even a contest? Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way.

Dementia is still more a name than Blues-harp. Or Backyard, for that matter.

Actually, going by what we have so far, Tew Yssup is the undefeated champion.

[Thialfi]

I am going to have to go with Katniss Everdeen.

[hobbitkniver]

Unobtanium. Not a character, but come on.

[VeisuItaTyhjyys]

Darth Duce would be a cool nickname for a .22

[Admiral Squish]

Dementia is still more a name than Blues-harp. Or Backyard, for that matter.

Actually, going by what we have so far, Tew Yssup is the undefeated champion.

It's not about if it's a name or not, it's about how HORRIBLE it is AS a name. Granted, blues-harp is pretty bad, but dark'ness? Come on. It just demands that you hate her.

[Eldan]

Unobtanium. Not a character, but come on.

Scientists are using that word.

[SurlySeraph]

Blues-harp Babysplit of Death Note: Another Note. It's particularly bad because you're in the middle of this Ramping Up For The Big Confrontation Now scene, you're getting really tense, and then... Blues-harp Babysplit. I mean, Tsugumi Ohba doesn't exactly have his head around English names (Quillsh?), but at least he can tell them apart from a vomiting dictionary.

Blues-harp Babysplit at least sounds like a very odd mobster nickname. There is no excuse for Quillsh Wammy.

[factotum]

Can we have the name of an entire race? Because if so, the Wankh from Jack Vance's books have unfortunate connotations if you're British...so much so that I think they changed it to Wannek in the recent reprints! :smallbiggrin:

[Coidzor]

Well, there was this one character from, I believe Tamora Pierce, who is a mere "Miss" honorific from being Misandry (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Misandry).

Facepalmed when I saw that.

Edit: On the note of Xenophilius Lovegood's name... It had certain *ahem* Unfortunate Implications to me when I read it. I'll leave why as an exercise for the reader...

[DomaDoma]

I am going to have to go with Katniss Everdeen.

Really? Nobody from District 1 strikes you as a better candidate?

Okay, I guess since District 1 names are supposed to be ridiculous, you may have a point.

[Xefas]

Exalted has "Chejop Kejak", a millennia-old bureaucrat slash kung-fu master that basically runs Heaven.

I can forgive many of these other names, because they're meant to be obvious jokes, parodies, or inherently lighthearted. Harry Potter is a series of lighthearted books for adolescents. Sexual innuendo names are supposed to be bad. "Unobtainium" was a deliberate parody.

But, "Chejop Kejak", so far as I know, was meant to seriously be a mysterious, debonnaire name. And this is in a universe where it's perfectly acceptable to change your name around when you feel like it, so its not that he was born with a horrible name and subsequently stuck with it. If your parents happen to be particularly cruel, and you wind up with a name like "Impotence Goatfancier" or "Loser McWhinybritches", no one bats an eye at you if you up and decide to start calling yourself "Max Fightmaster (http://www.cracked.com/article_14982_9-manliest-names-in-world.html)".

For some reason, Chejop Kejak decided that he'd rather dispense with all that nonsense and sound like the most egregious congregation of consonant sounds since they started naming Murlocs in WoW.

[Eldan]

Don't think Chejop Kejak sounds bad in any way. I've heard worse names (with a lot more consonants) in real life.

[DomaDoma]

It's not about if it's a name or not, it's about how HORRIBLE it is AS a name. Granted, blues-harp is pretty bad, but dark'ness? Come on. It just demands that you hate her.

I don't know why people don't get that My Immortal is a trollfic. Seriously, the spelling and conventions get steadily worse with every chapter. Should be an indicator.

[Admiral Squish]

I don't know why people don't get that My Immortal is a trollfic. Seriously, the spelling and conventions get steadily worse with every chapter. Should be an indicator.

I believe it's a trollfic, myself, but only because the alternative is too horrible to contemplate...

[Coidzor]

I don't know why people don't get that My Immortal is a trollfic. Seriously, the spelling and conventions get steadily worse with every chapter. Should be an indicator.

Well, a combination of intense misanthropy and not wanting to read the worst thing ever written would account for a fair bit both by themselves and in combination.

[Xefas]

Don't think Chejop Kejak sounds bad in any way. I've heard worse names (with a lot more consonants) in real life.

Well, its not really the number of consonants, but just the way they fit together. I find it hard to take him seriously at the table when everyone around him is named stuff like "Hran-Tzu", "Hu Dai Liang", "Nara-O", "Taru-Han", but at the top you've got Chejop Kejak, which just sticks out like a sore thumb. Just...say the words. Out loud. Try to say them with utmost respect and a hint of mysteriousness. Try to say them in a whisper, with fear and animosity.

Now try to do it in a room full of other people without making them all break into bouts of suppressed laughter and ruining the mood.

[Eldan]

Sorry, but, I can whisper the name, and say it out loud and, probably, even shout it dramatically. It works for me.

