Conan the Barbarian (1982) [Archive] - Giant in the Playground Forums

Cikomyr

2013-03-22, 04:54 PM

I just finished watching this.. this...

THIS MASTERPIECE

First time I ever got around watching it, and oh my god. It's EPIC. I was expecting a cheese feast, but my god, it was EPIC. The action scenes were clear, eventful and NOT REPETITIVE (suck it, Conan 2011). You had clear deaths, and the action changed to a new sequence. No prolonged stupid duel that bores you to sleep.

The acting was a very good mix of fun and to the point - the director really led Arnold knowing 100% what was his strenghts and weaknesses. You have a very stoic actor; then have a very stoic character. Have people around HIM do the talking and the emotions. "He's Conan; he cannot cry, so I do it for him" was a marvelous lampshade of this whole thing. AND IT WORKED

The music... How many classics were born in there?! I seriously have heard some of the scores there in a thousand places!! Look up "Gift of Fury", and tell me you haven't heard the trumpet blare at 0:23 somewhere! (still wondering where..).

Also, the dual-climax was pure genius. First, you have the big showdown with the Dragons and the Army. That's 100% for the action; the gore and even the jokes at times. At real candy to enjoy. But then, right after, you have the big, emotional climax where Conan faces the Sorcerer one last time, in front of THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE. Both were significant; both were charged with emotions that shouldn't have been mingled.

Man, I really should research my classics more. I loved how magic was, in Spoony's words, "real but of consequences". Magic is.. both subtle (at times; in the case of the Sorcerer's strange charisma) and HEAVY - yet hard to achieve (in term of the healing drawings on Conan's skin).

Someone have other movies in the same branch as Conan? I already have produced myself a copy of Hawk the Slayer; I heard it's also some sort of classic.

Giggling Ghast

2013-03-22, 04:59 PM

I watched this movie when I was younger. It was a time, boy, that I searched for steel … and steel meant more to me than life itself.

Conan is pretty great movie. Personally, I don't love the fight scenes in Conan the Barbarian, as they're a bit rough. (I note a few times where blood packs seem to burst on people's bodies before Conan whacks them with a sword.) Still, the plot, the music and the atmosphere are all top-notch.

McStabbington

2013-03-22, 05:11 PM

Well, it is a cheesefest, but the thing is that it's one of those movies that transcends its cheesiness and becomes something more. The combination of surprisingly good fight choreography, awesome music, scene chewing that looks down on "Shatnerian" as if from Olympus, and a really simple, effective revenge plot, it turns into something that becomes all the more endearing for the hokey elements. About the only movies I can think compare are Raiders of the Lost Ark and Evil Dead II.

Honestly, I think modern filmmakers could learn a lot about how to make their action scenes coherent and thematically appropriate from the film, because it's one of the best I've ever seen at turning guys obviously fake-poking each other with sticks into sheer unbridled awesomeness.

Cikomyr

2013-03-22, 05:14 PM

Also, I have to give props to the movie's special effects. The Giant Snake really felt... real. I know it was animatronic 100%, but it was nice to see Arnold actually interact and struggle with it. He really sold it.

Also, another effect I loved was the spirit. For some reason, the.. eerical cartoonish look really, really worked, in my opinion. They really looked like something otherworldly.

dps

2013-03-22, 06:45 PM

By far the best movie Oliver Stone was ever involved with.

grolim

2013-03-22, 07:12 PM

I have hawk the Slayer and beware, it IS a cheese-fest. But in a good way.

Do not expect an epic movie like Conan. But it has WAY over the top hammy acting. I love them both. Hawk is the fried twinkie type pleasure at watching, you feel guilty but can't help it.

Balain

2013-03-23, 01:55 AM

I very much love Conan sine I was young. I often use the sound track when role-playing.

I just wish somethings were more like the stories by Robert E Howard

MLai

2013-03-23, 03:45 AM

Well... there's...

Clash Of The Titans 1981
Dragonslayer 1981
Excalibur 1981
Beastmaster 1982
Krull 1983
Ladyhawk 1985
Dragonheart 1996

You see the one I bolded? Is that showing up clearly?

Keldrin

2013-03-23, 08:41 PM

There's also "The Sword and the Sorceror" (1982), which Gygax felt was more conanesque than Arnold's Conan.

It has it's moments. Try to ignore the three bladed sword though...

MLai

2013-03-23, 09:04 PM

There's also "The Sword and the Sorceror" (1982), which Gygax felt was more conanesque than Arnold's Conan.
It has it's moments. Try to ignore the three bladed sword though...
Ignore? Ignore??!

Oh, speaking of blonde barbarians, how could I forget...
Masters Of The Universe 1987

Traab

2013-03-23, 09:09 PM

Oh god, good old Dolph. That movie was awesomely horribly. It was the type of thing I watch chop suey kung fu flicks to see. Something so terrible its awesome.

Dr.Epic

2013-03-23, 10:00 PM

Well, the original Highlander is pretty good.

JoshL

2013-03-23, 10:04 PM

Well... there's...

Clash Of The Titans 1981
Dragonslayer 1981
Excalibur1981
Beastmaster 1982
Krull 1983
Ladyhawk 1985
Legend 1985

You see the one I bolded? Is that showing up clearly?

Fixed it for you :smallwink:

MLai

2013-03-24, 01:59 AM

Oh god, good old Dolph. That movie was awesomely horribly. It was the type of thing I watch chop suey kung fu flicks to see. Something so terrible its awesome.
You don't watch that movie for Dolph. You watch it for Frank Langella's Skeletor!

If you don't limit yourself to just movies, I have 2 other recommendations:

The Odyssey 1997 TV mini-series
Jason & The Argonauts 2000 TV mini-series

I'm not sure why, but girls like them. Unlike most other movies on this thread.

Jayngfet

2013-03-24, 06:02 AM

Still, the plot, the music and the atmosphere are all top-notch.

The atmosphere on this movie sold it when I was younger. I could really FEEL what Conan was going through. Not in a literal sense but you got a feeling for the world he lived in very quickly and it was consistent through the whole thing. It wasn't a perfect recreation of the original shorts, but it wasn't really meant to be either. It was it's own special brand of raw, slightly brutal, often in-the-moment style of living it portrayed that was excellent.

Yora

2013-03-24, 06:09 AM

The music and the atmosphere ARE the movie. There really isn't much to the plot or the acting, but the movie still works.

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 09:17 AM

The atmosphere on this movie sold it when I was younger. I could really FEEL what Conan was going through. Not in a literal sense but you got a feeling for the world he lived in very quickly and it was consistent through the whole thing. It wasn't a perfect recreation of the original shorts, but it wasn't really meant to be either. It was it's own special brand of raw, slightly brutal, often in-the-moment style of living it portrayed that was excellent.

The music and the atmosphere ARE the movie. There really isn't much to the plot or the acting, but the movie still works.

Preach it. I am currently listening to the original soundtrack, and I can remember exactly where in the movie I am just by closing my eyes.

