How a Wizard can kill you.

[Humble Master]

Lets say a 20th level Wizard (with an appropriate number of magical items) is walking along and comes across a 20th level Commoner (without magical items). The Wizard, decides to kill said Commoner. Obviously this is a very one sided fight but how many ways can said Wizard kill said Commoner? That is what this thread is for. Lets se how many different/ strange/ funny/ embarrassing ways can a 20th level Wizard kill a 20th level Commoner?

[Snowbluff]

High five!

(Fatal touch spell.)

[Tvtyrant]

Flesh to Stone
Fabricate
Stone to Flesh

Sell the pig/farm animal to a nearby farm for a horrible way to die.

[Karnith]

Polymorph Any Object him into a fish (or some other aquatic creature).

[Lightlawbliss]

polymorph any object into a thin piece of paper/glass/stone/whatever and tear/smash/simular the commoner up.

use prestidigitation to start a landslide/avalanche

use a save or die spell

dominate them + clever word choice

polymorph any object into week predatory animal and throw them in the farmer's barn.

[ArqArturo]

First, disjunction

Telekinesis to lift up in the air

Polymporph any object into a rubber ball.

Limited Wish so that he still feels

Telekinesis to bounce it all around

Edit: Alternatively, Disjunction + Bestow curse+ Blindness+ Baleful Polymorph (mouse) +Rapid/Quicken Summon Monster (cats. Lots of cats).

[elonin]

These options seem like a bit of overkill for a commoner. Web then set web on fire is fine for a commoner.

I'll admit that flesh to stone then stone shape is fun if you want to make your castle out of commoner.

[Kazyan]

Full attacks with ubiquitous quarterstaff, if the commoner is unarmed. Buff spells to taste.

[Tvtyrant]

These options seem like a bit of overkill for a commoner. Web then set web on fire is fine for a commoner.

I'll admit that flesh to stone then stone shape is fun if you want to make your castle out of commoner.

Can you disjunction or dispel flesh to stone? Because if so it would be awesome to remove the flesh to stones all at once and drop the entire castle on someone. It could even be its own epic spell "buried in commoners."

[Gerrtt]

It's certainly not classy, but a meteor swarm will do the trick. Kind of a waste of a 9th level spell.

A plane shift to the positive energy plane is getting slightly more classy. Kind of a waste of a 7th level spell.

A shivering touch followed by a coup de grace is even classier, as now we're talking about taking that commoner out with a 3rd level spell, though you could certainly empower it to be a 5th level spell for a more guaranteed success rate.

[JaronK]

Use Mindrape to reprogram Commoner into his own personal servant, thus killing his mind.

Clone Commoner, Kill Commoner with Finger of Death, Kill Clone of Commoner with the same, Reanimate Commoner with Animate Dread Warrior, Haunt Shift Commoner into Commoner's own original body. I don't know why, but you could.

Plane Shift Commoner to Positive Energy Plane so he explodes due to being too alive. Death by living too hard.

JaronK

[Humble Master]

These options seem like a bit of overkill for a commoner. Web then set web on fire is fine for a commoner.

I'll admit that flesh to stone then stone shape is fun if you want to make your castle out of commoner. They are overkill. The point of this thread is just to find out how many different funny/weird/inventive ways a Wizard can kill someone.

[Snowbluff]

They are overkill. The point of this thread is just to find out how many different funny/weird/inventive ways a Wizard can kill someone.

Is it? Mostly I've been here is transmutation. :smalltongue:

[Lightlawbliss]

Is it? Mostly I've been here is transmutation. :smalltongue:

Gate in ___ and have it kill commoner for you

summon something then fly up into the air and wait

grab big rock, fly up into the air and drop rock on commoner

fly high into the air and create a small moon/asteroid/hill/mountain over the commoner

grab commoner, fly up into space (your safe tx to your already in place daily buffs) or if you want to be nice to the commoner, let go of him over a bed of spikes before you reach space.

there, no transmutation (besides the normal daily buffs)

[Emmerask]

Blackfire, then watch the commoner run into an arbitrary large crowd of other commoners which will also die :smallwink:

[Kornaki]

Beat him over the head with your quarterstaff.

Actually, the commoner has no magic items but still might have access to WBL - if he paid an adventuring group to be his body guard (with some sort of ability to summon them if he is attacked somehow) the wizard could end up with the short straw in this arrangement.

