You did what with that?

[frost890]

I was wondering about some of the moments that people used item in unusual ways. If they are mundane items or magic items it should be interesting to see what comes up.

To start it off one of my characters used a decanter of water to give a water elemental health regeneration. I heard about a monk(I think that’s what it was) that used a grapping hook to latch on to flying enemies and do some acrobatic combat.

[EmperorNortonII]

What about a ring of regeneration to facilitate long-term torture?

Have you read A Song of Ice and Fire?

Think about how awful it was to be Theon Greyjoy when he was flayed just a little bit, and imagine how awful it would be to have the very top layer of your skin, with all its nerve endings, ripped off day, after day, after day, quite possibly forever.

[Kelb_Panthera]

Zero to creepy in a single post. Way to go EmperorNortonII. :smallannoyed:

It's not really unsual per se, but I've seen a pc activate his quaal's feather token: tree after being swallowed whole as a means of making a quick and spectacular exit from the creature's gullet. I think it was a purple worm. (?)

[Medic!]

I had a barbarian kill....something, don't remember what, but something nasty and end-dungeon-ish...with a shovel once. Granted he had filled that shovel with the Grey Slime hazard from Dungeonscape and whacked the thing in the face with it moments before the cleric fired off a merciless round of Light spells.

Shovels and 0 lvl spells, masterful tools of the 8th lvl PC

[dungeonnerd]

This is more a DM thing than anything else but...

5th level PCs are hired to clear a coal mine of goblins/hobgoblins. Sorcerer has a penchant for fireball, brown mold had infested parts of the mine.

Relevant background:
Brown Mold (CR 2)

Brown mold feeds on warmth, drawing heat from anything around it. It normally comes in patches 5 feet in diameter, and the temperature is always cold in a 30-foot radius around it. Living creatures within 5 feet of it take 3d6 points of nonlethal cold damage. Fire brought within 5 feet of brown mold causes it to instantly double in size. Cold damage, such as from a cone of cold, instantly destroys it.

Coal mine fires (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coal_seam_fire) can burn for centuries.

[Ravens_cry]

What about a ring of regeneration to facilitate long-term torture?

Heh, reminds me of Prometheus's punishment.
While I have never done so, never played a character that kind of evil, I have considered the implications of using cure spells in a similar manner.
Looking over the rules, we may be breaking them here, but it has become common in our group to use the ability to dismiss a casting of light as a way of sending a silent signal when a party splits up for scouting purposes.

[TypoNinja]

Most fun you'll ever have with an improvised weapon.

Party is holed up in the armoury of a castle we just busted into. It's infested with goblins and we've frankly bit off more than we could chew, we're only around 5th level, all melee types, there's something like a dozen baddies out there, mix of goblins, gnolls and something larger that escapes me at the moment and more reinforcements can be heard assembling.

My character, a Half-Ogre barbo, eyes the door up, figures its just about the right size, that is a little smaller than the corridor outside.

Party busts out the armory, I go left, with the door, while everybody else goes right. Use the door as a giant over-sized tower shield and start bull-rushing down the corridor which fortuitously turns into corner only about 20 feet back.

One massive raging bullrush check later I turned 4 gnolls into chunky paste against the wall and rush back the way I came to join a fight that suddenly looks like we might win.

[Alleran]

This is more a DM thing than anything else but...

5th level PCs are hired to clear a coal mine of goblins/hobgoblins. Sorcerer has a penchant for fireball, brown mold had infested parts of the mine.

Relevant background:
Brown Mold (CR 2)

Brown mold feeds on warmth, drawing heat from anything around it. It normally comes in patches 5 feet in diameter, and the temperature is always cold in a 30-foot radius around it. Living creatures within 5 feet of it take 3d6 points of nonlethal cold damage. Fire brought within 5 feet of brown mold causes it to instantly double in size. Cold damage, such as from a cone of cold, instantly destroys it.

Coal mine fires (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coal_seam_fire) can burn for centuries.
That's hilarious. Did they still get paid?

