RPG Creation Contest II: Hidden Worlds [Archive] - Giant in the Playground Forums

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-09-30, 10:19 AM

RPG Creation Contest II:
HIDDEN WORLDS

http://t2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSfb1zBgzF-etoV5eqCNXWZe_afWx08WwK0qlI1oQp6jqYocEPNZQ&t=1

"There are more worlds than stars in the sky.
Understand? They are everywhere, big and small, close as your skin. They are everywhere. Some ye can see an’ some ye cannae but there are doors, Tiffan. They might be a hill or a tree or a stone or a turn in the road or they might e’en be a thought in yer heid, but they are there, all aroound ye. You’ll have to learn to see ‘em, because you walk amongst them and dinnae know it. And some of them . . . is poisonous."

From Terry Pratchett's The Wee Free Men

In the RPG Creation Contest, you don't create content for an existing roleplaying game, but a full fledged roleplaying game of your own. It can be as rules-light and simple as you want, so long as it is playable and has a coherent rules set. It can be done in 24 hours (http://www.24hourrpg.com/), so a month should be plenty of time.

This month's theme: alternate fantasy universes that are accessible from our own.

RULES
You will be creating an original RPG with an original premise. It can not use an existing rules set or be based off of any existing media. The setting and rules must be your own.

You must explain the rules. After reading through your game, it must be clear how to play. You can assume that the reader knows basic RPG concepts and has played D&D or something similar.

The entry must be between 2000 and 8000 words. This length is short enough to be readable in a short amount of time, but long enough to sufficiently describe the setting and rules.

The game must have been created for this contest. No submitting creations of other people, or games you have made earlier.

The game must be about a fantasy world, or multiple fantasy worlds, that can be accessed by people in the real world. There will be a different theme next month.

THE CONTEST WILL BE CLOSED AND VOTING WILL BEGIN ON OCTOBER 30TH. GOOD LUCK!

Knaight

2011-09-30, 03:12 PM

Out
There are some who cannot cope with the world. Some plagued by mental ailments, isolated, abused. There are those for whom depression is not just a constant battle, it is a lost one. They've found a way out, into what they believe is their daydreams and their fantasies. They are wrong. What they've found are new, very real worlds, that can only be accessed through them. They can't know that these are real, that would damage them more than anything, but you need to enter them, and for that, the realities have to merge, and the masquerade must be kept.

Enter a game about depression, suicide, and escapism.

AtlanteanTroll

2011-09-30, 03:39 PM

Enter a game about depression, suicide, and escapism.
So every misconception people already have about D&D.

Knaight

2011-09-30, 03:44 PM

So every misconception people already have about D&D.

No. The idea is a serious game, that handles a serious topic. It is intended to make people think, and to get away from problematic cultural portrayals of the topics it addresses. If some self appointed moral guardians get the wrong idea due to an understanding limited to stereotypes, that is their problem. For that matter, said self appointed moral guardians are probably the people who need to play it, as they've consistently demonstrated an understanding of what depression and suicide is that makes the typical five year old look like a paragon of logical analysis.

Hawkfrost000

2011-09-30, 04:16 PM

Does it have to be an "Alternate World" or can it be a more Masquerade like setting?

DM

EccentricCircle

2011-09-30, 04:41 PM

Gosh, you're doing a contest each month.
hmmm, I think i'll sit this one out, once was quite enough!

CarpeGuitarrem

2011-09-30, 04:45 PM

YES. Very much yes. I like this premise, I like it a lot. Count me in. I'll start brewing immediately...

flabort

2011-09-30, 06:16 PM

I'll be following. Again. And again, not likely for me to join, but I'll try to try. :smallwink:

Kazyan

2011-09-30, 10:25 PM

Ooo~ooh.

Is there some sort of official sign-up if I wanted to get into this?

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-09-30, 10:44 PM

Ooo~ooh.

Is there some sort of official sign-up if I wanted to get into this?

No. You just need to post your RPG before the deadline. Preferably in PDF format.

flabort

2011-09-30, 10:58 PM

Stupid PDF format...
Yeah, just saying this, if I do submit anything, it probably won't be in PDF format. That's beyond my computer (it doesn't even have the ability to view PDFs! Unless... maybe if I try a browser other than firefox? IE, maybe? doubt it.).

