Things to do with dead bodies

[rgrekejin]

So, I'm DMing a campaign, and I've written myself into a bit of a corner. I have a party of five third-level PCs. They've been sent by the church of Pelor to investigate a cemetery in a small, outlying town where there have been reports of graves recently being disturbed. The suspicion is that necromancy is afoot. However... I don't want it to actually *be* necromancy, or someone making a golem, or something. And I really can't think of any reason that someone would be digging up the bodies of poor, otherwise unremarkable peasants. So... any thoughts on what else bodies can be used for?

[Rubik]

Grotesque modern art. Use Fabricate to turn them into meat-trees and use Gentle Repose to keep them fresh.

[lycantrope]

Some poor npc trying to fulfill the requirements for Lichloved feat from BoVD while on a budget.

[ShadowFireLance]

Dinner? :smallcool::smallwink:

[Waker]

You could have something digging up the corpses to eat. That way the party goes in expecting a Necromancer, but instead they find some animal is just going for an easy meal.

Or how about you have a doctor who's bad at his job?
Someone making voodoo zombies? (As in, people in an induced deathlike coma waking up in their graves.)

[Theoboldi]

How about a group of ghouls who have run low on food?

[asnys]

They're potion ingredients. What do you think all that gold for magic item crafting is spent on? These guys are just getting a discount by acquiring it personally.

They're being eaten by ghouls who've moved in.

The person doing this is actually insane and it serves no real purpose.

They're not after the bodies. One of the peasants was more than he seemed, and was buried with a map to a place of power. Problem is, the grave isn't marked, so they're digging at random.

They're not after the bodies. It's smugglers. They're caching goods in the graveyard where the police won't find them.

They're being used by medical students to practice surgery.

[Nettlekid]

Perhaps the stonemason is low on supplies, and all they've got is a relic from an Archmage who once ruled the land: A Spell Clock of Flesh to Stone. Not a murderer, the stonemason digs up the graves of people who don't need their flesh anymore in order to carve it into bricks. Or maybe into the tombstones of the newly deceased.

Made more morbid if you use Flesh to Salt or Flesh to Ice instead, and change stonemason into innkeeper. "It's Priest...have a little Priest..." Actually, no need for spell, just make it cannibalism. The town is starving or something. And it gives you an excuse for a Ghoul encounter when the cannibalistic townspeople die a natural death.

I've also wanted to make a hedge maze that the PCs have to travel through, and at the end they have to fight some Splinterwaifs, who have the power to turn a corpse into...a hedge. So that maze that they probably cut/burned down to get through? Yeah, lotta bodies. But that works better with kidnappings than graverobbings.

[QuintonBeck]

Collecting teeth for sacrifice to the faeries that have been attacking a poor farmer's farm.

A Renaissance esque doctor. With clerics and cure wounds doctor falls off a bit as a profession but a true scientist might want to know what makes the body go and with the church running everything and having their clerics they won't allow research "legally" so he's doing some of his own. He's not evil, just a curious scientist with the belief that once your dead what good is your body? Might as well study it.

An aspiring barber who's practicing his trade on the dead before risking anyone's real hair.

[Nettlekid]

I guess we should ask, what's your end goal? You want it not to be a necromancer, but do you want it to be something evil and malicious, something not-harmful but a bit disturbing, or something innocent and a misunderstanding?

[mabriss lethe]

A goblin scavenging party is camped nearby. It's easier and less risky for them to raid the graveyard for some basic supplies than it would be to try to pilfer from the town proper.

[The Viscount]

Someone could have captured a Barghest, Maurezhi, or Dusk Giant, and then be feeding it to strengthen it for some sort of siege or underground fighting ring.

[Fyermind]

A mad artist is selling lifelike statues of peasants at work. Actually he has an item of flesh to stone. He's been selling them at high prices to a socialist middle class growing in the city.

A mad wizard believes he has found an arcane form of resurrection, but he hasn't quite gotten it right. He is unearthing corpses to practice and try to find where his spell isn't working. When the PCs stop the grave diggers who have been unearthing to corpses to sell to him, he starts committing murders.

[rgrekejin]

I guess we should ask, what's your end goal? You want it not to be a necromancer, but do you want it to be something evil and malicious, something not-harmful but a bit disturbing, or something innocent and a misunderstanding?

Any of those outcomes is really fine with me. I'm mostly looking for something interesting a unexpected. The primary purpose for this mission - getting the PCs together and traveling as a party - is already accomplished, and I don't plan on this mission having any real relevance with respect to the plot I've assembled for the primary campaign, which is why I haven't given it a thought ahead of time. Essentially, any creative suggestion that isn't likely to end in a TPK is welcome. Thanks everyone for the thoughts so far! It's late in my timezone, so I'm going to bed for a bit, but I see some good ideas already! Thanks a lot!