I would imagine that a level 20 party being paid a level 20 character's WBL to pop in every now and then and protect the guy from maniacal wizards (after which they get the loot) would be an easy sell

[Emmerask]

A lvl20 commoner has around 50 hp, a quarterstaff without any none wizardy feats n stuff does not do that ^^

[Ramza00]

Sic his familiar on said commoner (without buff spells)

[Snowbluff]

there, no transmutation (besides the normal daily buffs)

:smallmad:
Yeah, sure. Except that most flight spells are transmutations.
:smallannoyed:

[Deophaun]

Empowered apocalypse from the sky: Kill all the commoners!

[Illarion]

Death by living too hard.

JaronK

That's how I plan on dying.

[Snowbluff]

Empowered apocalypse from the sky: Kill all the commoners!

Pfft, BOOOOORING!

Threaten to use the spell if the commoners do not bring you the head of the one you want to kill.

[Squirrel_Dude]

At that level the wizard could probably slap the commoner to death, if he wanted to.

If he's a Lich, the wizard could slap the guy, watch as he becomes paralyzed, and then bury him alive.

[mregecko]

Defenestrating Sphere

[Deophaun]

Pfft, BOOOOORING!
The one day casting time makes it difficult to do on the road. So, I have to amend it:
Craft Contingent Spell + apocalypse from the sky + "Pull my finger."

[Wings of Peace]

The wizard Mind Rape's the commoner into wanting to be a part of the commoner rail gun. After a lifetime of plain but unstressful servitude the wizard reverts the commoner to his original persona on his death bed whereupon the commoner passes away with the realization that his entire life has been spent doing nothing but menial labor.

[ericgrau]

In the middle of a city:
Insanity
Polymorph into a mind flayer (does not grant Sus nor SLAs, does grant tentacle lashing)
Let the locals take care of the rest.

[nedz]

Fistfight.
Seriously, the Wizard has higher BAB and vastly more HP. Why waste a spell.

[Lightlawbliss]

:smallmad:
Yeah, sure. Except that most flight spells are transmutations.
:smallannoyed:

most wizards by lvl 20 will have some form of flying in their daily buffs or given by a magic item. Seriously, it isn't hard for a wizard to be flying all day. edit: and as you may have noticed, I did say I was ignoring daily buffs in the no transmutation comment)

and on tobic: levitate the commoner, get out of range, use some for of mind control to convince them to attack you anyway (being a reasonable action and all this is something you can do at a very low level without much trying), and wait for them to kill themself via nat 1s.

[Krobar]

Gate in a Battle Dragon from Ysgard and tell it to kill the commoner.

Or

Shapechange into a beholder. That's always good for some laughs.

[hydraa]

Pit fiend venom

[ericgrau]

No transmutation?

Raise dead an army of zombies.
Dominate the commoner.
Dominate some musicians.
Direct the commoner and musicians to perform Thriller until the commoner drops.
Direct the zombies to join until the commoner stops, then kill him with 80s style poorly exaggerated movements.

[hydraa]

20 foot plus high room (or whatever is needed to exceed tumble skill)
Teleportation circle to designated spot on ceiling directly above the same teleportation circle


Wizard with crossbow (crossbow with vorpal bolts) {these bolts only cost about 1450 each, did i do my math correct}

[JaronK]

This is no longer possible due to the SpC nerf, but before that:

1. Use divination to learn where and when the Commoner was born.
2. Go to that location, cast Hindsight to look into the past and see the Commoner just before birth
3. Cast Detect Magic through Hindsight... but add the following metamagics: Snowcasting, Flash Frost Spell, Fell Drain.

Result: The commoner retroactively aborted inside the womb, then turns into a wight and eats his way out.

JaronK

[Emmerask]

This is no longer possible due to the SpC nerf, but before that:

1. Use divination to learn where and when the Commoner was born.
2. Go to that location, cast Hindsight to look into the past and see the Commoner just before birth
3. Cast Detect Magic through Hindsight... but add the following metamagics: Snowcasting, Flash Frost Spell, Fell Drain.

Result: The commoner retroactively aborted inside the womb, then turns into a wight and eats his way out.

JaronK

Problem is that
a) it was in an alternate timeline, the commoner will still be right in front of you once you return
b) you did not do it because there was no challenge to kill that specific commoner since he did not exist ^^

[Snowbluff]

The one day casting time makes it difficult to do on the road. So, I have to amend it:
Craft Contingent Spell + apocalypse from the sky + "Pull my finger." BRAVO!

This is no longer possible due to the SpC nerf, but before that:

1. Use divination to learn where and when the Commoner was born.
2. Go to that location, cast Hindsight to look into the past and see the Commoner just before birth
3. Cast Detect Magic through Hindsight... but add the following metamagics: Snowcasting, Flash Frost Spell, Fell Drain.

