The Epic Salmon?

[TravelLog]

So I've heard talk about a group of people on Gamefaqs who realized that by RAW, a D&D salmon can't swim upstream, so they put template after template on it until it could not only swim up them, it consumed them.

Anyway, I want to see this monstrosity, but can't find it.

Can anyone help?

[Ravens_cry]

Well, gaming stories are like fish stories, they grow in the telling, but given some absurd template stacking I have seen, it would not surprise me.

[Keld Denar]

Epic Pseudonatural (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/epic/monsters/pseudonaturalCreature.htm)? (not to be confused with non-epic Pseudonatural in Complete Arcane)

[DoctorGlock]

MM2 I think had the giant creature template, automatically set the HD to 15 and made it gargantuan. Might be a good place to start.

[Zale]

Give it the Winged Template.

No need to swim up a river if you can just fly over it! :smallbiggrin:

Found this (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5058794&postcount=43).

Not exactly detailed, but google hath given it to me.

[Skelengar]

Give it the Winged Template.

No need to swim up a river if you can just fly over it! :smallbiggrin:

Found this (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5058794&postcount=43).

Not exactly detailed, but google hath given it to me.

Indecently, the thread that post is from is hilarious.

[Ravens_cry]

This Salmon needs a better name than 'Epic Salmon'. It needs something geekier, like The Salmon of Doubt.
As in, I doubt you'll survive this.

[Fouredged Sword]

They looked for strength boosting templates. I think in the end it was some half red dragon giant monstrosity of an elder god salmon fit to terrorize a dwarven fortress.

[CTrees]

Giant Space Salmon of Ill Omen?

[Mr.Bookworm]

Sounds like the dorfish carp.

Hm.

Salmon

Tiny Animal (Aquatic)
Hit Dice: ½d8 (2 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. swim
Armor Class: 13 (+1 Dex, +2 size), 13 touch, 12 flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-10
Attack: Tail slap +3 melee (1d4-4)
Full Attack: Tail slap +3 melee (1d4-4)
Space/Reach: 2½ ft./0 ft
Special Attacks: –
Special Qualities:
Saves: Fort +2, Ref +3, Will +1
Abilities Str 3, Dex 13, Con 10, Int 1, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills: Swim +11
Feats: Weapon Finesse (B)
Environment: Aquatic
Organization: Solitary or school (8-64)
Challenge Rating: 1/6
Treasure: None
Alignment: True Neutral
Advancement: 1-3 HD (Tiny)
Level Adjustment: –

Skills

The salmon receives a +10 racial bonus on Swim checks.

The Salmon of Hate
Advanced Fiendish Paragon Pseudonatural Salmon

Tiny Outsider (Aquatic, Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 40d8+960 (1280 HP)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 180 ft. swim
Armor Class: 72 (+1 Dex, +2 size, +12 insight, +12 luck, +35 natural), 37 touch, 59 flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple: +30/+20
Attack: Tail slap +78 melee (1d4+27) or tentacle rake +78 (2d8+27)
Full Attack: Tail slap +78 melee (1d4+27) plus 10 tentacle rakes +78 (2d8+27)
Space/Reach: 2½ ft./0 ft
Special Attacks: Smite good
Special Qualities: SR 200, resistance to cold and fire 10, resistance to acid and electricity 60, DR 15/epic, darkvision 60 ft, SLAs, fast healing 20, alternate form, improved grab
Saves: Fort +34, Ref +35, Will +24
Abilities Str 40, Dex 38, Con 35, Int 18, Wis 37, Cha 17
Skills: Swim +60, a bunch of unused skill points
Feats: Weapon Finesse (B), a bunch of free feats
Environment: Wherever evil dwells in the hearts of man.
Organization: The Salmon of Hate swims alone.
Challenge Rating: Bend over; kiss ass goodbye.
Treasure: Still being alive.
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Advancement: –
Level Adjustment: –

Smite Good (Su): Once per day the salmon can make a normal melee attack to deal +20 damage against a good foe. The salmon gains a +13 insight bonus on the attack roll.

Alternate Form (Su): At will, the salmon can take the form of a grotesque, tentacled mass (or another appropriately gruesome form), but all its abilities remain unchanged despite the alien appearance. Changing shape is a standard action. Other creatures receive a -1 morale penalty on their attack rolls against the salmon in this alternate form.

Improved Grab (Ex): If the salmon hits an opponent smaller than it with a tentacle, it deals normal damage and attempts to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity.

Rotting Constriction (Ex): Once the salmon has hold of an opponent, each successful grapple check it makes during subsequent rounds permanently drains 2d4 points of Constitution. At the same time, the salmon regains 10 lost hit points.

