Three 1st level spells you'd choose for yourself

[Tenno Seremel]

Let's suppose you are as you now in this world had an unearthly insight of sorts. You gain ability to cast three 1st level spells/powers at will as a spell/psi-like ability (caster/manifester level 1). They all must be from the same base class. Homebrew spells/powers are fine too. You gain no feats or class features.

What would you choose?

Personally I'd choose Psionic Charm, Project item (custom Telepathy version of the Call Item power from Mind's eye) and Aspect (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=11607670&postcount=7).

[Tyndmyr]

Wait, does xp exist too?

Power word pain, floating disk, comprehend languages.

[Tenno Seremel]

Wait, does xp exist too?

Let's suppose it does, but you don't know how much you have.

EDIT: I wonder… can Comprehend languages be used to read from a PC as you need to touch creature or writing.

[sonofzeal]

What's my caster level? And are we limited to any particular list?



1) Improvisation if my CL's high, Weildskill otherwise. Be good at anything!
2) Clairaudience/Clairvoyance (off the Trapsmith list in Dungeonscape). The number of uses just boggles.
3) Lesser Vigor. Magical healing in general would be great IRL, and this is the easiest way.

[Tenno Seremel]

What's my caster level? And are we limited to any particular list?

Caster level 1, any list as long as all spells belong to the same base class. I've written that actually :}

[Xiander]

I would go with:

Charm person
Major image
Dimension door

[Tenno Seremel]

I would go with:

Charm person
Major image
Dimension door

Only Charm person is first level here, unless I'm missing something.

[sonofzeal]

Caster level 1, any list as long as all spells belong to the same base class. I've written that actually :}
Ah, missed that. And that makes the choice much harder.


I guess I'll go for Weildskill, Lesser Vigor, and Silent Image - all are (potentially) 1st lvl Cleric spells.

[Xiander]

Only Charm person is first level here, unless I'm missing something.

You are right, i had not understood that it had to be 1st level spells.
In that case:

Charm person
comprehend languages
Summon monster 1

because Badgers are fun

[Gandariel]

Let's see....
Charm person
Enlarge person
and...
why not, Good Old Magic Missile!

[lorddrake]

Sanctuary, cause fear and command (Cleric)

or

Unseen servant, sleep and disguise self (bard)

And I wouldn't have morals with powers...

EDIT: (wizard/sorcerer) color spray, charm person and ray of enfeeblement

[Tenno Seremel]

Summon monster 1

because Badgers are fun

Too bad Summon monster 1 lasts only 1 round at CL1 (^ ^)

[Randomguy]

If I chose from the wizard list, I'd choose unseen servant (I'd never have to clean or cook again!), comprehend languages and endure elements.
Though disguise self, feather fall and expedious retreat came close.

If I chose from the cleric list, I'd pick cure light wounds, delay disease and comprehend languages. It would be the most selfless thing to do, I suppose, since I'd be using the powers to help others instead of for my own gain.

[Xiander]

Too bad Summon monster 1 lasts only 1 round at CL1 (^ ^)

One round of badger, is better than no badger at all :smallbiggrin:

[Eldan]

Was scholar's touch level 1? I think so.

Scholar's touch, comprehend languages, charm person.

[sonofzeal]

Was scholar's touch level 1? I think so.
Indeed it was. Shame on me for forgetting that!


Weildskill, Lesser Vigor, and Scholar's Touch then.

[legomaster00156]

Bard (I would choose this list!)
Charm Person: Good utility spell. Those thugs are now your friends for one minute HOUR - plenty of time to call the police and have them arrest the guys.
Cure Light Wounds: I like to be capable of healing myself.
Sleep: The average person is 1 HD and has a crappy Will save.

Cleric
Cure Light Wounds: I like to be capable of healing myself.
Endure Elements: "What? Aren't these shorts uncomfortable in temperatures below freezing? Of course not!"
Bless Water: "Behold! Holy water!"

Druid
Cure Light Wounds: I like to be capable of healing myself.
Endure Elements: "What? Aren't these shorts uncomfortable in temperatures below freezing? Of course not!"
Longstrider: Because running fast is always cool.

Paladin
Create Water: Hey, it's useful.
Cure Light Wounds: I like to be capable of healing myself.
Endure Elements: "What? Aren't these shorts uncomfortable in temperatures below freezing? Of course not!"

Ranger (I would never choose this list!)
Alarm: Warding an hour for two hours at any distance? Sure, why not?
Animal Messenger: Eh... it could be useful.
Longstrider: Because running fast is always cool.

