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RFLS
2012-06-03, 01:37 AM
Below is a class I've designed for the campaign I'm running. It is absolutely not intended for player use. It's intended to be able to take on a t3 party of 5 and have a decent shot at winning. I know that as written, it's somewhere between fairly and stupidly powerful; however, I'd very much appreciate some mechanics advice. This is the first class I've put together from scratch, and I'm not entirely confident that it will function as intended. It's supposed to be a self-buffing, melee oriented, battlefield controlling absolute monster, and, as previously said, capable of taking on a t3 party all by itself. PEACH away.

EDIT: The complement to this class may be found here. (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=246757) It's a mage class with much the same theme, done because I didn't like the shadowcaster/needed something more powerful.


The Dark Paladin

{table=head]Level | BAB | Will | Ref | Fort | Abilities | Rages/Day
1st | +1 | 2 | 0 | 2 | Umbric Rage, Darkness, Darkvision (60), 1st level Mysteries | 1
2nd | +2 | 3 | 0 | 3 | Keen Senses, Shadowfire Weapon | 1
3rd | +3 | 3 | 1 | 3 | Shadowy Haste, 2nd level Mysteries | 2
4th | +4 | 4 | 1 | 4 | Mettle, Shadow Armor | 2
5th | +5 | 4 | 1 | 4 | 3rd level Mysteries | 2
6th | +6/+1 | 5 | 2 | 5 | Shadowjump | 3
7th | +7/+2 | 5 | 2 | 5 | Improved Shadowfire Weapon, 4th level Mysteries | 3
8th | +8/+3 | 6 | 2 | 6 | | 3
9th | +9/+4 | 6 | 3 | 6 | Improved Shadow Armor, 5th level Mysteries | 4
10th | +10/+5 | 7 | 3 | 7 | | 4
11th | +11/+6/+1 | 7 | 3 | 7 | Piercing Gaze, Greater Umbric Rage, 6th level Mysteries | 4
12th | +12/+7/+2 | 8 | 4 | 8 | Improved Mettle | 5
13th | +13/+8/+3 | 8 | 4 | 8 | 7th level Mysteries| 5
14th | +14/+9/+4 | 9 | 4 | 9 | | 5
15th | +15/+10/+5 | 9 | 5 | 9 | Ultimate Shadow Armor, 8th level Mysteries | 6
16th | +16/+11/+6/+1 | 10 | 5 | 10 | | 6
17th | +17/+12/+7/+2 | 10 | 5 | 10 | True Seeing, 9th level Mysteries | 6
18th | +18/+13/+8/+3 | 11 | 6 | 11 | Tireless Umbric Rage | 6
19th | +19/+14/+9/+4 | 11 | 6 | 11 | | 6
20th | +20/+15/+10/+5 | 12 | 6 | 12 | Mighty Umbric Rage, Infinite Shadow | 6

[/table]


Class Information
Hit Die: d10
Alignment: Any
Class Skills: Balance, Concentration, Craft, Hide, Intimidate, Jump, Knowledge(Arcana), Knowledge(The Planes), Listen, Move Silently, Profession, Search, Sense Motive, Spot, Survival, Tumble
Skills at First Level: 4 x (4 + Int modifier)
Skills at Each Additional Level: 4 + Int modifier
Starting Gold: As Paladin


Abilities

Proficiencies: A Dark Paladin is proficient with light, medium, and heavy armor. He is also proficient with all simple and martial weapons.

Umbric Rage (Ex): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin may enter an Umbric Rage once per day, for a number of rounds equal to 3 + his Con modifier. During this time, the Dark Paladin gains +4 Strength, +4 Constitution, and +4 Dexterity. He also gains a +2 morale bonus to his Will saves. During this time, he may not cast any spells or spell like abilities known to him, nor may he use magical items that take conscious effort from the user. Additionally, he may not use the Concentration skill, or any Cha or Int based skills. Upon ending his rage, the Dark Paladin loses his ability bonuses, but regains the ability to use all skills. He may not use spells or spell-like abilities for a number of rounds equal to the duration of his Rage.
At the start of the second round of his rage, and every two rounds after, a medium shadow elemental is summoned. It is not under the Dark Paladin's control, although it attacks his enemies to the best of its ability. At 12 level, it grows to a large shadow elemental, and at 18th it grows to a huge. At the end of the Dark Paladin's rage, he suffers a stacking -1 circumstance penalty to all saves for every elemental he summoned.