After only watching the movie once. That's powerful music.

edit: I've read on Wikipedia that Basil Poledouris wrote the music as if Conan was to be a mute Opera. Do anyone knows if such a play has been considered?

edit edit: and if someone proposed this awesome musical (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBGOQ7SsJrw), I'll smack them

Infernally Clay

2013-03-24, 09:22 AM

The highlight of the movie has to be when Conan punches that camel and knocks it out. :smallcool:

Radar

2013-03-24, 09:32 AM

The highlight of the movie has to be when Conan punches that camel and knocks it out. :smallcool:
Wasn't that in Conan the Destroyer?

pffh

2013-03-24, 09:40 AM

Wasn't that in Conan the Destroyer?

Both movies, same in universe camel.

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 09:45 AM

The highlight of the movie has to be when Conan punches that camel and knocks it out. :smallcool:

Meh. It was a funny moment, granted. But if I had to go for funny yet awesome animal cruelty; I'd go for Conan choking a vulture who started to eat waaaay too soon for its own good.

Kyberwulf

2013-03-24, 10:52 AM

In the first movie, Conan punched the Camel while he was high.
The second movie he was trying to apologise to the camel, and it spit on him. So he knocked it out again.

On that note. Don't watch the sequal. Conan, the Destroyer. I think thats the main reason everyone has such a negative outlook on the first one. The sequal was so bad, it just left a bad taste in everyone's eyes.

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 12:07 PM

comicshorse

2013-03-24, 01:05 PM

Kyberwulf

2013-03-24, 02:01 PM

I think 13th Warrior was pretty good. Should check that one out.

Eldan

2013-03-24, 02:20 PM

I think 13th Warrior was pretty good. Should check that one out.

Is that the one where an Arab joins a band if Wikings?

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 02:37 PM

Is that the one where an Arab joins a band if Wikings?

And it's awesome

Radar

2013-03-24, 04:10 PM

One thing, that came to my mind:
Robin of Sherwood - it's a british TV series with immense attention to detail, when it comes to the historical setting, great atmosphere, solid story, a magnificant rendition of the Sheriff and wonderful music (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnkWvh1pvU8) by the courtesy of Clannad.

I cannot recommend this show strongly enough.

Kindablue

2013-03-24, 05:00 PM

If you're just looking for a big, epic adventure movie with a great score and beautiful cinematography, you might like Lawrence of Arabia.

Traab

2013-03-24, 05:03 PM

And it's awesome

Agreed, It made little to no sense, and was awesome for it.

comicshorse

2013-03-24, 05:08 PM

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 05:43 PM

Agreed, It made little to no sense, and was awesome for it.

You do know there is actually part of it that is true?

Ahmad Ibn Fadlan was real and really visited these parts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ahmad_ibn_Fadlan)

Off course, the whole "joined 12 other warriors in a quest against Mordoks" is taken from Bewulf, I think

Dr.Epic

2013-03-24, 06:03 PM

Both movies, same in universe camel.

In the 2011 film, please tell me there's a reference/allusion to this. I've heard the film is bad, but if they reference the camel, that'll at least make the movie worth watching to me, Dr. Epic.

Delusion

2013-03-24, 06:19 PM

Cikomyr

2013-03-24, 07:00 PM

The highlight of the movie has to be when Conan punches that camel and knocks it out. :smallcool:

Holy crap. I just read that apparently, the camel didn't survive that scene.

The acting-Camel. Apparently, being punched by young Arnie is bad for your health.

Jayngfet

2013-03-24, 07:04 PM

In the 2011 film, please tell me there's a reference/allusion to this. I've heard the film is bad, but if they reference the camel, that'll at least make the movie worth watching to me, Dr. Epic.

If there was, I didn't get it. Not because I didn't watch the movie, but because not only was it so bland I didn't remember a thing after, but I forgot about it WHILE I WAS WATCHING IT.

I rented it, popped it on the tv, realised I'd checked out less than halfway through, tried twice more, and still haven't the faintest idea what the movie is actually about. I mean they certainly tried to capture the feel of the original stories, and I was excited for it after reading the interviews and how much the staff seemed to love the movies, but the final product is so unremarkable your eyes may full well glaze over before you hit that scene.

Tiki Snakes

2013-03-24, 08:24 PM

So, am I only who hated the music in this film? It felt so out of place that it completely ruined tension for me when it should have supported it. Especially in one of the sneaking scenes (I think it was when Doom turned into a snake, been a while since I watched it.)

I'd be willing to bet you are in a very small minority on this one.

Eldan

2013-03-24, 09:00 PM

You do know there is actually part of it that is true?

Ahmad Ibn Fadlan was real and really visited these parts (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ahmad_ibn_Fadlan)

Off course, the whole "joined 12 other warriors in a quest against Mordoks" is taken from Bewulf, I think

Very remotely Beowulf, yes. But the King that summons them is called Hrothgar and their leader is named some variety of Beowulf.

The Troubadour

2013-03-24, 09:23 PM

On that note. Don't watch the sequal. Conan, the Destroyer. I think thats the main reason everyone has such a negative outlook on the first one. The sequal was so bad, it just left a bad taste in everyone's eyes.

I think it's a fun, cheesy movie on which to waste an afternoon. Certainly a lot better than "Krull". :-)

The Glyphstone

2013-03-25, 12:47 AM

Holy crap. I just read that apparently, the camel didn't survive that scene.

The acting-Camel. Apparently, being punched by young Arnie is bad for your health.

Citation? I remember hearing about that rumor many times, but never saw any proof it actually happened.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-25, 02:58 AM

And it's awesome

No, it is AWESOME until you realize what the enemies are. I feel it is an immenstly schizophrenic movie:

One one hand you have the most realistic and historically correct portrayal of vikings in any non-documentary, ever. You hire an (in Sweden) iconic actor to play the viking king.

And then you decide to take a sharp left turn from reality two thirds into the movie and makes the badguys be cannibalistic neanderthals (that somehow survived in Scandinavia until 950 AD (not to mention that Neanderthals never lived in Scandinavia to begin with since we were under 2 kilometers of frakking ICE at the time they existed) :smallsigh: :smallconfused: :smallfrown: :smallsigh:) but actually has a chance in a fight against a fully armored and armed viking.

As for IRL Ahmad: Didn't he... improve... his stories by claiming he was the lover of the redheaded viking queen? (Heroes Wants Redheads after all) I remember getting a giggle out of that one. He also was appaled by the hygiene of the Norse (not that they were dirty, as such, but the fact that they didn't clean themselves in the same way muslims do, which isn't strange at all when you think about it) and he also exaggurated (as foreigners have always done, it seems :smallbiggrin::smalltongue:) the "easiness" of Scandinavian women.

Cikomyr

2013-03-25, 06:30 AM

Citation? I remember hearing about that rumor many times, but never saw any proof it actually happened.

Tvtropes. All right, not the best of reference.

Spiryt

2013-03-25, 06:40 AM

Everything about this movie is really, really cheesy and really, really great.