Yeah, it's getting really glitchy, it's old, and Firefox won't let me log in to several sites anymore. And when I open it up, it automatically switches to "work offline" Every. Single. Time. It's just two clicks to deactivate that, though. It says it failed to initialize the security component of the application when I start firefox up, I think that may be the root of the problems I have.

No ideas yet, but when I do have an idea, I'll see if I can't figure something out. Probably not. I'm not very good at writing :smallsmile: Hint, Hint, to DSKPs.

Knaight

2011-10-01, 07:23 AM

Stupid PDF format...
Yeah, just saying this, if I do submit anything, it probably won't be in PDF format. That's beyond my computer (it doesn't even have the ability to view PDFs! Unless... maybe if I try a browser other than firefox? IE, maybe? doubt it.).

If you email me a .odt or .doc I can send you a .pdf back. Though if you can't read them something is up - Google Docs can handle reading .pdf, as can the free Adobe Reader. If you plan to take me up on this, shoot me a PM.

IcarusWings

2011-10-01, 07:27 AM

Well, I didn't get time to finish my entry for last month, but hopefully I'll do better this time, I've got a concept I like already. Here's a rough prologue:

-----

You want to know what power is? Well, there are some that believe it is found through influence over others, there are some who believe that power is wealth, or force of arms. Some believe that power is knowledge of all things. They are all wrong. Power is found in stories my boy. Stories that grip you so strongly that you don't know what is real and what is not.

There are some tales that are as old as time, that have grown a will of their own. They repeat themselves again and again, creating the entirety of history like a spider weaves its web. They have to be told, they want to be told. They spin worlds of their own in the infinite potential of imagination, and it is easy, so easy, to get lost in them forever. Woe betide you if ever get caught up in one of those stories, son. They care not for the happiness of their characters, for it is tragedy that inspires them, tragedy that gifts them the ability to live on, and it is tragedy that will be your downfall.

Sleep well, my son.

YouLostMe

2011-10-01, 09:56 PM

I probably won't finish in it time (or finish ever), but I'll go ahead and take a mixed dump of all my ideas right here for possible progress in the future.

Twin Worlds
There is the mortal world that we all know and love, filled with cars and computers and people who play Touhou, and then there is a parellel world, which slightly overlaps ours. Its environment and inhabitants are more extreme, almost engineered to their specific places of dominion. Occasionally, this parellel world overlaps with our own, bringing pieces of the environment and occasionally new critters on over.

The more civilized of these creatures come and go from our world on missions or to build their own societies. Their presence is minute, but constant in our world, and their work remains almost entirely ignored by most of mankind.

Races
There are three overarching types of civilized creatures, the ones that PCs can play. They are ogres, salamanders, and fey.

Ogres: Ogres are usually durable beings. According to much common stereotype, they're ugly, but in reality most ogre traits don't include barf-colored skin or twisted faces. Ogres are constitued by troglodytes, giants, and goblins.

Salamanders: Salamanders tend to be quick creatures. Their physical appearance is almost ridiculously variable. Salamanders are constitued by dragons, wurms, and fiends.

Fey: The fey are usually highly aware. Most inhabit forests, and look most humanoid at a glance--closer inspection actually reveals that fey bodies constantly shift in color, texture, and shape. They fey are constituted by gnomes, ents, and trolls.

Howler Dagger

2011-10-01, 10:05 PM

Will there be a banner for this one? Anyway, i think ill take a stab at this again:

In 2031, scientists developed the Hubble Inter-dimensional Telescope (HIDS). It could look into the fabric of the universe and sense the most basic information on other ealities. One thing unexpected that they found is that our world isnt the "prime world", which other worlds are fashioned from. Eeach dimension had a "gimick". Our worlds gimmick is unknown, theories range from "what if the planets was populated with lazy, fat, violent morons" to ""What if God's chosen people lived on earth". The first dimension, and the last, tohat they opened up a portal to was the Perfect dimension, where all living beings lived in harmony, and there was no violence or pain.

Humanity did not like what they saw. It was the perfect world, and it did not have humans. It was an insult from the universe, it was saying that a perfect land lacked humans. Of course, humanity's first instinct was to destroy it. But they discovered one of what are now the Three Laws of the Perfect Alternate Dimension (TLPAD): No being shall feel pain or be hurt in anyway or form. And they thus could not be hurt there. Warfare failed, and now only liscensed proffesionaled are allowed to enter.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-01, 10:19 PM

Will there be a banner for this one?

