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Waker
2012-05-28, 07:23 PM
Chorister

"After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music."
Aldous Huxley

Class Skills: The chorister's class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Appraise (Int), Concentration (Con), Craft (Int), Decipher Script (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Forgery (Int), Gather Information (Cha), Heal (Wis), Knowledge (Arcana, History, Nature, Religion, The Planes) (Int), Listen (Wis), Perform (Cha), Profession (Wis), Sense Motive (Wis), Speak Language (N/A), Spellcraft (Int), Use Magic Device (Cha).
Skill Points at 1st Level: (4 + Int modifier) x 4.
Skill Points at Each Additional Level: 4 + Int modifier.

Hit Die: D8
\n\n\tLevel\n\tBase Attack Bonus\n\tFort Save\n\tRef Save\n\tWill Save\n\tSpecial\n\t0\n\t1st\n\t2nd\n\t3rd\n\t4th\n \t5th\n\t6th

\n\n\n\t1st\n\t
+0\n\t
+0\n\t
+0\n\t
+2\n\tHoly Scripture I, Sacred Voice I\n\t2\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t2nd\n\t
+1\n\t
+0\n\t
+0\n\t
+3\n\tSolemn Prayer, Roar of the Just\n\t3\n\t0\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t3rd\n\t
+2\n\t
+1\n\t
+1\n\t
+3\n\tBlessings of Fortune\n\t3\n\t1\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t4th\n\t
+3\n\t
+1\n\t
+1\n\t
+4\n\tTurn/Rebuke Undead, Wisdom of Brevity\n\t3\n\t2\n\t0\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t5th\n\t
+3\n\t
+1\n\t
+1\n\t
+4\n\tHoly Scripture II, Hymn of Exhilaration I\n\t3\n\t3\n\t1\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t6th\n\t
+4\n\t
+2\n\t
+2\n\t
+5\n\tSacred Voice II\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t7th\n\t
+5\n\t
+2\n\t
+2\n\t
+5\n\tTurn the Blade\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t0\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t8th\n\t
+6/+1\n\t
+2\n\t
+2\n\t
+6\n\tDeny Fortune\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t1\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t9th\n\t
+6/+1\n\t
+3\n\t
+3\n\t
+6\n\tHymn of Exhilaration II\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t-\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t10th\n\t
+7/+2\n\t
+3\n\t
+3\n\t
+7\n\tHoly Scripture III\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t0\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t11th\n\t
+8/+3\n\t
+3\n\t
+3\n\t
+7\n\tVoice of the Soul\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t1\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t12th\n\t
+9/+4\n\t
+4\n\t
+4\n\t
+8\n\t\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t-\n\t-

\n\n\n\t13th\n\t
+9/+4\n\t
+4\n\t
+4\n\t
+8\n\t\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t0\n\t-

\n\n\n\t14th\n\t
+10/+5\n\t
+4\n\t
+4\n\t
+9\n\tHymn of Exhilaration III\n\t4\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t1\n\t-

\n\n\n\t15th\n\t
+11/+6/+1\n\t
+5\n\t
+5\n\t
+9\n\t\n\t4\n\t4\n\t3\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t-

\n\n\n\t16th\n\t
+12/+7/+2\n\t
+5\n\t
+5\n\t
+10\n\t\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t3\n\t3\n\t2\n\t0

\n\n\n\t17th\n\t
+12/+7/+2\n\t
+5\n\t
+5\n\t
+10\n\tInspired Refrain\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t3\n\t3\n\t1

\n\n\n\t18th\n\t
+13/+8/+3\n\t
+6\n\t
+6\n\t
+11\n\t\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t3\n\t2

\n\n\n\t19th\n\t
+14/+9/+4\n\t
+6\n\t
+6\n\t
+11\n\t\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t3

\n\n\n\t20th\n\t
+15/+10/+5\n\t
+6\n\t
+6\n\t
+12\n\tVoice of the Heavens\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\t4\n\n