Darkness (Sp): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin may cast the darkness spell on himself as a spell-like ability. The spell lasts for 10 minutes/class level, and may be cast at will.

Darkvision (Ex): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin gains darkvision out to 60 feet.

Mysteries (Su): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin gains the ability to cast mysteries from the list below. Full descriptions are found in Tome of Magic. He casts these mysteries spontaneously. His mysteries per day progress as a Wizard's spells per day, and he uses his Wisdom modifier to determine bonus Mysteries per day. The DC of his mysteries is 10 + the mystery level + Wisdom modifier. He gains access to the next level mystery at every odd level.

Caster Level: A Dark Paladin’s caster level is equal to his class level.


Mysteries


Cloak of Shadows
1 Steel Shadows: Gain +3 armor bonus and +3 shield bonus to AC.
2 Sight Eclipsed: Hide even when observed.
3 Sharp Shadows: Foes striking you take piercing
damage.
Dark Terrain
1 Carpet of Shadow: Transform the ground into shadowstuff, impeding movement.
2 Black Fire: Create fire in several squares that deals cold damage.
3 Clinging Darkness: Root foes in place.
Shutters and Clouds
1 Dusk and Dawn: Create an area of shadowy illumination.
2 Shadow Skin: Thicken your flesh with the power of shadow.
3 Dancing Shadows: Make subjects harder to hit.

Black Magic
4 Warp Spell: Steal the energy of another caster’s mystery or spell.
5 Echo Spell: Repeat a mystery or spell cast in the previous round.
6 Flood of Shadow: Casting in area is difficult; shadow mysteries and spells are empowered.
Body and Soul
4 Bolster: Grant subject temporary hit points.
5 Languor: Shadows weigh subjects down.
6 Shadow Investiture: Grant subject cold resistance 15, evasion, and ability to see in darkness.
Elemental Shadows
4 Aura of Shade: Subject is protected from cold and deals cold damage with attacks.
5 Dark Air or Water: As the spell control winds or control water.
6 Shadow Storm: Arcs of cold and electricity strike multiple targets.

Gained at 16th level:
7 Ephemeral Image: Create a shadow duplicate through which you can cast your magic.
8 Umbral Body: Transform into an incorporeal being of shadow.
9 Shadow Time: Act freely for 3 rounds.

Shadow Calling
7 Summon Umbral Servant: Summon shadow elementals to serve you.
8 Shadow Plague: A cloud of shadow energy deals 4d6 cold damage/round.
9 Army of Shadow: Summon shadow elementals to serve you.

Keen Senses (Ex): At 2nd level, and every 3 levels after until 17th, a Dark Paladin gains a +2 competency bonus to Spot and Listen checks. This stacks up to a total of +12 at 17th level. A Dark Paladin’s Piercing Gaze and True Seeing are extensions of this, and are denied to him should he be denied this ability.

Shadowfire Weapon (Su): At 2nd level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his weapons with shadowy fire as a swift action. On hit, they deal +1d6 of cold damage. This ability improves at 7th level, and they deal +1d10 of cold damage on a successful critical hit. This damage stacks with the on-hit damage. This ability lasts as long as desired, and persists during an Umbric Rage, although it cannot be activated during one.

Shadowy Haste (Ex): At 3rd level, whenever a Dark Paladin has concealment due to darkness, normal or magical, he gains the benefits of being under the haste spell.

Mettle (Ex): At 4th level, when a Dark Paladin makes a Will or Fort save that would normally result in reduced damage, he instead takes no damage. A failed save still results in full damage. At 12th level, this ability improves. A successful save still results in no damage, but a failed save results in half damage.

Shadow Armor (Su): At 4th level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his armor or skin with Shadow Armor as a swift action. He gains an AC bonus equal to 1 + his Wisdom modifier as the shadows about him become tangible. At 9th level, this ability improves. The shadows begin to absorb blows to his person, and he gains DR 4/magic. At 16th level, it improves once more, and he gains SR equal to 10 + his class level, rounded down. This ability lasts as long as desired, and persists during an Umbric Rage, although it cannot be activated during one.

Shadowjump (Su): At 6th level, a Dark Paladin gains the Shadowjump ability. This ability allows him to step between shadows as the dimension door spell, though it counts as a move action instead of a full round. You may use this ability for a total of distance of 10 feet per class level per day, and may split the distance traveled as desired.