Yes. As soon as I feel like making one.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-03, 12:46 PM

I created a banner for this month's contest. I thought the last one was a little big, so I made this one smaller and more subtle.

http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/640/bannerimage.jpg (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=217189)

Copy-able code:

http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/640/bannerimage.jpg (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=217189)

Knaight

2011-10-08, 06:26 PM

I'm dropping this for now, as my perfectionist streak kicked in a bit too much for me to finish. I may be able to do something which is far less serious and touches on far fewer concepts of actual importance, but no promises.

Also, we still need more voting for RPG Creation Contest I.

Lord Loss

2011-10-11, 03:51 PM

Travel Yonder (Title Tentative)

There's a place out there, just out of reach, behind that grove of trees you've never entered, or in that classroom you never thought to look in. It's all around you. Waiting for you. Beckoning to you. But you'll never each it. It'll always be there, just out of reach, taunting you.

Unless...

Unless you're willing to pay the price. To throw away your heart's desire, to cast away your life, to break all the bonds tying you to our world. To gamble your life away, probably to eke out a miserable existance, all for a glimpse. A glimpse of things as they really are, for a glimpse of magic, a glimpse of impossibility. A glimpse of the Yonder.

EDIT: Expanded on the idea

Yonder is a strange place made up of the hopes, dreams and memories of everyone. Important icons, ideals, places and people are personified in Yonder, appearing under the same light as their public image, following the most common stereotypes that are attributed to them. Sometimes, more than one version of a person might appear in yonder, if there are two or more major perspectives upon them (e.g a man seen as a tyrant by some and a hero by others). Important figures of the past and present spontaneously appear in Yonder alongside fictional beings such as gods, creatures of folklore and urban legends. Finally, the people who make their way into Yonder on purpose or by mistake also exist there.

Came up with another idea, working on that. See below for details.

BarroomBard

2011-10-11, 03:55 PM

I've been having a little trouble coming up with an idea I want to pursue, but if I can think of something in the next few days, I'll toss my hat in as well.

If only so there are more than two games to vote on :smallbiggrin:

EDIT: Ok, I think I've got it:

The Meek Shall Inherit

You're a kid. And you suck. You're kinda fat, or you're a four-eyes, or you're a girl (and thus have cooties). You have to deal with thuggish bullies, cruel teachers, merciless coaches, and parents who would rather go to the office than to your baseball game. The only thing that makes life bearable is the Gang, your collection of misfits and oddballs who are each as much of a loser as you are.

And then you get the Call. Hidden behind the mundane world, there is another. A world of magic, faeries, goblins, and adventure. And they need help. Unfortunately, all they got... is you.
-----
"The Meek Shall Inherit" is a game about kids learning to overcome their weaknesses and along the way, maybe rescue a maiden or two.

CarpeGuitarrem

2011-10-12, 12:03 PM

Okay, I'm hoping to get this entry in, but here's the elevator pitch for what I'm planning, just to tease you all.

Andersen Shadow
Your father, and your father's father, have passed down legends of strange things in this world, of times when there was life on its surface, fresh air above the Ceiling, when the sun did not rain death down upon humanity. Down here in the Crypts, humanity preserves legends of a great man, a hero, Andersen, and the world that followed him.

A world of fish-women, faithful toy soldiers, and a pale white woman encased in a castle of ice...this is the world that Andersen saw. It is a world of wonder, a world of magic, and the tales of humanity keep it alive. It is also whispered that, for those who can kindle the spark of wonder in their hearts, passage to that world is possible.

It is a new world, a young world. Does it deserve to meet this broken, battered world?

Bearpunch

2011-10-13, 11:41 AM

Monsters in the Closet.

It is really hard to sleep with those eyes peeping at you from the darkest corner of your room, isn't it? I can imagine, it must be tough. Your parents, your friends, they don't believe you. But I do. I know what you are seeing, because I can see you right now...

Monsters do exist. No, really. They do. In their own seperate world, they thrive. In their own sealed off section of the universe, they remain, beasts beyond description, as mad as they are huge. The problem is, sometimes worlds collide...

Life as a kid is really hard. Life as a kid is even harder growing up seeing eyes poking at you from your closet. Talk about traumatizing. So traumatizing, even, that your parents thought that you had a mental problem, so they sent you to Nightlights Sanitarium. The monsters still come to see you though, but now they get mean...