Class Features
All of the following are class features of the chorister.
Weapon and Armor Proficiencies: A chorister is proficient with all simple weapons, plus their deity's favored weapon. Choristers are proficient with all light and medium armor and light shields.
Spells: A chorister casts divine spells, which are drawn from the chorister spell list below. She can cast any spell she knows without preparing it ahead of time. When a chorister gains access to a new spell level, she automatically learns all the spells for the level listed on the chorister's spell list. Essentially, her spell list is the same as her spells known list. Choristers also add Domain spells (see below) to their list of spells known.
To cast a spell, a chorister must have a Charisma score equal to at least 10 + the spell level. The Difficulty Class for a saving throw against a chorister’s spell is 10 + the spell level + the chorister’s Charisma modifier. Like other spellcasters, a chorister can cast only a certain number of spells of each spell level per day. Her base daily spell allotment is given on Table: The Chorister. In addition, she receives bonus spells per day if she has a high Charisma score.
As noted above, a Chorister need not prepare her spells in advance. She can cast any spell she knows at any time, assuming she has not yet used up her allotment of spells per day for the spell’s level.
Aura:A chorister of chaotic, evil, good or lawful deity has a particularly powerful aura corresponding to their deity's alignment. Choristers who don't worship a particular deity but choose the Chaos, Evil, Good or Law domain have a similarly powerful aura of the corresponding alignment.
Deity, Domains, and Domain Spells: Choose a deity for your chorister. The chorister’s deity influences her alignment, what magic she can perform, her values, and how others see her. You may also choose for your chorister to have no deity.
If the typical worshipers of a deity include the members of a race, a chorister must be of the indicated race to choose that deity as his own. When you have chosen an alignment and a deity for your chorister, choose two domains from among those given for the deity. While the chorister of a particular religion are united in their reverence for their deity, each chorister emphasizes different aspects of the deity’s interests. You can select an alignment domain (Chaos, Evil, Good, or Law) for your chorister only if her alignment matches that domain.
If your chorister is not devoted to a particular deity, you still select two domains to represent her spiritual inclinations and abilities. The restriction on alignment domains still applies.
Each domain gives your chorister access to a domain spell at each spell level she can cast, from 1st on up, as well as a granted power. Your chorister gets the granted powers of both the domains selected.
The domain spells are automatically added to the choristers list of spells known.
Chaotic, Evil, Good, and Lawful Spells: A chorister can’t cast spells
of an alignment opposed to her own or her deity’s (if she has one). For example, a good chorister (or a neutral chorister of a good deity) cannot cast evil spells. Spells associated with particular alignments are indicated by the chaos, evil, good, and law descriptors in their spell descriptions.
Holy Scripture (Su): The chorister can begin quoting scripture to strengthen her allies or hinder her foes. Quoting scripture requires a standard action to make a Perform check, though maintaining the effect requires a move action. While using this ability, the chorister may not cast spells, activate spell complete, trigger or command magic items. The chorister may activate this ability once per day per chorister level. A chorister may maintain a Holy Scripture for a maximum of 1 minute, unless the specific performance says otherwise. After a performance stops, the effects continue for three rounds, unless the specific performance says otherwise. All bonuses or penalities are typed as either Holy (for Good Choristers) or Profane (for Evil Choristers). If the Chorister has a Neutral alignment, they may choose either Holy or Profane at character creation. Feats and classes that progress or interact with Bardic Music may be applied to Holy Scripture.
-Verse of Valor: A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can armor her allies with her holy words. All allies within 60ft who can see and hear the chorister gain a +1 AC. At 5rd level and every five levels thereafter, this bonus increase by 1. In addition, allies affected by this performance gain a bonus against being Bullrushed, Disarmed, Grappled and Tripped equal to the chorister's charisma modifier.
-Temerarious Council: A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can invoke reckless behavior in her foes. All foes within 60ft who can see or hear the chorister take a -1 AC. At 5rd level and every five levels thereafter, this penalty increases by 1. In addition, an opponent who is affected by this scripture is denied the option of taking attacks of opportunity. An opponent must make a Will sv (DC = 10+1/2Chorister Level+Cha) to ignore both effects.
-Words of Restoration:A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can heal her allies with but a few words. All allies within 30ft who can see and hear gain immunity to poison and disease for as long as the Holy Scripture is maintained. If the ally is already suffering from a poison or disease the effects are suppressed and they are entitled to a new save with a bonus equal to the chorister's charisma modifier. In addition they gain Fast Healing 1, at 3rd level and every three levels thereafter Fast Healing improves by 1. At 4th level this ability also grants the effects of Lesser Restoration. This ability can only restore an ally once per Holy Scripture. At 8th level this ability grants the effects of Restoration. At 14th level this ability grants the effects Greater Restoration.
-Verse of Ardor: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can invigorate her allies and free them from hindering effects. All allies within 30ft who can see and hear the chorister may ignore the effects of fatigue/exhaustion, paralysis, stunning, daze and slow. At level 10, this ability includes any effect that would be countered by Freedom of Movement as well.
-Remonstration of Sloth: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can shackle her foes with her scriptures. All foes within 30ft who can see or hear the chorister are affected as if by the Slow spell. At level 10, this ability also includes the effects of Dimensional Anchor, preventing all teleportation effects within 30ft of the chorister. An opponent must make a Will sv (DC= 10+1/2Chorister Level+Cha) to ignore both effects. The chorister may affect a number of enemies equal to half her chorister level round down per performance.
-Words of the Immaculate Mind: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can armor her allies minds against the influence of others. All allies within 30ft that can see and hear the chorister are immune to compulsion and fear effects, as well as possession effects. If they are already under such an effect, the effects are suppressed and they may make another save against it with a bonus equal to the choristers Charisma modifier.
-Verse of the Inviolate:A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can make her allies skin tougher than iron. All allies within 60ft who can see or hear the chorister gain DR 5/- and energy resistance 10 against acid, cold, electricity or fire and spell resistance 20. The energy type is chosen at the start of the performance. At 15th level and again at 20th level, DR increases by 5, energy resistance by 10 and SR by 5.
-Words of Equality: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can grant her allies the ability to strike true. Allies who can see and hear the chorister gain the effects of See Invisibility, can strike incorporeal and ethereal creatures as if their weapons had the Force descriptor and may ignore any DR other than DR/- or DR/Epic. At level 15 the effects of See Invisibility are replaced with True Seeing.
-Soul's Return: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can use her connection to the divine to bring life to the dead. This performance requires 10 minutes to activate, at the completion of the chorister spends 5 uses of her Holy Scripture. At 10th level, this mimics the effects of Raise Dead. When the chorister reaches level 15, it instead mimics the effects of Resurrection. Upon reaching level 20, the performance mimics the effects of True Resurrection.
This performance does require expenditure of a material component equivalent to the spell effect that is being duplicated.
Sacred Voice (Su): By expending a use of Holy Scripture, a chorister may expand the range of any Cure/Inflict spell from Touch to Close (25ft +5/2 caster levels).
At 6th level, this ability may be used to extend the range of any other spell with a range of Touch.
Solemn Prayer: By expending a use of Holy Scripture a chorister may grant her allies a peaceful rest. She may designate a circle up to 50ft in diameter as being blessed for 24 hours. Invoking a prayer requires a 10 minute ceremony. Allies who rest within the circle gain the benefits of 8 hours sleep in 2 hours, though spellcasters must still spend six more hours at rest to regain spells. If they spend 8 hours sleeping, they recover as if they had full bed rest. If they do have full bed rest, they recover as if they had a full week of bed rest. Furthermore the area is warded with an alarm spell and those who rest within are protected from possession as if they were warded by Protection from Evil and immune to effects that influence dreams, such as Nightmare.
Roar of the Just:By expending a use of Holy Scripture as a swift action, a chorister can grant a target ally a special smite attack. The next melee or ranged attack made by the ally gains a bonus to hit equal to the chorister's charisma modifer and damage equal to her chorister level. If the attack misses, it still expends a use of this ability.
Blessings of Fortune (Su): Whenever a chorister or an ally within 30ft fail a saving throw, the chorister may expend a use of Holy Scripture as an immediate action to reroll the save with a bonus equal to the chorister's charisma modifier. They must accept the results of the second roll, even if it is worse.
Turn Undead (Su): When a chorister reaches 4th level, she gains the supernatural ability to turn undead. She may use this ability a number of times per day equal to 1 + her Charisma modifier. She turns undead as a cleric of three levels lower would.
Wisdom of Brevity: By expending an additional use of Holy Scripture, a chorister may begin a Holy Scripture as a swift action rather than a standard action. Maintaining the performance still requires a move action.
Hymn of Exhilaration: By expending a use of Holy Scripture as a standard action, a chorister may grant an ally within 60ft an immediate move action. This movement may provoke attacks of opportunity.
At level 9 a chorister gains the ability to grant an ally an additional standard action by expending three uses of Holy Scripture.
At level 14, a chorister may expend three uses of Holy Scripture to grant all allies an immediate move action.
This ability may be used once per round.
Turn the Blade (Su):As an immediate action, a chorister may expend two uses of Holy Scripture to render a critical hit by an enemy as a normal hit. The chorister must see the enemy making the attack and cannot be flat-footed. If the chorister uses this ability on an ally other than herself, the ally must be within 60ft.
Deny Fortune (Su):By expending three uses of Holy Scripture as an immediate action, a chorister may force an opponent within 60ft to reroll a saving throw. The chorister must be able to see the opponent and cannot be flat-footed.
Voice of the Soul: A chorister gains further insight into the divine. At level 11, a chorister gains the power to turn Outsiders who have an alignment subtype opposite to the chorister's aura and bolster Outsiders who share their alignment. For example, a Good chorister can turn outsiders with the Evil subtype and bolster outsiders with the Good subtype. Turned Outsiders cannot be destroyed by this ability.
Inspired Refrain: At level 17, a chorister may call upon his divine patrons to grant him additional power. A chorister may temporarily gain an additional spell slot by expending a number of uses of Holy Scripture equal to the spell level. The slot stays for one hour per point of the chorister's charisma modifier (minimum 1). If it is unused before then, the slot is lost without benefit.
Voice of the Heavens: At level 20 a chorister reaches the pinnacle of their abilities. They may now activate and maintain the effects of two performances Holy Scriptures at the same time.