[Killer Angel]

That's hilarious. Did they still get paid?

Probably with the Iron Price... :smallwink:


I had a barbarian kill....something, don't remember what, but something nasty and end-dungeon-ish...with a shovel once.

Well, with a good shovel (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHvGZBcIEy8&feature=player_detailpage#t=29s), it's not so unusual... :smallcool:

[Gbrngfol]

My friends love testing every possible way to use items in this way. Possibly the coolest thing that's ever happened in one of my games is a friend ordered a squad to smash into the enemy's phalanx, with a battering ram. It was oddly effective.

[TuggyNE]

Looking over the rules, we may be breaking them here, but it has become common in our group to use the ability to dismiss a casting of light as a way of sending a silent signal when a party splits up for scouting purposes.

Sadly, you are (you have to be in range to dismiss). Much like the old tricks with troll finger telecommunication and what-not, the rules don't quite support it.


Well, with a good shovel (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHvGZBcIEy8&feature=player_detailpage#t=29s), it's not so unusual... :smallcool:

Or how about this spade vorpal halberd (http://rustyandco.com/comic/level-6-5/)? :smallwink:

[Ravens_cry]

Sadly, you are (you have to be in range to dismiss). Much like the old tricks with troll finger telecommunication and what-not, the rules don't quite support it.

Hmm, troll-finger telecommunication, how was this supposed to work?

[Serpentine]

My old DM had a point when we were in the Underdark when we wanted to get up somewhere high. Underneath this point were a whole lot of strange mushrooms. The spores of these mushrooms, when someone touched them, caused a Reverse Gravity effect. The idea was that a creature would blunder along, get thrown up into the air, smash against the roof, and then smash dead into the ground, providing nutrients for the new baby mushrooms. You had to be very careful when you used it, but if you were it was a handy way to get up in the air. One of the characters managed to harvest several doses of the spores for future use.
Nothing much happened with them for a long time. That campaign ended, and I started mine from that point, continuing on with the same characters. I had them ambushed by a group of bandits. Their leader, I would like to point out, had a name. He was a named NPC, guys! He could have joined them if they wanted him to, even, or come back as a recurring villain! Either way!
So this bandit leader confronted the party, the usual "stand and deliver" type stuff. While they were talking, and when it became clear that the peaceful method wasn't working, one of the party members remembered the anti-gravity spores they'd collected months, probably, before. They passed it on to another PC, who then... hoiked it at the bandit leader. All of it.
He was thrown several hundred metres into the air, before plummeting back to earth again.
I believe he survived, but only just, and he was promptly handed over to the authorities.

[nedz]

5' wide corridor, Rod of Wonder, Summon Elephant.

And then the party needed to go that way.:smalleek:

[DoughGuy]

In one game the DM made diamonds very very rare. We needed to raid a heavily guarded mine for their diamonds to get us out of trouble with a big gang. My idea was to grab a couple dozen decanters of endless water and fill the mine up, then have the wizard cast water breathing on everyone else. Unfortunately we were on a time limit so it wasn't possible for the mission, but the DM said if we had the time it could have been an effective strategy.

[TuggyNE]

Hmm, troll-finger telecommunication, how was this supposed to work?

If memory serves, the idea was for a party to leave a troll at their base in a cage, and minions with instructions to chop it up into little pieces if they needed help urgently. The party would then take a severed hand with them on their travels far away, and if at any point the hand started to regenerate a new troll, they would know that it was now the largest piece. A low-bandwidth means of communication, but useful for emergencies.

Of course, this doesn't work, because severed members die after a while.

[dungeonnerd]

That's hilarious. Did they still get paid?

They did, but after a day or two the entire kingdom was covered in brown mold so it didn't really do them any good.

