Special Weapon for a Melee Pizzamancer?

[Uhtred]

So the group of friends I DM for has come to be known as the Fellowship of the Pizza. No matter the game, no matter the character, when these six people and I sit down at a game table, there is pizza, there is talk of pizza. Pizza has become both a mainstay and a running gag with our group which has wholly embraced Quest for Glory's insistence that the world is made of five main elements: earth, fire, air, water, and pizza.
The gang are going their separate ways this Saturday, and I wanted to give them a great send off, a memorable end to five years of aiming together. So I have statted out a Pizzamancer and his pet Elder Pizza Elemental (scaled up the Calzone Elemental) complete with spells and the like, but for his Melee weapon I wanted something very special: a sword-sized Adamantine pizza cutter. Obviously magic, obviously enchanted. And I'm having difficulty trying to puzzle out a weapon like that. I was thinking of taking scimitar stats and going from there, maybe? The goal is that the party's fighter will take this thing up and use it to vanquish the pizza elemental, in the grand tradition of the BBEG leaving the one weapon that will undo his Evil Machinations either on his person or in his presence. Also I will provide Pizzamancer/Pizza Elemental stats to any interested parties. They're loads of fun. :)

[killianh]

1. Keen is a must (what's worse than trying to cut a pizza and it not slicing right?) Wounding would be nice (I've cut my fingers on a pizza slicer many times before) and depending on the level vorpal might be good too. Maybe give it fleshgrinding from BoVD.

2. Please for the love of god PM me those monsters :smallbiggrin: I have a campaign I'm working on that runs entirely off of gag encounters like that (party alignment will be chaotic stupid)

[Popertop]

Well to make a weapon that is good against a pizza elemental we need to know what it is vulnerable to.

Maybe give it Keen and Flaming Burst to over cook the pizza?

He loses his powers once he is no longer delicious.

[Andvare]

A khopesh popped up in my mind the instant you mentioned a pizza cutter weapon.

http://wiki.chronicles-of-blood.com/images/thumb/Weapons-Khopesh.jpg/600px-Weapons-Khopesh.jpg

Now, it might not be a wheel, but it sure looks like it can cut a pizza.


Also, beware of Pizza the Hut! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33n-IS8a1S4)


Edit: If a pizza elemental loses its powers when it is no longer delicious, the sword would have to have the evil power of "bestow anchovies". That should take care of that.

[Novawurmson]

Just had pizza last night...and this morning. Probably will have some leftover pizza tonight!

I think it should allow the user to cast Grease at-will.

[Uhtred]

I love the khopesh idea, maybe up the critical by a bit, make it an x3 to account for the spinning blade, 1d8 slashing? Crit 18/20?
When I statted out the Pizza Elemental I actually gave it Fire Immunity, since the Elemental Plane of Pizza is so near the Elemental Plane of Fire, and because Pizza spends enough time in an oven not to be hurt by it. I also ruled that it was Cold Immune too, since cold pizza is just as awesome as hot pizza. So it's vulnerable to slashing and desiccation, because pizza becomes a stale, gummy mess when it dries out. Blech. So it looks like I need to look at Sandstorm enchantments? I'm afb at the moment, are there any good ones there?

[Eldan]

Just make sure to include a clause that Pizza Elementals aren't immune to critical hits like normal elementals.

How about Pizza-bane? LIke the various bane enchantments, for the [Pizza] subtype?

[Keld Denar]

Doesn't Secrets of Sarlona have a wheel weapon? Some weird and crappy monk weapon?

EDIT: Cutting Wheel, page 135-136, 1d6 Light Exotic 19-20, P and S

[Telonius]

Blade of the Noid. Deals extra cold damage to pizza elementals.

[herrhauptmann]

Instead of an adamant pizza cutter, use Green Starmetal. (From whichever book introduced the greenstar adept) Extra damage against extraplanars while on the prime material. Otherwise identical to adamant.

[Uhtred]

Blade of the Noid. Deals extra cold damage to pizza elementals.

Wouldn't the Blade of the Noid be more likely to grant you Evasion or Uncanny Dodge? To avoid the Noid? Unless it's the Noid's actual weapon, in which case it grants the equivalent of a Haste spell. I like either option.


Instead of an adamant pizza cutter, use Green Starmetal. (From whichever book introduced the greenstar adept) Extra damage against extraplanars while on the prime material. Otherwise identical to adamant.

I like the Starmetal idea. I like it a lot. As long as the Pizza Elemental has legitimately been summoned forth from the Elemental Plane of Pizza, it will rock pretty hard. I'm having a hard time deciding between the Pizza Elemental or a Pizza Golem, though. The Pizzamancer's build could go either summoning or construct creation. Hmmm.

[Andvare]

Wouldn't the Blade of the Noid be more likely to grant you Evasion or Uncanny Dodge? To avoid the Noid? Unless it's the Noid's actual weapon, in which case it grants the equivalent of a Haste spell. I like either option.



I like the Starmetal idea. I like it a lot. As long as the Pizza Elemental has legitimately been summoned forth from the Elemental Plane of Pizza, it will rock pretty hard. I'm having a hard time deciding between the Pizza Elemental or a Pizza Golem, though. The Pizzamancer's build could go either summoning or construct creation. Hmmm.