Sounds a bit south Asian, instead of east Asian, like your other examples. Thai, perhaps, or somewhere around there.

[Xefas]

Sorry, but, I can whisper the name, and say it out loud and, probably, even shout it dramatically. It works for me.

Sounds a bit south Asian, instead of east Asian, like your other examples. Thai, perhaps, or somewhere around there.

Ah, alright. Maybe it's just me, then. I withdraw my contestant.

[Friv]

Well, its not really the number of consonants, but just the way they fit together. I find it hard to take him seriously at the table when everyone around him is named stuff like "Hran-Tzu", "Hu Dai Liang", "Nara-O", "Taru-Han", but at the top you've got Chejop Kejak, which just sticks out like a sore thumb. Just...say the words. Out loud. Try to say them with utmost respect and a hint of mysteriousness. Try to say them in a whisper, with fear and animosity.

Now try to do it in a room full of other people without making them all break into bouts of suppressed laughter and ruining the mood.

I think it would depend a lot on how you pronounce it. In our games, I've gone with "shay-jhop kay-jhack." Lengthening the vowels makes it work. On the other, if I went with a purely anglecized Cheh-jup Kej-jack it would just sort of stumble over my tongue and sound stupid.

[Eldan]

I pronounce it really guttural.

Che (like Che Guevara) - chop Kke (with a really strong K, but that's just a part of speaking Swiss German, it has that a lot) -Tshack. Rhymes with Duck.

[Closet_Skeleton]

Scientists are using that word.

No. Engineers use that word. There's a differance.


Jacuzzi Splot (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baccano!).

That's a so bad its awesome name, not a bad name.

The names of any non-American character in a comic book tend towards the terrible.

[Coidzor]

I can only say it like a Klingon myself. All anger and spit and gutturality.

[Eldan]

No. Engineers use that word. There's a differance.
.

Well, I know at least one Doctor who does. Doctor of Biology, and not for anything having to do with his work, but still :smalltongue:

[Haruki-kun]

Ragna the Bloodedge. Say whatever you want about BlazBlue, that name is ridiculous. :smalltongue:

Not really. It's not like his name is actually "the Bloodedge", that's just what they call him.


I am going to have to go with Katniss Everdeen.

Hmm.....it's a weird name, but I don't think it's the worst in fiction.

[Science Officer]

Darth Vader and Darth Sidious were fine.
But what about Darth Fection? Or Darth Truder? Or Darth Ception? Darth Duce? Darth Tegrate? Darth Centive? Darth Ane? Darth Cessant? Darth Nocence?

What happened to the THEME?!?

You think the theme was that Darth replaced "In-"?
I'm sorry, but that's not why Darth Vader was so named.
Note: I have no idea if this (http://lookwayup.com/lwu.exe/lwu/toEng?s=d&w=vader&slang=Nld)is actually the reason. Pure conecture on my part.


Isaac Van Der Grimnebulin from Perdido Street Station drew some complaints from my friends. I thought it was fine.

'Killy' from BLAME! just doesn't work for me.

And, not the name of a character, but the name of a series and an organisation, one of my friends just could not get over the fact that the Invisibles weren't actually invisible.

[Dvandemon]

That's hardly an excuse. Even for a minor character, someone with a word that means "love" in one name and the last name "Lovegood" is pretty dumb. In fact, both his names have "love" in them. A little redundant, really.

There's obviously a line drawn between lame and awesome; case in point, Magnus ver Magnusson (not fictional though).

[Closet_Skeleton]

You think the theme was that Darth replaced "In-"?
I'm sorry, but that's not why Darth Vader was so named.
Note: I have no idea if this (http://lookwayup.com/lwu.exe/lwu/toEng?s=d&w=vader&slang=Nld)is actually the reason. Pure conecture on my part.

In one of the early drafts, Kane Starkiller is the hero's dad, Prince Valorum is the enemy force user and Darth Vader is some random general with a deskjob.

Before writing Star Wars, Lucas wrote a random list of space opera sounding names down and reshuffled them as he developed the various drafts. Some of these names (like Mace) never turned up until the prequels while others have filtered into the EU.

So none of the names of the characters have any real meaning, they're just there to sound cool.

[Obrysii]

So none of the names of the characters have any real meaning, they're just there to sound cool.

Although "Vader" is rather close to "Vater" or "Father" ... which is a remarkable coincidence considering the character "Darth Vader" ("dark father"?) ultimately became.

Skywalker would be seen as lame, but they've mentioned in the EU about Luke levitating whilst mediating and the character (Corran) noting that that must have been how his family got its name.


However, that said, this thread is a little too ethnocentric to me. Who's to say what is a lame name? The OP mentions one - but based on the rest of the setting, that's not too bad. Look at Dumbledore's name. Look at any of the older generation, for the most part. Nymphadora? A guy named Lupin who turns into a wolf?

The problem with fiction is that we all look at it with an ethnocentric point of view - not a point of view of a member of that society.

To me, a lot of Chinese names are weird - but to a Chinese individual, my name is weird.