Result: The commoner retroactively aborted inside the womb, then turns into a wight and eats his way out.

JaronK
You can still teleport through time to kill him if you need to that. :smalltongue:

[Yael]

Proggramed Ammesia to make him think that he has a suicidal behabior and he is about to jump from an Ice Pillar that you'll cast in that second, in the bottom there's a hole (Plane Shift) to the Abyss~~

Or just Meteor Swarm him, maybe just an Iceberg would make it interesting~~

[DaedalusMkV]

Create a Teleportation Circle with an exit point ten feet above the circle. Encase it in a Forcecage. Teleport the Commoner into it. Or just shove him in, then cast the Forcecage. Whatever. Death by falling damage, 1d6 at a time... :smallamused:

Create an Ice Assassin of the Commoner, then cast a couple of buffs on it and send it into a one-sided fistfight to the death.

Hit the poor guy with Feeblemind, then follow up with your favorite source of Int, Wis or Cha Damage, cast Major Creation to cover him with tasty fish sauce and leave him to be eaten by local wildlife.

Use Suggestion, worded "Go give a big, long hug to a Dire Bear. Cause Bear Hugs are fun."

Lethal spells are too easy to kill with. I prefer doing my killing with nonlethal attacks. :smallcool:

[fryplink]

Buff your strength to absurd heights, (you need to be able to carry a 900 lbs piano in your arms) fly high above the commoner (and his friends), and then cast summon instrument (electing to summon a piano into your arms).

[Slipperychicken]

Cast Mindrape so he thinks he's a shark, then set him free into the ocean.

Cast Mindrape so he thinks that he's a circus acrobat, watch him die hilariously.

[Snails]

I think most of these lack style.

Magic Jar + Contingency + Suggestion could be employed to get the Commoner to get himself killed by the hand on another, while the wizard has an alibi.

[Kuulvheysoon]

Dominate a Gravorg (MM2) and have it use it's reverse gravity SLA to hilarious effect. 4d6 of falling damage over and over and over and over and over and...

[Doorhandle]

A lvl20 commoner has around 50 hp, a quarterstaff without any none wizardy feats n stuff does not do that ^^

So? Just wail on the bastard. What's he going to do, scream MORE?

Closer to the topic:
Use any variant of create pit.
Feed him a delayed blast fireball.
Make a living delayed blast fireball and feed him to that.
Turn into a pyrohydra and eat him. Cook as you chew!

[DMVerdandi]

Fireball:smallcool:

[Snowbluff]

Gate in a black hole through your gate network...

But he'd see it coming, so instead give him a space suit or DnD equivalent. Place a large planetoid nearby in orbit or other solid object. Reserve gravity to shoot him from the black hole and into the planetoid.

[Krobar]

My wizard has improved grapple, so he takes down the commoner and chokes him to death with an Ezekiel Choke. Did I mention the contingent Balor Nimbus?

[Grod_The_Giant]

how many different ways can a 20th level Wizard kill a 20th level Commoner?
I dunno, how many spells are there in 3.5?

[ericgrau]

Trap him in a room. Use telekinesis telekinetic sphere or whatever. Tell him he must solve the small print puzzle on the barrel to escape. The puzzle says "I prepared explosive runes this morning", the barrel contains gunpowder.

[nedz]

No need to kill him: cast Baleful Polymorph and turn him into a frog.

[sparkyinbozo]

Transmute some or all of the commoner to a metal via polymorph any object, then dominate monster on a pack of rust monsters.

[Lightlawbliss]

I dunno, how many spells are there in 3.5?

but not all spells will kill him and some spells can kill him in multiple ways or be used in many combos.

and if you really want to know how many spells there are, here is an incomplete list (http://dnd.freeminded.org/tables/DnD3.5Index-Spells-Summaries.pdf)

[Snowbluff]

but not all spells will kill him and some spells can kill him in multiple ways or be used in many combos.

and if you really want to know how many spells there are, here is an incomplete list (http://dnd.freeminded.org/tables/DnD3.5Index-Spells-Summaries.pdf)

Alright, let's start with prestidigitation.

Make something deadly taste good. Feed it to the commoner. He'll ask for seconds until it kills him.

[Drake2009]

Programmed amnesia. He thinks he is your loyal servant and does anything you wish. Make a code word that makes him start talking about his master the litch. Send him to talk to a few paladins.... Instant doom.

[Humble Master]

I'm loving these.