Sorcerer/Wizard
Charm Person: Good utility spell. Those thugs are now your friends for one minute HOUR - plenty of time to call the police and have them arrest the guys.
Sleep: The average person is 1 HD and has a crappy Will save.
Silent Image: This one is purely for fun.

[Tenno Seremel]

Charm is popular, I see :}

EDIT: BTW it is 1 hour/level so 1 hour actually.

[Gwendol]

(Bard) Grease, Silent image, Charm person

(Cleric): CLW, Obscuring mist, Bless

[legomaster00156]

Yes, Charm Person is popular. Why? Because it has so much utility in the modern, sociological world.

[Necroticplague]

Detect poison (because i have people who hate me, and am paranoid)
Synesthete (because I'm skeptical and know my senses can be fooled, so I'd like to have redundancies in place)
Control Object (because of versatility)

[sonofzeal]

Yes, Charm Person is popular. Why? Because it has so much utility in the modern, sociological world.
I've never been a fan of Save Negates spells. I'm too much of a pessimist I guess. I always like to hedge my bets and/or never give enemies a chance to roll in the first place.

[DarkEternal]

Scholar's touch---Reading and understanding a book in six seconds? I could be a master of all fields, ever.

Comprehend languages---awesome in today's world. Touch your computer, and you understand everything. If you could use it with Scholar's touch, it becomes tenfold better, since what really hurts it here is that it would last for ten minutes before I was an idiot again. But if I were to put hundreds of books on whatever e-reader you have, cast Scholar's touch, and Comprehend languages, I could pretty much read anything that wasn't translated in languages I know.

Vigor/Cure Light wounds...considering that first level commoners have between 4 and ten health, I would be a damn saviour with this spell.

[elvengunner69]

Detect poison (because i have people who hate me, and am paranoid)
Synesthete (because I'm skeptical and know my senses can be fooled, so I'd like to have redundancies in place)
Control Object (because of versatility)

I think anyone with an ex-wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/lover/husband should probably take this one :smallbiggrin:

I'd totally be a Druid and choose these...

Magic Stone (because I like throwing things)
Entangle (easier to hit something if they can't move)
Good Berry (healing one berry at a time...)

[Skaven]

Cure Light Wounds
Restoration: Lesser
Endure Elements

[ArlEammon]

Cure Light Wounds
Comprehend Languages
Summon Monster I

All from the Cleric Spell list!
I"d make a fortune as a translater!

[Cruiser1]

No healing ability. That would require you to personally visit every injured person. After you miraculously heal people, the government wants to dissect you to see what makes you tick, not to mention religious fanatics either want to follow you as the next messiah or assassinate you as a false prophet. You want abilities that are powerful, yet invisible and can't be traced back to you. Therefore choose the following from the Sor/Wiz list. They allow you to either pursue a life of altruistic philanthropy or conquer the world, depending on your alignment:

Charm Person: Indeed very powerful in today's social world. Start a successful career in politics. :)
Unseen Servant: Since it's at will, you can have 100's of these in a few minutes, which last for an hour. Since they're invisible, they can't be traced back to you. Countless uses! Start a successful magician's career. :)
Scholar's Touch: Knowledge is power, and power is wealth. Start a successful career in almost anything. :)

[Delcor]

Endure Elements
Scholars Touch
Charm Person
:smallsmile:

[elvengunner69]

No healing ability. That would require you to personally visit every injured person. After you miraculously heal people, the government wants to dissect you to see what makes you tick, not to mention religious fanatics either want to follow you as the next messiah or assassinate you as a false prophet. You want abilities that are powerful, yet invisible and can't be traced back to you. Therefore choose the following from the Sor/Wiz list. They allow you to either pursue a life of altruistic philanthropy or conquer the world, depending on your alignment:


Why you use the berries I mentioned above with a disclaimer that these statements have not been endorsed by the FDA :biggrin:

[tcrudisi]

Charm Person - I'd use this to take over the world.
Silent Image - Too many good uses for this spell.
Comprehend Languages - because it's a lot harder to take over the world if people can communicate without me understanding what they are saying.

/edit - Where is Scholar's Touch located? I have never heard of that spell, though it looks really tempting.

[ericgrau]

I would take long duration basic things I could use every day. Because something spectacular once in a blue moon is actually rather meh. Especially if I was afraid of being discovered. Charm person, oddly enough, makes enemies in the long run.

Unseen servant: I'm surprised everyone didn't select this one. Lasts an hour. My room is clean, food prepared (well, once a day anyway, but it'd be a pretty good meal) and any other boring tasks completed.