So I have no choice but to agree, crush my enemies and hear the lamentation of their women.

MLai

2013-03-25, 06:41 AM

And then you decide to take a sharp left turn from reality two thirds into the movie and makes the badguys be cannibalistic neanderthals (that somehow survived in Scandinavia until 950 AD (not to mention that Neanderthals never lived in Scandinavia to begin with since we were under 2 kilometers of frakking ICE at the time they existed) :smallsigh: :smallconfused: :smallfrown: :smallsigh:) but actually has a chance in a fight against a fully armored and armed viking.
1. You were expecting realism with this movie?
2. So you'd rather they didn't portray Vikings realistically? So if I want cowboys fighting aliens, or hell if I want a sheriff to shoot zombies, I must portray the cowboys or the sheriff unrealistically?
3. Why can't Neanderthals migrate to Scandinavia after the glaciers receded?
4. We have no idea what Neanderthal flesh physiology is like. What if they're ALL like this kid...
http://148bcec7bb334341cd98-2fb779bd12ec72d4612275342f2c9187.r31.cf1.rackcdn.c om/05a4f6e90614cbad5e6b9c37237b4202.jpg

Except as adults? Can they fight armored humans then (and lose anyways)?

As for IRL Ahmad...
I only wish in the movie he identified himself to the Vikings as a lawyer (as he is IRL) rather than a poet. That would've been worth a few jokes.

Killer Angel

2013-03-25, 06:48 AM

I've watched it in theatres when it came out and I was thirteen... amazing is an appropriate word, I still love it! :smallsmile:

edit: given that we're in argument, here's (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6BAd7xJuU0) an epic scene from a 100% trash fantasy! :smallbiggrin:

MLai

2013-03-25, 09:21 AM

given that we're in argument, here's (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6BAd7xJuU0) an epic scene from a 100% trash fantasy! :smallbiggrin:
I am tres offended that you would label such a Masterpiece as "trash fantasy." Have you no eyes, no ears, no heart to see the AWESOME? :smallmad:

Traab

2013-03-25, 11:51 AM

I only wish in the movie he identified himself to the Vikings as a lawyer (as he is IRL) rather than a poet. That would've been worth a few jokes.

Do vikings even HAVE lawyers at that time frame? Or would the jokes be stuff like, "Wait, so you have people who get paid to argue for you to settle a dispute? Are they incapable of lifting a sword and solving the problem themselves?"

Yora

2013-03-25, 03:04 PM

I don't think the germanic legal systems had any official posts and roles. From what I understand, it was a lot more like a gathering of equals in which the accusing party and the accused party would make their statements, and then the other present men of sufficient social status would discuss what amount of blame would fall to either side, and what the appropriate compensations would be to put the conflict to rest.
And in many regions there would be a hearing before the king once per year, in which he would pass judgement over the more complicated cases that could not be solved.

In practice, I think it extremely likely that there would have been some men who were really good at judging who was guilty and coming up with proposals for compensations that would satisfy all parties, in addition to having all the oral laws memorized. The word of these men would have had a lot of weight in the gathering, but I am pretty sure they had no post or formal legal education.

Lorekeeper or storyteller would probably be more accurate than lawyer.

Eldan

2013-03-25, 03:29 PM

Well, the Wiking he was mostly talking to knew Latin, so translations could be made as appropriate.

The Troubadour

2013-03-25, 03:48 PM

In practice, I think it extremely likely that there would have been some men who were really good at judging who was guilty and coming up with proposals for compensations that would satisfy all parties, in addition to having all the oral laws memorized. The word of these men would have had a lot of weight in the gathering, but I am pretty sure they had no post or formal legal education.

For an example of such a character, see Njal, of "Njal's Saga".
And actually, there were a few official posts, but very few, and they didn't have much actual power.

Killer Angel

2013-03-25, 04:01 PM

I am tres offended that you would label such a Masterpiece as "trash fantasy." Have you no eyes, no ears, no heart to see the AWESOME? :smallmad:

Are you serious?
Conan the barbarian, is a masterpiece.
The Barbarians? yeah, it's funny, but they're not in the same league.:smallconfused:

Dave Halfbreed

2013-03-25, 06:00 PM

James Earl Jones is wonderful as Thulsa Doom. In most movies with a Cult leader you wonder why on earth anybody chose to follow the idiot but Jones has the eyes and the voice that resonates. You can easily see people following him after listening to one of his speeches

Also how come nobody's mentioned 'Jason and the Argonauts' (1963) yet ?

AMEN on both counts!

Ah, Conan. I haven't read the books, but this movie makes me wish I did. I haven't seen either the sequel or the new one, but this is a gloriously fun movie. Arnold is great to watch, James Earl Jones turns in a fantastic villain, the action is brutal, the vistas are stark and epic, and the music is fantastic. They don't make movies like this anymore.

And I own Jason and the Argonauts on DVD. Great music, fun action, and the effects are beautiful.

The Troubadour

2013-03-25, 06:48 PM

Ah, Conan. I haven't read the books, but this movie makes me wish I did.

The stories are very different in tone from the movie, though. For better or worse, the movie is its own beast.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-26, 02:22 AM

1. You were expecting realism with this movie?
2. So you'd rather they didn't portray Vikings realistically? So if I want cowboys fighting aliens, or hell if I want a sheriff to shoot zombies, I must portray the cowboys or the sheriff unrealistically?
3. Why can't Neanderthals migrate to Scandinavia after the glaciers receded?
4. We have no idea what Neanderthal flesh physiology is like. What if they're ALL like this kid...
http://148bcec7bb334341cd98-2fb779bd12ec72d4612275342f2c9187.r31.cf1.rackcdn.c om/05a4f6e90614cbad5e6b9c37237b4202.jpg

What the... I had a long post that got swallowed by the Great Old Ones that live in the Interwebz, it seems.

Quick recap:

1. No, but then the first two thirds of this movie is extremely historically correct for being about vikings. That made me set the bar for my Suspension Of Disbelief VERY low. In short I wasn't expecting realism UNTIL I SAW THE MOVIE.

2. I want some kind of balance. See 1.

3. Because they were all dead before the last ice age ended. We even know where the last ones lived: In a cave in the rock of Gibraltar, looking over the mediterranian. The last ever Neanderthal in the last ever tribe died 25 000 - 30 000 years ago. (I actually always gets a tear in my eye from that one; it is really sad when you think about it. It is very much (New) King Kong's cave where he is the last living specimen and the skeletons of his parents are still laying there (though the Neanderthals buried their dead, but you know what I mean)).

4. We know what they looked like. Short, strong, short arms and legs. Big noses. Muscles and fur do not hold up well against shields, chainmail and the best steel in Europe at the time.

comicshorse

2013-03-26, 08:21 AM

4. We know what they looked like. Short, strong, short arms and legs. Big noses. Muscles and fur do not hold up well against shields, chainmail and the best steel in Europe at the time.