Waker
2012-05-28, 07:24 PM
Chorister Spell List:
0-Create Water, Cure Minor Wounds, Detect Magic, Detect Poison, Guidance, Inflict Minor Wounds, Light, Purify Food and Drink, Resistance, Virtue.
1-Bane, Bless, Bless Weapon, Cure Light Wounds, Divine Favor, Doom, Endure Elements, Inflict Light Wounds, Magic Stone, Magic Weapon, Protection from Chaos/Evil/Good/Law, Remove Fear, Sanctuary, Shield of Faith, Summon Monster I
2-Aid, Align Weapon, Bear's Endurance, Bull's Strength, Cat's Grace, Consecrate, Cure Moderate Wounds, Delay Poison, Desecrate, Eagle's Splendor, Fox's Cunning, Inflict Moderate Wounds, Owl's Wisdom, Remove Paralysis, Resist Energy, Lesser Restoration, Shield Other, Spider Climb, Status, Summon Monster II
3-Bestow Curse, Blindness/Deafness, Cure Serious Wounds, Dispel Magic, Inflict Serious Wounds, Magic Circle Against Chaos/Evil/Good/Law, Magic Vestment, Prayer, Protection From Energy, Remove Blindness/Deafness, Remove Curse, Remove Disease, Summon Monster III, Water Breathing, Water Walk
4-Air Walk, Cure Critical Wounds, Death Ward, Dimensional Anchor, Divine Power, Freedom of Movement, Inflict Serious Wounds, Greater Magic Weapon, Neutralize Poison, Poison, Restoration, Spell Immunity, Summon Monster IV
5-Atonement, Break Enchantment, Mass Cure Light Wounds, Dispel Chaos/Evil/Good/Law, Hallow, Mass Inflict Light Wounds, Raise Dead, Righteous Might, Spell Resistance, Summon Monster V, True Seeing, Unhallow
6-Mass Bear's Endurance, Mass Bull Strength, Mass Cat's Grace, Mass Cure Moderate Wounds, Greater Dispel Magic, Mass Eagle's Splendor, Forbiddance, Mass Fox's Cunning, Harm, Heal, Heroe's Feast, Mass Inflict Moderate Wounds, Mass Owl's Wisdom, Summon Monster VI, Wind Walk