I am planning on having a rules-light more storytelling focused system, featuring plot hooks for both playing as kids and adults, as well as some form of bestiary. Basic stuff, really.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-13, 01:32 PM

Monsters in the Closet.

Monsters do exist. No, really. They do. In their own seperate world, they thrive. In their own sealed off section of the universe, they remain, beasts beyond description, as mad as they are huge. The problem is, sometimes worlds collide...

Life as a kid is really hard. Life as a kid is even harder growing up seeing eyes poking at you from your closet. Talk about traumatizing. So traumatizing, even, that your parents thought that you had a mental problem, so they sent you to Nightlights Sanitarium. The monsters still come to see you though, but now they get mean...

I am planning on having a rules-light more storytelling focused system, featuring plot hooks for both playing as kids and adults, as well as some form of bestiary. Basic stuff, really.

Sounds quite fun. If I ever play, I will drench the closet in gasoline and totrch it instead of opening it.

Bearpunch

2011-10-13, 01:38 PM

Sounds quite fun. If I ever play, I will drench the closet in gasoline and totrch it instead of opening it.

Good idea. You win! :smallbiggrin:

Kazyan

2011-10-13, 06:35 PM

Two more sections and a transferring from notebook to page, and the basics will be done. This is the only non-lame way I can describe it:

Abstraction
It’s not really a secret, but it’s not commonly known. After someone becomes a mathematician, it’s assumed they know: the universe isn’t done yet. The immutable, perfect laws of reality are, to put it simply, in beta testing. So what happens when you find a bug? You end up breaking the system in a very specific way: rifts in the fabric of reality, leading to pockets of space. Don’t leave the rifts undestroyed too long, or they start changing. Structures appear gradually, and then after a few days, you see people inside. Strange people. Human-like, but surely not homo sapiens. And if you’ve broken reality hard enough, you’ll see things you won’t even recognize as humanoid.

The reason you haven’t heard of any this? You have to use the right words after you discover something new. Quod erat demonstrandum.

Noctis Vigil

2011-10-15, 02:21 AM

Oh man, a topic I love. If I had any experience and could write worth crap, I would enter this. Since I don't and can't, I look forward to seeing what you all come up with. "The Meek Shall Inherit" will almost indefinitely see use by me when finished, if I can find people who want to play in my gamer circle. "Abstraction" would interest some of my friends, I'm certain.

Ninjadeadbeard

2011-10-15, 02:44 AM

RULES
You will be creating an original RPG with an original premise. It can not use an existing rules set or be based off of any existing media. The setting and rules must be your own.

And I was hoping I could finally make that Thomas Covenant RPG...:smallcool:

Oh well, let's see if I can finish something to enter this time.

akma

2011-10-15, 04:54 AM

I doubt I`ll finish this in time, but this is the concept:

Lost hopes, dreams and potential

People have hopes. People have dreams. People have potential.
But most of it isn`t fullfilled – people lose hope, people give up on dreams, people don`t live up to their potential.
But all those hopes and dreams are not lost – they are fullfilled in other worlds. For every lost hope, dream or potential, a spirit is created.

Recently, the spirits came to a realization – if the human that is the source of them is murdered, they die too. This escalated their wars, and many came to our world – some to protact, some to murder.

The team of players could play spirits created from the same person, making sure he doesn`t live up to his potential and make sure his dreams won`t come true, as that would destroy them, and possibly making humans of their enemies fullfill their potential and make their dreams come true.
They would be sort of protacting angels that would keep the person alive but also make sure the person life won`t be fullfilling.

Alternatively, the players could play humans that will find out about the secret war on their life. About the spirits that protact them, and seek to keep their life unfulfiling. They could also try to go to the other worlds – how would a world filled with spirits of lost hopes would look like? How would a human fare there?

Lord Loss

2011-10-15, 07:37 AM

Title Pending

I came up with a better idea for my RPG. Instead of the original idea I posted (Travel Yonder), I'm going to go with something a little more Steampunk. I don't have a title for it just yet, but here's the idea for it:

Children are being taken in the night by creatures called the Snatchers, taken to a horrible factory presided over by demons and terrible clockwork creatures. There they are forced to slave away, until they too begin to resemble their mechanical overlords, until they too lose their free will, their identity, their self, and become just another cog in the machine.

flabort

2011-10-15, 12:23 PM

Hmmm... sounds like a melding of the first part of The Golden Compass, (The Snatchers, sound like the Gobblers before you find out what they really are), and part of Pirates of the Caribbean, movies 2 & 3.
And steam-punk, and sweatshops.