Same goes for fiction.

[Hawkfrost000]

Adama;

awesome character but ridiculous name

[Lord Raziere]

Naruto. The name of the guy himself. Why? that and he was named after something in ramen.....seriously why name someone after a food? Its like naming somebody "Apple." could you imagine yourself going through your life calling yourself Apple Uzumaki? I can't.

[Coidzor]

Naruto. The name of the guy himself. Why? that and he was named after something in ramen.....seriously why name someone after a food? Its like naming somebody "Apple." could you imagine yourself going through your life calling yourself Apple Uzumaki? I can't.

Poor Appul....:smallfrown:

[Friv]

Naruto. The name of the guy himself. Why? that and he was named after something in ramen.....seriously why name someone after a food? Its like naming somebody "Apple." could you imagine yourself going through your life calling yourself Apple Uzumaki? I can't.

Rose. Lily. Hope. Lance. Bill.

[Lord Raziere]

Rose. Lily. Hope. Lance. Bill.

.....Touche.

[Coidzor]

A guy named Lupin who turns into a wolf?

The problem with fiction is that we all look at it with an ethnocentric point of view - not a point of view of a member of that society.

To me, a lot of Chinese names are weird - but to a Chinese individual, my name is weird.

Same goes for fiction.

Yeah, but with enough exposure to how they generally look and sound the names of other cultural/ethnic groups become mundane, such that poor attempts to ape their style become all the more glaring.

Ahh, Lupin. I remember thinking of this one sketch about a Robin Hood Parody who just wasn't any good at the job and was named after the flowers (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Lupinus)he kept pulling out of nowhere and making a big deal of being named after. It was like from Mad TV or something. When I saw his name I had that sketch stuck in my head for weeks afterward. x.x

Dumbledore has been parodied a fair bit, yeah.

...Nymphadora just made me think of someone with the gift of nymphomania. And still does.:smallsigh: So, yeah, I'd agree that it's pretty silly. Not the worst name I've ever heard though or even in the running of badness, just a bit silly to me.

Mostly because I've actually repressed several characters' names they were so egregious.


Rose. Lily. Hope. Lance. Bill.

Heck, Red and its equivalents across several languages.

[Lurkmoar]

Naruto. The name of the guy himself. Why? that and he was named after something in ramen.....seriously why name someone after a food? Its like naming somebody "Apple." could you imagine yourself going through your life calling yourself Apple Uzumaki? I can't.

Actually, Naruto's dad named him from a character in Jiraiya's book. Jiraiya even said the book character was named from ramen. So food while food was involved, it was more about the book. But whatever, I got over Travis Touchdown.

[Haruki-kun]

Come to think of it... Lelouch Lamperouge. Never mind the last name. Lelouch is....such a strange name. I'd never heard it before. :smallconfused:

Light Yagami. It's odd to hear "Light" as a name, never mind as a Japanese name.

Ash Ketchum. His name was just Satoshi. They added the pun in his last name when they translated it.

Simon from Gurren Lagann.... for no reason other than his name is pronounced "See-mon". Never heard it like that.

I guess none of these are really the worst I've heard, but certainly worth mentioning.

[Dvandemon]

In terms of parody, Voldemort is even worse than Dumbledore.

Naruto. The name of the guy himself. Why? that and he was named after something in ramen.....seriously why name someone after a food? Its like naming somebody "Apple." could you imagine yourself going through your life calling yourself Apple Uzumaki? I can't.

Ah, but you're ignorant of the cultural significance of the name. Naruto, the food, gains its name from the swirl pattern in the loaf. This is in line with his last name, Uzumaki, which also refers to the spiral (generally 3D spirals such as whirlpools). Notice the design in his shirt, the look of his signature super move?

[Nosferocktu]

Every. Single. DBZ. Character. It's either food or something ridiculous. Heck (Bibbidi, Baba-di, Buu) is just a dead givaway.

[Lurkmoar]

In terms of parody, Voldemort is even worse than Dumbledore.


Ah, but you're ignorant of the cultural significance of the name. Naruto, the food, gains its name from the swirl pattern in the loaf. This is in line with his last name, Uzumaki, which also refers to the spiral (generally 3D spirals such as whirlpools). Notice the design in his shirt, the look of his signature super move?

I'm not ignorant of his significance of the name, I was only pointing out the circumstances of his pops choosing it. That's different from why the AUTHOR choose of it of course.

[Xefas]

Heck, Red and its equivalents across several languages.

http://i925.photobucket.com/albums/ad91/bluejanus/Red.png

(Also, in that same vein, "Violet", although that might be a reference to the flower instead of the color.)

[Coidzor]

^: Heh. Indeed! :smallbiggrin:
Simon from Gurren Lagann.... for no reason other than his name is pronounced "See-mon". Never heard it like that.

Oh, yeah. Translation decisions that are just a giant middle finger to the actual language that's being translated into are just... ugh....:smallyuk:


In terms of parody, Voldemort is even worse than Dumbledore.