Some ones I came up with.
Gate him into a Star/Supernova/celestial cataclysm
Use Illusions to make a pool of lava look like a big pile of food/money/women

[Slipperychicken]

Programmed amnesia. He thinks he is your loyal servant and does anything you wish. Make a code word that makes him start talking about his master the litch. Send him to talk to a few paladins.... Instant doom.

Paladins would, out of both mercy and expedience, take him alive for questioning.

[lsfreak]

Catch him while he's in a very large crowd, with with a bottleneck of some kind. An example might be the vomitorium (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vomitorium) of a colosseum. Cast ghost sound of an animal roar (only requires CL 4 to get a lion roar) such that the ensuing panicked crowd rushes away from the sound and into the bottleneck. Cast Wall of Iron on the far side of the bottleneck so that those next to it are crushed by the weight of thousands or tens of thousands of people trying desperately to escape the "lion." (The ensuing stampede will likely kill people anyways, but blocking the exit allows a bit more finesse).

[Kane0]

High five!

(Fatal touch spell.)
This made me laugh the most. I'm imagining a massively meta-magicked shocking grasp high five.

Quickened Extended Hold person, Extended Flaming Sphere, keep walking.

Nothing. Keep walking, then scry him when you reach the next tavern. Observe him being killed and/or eaten by whatever was following you.

Rock to Mud (or soften earth and stone), let him sink to his waist or neck, Mud to Rock.

Give him that letter/note you have with explosive runes on it. Make sure the explosive runes say 'learn to read'.

Polymorph him into something awesome, then suggestion him into clearing out that local orc infestation.

Alter self into him, announce that you will impersonate him to (insert nastiness here), then dominate him into helping. Use him as a scapegoat.

Cast fly on him, then dispel it when he's up high enough

Teleport him anywhere he wants to go, then leave him there.

Bestow curse (your choice of nastiness), arcane mark so you can scry him easily.

Grant him a wish. Make sure it's twisted.

Foretell his future for him.

Summon a fiend. Offer the commoners soul if the fiend makes you laugh.

Dominate person (or just immobilize him), sending to local BBEG with message "Got room for a lackey? I have a blank humanoid here for sale/as a donation", wait for reply, programmed amnesia to specs, teleport him to meeting point.

Polymorph (Bad Luck Brian), permanency, Bestow Curse (Bad Luck Brian).

Say "Hey, i remember you! You're that guy from the tavern who had that crazy awesome idea! Heres 1,000gp to do it." Scry him later to see how he's doing.

Delayed Blast fireball, say "Pow!". Smile at his confusion. Smile more a few seconds later.

Shapechange into a succubus.

[gooddragon1]

Assuming he has less than 100 hp: Power word kill (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/powerWordKill.htm).

No save, just die.

[Deophaun]

Alright, let's start with prestidigitation.

Make something deadly taste good. Feed it to the commoner. He'll ask for seconds until it kills him.
Tower shield + Shrink item + Prestidigitation = A wafer thin mint.

[kreenlover]

Hmm, how to, how to?

Cut off his left hand. Use the spell Create Crawling Claw, to animate his own left hand. Sick it on him

Persisted Symbol of Pain

Summon Instrument (piano) above him

Wall of Iron, Shape Metal, to make a safe, hang it above him, but rope.

Wish for Tarrasque to awaken beneath him.

Wish for Commoner to find and try to kill Tarrasque.

Prestigitation to make Commoner taste like most delicious everything ever (and smell like it too) watch animals devour him.

Baleful Polymorph him into a large, succulent roast turkey. Bring it to his family, and tell them that 'Christmas is happening after all!' Watch as his own family eats him.

And the list goes on...

(And on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on, and on)^1000^1000^1000^1000^1000^1000

and so on and so forth

[Lightlawbliss]

in a naturally cold area, soil the commoner's cloths with prestidigitation and let him freeze to death.

illusionary terrain and a volcano or large container (natural or artifical) full of boiling water.

[Humble Master]

in a naturally cold area, soil the commoner's cloths with prestidigitation and let him freeze to death.
Wait, why do you need to soil his clothes?

[Lightlawbliss]

Wait, why do you need to soil his clothes? You ever worn wet clothing when it's really cold out? If it's cold enough to do serious damage, the clothing will freeze solid.

[NeoPhoenix0]

Point a rod of wonder at him and keep using it until he's dead.

Edit: Point a greater rod of wonder (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/dnd/20060807a) at him and keep using it until he dies.

Use whelm on him until he is knocked out. Set up camp and keep using whelm on him every time he gets up. Wait until he starves to death.