And is the PCs role as a rescuer, as a servant, or as an overlord? Or a Snatcher, maybe?
Sounds fun, by the way.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-16, 03:09 PM

Snatcher would be the most fun.

Bearpunch

2011-10-16, 08:43 PM

Regarding when the contest closes, can we submit ON October 30th?

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-16, 11:43 PM

Regarding when the contest closes, can we submit ON October 30th?

I wouldn't, because it ends whenever I get around to closing it on October 30th. You can, however, submit until then.

BarroomBard

2011-10-17, 11:33 AM

And I was hoping I could finally make that Thomas Covenant RPG...:smallcool:

Oh well, let's see if I can finish something to enter this time.

Just file off the serial numbers, I'm sure no one will notice :smallwink:

BarroomBard

2011-10-20, 11:12 PM

How's everyone's games coming, then?

Also, just another plug to go over and vote in the first contest: voting ends on the 30th and we have a three way tie!

Bearpunch

2011-10-21, 05:58 AM

Could be going better, but I feel its alright. Considering it is my first rpg, It will probably end up like doodoo, but it's worth a shot. Might be able to playtest it tonight.

Kazyan

2011-10-21, 07:43 AM

Uh...

1. Notebook. Rewriting everything. Fgsfds.
2. Notebooks do not have word counts. I accidentally a few thousand words over the limit, probably.
3. There are still mechanics I have to write out.
4. Seriously, how do I pare down all this fluff?
5. Editing.

But seriously, I'll try to finish, but no guarantees.

CarpeGuitarrem

2011-10-21, 12:16 PM

Erk. I've not really made much progress at all. If I haven't started or gotten along something substantial soon, I'm gonna drop out.

Kazyan

2011-10-23, 09:12 PM

*sigh* When I said I wrote a few thousand words over the limit, I was right, if by "a few" you mean "over nine".

A lot of stuff is gone, but I'm close to finished. I'll post Abstraction within a few days. I'll follow, but sit out on, the next contest. NaNoWriMo, after all, and 8000 words could go better to a terrible book than a terrible RPG. :smalltongue:

BarroomBard

2011-10-24, 02:22 PM

Gralamin

2011-10-24, 10:51 PM

I wish I saw this sooner. I have some ideas floating around. If I can manage to get something done in a couple of days, I'll enter something.

Kazyan

2011-10-25, 11:16 PM

It's probably a mistake to not obsessively comb over each line of text checking for errors and typos until the last possible day to submit, but I'm excited. And wordy. Can't forget wordy.

Abstraction (https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B8CtsA87dvQUZTUzNDVlZTMtMGZlNy00M2JkLWFmO WUtMGQ2ZGNmMmMzZWMy)

First person to find an error gets to smack me with a mop.

Kazyan

2011-10-30, 02:50 PM

The contest closes today, unless Twilight Muse changed something. Everyone, get your entries in. I've been looking forward to The Meek Shall Inherit and the one with Snatchers.

Bearpunch

2011-10-30, 07:44 PM

Yeah, mines not near done. Life punched me in the face and I've been busy... sorry guys, I thought I could do it...

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-30, 11:43 PM

Sorry. Never got around to closing the contest. I will tomorrow,

BarroomBard

2011-10-31, 12:45 AM

The Meek Shall Inherit will be up by about 2pm US Central time tomorrow. It's been a busy week for me :smalleek:

Besides, I couldn't let Abstractions run away without any competition...

BarroomBard

2011-10-31, 01:35 PM

The Meek Shall Inherit (https://docs.google.com/open?id=0B4OmL20pGIyzOTJlYjc1ZTYtZDlhOC00OTAyLTk4M zMtNGE2YmUyMTZmYzM4)

Inspiration for this game came from The Neverending Story, The Dungeons and Dragons Cartoon, The Warriors of Virtue, and such.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-31, 02:27 PM

Contest closed. Since there is only one entry, Barroom Bard wins by default. The sweetest kind of victory.

IcarusWings

2011-10-31, 03:03 PM

Contest closed. Since there is only one entry, Barroom Bard wins by default. The sweetest kind of victory.

What about Abstraction?