Endure Elements: Considering how reliant I am on my A/C to get anything done. Most of all because it's 24 hours, so I can use it and forget it. And conversely keeping warm is one of the basic human needs, so it would make survival just about anywhere pretty easy. Heck I could sleep on benches without caring, and besides random hassling I could save on rent in a pinch, or otherwise make traveling a lot less worrisome.

The 3rd spell is the hard one. Comprehend languages seems the most practical to modern life, but considering how uncommon it is to need it in the U.S., that you have to touch the subject and how easy it is to get text translation, it seems unlikely to get much use. If I wasn't afraid of being discovered I'd get expeditious retreat to get around, moving 1/2 mile in 1 minute. Perhaps swapping endure elements for jump to get over intersections. Disguise self would be the easiest way to walk around a corner and disappear, but not actually that useful unless planning a life of crime. Feather fall likewise seems like a cool but uncommon way to get around.

[Fax Celestis]

Comprehend Languages, Amanuensis, and Prestidigitation.

Fear the mighty translator.

[Augmental]

Expeditious Retreat, because I'm impatient and this spell could help me get to places faster.
Floating Disk, because it can carry my stuff without me having to do anything for an hour.
Unseen Servant, to cut down on the number of times I have to get up from my computer.

[Bard for Kicks]

Manipulator (my favorite):

Comprehend Languages
Charm
Tenser's Floating Disk (Going on vacation? Bags too heavy for ya?)

or

Enlarge/Reduce Person
Mount (I would LOVE to march through the streets of New York on a horse)
Unseen Servant

or

Comprehend Languages
Scholar's Touch
Obscuring Mist

[Amphetryon]

Druid Spell List:

Healthful Rest: Heal people, one good night's sleep at a time.

Cloudburst: Drought? What drought? Fire? What fire?

Surefooted Stride:. . . says the clumsy gamer-guy.

[Tenno Seremel]

Charm person, oddly enough, makes enemies in the long run.

If you don't spam it to become friends with all living things and reap huge benefits from it to boot you should be fine, I think (^ ^) Just remember it's not a domination and if, for example, you borrow some money… friends or not they'll want them back later.

[Zaq]

Looks like most of the good ones have been pointed out. I'd be all about Scholar's Touch (pretty sure you don't get D&D fans who don't enjoy reading on some level), Comprehend Languages (what can I say? I love languages), and Endure Elements (I live in Arizona. There are many days when I would pay rather handsomely to be comfortable in, oh, 118 °F heat).

[ericgrau]

Oh man scholar's touch would make so many classes that much easier. Or reading up on something outside of class. Well, figured out my missing 3rd spell.

[Hunter Killer]

Trapsmith List: Clairaudience, Fox's Cunning, Gaseous Form.

Not really a base class... These are all Level 1 spells on its list, though! Sneak into places, solve really hard problems, and hear things from a safe distance. It's perfect for making a not-so-legal living.

Wizard List: Comprehend Languages, Prestidigitation, Scholar's Touch

Read and comprehend anything with a side of Pocket Wish. Sure, Presti can't do everything, but there is a lot it can do. It's like getting a dozen powers in one.

[Zaq]

Yeah, Prestidigitation is definitely in my top five or six spells, but it doesn't really have much functional effect that I can't do myself. Sure, being able to say "no, the bathroom is spotless now" in a couple minutes is pretty neat, but it's nothing compared to "I can read this entire book in six seconds," "I can suddenly understand Romanian," or "I can friggin' sleep even when it's friggin' August."

Still a damn cool spell, but there's a lot of competition at the top.

[Silverlich]

Psionic Major Creation, Vigor, and Astral Construct

[ericgrau]

Sure, being able to say "no, the bathroom is spotless now" in a couple minutes is pretty neat
34 minutes to be precise, or about 10 minutes if you only clean the floor, sink, toilet and tub. So it's not even that special for that. The 1 square foot per round limit is a pain.

[Draz74]

/edit - Where is Scholar's Touch located? I have never heard of that spell, though it looks really tempting.

Races of Destiny. And it would absolutely be my #1 choice. For the other two ... lots of good options, but I think I'd go with Prestidigitation as one of them. Message is another cantrip that would actually be pretty tempting (being able to whisper across the room in a boring meeting = win).

[Vemynal]

Definitely comprehend languages, I'm terrible at them.

Scholar's touch would be incredibly useful as well.

Charm person

[Zaq]

34 minutes to be precise, or about 10 minutes if you only clean the floor, sink, toilet and tub. So it's not even that special for that. The 1 square foot per round limit is a pain.

Compared to the 20-30 minutes it usually takes to clean the tub anyway (and that's just a basic scrub, not a "make it spotless for the Queen" scenario), we're still coming out ahead.