[Lightlawbliss]

Point a rod of wonder at him and keep using it until he's dead.

Edit: Point a greater rod of wonder (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/dnd/20060807a) at him and keep using it until he dies.

Use whelm on him until he is knocked out. Set up camp and keep using whelm on him every time he gets up. Wait until he starves to death.

off topic: you can starve someone to death in dnd?

[Kane0]

off topic: you can starve someone to death in dnd?

I believe so. Starvation and dehydration deal non-lethal damage with special qualities. I don't think lack of sleep does though, which is the really odd one.

[Kuulvheysoon]

I believe so. Starvation and dehydration deal non-lethal damage with special qualities. I don't think lack of sleep does though, which is the really odd one.

Hmm... I know that Elder Evils (of all places!) has rules for sleep deprivation, but I can't remember if it eventually culminates in death.

Anybody got the book handy?

[NeoPhoenix0]

off topic: you can starve someone to death in dnd?

Just double check and no you can not die of starvation.


Starvation And Thirst

Characters might find themselves without food or water and with no means to obtain them. In normal climates, Medium characters need at least a gallon of fluids and about a pound of decent food per day to avoid starvation. (Small characters need half as much.) In very hot climates, characters need two or three times as much water to avoid dehydration.

A character can go without water for 1 day plus a number of hours equal to his Constitution score. After this time, the character must make a Constitution check each hour (DC 10, +1 for each previous check) or take 1d6 points of nonlethal damage.

A character can go without food for 3 days, in growing discomfort. After this time, the character must make a Constitution check each day (DC 10, +1 for each previous check) or take 1d6 points of nonlethal damage.

Characters who have taken nonlethal damage from lack of food or water are fatigued. Nonlethal damage from thirst or starvation cannot be recovered until the character gets food or water, as needed—not even magic that restores hit points heals this damage.

They apparently just lie there until they die of old age or other means or someone finds you and feeds you. Mind you if you lie there for 3 years and then are fed, it is going to take a long time to wake up. Unless someone knows a way to remove thousands of nonlethal damage quickly.

[DisasterArea42]

Stone shape the ground around the commoner into a ball, Dominate the first Barbarian you see and have him roll the Commoner-ball around singing Katamari on the Rocks (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMH49ieL4es). The more your Bard friend plays along, the better.

[erok0809]

Reality Maelstrom, letting him live to death on whatever plane he ends up on. If we're lucky it'll be Pandemonium or Limbo. Even if it is Elysium or Celestia, he's gotta die eventually, even if you have nothing to do with it. It's always fun that way

[Dimers]

Just to be extra-mean ... Tenser's Transformation. :smallsmile:

[NeoPhoenix0]

Use some form of mind control such as charm person, dominate, or mind rape. Then have him be a willing subject of your teleport through time (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/pg/20030409b) spell. Then take him to meet himself. Have a sandwich while 'they' are forced to try and kill 'each other'. If the past him wins he will die when he meets you in the future (assuming events transpire the same way. If the past him dies, as is more likely, you have a paradox that only the DM can fix.

[Bickerstaff]

Polymorph Any Object the commoner into a flea. A harmless little flea.
Put the flea in a box.
Put that box inside of another box.
Mail box to self.
When it arrives, smash it with a hammer!

It's brilliant, brilliant, brilliant, I tell you! Genius, I say!

[Woodzyowl]

Genesis a plane with time modified. Stay there for a few days. Leave.

[Snowbluff]

Tower shield + Shrink item + Prestidigitation = A wafer thin mint.

Okay, that's shrink item and prest done. How many more spells to go?

[supermonkeyjoe]

Fly at leas 200' above the commoner and cast Translocation Trick, the wizard is now on the ground looking like the commoner, the commoner is 200' in the air looking like a wizard.

Commoner has no means of flight so plummets to the ground and dies horribly (barring exceptional luck)

"commoner" walks over to the "wizard" that just plummeted to the ground. picks a random item from the corpse, proclaims the power of the cosmos is now his, flies 200 feet upwards to the amazement of all the other commoners in the area.

Repeat.

[nedz]

Disintegrate + Quickened Unseen Servant to sweep up the dust.

Blowing it away with Gust of Wind or Prestidigitating the dust under the carpet are also options here.

[ericgrau]

Along those lines there is the old trick that claims the target can't be resurrected because he never actually dies. I don't buy it but here it is: Flesh to stone, stone to mud, add mud to water, purify food and drink.

[Snowbluff]

You could Unname them. That'd be funny. And embarrassing.