Piercing Gaze (Ex): At 11th level, a Dark Paladin gains the Piercing Gaze ability. This ability allows him, when confronted with an illusion or disguise spell, to make a Will save to see through it. Additionally, it grants a +4 competency bonus to Spot checks against disguises. This is an extension of the Keen Senses ability, and is denied the Dark Paladin if Keen Senses is denied to him, as well.

Greater Umbric Rage (Ex): At 11th level, a Dark Paladin’s Umbric Rage ability is improved. His ability bonuses are increased to +6, and his Will bonus to +3.

True Seeing (Ex): At 17th level, a Dark Paladin gains the ability to see all things as they actually are. He sees through normal and magical darkness, notices secret doors hidden by magic, sees the exact locations of creatures or objects under blur or displacement effects, sees invisible creatures or objects normally, sees through illusions, and sees the true form of polymorphed, changed, or transmuted things. Further, he can focus his vision to see into the Ethereal Plane (but not into extradimensional spaces). The range of true seeing is 120 feet.

Tireless Umbric Rage (Ex): At 18th level, a Dark Paladin’s Rage becomes tireless. He no longer suffers the -1 circumstance penalties from his elementals, and may cast a number of spell like abilities equal to his Constitution modifier during the period they would normally be denied to him.

Mighty Umbric Rage (Ex): At 20th level, a Dark Paladin’s Umbric Rage ability is again improved. His ability bonuses increase to +8, and his Will bonus is increased to +4.

Infinite Shadow (Su): At 20th level, a Dark Paladin may use Infinite Shadow once per day. The area surrounding him out to a distance of 100 feet is cast into total darkness, for a number of rounds equal to 3 + his Wisdom modifier. This area is treated as though under the effects of the 'darkness' spell, cast as a 9th level spell. All creatures, even his allies, are subjected to a fear effect once per round for the duration of the spell. A successful Will save produces no effect on a creature, but failing one causes them to become panicked. Each creature also takes 10d6 cold damage each round, with a Fortitude save halving the damage. Both saves are class level + Wis modifier.


A panicked creature must drop anything it holds and flee at top speed from the source of its fear, as well as any other dangers it encounters, along a random path. It can’t take any other actions. In addition, the creature takes a -2 penalty on all saving throws, skill checks, and ability checks. If cornered, a panicked creature cowers. A panicked creature can use special abilities, including spells, to flee; indeed, the creature must use such means if they are the only way to escape.

Changelog:

10/16/12- Regularized progression of mysteries. Also significantly altered the capstone; upping the damage and making the saves more in line with similar abilities.

Debihuman
2012-06-03, 07:50 AM
Please remove the spoilers if you want critiques. It makes it harder to copy and paste correctly. Since this is not a standard class what kind of critique do you want?

Debby

RFLS
2012-06-03, 08:59 AM
I'd like to know if the class will function as intended, providing a melee beast with good battlefield control. I also want to know if I undershot it, and if any of the mechanics are poorly written, underpowered, or likely to result in a TPK.

toapat
2012-06-03, 09:22 AM
1st sugestion: bold ability names, it makes the post flow better and look less like it is a 20th level textwall of evil

2nd sugestion: Shadow armor's spell resistance is worthless, 10 SR at lvl 20 is bypassed without roll by an 11th level caster.

1st point: without any real divine feeling abilities, this guy comes off way more as a black knight then a campaign boss evil templar.

2nd point: No age. having the guidelines at the end of the list makes it look like it isnt there

3rd point: Darkness should be a spell like (Sp) ability, not a Supernatural (Sx), while true seeing should be Ex

RFLS
2012-06-03, 09:28 AM
1st sugestion: bold ability names, it makes the post flow better and look less like it is a 20th level textwall of evil

2nd sugestion: Shadow armor's spell resistance is worthless, 10 SR at lvl 20 is bypassed without roll by an 11th level caster.

1st point: without any real divine feeling abilities, this guy comes off way more as a black knight then a campaign boss evil templar.