nonsi
2012-05-29, 01:14 AM
So far it's quite original and intriguing.
It seems like you're really on to something with this.
Try not to mess it up too much.
And make up your mind: "Chorister" or "Hymnist"? (or is it me that's missing something here?)

Waker
2012-05-29, 10:55 AM
The class is meant to be Chorister. I copy-pasted the parts where I had originally referred to the class as a Hymnist. Thought I had found and edited those parts.
As for my goal for the class, I want to make it a buffer/debuffer with some healing ability. Once I'm finished, the main class feature will be the Holy Scripture ability. I'm specifically aiming to make it better than Bardic Music, which I find to be somewhat underwhelming. I've played D&D for 10 years and I have never seen anyone use most of the bardic music abilities, other than Inspire Courage.
When I do eventually compile the spell list, it will mostly be limited to Conjuration (Healing), Transmutation and Abjuration, though as noted it will be augmented by the choice of domains.

Morph Bark
2012-06-17, 07:21 AM
Under Spells you say "When a chorister gains access to a new spell list, she automatically learns all the spells for the level listed on the chorister's spell list". I presume you meant spell level here.

Aura: Nitpick, there are no Chaotic or Lawful domains, instead being named the Chaos and Law domains.

Holy Scripture: should have it saying "check" after Perform (oratory, poetry or singing).

Verse of Valor: I presume the +1 for each adjacent ally is for each ally adjacent to those receiving the +2 bonus? Might be a good idea to say "each ally adjacent to allies receiving the benefits of Verse of Valor" instead of "each adjacent ally", that might make it clearer.

Likewise for Temerarious Council, which, by the way, has a tremendously original name that confuses me as to its exact meaning. Kudos!

Words of Restoration: "At 4th level this ability duplicates Lesser Restoration. This ability can only restore an ally once per Holy Scripture. At 8th level this ability duplicates Restoration. At 14th level this ability duplicates Greater Restoration." The way the ability is worded, you lose the ability to grant Fast Healing and immunity to disease and poison, because the ability is ditched and replaced with a Restoration-like effect. Add in to make it say "at Xth level this ability may instead duplicate (Lesser/Greater) Restoration" or "at Xth level this ability also bestows a (Lesser/Greater) Restoration upon all those affected by the ability".

Verse of Ardor is a very nice ability. Good too that you made it say that at level 10 it includes everything Freedom of Movement counters, rather than it saying it duplicates Freedom of Movement (as then some people might argue some of the earlier effects would not be momentarily negated).

Remonstration of Sloth has the same wording problem as Words of Restoration, with the "duplicates" and such.

Verse of the Inviolate is way too powerful for a level 10 ability. Maybe if the DR was DR/magic and the SR was 20 and energy resistances were 10 instead. Otherwise, I'd move it to level 15.

Considering the level progression of Holy Scripture, I presume level 10, 15 and 20 would all each get 3 uses for it, so I take it it's not done yet?

As I skimmed the other abilities, I saw that nearly all of them expend uses of Holy Scripture, yet aren't listed as being a subset of the Holy Scripture ability like Verse of Ardor and such. I also think it is a very bad idea to make all the class abilities depend on uses of Holy Scripture, as they will all compete for the same resource. Instead, give them limited uses per day seperate from Holy Scripture, or make some based on making a Perform (oratory, poetry or singing) check and hitting a certain DC (which I think sounds perfect for Sacred Voice) or expending a spell slot of a certain level or higher.

Waker
2012-06-17, 11:24 AM
Thanks for the critique Morph Bark, I made a few tweaks and corrected some unclear wording. Anyways, my response for a few of your points.
Temerarious Council could be thought of as Inspire Recklessness (though there is already an ability named that). Rather than going the route of Inspire Courage and make you better at hitting the enemy, I went with making the enemy easier to hit.
I did tweak Verse of the Inviolate, but DR/Magic would be way too easy to overcome by level 10. I instead lowered it a bit, but might change it to DR/Alignment based on the Aura of the Chorister. As for the SR, I do still kinda want to keep it at 15+Level, since 10+Level is a 50% chance to succeed against an equal CR challenge without spell penetration or anything to increase caster level. And that's assuming the threat is equal CR. For now I'll change it though.
I'm still debating on including more performances for Holy Scripture. I might instead space them out a bit, but if I think of a particularly nice performance I might include it.
Lastly I intended for the other class abilities to key off of Holy Scripture uses. I wanted players to have the option of focusing on using Holy Scripture performances, force rerolls or grant people extra damage and actions. I did include the option the increase the amount of uses by taking feats like Extra Music.