[hydraa]

Silent -> Wail of the Banshee
(10th level but I think there are ways to reduce it)

The wizard just silent screams at the commoner 'DIE'. Nothing is seen (maybe a bit of air distortion>), nothing is heard, The commoner just dies (if he fails the fort save)

[nedz]

Disintegrate + Fabricate

Make a figurine of the Commoner out of his ashes.

[Dimers]

Several castings of Thunderhead! :smalltongue:

bzap ... crackle ... zorch ... zap ... zznap ... bzap ...

[Threadnaught]

Buff your Cat Familiar and Shapechange into a Cat, then kill.

If a Cat is too weak for a level 20 Commoner, then try a Dire Tiger... It's the next step really. :smallamused:

[ArqArturo]

Fly at leas 200' above the commoner and cast Translocation Trick, the wizard is now on the ground looking like the commoner, the commoner is 200' in the air looking like a wizard.

Commoner has no means of flight so plummets to the ground and dies horribly (barring exceptional luck)

"commoner" walks over to the "wizard" that just plummeted to the ground. picks a random item from the corpse, proclaims the power of the cosmos is now his, flies 200 feet upwards to the amazement of all the other commoners in the area.

Repeat.

Commoner breaks the cycle by stepping on an eagle, elevating just a bit higher, and achieves Enlightenment. He is now in possession of the Heavenly Palm of Buddha, and the wizard, amazed at his power, vows and calls him Master.


Polymorph Any Object into a flea. A harmless little flea.
Put the flea in a box.

Cut a whole in the box?.

[Slipperychicken]

Cut a whole in the box?.

Cast a touch spell.

Hold the charge.

Have him reach into the box.

[kreenlover]

Cast a touch spell.

Hold the charge.

Have him reach into the box.

they were referencing "The Emperor's New Groove" And now I have killed the joke by explaining it. :smallsigh:

He meant polymorph the commoner into a flea

[almightycoma]

flesh to ice then shatter. scoop into cup, followed by prestidigitation for flavor.
animate object (out house)
thematic spell (yellow and drippy) empowered snowball swarm

[Eldest]

Forcecage, no bars variant. Dies of not having enough air. (I've checked the numbers for this as a fancy way to execute a monk in a duel.)

[Slipperychicken]

they were referencing "The Emperor's New Groove" And now I have killed the joke by explaining it. :smallsigh:

He meant polymorph the commoner into a flea

The Disney movie? Gods, I haven't seen that in like a decade.


I thought we were referencing that Lonely Island song.

[ericgrau]

Forcecage, no bars variant. Dies of not having enough air. (I've checked the numbers for this as a fancy way to execute a monk in a duel.)

http://weestimatethat.blogspot.com/2012/04/it-takes-150-days-to-suffocate-if.html

[Devronq]

polymorph any object into a thin piece of paper/glass/stone/whatever and tear/smash/simular the commoner up.

use prestidigitation to start a landslide/avalanche

use a save or die spell

dominate them + clever word choice

polymorph any object into week predatory animal and throw them in the farmer's barn.

I know prestidigitation is one of those ambiguous spells and people disagree on some of the things it can do but this seems waaaay beyond the power of this spell. Unless you can push a 1lb rock and start some sort of chain reaction or something :P

[Augmental]

Okay, that's shrink item and prest done. How many more spells to go?

I'd be impressed if someone could find a way to kill a commoner using Abate Dracorage. :smallamused:

[Somensjev]

flesh to stone
rock to mud
mud to rock
stone to flesh

you now have a pile of commoner (i'm assuming these work in conjunction)

[NM020110]

1.) Forcecage (barred cage) to keep the commoner still for a while.
2.) Drop in a bag of everlasting rations, a decanter of endless water, and a bottle of air.
3.) Cast wall of force six times, forming a box of force entirely enclosing the commoner.
4.) Cast Permanency on each of the walls of force.
5.) Allow the commoner to die of old age.
6.) When age has claimed the commoner, disintegrate the body.
7.) Use prestidigitation to clean the ground of the remaining ashes.

Alternatively
1.) Buff yourself into nigh-invincibility.
2.) Hit commoner with spoon repeatedly until it dies.

[EyethatBinds]

Delay Poison, buy the commoner 100 drinks. Dispel magic or just let the spell expire. He then has to make 100 saves versus poison, if he fails enough it does CON damage and kills him if it takes his CON to 0.