2nd point: No age. having the guidelines at the end of the list makes it look like it isnt there

3rd point: Darkness should be a spell like (Sp) ability, not a Supernatural (Sx), while true seeing should be Ex

Edited to fix everything but the 1st and 2nd point. I don't quite follow what you mean with the 2nd one; what'd you mean there? As for the 1st point, yeah, he's definitely not a paladin, I agree. I started out basing it on the paladin class, and never got around to ctrl+f replace. I'll fix that as soon as I come up with a better name

toapat
2012-06-03, 09:41 AM
Edited to fix everything but the 1st and 2nd point. I don't quite follow what you mean with the 2nd one; what'd you mean there? As for the 1st point, yeah, he's definitely not a paladin, I agree. I started out basing it on the paladin class, and never got around to ctrl+f replace. I'll fix that as soon as I come up with a better name

the class information block should be mated to the class table, you have it after the class abilities, and it is missing the age modifier

Spell resistance is only as valuable as how often it can make an opponent waste a spell. spell resistance of anything below 10+class levels is useless as a result.

also, the spell list should be with the mysteries in a spoiler, not at the end of the post.

other sugestions: Give them Divine blow and Measure of conviction from my Templar (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=13289185&postcount=2) if you want a paladin feel

RFLS
2012-06-03, 10:13 AM
the class information block should be mated to the class table, you have it after the class abilities, and it is missing the age modifier

Spell resistance is only as valuable as how often it can make an opponent waste a spell. spell resistance of anything below 10+class levels is useless as a result.

also, the spell list should be with the mysteries in a spoiler, not at the end of the post.

other sugestions: Give them Divine blow and Measure of conviction from my Templar (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=13289185&postcount=2) if you want a paladin feel

The first three suggestions went right in. Also neatened up the formatting in general. If I added the Divine Blow and Measure of Conviction, how would you recommend they interact with Umbric Rage? I can't see those being used during it, but I could be wrong.

Also, now that I think about it, they may be an excellent replacement for Shadowfire Weapon and Improved Shadowfire Weapon, with (perhaps) some tweaking.

toapat
2012-06-03, 10:38 AM
The first three suggestions went right in. Also neatened up the formatting in general. If I added the Divine Blow and Measure of Conviction, how would you recommend they interact with Umbric Rage? I can't see those being used during it, but I could be wrong.

Also, now that I think about it, they may be an excellent replacement for Shadowfire Weapon and Improved Shadowfire Weapon, with (perhaps) some tweaking.

actually, Shadowfire weapon wouldnt need to be removed, just moved till later.
divine blow was made as an archmechanic to combine all the smite alignments together. Measure brought in to deal with the rather complex issue with wording in this lasts until your next turn effect.

asto interact with ubral rage: it can be used in rage as is, so why change that? this is supposed to be a guy that can take down a well balanced party with some effort.

also, proficiencies go under class abilities, and caster level goes under your spell mechanic

silphael
2012-06-03, 10:52 AM
The idea behind the Umbric Rage is a good one, but don't you think that's too much, one Shadow Elemental per round? Tha may make something like easily 30 shadow elemental by 20th level, and imagine if they are all huge.

Furthermore, where do they appear? They have no range of appearance.

Then, about mettle, the standard mettle is about "that would have a reduced effect on a successfull save", not only "that would make half damage". On this idea, I suggest giving him evasion too.

RFLS
2012-06-03, 11:25 AM
The idea behind the Umbric Rage is a good one, but don't you think that's too much, one Shadow Elemental per round? Tha may make something like easily 30 shadow elemental by 20th level, and imagine if they are all huge.

Furthermore, where do they appear? They have no range of appearance.


Hm...you're right, that would tip it from "powerful" to "probable TPK," which is not what I would want. How about, at the beginning of the Rage, a number of small elementals equal to 3 + Con or whatever are summoned, and they slowly grow over the course of the rage? What do you think? Also, for range, I'm thinking "appear randomly in a <x> foot radius, at DM's choosing."

Also, edited Mettle to reflect, you know, what's actually in the rules xD thanks, I missed that

@Toapat- I'm not entirely sure that Divine Blow fits (the alignment part). How would you recommend working it in? As I said, this class did start based on the Paladin, but that's not really where it's at now. "Dark Warrior" or "Black Knight" would be more appropriate if they weren't so cliche. Maybe "Duskblade." Oh wait... xD But yeah. Definitely not a Paladin anymore, although I do like the core "get better at hitting people better once a day" mechanic.

toapat
2012-06-03, 11:50 AM
@Toapat- I'm not entirely sure that Divine Blow fits (the alignment part). How would you recommend working it in? As I said, this class did start based on the Paladin, but that's not really where it's at now. "Dark Warrior" or "Black Knight" would be more appropriate if they weren't so cliche. Maybe "Duskblade." Oh wait... xD But yeah. Definitely not a Paladin anymore, although I do like the core "get better at hitting people better once a day" mechanic.

divine blow is a smite morally ambiguous, sure you can just give the class the blackgaurd's smite good, but that makes this class go from being a fun excersize in grey areas to definitively evil

RFLS
2012-06-03, 01:11 PM
Yeah, it's definitely supposed to be a grey area kinda class. The character I'm designing it for is Neutral.