Well they did lose despite heavily outnumbering the village

Jerthanis

2013-03-26, 12:05 PM

There comes a time when jewels cease to sparkle, when the gold loses its luster, when a living room becomes a prison, and all that is left is a man's love for this movie.

I actually happened to just see this movie again recently. I think it's amazing how well done the movie is that it never feels like it's dragging, even though there's only dialogue or narration to fill perhaps 15 minutes of screen time. The dialogue and narration that IS there is so great that almost every line is quotable.

pffh

2013-03-26, 12:35 PM

I think it's a fun, cheesy movie on which to waste an afternoon. Certainly a lot better than "Krull". :-)

Now hold on a minute Krull is an amazingly good bad movie. It has space aliens invading a fantasy land, a guy turns into a tiger and Liam Neeson. What more do you want from a movie?

Giggling Ghast

2013-03-26, 12:44 PM

smellie_hippie

2013-03-26, 12:59 PM

Other good film references... (IMHO)

Soldier with Kurt Russell. I felt it was a futurstic version of Conan
Blood of Heroes with Rutger Hauer. Very grim and gritty and a suprising gem!

Yora

2013-03-26, 01:33 PM

Mordar

2013-03-26, 07:11 PM

And then you decide to take a sharp left turn from reality two thirds into the movie and makes the badguys be cannibalistic neanderthals (that somehow survived in Scandinavia until 950 AD

In all the times that I've watched this movie, did I somehow miss that fact/implication? I always just thought they were a tribe/clan that was a bit more...primal...than our heroes. Consider, perhaps, something like the Celts and the Romans - both contemporaneous, but radically different in culture and advancement.

Oh, and as someone else mentioned...the 13 properly armed and armored warriors did put paid to a ton of the rough-stock. It took cheating to handle the Viking leader, and numbers for the rest.

- M

Zaydos

2013-03-26, 07:23 PM

Now hold on a minute Krull is an amazingly good bad movie. It has space aliens invading a fantasy land, a guy turns into a tiger and Liam Neeson. What more do you want from a movie?

Krull had Liam Neeson? I have new respect for Liam Neeson (Krull might be my top nostalgic movie to watch at the moment). Though to answer your question a musical score like that of the original Conan movie, or Legend. That's all Krull needed.

Cikomyr

2013-03-26, 07:46 PM

pffh

2013-03-26, 07:46 PM

Krull had Liam Neeson? I have new respect for Liam Neeson (Krull might be my top nostalgic movie to watch at the moment). Though to answer your question a musical score like that of the original Conan movie, or Legend. That's all Krull needed.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085811/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1

Yup. When I re watched it on a good bad movie night we were all like "Is that Liam Neeson?" and "Holy **** THAT IS Liam Neeson" and then we giggled like preteen schoolgirls.

comicshorse

2013-03-26, 08:11 PM

Hey everybody has to start somewhere

Lvl45DM!

2013-03-26, 08:52 PM

The movie is a seamless wonder. Damn but if that scene where Conan is practicing his sword play isn't beautifully done nothing is.

Also here. http://www.overthinkingit.com/2011/08/10/conan-the-liberal/ a interesting little article on possible depth to this movie

Tiki Snakes

2013-03-26, 09:07 PM

Only skimmed the start, but it probably is over thinking it a little.
Though, the first and only movie, Conan the Barbarian, was conceived around the central theme of "Strength" as a virtue with the idea being that it would be the first of, like, seven or so films all concentrating on a different virtue or something. All of which went out the window with Conan The Destroyer (of franchises).

Corvus

2013-03-27, 01:14 AM

Ah, Conan. I haven't read the books, but this movie makes me wish I did.

While a fun movie, it really has nothing to do with Robert E. Howard's stories beyond sharing a name (in the same manner as Starship Troopers.)

Most of the Conan stories are short stories that were printed in pulp magazines in the 30s,and are fun reads, though the movie Conan and the book Conan have really different personalities. For starters, the bookConan is not Germanic, but a proto-Celt, and is far smarter, more verbose and with a sense of humour. And rarely does he just wear a loincloth, but is normaly armoured, including at times full plate armour. I'd say the new Conan movie is closer in personality to the book Conan than Arnie's Conan.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-27, 02:29 AM

In all the times that I've watched this movie, did I somehow miss that fact/implication? I always just thought they were a tribe/clan that was a bit more...primal...than our heroes. Consider, perhaps, something like the Celts and the Romans - both contemporaneous, but radically different in culture and advancement.- M

It only makes it better on the surface. Yes, Homo Sapiens lived in Scandinavia by the end of the last ice age; our earliest finds are 12 000 years old. But it is just a matter of polishing a turd; the idea that any kind of "tribals" (cavemen) were living here during the viking era (which, remember is only 1 100 years ago) is about 0,3% less stupid than Neanderthals.

Lvl45DM!

2013-03-27, 03:04 AM

MLai

2013-03-27, 04:19 AM

But it is just a matter of polishing a turd; the idea that any kind of "tribals" (cavemen) were living here during the viking era (which, remember is only 1 100 years ago) is about 0,3% less stupid than Neanderthals.
Would you argue as hard if the movie is about, say, Vikings + 1 Muslim lawyer fighting a dragon? Or an ogre? Or werewolves?

SCIENCE! doesn't dispute you, ofc. But I just don't see your hangup.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-27, 04:37 AM

Would you argue as hard if the movie is about, say, Vikings + 1 Muslim lawyer fighting a dragon? Or an ogre? Or werewolves?

SCIENCE! doesn't dispute you, ofc. But I just don't see your hangup.

I think there are two reasons:

1. Vikings are NEVER portrayed even remotely correct in Hollywood. The one time, ever, they are (no horns! correctly shaped shields! no conan-the-barbarian designed swords and axes! correctly chainmal! set in the correct time period! no horns! correctly looking ships! no horns!!!), the sudden departure from realism is very very jarring indeed when it happens.

2. I would be more accepting of an actual supernatural or mythological threat, as long as it is one that fits into Viking mythology (Wyrms, Draugr etc). I guess this is one of my problems with the choice of enemy beside the historical / archeological: There are so SO many actual things they could have used that fits better, and they had to invent cavemen in the 10th century. Still, it would have been nice with an actual foreshadowing if the threat was indeed magical (showing that some kind of mundane magic working before they left for home, for example)

Spiryt

2013-03-27, 04:57 AM

The 13th Warrior is a fantasy film for pretty much all purposes, so I've never really bothered about 'Viking' portrayal in it...

If he have to be picky, those Norsemen weren't even viking-ing, they were at home. :smalltongue:

Cikomyr

2013-03-27, 05:18 AM

While a fun movie, it really has nothing to do with Robert E. Howard's stories beyond sharing a name (in the same manner as Starship Troopers.)