BarroomBard

2011-10-31, 04:01 PM

Yep, two entries:

Kazyan's Abstraction (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=12100382&postcount=42)
and
BarroomBard's The Meek Shall Inherit (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=12133904&postcount=47)

EccentricCircle

2011-10-31, 05:16 PM

ooh, they both look good. I shall have to read through them in detail at the weekend.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-31, 08:21 PM

I have to leave for a party right now. I will post the voting thread when I get back.

abk108

2011-10-31, 09:49 PM

Abstraction is interesting indeed, but it requires deep mathematical knowledge, and I'm not sure I grasp its qualities as maybe I should. It seems very serious stuff, and seems too complex for me.

Meek Shall Inherit is a game based on a wonderful premise (having negative attributes saying how bad you are at something... genius!), and really makes me wanna try it. It is simple straightforward and lighthearted

My vote shall be for MEEK SHALL INHERIT

BarroomBard

2011-10-31, 11:15 PM

Meek Shall Inherit is a game based on a wonderful premise (having negative attributes saying how bad you are at something... genius!)

Thanks. :smallredface:

It came to me mostly because roll-under systems are super simple, but I don't like the cognitive dissonance of lower numbers being better. Plus, I was re-reading The Land of Og at the time, so games about PCs who suck was on my mind.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-10-31, 11:24 PM

This thread will be used for voting! The next contest will be up tomorrow.

I vote for Abstraction.

Abstraction: 2 votes.
The Meek Shall Inherit: 3 votes.

BarroomBard

2011-11-01, 11:44 AM

Since there are only two entries, I won't vote, but it was fun doing mini reviews for the other contest.

Abstraction: This game is really neat. It has a lot of features that are unique (higher-order math as the setting) or at least innovative (the coin flipping base mechanic), without being weird for the sake of being weird.

I had a few minor problems with it. The way the rules are laid out was a little haphazard: concepts would be mentioned in the rules before they were introduced and explained. That could easily be fixed by moving the basic mechanic section to before the races section. In addition, although the world is very imaginative and fleshed out, there is no hook. Fermat's Pyramid exists as an organization, but what does it do? Why would the PCs support or oppose it? What, exactly, do you do in this game? I'm a firm believer that any game, especially ones with more high minded concepts than "there's a monster, kill it" absolutely needs a metaplot to help get stories going.

All told, though: I was probably going to vote for Abstraction if any other games were made.

IcarusWings

2011-11-01, 01:05 PM

First person to find an error gets to smack me with a mop.

I think this sentence is missing an 'is' and a noun or something similar: "For the first five days, the realm inside—~2.5 miles across—develops structures a lot like our cities."

Now where's my mop? :smallwink:

On a less jovial note, I'm working my way through both of them now. And do you remember how I've always been really quick to come up with an idea for these contests, and never submit anything? Because I have, and it's pissed me off. So while I'm probably never going to get anything in by a deadline, I'm going to be developing the ones I never completed and will probably post them here sometime.

Chainsaw Hobbit

2011-11-01, 02:35 PM

The next contest is up (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?p=12140351#post12140351). This one has a special twist, so read the rules carefully. The word count limit is also 3000 higher this time.

Kazyan

2011-11-01, 04:00 PM

@abk108: Thanks for the feedback! It helps to hear when things aren't clear to the reader; those details get lost during the writing process.

@BarroomBard: Thanks to you too. Good concrit, by the way. Again, you've helped point out what wasn't clear. I don't have much to say about the suggestion for a hook other than "you're right; forgive me, master".

And now for the review of your RPG, The Meek Shall Inherit.

The stat system jumps out as groundbreaking. A quantity for how much you suck is the perfect way to fix the roll-under system's ambiguity, and it's such a violation of conventioal stat systems that you have to just sit there and wonder why you didn't come up with it yourself--mayhaps mere mortals are not that creative.

The game and setting are so light-hearted that it's hard to dislike anything (seriously, if you put this stuff next to a WoD book, it would turn into Kitten: the Meowing or something), and that's a welcome change to modern RPGs. I particularly like the section on THE WIZARD (Lightning Bolts) and the inventive monsters. Croctopi. Lovely.

