View Full Version : Advertise for my fake RPG

2011-03-22, 01:09 PM
It is a school assignment, I have to make an advertisement for something. I decided to do a fake RPG called Cardasy (like card + fantasy). It uses a standard deck of cards instead of dice, has a very short campaign length, simple rules, and only a quick-start guide. The theme is that it is an RPG that is not strictly for nerds. The catch phrase is "Cardasy, the everybody Roleplaying Game."

EDIT: Could some people please post about how they absolutely love this game. (Basically, give it the same sort of deal that you see the people on TV do about how people recommend it and get all dramatic about it.)

2011-03-22, 01:10 PM

Whatcha looking for?

2011-03-22, 01:10 PM
^^What Tyndyr said. I'm unsure as to what you're trying to ask/request/tell us here.

2011-03-22, 01:11 PM

Whatcha looking for?

Basically, post some stuff on here saying that this game is totally awesome, you recommend it, it was easy, you are not a nerd, etc.

The Rose Dragon
2011-03-22, 01:12 PM
But I am a nerd.

Sort of. I am a geek. Does that count?

2011-03-22, 01:13 PM
But I am a nerd.

Sort of. I am a geek. Does that count?

Ya, sure, just say something about it being awesome.

2011-03-22, 01:13 PM
Basically, post some stuff on here saying that this game is totally awesome, you recommend it, it was easy, you are not a nerd, etc.

...I'm curious. How does this help? If it's fake testimonials you want, can't you make those yourself?

Basically, why does it need to come from the forums?

*is confused*

2011-03-22, 01:15 PM
...I'm curious. How does this help? If it's fake testimonials you want, can't you make those yourself?

Basically, why does it need to come from the forums?

*is confused*

I am going to take pictures of the posts and put them in the video.

2011-03-22, 01:22 PM
Cardasy saved my life AND hundreds of dollars on my car insurance. At first, I didn't believe anything the gecko told me, but after drawing my first card, I refinanced my house for cheap, was delivered a pile of purple pills, and found true happiness. Cardasy is healthy, has a delectable crunchy texture, and made me run in slow motion through flowery fields.

Side effects include: Nausea, delusions of not being a geek, vomiting spleen syndrome and death.

2011-03-22, 01:31 PM
The cool kids always mocked me for liking RPGs and card games, but when I showed them Cardasy, rather than making fun of me, they just sat there in stunned silence! Thanks, Cardasy!

Doc Roc
2011-03-22, 01:32 PM
Drink deep of the sorrow-cups, or play Cardasy.
We will come for you in the night on wings of silk and hate.

The Rose Dragon
2011-03-22, 01:36 PM
Today, we play Cardasy, for we know not what tomorrow might bring.

2011-03-22, 01:41 PM
Cardasy is the most fun activity I've ever participated in. Non-Geeks like me actually have very few things we can do without being interesting enough to merit sliding into the Geek category. We can't read fiction, or watch television other than Reality TV (and certainly no My Little Pony), or play board games. And none of us have even heard of a Roleplaying Game, aside from the sexual kind. We can sort of work on cars, but we're not allowed to enjoy it, lest we become some kind of "engineering-geek".

Cardasy circumvents this nicely by being a card game. The standard 52-card deck using games are an ancient non-Geek activity, so long as we don't learn how to play well, as that would sway dangerously towards "math-geek" territory.

So far, the elegantly designed reward cycles and mechanics that acknowledge and support our group's otherwise disparate creative agendas has had my brain injecting me with more dopamine than even friending a hundred strangers on facebook could.

It also cured my gout, enhanced my gender's standard array of genitalia, united me with my long-lost brother, gave me wise investment advice, sowed cruel dissent within the ranks of my enemies, and made me immune to food poisoning and radiation.

2011-03-22, 01:47 PM
Cardasy - you can even play it with GIRLS!

2011-03-22, 01:51 PM
When the Cyborg Time Lords from the FuturePast came for my family, the superconductors on their lightning-pikes crackling, I persuaded them to play a game of Cardasy against me for my family's freedom. And I won!

As they departed in defeat I managed to see our future through their Chronoportal. Though my mind still recoils in terror when I recall the sight of the eldritch horrors waiting to be wrought, I wake up from my nightmares every morning excited to play another game. Thanks, Cardasy!

No brains
2011-03-22, 01:58 PM
Eh, I would say Cardasy is... Okay...

It's not for top notch gamers, but it does require prior experience in this kind of thing to learn. The learning curve can be pretty crooked, but if you persevere you might have something fun to do if you're locked in a small space with a standard deck of cards.

There's plenty of gratuitous violence, explicit sex, and racial slurs, all in the same scenarios. This doesn't undermine its inherent hard-hitting political commentary where every double meaning must be considered in order to fully grasp the human condition.

So if you want to go into a fantasy land where you can make mad libs of human atrocities to the most innocent of creatures to advance your knowledge of sociology Cardasy is for you.

Requires 1-24 players. Influence of drugs or severe brain hemorrhaging suggested. Ages 9 and up. This review doesn't hurt Cardasy as bad as the head of every post telling you this is fake.