Most of the Conan stories are short stories that were printed in pulp magazines in the 30s,and are fun reads, though the movie Conan and the book Conan have really different personalities. For starters, the bookConan is not Germanic, but a proto-Celt, and is far smarter, more verbose and with a sense of humour. And rarely does he just wear a loincloth, but is normaly armoured, including at times full plate armour. I'd say the new Conan movie is closer in personality to the book Conan than Arnie's Conan.

For that matter, I heard the 1982 Conan used most of the story of Kull, another character by Robert E. Howard. (the whole "he became king by his own hand" is part of the Kull mythology).

Which is very funny, because Kull the Conqueror was supposed to be some kind of Conan 3, but they had problem with copyright and decided to change the name... back to the original REH

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-27, 05:24 AM

For that matter, I heard the 1982 Conan used most of the story of Kull, another character by Robert E. Howard. (the whole "he became king by his own hand" is part of the Kull mythology).

Yes... I don't remember though... I *think* Kull was in the same universe as Conan but several thousand years earlier? Didn't he become the greatest king Atlantis ever had, or something like that?

Cikomyr

2013-03-27, 06:06 AM

Yes... I don't remember though... I *think* Kull was in the same universe as Conan but several thousand years earlier? Didn't he become the greatest king Atlantis ever had, or something like that?

Something like that, indeed.

It all turned on itself at the end, beautiful irony.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-27, 06:43 AM

Something like that, indeed.

It all turned on itself at the end, beautiful irony.

Well since it was Atlantis, that is sort of a "duh!" :smallwink:
But was it during his reign or afterwards? I don't remember.

Eldan

2013-03-27, 07:02 AM

Cikomyr

2013-03-27, 07:29 AM

The 13th warrior is an interesting movie, no doubt. I really love the first half, but I think it gets quite a bit worse after the evil (whether human or neanderthal doesnt even really matter) is introduced on screen. It started out as a very well made, almost historical movie with some great, well-made Norsemen. Then it became a rather bad fantasy movie. None of the combat scenes every seemed exciting to me, either. The choreography seems quite stilted, I could often not really tell what was going on and I just stopped caring by the time we had the third great battle.

I think it's more of a case that Nothing is Scarier (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NothingIsScarier). See, when the Threat is still an uknown, a mystery, you can let your imagination run wild. Your deepest fears come back and haunt you, you imagine the worst that can happen.

And there was a magnificent buildup to the Threat, let me tell you that. They had to whisper the Ennemy's name, and talked of legends and horrors.

And then, BAM. All the mystery evaporates. It's just cavemen.

The Troubadour

2013-03-27, 08:26 AM

Yeah and look how being faithful turned out :smallyuk:

It was "more" faithful than the 1982 movie, not actually faithful. :-)
Plus, bad movie is bad, regardless of whether it's also a faithful adaptation.

Now hold on a minute Krull is an amazingly good bad movie. It has space aliens invading a fantasy land, a guy turns into a tiger and Liam Neeson. What more do you want from a movie?

I don't dislike it, per se. I just think it's kinda boring.

comicshorse

2013-03-27, 08:37 AM

I think it's more of a case that Nothing is Scarier (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/NothingIsScarier). See, when the Threat is still an uknown, a mystery, you can let your imagination run wild. Your deepest fears come back and haunt you, you imagine the worst that can happen.

And there was a magnificent buildup to the Threat, let me tell you that. They had to whisper the Ennemy's name, and talked of legends and horrors.

And then, BAM. All the mystery evaporates. It's just cavemen.

But at some point the threat has to become known, the wizard has to step out from behind the curtain. I agree the build-up was great and the realization still handled nicely as Antonio Banderas's character goes from shock, to relief, to fury at the fact that he's been terrified with supernatural dread by what turn out to be, as he puts it, 'just men'.
Though men still savage enough to kill everyone which is, as he later realises, still scary. Or as one of the vikings puts it when it is revealed the 'mist wyrm' is a horde of cavalry : 'I'm not sure I wouldn't prefer the dragon'

Spiryt

2013-03-27, 11:56 AM

The 13th warrior is an interesting movie, no doubt. I really love the first half, but I think it gets quite a bit worse after the evil (whether human or neanderthal doesnt even really matter) is introduced on screen. It started out as a very well made, almost historical movie with some great, well-made Norsemen. Then it became a rather bad fantasy movie. None of the combat scenes every seemed exciting to me, either. The choreography seems quite stilted, I could often not really tell what was going on and I just stopped caring by the time we had the third great battle.

Heh, I got precisely opposite opinion (maybe not completely, but meh) - first half of the movie is rather boring, and there's really nothing historical or well made about those Norsemen.

While second half finally kicks in, with fast action and that cheesy/gloomy atmosphere and battle scenes seemed really good for the genre - violent, chaotic, intense, hard to follow, like actual acts of brutality, especially in the night, in complete chaos.

Avilan the Grey

2013-03-27, 03:56 PM

Heh, I got precisely opposite opinion (maybe not completely, but meh) - first half of the movie is rather boring, and there's really nothing historical or well made about those Norsemen.

Apart from the fact that for the first time in Hollywood history, the Norse look and behave like Norse and not like either English knights or fantasy barbarians? It is, to date, the most realistic portrayal of Vikings in Hollywood history.

Zaydos

2013-03-27, 09:49 PM

For that matter, I heard the 1982 Conan used most of the story of Kull, another character by Robert E. Howard. (the whole "he became king by his own hand" is part of the Kull mythology).

Which is very funny, because Kull the Conqueror was supposed to be some kind of Conan 3, but they had problem with copyright and decided to change the name... back to the original REH

Conan became king by his own hand too, and it's a big part of the first published Conan story... which was a reworked Kull story. The bigger one is that Thulsa Doom was a recurring enemy of Kull's, but movie Doom has more in common with comic Doom from what I've heard (never read the comics) who was Conan's enemy.

Actually the movie draws upon certain specific Conan stories: the tomb he gets his gear in was a Carter, deCamp story; the tower is reminiscent though unlikely based on the Tower of the Elephant (chronologically the first Howard, Conan story); the scene on the cross is actually from a Conan story... actually most of the film after he gets to the tomb is drawn from Conan stories.

I keep hearing that the new movie was more faithful, but... I've read more of the short stories than anyone I know and honestly there are three ways it was more faithful and beyond that the old one captured more of the events and spirit of Conan. It didn't have him start as a slave, and it referenced his past as a pirate, lastly the actor caught more of the "smart, polyglot" part of Conan. Overall though... even the purist in me prefers the 82 movie; it's dragged down by being Conan in that it gives the wrong idea of itself and the books, but the new one does that just as much and is also kind of not good.