Ahh, yes. Who can forget Lord Moldypants (http://www.sluggy.com/comics/archives/daily/080424)? :smallamused:

[Haruki-kun]

Oh, yeah. Translation decisions that are just a giant middle finger to the actual language that's being translated into are just... ugh....:smallyuk:

Actually, it was pronounced like that in the original Japanese language, too. It sounds weird.

[GoatBoy]

The various names of Dave Ryder:

* Beat PunchBeef

* Big McLargeHuge

* Blast HardCheese

* Blast ThickNeck

* Bold BigFlank

* Bolt VanderHuge

* Brick HardMeat

* Buck PlankChest

* Buff DrinkLots

* Buff HardBack

* Butch DeadLift

* Crud BoneMeal

* Crunch ButtSteak

* Dirk HardPec

* Fist RockBone

* Flint IronStag

* Fridge LargeMeat

* Gristle McThornBody

* Hack BlowFist

* Lump BeefBroth

* Punch RockGroin

* Punch Side-Iron

* Punt SpeedChunk

* Reef BlastBody

* Roll Fizzlebeef

* Rip SteakFace

* Slab BulkHead

* Slab SquatThrust

* Slate Fistcrunch

* Slate SlabRock

* Smash LampJaw

* Smoke ManMuscle

* Splint ChestHair

* Stump BeefKnob

* Stump Chunkman

* Thick McRunFast

* Touch RustRod

* Trunk SlamChest

* Whip SlagCheek

[Terraoblivion]

Ummm...you people do know that Simon as a name exists in languages that aren't English, right? And that in a lot of those languages it is pronounced quite similar to how it is in the show. Like that is pretty much exactly how it's pronounced in Danish, for example.

[Haruki-kun]

Ummm...you people do know that Simon as a name exists in languages that aren't English, right? And that in a lot of those languages it is pronounced quite similar to how it is in the show. Like that is pretty much exactly how it's pronounced in Danish, for example.

I do, in my native language (Spanish) it happens as well. I just tend to assume it was borrowed from English.

EDIT: And then, the stress is on the wrong syllable. It goes "Simón".

EDIT 2: I just thought it was a weird pronounciation, that's all.

[Friv]

Actually, it was pronounced like that in the original Japanese language, too. It sounds weird.

I think that was the point. Simon's name is pronounced oddly in Japanese because the normal syllables English-speakers would use don't really exist. But when they translated it back into English, they kept the Japanese pronunciation for no good reason. It would be like if English watchers of Full Metal Alchemist were spending their time watching the adventures of Edo and Aru.

It's fine in Japanese, because that's what accents do, and I'm sure we do the same thing to Japanese names constantly. It's stupid in English.

[Coidzor]

Actually, it was pronounced like that in the original Japanese language, too. It sounds weird.

Then the point stands, only it's worse because the original guys making the story couldn't be bothered.

[Gwyn chan 'r Gwyll]

Ahh, Lupin. I remember thinking of this one sketch about a Robin Hood Parody who just wasn't any good at the job and was named after the flowers (https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Lupinus)he kept pulling out of nowhere and making a big deal of being named after. It was like from Mad TV or something. When I saw his name I had that sketch stuck in my head for weeks afterward. x.x

Monty Python. Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, riding through the night. Dennis Moore Dennis Moore, dah de dah de dah. He steals from the rich, and gives to the poor, Dennis moor, Dennis Moore, dah de dah... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLkhx0eqK5w)

[Haruki-kun]

I think that was the point. Simon's name is pronounced oddly in Japanese because the normal syllables English-speakers would use don't really exist. But when they translated it back into English, they kept the Japanese pronunciation for no good reason. It would be like if English watchers of Full Metal Alchemist were spending their time watching the adventures of Edo and Aru.

It's fine in Japanese, because that's what accents do, and I'm sure we do the same thing to Japanese names constantly. It's stupid in English.

But... they COULD pronounce it Saimon. That's a valid pronounciation.

[Valameer]

I know we've mentioned that this is all subjective to culture, but that reminded me of another one.

Butz from Final Fantasy V. Ok, maybe Butz sounds like a good strong main character name to the Japanese, I don't know. I'm just saying it raised a few eyebrows across the pond here.

[Coidzor]

Monty Python. Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, riding through the night. Dennis Moore Dennis Moore, dah de dah de dah. He steals from the rich, and gives to the poor, Dennis moor, Dennis Moore, dah de dah... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLkhx0eqK5w)

... ... How on earth did I manage to see that on american television at that age? :smalleek:

[Jallorn]

How about Star Trek Voyager's Interferometric pulse/ray/field/whatever?

Guess what it does. That's right, it interferes with Voyager's shields weapons and whatever else might be useful.