DiBastet
2012-06-17, 08:20 PM
Yes, more performances for Holy Scripture. Players love this kind of thing, and after I added some more high-level options of performances for the bard, it became much more popular.

That said, if there was more higher level performances, i would shamelessly use this class in the place of my own "mystic" that is supposed to use some divine speech, but doesn't work so well as your.

Waker
2012-06-17, 09:05 PM
Well, I'll ponder making some more Holy Scripture performances. In keeping with the theme, I'll make two more for level 10 and another 3 at level 15. If anyone has any suggestions for performances, feel free to make them. Here are a couple of potential performances that I might add.

Words of Equality: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can grant her allies the ability to strike true. Allies who can see and hear the chorister gain the effects of See Invisibility, can strike incorporeal and ethereal creatures as if their weapons had the Force descriptor and may ignore any DR other than DR/- or DR/Epic. At level 15 the effects of See Invisibility are replaced with True Seeing.

Denying the Leyline: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can cut off her opponents from accessing magic. At the start of the perfomance, the chorister must make a performance check. For as long as the performance is maintained, foes who cast spells or use spell-like abilities must make a caster level check against the Perform DC. If they fail to overcome the DC, they take a penalty to caster level equal to the chorister's charisma modifier. In addition, for as long as the chorister maintains the performance she may ready an action to counterspell. If she successfully identifies the spell, she may counter it by sacrificing a number of Holy Scripture performances equal to the spells level.

Waker
2012-07-05, 09:57 AM
I really didn't want to bump this, but does anyone have any comments or questions about the class? I really want to finish this class before I work on any other homebrew.

Do not be afraid to post, I won't bite.

grarrrg
2012-07-07, 12:32 PM
Divine Bard...roughly in the Tier 3 area.

Chorister
Skill Points at 1st Level: (4 + Int modifier) x 4.
Skill Points at Each Additional Level: 4 + Int modifier.
Hit Die: D8
*TABLE*

Well, obviously, the best comparison is Bard, with a little Wizard/Cleric dynamic thrown in.

HP up, Skills down, same Bab, lost 1 good save, same spell progression.
So far, so good.


Class Features
All of the following are class features of the chorister.
Weapon and Armor Proficiencies: A chorister is proficient with all simple weapons, plus their deity's favored weapon. Choristers are proficient with medium armor and light shields.
You probably should put "light and medium" armor.


Spells: A chorister casts divine spells, ...She can cast any spell she knows without preparing it ahead of time. When a chorister gains access to a new spell level, she automatically learns all the spells for the level listed on the chorister's spell list....Choristers also add Domain spells (see below) to their list of spells known.

A spontaneous 'full list known' caster?
Potential problem, but manageable. There won't be any "splat books" to expand the list, so the only concerns are if you start adding Homebrew spells, and/or the Two Domain spell-lists.
Possibly drop 1 spell slot per level, but add a Domain Slot that can 'only' be used for Domain spells (still spontaneous, but with only 2 choices).



Holy Scripture (Su):...
-Verse of Valor: A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can armor her allies with her holy words. All allies who can see and hear the chorister gain a +2 AC, plus an additional +1 for each adjacent ally receiving the benefits of Verse of Valor. At 3rd level and every three levels thereafter, both of these bonuses increase by 1....
-Temerarious Council: A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can invoke reckless behavior in her foes. All foes who can see or hear the chorister take a -2 AC, plus an additional -1 for each adjacent foe receiving the penalty for Temerarious Council. At 3rd level and every three levels thereafter, both of these penalties increase by 1.

I know the goal is 'better than Bard', but the bonuses/penalties may need tweaking, they seem 'OK' for lower levels, but can get out of hand quickly.
+2 AC, +1 for each adj. ally. BOTH +1 every 3 levels...
At level 18+ this becomes:
+8 AC, +7 for each adj. Ally.
So just for standing next to someone I get +15 AC?
If four of us stand in a 'box' formation we each get +29 AC??
Likewise, two adj. Opponents get -15 AC each?
It is harder to manage how opponents arrange themselves though. So it partially depends on if they know/realize the massive penalties they have
Also, does the "Will Save to Ignore" apply to just the opponents denied AoOs, or does it apply to the AC penalty as well?


-Words of Restoration:A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can heal her allies with but a few words. All allies who can see and hear gain immunity to poison and disease for as long as the Holy Scripture is maintained.

Immune is fine, but what about pre-existing poison/disease?
Are they cured? Or just suppressed for the duration?


-Verse of Ardor: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can invigorate her allies and free them from hindering effects. All allies who can see and hear the chorister may ignore the effects of fatigue/exhaustion, paralysis, stunning, daze and slow. At level 10, this ability includes any effect that would be countered by Freedom of Movement as well.

This ones a little more straight forward then the Restoration one.
"ignore the effects" means they still ARE fatigued/exhausted/etc... they just don't take the normal penalties.


-Remonstration of Sloth: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can shackle her foes with her scriptures. All foes who can see or hear the chorister are affected as if by the Slow spell. At level 10, this ability also includes the effects of Dimensional Anchor, preventing all teleportation effects within 60ft of the chorister. An opponent must make a Will sv (DC= Performance Check) to ignore this effect.