The Glyphstone
2011-03-22, 02:01 PM
Cardasy is great! Before I discovered Cardasy, all I had to fill up my free time was sports, working out, and socializing. But now, with Cardasy, I have something to do on Friday nights besides bar-hopping with my friends to meet cute girls. Thanks, Cardasy!

2011-03-22, 02:14 PM
I only found out about Cardasy from this friend who had thought he had heard about a new game someplace. I searched across town, but no pub had heard of the game. I took to the bottle, and lost all hope.

But then, something amazing happened! The maker of cardsay came to me in a dream and gave me a copy of the rules. All my problems were solved, and that is why my rulebook looks like a photocopy.

2011-03-22, 02:21 PM
I was stunned that so much excitement could come in such a small package. When my friends and I sat down in my basement to try Cardasy, I was expecting another run-of-the-mill RPG. Ten minutes into the game, however, I was literally at a party on the moon, being served pâté de foie gras by a trio of buxom cheerleaders while a full band serenaded us with smooth jazz. Thanks to Cardasy, we were invited to be VIPs at the after-party, and were even treated to free drinks (I got two phone numbers at that party. Thanks, Cardasy!).

Further, I am dumbfounded at the depth that the simple system extends to. My UN Diplomat was able to easily keep pace with my friend's Armageddon Death Robot, and we were awestruck at how both solving world hunger and beating up street criminals could be resolved with the same amount of card drawing. What's more, when we needed to look up the rules for tearing out a polar bear's aorta with your teeth, they were right in the book, and even indexed for our convenience!

Since then, I've been playing Cardasy whenever I can. It's even replaced food and water, becoming one of the only things I need to survive! With a few simple draws from the basic Cardasy deck, I cured cancer, enabled myself to subsist on oxygen alone, was elected president, and won the lottery! Here's one guy who can't wait for the expansion set!

The Dark Fiddler
2011-03-22, 03:02 PM
I'm so glad I found Cardasy! I kinda always wanted to get into roleplaying games, but they were always way too nerdy for me. Not so with Cardasy! My friends and I, none of us nerds, play like twice a week now! Our 10 hour sessions are legendary at school, and everybody's always talking about them!

And the game itself is just so amazingly fun! I'm a fifteenth level half-elf half-dragon fire paladin, and I love every minute of it! My foes flee from my +6 Hat of Splendorous Wonder, and even my friends consider themselves too unworthy to be near me when I wear it!

I can't recommend this game enough to anybody who doesn't want to be a nerd, but still wants to try out roleplaying games!

2011-03-22, 03:05 PM
Cardasy - you can even play it with GIRLS!

Girls can play it, even non-geeky ones with no RPG experience.:wink:

2011-03-22, 03:13 PM
Cardasy is friendly for people who aren't nerds - take it from me, a forum poster on a tabletop roleplaying game website!

2011-03-22, 03:16 PM
Cardasy contains 100% of the recommending daily intake of fiber for a growing adult. After only four months on Cardasy, I've lost 40 pounds!

And most of my paycheck, but that's what you get when you buy RPG systems to eat.

2011-03-22, 04:16 PM
My older Brother was the black sheep of the family, he was always spending time playing these wierd games with his friends where they chant and dress up and run around with wooden swords. I picked up Cardasy because I was recommended it by a friend, her son was a cross dressing ninja from outer space but now he's at Harvard studying law. Cheers Cardasy, my Brother is now a brain surgeon!

2011-03-22, 04:22 PM
Personally, I'd re-think the name. Cardasy sounds a bit too much like Card-Ass-y. Or you get Trekkies thinking it's got something to do with Cardassians. Either way. :smallbiggrin:

2011-03-22, 04:41 PM


2011-03-22, 04:49 PM
I would like to make clear that I am not a nerd I am on the football team and am the lead singer in a rock band and i have short hair and i listen to popular music.
and i love cardasy
so do my 8 million groupies!

2011-03-22, 06:12 PM
Cardasy is so awesome, it gave me cardiac arrest, and I liked it!

Magic Myrmidon
2011-03-23, 02:18 AM
This thread- I mean Cardasy is FAAAANTASTIC!

2011-03-23, 03:33 AM
I'd buy that for a dollar!

2011-03-23, 04:02 AM
I bought Cardasy yesterday. Since then, I've won the lottery twice, been elected president of the world by universal acclaim, and have had aliens arrive to tell me how awesome I am. Of course, the friend I was with who refused to buy a copy of Cardasy was killed four times over by freak ninja hailstorms.

2011-03-23, 11:41 AM
This game cured my mother's cancer. We were playing a friendly game of Cardasy, when her head was suffused with a golden light, and the tumor phased through her skull, leaving no trace of its presence. The tumor broke down sobbing, explaining that the beauty of Cardasy had revealed that it was wasting all its energy trying to destroy life when it should be claiming life for itself. The tumor promptly evolved into a woman of indescribable beauty, and we married the next week. I now live in a gorgeous mansion with two beautiful kids, both of whom are the President of the United States. Thanks, Cardasy!