Sorry, rant over.

cucchulainnn

2013-03-27, 11:31 PM

Apart from the fact that for the first time in Hollywood history, the Norse look and behave like Norse and not like either English knights or fantasy barbarians? It is, to date, the most realistic portrayal of Vikings in Hollywood history.

i agree and it makes me one sad panda. 13th warrior was more like a pennsic war buddy road trip movie then any thing else.

a bunch of guys in mixed matched armour (some late period plate, some scale, come leather) get together drink and have sex wile traveling, finally getting to their destination only to fight tuchuxs.

all kidding aside

Zaydos i agree with every thing you wrote. john milius seemed to take bits and pieces from a lot of different stories and hobbled them together. and it worked. it is a dam good movie.

the main difference for me was conan him self. the character in the books would not be able to deal with being a slave for that long, he would either spend every waking moment trying to escape and if that was not possible i think he would have died of depression or during an escape attempt. other wise i think they did a pretty good job of it. over the years i have heard a lot of complaints about arnolds lack of acting. not being able to deliver his lines. but conan was always described a speaking with a barbarous accent for which a german accent works well.

doom was kull's moriarty. conan's was a wizard named thoth amon, who conan encountered several times over a period of years in several stories. funnyly enough thoth amon was in the 2nd movie for all of 5 minutes then was promptly killed.

valeria was in the story red nails, where she was valeria of the scarlet brotherhood, she was a swashbuckling pirate of the pirates of the caribbean sort. and no she was not his girlfriend. not from a lack of his trying. conan was sniffing after her like a hound dog after a possum, all the while she was giving him the big brush off. slapping him down hard.

her part in the movie seemed to mimic conan's true love, Bêlit. in the story "queen of the black coast" she is killed by a winged monster, in the finally when conan fights it he almost loses but she comes back from the dead and rescues him, after which he gives her a viking funeral. the scene is almost exactly like the movie.

"The headlong rush of the winged one had not wavered. It towered over the prostrate Cimmerian like a black shadow, arms thrown wide--a glimmer of white flashed between it and its victim.

In one mad instant she was there--a tense white shape, vibrant with love fierce as a she-panther's. The dazed Cimmerian saw between him and the onrushing death, her lithe figure, shimmering like ivory beneath the moon; he saw the blaze of her dark eyes, the thick cluster of her burnished hair; her bosom heaved, her red lips were parted, she cried out sharp and ringing at the ring of steel as she thrust at the winged monster's breast.

"Belit!" screamed Conan. She flashed a quick glance at him, and in her dark eyes he saw her love flaming, a naked elemental thing of raw fire and molten lava. Then she was gone, and the Cimmerian saw only the winged fiend which had staggered back in unwonted fear, arms lifted as if to fend off attack. And he knew that Belit in truth lay on her pyre on the Tigress's deck. In his ears rang her passionate cry: "Were I still in death and you fighting for life I would come back from the abyss--""

robert e howard - queen of the black coast.

i still haven't seen the new movie. as a conan fanboy i can't bring my self to do it.

cucchulainnn

2013-03-28, 12:08 AM

an interesting tidbit.
this is from beyond the black river, in which conan reveals his first encounter with civilization.

“It's nothing to me,” the other retorted. “I'm a mercenary. I sell my sword to the highest bidder. I never planted wheat and never will, so long as there are other harvests to be reaped with the sword. But you Hyborians have expanded as far as you'll be allowed to expand. You've crossed the marches, burned a few villages, exterminated a few clans and pushed back the frontier to Black River; but I doubt if you'll even be able to hold what you've conquered, and you'll never push the frontier any further westward. Your idiotic king doesn't understand conditions here. He won't send you enough reinforcements, and there are not enough settlers to withstand the shock of a concerted attack from across the river.”

“But the Picts are divided into small clans,” persisted Balthus. “They'll never unite. We can whip any single clan.”

“Or any three or four clans,” admitted the slayer. “But some day a man will rise and unite thirty or forty clans, just as was done among the Cimmerians, when the Gundermen tried to push the border northward, years ago. They tried to colonize the southern marches of Cimmeria: destroyed a few small clans, built a fort-town, Venarium — you've heard the tale.”

“So I have indeed,” replied Balthus, wincing. The memory of that red disaster was a black blot in the chronicles of a proud and warlike people. “My uncle was at Venarium when the Cimmerians swarmed over the walls. He was one of the few who escaped that slaughter. I've heard him tell the tale, many a time. The barbarians swept out of the hills in a ravening horde, without warning, and stormed Venarium with such fury none could stand before them. Men, women, and children were butchered. Venarium was reduced to a mass of charred ruins, as it is to this day. The Aquilonians were driven back across the marches, and have never since tried to colonize the Cimmerian country. But you speak of Venarium familiarly. Perhaps you were there?”

“I was,” grunted the other. “I was one of the horde that swarmed over the walls. I hadn't yet seen fifteen snows, but already my name was repeated about the council fires.”

Balthus involuntarily recoiled, staring. It seemed incredible that the man walking tranquilly at his side should have been one of those screeching, blood-mad devils that poured over the walls of Venarium on that long-gone day to make her streets run crimson.

“Then you, too, are a barbarian!” he exclaimed involuntarily.

The other nodded, without taking offense.

“I am Conan, a Cimmerian.”

Cikomyr

2013-03-28, 06:11 AM

man, it's cheesy..

... but IT SOUNDS AWESOME

.... wait a minute, so the movies WERE faithful

cucchulainnn

2013-03-28, 11:01 AM

man, it's cheesy..

... but IT SOUNDS AWESOME

.... wait a minute, so the movies WERE faithful

in weird kinda way, yea, they where faithful. even conan the destroyer. well except for jarjarbiks, aaaahhhh i mean the thief and the aforementioned being a slave.

:smile: howard's writing style was more then cheesy. it was deep fried cheese drenched in cheese sauce. i eat it up and love it. he claimed that while writing the conan stories he felt as though conan was in the room with him telling the stories of which he only transcribed em.

Zaydos

2013-03-28, 11:41 AM

man, it's cheesy..

... but IT SOUNDS AWESOME

.... wait a minute, so the movies WERE faithful

If you ignore the part with him being a slave.

Radar

2013-03-28, 11:54 AM

:smile: howard's writing style was more then cheesy. it was deep fried cheese drenched in cheese sauce. i eat it up and love it. he claimed that while writing the conan stories he felt as though conan was in the room with him telling the stories of which he only transcribed em.
Wait a minute... so the monologue at the begining of the movie was supposed to be from Howard himself? This would be quite awesome. :smallsmile:

cucchulainnn

2013-03-28, 12:16 PM

Wait a minute... so the monologue at the begining of the movie was supposed to be from Howard himself? This would be quite awesome. :smallsmile:

that is kind of the opening paragraph of the story phoenix in the sword, the first appearance of thoth-amom. who by the way was the high priest and wizard of set the snake god in conan the barbarian.

"Know, oh prince, that between the years when the oceans drank Atlantis and the gleaming cities, and the years of the rise of the Sons of Aryas, there was an Age undreamed of, when shining kingdoms lay spread across the world like blue mantles beneath the stars - Nemedia, Ophir, Brythunia, Hyperborea, Zamora with its dark-haired women and towers of spider-haunted mystery, Zingara with its chivalry, Koth that bordered on the pastoral lands of Shem, Stygia with its shadow-guarded tombs, Hyrkania whose riders wore steel and silk and gold. But the proudest kingdom of the world was Aquilonia, reigning supreme in the dreaming west. Hither came Conan, the Cimmerian, black-haired, sullen-eyed,sword in hand, a thief, a reaver, a slayer, with gigantic melancholies and gigantic mirth, to tread the jeweled thrones of the Earth under his sandalled feet."