Again, does the will save negate ALL penalties? or just the Teleportaion clause?


-Words of the Immaculate Mind: A chorister of 5th level or higher with at least 8 ranks in Perform can armor her allies minds against the influence of others. All allies that can see and hear the chorister are immune to compulsion and fear effects, as well as possession effects. If they are already under such an effect, the effects are suppressed and they may make another save against it with a bonus equal to the choristers Charisma modifier.

Good, clearly 'suppressed'.


-Verse of the Inviolate:A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can make her allies skin tougher than iron. All allies who can see or hear the chorister gain DR 5/- and energy resistance 10 against acid, cold, electricity and fire and spell resistance 20. At 15th level and again at 20th level, DR increases by 5, energy resistance by 10 and SR by 5.

As mentioned before, those numbers seem high, especially if they apply to the whole group.
On the other hand, Spell Resistance can be a bad thing when it comes to Friendly spells.
I would change the Energy Resist to "acid, cold, electricity OR fire" chosen at beginning of performance. Possibly allow the resist to be split among multiple in 5 or 10 point increments (so at level 15 I can give "fire resist 20" or "acid/cold resist 10").


Sacred Voice (Su):...
At 6th level, this ability may be used to extend the range of any other spell with a range of Touch.
At level 12 you may apply the benefits of any spell modified by this ability to another ally/level, no two of which can be more than 30ft apart.

Again, potential for abuse depending on spell list/domains.


Solemn Prayer: By expending a use of Holy Scripture a chorister... Furthermore...immune to effects that influence dreams, such as Nightmare.

Instead of "immune", possibly make (scaling) "bonus to save vs."


Roar of the Just:By expending a use of Holy Scripture as a swift action, a chorister can grant her allies or herself a special smite attack. The next melee or ranged attack that is made gains a bonus to hit equal to the chorister's level and damage equal to her charisma modifier.
Is one smite granted? or does everybody get one?
Probably add a qualifier of "this special smite must be used within # rounds, or it is lost".


Turn Undead (Su): When a chorister reaches 4th level, she gains the supernatural ability to turn undead. She may use this ability a number of times per day equal to 3 + her Charisma modifier. She turns undead as a cleric of three levels lower would.
Fine, possibly drop to 1+CHA/day uses or something, as this is a CHA based casting class, as opposed to the Cleric where CHA is secondary at best.


Hymn of Exhilaration: By expending a use of Holy Scripture as a standard action, a chorister may grant an ally an immediate move action. This movement may provoke attacks of opportunity.
At level 9 a chorister gains the ability to grant an ally an additional standard action by expending three uses of Holy Scripture.
At level 14, a chorister may expend three uses of Holy Scripture to grant all allies within 60ft an immediate move action.
Good.


Turn the Blade (Su):As an immediate action, a chorister may expend two uses of Holy Scripture to render a critical hit by an enemy as a normal hit. The chorister must see the enemy making the attack and cannot be flat-footed.
Does the Critical have to be hitting the Chorister? The Chorister or any Ally?


Inspired Refrain: At level 17, a chorister may call upon his divine patrons to grant him additional power. A chorister may temporarily gain an additional spell slot by expending a number of uses of Holy Scripture equal to the spell level. The slot stays for one hour per point of the chorister's charisma modifier (minimum 1). If it is unused before then, the slot is lost without benefit.

Fine on its own, but if you go with my Domain Slot idea above, it may need clarification.


Voice of the Heavens: At level 20 a chorister reaches the pinnacle of their abilities. They may now activate and maintain the effects of two performances Holy Scriptures at the same time.

Overall looks good.

Waker
2012-07-07, 05:01 PM
Well, first off thanks for the critique graarrrg. I'll address each of your points now.


You probably should put "light and medium" armor.
I'll clarify that now.


A spontaneous 'full list known' caster?
Potential problem, but manageable. There won't be any "splat books" to expand the list, so the only concerns are if you start adding Homebrew spells, and/or the Two Domain spell-lists.
Possibly drop 1 spell slot per level, but add a Domain Slot that can 'only' be used for Domain spells (still spontaneous, but with only 2 choices).

I'm not too concerned about the spont. casting, since the spell list isn't that that powerful, especially when you compare it to a versatile class like a beguiler. I suppose I could limit the use of the domain spells to once a day like a cleric, but being able to choose which one they cast at the time of use.


+2 AC, +1 for each adj. ally. BOTH +1 every 3 levels...
At level 18+ this becomes:
+8 AC, +7 for each adj. Ally.
So just for standing next to someone I get +15 AC?
If four of us stand in a 'box' formation we each get +29 AC??
Likewise, two adj. Opponents get -15 AC each?
It is harder to manage how opponents arrange themselves though. So it partially depends on if they know/realize the massive penalties they have
Also, does the "Will Save to Ignore" apply to just the opponents denied AoOs, or does it apply to the AC penalty as well?

I doubt that you'd get too many teams utilizing the adjacent allies boost at the higher levels, given the potential danger of AoE attacks, but I suppose with summoned creatures it might be effective. Can you think of a potential replacement for the secondary boost?
And the will save negates the AC penalty and the AoO effect.