[Lightlawbliss]

I know prestidigitation is one of those ambiguous spells and people disagree on some of the things it can do but this seems waaaay beyond the power of this spell. Unless you can push a 1lb rock and start some sort of chain reaction or something :P

when I said that, the chain reaction was what I had in mind. Irl, the variuos "stuff falls down mountain" events are all very easy to set off if you pick the right spot.

if you want something more reliable, there are plenty of other things a wizard could use to start something like that.

[Eldest]

http://weestimatethat.blogspot.com/2012/04/it-takes-150-days-to-suffocate-if.html

And yet, the rules say otherwise. (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/environment.htm#suffocation) Forcecage lasts 40 hours. For 34 of them, the commoner is taking 1d6 nonlethal damage every 15 minutes, and as soon as he hits -1, he's toast, pretty much.

[AgentofHellfire]

Use the spell Veil (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/veil.htm) to make him look like a criminal that's currently being hunted down by the city watch. Using divinations, find that criminal before the watch does and teleport him out. Ensure through collaboration that ludicrously bad attempts at deception and attempts to appear to be a fearful innocent victim are viewed as the criminal's shtick.

Alternatively! Use Programmed Amnesia on a commoner to make them think they're a powerful adventurer right at the moment a monster is attacking.

[CockroachTeaParty]

1.) Forcecage (barred cage) to keep the commoner still for a while.
2.) Drop in a bag of everlasting rations, a decanter of endless water, and a bottle of air.
3.) Cast wall of force six times, forming a box of force entirely enclosing the commoner.
4.) Cast Permanency on each of the walls of force.
5.) Allow the commoner to die of old age.
6.) When age has claimed the commoner, disintegrate the body.
7.) Use prestidigitation to clean the ground of the remaining ashes.


This is my favorite one so far. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemies.

[ericgrau]

Without an everflushing toilet, I don't think old age is what kills him.

[hydraa]

Without an everflushing toilet, I don't think old age is what kills him.

Then include a bag of devouring

[ericgrau]

What and provide easy access to early suicide?

[Norin]

Funny thread.

Anything like this for the druid spell list?

I found this old thread (http://community.wizards.com/go/thread/view/75882/19868806/Druid_Spell_Combos), but i want more fun combos

[AgentofHellfire]

What and provide easy access to early suicide?


Fine, then, regular Bag of Holding with a Homuculus or the like inside commanded to eat the stuff, and take the commoner out if he tries to go in.

[Jon_Dahl]

I would Arcane Mark him with the word "Witch" and let the villagers burn him.

[Lightlawbliss]

I would Arcane Mark him with the word "Witch" and let the villagers burn him.

so your personal mark is "Witch" ?

[ddude987]

1. Pao into cat
2. Put cat in box
3. Schrodingers cat
4. Look in the box
5. Dead cat
6. ???
7. No profit, it was a commoner.

[kreenlover]

1. Pao into cat
2. Put cat in box
3. Schrodingers cat
4. Look in the box
5. Dead cat
6. ???
7. No profit, it was a commoner.

But the cat may or may not be dead. So, even if you open the box, he may not be dead. But, until you open the box, he is both dead, and not dead!

wait... does this make him un-dead? :smalltongue:

[Jon_Dahl]

so your personal mark is "Witch" ?

Yeah, why not? I'm a hipster wizard, you know. Self-irony and all...

[Kazuel]

This thread reminds me of this song

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IJNR2EpS0jw

Could you somehow cast explosive runes on the inside of his eye lids?

[Bickerstaff]

they were referencing "The Emperor's New Groove" And now I have killed the joke by explaining it. :smallsigh:

He meant polymorph the commoner into a flea

I'm glad someone got it, at least!

I love that movie.

[Vknight]

Ray of Frost him once every hour until he dies.

Have him go into a broken torture device, Make Whole

Magnificent Mansion filled with clones of the Commoner

Animate Dead a swarm of skulls & spines and send them after the Commoner

Give him a 'magical sword' with a 'ruby', delayed fireball, somehow make it last for weeks kills him from merchants wanting revenge, or monsters eating him, or him keeping it and going boom

Contingency for spell that does non-lethal when he closes his eyes, cast sleep or teleport to random location, or both.
Then wait he will starve from never waking from the non-lethal or be eaten

Summon 1d4+1 Dire-Wolves, let the hunt begin

Tell him you will grant him his 3 wishes. Grant them to the letter and not the spirit, or other versions to mess with him

Put him in a 10', by 10', by 10' box, get a way to cast create water and repeat until the box if full and then seal the box
Seal box inside a sphere
Put it on a track which will keep it rolling for centuries
Wait

Boneblade his arms if he is not freaking out he should be.