- The Nemedian Chronicles.

Zaydos

2013-03-28, 12:22 PM

Cikomyr

2013-03-28, 12:31 PM

If you ignore the part with him being a slave.

Faithful, as in "Cheesy but awesome"

Zaydos

2013-03-28, 12:35 PM

Faithful, as in "Cheesy but awesome"

Oh on that count definitely. There's a reason it's one of the very few movies I watch it every few years.

Mordar

2013-03-28, 12:52 PM

Something I've seen mentioned here a time or two that has caused some consternation on my part...the idea that the Arnold/de Laurentiis 1982 Conan was either "dumb" or simply "not as smart as the book Conan". I've read all of the Howard Conan stories (disclaimer: The de Camp versions, primarily), and a great deal of his other work (Solomon Kane, Kull, etc) and didn't find much evidence of differential intelligence between the film and the books/stories.[NOTE: I am not addressing Conan the Destroyer in this post. Much of that was just dumb. The parts that weren't dumb were annoyingly stupid.]

Taking aside the issue of Arnold's accent and English-as-second/third-language (understandably, though not appropriately, this can lead to misperception as to the intelligence of the speaker...even though it may reflect more on the intelligence of the listener), what elements in CtB suggested Conan wasn't of at least reasonable intelligence? There are a few issues, I admit, with his first fight in the pit (more badly acted, I think, then reflective of the character intelligence) but beyond that, he acts in a reasonable fashion for a person with limited experience in new surroundings.

What am I missing? Not bringing rope to the tower of Set? He didn't need it. Going along against Doom? Didn't turn out well, but at least it was a bluff/disguise attempt, not a frontal assault. Getting drunk and spending/losing all of his gains? That is Conan - treasure exists to be spent.

I see suggestions that the Marmo Conan was demonstrably brighter than Arnold's version, and my primary memory of the Marmo film was Conan surrendering to the guard, going unarmed into their custody and counting on being able to overwhelm a dozen armed and armored men alone. That doesn't exactly present him as a brilliant individual to my way of thinking, outcome to the contrary.

Thoughts?

- M

cucchulainnn

2013-03-28, 12:56 PM

As a note The Phoenix on the Sword was also the first Conan story, and a re-write of a Kull story.

Also in some Conan stories he references driving the towers of the Snake God Set out of Aquilonia... I can't remember if this was something he did as king or as a general before usurping the throne.

I love Conan.

me too, love conan too. he was such a great character.

my first experience of conan was the ace/lancer books. since then i have read all the originals but some times it is hard for me to remember which aspects come form which. i always though it was really cool how the one constant between ages where the picts. starting with brule the spear slayer best friend of king kull, culminating in bran mak morn fighting the romans hundreds of thousands years later.

howard's world takes place in our world but with an alternate time line. at the beginning of civilization/time there was a continent with several large islands off it's coast of which atlantis was one. as time when by the continental plates moved destroying the civilizations forming the hyborian land mass. eventually they moved again forming our current continents. as each of these movements happened the civilizations where destroyed and all memory of the proceeding age was forgotten except for one ethnic group. the picts of roman age scotland. they where the only ones to remember who they where. the atlatians of kull evolved into the cimerians of conan and finally the celts of our own age. so yes conan was proto celt.

in the cormac mac art stories it is hinted at that kull, conan and cormac are all related. i believe the story is tigers of the sea but may be mistake.

cucchulainnn

2013-03-28, 01:23 PM

Mordar i agree with our post. most people that i've encountered that has a problem with it are conan fanboy who where upset about the him being enslaved. which really dose fundamentally change the character and that he was a body builder with a really thick accent playing the part. the accent like you say gives the impression of a lack of intelligence. it didn't fit with their vision of the character.

for a while i was one of those fanboys. :smallredface:

well guess what what we see in our minds eye when reading a book is never gonna match what can be done in a movie. i've come to terms with it.

Killer Angel

2013-03-29, 11:17 AM

Mordar

2013-03-29, 11:32 AM

Yeah, one of the most notable difference, IMO is that in the books, Conan is a true leader of men, he's capable to lead armies, to win the hearts of pirates, bandits, and so on. This is almost absent in the film(s).

Well, in CtB anyway, consider that he earned the respect of his tutor(s), won his freedom from his "owner", kindled loyalty in Subatai such that he was willing to die (and cry!) for him, and not only "sacked" Valaryia but she, an apparently capable and experienced thief was willing to follow him into the bowels of Doom's stronghold. Then there is the Wizard, but we don't really see much there to be impressed by in CtB.

Not so bad, in my opinion. No opportunity to rise to mercenary captain or the like [ASIDE: That'd be a tough bit to pull off in a single film - how to show the rise of Conan to leadership of an established group without it seeming hokey. Much better suited to a good TV series...], but a reasonably done effort.

Again, no real comments on Destroyer. So much bad in that, even the good was swallowed up and lost.

- M

Traab

2013-03-29, 11:46 AM

Hey Mordar, talking about the language thing, you are most likely correct. When I was in basic, there was this guy, a huge musclebound hulk. He spoke slow, with thick speech like he was barely capable of talking at all. Most of us honestly thought he was slightly brain damaged and had managed to squeak through the bare minimum to enlist. Turns out this guy is a college grad, professional bodyguard, was going through special ops training at some point, etc etc etc. Apparently, english wasnt even his second language, that was just a horrible accent he had. Dude was smart, scary smart, once you took the time to actually talk to him. So yeah, a thick accent really makes people drop 30-50 points off what they assume your IQ to be.

Surrealistik

2013-03-29, 11:48 AM

Awesome movie.

And let's not forget the musical!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBGOQ7SsJrw

Tiki Snakes

2013-03-29, 11:52 AM

Well, in CtB anyway, consider that he earned the respect of his tutor(s), won his freedom from his "owner", kindled loyalty in Subatai such that he was willing to die (and cry!) for him, and not only "sacked" Valaryia but she, an apparently capable and experienced thief was willing to follow him into the bowels of Doom's stronghold. Then there is the Wizard, but we don't really see much there to be impressed by in CtB.

Not so bad, in my opinion. No opportunity to rise to mercenary captain or the like [ASIDE: That'd be a tough bit to pull off in a single film - how to show the rise of Conan to leadership of an established group without it seeming hokey. Much better suited to a good TV series...], but a reasonably done effort.

Again, no real comments on Destroyer. So much bad in that, even the good was swallowed up and lost.

- M

Given the intention for the first film to examine strength and the sequels to examine other virtues, presumably leadership would have been a greater theme in a later entry in the projected series. So we get hints that he has that kind of pull, but the film does not examine it at all.