[ahenobarbi]

Last session we encountered an ooze [0]. I didn't have any weapons [1]. Rest of the party had only slashing and piercing weapons. and one alchemist fire. Luckily we had some ancient furniture around to use as improvised bludgeoning thrown weapons :smallcool:

Oh and when I was playing a cleric we sold as slaves to a necromancer who used mindless undead as guards in mines. The moment we were alone with undead I used dusty floor to make a holy symbol :smallbiggrin:

[0] I think it was a Black Pudding.
[1] My new wizard character. I decided only on crucial equipment and adding equipment mid combat seems a bit like cheating.


Coal mine fires (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coal_seam_fire) can burn for centuries.[/spoiler]

Wouldn't the brown mold extinguish fire :smallamused:

[grarrrg]

Or how about this spade vorpal halberd (http://rustyandco.com/comic/level-6-5/)? :smallwink:

Shovels are a very effective combat weapon.
More Examples:
http://myenvoy.com/movies/reviews/mysterymen/shovlerBG.JPGhttp://cbandccgaming.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/soldiertaunt3.pnghttp://images.wikia.com/borderlands/images/4/44/Shovel_bazooka.jpg

[O.L.Scudmungus]

On the run and trapped within a harem, confronted with a 50' wall and no rope, surrounded by beautiful defenseless women, I casually asked the DM if he could remember how long the human intestinal tract was.

Ah, the memories of the look on his face.

:smallsmile:

[dungeonnerd]

Wouldn't the brown mold extinguish fire :smallamused:

Coal seam fires burn entirely underground - as in the coal that's completely encased in rock is burning. Also, technically by RAW the growth would be exponential, since each round the patch would double in size.

[falloutimperial]

A jar of honey with oil and alchemists' fire apparently a sticky bomb makes.

[Ksheep]

First campaign I played in, we were traveling through the desert. A large sandstorm came upon us, so we tied ourselves together so as not to get separated. Unfortunately, the person who tied me on failed… and I was a gnome.

I was promptly blown away from the party, when I had this strange idea: why not use my cloak to steer myself. The DM had me roll an INT check to see if I could think of it and a DEX check to see if I could pull it off. One Nat 20 and Nat 3 later…*"You think you might be able to fly yourself back to the rest of the party, but your arms don't quite bend that way."

If only I rolled a bit better on the DEX check…

[Xervous]

So in a recent episode of our ongoing campaign, the McGuffin, a box with tons of magical protection on it, notably a spell that functioned similar to a symbol of death (on the inside), got stolen by pirates.

One uncharted island and a dungeon later (with enough shocker lizards to down the level 4 rogue and the wizard, which isn't saying much) we wandered outside to find the pirate ship crashed and rotting on the shore. We quickly deduced that the pirates must have been foolish enough to open the box, and as we reasoned this out, we came across a few issues.

0. The pseudo symbol of death only needed to be looked at to trigger, establishing its 60 ft radius AoE of death.

1. We did not know if it was satisfied with all the HD it had consumed
2. We did not know its location within the ship
3. No one wanted to get close to the ship.

So we decided to use summoned monsters to check if it was still up. Going one step further, the wizard decided to levitate to a position above the ship with the aid of a push.

Once in position, he waved the wand and uttered the magic word. And what did he summon to drop into the potential zone of death? A puppy, a cute, innocent celestial puppy that shouted up at him the question of "Why?" which only my Cleric could understand, before it went splat against the sand some 100 ft below and was whisked away to the outer planes.

Next round he did it again

third round the puppy survived the impact with the wooden deck, actually broke through, and supposedly 'died' against the second deck.

[jokeaccount]

Don't know if it is really smart, but I once used a summoned dog from my wand of summon monster I and told it to charge in a direction I predicted an invisible wizard was. The DM didn't accept this tactic and gave me a 5% chance of success on a d100 but I found the guy anyway and barely gave us the victory.

I, later in the campaign, used the dog once again to actually hide an evil book my party's cleric wanted to destroy. That way I didn't know where it was so it is impossible to find it via detect thoughts etc. Locate object won't work, neither will discern location since the caster, who is going to be an npc, hasn't touched the object in question. I personally kept a page of the book inside a booby trapped vial and I will give it to the NPC when i want to have discern location cast on the book in order to retrieve it ;)

Another much smarter and really overpowered thing that i've heard of is using an armor of photosynthesis or whatever it is called (casts regen 3 on yourself as long as it gets hit by any kind of light source) along with a torch with Continual Flame cast on it. Not really useful in a fight but your HP gets back to full after every fight without having to rest!