Hm...How about this?

Weapon of Shadow (Su): Starting at 2nd level, a Dark Paladin can channel pure darkness into his weapon a number of times per day equal to his Rages per day, gaining an attack bonus equal to his Wisdom modifier, and dealing extra damage equal to his class level for one normal melee attack.

Shadowfire Weapon (Su): Starting at 7th level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his weapons with shadowy fire as a swift action. On hit, they deal +1d6 + his Wisdom modifier of cold damage.

Weapon of Darkness (Su): At 13th level, a Dark Paladin's Weapon of Shadow and Shadowfire Weapon abilities improve. His Weapon of Shadow ability now applies for all attacks made in one round, and his Shadowfire Weapon ability now deals +1d10 + his Wisdom modifier of cold damage on a successful critical hit. This damage stacks with the on-hit damage.

EDIT: Oh, I realized something. These abilities couldn't be activated during Umbric Rage because they're spell-like abilities. The Shadowfire Weapon persists if previously activated, though. I need to edit its entry to reflect that.

RFLS
2012-06-04, 11:45 PM
Overall, how does everyone think this stands up to the goals I set? Does anyone see any major flaws/exploits? Is it too strong or, heaven forbid, too weak?

Techwarrior
2012-06-05, 07:59 PM
I think the real problem you're going to face with this is the infamous action economy. A party of 4 gets 4 actions per round. So this guy needs to be able to take that, and still churn out similar numbers. There are two ways to go about this, give him lots moar hp's, which is cheesy and not entertaining, or give him a way to take additional actions a round. This was a lot easier in 2nd and 3.0, 3.5 presents a much bigger challenge. I'm not actually sure how I would try and do that, if at will still meant the same as 2nd: the 2nd edition version of a free action, I'd suggest making his spells at will actions. However, at will in 3.5, to my knowledge, just means that he can do it as many times as he wants. 3.0 Haste gave a partial action, making it possible to cast a spell and then full attack. If you also had quickened spells, you could cast 2 spells and full attack. That makes a monster a very serious threat. You could give all of his spells the Quicken Spell feat for free, and then houserule 3.0 haste.

RFLS
2012-06-05, 11:54 PM
What do you think about making all of his spells swift actions, and his armor/weapon buffs free actions? He's already getting haste ~90% of the time anyway.

Deepbluediver
2012-06-06, 10:36 AM
The summoning of shadow elementals during Umbric Rage is very interesting, but since the characters can't end the rage early, and the elementals will just vanish anyway, I worry that battles will become very formulaic. Combat Starts > anti-paladin rages > group hunkers down and piles on the defensive moves or just flees until the rage ends > group resumes attack.
I might change it to something like: every round has a 30% chance to summon an elemental, but the elementals don't dissapear when the rage ends.

If he encounters your player's characters very early on, depending on what his bonuses and equipment is like, Shadowfire Weapon has the potential to one-shot the group's squishier members; just be careful where you apply it.

Is there any reason to NOT just have Shadow Armor on 24/7? Since there's no cost and no downside (as far as I can see) why not just make it a passive bonus?



Since you've plotted out all 20 levels, I assume this class is going to be for a recurring character. In order to really be a challenge for your characters, he should probably be a few levels higher than them every time they meet. This will give him a few more HD, better saves, more attacks, etc. Tactics are also important; having him start combat from an ambush might allow you to knock at least one enemy out of the fight right away (so long as it's not the same player each time).

Your other option is to give him minions or servants to help him out. Having multiple characters in your arsenal can help divert attention if he's getting hammered, and gives you a second line of attack if this guy gets locked down. With a little effort, it shouldn't be to much trouble to keep the main character focus on this guy, but provide him with some support in case it's needed.

One last thing; if this character is going to be used repeatedly, then there is going to be a need for him to either flee or let the group escape. A lot of his abilities seem to have no limit, so it's not like he can run out of resources except HP. If he's winning the fight and the group tries to run, is there any logical reason he shouldn't pursue them? Minions might help is this aspect; if they die he'll run away.
Also, if the dark paladin needs to escape, then some kind of long-range teleport move or flying mount that can swoop in and pick him up would probably be valuable.

