In Da Club

[Newman]

I'm surprised to find out that there are very few people who actually can dance... so why has clubbing, as opposed to pub crawling (or daylight partying), become so popular? Do people have such low self-esteem and/or high standards that they can't stand to meet and befriend each other unless they in a place that's poorly lit, so noisy you can't hear yourself talking, and with at least a couple-beers worth of pink mist to cloudtemper your judgement?

[Greensleeves]

I actually like clubbing. But there's a big if to it. And that's "IF I'm in the right mood for it."

If I am in the mood for it, clubbing can be a lot of fun. The dark room, the pulsing, pounding music. The dancing, the heavy breathing, the intoxication from both the booze, the people and the music. The euphoria as you dance the night away.

Sure I suck at dancing, but at a club, no one cares.

Another thing is that it's (supposedly) easy to pick up chicks at a club. I haven't tried so I can't comment on that.

[Newman]

Much easier to pick up chicks (and have fun, and dance) at private parties, I assure you.

[Greensleeves]

Much easier to pick up chicks (and have fun, and dance) at private parties, I assure you.

Debatable. I'd say it depends on ones mood. Private parties can be great, absolutely. But there are times when, personally, I just want to go to a dark, loud club and have fun.

As I said, the chicks part, I can't comment on personally, as I've never tried to pick up chicks at clubs.

[Tyriont]

I think a part of it is the difference between meeting people in a crowd as opposed to a more one-on-one environment. Since both are technically crowd environments, I should elaborate.

As an outside observer (since the club scene is definitely not mine), it seems that when meeting people at a club via dancing - well, it's like you said. Very few people can actually dance, so odds are most people are doing at least as badly as you. By comparison, you don't look so bad. At a pub, or private party it's far more likely that conversation is going to be the primary activity. Well, aside from the drinking.

In a conversation the focus of the attention is you and you alone - it's hard to compare what you're saying to what everyone else is. You fail or succeed purely on your own merits without the safety net of "it's obvious I'm not doing any worse than that guy on the other side of the room".

The theory isn't hard and fast by any means. There are people like Greensleeves who go clubbing more for the atmosphere than to meet people (at least, that's the impression I got from your post. I apologize if I'm misinterpreting). But from what I've seen, a lot of people are nervous when it comes to public speaking and the reasons for that carry over a lot into talking to someone you just met at the pub.

Again, I might be wildly off the mark here...it's just something I've noticed in casual observation.

[Dr.Epic]

Well, clubs have alcohol. And potential hot men and/or women. You do the math kids.:smallwink: :smalltongue:

[Mauve Shirt]

Psh. I'm more likely to dance in a club with strangers than at a private party. If I dance, I prefer to NOT do it in front of my friends. :smalltongue:

[Mystic Muse]

Much easier to pick up chicks (and have fun, and dance) at private parties, I assure you.

The private parties I go to are like 95% family, and the other 5% are their girlfriends/boyfriends.

So, no, it'd be much easier to pick up chicks at a club than it would be the private parties I go to.:smalltongue:

[Orzel]

I can dance so have not problem clubbing. Clubs all you to dance with people you haven't met yet. Unlike most parties where you have to maintain connections to. Fewer chances of you or your friends bumping into other friends, exes, enemies, or people who owe or you owe money.

Also since clubs have fewer people who know you, they don't remember you when you leave and who with

And clubs have better security.

[Mx.Silver]

Alcohol and the potential of sex (however remote), from what I can tell.

[Don Julio Anejo]

Trust me, it is much, much easier to pick up chicks at private parties. By private parties, I mean parties Van Wylder style ones (okay, maybe not as intense, but you get the drift), not family get-togethers.

In a club you're competing with 1. People who can actually dance; 2. Really attractive people; 3. People with lots of money who aren't afraid to throw it around; 4. Confident douchebags. Some will be a combination of the above. In a club setting, these kinds of people are attractive to the kind of girls that typically go to clubs with either the intention, or at without dismissing the possibility of, getting laid.

But to be fair, that's my case. I'm a much better talker than anything else. At a house party, you can treat it as you would a club (lots of drunk, horny strangers dancing), -OR- like a place to have a conversation.

As for why it's popular... probably a combination of factors like MTV, dance music, easier time setting it up than a house party (which is a pain to plan even for 20-30 people, much less a hundred or so), the fact that most pop stars like to go clubbing and so sing about it very often... Drunk people who often want to have sex helps too.

[Newman]

Trust me, it is much, much easier to pick up chicks at private parties. By private parties, I mean parties Van Wylder style ones (okay, maybe not as intense, but you get the drift), not family get-togethers.

In a club you're competing with 1. People who can actually dance; 2. Really attractive people; 3. People with lots of money who aren't afraid to throw it around; 4. Confident douchebags. Some will be a combination of the above. In a club setting, these kinds of people are attractive to the kind of girls that typically go to clubs with either the intention, or at without dismissing the possibility of, getting laid.

But to be fair, that's my case. I'm a much better talker than anything else. At a house party, you can treat it as you would a club (lots of drunk, horny strangers dancing), -OR- like a place to have a conversation.

As for why it's popular... probably a combination of factors like MTV, dance music, easier time setting it up than a house party (which is a pain to plan even for 20-30 people, much less a hundred or so), the fact that most pop stars like to go clubbing and so sing about it very often... Drunk people who often want to have sex helps too.

See, the problem with that last bit is that... as Shakespeare would put it... the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak...

[llamamushroom]

For the most part, I think that it's the fact that clubs are parties that have a schedule.

House parties are a lot of fun, basically everyone agrees to that. The problem is that they are at someone's house. Someone who will have to clean up afterwards. And with people who you might see fairly frequently, in front of whom you may not want to dance like a deranged baboon (my situation) or drink so much you forget that you dance like a deranged baboon. Meeting strangers and bonding over mutual liver destruction without ever having to hear their voices has its benefits.

Also, you need to actually know people to go to a house party, and those people need to have houses that will fit enough people. As a teacher in China, I have met both of those stumbling blocks. While here, I know just about no-one who doesn't live in the school's apartments, which are minuscule. When I first arrived, I didn't even know them. I could think "I need to socialise with people who have been through puberty and don't judge me for my utter lack of qualifications - I'll go to a club!" and off I would trot. Socialisation would ensue, and while I enjoyed it less than I would a house party, it was the best I could do.

Don Julio Anejo, you list four reasons why you think clubs are much harder to pick up at than private parties, conveniently listing four reasons why some people love clubbing - where brilliant conversation might be your forte, I know some people who love being confident scumbags and getting women (and men - having a uterus by no means excludes you from such behaviour, and there is such a thing as a gay club) who would die if they had to actually speak to their quarry.

Holy fermenting bean curd, that was a long and almost pointless post. Sorry about that.

[Bastian Weaver]

Alcohol? Meh.
Possible sex? Yeah, right. With people whom you can barely see, because it's dark, and barely hear, because of roaring music. Kind of hard to make impressions, no?