person29
2011-12-08, 08:02 PM
Alright so I was reminiscing with a long time friend and dnder about some of the hilarious escapades from when we played in college at a gaming store so decided to start a thread dedicated to these awesome stories.
My friend and I were desperate for a game because our DM at college was a jerk that didn't DM for us because he was too busy playing MTG online and miniatures, so we go to our local gaming store and join in a group there.
We are super excited, there is a steady DM with a group of 4 consistent players with one or two that come in and out.
We are starting at 7th level and roll up stats...the stats are so horrible we would never ever make a player use them in either of our campaigns but we keep them cause the DM was hardcore like that.
One of the other players informed us we rolled at the bad stats table (the one the game was played at), we instead should have rolled stats at the other table (in the back dark corner of the store) where the DM never watches you roll stats at, and you miraculously have 3 18s...but they are legitimate because he said so
So we make half-orc brothers, my friend a monk because his stats were so bad there was no way the monk would be functional and I was a fighter, well because i had terrible stats and wanted to be "functional". My friend had one piece of equipment...a handaxe...level 7 monk was given a handaxe as his only piece of gear from the DM. I had banded mail, a longsword and a light steel shield...all non magical, non-masterwork
The party now consists of an incarnum multi-classed abuser. He had one level in an incarnum class, i cant remember which one, and therefore was able to have numerous shapes and melds that he could switch each round by changing around his one or two points of incarnum he invested...yeah he was awesome...same player that informed us we rolled at the wrong table. He shall be known as Roy
A ranger/rogue who used everything available to him. After we killed some type of large reptilian creature he took numerous hours skinning it, then using the scales to create some type of cloak or armor and harvesting the natural poisons of the creature to add awesome poison damage to his weapons. He shall be known as Little Joe
A big dumb fighter played by the slightly mentally challenged player...who was by far the most fun to play with in this group, also known as Big Joe
A 60+ year old gentleman who played a young vivacious buxom elven wench who dual wielded shortswords and was a total slut. He did so while drooling and grinning while describing her actions. No idea what his name was...I tried desperately to end my nightmares of him
A druid who came to about half the sessions. He was a freemason and a nice dude but he would finger his ring frequently, which made me think he was up to nefarious things. His name was Kevin.
And my friend Mike and myself.
So no healer...we had healing potions (well except me and Mike)
And of course the DM who always referred to himself as GameMaster.
Travis by name
He had homemade encounter tables for EVERYTHING and would roll them ALL THE TIME.
Example: You are walking in the desert. "everyone give me a percentile roll to see how many buttes and plateaus are visible"
..."Give me another percentile roll for shrubberry"
A few spot and listen checks later
"Everyone give me a percentile roll for encounter chance"
And NOTHING is worse than rolling for 10+ minutes for a possible encounter to not have any
except...
when out of nowhere an advanced bulette attacks in cohesion with ant lions and a pteradactyl and you are equipped with...a handaxe
So as the pteradactyl flies past the party, Mike's monk throws the handaxe at the pterydactyl....missing, and losing the handaxe a mile down the ravine it landed in, which we just learned was there.
After combat my character decides to retrieve this piece of loot for his brother and begins to climb down the ravine...no ropes attached. I fall over 1000 feet and live because Travis rolled...you guessed it, a percentile die to see if i lived or died.
Roy also used his airstep sandles and pegasus cloak to jump across the ravines, even if they were 100 feet wide.
We then spent the next three sessions fighting only vermin, which was awesome for the ranger who had vermin favored enemy (it also helped his ability in skinning and crafting with vermin shells)
until the end boss...a crystalline troll druid which we killed in one round when Mike and I went out in a blaze of glory by grappling it and jumping into a lava pit with it...killing ourselves and the troll
Needless to say we bought our DM a rare magic card and miniature for our DM so he would play with us again
What's your story?
My friend and I were desperate for a game because our DM at college was a jerk that didn't DM for us because he was too busy playing MTG online and miniatures, so we go to our local gaming store and join in a group there.
We are super excited, there is a steady DM with a group of 4 consistent players with one or two that come in and out.
We are starting at 7th level and roll up stats...the stats are so horrible we would never ever make a player use them in either of our campaigns but we keep them cause the DM was hardcore like that.
One of the other players informed us we rolled at the bad stats table (the one the game was played at), we instead should have rolled stats at the other table (in the back dark corner of the store) where the DM never watches you roll stats at, and you miraculously have 3 18s...but they are legitimate because he said so
So we make half-orc brothers, my friend a monk because his stats were so bad there was no way the monk would be functional and I was a fighter, well because i had terrible stats and wanted to be "functional". My friend had one piece of equipment...a handaxe...level 7 monk was given a handaxe as his only piece of gear from the DM. I had banded mail, a longsword and a light steel shield...all non magical, non-masterwork
The party now consists of an incarnum multi-classed abuser. He had one level in an incarnum class, i cant remember which one, and therefore was able to have numerous shapes and melds that he could switch each round by changing around his one or two points of incarnum he invested...yeah he was awesome...same player that informed us we rolled at the wrong table. He shall be known as Roy
A ranger/rogue who used everything available to him. After we killed some type of large reptilian creature he took numerous hours skinning it, then using the scales to create some type of cloak or armor and harvesting the natural poisons of the creature to add awesome poison damage to his weapons. He shall be known as Little Joe
A big dumb fighter played by the slightly mentally challenged player...who was by far the most fun to play with in this group, also known as Big Joe
A 60+ year old gentleman who played a young vivacious buxom elven wench who dual wielded shortswords and was a total slut. He did so while drooling and grinning while describing her actions. No idea what his name was...I tried desperately to end my nightmares of him
A druid who came to about half the sessions. He was a freemason and a nice dude but he would finger his ring frequently, which made me think he was up to nefarious things. His name was Kevin.
And my friend Mike and myself.
So no healer...we had healing potions (well except me and Mike)
And of course the DM who always referred to himself as GameMaster.
Travis by name
He had homemade encounter tables for EVERYTHING and would roll them ALL THE TIME.
Example: You are walking in the desert. "everyone give me a percentile roll to see how many buttes and plateaus are visible"
..."Give me another percentile roll for shrubberry"
A few spot and listen checks later
"Everyone give me a percentile roll for encounter chance"
And NOTHING is worse than rolling for 10+ minutes for a possible encounter to not have any
except...
when out of nowhere an advanced bulette attacks in cohesion with ant lions and a pteradactyl and you are equipped with...a handaxe
So as the pteradactyl flies past the party, Mike's monk throws the handaxe at the pterydactyl....missing, and losing the handaxe a mile down the ravine it landed in, which we just learned was there.
After combat my character decides to retrieve this piece of loot for his brother and begins to climb down the ravine...no ropes attached. I fall over 1000 feet and live because Travis rolled...you guessed it, a percentile die to see if i lived or died.
Roy also used his airstep sandles and pegasus cloak to jump across the ravines, even if they were 100 feet wide.
We then spent the next three sessions fighting only vermin, which was awesome for the ranger who had vermin favored enemy (it also helped his ability in skinning and crafting with vermin shells)
until the end boss...a crystalline troll druid which we killed in one round when Mike and I went out in a blaze of glory by grappling it and jumping into a lava pit with it...killing ourselves and the troll
Needless to say we bought our DM a rare magic card and miniature for our DM so he would play with us again
What's your story?