Spell-like Abilities (Sp): At will—blur, dimension door, shield, unhallow ; CL 20

3/day - greater dispel magic, haste, and see invisibility ; CL 15

Skills

The salmon receives a +10 racial bonus on Swim checks.

===

There is almost certainly something wrong in here, because template stacking is kind of a pain in the ass, so feel free to correct me if you spot anything wrong.

[deuxhero]

That Salmon looks like it might take TWO carps to kill.

[Ravens_cry]

That Salmon looks like it might take TWO carps to kill.
Or one Cat.
Get 'em, Snuggles! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5057178&postcount=24)

[Skelengar]

Or one Cat.
Get 'em, Snuggles! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=5057178&postcount=24)

If I recall, Snuggles eats Epic Salmon for breakfast.

[Rising Phoenix]

Sounds like the dorfish carp.

Hm.

Salmon

Tiny Animal (Aquatic)
Hit Dice: ½d8 (2 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. swim
Armor Class: 13 (+1 Dex, +2 size), 13 touch, 12 flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple: +0/-10
Attack: Tail slap +3 melee (1d4-4)
Full Attack: Tail slap +3 melee (1d4-4)
Space/Reach: 2½ ft./0 ft
Special Attacks: –
Special Qualities:
Saves: Fort +2, Ref +3, Will +1
Abilities Str 3, Dex 13, Con 10, Int 1, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills: Swim +11
Feats: Weapon Finesse (B)
Environment: Aquatic
Organization: Solitary or school (8-64)
Challenge Rating: 1/6
Treasure: None
Alignment: True Neutral
Advancement: 1-3 HD (Tiny)
Level Adjustment: –

Skills

The salmon receives a +10 racial bonus on Swim checks.

The Salmon of Hate
Advanced Fiendish Paragon Pseudonatural Salmon

Tiny Outsider (Aquatic, Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 40d8+960 (1280 HP)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 180 ft. swim
Armor Class: 72 (+1 Dex, +2 size, +12 insight, +12 luck, +35 natural), 37 touch, 59 flat-footed
Base Attack/Grapple: +30/+20
Attack: Tail slap +78 melee (1d4+27) or tentacle rake +78 (2d8+27)
Full Attack: Tail slap +78 melee (1d4+27) plus 10 tentacle rakes +78 (2d8+27)
Space/Reach: 2½ ft./0 ft
Special Attacks: Smite good
Special Qualities: SR 200, resistance to cold and fire 10, resistance to acid and electricity 60, DR 15/epic, darkvision 60 ft, SLAs, fast healing 20, alternate form, improved grab
Saves: Fort +34, Ref +35, Will +24
Abilities Str 40, Dex 38, Con 35, Int 18, Wis 37, Cha 17
Skills: Swim +60, a bunch of unused skill points
Feats: Weapon Finesse (B), a bunch of free feats
Environment: Wherever evil dwells in the hearts of man.
Organization: The Salmon of Hate swims alone.
Challenge Rating: Bend over; kiss ass goodbye.
Treasure: Still being alive.
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Advancement: –
Level Adjustment: –

Smite Good (Su): Once per day the salmon can make a normal melee attack to deal +20 damage against a good foe. The salmon gains a +13 insight bonus on the attack roll.

Alternate Form (Su): At will, the salmon can take the form of a grotesque, tentacled mass (or another appropriately gruesome form), but all its abilities remain unchanged despite the alien appearance. Changing shape is a standard action. Other creatures receive a -1 morale penalty on their attack rolls against the salmon in this alternate form.

Improved Grab (Ex): If the salmon hits an opponent smaller than it with a tentacle, it deals normal damage and attempts to start a grapple as a free action without provoking an attack of opportunity.

Rotting Constriction (Ex): Once the salmon has hold of an opponent, each successful grapple check it makes during subsequent rounds permanently drains 2d4 points of Constitution. At the same time, the salmon regains 10 lost hit points.

Spell-like Abilities (Sp): At will—blur, dimension door, shield, unhallow ; CL 20

3/day - greater dispel magic, haste, and see invisibility ; CL 15

Skills

The salmon receives a +10 racial bonus on Swim checks.

===

There is almost certainly something wrong in here, because template stacking is kind of a pain in the ass, so feel free to correct me if you spot anything wrong.

The bears have finally met their match...

[Ravens_cry]

If I recall, Snuggles eats Epic Salmon for breakfast.

Good Cat Provides for all Her Children in Accordance to Their Needs.
Even Snuggles.