Question about Love in Writing

[Vella_Malachite]

Hey guys. Just wondering, for someone with more experience in these things: I'm writing a book in which a fourteen-year-old girl and a fifteen-year-old boy are dating. There's a scene where they kiss.

Now, I'm having a bit of trouble describing this. The kiss itself is fine, but since I myself didn't kiss anyone until I was sixteen, and given it wasn't a very...uh...involved relationship and I'm unnecessarily clinical anyway, I'm not entirely sure what the general reaction from participants in such situations is. I've been told to play up the giddy "can't focus on anything else" thing immediately afterwards, but it was supposed to be quite an awkward experience, so I'm not sure how much to emphasise that, because it might give the wrong impression. Also, at this point I'm thinking that they aren't going to stay together; they're just not quite as into the whole thing as they think they are.

If it's any help, the POV character is the girl.

Thanks in advance for the help!

[Savannah]

I can't really advise without reading the scene, sorry. (I'm also not 100% clear on what exactly you're asking...)

[Sir_Chivalry]

My first kiss, I spent fifteen minutes sitting on a bench with the girl I was out on a date with. We had bought some ice cream. Fifteen minutes of sitting there and staring at my shoes, wanting to kiss her. I asked if I could, and she told me that would be okay. I ended up kissing her nose, on account of closing my eyes out of fear. You could have decapitated me right there and I'd have been fine with you doing it, I was that mortified. First kisses aren't always magical or spectacular. If the two characters are both anticipating it, they're probably afraid as well as excited. If only one knows it's going to happen, the other is probably going to react badly.

[Kaytara]

I would like to direct you to the forums of NaNoWriMo (http://www.nanowrimo.org/en/forums) (National Novel-Writing Month, from November 1st to November 30th). Even though it's not started yet, it's perfect for questions such as these. You could try posting an excerpt of your scene there and getting comments. The community there is great.

[Vella_Malachite]

Thanks. I'll check out those forums.

Basically, they both know what's about to happen and all that. My buildup is fine, I think, it's just that I've done the 'after' bit wrong. Basically, my question is, how do two young people fairly in love and chock-full of hormones feel right after kissing someone for the first time?

[Kaytara]

Nervous giggling, grinning like idiots, unable to look each other in the eyes without laughing stupidly? Nervous blabbering?

[Oppolo]

Honestly, it'll depend entirely on your characters. Think about their traits, and how they'd react to an unusual situation.

Maybe they're nervous they've done it wrong, they're terrified of what the other person might be thinking right now.
Maybe they're so confident that they're just sat there waiting for the other person to say 'wow'.
Maybe they're so overwhelmed by emotion that they're the one who feels a bit dizzy over the rush, and they say 'wow'?
Maybe they come off as confident, but they're really a bit insecure. They went in confidently, but now they're worried it might have gone terribly wrong, since it was a first kiss. That's the kind of situation for nervous laughter, waiting for some re-assurance.
Is there an obviously dominant partner? One who likes to take care of the other? They'll probably lead the next action.

Think of your own experiences, they're not that unusual. First times are generally not great news, people are too nervous about things going badly. Even if it goes well, you have no scope for comparison, so you don't know if it's gone well! Only REALLY confident teenagers would stare lovingly into each others eyes, knowing that all was well.

[Vella_Malachite]

Thanks again for the suggestions. I'll have another look at the scene, and I'll do some rewriting with those in mind.

[dehro]

I ended up kissing her nose, on account of closing my eyes out of fear..

don't. ever. do. that. again.

I literally fell off my chair laughing, coughing and out of breath..which was kinda hard to explain seeing as I also was on the phone with a customer (yay for multitasking)..

so..yeah..sorry for making fun of your childhood memories..but you may very well have cost me a customer, just now.

that said..my reaction to your post bears a remarkably close resemblance to my reaction to my own first kiss.. or at least to the panicky build-up to it.

[Sir_Chivalry]

don't. ever. do. that. again.

I literally fell off my chair laughing, coughing and out of breath..which was kinda hard to explain seeing as I also was on the phone with a customer (yay for multitasking)..

so..yeah..sorry for making fun of your childhood memories..but you may very well have cost me a customer, just now.

that said..my reaction to your post bears a remarkably close resemblance to my reaction to my own first kiss.. or at least to the panicky build-up to it.

No no, these memories are there to be mocked.

[Tyndmyr]

Love scenes, much like horror, are all about the anticipation and the build up. A awkward scene? GREAT! Consider the million and one thing running through her head. The possibilities, the uncertainties, the questions, the wildly inappropriate and hilarious thoughts...

It's not nearly so much about the (probably uncreative) action as it is everything surrounding the action.