Debihuman
2012-06-07, 06:49 AM
My corrections are in red, except for capitalization. It should be "dark paladin" not Dark Paladin. Spells should be italicized for clarity.


Proficiencies: A dark paladin is proficient with light, medium, and heavy armor. He is also proficient with all simple and martial weapons.

This is fine.


Umbric Rage (Ex): At 1st level, a dark paladin may enter an umbric rage once per day, for a number of rounds equal to 3 + his Constitution modifier. During this time, the dark paladin gains +4 Strength, +4 Constitution, and +4 Dexterity.

Must add "+" or it look like his strength, constitution and dexterity change to 4 and that would stink. You should note how the extra hit points are temporary and that they go away after the rage ends. Do they go away first or not? These should not be permanently gained.


He also gains a +2 morale bonus to his Will saves. During this time, he may not cast any spells or spell like abilities known to him, nor may he use magical items that take conscious effort from the user. Additionally, he may not use the Concentration skill, or any charisma- or intelligence-based skills. Upon ending his rage, the dark paladin loses his ability bonuses, but regains the ability to use all skills. He may not use spells or spell-like abilities for a number of rounds equal to the duration of his Rage. Additionally, he takes a -1 circumstance penalty to all saves for the rest of the encounter.

Change exhaustion penalty to circumstance penalty. Otherwise it look like he become Exhausted as the condition.


While Raging, a Shadow Elemental is summoned once per round at the beginning of the Dark Paladin’s turn, and is dismissed when the Dark Paladin at the end of the round in which the Dark Paladin ceases his Rage. Summoned Shadow Elementals attack a Dark Paladin’s enemies, though they are not under his control. At 1st through 6th level, these Elementals are small. At 6th through 12th, they’re medium. At 12th through 18th, they become large. Finally, at 18th through 20th, they become huge.

Whoa! Stop Right ThERE! Can you say TPK? summoning a shadow elemental once per round is TPK for a party. This should be a spell-like or supernatural ability and not connected to raging. I think this should be an alternative to the rage. He can either rage or summon the elemental but not both.

Here is how it should look:

Summon Shadow Elemental (Su): Once per day at 1st level , a dark paladin may summon a Small shadow elemental instead of raging. A dark paladin may either rage or summon an elemental but cannot do both at the same time. The shadow elemental attacks for one round per level of the dark paladin and can be dismissed.

At 6th level, the dark paladin can summon a Medium shadow elemental; at 12th level the dark paladin can summon a Large shadow elemental; and at 18th level, the dark paladin can summon a Huge shadow elemental.

If you wanted, you could make this ability available more than just once a day at higher levels.


Darkness (Sp): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin may cast the darkness spell on himself as a spell-like ability.

This needs frequency and duration.


Darkvision (Ex): At 1st level, a Dark Paladin gains darkvision out to 60 feet.

This is fine.


Keen Senses (Ex): At 2nd level, and every 3 levels after until 17th, a dark paladin gains a +2 competency bonus to Spot and Listen checks. This stacks up to a total of +12 at 17th level. A dark paladin’s Piercing Gaze and True Seeing are extensions of this, and are denied to him should he be denied this ability.

This seems fine.



Shadowfire Weapon (Su): At 2nd level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his weapons with shadowy fire as a swift action. On hit, a dark paladin deals an additional 1d6 plus his Wisdom modifier of cold damage. This ability improves at 7th level, and deals an additional 1d10 plus his Wisdom modifier of cold damage on a successful critical hit. This damage stacks with the on-hit damage. This ability lasts as long as desired, and persists during an Umbric Rage, although it cannot be activated during one.

Imbuing a weapon should be a standard action not a swift action. This should be a once a day ability at 2nd level and improve to 3/day. If it lasts as long as desired, it is effectively a permanent ability and that is overpowered.


Shadowy Haste (Ex): At 3rd level, whenever a dark paladin has concealment due to darkness, normal or magical, he gains the benefits of being under the haste spell.

This is fine,.


Mettle (Ex): At 4th level, when a dark paladin makes a Will or Fort save that would normally result in reduced damage, he instead takes no damage. A failed save still results in full damage. At 12th level, this ability improves. A successful save still results in no damage, but a failed save results in half damage.