Killer Angel

2013-03-29, 12:28 PM

Again, no real comments on Destroyer. So much bad in that, even the good was swallowed up and lost.

mmm... at least, Grace Jones already knew Conan's name, so it's a hint to the fact that the barbarian was an important and charismatic figure. Maybe?

tomandtish

2013-03-30, 04:11 PM

MLai

2013-03-30, 08:33 PM

I'd agree with Tiki on this. This music is so awesome, my wife used the love theme for her processional when we got married.
Chose a theme from Conan The Barbarian. For her wedding.
Wow.
What a woman. :smallredface:

Tiki Snakes

2013-03-30, 09:21 PM

It amuses me to no end that the alternate title for that theme is, well, you know. (http://youtu.be/Zikp0PiBQEw)

It is a genuinely beautiful piece of music, though.

tomandtish

2013-03-31, 01:03 PM

Chose a theme from Conan The Barbarian. For her wedding.
Wow.
What a woman. :smallredface:

Thanks. Actually, all our music was from movie scores. Our recessional? The Imperial March. I married a great woman! :smallbiggrin:

Radar

2013-03-31, 02:17 PM

Thanks. Actually, all our music was from movie scores. Our recessional? The Imperial March. I married a great woman! :smallbiggrin:
It's... it's as if this comics (http://xkcd.com/108/) was 100% true! :smallbiggrin:

tomandtish

2013-03-31, 09:55 PM

It's... it's as if this comics (http://xkcd.com/108/) was 100% true! :smallbiggrin:

Doubtful. She'd beat me to a pulp for listening to MC Hammer! :smallwink:

But we do have a date tonight (once I get off work) for Walking Dead and Game of Thrones!

This summer she suprised me with tickets to a showing of Conan (1982) at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin. Still holds up well!

And yes, she does game occasionally.

MLai

2013-03-31, 10:00 PM

Doubtful. She'd beat me to a pulp for listening to MC Hammer! :smallwink:
But we do have a date tonight (once I get off work) for Walking Dead and Game of Thrones!
This summer she suprised me with tickets to a showing of Conan (1982) at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin. Still holds up well!
And yes, she does game occasionally.
Stop gloating before someone murders you. :smallmad:

Lvl45DM!

2013-04-01, 06:47 AM

Stop gloating before someone murders you. :smallmad:

Seconded :smallannoyed:

Avilan the Grey

2013-04-01, 12:35 PM

Seconded :smallannoyed:

Thirded. Definitely.

Cikomyr

2013-04-01, 01:08 PM

Stop gloating before someone murders you. :smallmad:

Seconded :smallannoyed:

Thirded. Definitely.

Everybody will find their special one one day, guys..

I mean, the franchise that represent my GF and I's commitment is V for Vendetta. She presented it to me on the first night we were together, and I gave her the comic next time we saw each other :P

For St-Valentine, a sweet gift I sent her was "happy St-Valentine" with a picture of Delenn and Sheridan. She loved it.

tomandtish

2013-04-01, 01:55 PM

In fairness, she's not perfect. She actually likes Highlander 2 (probably because she saw it first). She's also made me sleep on the couch for stating that I like Firefly better than Sarah Connor Chronicles. :smallmad:

The Glyphstone

2013-04-01, 02:01 PM

Stop gloating before someone murders you. :smallmad:

Does she like the Chronicles of Riddick too? Because Necromongers keep what they kill, so you might be in danger.:smallsmile:

tomandtish

2013-04-01, 03:19 PM

Like me, she loved Pitch Black, but didn't like the sequel as much.

We also both agree Conan the Destroyer is pretty bad, and the 2011 remake was meh.

The Troubadour

2013-04-01, 05:28 PM

We also both agree Conan the Destroyer is pretty bad,(...)

Dagoth take you both, then! :-P

Mordar

2013-04-01, 06:07 PM

Dagoth take you both, then! :-P

Did you mean rubber-suit-floppy-arms-horn-as-drain-plug Dagoth? :smalltongue:

cucchulainnn

2013-04-01, 09:54 PM

Like me, she loved Pitch Black, but didn't like the sequel as much.

We also both agree Conan the Destroyer is pretty bad, and the 2011 remake was meh.

every body agrees that conan the destroyer is bad. :smallyuk:
any one who says other wise is either lying to themselves or us. :smallwink:

MLai

2013-04-02, 07:14 AM

I thought Dagoth was the best part of the whole movie, and I thought the movie was the bee's knees. I liked this movie better than the first one, actually.

But then I was a kid.

The Troubadour

2013-04-02, 08:26 AM

Did you mean rubber-suit-floppy-arms-horn-as-drain-plug Dagoth? :smalltongue:

...Maaaybe. :-P

mangosta71

2013-04-02, 09:31 AM

CtB has one of the most magnificent soundtracks ever composed. The music is easily the best part of the entire movie. It's a shame CtD just used a sloppy rehash of it.

CtD has the personality of an ADHD schizophrenic on meth. The movie never decides whether it's action, comedy, drama, or romance. It tries to do too many things, and due to the lack of focus ends up not doing any of them well.

MLai

2013-04-02, 10:06 AM

CtD has the personality of an ADHD schizophrenic on meth. The movie never decides whether it's action, comedy, drama, or romance.
There was drama and romance in it? :smalleek:
Say it ain't so!! :smallfrown:

Traab

2013-04-02, 03:16 PM

There was drama and romance in it? :smalleek:
Say it ain't so!! :smallfrown:

Didnt the young princess chick fall for conan?

tomandtish

2013-04-02, 04:04 PM

Yes, the 15yo princess did fall for the 37 year old barbarian.... I'm not sure it's that romantic though....

For those who want more Arnold Conan though....

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2479722/

snoopy13a

2013-04-02, 06:23 PM

The funniest aspect of Conan the Destroyer was the casting of Wilt Chamberlain as the protector of the princess' "virtue." If you aren't familiar with the mythos of Wilt, google "Wilt Chamberlain and 20,000."

Tiki Snakes

2013-04-02, 07:00 PM

There was drama and romance in it? :smalleek:
Say it ain't so!! :smallfrown:

Didnt the young princess chick fall for conan?

Romance!

Yes, the 15yo princess did fall for the 37 year old barbarian.... I'm not sure it's that romantic though....

For those who want more Arnold Conan though....

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt2479722/

He wasn't interested, it was thoroughly unrequited. Drama!

The funniest aspect of Conan the Destroyer was the casting of Wilt Chamberlain as the protector of the princess' "virtue." If you aren't familiar with the mythos of Wilt, google "Wilt Chamberlain and 20,000."

Also Peril!
No, seriously though its a terrible movie. Though the Chamber of Mirrors (http://youtu.be/nwNuSf1pJWo) theme is actually quite good and one of the few genuinely original pieces Basil did for the film, I think. It's good enough that it made it onto the City of Prague orchestra's deluxe re-recording of the Conan the Barbarian soundtrack as a bonus track.
(Surprisingly hard to find the track online, apparently).