[Hiro Protagonest]

Once in position, he waved the wand and uttered the magic word. And what did he summon to drop into the potential zone of death? A puppy, a cute, innocent celestial puppy that shouted up at him the question of "Why?" which only my Cleric could understand, before it went splat against the sand some 100 ft below and was whisked away to the outer planes.

Next round he did it again

third round the puppy survived the impact with the wooden deck, actually broke through, and supposedly 'died' against the second deck.

Summoned creatures don't die, the spell is just broken or somesuch.


As for shovels: A shovel with a sharpened edge is not only a decent halberd, it can make half-decent fortifications (as long as you're not in a rocky mountain area). Axes are good for this too in forested areas.

[TypoNinja]

Another much smarter and really overpowered thing that i've heard of is using an armor of photosynthesis or whatever it is called (casts regen 3 on yourself as long as it gets hit by any kind of light source) along with a torch with Continual Flame cast on it. Not really useful in a fight but your HP gets back to full after every fight without having to rest!

A wondrous item granting fast healing 1 forever (as per lesser vigor) is shockingly cheap too, I like your trick better though, its got more flavor to it. :D

[Gbrngfol]

Ok strangely someone just killed a guy using grass. Well daggergrass*. An ambush was discovered in a large patch of it so my friends decided to use wind magic to make the daggergrass sway. The result was a raiding party being slowly slashed to death.

Daggergrass

CR 0-? (Depends on size.)

A common grass-like plant with a sharp, serrated edge. Can grow as tall as the average human and deals 1d4 physical damage to anyone stupid enough to run through it. (1d6 when tall.) It's assumed that it can be brushed aside before dealing damage while walking. (Note: This has been slightly edited so it could be fit into a D&D format.)

[Darth Stabber]

Immovable rods are not to be used as suppositories.

Invisible Immovable rods are excellent for keeping castle drawbridges open before an attack. Simple disguise ones self as a peasant or someone bearing gifts for the castle's master, and carry a bag full of gifts or whatever peasants carry. Drop the bag and set the invisible rod while picking your stuff up. Because of the lever effect, the strength of the rod to hold the gate open will be magnified.

Write a book with shrieker paste (and a gentle repose spell to keep it from breaking down). Anyone with darkvision can read it, anyone without it will get screamed at and the words on the page will disappear.

Cut off your small toe, submerge in quintessence, give to cleric. Get res'd easy. You can also use this to enable the previous troll trick, just take it out every so often, like single bit voice mail. Or when fighting trolls without fire and/or acid, hack off a big chunk, submerge in quintessence, hack the remainder into smaller pieces. The biggest piece is now locked out of time, stalling the regeneration until it's convenient. You now have a portable instant troll.

In fact, quitessence, if you can't figure out a way for it to make your current situation better, you might not be that creative. (As a note better in terms of interestingness and possible sadism, not necessarily direct resolution)

[ahenobarbi]

Nice ideas Darth Stabber but this one doesn't work:

Cut off your small toe, submerge in quintessence, give to cleric. Get res'd easy.

because:


the portion (of creature body) receiving the spell must have been part of the creature’s body at the time of death

[gr8artist]

Giant steaming pot of soup in an attempt to locate invisible adversary...

"Can I throw this pot of soup in an arc so we can see the guy that just went invisible?" :smallconfused:
"Uh, yeah, why not. Miss chance and whatnot... make a touch attack, -4 for improvised..." :smallamused:
(rolls...)
"Nat twenty!" :smallcool:
"There he is. Get 'im." :smallbiggrin:

[HunterColt22]

I had a wand once, and our DM plays with older rules where if you break a magic weapon, a big boom occurs.