[Rob Roy]

Xenophilius Lovegood
I raise you one Elvendork. (http://www.suite101.com/content/the-harry-potter-prequel-a56798)

[BiblioRook]

Ugh, Simon R. Green.
No, not his name, just the name of every single character in his books. He truly has the worst character names I've ever read and it completely ruined his books for me. It's like he assigned naming duties to a ten year-old, people in his world don't have names but rather ridiculous nicknames that somehow they try to make seem serious. Stuff like Edwin Drood, Janissary Jane (a mercenary), and 'The Blue Fairy' (a gay half-elf).

[Trazoi]

Butz from Final Fantasy V. Ok, maybe Butz sounds like a good strong main character name to the Japanese, I don't know. I'm just saying it raised a few eyebrows across the pond here.
:smallsmile: I remember the first time I played FFV I swore to myself I wouldn't change any of the names so I'd know who people were talking about when they discussed the game.

First name comes up - BUTZ
Me: *sigh* - delete delete delete delete *promise broken*

[Shadow of the Sun]

Admittedly, "Butz" is a mistranslation. "Bartz" would be closer to what it's supposed to mean.

[pffh]

There's obviously a line drawn between lame and awesome; case in point, Magnus ver Magnusson (not fictional though).

Wait what's wrong with Magnús Ver Magnússon? Ver is his family name and Magnússon just means the son of Magnús (as in his dads name is Magnús) and it's very common here to name your kids after a grandparent or a parent.

[Pronounceable]

***** Galore. It's so ****ing stupid it's not even funny. Yes extremely asinine girl naming such as Honey Rider and Kissy Suzuki is a usual condition in Bond movies, but come the **** on! ***** Galore (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goldfinger_%28film%29)? Board doesn't even let me type or link it. Even the board can't stand this dumbacity. :smallfurious:

[TheThan]

***** Galore. It's so ****ing stupid it's not even funny. Yes extremely asinine girl naming such as Honey Rider and Kissy Suzuki is a usual condition in Bond movies, but come the **** on! ***** Galore (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goldfinger_%28film%29)? Board doesn't even let me type or link it. Even the board can't stand this dumbacity. :smallfurious:

But without stupid names for the bond chicks, we wouldn't have scenes like this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sf4xw4mE2Xk

[shadow_archmagi]

Janissary Jane (a mercenary)

I havn't read the books at all ever, but I feel the need to point out that Janissary is a real word. The Janissaries were kidnapped children who were raised to be the personal bodyguard/household of Turkish sultans.

So it's still a very silly name, since it's effectively the same as Ninja Nina or Saudukar Sally.

[BiblioRook]

I havn't read the books at all ever, but I feel the need to point out that Janissary is a real word. The Janissaries were kidnapped children who were raised to be the personal bodyguard/household of Turkish sultans.

So it's still a very silly name, since it's effectively the same as Ninja Nina or Saudukar Sally.

I knew that and that was precisely my point, in that was her 'actual' name and not just simply something they called her. Nearly all the caricatures were named like that.

[Valameer]

Coulda been worse. Coulda been Janissary Janice.

[Eldan]

I've had a player who built Barba, the Barbarian.

[Athaniar]

Wouldn't be surprised to find a Darth Anger, Darth Goth, Darth Vile, Darth Khan (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRnSnfiUI54), or Darth Binks somewhere out in the EU.

Well, there is a Kaan (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Kaan). But still, the worst Darth name has to be Darth Scabrous (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Darth_Scabrous). Or maybe Darth Karnage (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Darth_Karnage). It has a K, that means it's cooler!

Also, some of World of Warcraft's pop culture references are... not very good. Haris Pilton (http://www.wowpedia.org/Haris_Pilton), while not that bad, is very obvious. Moi'bff Jill (http://www.wowpedia.org/Warden_Moi%27bff_Jill), however, is horrible. When Lolol is a better name, you know it's bad. Also, for general names, Bamm Megabomb (http://www.wowpedia.org/Bamm_Megabomb) would be quite horrible, but since he's a goblin it's somewhat more acceptable than otherwise.

[Eleanor_Rigby]

I've had a player who built Barba, the Barbarian.

I think I would probably have sat their imagining the PC to look something like this (http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://thefilmreview.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/08/BabarPoster.jpg&imgrefurl=http://thefilmreview.com/film-news/babar-film-producers-twilight.html&usg=__9MYiVNJdu4REDf3jj_t6LZPBhhQ=&h=568&w=757&sz=236&hl=en&start=16&zoom=1&tbnid=RR7YpfpVDkpopM:&tbnh=156&tbnw=193&ei=MVRUTfaBCoSJhQf37NznCA&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dbabar%2Bthe%2Belephant%26um%3D1%26hl% 3Den%26newwindow%3D1%26sa%3DN%26biw%3D1029%26bih%3 D652%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=744&vpy=264&dur=3219&hovh=194&hovw=259&tx=132&ty=134&oei=-lNUTYWOM4aBhQe0mYDOCA&esq=11&page=2&ndsp=15&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:16) :smallbiggrin:
...I think it's my dyslexia...


