[3.XP] Luxury items

[Emo_Duck]

In a now defunct Pathfinder campaign with an Arabic theme, I played a Bloatmage vizier who, rather than walking, had his own little 5x5 ft. flying carpet, so he didn't have to walk anywhere. Add in copious castings of Mage Hand and Unseen Servant, as well as using Shrink Item to bring along a luxurious pavilion tent and foodstuffs, and the trend is set.

Now I'm playing in a new Pathfinder game, this time gestalting as a Transmuter//Alchemist, and going for Bloatmage on the Wizard side. We're still level 1, so there's a limited budget for luxury items, but I'm considering taking the Craft Wondrous Items feat in order to create them more cheaply as the game goes on.

What items (and spells) are there that facilitate being lazy and gluttonous? Both Pathfinder and D&D 3.x material is welcome.

[Demonic_Spoon]

There's that portable shade item in the pfsrd. Never hold up a parasol again!

[jaybird]

Prestidigitation. Just...Prestidigitation. Also, Protection from Elements is nice.

[Demonic_Spoon]

Found the item, Dyso's Travel Canopy (http://www.d20pfsrd.com/magic-items/wondrous-items/wondrous-items/c-d/dyso-s-travel-canopy)!

Walking too much trouble? Animated object armchair or bed! Or use the pendulate divan (http://www.d20pfsrd.com/magic-items/wondrous-items/wondrous-items/m-p/pendulate-divan-of-emperor-fortigre-the), which seems to have been designed for the lazy.

Amulet of Warmth from Races of the Dragon means you'll never be too cold or to hot ever again!

Is breathing too much of a bother? Not to worry, a Iridescent spindle ioun stone means that you don't need to anymore!

Tired of having to do stuff? Get a simulacrum (http://www.d20pfsrd.com/magic/all-spells/s/simulacrum) and have him do it for you! Programmed image may work for the really dull stuff.

Are adventures or whatever cutting into your valuable naptime? Use the wayfinder of the sleeping eye (http://www.d20pfsrd.com/magic-items/wondrous-items/wondrous-items/r-z/wayfinder-of-the-sleeping-eye) to deal with such mundane chores.

EDIT: MOAR LUXURY

Gravity getting you down? Create a manifest zone to a no gravity or light gravity plane(possibly using a power stone?), summon up a oak tree with a feather token, and use a eternal wand of acorn of far travel to always be treated as being in the manifest zone, and as such under the effects of light or no gravity(your choice). A telekinetic sphere should also work.

Talking too much of a hassle? Get telepathy somehow(mindbender dip is popular), or make a permanced telepathic bond with a "speaker" simulacrum attendant that accompanies you at all times.

EDIT2: Luxury Reloaded

The mundane means of gaining pleasure too much trouble? A nipple clamp of pleasurable pain(Or some such, I forget the exact name, BoVD) and a symbol of pain means pleasure on demand! User discretion advised.

Cant be bothered to age? There's a ioun stone for that. Playing a Elan is advised in any case.

EDIT3: Luxury?

Drugs, and lots of them. Using liquid pain is described as giving intense pleasure, so yeah. Or whatever. Beware addiction penalties, though I think there's a spell for that.

EDIT4: Continuous item of favor of ilmater to not be nausated by your indulgent diet. Plus it protects you from a bloatmage's sickening if your blood pool is larger than your bloatmage levels.

Want to sleep less? Ring of sustenance.

EDIT5: Don't want to waste any of your precious time actually reading books? A item of at will scholar's touch is just what you need!

[Emo_Duck]

Awesome additions, Demonic_Spoon. I'll definitely be noting some of those down. :)

The speaker's simulacrum caught my eye, and I realised that taking Improved Familiar to get a Fairy Dragon at level 7 would also work for that purpose, as it has telepathy. In fact, as it casts spells like a level 3 sorcerer, it vould be put in charge of keeping up Unseen Servant (perhaps with a lesser Extend Spell rod) for those too lazy to even cast spells. :smallbiggrin:

[doko239]

Not exactly the original "pure laziness" idea, but there's rules in Pathfinder Ultimate Combat for gold-plated and solid-gold weapons and armor:

Gold

Typically only used for ceremonial weapons and armor, metal equipment made from gold is fragile, heavy, and expensive. Often golden armor is gold-plated rather than constructed entirely from gold. The rules below are for the rare item constructed entirely of gold rather than being gold-plated.

Gold-plated items triple the base cost of weapons and armor and have the same properties as the item the gold is plating. Items constructed purely of gold cost 10 times the normal cost for items of their type. Gold items weigh 50% more than typical weapons or armor of their type.

Weapons: Gold is often too soft to hold a decent edge, but light weapons that do piercing or slashing damage can be constructed of gold or some nearly gold alloy. They take a –2 penalty on damage rolls (minimum 1 damage).

Gold weapons have a hardness of half their base weapons' and also have the fragile quality.

Armor: Gold can be fashioned into light or medium metal armor. The softness and the weight of the metal decrease the armor/shield bonus by 2, and increase the armor check penalty by 2. Gold armor has a hardness of 5.


Fragile: Fragile weapons and armor cannot take the beating that sturdier weapons can. A fragile weapon gains the broken condition if the wielder rolls a natural 1 on an attack roll with the weapon. If a fragile weapon is already broken, the roll of a natural 1 destroys it instead.

Armor with the fragile quality falls apart when hit with heavy blows. If an attacker hits a creature wearing fragile armor with an attack roll of a natural 20 and confirms the critical hit (even if the creature is immune to critical hits), the armor gains the broken condition. If already broken, the armor is destroyed instead. Fragile armor is not broken or destroyed by critical threats that are not generated by natural 20s, so if a creature wielding a weapon with a 19–20 or 18–20 critical range scores a critical hit on the wearer of this armor with a roll of less than a natural 20, that critical hit has no chance to break or destroy the armor.

Masterwork and magical fragile weapons and armor lack these flaws unless otherwise noted in the item description or the special material description.