"!" "I have an idea... I go invisible." "Okay, now want?" "I move up to the dead body and place the wand under the body."

"Okay what good is that going to do against the li-!"

"I am a sneaky little death midget, I am a leaf on the wind, watch how I soar."

Out of character my friend says,

"You blow up the dead body of Harlin's dad, and I will kill you."

"... smallcool: I am strangely okay with that, you never saw me place the wand anyway."

One high sleight of hand check later, and a called shot on the wand, and we have one lich in very many pieces.

[RFLS]

Just had the party I'm running through RHoD do the first encounter. The archivist nailed Uth Lar with Hold Person after Uth Lar had ripped open the Totemist. The Alchemist was a little irritated by that, so he pulled out a bomb and shoved it down Uth Lar's mouth.

They're allegedly Good aligned.

[willpell]

brown mold had infested parts of the mine....[/spoiler]

Oh my god this is brilliant. I am so stealing this - and until now there was no brown mold in my game because I considered it dumb, but this just brought it all the way back around to "so awesome I no longer care if it's dumb or not" (which frankly is about the best I can hope for with much of D&D stuff).

[HunterColt22]

Just had the party I'm running through RHoD do the first encounter. The archivist nailed Uth Lar with Hold Person after Uth Lar had ripped open the Totemist. The Alchemist was a little irritated by that, so he pulled out a bomb and shoved it down Uth Lar's mouth.

They're allegedly Good aligned.

We have done that once. Our party member survived the experience, the other guy not so much, and before this the druid wild shaped into an adult dragon and bit off his arm, that enemy was not having a good day.

[ahenobarbi]

Coal seam fires burn entirely underground - as in the coal that's completely encased in rock is burning. Also, technically by RAW the growth would be exponential, since each round the patch would double in size.

Yes but the mold absorbs heat. And without heat the coal can not burn.

[Karoht]

Foe: Monsterously Sized Boar, looking like it is about to charge the party Barbarian, who is trying to intimidate them and doing nothing but drawing attention to himself.
Me: Halfling ranger who happened to have in his hands (because we had just finished climbing a cliff face) a grappling hook and rope. As a move action he throws the other end of the rope around a decent sized tree, and ties it off (nat 20 use rope) and ready's his standard action to throw the grappling hook if either boar decides to charge. Sure enough, the boar charges.
DM gave me a ranged touch attack at a -10 penalty to do a ranged trip attempt. A second nat 20. DM does some math.

"The hook manages to lodge itself perfectly in and about the genetal area. When the rope went taut, you watched as the boar pretty much snapped himself in half. It's dead from sheer spinal stress, though it if matters, it's pelvic region is shattered and torn open."

Me: :smallbiggrin:
I make victory bacon later.
(I rolled critical bacon)

[dungeonnerd]

Yes but the mold absorbs heat. And without heat the coal can not burn.

The mold feeds on heat, true. However, nowhere does it say that it extinguishes a flame.

[Karoht]

Thinking with real world physics, it is entirely possible that the Mold would absorb all the excess CO2, rather than it building up and stiffling the fire.
At the same point, the mold would potentiall expand to the point where the fire might not have air flow.
BUT, most molds feed on CO2 and produce oxygen.

So my answer is a resounding "um, I dunno"

[Kerilstrasz]

my 1st campaign even...
my 1st session ever...
i was a lvl1 rogue...

DM: ok.. you climbed the cliff and now you see an orc scout sleeping ander a tree...
Me: i sneak behind him and ready my dagger to Coup de grace him..
DM: you mean the dagger you used as foothold a while ago at the bottom of the cliff???
Me: ehh.. hmmm... wait a min...

I open my phb... and started to browse it fast...
until i found a picture of the thieve's tools kit...

Looking at DM whith a big smile...
Me: See that little saw here?(showing him the pic)..

well... he got so excited i pulled that off at my 1st session that i got awarded a lvl :)

[Thespianus]

Coal seam fires burn entirely underground - as in the coal that's completely encased in rock is burning. Also, technically by RAW the growth would be exponential, since each round the patch would double in size.