Immune is fine, but what about pre-existing poison/disease?
Are they cured? Or just suppressed for the duration?
Suppressed and entitled to a new save.


Again, does the will save negate ALL penalties? or just the Teleportaion clause?
Will save negates all effects. I'll clarify.


As mentioned before, those numbers seem high, especially if they apply to the whole group.
On the other hand, Spell Resistance can be a bad thing when it comes to Friendly spells.
I would change the Energy Resist to "acid, cold, electricity OR fire" chosen at beginning of performance. Possibly allow the resist to be split among multiple in 5 or 10 point increments (so at level 15 I can give "fire resist 20" or "acid/cold resist 10").
DR 5 is high at level 10? Examining every CR appropriate threat for a level 10 party would take a lot of work, but I'll grab a few examples. Umber Hulk (CR7) deals an average of 10 damage with each claw and 11 damage with it's bite. A Roc (CR9) deals 18 with each claw and 14 with it's bite. A Greater Water Elemental (CR9) deals 18 with each of it's two slam attacks. An adult Green Dragon (CR13) deals 20 with it's bite, 10 with it's two claws, 8 with it's two wings and 18 with the tail.
I could probably put in a note about voluntarily lowering the SR for friendly spells.
As for the energy resistance, I'll change it to specify the energy type at the start of the casting.


Instead of "immune", possibly make (scaling) "bonus to save vs."
I could change it to a bonus to svs, but I don't think that nightmare and dream effects are that common. I figured I'd just put it in there just for some flavor and fun. If enough people feel the same I'll change it though.


Is one smite granted? or does everybody get one?
Probably add a qualifier of "this special smite must be used within # rounds, or it is lost".
One smite per use of the ability. I'll change it to specify that an ally must be targeted and a missed attack still counts as a use of the ability.


Fine, possibly drop to 1+CHA/day uses or something, as this is a CHA based casting class, as opposed to the Cleric where CHA is secondary at best.
Not too concerned with this one, but I can see the argument.


Does the Critical have to be hitting the Chorister? The Chorister or any Ally?
Nope, the ability works on any ally, chorister included. I just added the seeing and not flat-footed clause to deal with ambushes and the like.


Fine on its own, but if you go with my Domain Slot idea above, it may need clarification.
I suppose I could tweak it, I'll think about what I could change it to.

Oh yeah, I'm thinking of adding these performances to the list. Any opinions of them?

Words of Equality: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can grant her allies the ability to strike true. Allies who can see and hear the chorister gain the effects of See Invisibility, can strike incorporeal and ethereal creatures as if their weapons had the Force descriptor and may ignore any DR other than DR/- or DR/Epic. At level 15 the effects of See Invisibility are replaced with True Seeing.


Denying the Leyline: A chorister of 10th level or higher with at least 13 ranks in Perform can cut off her opponents from accessing magic. At the start of the perfomance, the chorister must make a performance check. For as long as the performance is maintained, foes who cast spells or use spell-like abilities must make a caster level check against the Perform DC. If they fail to overcome the DC, they take a penalty to caster level equal to the chorister's charisma modifier. In addition, for as long as the chorister maintains the performance she may ready an action to counterspell. If she successfully identifies the spell, she may counter it by sacrificing a number of Holy Scripture performances equal to the spells level.

grarrrg
2012-07-07, 10:38 PM
I'm not too concerned about the spont. casting, since the spell list isn't that that powerful, especially when you compare it to a versatile class like a beguiler. I suppose I could limit the use of the domain spells to once a day like a cleric, but being able to choose which one they cast at the time of use.

If "spontaneous full list" caster were an Official class, I would call it outright broken/breakable.
Just a potential concern.


I doubt that you'd get too many teams utilizing the adjacent allies boost at the higher levels, given the potential danger of AoE attacks, but I suppose with summoned creatures it might be effective. Can you think of a potential replacement for the secondary boost?
And the will save negates the AC penalty and the AoO effect.

Well, the basic idea is fine 'straight AC bonus +adj. bonus', just that as-is it can get pretty high with minimal work.
I understand it should still be relevant/worth using though. Hmm...



DR 5 is high at level 10?
I could probably put in a note about voluntarily lowering the SR for friendly spells.
As for the energy resistance, I'll change it to specify the energy type at the start of the casting.

I'm fine with the DR.
But as it was, granting that much/many energy resists was a lot.
And SR is just "one of those things", too low and it's worthless, too high and it's REALLY hard to work around.


I suppose I could tweak it, I'll think about what I could change it to.

It's a fine ability, but if you use the "Domain slot" idea, you'd have to specify if you can get a 'normal' slot, or 'any slot'.


Oh yeah, I'm thinking of adding these performances to the list. Any opinions of them?

Bypass DR is fine, possibly change it to something like "can ignore an amount of DR equal to the Chorister's [level? CHA? other?]. This ability can not reduce a creature's DR/Epic"

Waker
2012-07-07, 11:08 PM
If "spontaneous full list" caster were an Official class, I would call it outright broken/breakable.
Just a potential concern.
While I'm aware of some of the ways that classes like Beguiler or Warmage can add to their spell list, I still don't think it's too bad, given that those are somewhat niche cases involving PrCs.