[Novawurmson]

I like all the "bodies are secondary to the real reason" concepts. Maybe something like:

-It's a mostly harmless burrowing creature that doesn't like having its house dug into repeatedly and keeps shoving the coffins out.
-It's a recently developed planar anomaly that randomly teleports nearby objects; if it continues to grow, it could pose a serious risk to the town.
-The town specifically moves the bodies around whenever business is slow to get adventurers to spend a few nights at the inn and blow some cash.
-A murderer is hiding his victims in the coffins of the recently dead and leaving the old bodies out, knowing they'll attract more suspicion than the re-buried coffins.
-A mostly neutral/good vampire/similar undead broke down and bit someone in a fit of recklessness, but they got away before the vampire knew who they were. Now he/she's desperately digging up graves of the recently dead, trying to figure out who it was to kill them before they turn.

[intothenight]

The corpses are being used as spell components. Either that, or they contain something that serves as spell components, such as maggots that have eaten humanoid flesh. Whatever spell needs those components would be up to you, but I doubt it's Cure Moderate Wounds.

[Rubik]

A unique artifact was buried with its original owner long, long ago. This artifact is needed for a ritual that needs to be carried out every few hundred years to prevent incursion from the Far Realm, Faerie, the Plane of Shadow, or a demiplane holding a sealed evil in a can. Divinations have revealed that it's buried in one of the many graveyards surrounding [insert town name here], but divination magics can't pinpoint it any better than that due to the custom of burying their dead in lead-lined coffins and mausoleums, believing that it reduces or prevents the raising of undead through "natural" means. The time for the rite is approaching, and the priest/wizard/whatever and his acolytes are desperately trying to find artifact without being caught so they aren't attacked and burned at the stake. A successful attempt to stop them means that very bad things can and will happen in the near future.

[Darth Stabber]

1) Marionette puppets!
2) It was actually an illusion.
3) attracting flies to collect their acidic spit, and using the acidic spit to melt down the walls of the first national bank. the villian is a fiendish cow
4) it's actually the PC's corpses, they've been dead the whole time. The church thought it was best to see it for themselves, as opposed to freaking out when told.

[erikun]

The town has been looking at expanding their graveyard, because it is full, into the neighboring woods. The woods, unknown to the townsfolk, is home to a druid circle and the local druids are not keen on having it found and desecrated.

As such, the druids have been digging up the graves at night, taking the bodies and the gravestones with them. They've been burying them in the woods, and smashing the gravestones and throwing the bits into the river. Their plan is that, with the graves empty and vacant, that any new deaths would be placed in the graveyard rather than the expansion happening.

[XionUnborn01]

4) it's actually the PC's corpses, they've been dead the whole time. The church thought it was best to see it for themselves, as opposed to freaking out when told.

This, so much this! Go all sixth sense on them. You can either make it the church that did it, or some god/devil/faerie/[insert being here] that wants them to discover it so they can re-enter their bodies to fulfill their Chosen Fate (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheChosenOne) (Warning: TvTropes Link)

[captain fubar]

a local bard has been casting Animate Objects on the corpses to make props for his deranged play "pelors victory over the undead" if the if any of the pcs attend have it include a galiger scene and put their seats in the splash zone.

[Rubik]

a local bard has been casting Animate Objects on the corpses to make props for his deranged play "pelors victory over the undead" if the if any of the pcs attend have it include a galiger scene and put their seats in the splash zone.Oh. Wow. Gallagher, huh? That's definitely morbid.

And Pelor's victory should be where he controls them all for his own fiendish purposes.

It's satire...

...

...right?

[captain fubar]

Oh. Wow. Gallagher, huh? That's definitely morbid.

And Pelor's victory should be where he controls them all for his own fiendish purposes.

It's satire...

...

...right?

I think of pelor as more of a gray guard who won't mind beating everyone on town to find out if any of them might be undead. he might not be a fiend but every single one of his paladins are either grayguards or fighter/clerics.
pelor falls so often he should be stated with atonment as a spell like ability.:smalltongue:

as for the morbid play you dont want the players to just sit through the whole thing this gives them a reason to either leave early or respond with outrage and it gives a bard a reason to leave town quick rather than staying near their formerly adoring fans. but most of all it's alot more memerable than if zombies spontaniously rose from the grave.

though in all honistly i just read graves opened not undead in the OP and thought "by raw a body has become an object what can come of this"

[Eyclonus]

Some one is searching for a rare ring that was swallowed by a child from that village many years ago, the ring has a bonding property, so the only way to find it is to dig up the corpse.

The individual concerned isn't stupid enough to think they could get away with random murder due to the dates being so far back so they're unearthing graves to find it.

[rgrekejin]

4) it's actually the PC's corpses, they've been dead the whole time. The church thought it was best to see it for themselves, as opposed to freaking out when told.

This is, actually, surprisingly close to what the main plot of the campaign is going to be.