But a single Frost spell would destroy it all. Sometimes a Cantrip (Ray of Frost) WOULD come in handy. Before casting it, you should ask for more reward and then yell "Surprise" after you've cast the spell, destroying a cubic mile or so of Brown Mold in one big puff. :smallamused:

My DM once allowed a chunk of "real world" Physics to enter our DnD game. Some sort of bad guys came running down a hallway, towards the room we were in. Within the room there was a pit with some nasty tentacle monster inside, and the bad guys was going to run around the pit. I readied an action to cast Grease on the floor infront of the pit, in the area where the bad guys would have to make the turn.

The bad guys slipped on the Grease (due to momentum, which really doesn't exist in DnD), and shot right down into the pit, where they were promptly eaten. And there was much rejoicing.

[Deophaun]

Once in position, he waved the wand and uttered the magic word. And what did he summon to drop into the potential zone of death? A puppy, a cute, innocent celestial puppy that shouted up at him the question of "Why?" which only my Cleric could understand, before it went splat against the sand some 100 ft below and was whisked away to the outer planes.
Your cleric was the only one in the party that spoke/understood Common? Must have been an interesting adventure.

[Darth Stabber]

Your cleric was the only one in the party that spoke/understood Common? Must have been an interesting adventure.

Reminds me of a party that was 3 druids and a rogue. Every one made fun of the rogue in druidic but the rogue could never understand it. The rogue's player did though, and it was hilarious.

[TuggyNE]

Reminds me of a party that was 3 druids and a rogue. Every one made fun of the rogue in druidic but the rogue could never understand it. The rogue's player did though, and it was hilarious.

+1 Internet for good RP all around. :smallcool:

[kardar233]

A bag of holding full of oil and a 7th-level wizard makes for improvised thermobaric weaponry. Fun times.

One of the players in my current group claims to have dealt two thousand damage with a pair of pants.

[Wyntonian]

One of the players in my current group claims to have dealt two thousand damage with a pair of pants.

What. The. Snuggle.

[Gbrngfol]

@^ Enchant them so they fire about fifty fireballs per use.

[Mithril Leaf]

Artificers get to have the most fun out of all my characters. In a scorching desert world, I used a combination of decanter of endless water and summoned brown mold (via mold touch) to produce an icy kingdom. Then I gave myself the cold subtype and hung out there for quite a while. Creating an ice palace in the middle of boiling hot desert for under 20k gp is something I'm pretty proud of.
I also liked using minor creation to produce jeffrey pine resin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeffrey_Pine). A plant extract, it is violently explosive. And I do mean violently, it's destroyed several factories in small quantities.

[kardar233]

What. The. Snuggle.

Apparently it was some kind of Epic ubercharging Drunken Master build.

[Gbrngfol]

@^ Thank you. I missed the white text.

[Sugashane]

Very high level game, we used a large portable hole filled with a very potent holy water (did 8d6 damage per flask). Filled it and covered the open hole (laying on the ground) with the rug that was originally there. I was a large monk/paladin who specialized in grappling.

Vecna ended up walking up near it as we laid it early, and he had to get in range for a spell. I used the boots of teleportation (on a held action) to get on the flanking side of Vecna from the hidden hole. I succeed the grapple and was able to push him back 5 foot, as we fell into the hole. The thief/shadowdancer (on a held action) did a shadow jump to the hole and folded it up. I had a ring of water breathing as well.

Between the damage we had already inflicted, my grapple (with unarmed strike damage), and being submerged in this very potent holy water, Vecna could not make the DC to cast teleport (with his strength being 24, and max load being 700 pounds, he likely couldn't have done so anyway with be weighing 1000 pounds). He died in just 3 rounds of being submerged.