Although "Vader" is rather close to "Vater" or "Father" ... which is a remarkable coincidence considering the character "Darth Vader" ("dark father"?) ultimately became.


Yeah... signs have pointed to Lucas having mostly made Star Wars up as he went along, I've read in a couple of places that the main reason behind Obi-Wan's explanation that "Darth Vader killed your father" was that at the time, that was the explanation, same goes for the squicky false-start romance between Luke and Leia.
Star Wars expanded universe seems to be a good source for terrible names, e.g: pretty much every wookie name besides Chewbacca (which some may argue should probably fall under slightly 'dodgy'. It's basically chewing tobacco, is it not?) ...of course Jabba the Hut is from the original films and the christmas special is supposedly canon or something so...


"Xeno" could be translated more accurately to "strange" or "alien," though. Hence, the xenomorphs. Xenophilius is a lover of the weird. In the book, he's an eccentric conspiracy theorist, and not the kind who happens to know The Truth. He's also a pretty minor character.


Remus Lupin is a werewolf. Sirius Black can transform into a black dog. Xenophilius Lovegood is not a bad name at all; It actually fits perfectly to his character.

Yeah... given Xenophilius's character I think assuming that his parents had similar 'beliefs' isn't too far a stretch and so it seems perfectly logical that they gave him such a name. Is it a terrible name if it's perfectly plausible they would have been given it?
Remus Lupin and Sirius Black are much worse than Xenophilius Lovegood in my opinion. One might argue that Sirius used his name as inspiration for his animagus form and there's a precedent of astrological names in the family (Andromeda, Bellatrix) so I guess I can let that one slide, but a kid who got bitten by a werewolf being named Remus Lupin before the incident? :smallsigh:
They are books written for children though.

I think Winky the alcoholic house elf merits an honorable mention. A lot of Harry Potter names are kind of naff, even the muggles Dudley Dursley for one, and I think we all know the real reason Petunia Evans envied her magical sister was that the darned girl kept calling her Tuney.


In terms of parody, Voldemort is even worse than Dumbledore.

Voldemort is bad enough to be mocked in-universe.
(I had not seen Lord Mouldypants, but it raises a valid and humourous point.)


Are any of these names really worse than Cordio Muffinhead?

I don't know but I do know that that sounds superb. Source?

[Coidzor]

Yeah... given Xenophilius's character I think assuming that his parents had similar 'beliefs' isn't too far a stretch and so it seems perfectly logical that they gave him such a name. Is it a terrible name if it's perfectly plausible they would have been given it?

Yes. Yes it is. It's a bit like naming your child GoatMolester in latin.

[Eleanor_Rigby]

Yes. Yes it is. It's a bit like naming your child GoatMolester in latin.

I meant if it's plausible that the parents/guardians/character would have chosen that name for the character then it's not necessarily a bad fictional name: it makes sense in-universe. At least in the context of the story it's fairly logical. I'm not advocating anybody naming their child Xenophilius but there are plenty of people in real life who would consider doing it.
Also, I don't know what the latin for GoatMolester is, but I'm pretty sure plenty of parents would quite hapily name their child that if they liked the sound of it.
Example: I know a couple who gave their first son a name which meant 'Old hag' in Spanish despite the fact that the father's grandfather was Spanish... his side of the family weren't too impressed.

[Claudius Maximus]

Ibexcontrector?

Almost sounds like a trolltag...

I'm sure I could come up with a better one if I had my old Catullus dictionary.

[Worlok]

I've had a player who built Barba, the Barbarian.
In the tradition of Fi-Tor, the Fighter. :smallbiggrin:

[Lurkmoar]

In the tradition of Fi-Tor, the Fighter. :smallbiggrin:

Get out of here, are you serious? Sounds like something out of Gor.

[Eleanor_Rigby]

Unobtanium. Not a character, but come on.

This reminds me of the metal that Dalek casings are supposed to be made from: Dalekenium

...can't seem to think of any terrible fiction character names yet...

[Worlok]

Get out of here, are you serious? Sounds like something out of Gor.
DM of the Rings (http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=1231), actually. :smallbiggrin: Or "Fear the Boot", as the author himself says. But I don't know anything about the latter. :smallconfused:

[dgnslyr]

*snip*

Can I get the link of where you got this list? I've seen it before, but my google-fu fails me.

And why does Xenophilus Lovegood sound like some kind of bad pornstar name? Anything with Lovegood at the end does, but this? Ugh, I don't want to think too hard about what kind of bad movie would have a Xenophilus Lovegood.

[Lurkmoar]

DM of the Rings (http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=1231), actually. :smallbiggrin: Or "Fear the Boot", as the author himself says. But I don't know anything about the latter. :smallconfused:

You're not missing anything worthwhile. Trust me.

I forgot that part of DM of the Rings. Heh, that was a good joke.