[Kudaku]

I like the idea of a doctor trying to further medical research by studying anatomy - since buying or otherwise acquiring access bodies is difficult and heavily frowned on he's struggling to find suitable cadavers. Graverobbing is the unfortunate, messy, illegal, and overall less than ideal solution.

He treats the bodies with care, re-buries them when he is done, and makes sure not to disturb the remains any more than is necessary for his studies.


Have the players find the dirt in the cemetery disturbed, but the cadavers are still in their coffins. If the players actually unearth and open a coffin (cue dark night, rain, thunder in the background) they find that each body has a different section of its body flayed, laid open, and then meticulously sewn back together.

[Segev]

The local lord is unusually harsh, and is ruthless in hunting down and executing serfs who try to move away to find a better life. The mayor's son is a clever rogue who concocted a scheme to administer a particular poison to those who want to escape. It fakes death. The disturbed graves are the result of the young man going out to dig the buried-alive but comatose serfs out, and taking them to a small hunting lodge the lord doesn't use in this cold winter season unless he knows there are serfs to go chase down. They recover there, and the mayor's son gives them some supplies to help them on their way.

[unseenmage]

There is a local history story of a deadly disease that swept the land ages past, these are the corpses from that time period.

Some enterprising bioalchemist is trying to start up a pandemic.

[Novawurmson]

The local lord is unusually harsh, and is ruthless in hunting down and executing serfs who try to move away to find a better life. The mayor's son is a clever rogue who concocted a scheme to administer a particular poison to those who want to escape. It fakes death. The disturbed graves are the result of the young man going out to dig the buried-alive but comatose serfs out, and taking them to a small hunting lodge the lord doesn't use in this cold winter season unless he knows there are serfs to go chase down. They recover there, and the mayor's son gives them some supplies to help them on their way.

This is my favorite, even more than my own suggestions.

[angry_bear]

A rival church is removing the bodies, and carrying out their own burial rituals on the corpses. Almost purely to spite Pelor and his followers.

A new type of Mimic now resemble coffins and are eating those buried in them. They then eat the dirty burying them so that they can be reused...

The cemetery is directly below a series of underground caverns where some kind of carrion feeder lives. The grave sites only appear to be dug up, when in actuality the freshly disturbed dirty is sinking into the tunnels when the creature digs up (down? lol) the coffins from beneath.

[unseenmage]

A rival church is removing the bodies, and carrying out their own burial rituals on the corpses. Almost purely to spite Pelor and his followers.

A new type of Mimic now resemble coffins and are eating those buried in them. They then eat the dirty burying them so that they can be reused...

The cemetery is directly below a series of underground caverns where some kind of carrion feeder lives. The grave sites only appear to be dug up, when in actuality the freshly disturbed dirty is sinking into the tunnels when the creature digs up (down? lol) the coffins from beneath.

You just gave me the image of those little mechanical mole traps you can buy at the hardware store... scaled up to landshark size!

My Artificer has a new project. :smallsmile:

[kestrel404]

Someone is brewing Hurlg. It's a pale pink ale made from fermented grain and carrion. Only trolls, ogres and certain breeds of goblin can stomach the stuff, and is generally brewed by Hags or Ogre-Mages, who like to use corpses that have been 'aging' for just the right amount of time (opinions differ on how long that is depending on the brewer), though some aren't all that picky.

It's highly addictive, so once the PCs hunt down the monster responsible for brewing the fowl stuff, they'll incur the wrath of any number of lesser creatures for 'cutting off their supply'.

[Alabenson]

If you really want to freak out your party, have the culprit be a deranged individual who's using the corpses for home decor a la Ed Gein (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ed_Gein#Crimes)

[Lord Vukodlak]

While these peasants were unremarkable they are the children or perhaps grand children of a group of important people. A generation or two ago a group of minor adventures decided to retire. They hid there magical gear in a safe location before settling down for a quite life.

The wizard of the group made a special map that was divided among them and passed onto their descendents, when the pieces are united it reveals the location of the treasure cache. However the importance of these heirlooms was quickly forgotten and eventually buried with their descendants.

But then some guy found a journal of one of the retired heroes and learned about the treasure cache so now he' digging up the descendants of the adventuring group in order to find the pieces of the map.

[rgrekejin]

The cemetery is directly below a series of underground caverns where some kind of carrion feeder lives. The grave sites only appear to be dug up, when in actuality the freshly disturbed dirty is sinking into the tunnels when the creature digs up (down? lol) the coffins from beneath.

...ding ding ding, we have a winner! Thanks for all your suggestions, everybody!

[7thW1ckedness]

I like all the "bodies are secondary to the real reason" concepts. Maybe something like:

-The town specifically moves the bodies around whenever business is slow to get adventurers to spend a few nights at the inn and blow some cash.

This. Is an AWESOME idea. I think I'm going to have to steal it.