The real benefit is that it doesn't matter how filthy the toilet bowl is. Even if ten minutes of scrubbing with Clorox doesn't make more than the tiniest dent, one round with Prestidigitation (per square foot) will get it sparkling and spotless. If you're just wiping down the counter, sure, hand me a paper towel. If you want to get rid of that off-color patch that's been slowly spreading no matter what harsh chemicals you spray on it, Prestidigitation would be much easier. Let's not even get into the fact that you don't have to touch whatever you're cleaning, which is a big bonus in some cases.

That, and you could use it just as the day went on to keep your clothes looking nice (spilled your lunch? No you didn't), make a clean place to sit (yes, it's a city bus stop in the heart of town, but there will be nothing sticky there in a few seconds), or whatever. Just for the cleaning purposes alone, it's still useful in ways that mundane elbow grease isn't. This is, of course, ignoring all the other functions it has.

It still doesn't make my top three, but it's probably in my top five.

[Mnemnosyne]

Psionic minor creation, psionic charm, and...probably vigor. Not sure on the third. (As for the limit of them all having to be from the same class, an Erudite can get those all at 1st level by trading away both his bonus feat and his psicrystal bonus feat away for two favored disciplines, because of the wording in the psicrystal description stating that it is a bonus feat, not a class ability).

Charm would of course get me connections which are so important in the real world. Bend the ear of the right people to sell my ideas, get cushy jobs, etc, etc.

Edit: I'm less sure about psionic minor creation now too, as I thought of some major drawbacks for my intended use, but it's still an excellent ability. Given more thought I might consider a different spell list, perhaps cleric or wizard, since this was the main reason I picked psionics.

Vigor I'm not totally sure on, but it would be nice because since it's at will, I'd always have 5 temporary hit points, and in real world terms, 5 hit points is a lot. It means shrugging off a solid hit from a longsword, or more damage than can possibly be caused by a dagger except on a crit, so I'd be pretty much immune to unarmed damage and be hard to kill even if someone came at me with weapons.

[Geigan]

Any 1st level spells?

Lesser Vigor
Silent Image
and either comprehend languages or haste(thank you trapsmith:smallbiggrin:)

[DonDuckie]

What about spells per day?

Cleric:
Cure light wound
Purefy Food and Drink
Mending

Druid:
Charm animal
Cure light wounds
Produce flame

Sor/Wiz:
Magic missile
Silent image
Unseen servant

But if I'm anything IRL like when I'm playing, I'd most likely regret my choices :)

[Kosjsjach]

Man, scholar's touch is popular. It was one of my choices when I read the title, but it's a bit overwhelming to see how many people agree with me.

My choices: scholar's touch, comprehend languages, and a toss-up between silent image, unseen servant, endure elements, or lesser vigor (if I'm going the cleric route).

Picking up any book in any language and understanding everything in it in 6 seconds would be hella-cool, and I'm pretty sure I don't have the Int or Wis to reliably pull off an effective charm person.

[Alaris]

I gotta agree with several people here; you want powers/abilities that can't be traced back to you. Government/Religions are going to want some words with you if you start magically healing people.

Honestly, I wouldn't want to get involved in politics, or major world stuff, even if I had magic. Taking some inspiration from several people here, and using the sub-rule of "Homebrew Spells allowed," I'd go with the following.

Scholar's Touch: Easily become a master of many skills. I'd likely use this to become versed in those pesky computer languages, instantly being able to read the books that explain them. I would be able to become an IT person very quickly. Also, college would be a breeze, if I bothered with it.

Comprehend Languages: Ah... you can get many jobs being able to understand any language. Taking from what people have said above, all you need to do is carry an E-Reader with stuff in various languages, and cast it using that. You might not be able to speak it, but you can sure understand it.

Improved Prestidigitation (HOMEBREW): Take a dash of prestidigitation, and increase it's power to be appropriate for a 1st Level Spell. The ultimate utility spell, now with 100% more utility. What can't you do?

[FearlessGnome]

Scholar's touch, because obvious gold is gold.

Comprehend languages, because neat.

Explosive ru- Aaw, wrong level. Charm Person, then. not very original, but hard to beat.

Fun spells that wouldn't be optimal, but amusing to consider:
Cheat: Clean out a casino and/or get your knee caps broken. Two attempts for every game of chance shifts the odds by quite a margin. And if they catch you cheating, well... The cameras didn't. What are they going to say? You used magic?
Faith Healing. ALL shall be converted to the worship of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.
Enlarge Person. Freaking out is the only reasonable response.

