meto30
2012-05-20, 11:29 AM
In near future, about three sessions later (which means within the month or close), my players will most probably be hearing (or reading, depends) an ancient bardic text, an ode to heroes of past, present, and future. The event is supposed to be one of the big reveals in the campaign, and I want the ode to be as memorable as I can make it, but... I can't write rhymes worth a d**n. I'm confident with my plain text writing, but poetry is something I've never been able to do all my life. So, I'd like to ask help from the forum to make this passage of text rhyme. (like a proper bardic song)
The passage itself, sadly, isn't complete. As I was intending this to rhyme, I wrote in important parts and tried to fill in the blanks with rhyming ones, but that didn't work out. Anyways, it goes like this:
...
Appointed unawares, yet of their duty aware
Not to be ruled by fate, but rather to rule it,
not to rule the world, but rather to serve it.
...
gods raised them from the dirt to do what they could not
...
to each a purpose, a goal, and power to achieve it
and light to guide their way through paths unforseen
...
souls freed from the chains of fate
...
Even as the world is shattered, its fabric torn ashunder
they shall bind it together, as they're destined to do.
...
Great be their cause, their appointed duty,
ordained to go beyond the realm of mortals
...
their tales unsung, their names and deeds stricken
yet their efforts remembered, their sacrifice unforgotten
all praise them with all they've to give
for they lose all so that not all may be lost.
The '...' denotes that something should fill the line. I have not decided how long this should be, but I'd prefer it to be about 12~20 lines, not too long (nothing like 'Earendil was a mariner who tarried in Rivendel', because that almost drove Elrond to sleep!). Also, while this song promotes the value of the Heroes, their sacrifice in service to the world, and that all should praise them, I want the overall mood to be sober and fatalistic, and if possible I'd like to plant the following subliminal message: "Pray ye mere mortals, pray and be afraid! We're doomed without Heroes to save us!" Not that I know how that can be done. At least not yet.
If it serves to help it rhyme (or otherwise makes it a better poem) I'm fully willing to change the lines that I already wrote.
EDIT: OK, so it seems nobody is willing (or able) to help me. Sad...
The passage itself, sadly, isn't complete. As I was intending this to rhyme, I wrote in important parts and tried to fill in the blanks with rhyming ones, but that didn't work out. Anyways, it goes like this:
...
Appointed unawares, yet of their duty aware
Not to be ruled by fate, but rather to rule it,
not to rule the world, but rather to serve it.
...
gods raised them from the dirt to do what they could not
...
to each a purpose, a goal, and power to achieve it
and light to guide their way through paths unforseen
...
souls freed from the chains of fate
...
Even as the world is shattered, its fabric torn ashunder
they shall bind it together, as they're destined to do.
...
Great be their cause, their appointed duty,
ordained to go beyond the realm of mortals
...
their tales unsung, their names and deeds stricken
yet their efforts remembered, their sacrifice unforgotten
all praise them with all they've to give
for they lose all so that not all may be lost.
The '...' denotes that something should fill the line. I have not decided how long this should be, but I'd prefer it to be about 12~20 lines, not too long (nothing like 'Earendil was a mariner who tarried in Rivendel', because that almost drove Elrond to sleep!). Also, while this song promotes the value of the Heroes, their sacrifice in service to the world, and that all should praise them, I want the overall mood to be sober and fatalistic, and if possible I'd like to plant the following subliminal message: "Pray ye mere mortals, pray and be afraid! We're doomed without Heroes to save us!" Not that I know how that can be done. At least not yet.
If it serves to help it rhyme (or otherwise makes it a better poem) I'm fully willing to change the lines that I already wrote.
EDIT: OK, so it seems nobody is willing (or able) to help me. Sad...