I can't just gush endlessly, so, criticism. The plot structure is good for a GM to run the game, but it's unusually restrictive. It wouldn't be good for anything long-term or one-shot, which puts the game length in an awkward place. It's not that a plot couldn't be fun, but it would be harder to make. The system for obstacles is unclear at first read--it would be better if you gave an example. I understand how to roll Clumsy for a generic task, but how would you evaluate the results when trying to run up the plastic slide at recess?

If we ignore the minor mechanical traps, which should be easy when you get into the spirit of the game, the fluff really shines. It's all consistent, with an atmosphere something like Wizard of Oz. You can not be in a bad mood when reading all this--much less playing it, I'd imagine.

Well worth the wait. I'll refrain from voting as you did, but if I had to, I'd vote for this over Abstraction.

@Icaruswings: If you take out the em dashes, the sentence reads just fine. I think.

Noctis Vigil

2011-11-01, 11:32 PM

This was much smaller than expected. Only two. But that makes it way easier to decide.

Abstraction: It's interesting. I don't think I would play it, however; the rules are worded in somewhat confusing ways in places, and the game itself seems very very complicated.

The Meek Shall Inherit: I...Wow. This is not only beautifully written, clearly explained, imaginative, fun and simple, but more, I relate to it. I was the fat geek with glasses in school that everybody teased, and I can't tell you how many hours I spent daydreaming of magical worlds I could escape to. I got into D&D because of this stuff. You have made something beautiful; I will be saving this file to try and convince others to play with me later. If you decide to try playing this in an RP thread or somewhere else online, please PM me. I would love to join you. :smallsmile:

There's no question in my mind: I vote The Meek Shall Inherit.

abk108

2011-11-02, 06:37 AM

Thanks. :smallredface:

It came to me mostly because roll-under systems are super simple, but I don't like the cognitive dissonance of lower numbers being better. Plus, I was re-reading The Land of Og at the time, so games about PCs who suck was on my mind.

Yeah, I've seen that as the main positive aspect of the game :)

In my post-apocalyptic homebrew game, I wanted to do something similarly while still keeping the idea that "higher stat is better". That game had static DCs, so I managed that with "success thresholds", a number that, based on your stat, you had to beat (over) on a d20. It's like knowing you have a +4, you need 16 to score 20.

BTW, I have a couple of suggestions: what if the players supplied a (particularly ugly, geeky, weird) photo of their youth, so as to play with themselves (no pun intended) ?? That'd be cool! Like, the player of the fat kid with glasses used to be one, so he can impersonate it better than anybody!

And what if you turned some of this in a horror-ish story, IT style?

EccentricCircle

2011-11-10, 12:12 PM

Its taken me a while to get around to reading and reviewing the games but here goes!

Abstraction:
the Pros: This is fascinating. The idea of the hidden world within mathematics is great and I like the idea of the higher order beings who all percieve the world differently. I enjoy abstract games and this looks like it would be an intriguing world to explore.
the cons: the rules aren't layed out very clearly. I found it very hard to get a grip on how one goes about playing the game. Your explanations of some of the mathematical ideas was excellent, its always nice to see good science teaching! but alas I didn't feel that your explanation of the way the game worked was handled as well.
the world is intrigueing, but I didn't see many hooks. are you meant to play mathematicians exploring this world. or beings from the higher orders? it looks like its designed to support both, but some guidance on how to build an Abstraction campaign would have been nice. describe the factions in detail, what they want who they are. etc.
Would I play it? Possibly. it looks like a fun game and I'd enjoy exploring the world. but nothing jumps out and makes me want to run a game next time I have a spare session.

The Meek Shall Inherit
The Pros: This game looks really fun. I like the way the real and Magical/imagined worlds are juxtaposed. the childish elements lend the right amount of unreality to it. it reminded me a lot of Only You Can Save Mankind, by Terry Pratchet, where you are left wondering to what extent the sci fi elements are real and to what extent they are imagined.

The Cons this could have done with more explanation in places. I would have liked the fantasy world to be better defined. with more detail on the races and factions. I can kind of see why you didn't put this detail in, as leaving it as a set of sugestions gives it more of a childish fantasy feel. but it doesn't give the DM that much to work with.
The way the rules work was reasonably clear, but I wasn't certian on how the monster stats worked. this might have just been from not reading it thorougly enough though.
would I play it? Yes. it would make a great one shot. though I don't know it could support an entire long running campaign.

My vote is for The Meek Shall Inherit. with Abstraction in a very close place. They are both very well written and a really enjoyable read well done both!