[Mnemnosyne]

Keep in mind the abilities are at-will. It doesn't matter if they're reliable or not, everybody rolls a 1 sooner or later, so if you're trying to land a charm every 6 seconds, you will, soon enough. And given how useful friends are in today's world... Want a job, charm the interviewer (but you still have to convince him you can DO the job well), want an opportunity to pitch your idea, charm the person and they'll at least listen, etc. It means that at least, you can get people to listen to you and give you a chance, something that is often the real stumbling block between being able to do something and not.

As for me, after giving it additional thought, I think my previous answers would be totally tossed. I'd probably go with Charm Person, Scholar's Touch, and probably Cure Light Wounds (Lesser Vigor might be more efficient, but since they're at will, immediate throughput is better than efficiency).

I'll also note that I feel as though Comprehend Languages is kind of wasteful if you have Scholar's Touch, because if you read a book and absorb the knowledge within, just pick up a book that teaches the language you want to understand. Additionally, depending on your interpretation of the wording, Scholar's Touch also lets you absorb the knowledge of books you couldn't normally read ("as if you had just read it" - if you're illiterate in that language you would be incapable of reading it, but the spell bypasses that and surmises that the reading was automatically successful).

[Tenno Seremel]

Cheat: Clean out a casino and/or get your knee caps broken. Two attempts for every game of chance shifts the odds by quite a margin. And if they catch you cheating, well... The cameras didn't. What are they going to say? You used magic?

They'll cheat too, if mechanically possible. Also, you'd better study which games are actually games of chance as slot machine, for example, can have a programming that says "no wins until X is stored inside and no more than Y per win". Besides, RNG is not necessary random :}

[Viktyr Gehrig]

Charm person, cure light wounds and either scholar's touch or comprehend languages, from the Bard or Witch list. Really, just like I would do if XP were real.

[Wings of Peace]

My choices?

Scholar's Touch: Finish learning the required material for my college degree in days if not hours!

Comprehend Languages: Tell all those exotically attractive foreign students about the things I've learned and how if they 'come over to my place' I can tutor them!

Prestidigitation No coed roommate or exotic foreign student to cook for me? No problem! With a clap of my hands that sh*tty ramen I bought from the campus store now tastes good enough to warrant a five Michelin star rating (because only losers lacking Prestidigitation settle for three stars).

No money? No problem! Using my powers of turbo-ramen-reflavorization I can pay the bills by opening a small noodle cart in the middle of campus. No one will ever suspect that my ramen (and the source of their malnutrition induced Scurvey) is the same stuff they pay $.99 for only a few feet away.

[Seharvepernfan]

Comprehend languages doesn't let you speak any new languages, so it's not as useful as people probably think. I can't really think of what I personally could gain from charm person, it's a temporary effect, and I wouldn't want to make a friend by forcing it on them.

Without a doubt, my first choice would be cure light wounds. I don't need to explain that.

After that, it's a battle between true shot, nerveskitter, expeditious retreat, and feather fall.

[FearlessGnome]

They'll cheat too, if mechanically possible. Also, you'd better study which games are actually games of chance as slot machine, for example, can have a programming that says "no wins until X is stored inside and no more than Y per win". Besides, RNG is not necessary random :}

Ah, but if it is not a game of pure chance, the spell fails. They might change the odds, but you'll notice soon enough, and as long as you are free to leave and play something/somewhere else, the odds of not making a fortune are slim.

Hell, be the bank eventually.

Cheat: Make money.
Charm Person: Get into politics. You don't need campaign contributions, but you do need people to put your name forward every now and then. And even if someone dislikes you, you can change that for an hour. (And if you don't abuse their temporary friendship, they won't necessarily dislike you just because they realise they don't know you as well as they thought they did.)
Scolar's touch: Actually be good at politics. Know how the economy works. Know about that foreign country the reporters are pestering you about. Know the ideologies that are supposed to be at the roots of it all. READ PLATO. Seriously, just go read philosophy. Will do wonders for your perspective on things.

Comprehend Languages may be a bit overrated, as people have pointed out. Cool, though.

[Necroticplague]

My only regret about scholar's touch is that it specifies a book or scroll, so you can't use it to read the whole internet in six seconds. Although all my pdf are e-books, so maybe it could still work...I could finally grasp GURPS Vehicles!

[FearlessGnome]

I'd jokingly suggest printing the internet, but of course you'd run out of all the colours that make up human flesh before ever you ran out of black for letters.

Edit: Shield and Mage Armor would be fun. Not as useful as one might want, though, because an AC of 18 would still let through one bullet in ten.

[Elfin]

Scholar's touch, obviously. Reading one book every six seconds would allow me to amass incredible amounts of knowledge.

Charm person is too good to avoid.