Is the mighty pizza created through caring labour, with many hours of dough stomping and magical enhanced taste buds tasting, creating just the right essence of pizza.
Or is it called forth from the mighty oven of creation (of DOOM! +2)? From which worlds (of flavour) are created, where daemons frolic in the river of red (tomato (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ojNoN83CpPQ&feature=player_detailpage#t=33s)) and devils play hopscotch in the river of yellow. And green angels look down on creation from up high*.


*Oregano

[Kerilstrasz]

(party alignment will be chaotic stupid)

oh... c'mmon...
i red that 10 mins ago and still rofling!

[Eldan]

I like the Starmetal idea. I like it a lot. As long as the Pizza Elemental has legitimately been summoned forth from the Elemental Plane of Pizza, it will rock pretty hard. I'm having a hard time deciding between the Pizza Elemental or a Pizza Golem, though. The Pizzamancer's build could go either summoning or construct creation. Hmmm.

That depends on what kind of jokes you want to make about the Pizzamancer.

If the built a golem, make bakery jokes. Give him a giant shovel, and the ability to swing discs of dough around over his head and throw them, like nets.

If he summoned an elemental, he can explain that the ritual didn't need any material components since it took more than 30 minutes for the called elemental to arrive.

[Popertop]

So it looks like I need to look at Sandstorm enchantments? I'm afb at the moment, are there any good ones there?

There unfortunately are only three.

They do seem to be very relevant, though.

Dessicating (+2): Activate it to deal 1d6 extra dessication damage (1d8 vs plants and water elementals)

Dessicating Burst (+3): Extra dessication damage on crit. This gets a little better for us I guess since we were thinking about using a high-crit weapon anyway. Still a little expensive, but if the enemy is vulnerable, I'd say its worth it. Extra damage follows the normal formula for the burst weapons, except that each d10 of damage is 2d8 versus plants and water elementals, so it looks like this:

x2 1d10 (2d8)
x3 2d10 (4d8)
x4 3d10 (6d8)

I quite like dessicating burst as an enchantment actually. Plus in a normal campaign you can really play up the rarity of a desert weapon.


The last enchantment is Duststorm (+3): Can only place it on a melee weapon
This lets you cast the spell Haboob by swinging the weapon around your head provoking AoO (3/day). Haboob is a spell from Sandstorm that is basically a level 3 Fog Cloud (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/fogCloud.htm) with abrasive sand. If you have the book in your collection you should definitely look it up, it has no-save damage if you voluntarily stay in the spells area at the end of your turn, plus the usual fog cloud goodies.

The Duststorm enchantment is more for your villain, you could safely re-flavor the spell to throw spicy pepper instead (Yes pun was intended :smalltongue:), plus the weapon enchantment goes with the whole "Swirls dough around his head" idea.

[ericgrau]

If the weapon lets you cast anything it should be as a swift action so that you can cast it and slash in the same round. Especially low level spells like grease. Or as a standard action it should be so strong (meatier swarm?) that you sometimes want to do it instead of slashing.

The pizza elemental could have DR / adamantine and slashing as part of his weakness to the blade. The pizza cutter should be the best attack to use but it shouldn't be the only way unless you're absolutely certain that the players are trying to take it. For example if you have a long plot arc to figure out his weakness before fighting him, as there is news of his seeming invulnerability. You might also give him high resistance to fire, some resistance to electricity and immunity or high resistance to cold. That fits the theme (pizza ovens are very hot, electric cooking, and cold or frozen pizza is still good) but also negates some of the heaviest damage types. He might respond to them with "You fools, I was born in a 900 degree pizza oven!" From there he might be immune to mind affecting effects and so on too. Probably some SR.

[Doc_Pippin]

Give him an animated Pepperoni Shield... Orb of pizza spell would be funny, cheese Web, polymorph other (into a pizza), Create (greater) unFed, permanent image (of deliciousness), flesh to Pizza and pizza to flesh, wall of pizza, Black tentacles (but cheese), Halt unfed, control unfed, Hold unfed... thats it for now give me a few mins i might think of some more

I love the Meatier Shower Idea I was also thinking of the spell I can't remember atm but it spawns a house to live in... make it out of pizza.. a hut of pizza... And to the party members who have the intelligence to attempt to eat the elemental make it's deliciousness something like hero's feast

The Pizza Elemental should swollow someone whole causing (x) damage from scalding greese until the trapped person eats his way out, also anyone who hasn't eaten that day is effected by the feeblemind spell while arounf the Pizza Elemental.

As For the Weapon I think it would be something like 1D10 Slashing 19-20x2
+ add Keen, [pizza] bane and Acid burst (HEART BURN) make sure to give him energy substitution (Pizza)

Another Idea is a Pizza demon... I have the thoughts of like a balrog from LOTR wearing a pizza deliver uniform and wielding a sharpened breadstick in one hand and a whip of pizza cheese in the other while breathing scalding hot oil plus it gives way to the greateast cheese=constipation joke "IT SHALL NOT PASS!!!!!!!!"

[Andvare]

For a Meatier Shower, there is always this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=BPH0ct2oXBg#t=108s) for inspiration.