[MoonCat]

When it comes to a ridiculous name for the author to create because they think it sounds nice:

Artemis Rose Eccles

:smallsigh::smallsigh::smallsigh:

(she also happens to be an enormous Mary Sue)

[Worlok]

You're not missing anything worthwhile. Trust me.

I forgot that part of DM of the Rings. Heh, that was a good joke.
Alright, can do.

And yes, yes it was. Most of DMotR is, after all. :smallbiggrin:

[AtlanteanTroll]

Hinata Hyuga, which Jump has said to mean "Happy Place Happy Place" in one of it's Japanese lessons. :smallannoyed:

[Lurkmoar]

Hinata Hyuga, which Jump has said to mean "Happy Place Happy Place" in one of it's Japanese lessons. :smallannoyed:

I thought Sunshine or turn towards the sun was in there... been awhile since I checked.

[AtlanteanTroll]

I thought Sunshine or turn towards the sun was in there... been awhile since I checked.

I think it went either way. *shrugs*

Also, Elvendork is NOT a horrible name. As the short-lived Sims 3 Generation play-through will kindly point out. :smalltongue:

[John Cribati]

In the tradition of Fi-Tor, the Fighter. :smallbiggrin:

Rayne Jerr
Pal Adin
Drew Id.
Wiz Aard
Claire Rick.

[shadow_archmagi]

Rayne Jerr
Pal Adin
Drew Id.
Wiz Aard
Claire Rick.

Arty Fisher

[Worlok]

Rayne Jerr
Pal Adin
Drew Id.
Wiz Aard
Claire Rick.Arty Fisher
... Archie Wist? Sir Serrer? :smalltongue:

[unosarta]

I think that was the point. Simon's name is pronounced oddly in Japanese because the normal syllables English-speakers would use don't really exist. But when they translated it back into English, they kept the Japanese pronunciation for no good reason. It would be like if English watchers of Full Metal Alchemist were spending their time watching the adventures of Edo and Aru.

It's fine in Japanese, because that's what accents do, and I'm sure we do the same thing to Japanese names constantly. It's stupid in English.

I know that Haruki-kun already partially bespoke this, but I needed to correct.

Actually, I am going to have to push back on this, because Simon, (as in Sai/sy and mon/man) is perfectly able to be spoken in Japanese, as サイモン, or Saimon. Actually, there really is no syllable in that name that would be impossible to pronounce. However, the fact that they decided to say シモン, or Shimon, implies that they were either saying Shimon, or that they were saying Seemon, since si (as see) isn't pronounceable in the Japanese language.

So, the translators were entirely logical in their translation. The difference between this and having "Edo" and "Aru" is that Edd has a hard stop consonant ending, which does not appear in the Japanese language, and Al has an "l" which does not appear in the Japanese language. Simon, not necessarily in how it is spelled, but in how it is spoken, is perfectly pronounceable in Japanese.

Just thought I would interject with that.



... Archie Wist?

Only if he is German/Austrian.

[Cheesegear]

Thursday Next.

Just about everyone in the series has a similar, silly name as her.

Landon Parke-Lain
Billden Parke-Lain
Houson Parke-Lain.

...Yes. Those are Monopoly puns. Terrible puns. How is 'Houson' even a name?

Jack Schitt even makes an appearance. :smallsigh:

[BiblioRook]

Thursday Next.

Just about everyone in the series has a similar, silly name as her.
I give ones like that pass as they are supposed to be silly.
Silly names in a work made to be more or less serious don't have such an excuse.

[GoatBoy]

Can I get the link of where you got this list? I've seen it before, but my google-fu fails me.


Satellite of Love, baby. (http://mst3k.wikia.com/wiki/List_of_Nicknames_for_Dave_Ryder)

[Eldan]

I know that Haruki-kun already partially bespoke this, but I needed to correct.

Actually, I am going to have to push back on this, because Simon, (as in Sai/sy and mon/man) is perfectly able to be spoken in Japanese, as サイモン, or Saimon. Actually, there really is no syllable in that name that would be impossible to pronounce. However, the fact that they decided to say シモン, or Shimon, implies that they were either saying Shimon, or that they were saying Seemon, since si (as see) isn't pronounceable in the Japanese language.

Only if he is German/Austrian.

There is, however, no real reason why they should go with the English Saimon over the Greek Simon or the Hebrew Shimon, just saying.

[Rutskarn]

Accept no substitutes for Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Tara Way.

[pffh]

Accept no substitutes for Ebony Enoby Dark'ness Dementia Raven Tara Way.

Yeah that is truly a horrid name.

There is a Vrykul (Viking expy) in WoW that's called Thane Banahogg the deathblow. Banahogg means deathblow so his name is Thane Deathblow the Deathblow.

[Comet]

I think the Gurren Lagann Simon sounds better than the English Simon, mainly because the world is filled with weird names anyway. Kamina, Yoko, Lordgenome and so on.

And hey, this is off topic anyway, since Simon can't be the "worst fictional name ever" just because it happens to resemble a real name in written form. That just makes no sense.