The last one's a tough choice. Prestidigitation would be immeasurably useful, and so would at-will unseen servant, so it'd probably come down to one of those two. On the other hand, jump and expeditious retreat would both be gobs of fun.

[Volthawk]

My only regret about scholar's touch is that it specifies a book or scroll, so you can't use it to read the whole internet in six seconds. Although all my pdf are e-books, so maybe it could still work...I could finally grasp GURPS Vehicles!

To be honest, I wouldn't want to read the entire internet. Some things on the internet are not the kind of things you want to read.

[Victoria]

I would definitely pick from the Sorcerer/Wizard spell list. The following three:

Charm Person - Self-explanatory from the rest of the thread. Too good to pass up.

Comprehend Languages - A big one for me personally since languages are my passion. Doesn't give me the ability to speak or write them, but I imagine that in practical use, being able to understand them all perfectly would be extremely useful for learning the more conventional way.

Sleep - So I can use it on my insomniac self and voluntarily fail the save.

[Othesemo]

Let's see...

Scholar's Touch- Be twice as pretentious with none of the work!
Expeditious Retreat- I actually considered Jump for a second, but this one is much better. It has the same duration as Jump, but it gives a +12 bonus to jump checks (due to increased speed), which is better than the bonus granted by jump, and it would let me outrun anyone.
Cure Light Wounds- Healing 5.5 damage each round at will? That's more than the typical level 1 commoner even has. I can cure just about every injury I'll ever suffer with a thought.

Close contenders include Prestidigitation and Unseen Servant, but I figured that utility should outweigh convenience.

[Maroon]

I'm not messing with people's heads, so I won't pick charm person, but I'll take disguise self, pass without trace and expeditious retreat. So I could enter sprinting competitions without people knowing it was me, of course.

[Wings of Peace]

Comprehend languages doesn't let you speak any new languages, so it's not as useful as people probably think.

Actually, more to the point with this, while reading foreign signs and understanding what cashiers are saying to me would be helpful, I could also just Scholar's Touch a handful of dictionaries and language manuals.

That said, I'm going to replace my choice of Comprehend Languages with Disguise Self. Sure the spell only lasts ten minutes per casting, but how long does it take to walk through a door? :smallamused:

[NNescio]

To be honest, I wouldn't want to read the entire internet. Some things on the internet are not the kind of things you want to read.

On a tangential note, how much Wis damage would a person suffer after using Scholar Touch on /b/?

[BillyBobJoe]

On a tangential note, how much Wis damage would a person suffer after using Scholar Touch on /b/?

All of the wis damage. AAAALLLL of it.

[Incanur]

My choices come from the bard list: cure light wounds, swift invisibility, and scholar's touch. Swift invisibility plus at-will uses equals win.

If wanted to be a cat burglar, I'd instead opt for the following spells from the trapsmith list: clairaudience/clairvoyance, knock, and gaseous form.

Mount to spam the world with horses would be an amusing pick. If you activated the spell-like ability each round, you could have a constant herd of 1,200 horses surrounding you or out causing trouble.

[Dr.Epic]

Charm Person
Comprehend Languages
Magic Missile

[Rogue Shadows]

Charm person and sleep. What I take after that depends on whether or not I can take a 0-level spell.

If yes, prestidigitation
If no, a custom spell that is prestidigitation but re-balanced for a 1st-level spell.

[Geigan]

On a tangential note, how much Wis damage would a person suffer after using Scholar Touch on /b/?

http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/2748/cirnobsod2.jpg

[Rubik]

Oh, man. Scholar's Touch is looking REALLY awesome right about now.

BUT, if that didn't exist, I'd likely go with:

A. Disguise Self (the changeling version). I look and feel like another person. I'm sure I could make tons and tons of money with this alone. Not to mention the awesome things it could do to my sex life.

B. Charm Person. Duh.

C. (If Scholar's Touch isn't available for some reason) Cheat. Go find some games of chance, Cheat the hell out of them, and use A & B when things eventually go south.

[Incanur]

The more I think about it, the better disguise self seems. Silent image (or minor image via gnome illusionist shenanigans) is also stupidly good. I think I'd choose one of those over swift invisibility.

[Rubik]

Ooh. Mending. "We can fix your quality watch within 1 hour, guaranteed."

Why not "1 minute," you say? Well, people will get suspicious if you do it that fast.

Go through word of mouth. Spread among the uber-rich and charge ludicrous prices.

[Zaq]

Actually, more to the point with this, while reading foreign signs and understanding what cashiers are saying to me would be helpful, I could also just Scholar's Touch a handful of dictionaries and language manuals.


Go read through a (foreign) dictionary and tell me how well you suddenly understand the grammar of the language.