This is fine,


Shadow Armor (Su): At 4th level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his armor or skin with Shadow Armor as a swift action. He gains an AC bonus equal to 1 + his Wisdom modifier as the shadows about him become tangible. At 9th level, this ability improves. The shadows begin to absorb blows to his person, and he gains DR 4/magic. At 16th level, it improves once more, and he gains SR equal to 10 + his class level, rounded down. This ability lasts as long as desired, and persists during an Umbric Rage, although it cannot be activated during one.

Way overpowered as written. Imbuing an item should be a standard action not a swift action. Duration should never be "as long as desired." It should last 1 hour/level.



Mysteries (Sp): At 5th level, a Dark Paladin may cast mysteries from Dark Terrain, Cloak of Shadows, and Shutters and Clouds. He may cast these mysteries a number of times equal to his Wisdom modifier per day.

At 10th level, this improves, and he may cast mysteries from Body and Soul, Black Magic, and Elemental Shadows a number of times equal to his Wisdom modifier per day. Additionally, he may cast his original mysteries at will, though casting the same mystery multiple times does not stack its effects.

At 16th level, it improves again, and he may cast from Shadow Calling and Dark Metamorphosis. He may cast the each of the spells in these paths once per day. He may also cast all of his previous mysteries at will, though casting the same mystery with the same target multiple times does not stack its effects. The save DC for these mysteries is 10 + mystery level + your Charisma modifier.

Caster Level: A Dark Paladin’s caster level is equal to his class level.


It needs paragraph breaks and should be a spell-like not supernatural ability. It has a spell-like save. Note: The saving throw (if any) against a spell-like ability is: 10 + the level of the spell the ability resembles or duplicates + the creature’s Cha modifier. This should be consistent.

You need to define your spells/mysteries better. How long do the effects last? How many shadow elementals make up an army? This whole section needs to be refined.


Shadowjump (Su): At 6th level, a dark paladin gains the Shadowjump ability. This ability allows him to step between shadows as the dimension door spell, though it counts as a move action instead of a full round. You may use this ability for a total of distance of 10 feet per class level per day, and may split the distance traveled as desired.

Seems fine,


Piercing Gaze (Ex): At 11th level, a dark Paladin gains the Piercing Gaze ability. This ability allows him, when confronted with an illusion or disguise spell, to make a Will save to see through it. Additionally, it grants a +4 competency bonus to Spot checks against disguises. This is an extension of the Keen Senses ability, and is denied the Dark Paladin if Keen Senses is denied to him, as well.

Greater Umbric Rage (Ex): At 11th level, a Dark Paladin’s Umbric Rage ability is improved. His ability bonuses are increased to +6, and his Will bonus to +3.

True Seeing (Ex): At 17th level, a Dark Paladin gains the ability to see all things as they actually are. He sees through normal and magical darkness, notices secret doors hidden by magic, sees the exact locations of creatures or objects under blur or displacement effects, sees invisible creatures or objects normally, sees through illusions, and sees the true form of polymorphed, changed, or transmuted things. Further, he can focus his vision to see into the Ethereal Plane (but not into extradimensional spaces). The range of true seeing is 120 feet.

These are fine.


Tireless Umbric Rage (Ex): At 18th level, a dark paladin’s Rage becomes tireless. He no longer suffers the -1 circumstance penalty, and may cast a number of spell like abilities equal to his Constitution modifier during the period they would normally be denied to him. His Shadow Elementals persist for one round after he ceases his Rage.

Since the exhaust penalty (not bonus) was changed earlier, I made the change here as well. Since the summon shadow elemental ability was removed from rage and made its own ability, this sentence no longer applies.


Mighty Umbric Rage (Ex): At 20th level, a dark paladin’s Umbric Rage ability is again improved. His ability bonuses increase to +8, and his Will bonus is increased to +4.

This clarifies which bonuses increase.


Infinite Shadow (Su): At 20th level, a dark paladin gains Infinite Shadow ability. The area surrounding him out to a distance of 100 feet is cast into total darkness, for a number of rounds equal to 3 + his Wisdom modifier. All creatures, even his allies, are subjected to a fear effect once per round for the duration of the spell. A successful Will save produces no effect on a creature, but failing one moves them to the next level of fear. Normal becomes Shaken, Shaken becomes Frightened, and Frightened becomes Panicked. Panicked creatures suffer no effect. Each creature must also make a Fortitude save each round of the effect or take 1d4 damage. Both saves are 20 + Wisdom modifier DC.