[Annos]

This isn't me killing something, but once opon a campaign i was playing a dragonfire adept, we faced a very long boat ride probubly riddles with random encounters, so I use my breath weapon that renews every turn and turned our man poweres row boat into a jet bowered boat:smallbiggrin:

[Silentone98]

stuff

Being that Vecna is the diety of secrets and he knows EVERYTHING in his domain and portfolio,... I find it hard to believe he wouldnt have automatically known about the trap.
Literally, the only way to keep a secret from Vecna, is NOT to keep a secret. I would call that very poor handling of dieties, regardless of the level.
From a casual, fun perspective tho,... nice.

As far as using items in unusual ways... I had one of my players use a medium sized half-fiend creature that he hated and finally beat down, as a improvised weapon to attack my end game boss(who had given them the choice to surrender, enter the prison so you can break out type deal)
Instead because he proceded to attempt to use this creature to beat on my end game boss, he was fried on the spot. Later arose, barely alive as the only person not in prison.

[Sugashane]

Being that Vecna is the diety of secrets and he knows EVERYTHING in his domain and portfolio,... I find it hard to believe he wouldnt have automatically known about the trap.
Literally, the only way to keep a secret from Vecna, is NOT to keep a secret. I would call that very poor handling of dieties, regardless of the level.
From a casual, fun perspective tho,... nice.



I agree completely. We talked openly about schemes to try in public before deciding on this trick. But since we were not telling Vecna as we tried to lure him near it, you are completely right. He should have seen right through the plot. Overall we thought it would take me and the enlarged dwarf to wrestle him into the hole, have it sealed up, and he (the dwarf) would likely drown and have to be resurrected in the process.

Love that idea. Beat a MF'er... with another MF'er. :smallbiggrin:

[Sith_Happens]

On the run and trapped within a harem, confronted with a 50' wall and no rope, surrounded by beautiful defenseless women, I casually asked the DM if he could remember how long the human intestinal tract was.

Ah, the memories of the look on his face.

:smallsmile:

http://darwinisms.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Nothing-to-do-here-300x225.jpg


(I rolled critical bacon)

You, sir, win at the English language.

[TypoNinja]

On the run and trapped within a harem, confronted with a 50' wall and no rope, surrounded by beautiful defenseless women, I casually asked the DM if he could remember how long the human intestinal tract was.

Ah, the memories of the look on his face.

:smallsmile:

Trapped in a harem full of beautiful women, where presumably silk is easily acquirable, (you know silk, the stuff you braid a rope from), with the added bonus that it gives you a good excuse to make that naked beautiful women, and your first thought is a disemboweling?

I have GOT to get into a World of Darkness game with you.

[Silentone98]

I agree completely. We talked openly about schemes to try in public before deciding on this trick. But since we were not telling Vecna as we tried to lure him near it, you are completely right. He should have seen right through the plot.

I imagine simply telling him doesn't quite work either, lol
He is a tricky fellow to figure out how to mess with.
I have to amend that tho... I suppose setting up Vecna's death with full intention of showing him by using the method immediately, is in effect not keeping a secret at all. Such a tough call.

[Ravens_cry]

My DM once allowed a chunk of "real world" Physics to enter our DnD game. Some sort of bad guys came running down a hallway, towards the room we were in. Within the room there was a pit with some nasty tentacle monster inside, and the bad guys was going to run around the pit. I readied an action to cast Grease on the floor infront of the pit, in the area where the bad guys would have to make the turn.

The bad guys slipped on the Grease (due to momentum, which really doesn't exist in DnD), and shot right down into the pit, where they were promptly eaten. And there was much rejoicing.
Eh, I'd allow that. Give them a reflex save or Acrobatics check, but I'd allow it.

[Reaper_Monkey]

Trapped in a harem full of beautiful women, where presumably silk is easily acquirable, (you know silk, the stuff you braid a rope from), with the added bonus that it gives you a good excuse to make that naked beautiful women, and your first thought is a disembowelling?

This evaluation somehow makes the scene even more funny :smallbiggrin:.