Alternatively, go take a textbook (101 level, even) for a language you've never studied, read it through completely once (but without practicing it or anything), and tell me how well you speak your new tongue.

Languages are tricky to learn. There's so much more to them than just vocab and phrases. Scholar's Touch just won't cut it for learning a new language. It'll help, but it's nowhere near the same as Comprehend Languages.

[Amphetryon]

Go read through a (foreign) dictionary and tell me how well you suddenly understand the grammar of the language.

Alternatively, go take a textbook (101 level, even) for a language you've never studied, read it through completely once (but without practicing it or anything), and tell me how well you speak your new tongue.

Languages are tricky to learn. There's so much more to them than just vocab and phrases. Scholar's Touch just won't cut it for learning a new language. It'll help, but it's nowhere near the same as Comprehend Languages.

Depends on the dictionary; I have a dictionary on the shelves here that includes guidelines for grammar and word order for English.

[Zaq]

Depends on the dictionary; I have a dictionary on the shelves here that includes guidelines for grammar and word order for English.

And while reading it through completely once (or even two or three times, I'd argue) might let a native speaker of, let's say, French or Russian sound a little more natural, it wouldn't be enough for them to learn the language.

As I said, it'd help, no doubt about that. But I disagree with the premise that Scholar's Touch = instant languages.

[Amphetryon]

And while reading it through completely once (or even two or three times, I'd argue) might let a native speaker of, let's say, French or Russian sound a little more natural, it wouldn't be enough for them to learn the language.

As I said, it'd help, no doubt about that. But I disagree with the premise that Scholar's Touch = instant languages.
At that point, we'd be quibbling over how we parse the meaning of "understanding", I think.

[Mnemnosyne]

True for one book, but what if we were to pick up several dozen different books each teaching the language? It would essentially be the same information, but presented in different ways so that understanding all the books would be likely to give a much better understanding of the language. That said, it would still take time and effort after obtaining the basic understanding, but at least you'd also be able to speak your new language, unlike with Comprehend Languages.

[Narsis]

i'm sure there's some combination of 3 level 1 spells that would grant immortality. i just have yet to find it...

[ericgrau]

Probably something involving a bonus to knowledge checks and Pazuzu.

[Drolyt]

This is actually pretty hard... if Sorcerer/Wizard, then probably Charm Person, Disguise Self, and Unseen Servant. Although the first two only really have nongood applications... if Cleric, then Cure Light Wounds and... hmm, maybe I should look outside the PHB, Clerics don't seem to have much. Druids are better, Cure Light Wounds (or maybe the lowest level vigor spell), Speak With Animals, and Charm Animal. I think I'd stick with Sorcerer/Wizard, and try not to be evil...

[Incanur]

Now I'm sad I don't actually have three such powers. :smallfrown:

[Wyntonian]

Just for the heck of being different:

True Strike: Make any shot ever. NBA, here I come. Throw in Enlarge Person for the greatest basketball player ever. Now, If only I actually liked basketball.

Chill Touch: Make people weaker, or damn near kill them with a touch or three. 1d6 damage is like being stabbed with a shortsword, a couple slaps and they're down.

Cause Fear: Someone tries to mug you? Make them poo themselves. Or, go to Hollywood and become the greatest horror movie actor of all time.

[Madara]

Artificer Infusions(Do they count?)
-Skill Enhancement
-Weapon Augmentation, Personal
-Resistance Item(That will help with fortitude for disease and such)

Wizard spells
-Magecraft
-CHARM PERSON :smallsmile:
- Prestidigitation(its 0-level, can I have two 0s equal one 1st?)
-(Message)

[Tenno Seremel]

Artificer Infusions(Do they count?)
I'm not quite familiar with them. Well, why not :}

[Adrayll]

Gonna have to go with:

Charm Person
Scholar's Touch
Unseen Servant


Does anyone have the exact text of Scholar's Touch? If it actually states that the caster understands what they read, that could counter the books-about-languages issue.

[OldFart]

Cleric (w/ Balance & Gluttony domains)

Goodberry
Make Whole
Scholar's Touch

Proceed to "win" Peace Corps.

[Draz74]

And while reading it through completely once (or even two or three times, I'd argue) might let a native speaker of, let's say, French or Russian sound a little more natural, it wouldn't be enough for them to learn the language.

As I said, it'd help, no doubt about that. But I disagree with the premise that Scholar's Touch = instant languages.

I don't think anyone was saying that it would be instant. It would still be hard work to learn new languages. And lots of practice. But it would be a lot quicker and easier for someone with Scholar's Touch than for a normal person with no magic.

