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View Full Version : Alan Wake Vs The Langoliers



Triscuitable
2012-10-27, 03:11 AM
I've always enjoyed the works of Stephen King. He manages to create horrific, yet engaging worlds (well, world, as most of his work is united in one world, as shown by The Dark Tower, IT, Under the Dome, The Shawshank Redemption, 11/22/63, etc.) that bring the creatures in it to life.

One of these creatures is the unity known as the Langoliers. These are creatures that in a sense, exist in the past, devouring the now-useless timelines, and anything in them. Nobody other than the Langoliers exist in these timelines (I suppose they've quite literally moved on), but if someone were to exist in one of these timelines, they'd also be devoured.

Minor spoilers to a fantastic 2 year old game you should have already played. It's really good.

Enter Alan Wake, the New York based author who takes a vacation in Bright Falls, Washington (it does not exist, which I can confirm as someone who's grown up all their life here). Of course, there's a lake in Bright Falls that seems to bring the worlds writers envision to life, so long as the writer has been present in the cabin at one point or another.

If you're familiar with Alan Wake's American Nightmare, Alan found himself in one of the episodes of a TV show he used to write for. He faced the Taken once again, just as he usually did back in Alan Wake. The Taken are beings possessed by the Dark Presence, which means that they're invincible when shrouded in the darkness. However, they become weaker when light is shown upon them, and are stunned almost entirely by something as simple as a flashlight.

Let's play a little fun game (don't actually pick up a controller, please), and say Stephen King was present in the cabin to have written The Langoliers. Alan's presence at the cabin at Cauldron Lake brings him into the world of The Langoliers, only with the Taken making their presence known as well. Thus, the Langoliers are Taken in this world.

The only beings in this world are Alan, the Taken Langoliers, the being holding Alan in this world, the malevolent Mr. Scratch (let's disregard American Nightmare for that one), and whoever (or whatever) Alan is able to write into existence for the story. The characters from the novel are present, but because they're fighting their own seperate battles, will be considered target practice for Mr. Scratch or the Taken Langoliers.

Mr. Scratch is merely present. He is not an enemy Alan will have to face in battle. His presence is merely a goal for Alan to have (light Mr. Scratch up so the world falls apart and frees Alan).

Alan has a .44 revolver and a heavy-duty flashlight. He's up against the Langoliers that will either eat him or eat the past (whichever happens first) if he can't stop Mr. Scratch. This is less about who wins in direct combat, and whether or not Alan would have even the slightest chance of survival.

GloatingSwine
2012-10-27, 06:41 PM
Alan sees what the Langoliers actually look like and, like TV audiences the world over, dies of asphyxiation due to uncontrollable laughter.

Triscuitable
2012-10-27, 06:55 PM
Alan sees what the Langoliers actually look like and, like TV audiences the world over, dies of asphyxiation due to uncontrollable laughter.

I'm sad to admit this is probably how he'd react if they weren't actively trying to devour him, or if he weren't distracted by his own internal monologues.

Also, novel, not miniseries! I can't stress this enough!

Tebryn
2012-10-27, 07:15 PM
Who ever wins we lose. They're both terrible bores with only halfway decent writing and unlikable characters.

Traab
2012-10-27, 08:11 PM
Considering that langoliers technically are devouring all of reality, I have to go with them. Im honestly not sure about all the odd bits you added in, but reality destroying beings are generally pretty close to tops on the list of "things that win versus contests"

The Glyphstone
2012-10-27, 08:22 PM
As far as I can tell, this is not Alan Wake vs. Langoliers at all. This is Alan Wake vs. Mr. Scratch, with a time limit on the fight.

D_Lord
2012-10-27, 09:29 PM
I don't know how this is going to turn out but it reminds me of some which I think would go under,
You are all DOOOM!!

Drosselmeyer (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Princess_Tutu) from Princess Tutu at Cauldron Lake.

Triscuitable
2012-10-27, 09:53 PM
As far as I can tell, this is not Alan Wake vs. Langoliers at all. This is Alan Wake vs. Mr. Scratch, with a time limit on the fight.

It's more of a goal. You can't exactly have him defeat them, because they can't be beaten. That's what makes it interesting.

Coidzor
2012-10-27, 10:32 PM
I do not understand the question.

If the Langoliers are invincible and that's largely why they're a threat, why make them Taken and thus vulnerable to Alan Wake as well as less intelligent than they were beforehand? :smallconfused:

Triscuitable
2012-10-27, 10:50 PM
I do not understand the question.

If the Langoliers are invincible and that's largely why they're a threat, why make them Taken and thus vulnerable to Alan Wake as well as less intelligent than they were beforehand? :smallconfused:

The whole point I should've made in the OP is that this was a collaboration of a dull character versus dull and invincible characters.

The concept in itself is stupid. Thus, act accordingly and write up the most insane reasons as to why one side would be victorious. Or be serious.

Sipex
2012-10-29, 10:32 AM
Good to see everyone is so nice and supportive, glad our board has a reputation for that.

Seriously, I think Alan would win. This is essentially a situation which he excels in, especially since you're giving him control of the story via writing (which he's already proved he knows how to use to his advantage). It would probably be close, but only because things were written like that.

GloatingSwine
2012-10-29, 06:53 PM
I do not understand the question.

If the Langoliers are invincible and that's largely why they're a threat, why make them Taken and thus vulnerable to Alan Wake as well as less intelligent than they were beforehand? :smallconfused:

The Langoliers are better as a concept than an incarnate thing. Yesterday is gone forever, no-one can ever get it back, so what would happen to you if you were stuck in yesterday and everyone went on without you? It's a pretty solid existential horror idea, but I never thought it quite made it as a full length novel. Could have been a great basis for a short story. And a very silly TV series with hyperactive death meatballs.