Player 1: {Lengthy description of their logical reasoning for why their plan should work}
GM {hesitantly}: "Um, okay... after minutes of blood, screams and unquestionable evil you've fashioned a makeshift rope and climbed over the wall."
Player 2 enters room again.
Player 2: "What was that about makeshift ropes?"
GM {slightly shaken still}: "Player 1 just escaped the palace via the harem."
Players 2: "Aww man, I missed a harem? Now I wish I didn't escape via the poop-chute in the kings quarters! Did you at least keep the rope? You could probably sell that."
GM: "I don't think anyone would want to buy it really."
Player 2: "Well it was a kings harem, they must have all been wearing some pretty high quality silk. That would sell for quite a bit."
Player 1 face slowly shifts from realisation to terror.
Player 1 {weakly}: "Oh no, what have I done?" [Optional Evil Ending]"All that potential loot I left behind!"[/Optional Evil Ending]

[Rubik]

Quaal's feather token vs troll. (http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8096183/11/Harry-Potter-and-the-Natural-20)

[kardar233]

Trapped in a harem full of beautiful women, where presumably silk is easily acquirable, (you know silk, the stuff you braid a rope from), with the added bonus that it gives you a good excuse to make that naked beautiful women, and your first thought is a disemboweling?

I have GOT to get into a World of Darkness game with you.

You think that's bad? For reference, Remote Body was a homebrew spell that allowed you to detach limbs or organs without killing the subject; good for surgery, but you probably should use an anaesthetic spell too. I was once playing a game where my character was called upon to put on a bit of musical entertainment. My response: "Hmm... we've got a xylophone framework... I knew I had Remote Body for a reason!" I look at my right-hand man (another PC). He nods: "Understood, sir. I'll get the red-hot irons ready." Tuning took some work, though.

Just another one of the many times we've scarred our DM. One particularly memorable one was the time we were on a terror mission, and one of the PCs found a village and had an idea: Bodyworlds exhibit! With Remote Body... and living subjects...

[Allanimal]

So we decided to use summoned monsters to check if it was still up. Going one step further, the wizard decided to levitate to a position above the ship with the aid of a push.

Once in position, he waved the wand and uttered the magic word. And what did he summon to drop into the potential zone of death? A puppy, a cute, innocent celestial puppy that shouted up at him the question of "Why?" which only my Cleric could understand, before it went splat against the sand some 100 ft below and was whisked away to the outer planes.

Next round he did it again

third round the puppy survived the impact with the wooden deck, actually broke through, and supposedly 'died' against the second deck.

I don't understand why there were puppy splatty impacts. You can't summon something in mid-air.

[Xervous]

There was some serious houseruling going on in favor of that specific wizard, but he had been whining for ages about certain sourcebooks begin banned and all...

Of course, we have run into a lot of omission errors on the DMs part in that group, so it comes as no surprise. Thankfully they seem to work out in our favor.

The last one was a midnight encounter spanning two ships: us (level 3s) on a trade ship and a group of goblin pirates whose statistics you can find in stormwrack, in the middle of the ocean, in fog, as in anything within 5 ft of you has concealment, beyond that, total... so technically the rogues shouldn't have gotten a single sneak attack off.


two rogues, an archer, a cleric, and a suicidal blast happy wizard... Don't know how we survived...

oh yeah... One of the rogues hung over the edge of the boat, wizard swapped him and the goblin captain with baleful transposition, and the wizard rolled a natural 20 on his intimidate the next round... thank goodness he was using his pirate voice then and not the bane in a cup one...

[laeZ1]

I don't understand why there were puppy splatty impacts. You can't summon something in mid-air.

The "Rule of cool"'s brother in law: "Rule of funny" that states "If the action in question resolves in puppy splatty impacts, don't tell the player they can't".

[Deophaun]

I don't understand why there were puppy splatty impacts. You can't summon something in mid-air.
Not quite true. You can summon a flying creature in mid-air. He would have been more effective summoning celestial eagles or fiendish hawks, but then the story wouldn't have been as memorable.

[The Grue]

Immovable rods are not to be used as suppositories.

I...I don't even...no, nevermind, I don't want to know.