This is the Panicked condition:
A panicked creature must drop anything it holds and flee at top speed from the source of its fear, as well as any other dangers it encounters, along a random path. It can’t take any other actions. In addition, the creature takes a -2 penalty on all saving throws, skill checks, and ability checks. If cornered, a panicked creature cowers. A panicked creature can use special abilities, including spells, to flee; indeed, the creature must use such means if they are the only way to escape.

This should be included in your text.

The DC for supernatural abilities is 10 + 1/2 creature's HD + Charisma modifier. Please respect that. This should be consistent.

Debby

RFLS
2012-06-17, 04:11 PM
@Deepbluediver: I very much like your suggestion for Umbric Rage, I'll implement something or something like it. Additionally, I've edited the text for Shadow Armor to reflect that it has a visual effect; reason enough to not make it a passive bonus. It's almost entirely a stylistic thing, I just like the idea of his armor looking like it's actually made of shadows.

@Debby: Woah. This took me a while to go through; thank you very much for all the input. Most/all of your technical edits were added. Here's what I'm doing/not doing/changing in response to the things that aren't technical/typos:

Darkness: Edited to reflect duration and frequency.

Umbric Rage: During the second round of the dark paladin's rage, and every second round thereafter, a medium shadow elemental is summoned. These elementals are not under his control, although they attack his nearby enemies. These elementals persist after his rage ends. At 12th level, they become large elementals. Finally, at 18th level, they become huge elementals.
Additionally, for every elemental summoned, the dark paladin takes a stacking -1 circumstance penalty for the rest of the encounter.

This is in response to both your and Deepbluediver's suggestions about the Rage. I very much want the summoning to happen during the rage; this is not supposed to be an ability he has control over. The players should feel as though the very shadows are rising to fight them.


Shadowfire Weapon (Su): At 2nd level, a Dark Paladin may imbue his weapons with shadowy fire as a swift action. On hit, a dark paladin deals an additional 1d6 of cold damage. This ability improves at 7th level, and deals an additional 1d10 of cold damage on a successful critical hit. This damage stacks with the on-hit damage. This ability lasts as long as desired, and persists during an Umbric Rage, although it cannot be activated during one.

This is in response to your concern over this ability. Again; he's supposed to be able to go 1v5 and have a shot at winning. I removed this bonus Wisdom modifier damage


The Shadow Armor ability I'm leaving alone. I absolutely agree that it is overpowered; however, that's rather the point of the whole class. I'd modify it before I ever let a player get their hands on it, though. The reason for the swift instead of standard action is the biggest problem I faced in making this class was the rather lopsided action economy.


Mysteries- these are lifted whole-sale from the Tome of Magic Shadowcaster class. As such, I didn't bother including the whole text. However, I am editing it to be spell-like abilities. The saving throw will remain at 10 + mystery level + Wisdom modifier, mostly because Wisdom is this class's whole schtick.


Infinite Shadow: I'm leaving it as is. We don't play into Epic levels, and as above, Wisdom is this class's whole schtick.

Cipher Stars
2012-06-19, 11:47 PM
Infinite Shadow doesn't feel very infinite.

100ft/level is more appropriate. And save DC = class levels + 10 + Wis.

Then it'd be a proper capstone, especially considering many characters and enemies are immune to fear at those levels, and many more being resistant.

RFLS
2012-06-20, 08:47 AM
Yeah, you're probably right- it's been edited to be more of an "oh****" ability for his enemies. Upped damage, and modified save. The fear effect is now immediate panic. I also edited it to reflect the panicked condition, as Debihuman requested.

@Cipherthe3vil- how's the capstone feel now? Capstone-y?

Cipher Stars
2012-06-20, 09:45 AM
Yeah, you're probably right- it's been edited to be more of an "oh****" ability for his enemies. Upped damage, and modified save. The fear effect is now immediate panic. I also edited it to reflect the panicked condition, as Debihuman requested.

@Cipherthe3vil- how's the capstone feel now? Capstone-y?


Not really. I couldn't imagine it being more then a 6th level spell.
Range.
More damage. Only 1d8? lol. 1d8/4 levels and 100ft/level or 100ft/2 levels. Then it'd be capstone-y.

RFLS
2012-10-16, 01:17 PM
Not really. I couldn't imagine it being more then a 6th level spell.
Range.
More damage. Only 1d8? lol. 1d8/4 levels and 100ft/level or 100ft/2 levels. Then it'd be capstone-y.

After a looooong break, I've come back to clean the class up a little. Shameless bump in the hopes of getting more feedback.