Actually, I suspect the way Scholar's Touch would help you learn new languages the most would have nothing to do with dictionaries or grammar textbooks.

Instead, pick any book that would have a lot of good vocabulary in it -- like a Harry Potter novel or something -- and read it, first in your native language, then immediately in the language you're trying to learn. This basic method was a BIG part of my process of learning Russian (after I understood enough of the alphabet to at least sound words out). Right when I started learning Russian, I did it with the Book of Mormon, then later with other books, up to and including Harry Potter. Since I was already familiar with the books in question in English, I learned a LOT of words (especially valuable cognates) through a comparison process. But for me, the process could take weeks or months; with Scholar's Touch, it would take twelve seconds. Envy.

In other news, I've decided I would definitely take Prestidigitation along with Scholar's Touch. Would be worth it just for being able to scrub the bathroom while I'm sitting on the porcelain throne. For my third spell ... I'm thinking Wieldskill beats out any of the others I'd been considering (Charm Person, Unseen Servant, Message, Expeditious Retreat).

So:

Scholar's Touch
Prestidigitation
Wieldskill

[Yahzi]

If you could take Scholar's Touch and learn a lot of philosophy, the first thing you would learn is that Charm Person is the moral equivalent of lying while holding a gun to someone's head. Not only are you lying, but they don't have the free will necessary to disbelieve.

There are only a few obvious choices:

Cure Light Wounds - because then you could save people that modern medicine can't. Bleeding out is still a common cause of death, especially during surgery. CLW automatically stabilizes people. Heck, Cure Minor Wounds is just as good.

Know Alignment - because there is no other way in our technology to determine who is and who is not a sociopath. Psychologists can guess, but DA lets you know. (Or if you're using 3.5, Detect Evil).

Magic Weapon - if you expect any other aspects of D&D to manifest. Being able to defeat Shadows - when no one else on Earth can - might be important.

Otherwise, Prestidigitation or Mage Hand would be cool. to prove that you had real magic powers. Or Disguise Self, if you're really paranoid. But whatever you choose, choose something that no one else on Earth can do. Magic Missile, Comprehend Languages, Unseen Servant - you can buy all of those abilities with the huge piles of cash you get from saving people's lives.

[Viktyr Gehrig]

Comprehend languages doesn't let you speak any new languages, so it's not as useful as people probably think.

Not on its own. But you can read the desired language, type your desired reply on Google translate, and instantly understand any translation errors.

[lorddrake]

I would trade all powers for iron heart surge!

[Careless]

Cure Light Wounds
Detect Undead (I like to prepare for the coming zombie apocalypse)
Inflict Light Wounds (I assume the zombies aren't animated by negative energy)
But if I could trade a level one spell for 2 uses of a level 0, I'd have to go sorcerer and take a lot of disrupt undead.

[Tyndmyr]

Go read through a (foreign) dictionary and tell me how well you suddenly understand the grammar of the language.

Alternatively, go take a textbook (101 level, even) for a language you've never studied, read it through completely once (but without practicing it or anything), and tell me how well you speak your new tongue.

Languages are tricky to learn. There's so much more to them than just vocab and phrases. Scholar's Touch just won't cut it for learning a new language. It'll help, but it's nowhere near the same as Comprehend Languages.

I would agree. That's why you read the entire foreign language section of the library, one language at a time. And by library, I mean library of congress. I feel like after reading a few dozen textbooks on a topic, it'll start making sense. Sure, I'll have to order the topics logically to work my way up and what not, but a day in the library would result in vast amounts of new skills and knowledge.

Alternative selection: True Strike, Expeditious Retreat, and Feather Fall. Go forth, and buy an assault rifle. You are now the ultimate action hero.

[graeylin]

presti, even as a level 0...

one of the main drawbacks of Presti is that it cannot duplicate the effects of any other spell. And, since in this world, there would be only two other spells in existence, that definitely opens up the range of what it can suddenly do.

It no longer has that huge, nasty limiter.

[Elfinor]

For a little while I didn't realise you meant SLA/PLA, it would be kinda awkward if you actually had to go through the component issue.

I spent far longer than was healthy looking at options:smalltongue:

I'd pick Psion (Telepath) powers:
Mind Thrust
Psionic Charm
Conceal Thoughts

[KainelWyst]

Wizard. Core.

And with these spells I would become a professional, high profile thief.

Woot.

-Feather Fall

-Disguise Self

-Charm Person

Edit: Or just think... Base Jumping from the Eiffel Tower. Delayed Feather Fall. They should've scrapped Delayed Blast Fireball as the bad idea it was, however cinematic, and made the Delayed option a metamagic feat with no uppage of spell level.