Cast Spider Climb on him followed by Dispel magic once he gets high enough

[Somensjev]

make as many ice assassins of him as you can/want, put an arcane mark on all of them, give them some way to see the arcane marks, then tell them all to go find and kill the original (the one without a mark)

[Sith_Happens]

What and provide easy access to early suicide?

The Decanter of Endless Water isn't?

----------

Cast Wish, duplicate a Chained Dominate Animal, feed him to his own army of Battletitan Dinosaurs (what, how do think the commoner got to 20th level? This is obviously Bubs we're talking about).

[ericgrau]

That's painful, bet better than waiting I suppose. Leaving a tiny gap in the prison should help. Also prevents him from closing the bottle of air to slowly pass out and die peacefully.

Funny how we're struggling to keep him alive just so we can kill him in a worse way.

[Humble Master]

1.) Forcecage (barred cage) to keep the commoner still for a while.
2.) Drop in a bag of everlasting rations, a decanter of endless water, and a bottle of air.
3.) Cast wall of force six times, forming a box of force entirely enclosing the commoner.
4.) Cast Permanency on each of the walls of force.
5.) Allow the commoner to die of old age.
6.) When age has claimed the commoner, disintegrate the body.
7.) Use prestidigitation to clean the ground of the remaining ashes.

I smiled at this.

[avr]

Has anyone mentioned the possibility of boring the commoner to death with lectures about arcane philosophy yet? A low charisma wizard with a personality like certain university lecturers definitely has this in his/her repertoire.

[Vknight]

Knock unconscious build Iron Golem with a place on the torso to hold a body with iron bands. Attach peasant send Golem into battle

Give him the spell 'fly' tell him to jump off a cliff (Its actually Jump)

[Killer Angel]

Alternatively
1.) Buff yourself into nigh-invincibility.
2.) Hit commoner with spoon repeatedly until it dies.

You were thinking to this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VDvgL58h_Y), right? :smallbiggrin:

[Malroth]

convert his lv 20 PC wealth by level into 7500 tons of copper pieces, drop it all on the commoner at once

[ArqArturo]

You were thinking to this (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9VDvgL58h_Y), right? :smallbiggrin:

Now I want to make an Rogue/Ghost-faced killer with Improvised Weapon Proficency.

[Devronq]

This thread reminds me of this song

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IJNR2EpS0jw

Could you somehow cast explosive runes on the inside of his eye lids?

Ya but could he read it? i mean you can really see the inside of your eyelids so much as make out words and such?

[elonin]

Shrink item boulder and throw at peasant.

Reverse gravity.

PaO into a chicken. cook with flaming sphere.

[Lightlawbliss]

shapechange into an animated trebutche and launch his house at him, reload with telekinesis and repeat. If commoner survives longer then the debrisi from his house, launch him instead.

[Tokiko Mima]

How about how a wizard doesn't kill you?

Flesh to Stone ---> Rock to Mud ---> Wish replicates Purify Food and Drink.

Now the commoner is trapped in a state where they are not technically dead - if you could collect all the water molecules back together, you could technically revive them by adding dirt and reversing the process. But that would require rather exotic magic, that is unlikely to exist and even less likely to be used. And since you don't age when you're suspended, the commoner is likely to "survive" the heat death of the universe.

[Deathkeeper]

Gate or similar spell to bring in a powerful but potentially harmless entity.
Watch as the commoner fails all his Knowledge rolls, says something wrong and gets it offended, and is horribly cursed/destroyed.

[Killer Angel]

How about how a wizard doesn't kill you?

Flesh to Stone ---> Rock to Mud ---> Wish replicates Purify Food and Drink.


At this point, you can even drink him. And with prestigidation, it tastes good.

[Karoht]

A wizard is seen with a horse on his castle grounds and surrounding farmlands.
He is seen riding the horse.
He is seen hitching the horse to a plow and plowing some fields.
He is seen hitching the horse to a wagon and giving the locals a hayride.

He is then seen escorting the horse to the edge of the property. A mumble of incantations later, the Baleful Polymorph spell is removed, revealing a scruffy looking halfling.

"And next time I catch you stealing from me, so help me I will turn you into a cow and milk you."

The halfling runs away, to tell the rest of the theives guild that there is really nothing of value at Castle Hallmark.

[kreenlover]

Teleport through time with the commoner to the beginning of civilization. Leave him there. Let him live him to death.

[7thW1ckedness]

high level ray of disintegration to create a BIG pit beneath them, cast move earth to fill it in.

>no save<

if it buries them up to the neck, use create weapon to summon a golf club.