Unfortunately, I cannot recommend the expansion pack. It introduces a disturbing level of power creep to the base game, the additional rules end up being mostly irrelevant, and it caused my wife to revert back into a cancerous tumor.

2011-03-23, 12:12 PM

2011-03-29, 03:36 PM
Cardasy is an innovative new take on the fantasy genre, accessible even to those who don't consider themselves "nerdy" or "geeky." This is in part because the game system is quite easy to learn, with simple, open-ended rules. Also, the "fantasy" in question is largely based on who-would-win scenarios between various superheroes, dinosaurs, international military vehicles, and a couple of token monsters and characters from ancient myth (i.e. the Hydra, the Minotaur, Dragons, Gilgamesh, George Burns, Fenris, and Wadjet).
I recommend the game for anyone with too much free time, and a strong stomach so they can handle the card "art" more than once. The game does not cure bad grammar in 12-year-olds, as promised on the outside packaging, but I'm willing to overlook that in favor of the free stick of boysenberry gum in every pack.

Final score 4.5/5 stars. Fun game, but the art is terrible. Just...terrible.

Incidentally, I give the expansion pack 5/5 stars, not because it enhances the game much but the extra-thick "ubercards" work as wonderful disposable coasters when I host parties.

2011-03-29, 06:11 PM
I am an elf. No, really, I am. And when I played Cardasy for the first time it was so amazing that I grew a great, full beard right there at the gaming table. The dwarf sitting next to me was sooo jealous that I'm never shaving it off.

May a my Mom date a kobold if I'm lying.

2011-03-30, 02:10 AM
I really love Cardasy. I have a lot of friends who never played RPGs before, and didn't think they'd like them. We tried a game of Cardasy and they loved it! The adventure was fast-paced and everybody totally got into it. Now all our friends want to play too!

2011-03-30, 06:50 AM
Whilst wearing my three wolf moon shirt playing Cardasy one day, I was approached by some "chicks" who my non-nerd friends and I described as "mad hot." They were so impressed by my Prehensile Warhammer card that we were immediately whisked away for decades of hedonistic pleasure in an Arabian palace. Unfortunately, a sorcerer got a hold of my Genie of the Lamp card, resulting in some unfortunately whacky hi-jinks. But hey, all's well that ends in a friendly game of Cardasy!

2011-03-30, 07:22 AM
What is Cardasy?

That is a question that is in all our minds these days. Whether we wake or dream, the thought of Cardasy will never let us go. We all play it, whether we have heard the name or not, and yet, we have only lifted the outermost of many veils covering, layer after layer, the sublime beauty and all-encompassing meaning that permeates Cardasy.

We need no longer eat, for Cardasy is our nectar and ambrosia. The pure nourishment of the gods, condensed in our minds from a book of rules. What use are our bodies, now that we have tasted Cardasy.

We need no longer talk, for the language of Cardasy transcends words. It is the essence of reality, beyond the scope of worldly philosophy and simple mathematics to convey, and Cardasy speaks to us in whispers and dreams.

We need no longer see, for the mere sight of the world has faded behind the brilliance of Cardasy's vision. It is a picture, painted in the colours behind colours, the true radiance of unseen dimensions behind the walls of this drifting soap bubble we call reality.

9.5/10, would buy again.

2011-03-30, 07:36 AM
... If you use unedited pictures of the posts, it's going to say "Advertise for my fake RPG" right at the top of every single one of them.

I don't know if I'm stating the obvious, but I feel like I should state it just to be safe.

2011-03-31, 08:35 AM
... If you use unedited pictures of the posts, it's going to say "Advertise for my fake RPG" right at the top of every single one of them.

I don't know if I'm stating the obvious, but I feel like I should state it just to be safe.

Thanks for pointing that out. Just crop them, and it should be good. Its probably overdue, but I had a trip, so maybe I can get it in.

No brains
2011-04-01, 08:07 PM
... If you use unedited pictures of the posts, it's going to say "Advertise for my fake RPG" right at the top of every single one of them.

I don't know if I'm stating the obvious, but I feel like I should state it just to be safe.

Thanks for pointing that out. Just crop them, and it should be good. Its probably overdue, but I had a trip, so maybe I can get it in.

If you look closely, I pointed that out in hard to see LemonChiffon text, so you might want to cut that out too. :)

2011-04-01, 10:09 PM
I Chill with Cardasy!

2011-04-01, 11:20 PM
Is not a man entitled to the roleplay he so deserves?

'No!' says the man in the football jersey, 'It belongs to the nerds.'

'No!' says the man in the game company, 'It belongs to whoever buys my books.'

'No!' says the crazy guy down the street, 'It belongs to the Russian mafia.'

I rejected those answers; instead, I chose something different. I chose the impossible. I chose... Cardasy, a game where the role-player would not fear what others think of him, where the card addict would not be bound by petty flavor text on his pitiful Collectible Card Games, Where the common man would not be constrained by the rules of society! And with the sweat of your brow, Cardasy can become your game as well.

2011-04-01, 11:47 PM
A man chooses... to play Cardasy!
A slave obeys... when I tell him to play Cardasy!