[Coidzor]

And hey, this is off topic anyway, since Simon can't be the "worst fictional name ever" just because it happens to resemble a real name in written form. That just makes no sense.

It's proximity to something that sounds right makes it all the more grating, being the logic behind that.

And if we wanna get into semantics.... It is about the worst fictional name ever heard.

[Eldan]

It's not a fictional name, though. It's a perfectly normal Hebrew name, that just happens to be pronounced differently in English.
I think the question is rather why he has a Hebrew/Greek/English whatever name when his village-mate is called Kamina.

[Comet]

I never thought of it as a Hebrew name in this particular case, though it matches in form.

I just think the Japanese director used it because it sounds cool. And, if you look just at the form itself and forget any links to real world naming, it does work pretty well with Kamina and the others.

edit @V: Fair enough, though I still stand by the notion that the Japanese just like to use foreign words that look cool without thinking about their actual history or meaning. And that's why I love them so :smallbiggrin:

[Eldan]

It's just that I have known three Sea-mons and one Sheemon, so it's a bit grating if people tell me these names don't exist :smallwink:

[Cheesegear]

Accept no substitutes for Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Tara Way.

But she is merely the substitute for Enoby.

[Themrys]

It is hard to beat Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Tara Way, but each Japanese name given, for no apparent in-story reason, to German characters in a German setting in a fan/original fiction written by a German teenager is almost as bad.

Oh, and of course everything with the last name of "Darkness" or "Dark" or something similar in a German Setting. The "tries to sound cool with foreign language" adds a +5 sillyness bonus.

[Eldan]

That goes both directions, though. Random German in an English setting is just as bad.

[Innis Cabal]

They just take some omnominous sounding word and hammer it into place. Darth Sidious, Darth Bane, Darth Maul, Darth Plagueis.

I don't recall any Darth names that inspired hunger in me or anything like that. At least none of the names you listed though Plagueis does make me a tad thirsty when I read it.

[Avilan the Grey]

I don't remember where I heard it but there was a novel or short story with an Epic Fail for the female supporting character. She was described as a beautiful Russian agent, but the author had named her "Klovka", and all I could think of was "Steroid-ridden 1970ies Russian short-put athlete. With mustache".

[Winthur]

How about Roddy McGristle, Drizzt's nemesis-for-one-book whom I couldn't help but imagine as a raging pile of Scottish fury? Complete with bagpipes and a skirt? :smalltongue:

[ArlEammon]

Someone in Arizona was a famous, decent, good natured mayor. His name?

Hairy Baals.

[Eldan]

"Hairy", really? Not even "Harry"? Why did his parents hate him so much?

[Yora]

Oh, and of course everything with the last name of "Darkness" or "Dark" or something similar in a German Setting. The "tries to sound cool with foreign language" adds a +5 sillyness bonus.

That goes both directions, though. Random German in an English setting is just as bad.
Funny that you say that. When I saw just the threads title, I immediately knew that for me it would be without any doubt: "Dark Schneider"

[John Cribati]

Fair enough, though I still stand by the notion that the Japanese just like to use foreign words that look cool without thinking about their actual history or meaning. And that's why I love them so :smallbiggrin:

Don't we Americans like to do that, too? I'm totally okay with calling Simon See-Moan because I can't find a normal-sounding name in that show anyway. Having normal old "Simon" in there would be out of place, though I guess not for the character himself.

[The Big Dice]

How about Roddy McGristle, Drizzt's nemesis-for-one-book whom I couldn't help but imagine as a raging pile of Scottish fury? Complete with bagpipes and a skirt? :smalltongue:

The Drizzt books are filled with abysmal names. Especially among the dwarf community. In fact, the Realms are exclusively populated by people with bad names. Take a look at this list (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Forgotten_Realms_characters) if you don't believe me.

[Comet]

Don't we Americans like to do that, too?

Yeah, you do. As do the Europeans, the Chinese, the Russians and pretty much everyone else. Everyone seems to agree that foreign things are automatically cool, which is entirely true :smallcool:
It's just that I seem to detect a sort of excitement towards western culture (mainly English and German as far as languages go) in Japan that is really unprecedented in scale and intensity.
Speaking of which, Gunbuster's very own secondary badass mech pilot chick Jung Freud fits this topic pretty gloriously. Oh Anno, never change.

[Kneenibble]

No no, my name is spelt Raymond Luxury Yacht, but it's pronounced Throatwobbler Mangrove.

[Dante & Vergil]

Lots of funny names.:smallbiggrin:


Most of these are double entendres. They made me laugh pretty hard.

[TheThan]

Roy from mystery men came up with a pretty bad one, granted he was trying to protect his secret identity and impress the chick. The name he chose?
Dirk Dark.

[DomaDoma]

How about Roddy McGristle, Drizzt's nemesis-for-one-book whom I couldn't help but imagine as a raging pile of Scottish fury? Complete with bagpipes and a skirt? :smalltongue:

It doesn't help that he was a really lame villain to begin with.