Well, the basic idea is fine 'straight AC bonus +adj. bonus', just that as-is it can get pretty high with minimal work.
I understand it should still be relevant/worth using though. Hmm...
Until I can think of a better replacement, for now I'll simply remove the AC from adjacent allies.


It's a fine ability, but if you use the "Domain slot" idea, you'd have to specify if you can get a 'normal' slot, or 'any slot'.
I do still like simply adding the domain spells to the list known, but if I can think of a good way to write that you are limited to casting one of the two (or more if you get extra domains) spells of a given level maybe I'll use that.


Bypass DR is fine, possibly change it to something like "can ignore an amount of DR equal to the Chorister's [level? CHA? other?]. This ability can not reduce a creature's DR/Epic"
I already forsaw the issue with DR/Epic, it was listed at the end of the description.

may ignore any DR other than DR/- or DR/Epic.

nonsi
2012-07-08, 09:00 AM
Regarding Holy Scripture & Voice of the Soul: What does "bolster" do (what are the resulting effects) ?

Waker
2012-07-08, 11:38 AM
Regarding Holy Scripture & Voice of the Soul: What does "bolster" do (what are the resulting effects) ?

For Holy Scripture I used the term bolster just in place of buffing, since bolster sounds like something more appropriate for flavor text. I suppose I should change it though since bolster is actually a game term.
In Voice of the Soul it refers to the Rebuke effect where your rebuking check replaces the HD of the creature if someone attempts to Turn it. Something of a rare scenario, but it's there if you somehow run into a chorister or another class that can Turn/Rebuke Outsiders.
Here's the quote from the SRD

Bolstering Undead
An evil cleric may also bolster undead creatures against turning in advance. He makes a turning check as if attempting to rebuke the undead, but the Hit Dice result on Table: Turning Undead becomes the undead creatures’ effective Hit Dice as far as turning is concerned (provided the result is higher than the creatures’ actual Hit Dice). The bolstering lasts 10 rounds. An evil undead cleric can bolster himself in this manner.
Looking at the class ability, it might be a decent idea to add Summon Monster X to the spell list, which I will do now.

nonsi
2012-07-09, 12:11 AM
I may have missed something, but I couldn't figure what "Holy Scripture II" and "Holy Scripture III" do.

Waker
2012-07-09, 10:47 AM
Those are mostly just noting when you get new performances available through Holy Scripture. I don't technically need them since Bardic Performance doesn't do that in the Bard table, but I like having the reminder and it fills the table up a bit, especially for level 10.

grarrrg
2012-07-11, 06:44 PM
Holy Scripture (Su):...
-Verse of Valor: A chorister with at least 3 ranks in Perform can armor her allies with her holy words. All allies who can see and hear the chorister gain a +2 AC, plus an additional +1 for each adjacent ally receiving the benefits of Verse of Valor. At 3rd level and every three levels thereafter, both of these bonuses increase by 1....

Until I can think of a better replacement, for now I'll simply remove the AC from adjacent allies.

Maybe just tweak the level increment.
Was originally +2 AC / +1 adj., +1/+1 every 3
Maxing out at +8 / +7 at level 18 for an "easy" AC bonus of +15

How about +2 AC / +1 adj., +3/+1 every 6 levels?
Maxes out at +11 / +4, for the same "easy" AC bonus of +15, but it won't shoot up quite so much from extra allies.

Or +4 AC / +1 adj., +2/+1 every 5
Maxes at +12 / +5, easy of +17

Mess around with the numbers some, find something that'll work.

Waker
2012-07-11, 08:09 PM
Maybe just tweak the level increment.
Was originally +2 AC / +1 adj., +1/+1 every 3
Maxing out at +8 / +7 at level 18 for an "easy" AC bonus of +15

How about +2 AC / +1 adj., +3/+1 every 6 levels?
Maxes out at +11 / +4, for the same "easy" AC bonus of +15, but it won't shoot up quite so much from extra allies.

Or +4 AC / +1 adj., +2/+1 every 5
Maxes at +12 / +5, easy of +17

Mess around with the numbers some, find something that'll work.

Maybe, but I'm liking the idea of granting something else. How about granting something like being immune to flanking? It would be something beneficial, but unless your DM throws a ton of Rogues at the party, it wouldn't be too powerful.

Waker
2013-03-05, 05:17 AM
Because I'm getting into the mood to work on some Homebrew again, I decided to dust off this class and try to put some more shine on it. I am going to be tweaking the class a bit more and if anyone has any comments or questions, speak up. I always love feedback.

-Flanking bonus on Verse of Valor dropped.
-Dropped the clumping penalty on Temerarious Council.
-Remonstration of Sloth DC changed to 10+1/2Chorister Level+Cha.
-Denying the Leyline was changed to opposed caster level checks.
-Roar of the Just was meant to mimic Smite, got the bonuses turned around. Have since fixed it.
-Hymn of Exhilaration changed to 1 use per round maximum.
-Deny Fortune reroll penalty removed.
-Changed the progression rate of Verse of Valor and Council. Added defensive bonus to Verse.
-Decreased the range of Words of Restoration, Verse of Ardor, Words of the Immaculate Mind to 30ft.
-Set maximum enemies affected by Remonstration of Sloth to half chorister level.
-Clarified that Voice of the Soul cannot destroy turned outsiders.